Podcasts · Comedy · Society & Culture

The Wittering Whitehalls

Global

300 episodes · Explicit

Have you got a problem? Are you at the end of your tether? Perhaps you’d like to enlist the help of Michael & Hilary Whitehall? This podcast is your invitation to take a comfy seat in the Whitehall family home and garner their thoughts on everything from workouts to weddings, seaside towns to social media and everything in between.

More about the show

Expect rants, raves, harsh truths and expletives as Hilary & Michael consider your points of view and possibly even help you solve an issue!

The Whitehalls are offering you complete access to their combined life experiences and the precious wisdom that they’ve gathered over the years, so why not take them up on it?!

You can email your questions, thoughts or problems to TheWitteringWhitehalls@gmail.com

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Episodes page 2 of 6

  1. Spirits, Marital Matching & Brazilian Jazz

    · 44 min · S11 E9 · Explicit

    Mr Whitehall receives an invitation from a DL this week, but will he accept? Meanwhile, Mrs Whitehall considers whether or not she'd like contact from the other side. You can email your questions, thoughts or problems…

  2. LIFE LESSONS: "Always travel with a pen and a post-it note."

    · 26 min · Bonus · Explicit

    This weeks bonus episode is frothing with very exciting ideas and it's not short on advice either... What are your unexpected must-haves? You can email your questions, thoughts or problems to…

  3. A DL Meetup, Opening Post & RUBIES!

    · 38 min · S11 E8 · Explicit

    What is the traditional gift for a 40th wedding anniversary? If you didn't already know, this episode will tell you in no uncertain terms: It's RUBIES. Plus, a wonderful idea inspired by DL Sally in Melbourne and an…

  4. LIFE LESSONS: "Say it with a smile."

    · 28 min · Bonus · Explicit

    Because The Wittering Whitehalls has been trucking on for so long, there are lots of well-established traditions that we all love. This week, it's one of those "Mr Whitehall becomes exasperated reading a particularly…

  5. The Brits, Emus & Lumpy Downloads

    · 42 min · S11 E7 · Explicit

    Mrs Whitehall made the MOST of the Brits the other week... Sadly, Mr Whitehall had other plans which involved staying at home and most definitely, not going to the Brits. Plus, what really happened at the emu farm and…

  6. LIFE LESSONS: "Need to be productive? Get in the bath."

    · 20 min · Bonus · Explicit

    Do you have a bath? Could you gain access to a bath if not? Mrs Whitehall says that if you need a to have a good think, you can't beat a nice hot soak. You can email your questions, thoughts or problems to…

  7. Goody Two Shoes, Stubbornness & Favourite Weird Smells

    · 45 min · S11 E6 · Explicit

    It's a packed one this week, DL's. The mail bag at Whitehall Towers was brimming with thoughts, feelings and stories, from class clowning, to an older gentleman who will NOT be told.... So it's not just Mr Whitehall.…

  8. LIFE LESSONS: "Give them the WRONG time..."

    · 20 min · Bonus · Explicit

    Do you deal with persistent latecomers? Mrs Whitehall has PLENTY of experience in this area with a certain someone who you might have heard of... You can email your questions, thoughts or problems to…

  9. Upgrades, Inheritance & Bearing A Grudge

    · 43 min · S11 E5 · Explicit

    Another week and another surfeit of emails, with a surprise guest out of the blue! How might you get an upgrade on a flight, do you hold any grudges and which TV show would you live in, if you had to? You can email…

  10. LIFE LESSONS: "Keep a spare key... Somewhere..."

    · 19 min · Bonus · Explicit

    This week, DL Joel has a right old tale to tell! What a situation he found himself in!! You can email your questions, thoughts or problems to TheWitteringWhitehalls@gmail.com Or, perhaps you'd like to send a WhatsApp…

  11. PJ's In Public, Spring Break & Housework Dancing

    · 46 min · S11 E4 · Explicit

    All DL's are going to have ideas about what makes a 'classic' WW's episode, but surely any time Mr Whitehall is bursting into song (more than once) has got to be a good bet? This week... A DL who wonders why people…

  12. LIFE LESSONS: "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth."

    · 29 min · Bonus · Explicit

    We've all heard Mrs Whitehall's tips on keeping this and that in the fridge to use again... A smidge of this and a dollop of that... Well, this week's DL has a Mother who does exactly that, but are the lengths she goes…

  13. Fasting, Fixing & Superstition

    · 46 min · S11 E3 · Explicit

    Do you ever sit and watch or listen to The Wittering Whitehalls, thinking "I wonder what, exactly, Mr Whitehall is reading at the moment." Has that ever cropped up? Whether it has or not, Mr Whitehall has taken it upon…

  14. LIFE LESSONS: “Break it down into manageable chunks.”

    · 26 min · Bonus · Explicit

    Every DL email (or WhatsApp!) that comes into the inbox is a treat and keeps the Whitehalls wittering, but sometimes a DL goes over and above with detail and effort… That’s exactly what DL Ray has done here. Fair play,…

  15. Bulldozing, Transparent Facilities & Red Trousers

    · 42 min · S11 E2 · Explicit

    You surely know them... The red trouser brigade? Maybe you're one of them! This week, a DL needs help with their presumptuous brother and the Whitehalls give their thoughts on a loo with a glass door. You can email…

  16. LIFE LESSONS: "Don't start too early..."

    · 24 min · Bonus · Explicit

    As we go through life, we're sometimes compelled to get shot of everything and start again... This week, a DL has questions about her Mother, who seems intent on giving everything away! You can email your questions,…

  17. Words of The Year, Madeira Mystery & Replaced by The Dog

    · 44 min · S11 E1 · Explicit

    Hopefully the wait wasn't too long... The Wittering Whitehalls are back on the airwaves and it's time to hit the ground running in 2026. A quick look back at the word of the year for 2025 and then it's off to Madeira…

  18. LIFE LESSONS: "Don't set yourself up to fail."

    · 25 min · Bonus · Explicit

    Having kept you company throughout the Christmas and New Year break, (if you got one, that is) Mr & Mrs Whitehall see out series 10 with some trademark advice. Worry not, however... They will be back on Monday 2nd…

  19. Grumpy Moments, Snipey Comments & Big Sit Down Chats

    · 46 min · S10 E15 · Explicit

    2025 was a big year in the land of The Wittering Whitehalls... A tour? Done and dusted? 10 series’?!! You'd better believe it. They'll keep coming too, because before long, Mr & Mrs Whitehall will return with series…

  20. LIFE LESSONS: "If in doubt, say nowt..."

    · 21 min · Bonus · Explicit

    HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM WHITEHALL TOWERS! Wishing you a prosperous, healthy and fulfilling 2026 and thank you for being a DL! For the first episode of the year, Mr & Mrs Whitehall have some advice for a DL who is about to…

  21. Nodes, Thrift & More Nodes

    · 44 min · S10 E14 · Explicit

    This week is, somehow, all about nodes... You'll find out why. In the post-Christmas but pre-new-year fog, Mr & Mrs Whitehall convene to shine a light into the year ahead. You can email your questions, thoughts or…

  22. Happy Christmas from Whitehall Towers!

    · 24 min · Bonus · Explicit

    What a treat! A Christmas Day special from Mr & Mrs Whitehall, straight from Whitehall Towers, to wherever you find yourself. Whatever you're doing and whether you have company or not, they're here! You can email your…

  23. Gliding, Skating & Christmassy Carpe Diem

    · 40 min · S10 E13 · Explicit

    Despite it being strongly against Mr Whitehall's wishes, this is a quite Christmas-heavy episode. 'Tis the season after all. Get ready for tinsel, mince pies, ice skating and sage advice for the time of year. You can…

  24. LIFE LESSONS: "Never trust a bannister."

    · 23 min · Bonus · Explicit

    This week, a DL shares plans for their 30th birthday party, to gauge whether it'll be a hit or not... The bottom line? Do what you want! It's your birthday!! You can email your questions, thoughts or problems to…

  25. BARELY ALIVE IN SALFORD: "I s*x your body now?"

    · 43 min · S10 E12 · Explicit

    In the final date of The Wittering Whitehalls: Barely Alive 2025 tour, Michael & Hilary played to a sold out crowd at Salford's Quays Theatre. It was a lovely way to end the tour (for now) and the emails, stories and…

  26. LIFE LESSONS: "We don't want AI art."

    · 23 min · Bonus · Explicit

    There's no doubting it... AI is here and it's only going to get bigger, in all of our lives. But what about the AI art scene? Is it a danger to real art? Almost certainly... We need to keep an eye on this! You can…

  27. BARELY ALIVE IN STOCKTON: "Chicken Parmo!?"

    · 45 min · S10 E11 · Explicit

    Back on the road, for the last couple of this particular tour - The Wittering Whitehalls found themselves in Stockton-on-Tees for a wonderful audience at The Globe. The questions are... "What's a chicken parmo?"…

  28. LIFE LESSONS: "Elf on the Shelf? Try this..."

    · 19 min · Bonus · Explicit

    This week's email comes from a DL who sounds less than enthusiastic about the magic of Elf-on-the-shelf... Naturally, Mr Whitehall agrees completely, but is there some advice from the other end of the sofa? Of course…

  29. Video Meetings, Honours & Trends

    · 43 min · S10 E10 · Explicit

    You might think Mr Whitehall is a man immune to following a trend... You'd be wrong! Plus, a strange online habit from a DL's boss and whether or not a knighthood changes someone... You can email your questions,…

  30. LIFE LESSONS: "Go heavy on your condiments."

    · 23 min · Bonus · Explicit

    Mrs Whitehall is full of life lessons this week, to make up for the weeks where she's concerned she didn't explicitly deliver any. No danger of that here... JOIN THE WITTERING WHITEHALLS FOR THEIR BARELY (A)LIVE TOUR:…

  31. BARELY ALIVE IN CREWE! "Absolute RUBBISH!"

    · 35 min · S10 E9 · Explicit

    As Mrs Whitehall is so keen to tell you, Crewe is a MAJOR junction in terms of rail travel in the UK... But they weren't just passing through. Mr & Mrs Whitehall took to the stage at The Lyceum for a wonderful evening…

  32. LIFE LESSONS: "There's CCTV everywhere..."

    · 20 min · Bonus · Explicit

    Whilst the subject of this weeks email isn't at all funny, there was at least a bit of light in the darkness of it all. Flashers are apparently still an issue in 2025 and one that Mrs Whitehall herself has encountered.…

  33. BARELY ALIVE IN BRADFORD: "HOW MUCH!?"

    · 42 min · S10 E8 · Explicit

    In the second visit to Yorkshire on this tour, Mr & Mrs Whitehall got right into this Saturday night show, with a fantastic crowd. Expect unfortunate misunderstandings with kindly neighbours, a bucket list trawl and…

  34. LIFE LESSONS: "Prolific is prolific."

    · 21 min · Bonus · Explicit

    It's not the first time Mr & Mrs Whitehall have been asked for podcast recommendations, but there are so many these days - it's tough to keep up! Plus, snack wars and whether or not you can describe a person and their…

  35. BARELY ALIVE IN BIRMINGHAM! "Extra large and extra hard..."

    · 40 min · S10 E7 · Explicit

    In the first of three nights of live shows on the bounce, Mr & Mrs Whitehall stopped off in bustling Birmingham for a rip-roaring evening. Expect awkward laughter in church, shocking revelations and BYOB! JOIN THE…

  36. LIFE LESSONS: "Take the stairs."

    · 24 min · Bonus · Explicit

    The Whitehalls returned from the Richmond Theatre, just down the road to Whitehall Towers; the shortest journey home yet! For this life lesson, a DL who is looking for a bit of energy from somewhere... But where to…

  37. BARELY ALIVE IN RICHMOND! "I think I'm in there..."

    · 47 min · S10 E6 · Explicit

    On to Richmond and what a fantastic audience they were... The Whitehalls met Charlie and glossed over whether or not he was old enough to be at the show, receive a thoughtful present from Diana and give Toby & Adam…

  38. LIFE LESSONS: "Play to your audience."

    · 24 min · Bonus · Explicit

    As the dust settles on another wonderful tour show, Mr & Mrs Whitehall are back at Whitehall Towers to consider a life lesson... All brought on by a brilliant story from DL's Bradley & Ellen! JOIN THE WITTERING…

  39. BARELY ALIVE IN GUILDFORD! "It's always AMERICANS."

    · 42 min · S10 E5 · Explicit

    The tour carried on without pause this week, to the Yvonne Arnaud Theatre in Guildford! Listen out for the moment Mr Whitehall commits fully to throwing the Americans under the bus... Only to realise there are a couple…

  40. LIFE LESSONS: "Sir will do."

    · 26 min · Bonus · Explicit

    After the DL's had left the auditorium and the long journey from York back to Whitehall Towers was complete, it was time to fire up the microphones once more for a debrief and a life lesson... So what was Krista going…

  41. BARELY ALIVE IN YORK! "We've finally done it!"

    · 42 min · S10 E4 · Explicit

    It's ALIVE! Finally, after years of saying it would happen, here are The Wittering Whitehalls LIVE in a theatre, in front of a real audience!! Recorded at The Grand Opera House in York, with a packed house of lovely…

  42. LIFE LESSONS: "If you're flying solo, don't wear the onesie."

    · 21 min · Bonus · Explicit

    Mr Whitehall's back is still bothering him, but it's not getting in the way of this weeks 'light' helping. A DL asks this week whether he was aware of Winston Churchill's love of a 'onesie'. What do you think? JOIN…

  43. Standing, Roaring & Discussions At The Dinner Table

    · 41 min · S10 E3 · Explicit

    Mr Whitehall is not at his physical best this week, following a mild back injury... That doesn't stop him from exercising his theatrical skills, though. It's worth a look, so why not try the full video episodes on…

  44. LIFE LESSONS: "It's not the 1950's any more."

    · 19 min · Bonus · Explicit

    An email from a DL all the way from Newfoundland this week! But should she come out of semi-retirement to do a fun job that gives her a break from house tasks? Her husband doesn't seem keen... JOIN THE WITTERING…

  45. Cybertrucks, WFH & The "Cotswolds"

    · 40 min · S10 E2 · Explicit

    Where are the Cotswolds? Well, Mr Whitehall has a pretty good idea of where ISN'T the Cotswolds... More on that later. Plus, the Cybertruck, more initialisms and the trouble with football commentators. JOIN THE…

  46. LIFE LESSONS: "Let them make their own mistakes!"

    · 19 min · Bonus · Explicit

    It's not easy dealing with kids, at ANY age and the Whitehalls know that plenty well enough. This week, a DL seeks advice over their son and his girlfriend... What's the best course of action?? JOIN THE WITTERING…

  47. The Annexe, Tired Winston & Spirit Animals Revisited

    · 43 min · S10 E1 · Explicit

    The Whitehalls are back to accompany you into the Autumn and there's no hanging about... This week, Mr Whitehall takes a very scientific, very in-depth quiz to determine his 'spirit animal' once and for all. JOIN THE…

  48. LIFE LESSONS: "Emojis might not mean what you think..."

    · 25 min · Bonus · Explicit

    It's time to test the emoji knowledge of two octogenarian men... Roll up, roll up! Mrs Whitehall, inspired by a curious DL, is going to quiz Michael and Neil to see whether they have any hope of decoding such a…

  49. Victoria Wood, Sitcoms & ASMR (with special guest Neil Stacy!)

    · 46 min · S9 E15 · Explicit

    What an absolute TREAT! We've all heard plenty from Uncle Neil over the years on The Wittering Whitehalls, but here he is for a FULL EPISODE! Hear all about his sitcom acting years, his favourite modern television and…

  50. LIFE LESSONS: "Couples who cook together... Are more than welcome to do so!"

    · 21 min · Bonus · Explicit

    This weeks email comes from a DL who's trying to reach a conclusion, but are they way off the mark? Plus... dog vomit, chives and delicious ice cream! JOIN THE WITTERING WHITEHALLS FOR THEIR BARELY (A)LIVE TOUR:…

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