Football Cliches
Adam Hurrey & Goalhanger
300 episodes
Deconstructing the gloriously unique language of football – the words, the phrases and the tiny things you didn't think you cared about – with Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare & David Walker. Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN
Episodes page 2 of 6
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The fixture pile-up threshold, Sean Dyche playing "Sean Dyche" & under-10s trophy parades
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare, David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: the trickiest title-race-classification task so far, legendary Premier League goalkeepers in petty…
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Team-talk mythology & the stickers of European toilet cubicles: The listeners' loves & hates
Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the…
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Great adverts for the pyramid, technicians of the sphere & Qatar to Coventry in 3 minutes
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the threshold for the Premier League to tweet the words "and breathe...", the sound of York City's last-gasp,…
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Elite barbers' FPL advantage, the Collins-Tomkins dilemma & doing The Terrestrial
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the greatest player ever to have a surname that starts with the same letter their first name ends with,…
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Lee Dixon on toast, “advantage City” & a commentator's Copacabana complex
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: Sunday Supplement pastry queries, a cultural review of Manchester 2 Arsenal 1, Darren Fletcher's ongoing hang-up…
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Unexpected Stevenage, premature hauntings & the Premier League goal caught on CCTV
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the imminent demise of the iconic Champions League match ball, Carlos Queiroz's highly logical new job,…
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Half-and-half Shakespearean scarves, scouting for Shevchenko & the half-dozen crisis
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: a stand-out candidate for commentator's curse of the season, a worrying statistic for Pep Guardiola, the prospect of the…
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The Football Cliches Quiz XXIII: Cliches vs Career We Go
The 23rd edition of the Football Clichés Quiz sees Adam, Charlie and Nick take on their familiar foes of Bobby, Theo and Eamo from four-time quiz visitors the Career We Go podcast. The questions include: experimental…
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FA Cup lustre status, Ally McCoist's cliche mashup... and every Premier League game ever
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: reviewing a perfectly-formed set of FA Cup quarter-finals, Ally McCoist combines three subtly different cliches…
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The Extinction XI
Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Michael Cox to select a lineup of player types that have - temporarily or permanently - gone out of footballing fashion. The selection process takes in truly unhinged…
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Biggleswade bragging rights, Tanzania 0 Liechtenstein 1 & Keysey's perfect Christmas
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: Dave's Sunday League management rollercoaster, Ben White's surreal Wembley evening, David Moyes's pointless Brazilian…
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Football vs The Dictionary: Susie Dent on bus-parking & bouncebackability
The pod welcomes Susie Dent, the queen of Countdown's dictionary corner, to examine the language of football in the sort of detail we've always dreamed of. Susie takes us through the ironic death of the word…
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The Carabao Supremacy, yodelling commentators & the absolute Joe Hart
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: a cultural review of the Carabao Cup final, a yodelling commentator at Craven Cottage, Glenn Hoddle's…
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GoPro goalkeepers & textbook crossfield-pass apologies: The listeners' loves & hates
Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the…
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”My baby looks like Gary Megson", MOTD donking & in dreamland with Bodo/Glimt
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the tense early exchanges of Dave's parenthood, Peter Drury resorting to the L-word at the Emirates on Saturday,…
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BBC live-text sad lads & watching football in the boozer, with Jimmy "Dead Pubs" McIntosh
The pod welcomes the writer, esteemed pintsman and creator of Dead Pubs, Jimmy McIntosh, for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks, as he chooses his six personal fascinations and irritations of football. Among…
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FA Cup scares/dumpings/cruises, dark orange cards & Roman gladiator VAR
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and Nick Miller. On the agenda: a new shade of yellow card is invented, VAR delays in Roman times, legendary goalscorers' names in police…
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The freefall threshold, Benjamin Sesko's windows & the streets forgetting Santiago Munez
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and James Maw. On the agenda: the official start to the business end of the season, Wolves getting people whispering, Evann Guessand's very…
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Co-commentary cues, flopping full-backs & the "one of our own" threshold, with Lucy Ward
The pod welcomes TNT Sports co-commentator Lucy Ward for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks, as she chooses her six personal fascinations and irritations of football. Among Lucy's selections are the joy of…
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The 5-a-side keepers' union & World Cup pub bunting: The listeners' loves & hates
Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and Nick Miller entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the…
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Literally ghosting, Larry David's Champions League commentary & Sir Alex's 2011/12 title curse
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and, for his 100th appearance, Nick Miller. On the agenda: a cultural review of the North London derby, the threshold for a team "laying a glove" on…
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Hoddle's Curse strikes again, the world-record fans' favourite & a saucy U-turn
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: Glenn Hoddle suffers the commentator's curse in the Champions League once again, Tony Dorigo's possible…
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The Forest-Watford Vortex, champagne players & Pep vs Daffy Duck
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: Pep Guardiola vs Daffy Duck in a fight for the soul of the FA Cup, whistling co-commentators, footballers’ names in US cop…
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Generic Spurs punditry, regurgitating possession & ding-dong stalemates: The 500th episode
Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the 500th episode of the podcast. On the agenda: the finer details and ramifications of Thomas Frank being sacked by Spurs, celebrity chefs' names in…
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Introverted full-backs, radio commentary synchronicity & the Champions League of trees
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: Steve Bruce adds a crucial syllable to Pep Guardiola's legacy, gloriously synchronised radio commentary at Derby…
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”Absolute wimp", Arsenal's pre-ignited quadruple & a Doha denouement
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: Carabao Cup curiosities, the exact status of Arsenal's quadruple hopes, a very subtle footballing prefix…
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Scorpion scepticism, 80% ball knowledge & Conor Coady's Football Clubs (2026 edition)
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: subtle podcast references at the darts, goal probabilities with Clinton Morrison, West Brom fans' limited patience with…
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Flats that overlook stadiums & the optimum time for Sky Sports News: The listeners' loves & hates
Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the…
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The "what's eating Erling Haaland?" threshold, FA Cup anthem fears & Gary Weaver's Circle of Goals
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare, David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: a quickfire review of Arsenal 2 Manchester United 3, unacceptably-named Premier League top scorers in…
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Zohran Mamdani's PL Years & a chat with Éanna Hardwicke on playing Roy Keane in Saipan
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: a familiar name pops up at the Australian Open, Arsene Wenger's "daylight" offside law to be trialled in…
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The moment the AFCON final peaked, Wenger's Law & football gestures at bus stops
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: the unifying absurdity that was the Africa Cup of Nations final, whether Spurs vs West Ham's "El Dissatisfactico" is the…
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Properly getting out, cricketing ASMR, and shadow umpire’s call
It’s the final outing of the winter for Cricket Cliches, the first branch line of the Cliches network, and there’s an end of term feeling as the full team assembles to see us home. We’ve got egregious commentary and a…
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Shane Todd on post-save goalkeeper emotions & professional footballer-botherer Rio Ferdinand
Shane Todd on post-save goalkeeper emotions & professional footballer-botherer Rio Ferdinand The pod welcomes comedian and presenter Shane Todd for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks, as he chooses his six…
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Semenyo's 0.028% return, six nicknames in 15 seconds & Scotland's bottom dogs
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: a minor technicality with Cup-upset measuring, the size of the chunk of Antoine Semenyo's fee he had paid back,…
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41-year-old blokes playing for prime Barca, Ken Barlow's terrace anthem, and the Sir Alex blessing
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: Manchester United's legacy machine cranks into gear again, some confusion over the pronunication of…
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Resurgent corner flags, Eddie Howe's onslaught threshold & "the Pound Shop Potter”
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: a whistle-stop tour of the media reaction to Chelsea and Manchester United's managerial upheaval, the Premier League…
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Snake pits and minefields, the shadow follow-on, and catching on camera
The fifth outing for the Cricket Cliches crew but are they now set? And what does that mean, anyway? The shadow batting debate intensifies as we enter the second innings; Tickers (and most of the audience) are on…
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That Man DCL, heading your granny & clowns in Slough bunkers
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the freescoring Dominic Calvert-Lewin passes a very particular threshold, Match of the Day exceeds its goalkeeper…
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Domestic shadow-batting, no mugs, and spectator stress
While England self-immolate, Cricket Cliches maintains its admittedly modest run of form in our fourth outing. Aussie commentators Aaron Finch and Adam Gilchrist are taken to task as they play fast and loose… with…
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Absolute dreamland: The Best of Football Clichés in 2025
Every football pundit ever, condensed into one approximated voice; accidental nursery rhymes in Champions League commentary; last-gasp Cliches Quiz drama; red-card timekeeping technicalities; "Hawk on!", Niclas…
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Glove-spitting goalkeepers & edge-of-the-D drama at five-a-side: The listeners' loves & hates
Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the…
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North-east river supremacy, David Moyes' giant duck & Keysey's nutmegs
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the media wrestles with what to call the derby between Sunderland and Newcastle, bafflingly-transcribed football…
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Tricky little sessions, daddy hundreds, and getting hit "amidships"
The Ashes are basically done and dusted after England’s pink ball capitulation. Time for the third session of Cricket Cliches, but is it a tricky little one? Stokes and Baz have been facing the media, maybe the…
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Unexpected Clive Tyldesley noises & Gabriel's hypothetical Arsenal own-goal hell
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: England's March "send-off" to the World Cup, Clive Tyldesley commentary intonations in Sky Atlantic…
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Uzbekistan vs Colombia at 3am, the Infantino Shrug & a dubious bagsman
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: a review of the World Cup draw ceremony, forecasting the nation's TV viewing habits next summer, why Mohamed Salah…
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I Wanna Dance With Peter Drury, grinding out a 5-4 & Haaland's League One future
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: Richarlison’s claims to a niche world record, whether you can "grind out" a 5-4 win, the most "X years of…
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Commentator's curse conspiracies, homegrown stewards & Lee Hendrie's "highgevity”
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: A commentator’s curse turns into a mini-saga with no winners, League Two stadium names in viral, overpriced New…
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Expected leaves, driving "on the up" & absolute Ebony Rainford-Brent
It’s the second test for the Cricket Cliches crew featuring our first change as cricket writer Charlie Reynolds steps in for Nick Miller. On the agenda today; Ashes misery, who deserves more sympathy? Holiday-makers…
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The Football Cliches Quiz XXII: Cliches vs Career We Go — The Decider
The 22nd edition of the Football Clichés Quiz sees Adam, Charlie and Dave take on Bobby, Joe and Eamo from three-time quiz visitors the Career We Go podcast. The questions include: Anguillan internationals,…
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Arsenal's official title status, Idris Elba's prefix woe & the verb "to goal”
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: Charlie's Sunday Supplement debut, the soundtrack of a comeback from 2-0 down away from home, the definitive…
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