Punch 1898-07-09: Vol 115 Iss 2974

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rT THE BEST NATURAL APERIENT WATER. 9 APEN LA *. Of all Chemists and Mineral Water Dealers, Prices 6d., is., and is. 3d. per boctle, SOLE IMPORTERS: _ THE APOLLINARIS Company, LIMITED, LONDON. of any description, will not be returned unless rapper. * e es * *. . Registered at the General Post Office as a Rewspaper. wines, or Envelope. PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY. PRICE THREE PENCE. = wt . aid Ly i Ne s\) " OS, . “4 Ne ep, 3 AN » Re: . me . "4 agpooensca Ae ‘a | wii eT ce ReneS * til ly Baa ACC ~~‘ i Ny ‘ 4, jin 1 NG ) weed J | eS! : WU a ins eS, 8 P Qe eve ¥ E b Vt Noell Gin : PUNCH OFFICE, 85, FLEET STREET, LONDON. For Cycles D UNLOP TYRE ae & - eae First in 1888 . . Foremost ever since. A HANDSOME ILLUSTRATED Boox eT, “Att AsouT DUNLOP TYRES,” POST FREE. OLDLDLD LD LDL I II I I ID a The DUNLOP PNEUMATIC TYRE CO., Ltd., 160 to 166, Clerkenwell Road, Léndon, B.C.

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a ~ ‘BAM WILDFIRE. Ss. 4 T By HELEN lr. BURLEIGH, 370, Oxford St., W. THE STANDARD. LIFE ASSURANCE CO. (%°) Head Office: EDINBURGH. Accumulated Fund, 84 Millions Stg. NEW REDUCED 4 RATES. RB) WITHOUT PROFITS. ~~ =| India and the Ce THE MOST NUTRITIOUS. EPPS'S CRATEFUL—COMFORTING COODA etl AWANSHANTI nies. Poasty Veorrasce. —_ fectily Harm- lew. Will re uce from two pounds eek, acta nm the food in stomach, te Chemists prt Send stamp for pam phiet. BOTANIC MEDICINE CO.,3, NEW OXFORD Sr., W.C. panes, en Foncée can be im > arted t i « ur by using ARINE Sold only by W WiNTin 472, Oxford St A Price 5s. 6d ‘ Por tinting grey or ‘ad « d Hair "RINE is invaluabie SMOKE THE CELEBRATED “PIONEER” SWEETENED TOBACCO KNOWN ALL OVER THE WORLD. MANUFACTURED BY THE RICHMOND CAVENDISH Co. Lro.,, AT THEIR BONDED WORKS, LIVERPOOL. And retail tobaccs dl by mists at home and abroad. (CCE, d's all first-class Plate Powder: NON MERCURIAL Universally admitted to be the Best and Safest Article for Silver, Electro-Plate, @c. SIX GOLD MEDALS. Sold everywhere, in Boxes, ls., 2s. 6d., and 4s, 6d, ———— P INCH, OR THE LONDON | CHARIVARL—Juty 9, 1898. “HE..VIEST POSSIBLE PLATING | eomtree’ | “ EMPEROR” CHOCOLATES. It has long been a matter of surprise, prior to the introduction of “ Emperor” Chocolates, that no English firm of standing and repute should have made a serious endeavour to rival the famous French makers in the delicacy and elegance of their confectionery. In “ Emperor” Chocolates the delicious | dainties of the Parisian Confiseurs are not only equalled but excelled. Their rare and exquisite flavour is appre- ciated by the most refined taste. Only the choicest Cocoas and the most deli- Vanilla are selected for their manufacture, the whole being skilfully blended by highly-trained Chocolatiers. The following varieties are now sold by most of the principal confectioners | throughout the kingdom, and to facili- |tate selection a special sample box containing a representative assortment will be forwarded by the manufac- turers, ROWNTREE & Co., Ltd., The ask FoR MAPPIN & WEBB’S PRINCE'S PLATE. (Reop.) “HIGHEST ATTAINABLE QUALITY.” ONEQU ALLED | POR HARD WEAR.” SAMUEL BROTHERS, | 65 & 67, LUDCATE HILL, LONDON, "Ee. cate roorztonm Dessert. Pistachios. | Langues de Chat. | Chocolate Almonds. | Créme a la Violette | “ Er Jacket and Vest for ‘hoy « 8 in., Ws. 94. Trouse’ 9s. 3d. | ILLUSTRATED CATALOGUE and | Nougat. Coffee. PA secininad ay s free on on application. — Pistachio Bonbons Assorted Manufactured b the makers of Rowntree’s ect Cocoa. OFFICIAL GOVERNMENT STATEMENT— ** Wherever the *] PASTEUR Chamern FILTER has been introduced TYPHOID FEVER HAS DISAPPEARED.” Sold Everywhere. Sole Makers : J. Defries & Sons, Limited, 147, Houndsditch, E.C. West-End Show Rooms: 3, Victoria Street, 8.W “PUNCH” is being set up every week by | LINOTYPE COMPOSING MACHINES. CELLULAR DRESS SHIRTS. HEALTHIEST anv BEST ror EVENING WEAR. | INustrated Price List of full range of Cellular | Goods for Mer, Women, and Children, sent | post free on application. OLIVER BROTHERS, Ltd., New Bond 8t., W. ae, 3 BROTHYRS, Led. 417 - yo “ w. OBERT SCO 4 and} ‘oult: . And Agents ir all Towns in the United ted Kingdom. See Price List for Names. COLT'’S NEW DOUBLE- ACTION 32 CAL. POCKET REVOLVER With Rjecto ith Rjector and Solid Frame, is the jates and Best Revolver made for Travellers am relists. It supersedes all others. COLT’S TARGET VOLVERS G @ RIFLES. Price Lists Free. COLT’S PATENT ., B, Glasshouse Street, Piccadilly Circus, London, W. Goin x Siver Cigarette eases manufactured by S.MordanxCe: the Ratentecs of the ever poiniled Pencil-case pet oon, We ‘rom all Gold XSilver smiths. Observe the makers mark § 4) | conjunclion with the London Hall mark &@ | } Cocoa Works, York, post free to any | address, on receipt of six penny stamps. Créme 4 la Rose. (4 Orient Cupey s Pleasure Cruises p“I tons Tegister, 3,912 For COPENHAGEN, WISBY, STOCK- HOLM, = PETERSBURG, BALTIC CAN AL, leaving London 17th August, For SICILY, CONST ANTINOPLE, the CRIMEA, GREEC E, MALTA, ALGIERS, &c., leaving London doth September, return- ing 8th November. String band, electric light, high-class cuisine. Managers, F. Green & Co., Anderson, Ander- son & Co. Head Office: Fenchurch Avenue. For passage apply to the latter firm at 5, Fen- church Avenue, London, E.C., or to the West End Branch Office, 16, Cockspur Street, 5.W. (£10, 10s, CRUISES om Sy. Qe, ? the | returning Tath September maut,” 3,254 tons, 4,000 horse-power, eon y Dr. LUNN and Mr. PEROW ay | ORWEGIAN FJORDS (12 days) A ROUND THE BRITISH ISL. Es (is ay Spt 6 au E (24 days) ST. PET ERSBU RO, STOCK- COPENH AGEN mad ‘CHRIST ANIA, on “St. Sunniva,” Aug 21 days) TAN ARY ISLES, TANGIER, GIBRALTAR and LISBON, on the 8.Y. “ Argonaut,” September 22nd. Pull details from the A paaeate 5, Endsleigh Castes, | Euston, keaton, WALSINGHAM HOUSE HOTEL AND RESTAURANT, PICCADILLY, W. THE MAGNIFICENT NEW RESTAURANT, with fame) Rooms, Private Dining Room, &c., exquisitely decorated, and pertect in every detail, wilt BE OPENED SHORTLY. The Table d Hote ia now open to non-residents. WALSINGHAM HOUSE occupies the most unique and central position in Fashionable London ROO! over look the celebrated Green Park, Piccadilly, and command a magnificent pastoral view, although in the heart of London TERRACE HOLM the 8 iG also attached to the Hotel. Each single Room and each Suite of Rooms pro- vided with a luxurious Bath Room. G. GELARDI, Manager. ‘Soren#, Loxpon. HOWARD'S PARQUET FLOORS From 3 “per foot. Finest quality produced. Solid Oak Wall Panelling from 2s. 6d. per foot. 25, 26, & 27, BERNERS STREET, W. DURING SUMMER You should never be without a bottle of ROWLAND’S KALYDOR, Which cools and refreshes the pao hands, removes Freckh Tan, Sun Redness, and Renshase, be als and caren, ca, Iritation, Eruptions. Bottles, 23 and 46. ROWLAND’S MACASSAR OIL, the most effectual er and restorer of the hair, as it does _ AskStores fair or golden not stain or darken the halror linen and Chemists for ROWLAND’S ARTICLES.

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with very illy, Jury 9, 1898.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL. ! THE MILLENIUM UP TO DATE. (‘The Rev. Mr. Baxter declares that religious — will require to be published as much as ever during the millenium.”— Daily News.] I wonpERED when I read it, And doubted if ’twere true, But Mr. B-xt-z said it, And Mr. B-xt-r knew. And so, with mixed emotions, I set to work and hum- bly altered all my notions Of the millenium. No longer in the City Men read the Star at lunch, They looked with hypercriti- cal eyes on Mr. Punch. They cared not for the Lincoln, Ascot unheeded 5 om . Neglected lay the Pink’un, e Sportsman lay The bookstalls at the stations Were thron with men who bent O’er pious publications With solemn looks intent. From Monday round to Monday, Still faster sold the stock Of Christian Herald, Sunday At Home, Church Times and Rock. The newsboys, little sinners, Repentant now, were seen, No longer bawili i But “ Parish Magazine!” ——I wondered when I read it, And doubted if ’twere true, But Mr. B-xt-z said it, And Mr. B-xr-z2 knew. SHAKSPEARE ON Mr, Jonn HARE IN THE Part oF MR. GoLprino#, “ What ‘a pair of spectacles’ is here!”’ Troilus and Cressida, Act IV., Sc. 4. A BALLADE OF CONCEALED ART. Ne vulgo narres te sudavisee ferendo carmina. WHEN you’ve pruned its edges frayed, Sifted chaff from wheat, And your sonnet now is made Tolerably neat ; Since the task is now complete, Though on thorny path Stumbled Pegasus’s feet, Tell it not in Gath. Of encyclopeedias laid Piled around your seat ; How you spurred your sorry jade To a well-feigned heat, asted paper—sheet on sheet, Ink—to fill a bath, With a manifold defeat— Tell it not in Gath. But your poem, with pride displayed Flowingly repeat, Sc shall Daphne, artless maid, You with plaudits greet ; Though your monumental feat Plaster be and lath, And your coin but counterfeit— Tell it not in Gath. Envoy. Punch, to whom we own the clieat, Spare your righteous wrath ! Don’t proclaim it in the street, Tell it not in Gath. A Financia AUTHORITY BADLY WANTED. —The man who can say “ Boyus” to the Investing Goose. VOL, OxXV,

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON —) ) Vi, if “ a® f Pie ad Pe. = ~s, Ne » ' a +) Se? | 2. “t * 4 : “i pts * am a eae Fe a bs ee THE MYSTERIOUS MINISTER. Lord S-l-sb-ry (‘‘spoken”). ‘No! Taere ’s No gettin’ at Me! I TELL you straicut, I keep Mysetr ro MysELr, AND NEVER SAYS NoTHIN’ To Nopopy, I pon’r; AND If ANYBODY VERY PRESS-INGLY WANTS TO KNOW —WuHy ”—(sings)—“‘ ‘I AIN'T AGOIN’ TO TELL,’”

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Juuy 9, 1898.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

The New Curate. ‘‘ SuPERB DAY, ISN'T IT?” Giles. Curate. ‘‘ ER—a—sUPERB——DAY !” Curate. “‘I ONLY REMARKED—ER—IT WAS A SUPERB DAY.” lt a hes Giles, ‘‘ Wnoa, Donsix !”

y, “Ze = ~ pales rege a % 1, M ” <= er —

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Giles. “‘ Ay? Tats Gw'ox, Dopsin!” Curate, ‘‘ Supers pay.” (Pulls up.) Giles, ‘‘ D——!

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE. Do you want a change from analytical novels and solutions of ay pe If you do, take the Baron’s advice, ask for Anna Kartnarine Green’s Lost Man’s Lane (PurNaM AnD Sons), and “see that you get it.” When you have got it, choose a quiet time, say a couple of hours to yourself, just before “ bye-bye,” if your nerves are in the very best condition; select a com- fortable corner, a shaded bright light, while the rest of the room is in darkness, and then and there the Baron leaves you to thoroughly enjoy one of the pleasantest, creepiest stories, in the crime-and-detective line, he has come across for some considerable time. The secret is weil kept up to the end, and the most ex- perienced of detective-minded readers will not find it the easiest thing in the world to get on the right. track. “ Briss, Sanps & Co.” are the publishers of Mr. J. Asupy- Sterry's latest up-to-datest story. A publishing firm rejoicing (and can they do anything else except rejoice?) in such a title ought to deal only with holiday literature, treating exclusively of the delights of the sea-side, of the pleasures of piers, of paddling, of building castles of sand, of digging holes, of lazing about doing nothing and assisting others in all the varieties of that qyetoctes pleasant occupation. “Buss, Sannps & Co.!” Visely did Mr. Asnsy-Srerry, the Laziest Minstrel that ever in- dolently twanged the lyre and filled the hearts of the Petticoats with delight, wisely did he select this Blissful firm as the chaperons of his Naughty Girl, who, of course, must be as “ Nice” as she is “Naughty.” But is she so very “naughty”? The reader must answer the question. The critic who has formed his idea of “naughtiness”” from a George-Mooreish novel, will most likely acquit Miss Beryl of the charge. “*Jack!’ said Beryt. “*Beryt!’ said Jack. “ And then the train went into a tunnel.” That is a quotation. Doesn’t it whet your appetite? What happened? Where was the tunnel? Was it on the L. C. & D. line, just running into Ramsgate and issuing sur la plage? _ If so, think of the publishers again, and there you have the sum-

—_ up, “ Bliss!” and in less than two minutes (ah, how all too brief is such happiness!) they are in the broad daylight in full view of “Sanps & Co.” ! Success to Asupy-STERRY-O a says his faithful admirer, Tue Baron ve B.-W. | a A TIP FOR THE TRIPPER. Dear Mr. Puncn,—I see that you have been giving advice “how to enjoy a short trip” in this (now) delightful weather. Let me give you my experience, The other day I had one of the pleasantest jaunts in my life. I will give it you from my note-book as jotted down in what may be termed “ Jinglese.” Started after breakfast. Absurdiy cheap return ticket; good for the entire season. No hurry. In first-class ‘ Pretty scene Kent beautiful. Smart run of an hour to Gravesend. No idea so much country en route. Train reaches pier. Steamboat in attendance. Not too crowded. Most re- spectable company. Fathers, mothers, and families. Efficient band. Good luncheon, Best part of the lower Thames. Even Southend picturesque. Short sea trip, then river again. Clac- ton charming. Harwich handsome. Felixstowe felicitous. Allite- ration suggestive of special articles of daily paper. After Felix- stowe the gem of the journey. An hour's delightful passage between banks of green turf and forest trees. Here and there a glimpse of ivy-covered towers. Country seats in the distance most impressive. Tea and oa. Return to deck; pretty scenery continued. And at 5.20, wich ! There, Mr. Punch. Take my advice ; you can ring the changes on the Belle Boats, where you need not feel ashamed to be Cavour Triprine.

“So Ruoprs is ‘a left-hand bowler of quite uncommon ability !’” quoted the old lady, as she read her Standard. “‘ He plays for Yorkshire.’ Well, it is very clever of him, but I always thought he would have to do something fresh for a living, after that Jameson Raid failed.”

Ovr friend Wacstarre has recently been suff from a sore throat. He was advised to paint it with iodine. Waa replied that he was not an artist, and even if he were, he wasn’t a Dutch artist, and was therefore unable even to attempt painting “ Phlegmish Interior.” “Tue Guitp or Brypers.”—Surely all the clergy licensed to join persons in holy matrimony ought, ez officio, to be members of this guild. They’re bound to be.

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL [Jury 9, 1898. ~ tes et SY Cy AAs aca ~ W ry x * : ai \y \ \\ \\ Nine AQ AN MAW A \ TINY \ \ \ 5 TRIALS OF THOMAS. A Souvenir oF THE Press Bazaar, [The Ladies’ Field, Strand Magazine, and Country Life had fancy leather goods and Persian kittens. } OPERATIC NOTES. How any one gifted even in the slightest degree with dramatic and artistic instincts could conscientiously appear as the heroine of La Traviata in a variety of costumes of the present “ so-called nineteenth century,” while all the other principels, and the chorus, are attired as ladies and gentlemen of the time of CHARLES THE Srcond, is just one of those things on the Operatic stage that “no fellow can understand.” It is intelligible that the male Opscorts choristers would not shine in suits of reach-me-down sables provided by the costumier as per contract, and that, in low-cut ball-dresses, the “giddy young things” of the “ spindle- side’ would not appear to the best advantage. reasons may he e satisfactory explanation of the fact that the Opera is not played in modern costume. But that Madame Metaa, hav- ing been made aware of this fact by the Operatic e@ manager, shoul! still cling to her modern fashionable attire, is incompre- hensible. If the stage manager did not inform her of it, then she must have been considerably surprised on finding herself in modern dress alone among the remnants of the sixteenth century. According to this, Madame Mexsa might play Nedda in Pagliacci, dressed as a fashionable London lady or as a Parisienne ; and on another occasion, JEAN pe Reszxe, following suit, might play Romeo in such a costume as he would don for a London a md party, all the other characters being in Veronese costumes, Man- tua-made, of the fourteenth century. But why complain? An edu- cated audience, representing most of the rank and fashion, and some of the talent, will put up with any absurdity on the Operatic stage, without uttering so much as a single ill-bred plebeian mur- mur. Sotto voce, and to one another, they smile ; but protest! not a bit of it. The effect of Madame Metaa, singing perfectly as Violetta, appearing in nineteenth-century costumes (beautiful too!) among the sixteenth-century ladies and gentlemen, is as absurd as if Sir Henny Irvine were to play Hamlet in a suit of sables of this present date, with craped “topper” and black gloves to match, while all the other actors were attired in costumes worn by the rank and fashion of Denmark at the period generally assigned to the action. M. Bonnarp isa very nice little Alfredo, poor young man! All doing excellently well, including Signor MANCINELLI, who brings out a new Opera this week, entitled, Hero and Leander, a little thing of his own. In this ra the Hero is a Heroine. Leander, the classical Professor of Swimming, suppose is to be Signor Sarezza. Success to the merry NELLI, and may his Opera, Leander-like, get on swimmingly, and, un-Leander-like, not me one of the “ submerged.” AT HENLEY AS IT IS. (By Isaac W alton Minimus.) THERE used to be buttercups once on these meads, There used to be reeds by the bank, But now these same meadows have not even weeds, And the water’s decidedly rank. The pastures are crowded with mannerless shows, And the river with refuse is blocked ; There isn’t a corner for quiet repose, While the nose is most constantly shocked! The houseboats and tents may with rich colour glow, And the course be more bright than before, But there isn’t the thought for the men who will row, As there was in the brave days of yore! How Wriian and Warre and stout “ Jounny” Moss Must recurrence of past time re-wish, And the sight be to them and to rowing a loss, But I only can think of the Fish ‘ Who are poisoned by garbage and bloated with food, And oppressed with the les o’erthrown ! My sentiments, though by the Many pooh-poohed, By the Few will be met with a moan! Rescce or Hampsteap Heatn.—Bravo, Mr. Tomas J. Barratt! You'll be Barratt-Knighted before you’re much older! He has secured for £38,500 “all that property” known as Golder’s Hill, in order to make of it a sweet preserve to suit the public taste, and thus to “rescue the charming landscape pic- ture from speculative builders of hideous flats.” A committee, under the ow of Sir Henry Harsen, has come to his aid. Good! Herr President. “ Sie Haben Recht!”

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Juty 9, 1898.] PUNCH, {;OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. THE SOCIAL WHIRL. (By One whe is in" it.) The following bright and “ ” littl hs ha e following bright and “ snapp ittle paragrap ve been specially written for Mr. Punch by a lady who assures him that she moves in the most select circles, and that the accuracy of her information may be absolutely de upon. Mr. Punch cannot say that he has the honour of being acquai with any of the personages whose dresses and doings are so minutely re- corded, but possibly some of his readers may be more fortunate and even if they are not, they will, he is sure, peruse this social chronicle with no less interest on that account. 7 "Hrerbods kn to make int of congregati verybody one knows seems a poin ng in Westbourne Grove these fine Summer mornings. Last Mon- day there were any number of pretty and distinguished people to be seen there. Little Mrs. Frocsweit (who is so often taken for the Honourable Mrs. Mooxow) was looking very sweet and distinguished in a plaid blouse with a collar of machine-made lace and a “ picture-hat.” Mrs. Pirxin was walking about with Mrs. Brass-Porr, and Mrs. Sruckxoz-Pre.z, in a costume of brick-red faced with cream, and a bent hat and parasol, was ex- amining a “line” of marvellously cheap gloves in Mr. Srrer- cHER’s shop window. Then Mrs. Gorremon, quite one of the prettiest women there, wore bright turquoise blue velvet, with a sash of pink tulle and a mauve toque. Mrs. BeweaTHer. looking regal in a ruby velvet hat and an ermine cloak, chaperoned Miss “Bary” Giecieswick in a little muslin-sprigged frock, much befrilled, which, though perhaps a little short, looked par- ticularly fresh and pretty. Miss Frump, who has a great name for neatness, looked wonderfully smart in a dust-coloured tussore silk, with drab linen collar and cuffs; Captain Corrsr, looking the picture of health, in a straw hat, frock coat, and brown boots, escorted Miss “Gussrz” Gorpiear, who was all in green gauze, and, unless I am mistaken, it. was pretty and sparkling Mrs. “Tom” Tryst who rode by on her “bike.” Altogether, quite a remarkable gathering of smart folk. A Smart Hic Tra. Mrs. Beuweatner’s High Tea, at Whiteley Terrace, on Tuesday afternoon, was perhaps the most brilliant’ affair of its kind that has transpired for years. All the best and smartest ople in Society were to be seen seated round Mrs. Be. weaTHER’s ospitable mahogany, and her well-known parlour was full to overflowing. Among the great ladies present were Mrs. Gorrrmon, gorgeous in green foulard, with serpent-like inser- tions, and a toque of sulphur-coloured tulle, with a pink aigrette ; Mrs. “Tom” Trnsett, a vision in cloth of gold and silver tissue ; and Mrs. Srvuckor-Pre.r, who came on from a Shakspeare Read- ing Society at Shepherd’s Bush, looking very sweet, but a little tired. Miss Griecteswick looked wonderfully well in tulle illu- sion. Mrs. Frocswert and Mrs. Brass-Porr both brought their girls, and Mr. “ Atr” Rowser, who looked in on his way from the City, brought his concertina. Mr. “Hers” Larkins and Captain Copper were expected, but were detained at Henley. After tea, which was quite excellent, there was a smal! and rather Bohemian party, one or two literary and artistic persons being present. The next day Mrs. Beuwratner had her dinner. An Interestinec Garpen Parry. Quite the smartest open-air function this season was Mrs. Samvugt SuHexyiy’s garden-party at Jordan Crescent, Maida Vale. Mrs. “Ixey” Soromons looked very up-to-date in a large check, and Mrs. Savi Snenre was splendid in plum-coloured Roman satin and gold passementerie. Mrs. Brt.wkaTHER, a8 usual, smothered in ermine, brought Mrs. Davi Rusensonn in grass-rreen and maize, with touches of orange in her toque. Miss Resecca Kosuerririscn, who always dresses with so much taste, came in crimson foulard with a vellow tulle sash and a hat of pale blue chiffon. A very charming and original feature of the afternoon was the institution of a sort of buffet under a tent, where lemonade, claret-cup, and even strawberrv and lemon- water ices could he obtained on application—a fashion which is certain to be followed at similar entertainings. Among the guests were Mr. ‘‘Mo” Leverton, Mr. “ Bensy” Isaacs, and several other smart men. [Parentuesis BY Mr. Ponca. Mr. Punch must candidly eonfess that he is rather at a loss to account for the change of tone in the s ing paragraph, in which the note of genial and almost reverent appreciation seems strangely lacking. Whether the accomplished chronicler has had any differences of opinion with her fashionable friends, whether she wearied of the monotony of unqualified praise, or whether she was simply out of temper at the time, it is not for \ i, Sal ) = fy, } A ti : , iW el! il \ 1 y) at | _ I uatilliy Ka 26; 5 La Old Gent. ‘‘Is tr A BoARD SoHOOL You Go TO, MY DEAR?” Child. ‘‘No, Str. I BELreve iT Be A Brick one!” Mr. Punch to say. He can only print his correspondent’s copy as it stands, and trust that it will not expose him to any actions for libel. A Dutt Dance. The general opinion about Mrs. Frogswei1’s dance at Busting Lodge, on Friday, seemed to be that it was an utter failure. To begin with, there were no programmes (making it impossible for a ner to remember which particular dance he was engaged for), and a hostess whose drawing-room is of the dimensions of Mrs. Frocswe.’s, should either not have the Green Hungarians at all, or else put them in the back garden. Not, however, that it signified, for the crowd was a very ordinary one, and the few people with any pretensions to smartness who came, only looked in for a few minutes. Perhaps it was the pale green paper shades over the gas-globes, which would have been try- ing toa em fg woman, but Mrs. Gorremon was looking quite ghastly, and I heard it remarked on all sides that she is a com- plete wreck this season. Mrs. Stuckor-Prews, who is beginning to have a worn look, brought her girl, but I did not see her dancing. Miss “Basy” Giccieswick seemed to be enjoying herself in the conservatory. After all, I suppose it is only con- sistent that people should “go on” as rapi Gi. they “go off.” Miss “ Gussiz ” Gotpiear looked almost girlish in the pink tulle which she always wears on such occasions. Mr. Rowser did his best to infuse some animation into the “Kitchen” quadrilles, and his diamond solitaire stud was the centre of such brilliancy and sparkle as there were. Mrs. “Tom” Trvseit danced several dances with Captain Correr, who is not at all well just now, and was certainly no better for having gone into supper three times. eo Sav a (the ee element 4, ra a ingly represented) positively shone at the supper-table, in spite of the fact that the champagne was none of the best. By some oversight, Mrs. Betweatner, who looked very warm and un- comfortable in black velvet, was not asked to go into supper— perhaps none of the young men present had the requisite cour- age. However, it may console her to know that she did not lose much. The dancing, like the floor, was wretched, and the early hour at which the of her guests departed must have con- vin even Mrs. Frooswei. that her social ambition had re- on in a deplorable fiasco. She is leaving town soon, for argate.

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [JuLy 9, 1898 Mr. Montgomerie. ‘‘ An! 18 SOMETHING MONSTROUS ! Tew pounp Nore ro esr ovr or ‘sw/” MY DEAR Boys, you RE KIGHT. Way, I CAN ASSURE YOU—THAT—AT SOME OF THE BIG Country Hovszs I stor AT, If COSTS ME A Jones (to his neighbour, sotto voce). *‘ WoNDER HOW MUCH IT CuSTS HIM TO @8T INTO ’EM?” a. Kh ly i] / / Il fy ! THE GOLDEN KEY.« THE EXTENT TO WHIca OUR, ENGLISH SysTEM oF ‘ TIPPING’ HAS GROWN NOTES FROM A STACE SHOOTINC-BOX. I ‘The theatre is one of my weapons.” —Speech f Withelm, Kaiser.) As great Apollo, lord of light and song, From whom the oracle was wont to flow, Used many arrows when he drew the long, Strong bow ; So I, his likeness, Whose revolving glance Takes all created Kosmos nicely in, And petrifies the powers of Ignorance And Sin— I, too, to supplement My royal frowns, Have weapons ready to My mailéd fist ; Of these the Army naturally crowns The list ; The Press (inspired), the Law, and other rul es Largely relating to lése-majesté : And last, and subtlest of My moral tools— Tre Pray! To this My lordly patronage I lend, Showing Mv subjects (at a trivial price) | The meed of Virtue and the awful end Of Vice. | When righteous work is done before their eyes, Dragons disabled, villains bound with cords, They deem it is their Karser occupies The boards! | |In Mea moral force directs the stage, Which adds, in turn, to My Imperial scope | When with the Prince of Darkness I engage To cope. am their hero, I their man of war, No matter under what disguises hid,— Siegfried, Othello, Agamemnon or The Cid. When from the flies My happy people trace | A god debouching in a tin machine, They like to fancy it is I Who grace The scene. Thus, like an arrow from the straining string For private ends I make the drama whizz! Hamlet was right: he said, “The play’s the thing” : All such, in fact, as love the Good and True It t is. Round the idea of Me delight to rally ; For this they even congregate to view The ballet. A Spanish Double-loon. As One Who wrote an Opera, I feel | Marsnat Branco has, according to a How good the ballet is for Prussian youth. | mogt circumstantial report, been fired on For thinnish are the veils that there conceal by a rebel and severely wounded. Ac- The Truth! | cording to onotinns most ectomeinatiet So, though Myself I play no active part, | report, he is in the enjoyment of perfect And though instinctively I hate a show, health. Evidently the Marshal should be : known in futuré as Double-Blanko, and go Fo this end fer wortal fente of Art in for dominoes to conceal his identity. And when My faithful mummers groan or. grin | “Miscettanzovs.”—Under this heading In tragic buskins or in comic socks, | the following advertisement appeared in Their single cyvnosure is W1L.1aM in | the Times of the 28th inst. :— His box. | “LIP LANGUAGE.—Will a Ledw whe wader | stands as above communicate with,” &e. They are My creatures whom I hold in fee, . And «till Mv nresence permeates the air, Curions advertisement for mere “lip- Though I shonld even happen not to be | service.” Has it anything to do with Just there! “Lint ’uns” ?

Page 9

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI—Jciy 9, 1898, OUR MASTERS’ MASTERS. Niwsrarer Hawker. “SHOUT AWAY, BILL! WE’RE SAFE ENOUGH AS LONG, AS WE. VOTES ‘PROGRESSIVE };'” (“ The chief reason for the rejection of the by-law” (for the repression of street shouting) ‘‘ seems to have been regard for the feelings of the Costers, who have made their power felt.” .. . . “There are many Londoners who will regret this decision.” — Westminster Gazette, June 29.)

Page 10

Page 11

Jury 9, 1898.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 9. ¥ ? “@, = 1 hv \ | | | i TRUTH WILL OUT. Miss Delamode (of Belgravia), ‘‘WxiL, DEAR, I MUST BE OFF, Don’t you Love Lorp’s?” Miss Dowdesley (of Far-West Kensingtonia). ‘‘I'm sure I sHovLp, =. (Immersed in her own dreams)—‘‘wk DON’T KNOW any!” MR. PEEPS’ DIARY AT HENLEY. Tuesday.—This day the aquatick contests at Henley, and I thither, though a great distance from Town. Paid a half-guinea to the varlet ged gat oe out the tickets, and sundry other monies for programme, which I understand but little, and for sport- ing papers, of which I comprehend even less. To the platform of departure at Paddington, the Company very numerous and in fine attire. Observe a couple of knaves get in to my railway coach, and as soon as the train start, commence playing of cards. Asked by them to adventure certain monies upon the orp card in a game where but three cards, in all, are used. Did 80, and at the first, did win a ound—called, methinks, a “ couter’ —and pocket the same. ut, continuing to play, did lose each time, until I owe them five pounds, at our journey’s end. Did give a banknote for Five Pounds, which, seeing a Police In- spector approach, one of the varlets did hastily Pocket and hurry away. Did feel glad to see the last of such Sorry Rogues, and made a Resolution to avoid any further intercourse with the fellows. To the River, where great To-do of Flags, and Barges gaily decorated. Did walk through the gates on to the fine awn, when the Guardian was Not Looking, and did Ruffle it, with the Best. Comes a Policeman, who, seizing me by the collar, puts me outside again. Much diverted by the numerous small Craft upon the River, but wishing for a more Compleat view of the Racing, presently manage to Again slip in through the gates and nearly to the lawn once more, but just caught by the tail of my fine new coat, and Hauled Outside yet again by the same Policeman—a churlish fellow, but Persevering withal. Lord! to see how chi are times, since, in mine own heyday, the Watermen of Wapping Old Stairs did contest for a Coat and Badge, challenging the Watermen of London Bridge. Me- thinks ’twas finer sport, though far less of show and ~~ ie ing of the great sony which I now reeive are dubbed “ House-Boats.” Many minstrels, their faces blackened, and twanging Ban-Joes, as they call them, but to me more like a Warming-Pan with musickal strings. Good Lack! What strange dress they did assume, and collars all too large and not of any fit whatsoever. Did offer a knave four-pence for a seat in his wherry, as I would have adventured up on the River, but he make merry at my expense, and pase his Thumb unto his Nose and spread out his rs lengthwise, and was otherwise disrespeckt- ful and Unseemly in his Conduct. Espying my Lord of Corxer- Ton Very Busy with a Hamper, did accost him in friendly tones with An Eye upon his 8 ling Wine. But he, continuing to consume his Toothsome Viands, did offer me none of his hospi- talitie. Whereupon, waking his Lordship a Change of Climate (though the day was Not Cold), I left him. Witnessed sundry of the boat-races, and was much diverted at sight of a strip of wood and canvas, which they call An Outrigger. Lord! to think that any man would adventure his life in such a whimsical thing! and not at all to compare with the honest Waterman’s Wherry of mine own time. But, in one thing, was well pleased; the ladies, though no longer Sighing and Ogling, much comelier in dress than of yore. But in all else, disappointed. And so back to London, and thence, ere Cockcrow, to the mystic shades again. SILOMO’S WARNING. Wizard. Srt0omo, S1romo! beware of the day When thy ee ey ’s driven to bay! For a cloud of mity darkens my sight And thine England lies low in oblivious night. Thine office is closed, and thy secrets are wrung From thine innermost bosom, and ruthlessly fluug To the ravenous people, and lo! the whole nation Gloata greedily over the black revelation! Silomo. False wizard, avaunt! I have marshalled my staff. They are old, far too old, to be caught with thy chaff. In vain, ’tis in vain that thy warnings are muttered. They well know the side that their bread has been buttered. Wizard. Ha! Laugh’st thou, Stiomo, my vision to scorn P Proud Member for Sheffield, thy pride shall be torn, For look! Who is yonder? I see her e’en now, The light’ning in eye and the thunder on brow. Her glance is destruction—it falleth on thee !— Ah! mercy, dispel the dread vision I see !— Thou tremblest, thou palest—thou fall’st to the plain— Thou writhest about in thine impotent pain,— I see thee, Sttomo!—Thy glories are fled, A heap of mere ashes, all shrivelled and dead With the wrath of the duchess thou daredst to diddle— Silomo. Down, soothless insulter! I trust not thy riddle. What! Think’st thou the cheek of Sttomo will blench,— Sriomo, the dread of the Treasury Bench,— Sriomo, the hero of war as of peace, That dared, all undaunted, the dungeons of Greece P What! think’st that Srromo will tremble and fly From a duchess, a feminine duchess’s eye ? So long as the Suan sits firm on his throne, So long shall the name of Stromo be known, So long shall, bareheaded, the land of his birth Bow down to the friend of God’s Shadow on Earth. On Operatic Lixes.—Beturni’s Norma is a work seldom given nowadays. It might be well cast just now at the Theatre Royal Victoria and Charing Cross, with the Chairman of the L. C. & D Railway as Norma, and the Chairman of the 8. E. Railway as her former rival, Adalgisa, singing the well-known duet, “ Yes, we together!” The duet, with a good translation vid Calais and Boulogne, ought to highly popular and a big success. Bien oui! ma Share de Préférence !—and plenty of ’em Peace-Worx.—Refused—it is hoped only for the present—in Spain and America.

Page 12

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[Jucy 9, 1898.

HARD LABOUR. Miss DoRA ALWAYS KEEPS UP A SHARP CANTER DURING HER Mornina Ripe. SAYS THE VIOLENT EXERCISE 18 GOOD FOR HER GROOM, PRINTABLE ! SHE WHat THE GROOM SAYS IS UN-

DARBY JONES LAMENTS ON THE EXTINCTION OF STOCKBRIDGE. Honovrep Str,—This week must be one of Mourning in Racing Circles for Stock- | bridge, that most delightful of Hampshi meetings—the only pne left, in so far as | I can remember, in the whole of the County over which the Right Hon. the | Earl of Nortaproox rules as Lord Lieu- tenant—which, after vainly battling against | the Breeze of Gate-Money Gatherings, has at last succumbed, and, as Sir Fraser Punnett would say, is “ Buy-buried.” It is not for My Humble Self to analyse the various motives which have influenced those responsible for the Cremation of the | |}and Virtuous, “I am v Bibury Club and the Stockbridge Com- mittee, and the transference of their Ashes, in hope of Phosnix-like Resurrec- tion, to the Bleak Downs which overlook the Palatial Demesne of Lord Pemproxe at Wilton and the Unique Spire of Salisbury Cathedral. I can o say, like the Little Girls in the Good Fiction written for the Edification of the Young sorry.” From the days of the Prince- ent down to this End-of-the-Century Conviviality, the Bibury Club has been sgeLect, and Stock- bridge has conduced to its Selectiveness. The Associated Forces may migrate to Salisbury, but it will, in my feeble esti- mation, be no longer the Dual Gathering as

celebrated in many a Tradition of the Past. Stockbridge, ted by Lord Duc and other far-famed Anglian A rs for taking Attributes with the Waltonian fly, is a remote from the cognisance of the Vv r Herd, the coarse cries of the Cos- mopolitan Backer and Booky. It was a Nook reserved for the Cream of the Racing World, not for the Skim Milk of the comnery Churners of the Course. The stakes have never been of Brobdin ian Amount, but nevertheless = eroes of the Turf have there prov their Inci- pient Value. Let me only cite the splendid Galtee More, who, but two years back, gave early evidence of victories in store, and rejoicing in the Castles of Gubbins. It was at Stockbridge that I first made acquaintance with the noble Captain Kri- TeRION. He had just experienced some unpleasantness at the Jubbah-Nuggah Meeting in India. where, his horse having won the Rajah’s Vase contrary to orders, he had fallen down in a fit, and had after- wards to send in his papers to an unre- lenting Colonel. Disregarding the cruel slander passed upon his Unblemished Re- poe by sundry Pharisees, I greeted im the same evening with such unmistake- able sympathy for his Misfortunes, at the White Hart Hotel, Salisbury, that his Local Traducers were put to as complete silence as though they were under cross- examination by Sir Epwarp Ciarke, the Attorney-General, or Mr. C. F. Gri. Since then we have never parted in every sense of the expression. It was at Stockbridge, moreover, that I subsequently had occasion to abruptly leave the course for Winchester, owing to an Unaccountable Attack made upon me by a Low Fellow, with whom I had had some Financial dealings at Newmarket. It was at Stockbridge. also, that I lost —no, Sir, not my Shekels, but my Heart, to one who——- But why dissolve my Pearly Sorrows in the Vinegar of the World? Suffice it to sav, that in losing Stockbridge I lose a time-honoured Friend —a High-toned Countrv Gentleman, with whom none of us can afford to say “ Good- bye.” At this, his Interment, I venture to deliver myself of some line< calculated to permit you and other Munificent Mag- nates to expend a few Shekels on Flowers and Wreaths wherewithal to encircle his tomb. As the saddened, but by no means defunctory, Swan, I sing of the Cup :— In Seretched Muscovite some may believe, For Petitioner others declare, Double- Berry can only deceive If Count Collivs should chance to be there. Occidental T hold in respect, The Bailiff may go in the straight, But [ilfavoured ’s the one T exnect That will not give the Rooster-slain weight, While Hercloudon 1 sha’! not neglect For a “shop” if the runners be eight! The Cakes and Ale are ready for you, though we stroll for the last time by the quaint little Stand, Doll-land boxes, and Noah’s-Ark Paddock. Trusting that, de- spite the defeat of Velasquez, you did not neglect my second as Goletta, and that Rothschildian good luck attended you, I am, honoured Sir, Yours devotedly, Darsy JONES. P.S.—I chanced across Sir FRaiser Punnett, since writing the above, in Pall Mall this evening. To him I mentioned my departure for Stockbridge, and he jo- cosely remarked, “‘ Ah! yes; meeting going to Salisbury. Should be called next year Stock-Exchange-Bridge.”

Page 13

Jury 9, 1898.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL. PROGRESS OF THE WAR. Scene—A Sanctum. Time—-The near past. Editor. Sure you have given it sufficient prominence ? Sub. Think so, Sir. We have got three leaders, two special articles, and six columns of wires. Ed. Good. How about “contents bill” ? Sub. Devoted the entire bill to it. Ed. Right. Start the machine. Scune—The same. Time—A week later. Ed. Sure you have forgotten nothing? Sub. Think not, Sir. ders of varied interest. Special articles of home interest, and the customary columns of wires. Ed. Good. By the way, got anything in about the war? Sub. Yes, Sir. A five-line paragra Ed. Any room for it in “ contents bi Sub. No, Sir; crowded out. Ed. Right. Start the machine. (Rights reserved for wnanticipated developments. ) ” ? Tae New R.A. aR-RAY-’D IN ALL HIs Gory !— Congratulations to Mr. Epwrx Assry, Royal Academician. The Chaplain of the Burlington House Brotherh will rejoice in having so clever and so hard- working an Abbé to assist him in his arduous duties. When any “Brother Brush ” possesses the talent of this artist then, whether R.A. or not, he may well say to himself, ‘“‘What’s the odds as long as you’re Abbey?” ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT. Exrractep rrom THE Diary or Tony, M.P. House of Commons, Monday, June 27.— “Tf you only know how, it is,” says Sarx, “avery easy thing to govern a free ple. Take to-night, for example. Consider the osition of that blameless character, Sr. Micuak, whose association with All Angels is more than nominal. When, in 1896, Soudan expedition decided upon, Govern- ment were in a tight place. Memories of the Sad Soudan did not endear district to British mind, nor were they calculated to make popular a fresh foray. If on top of these considerations came prospect of large expenditure, Joun Buti would eut up rough. Accordingly St. MicnagL, in capacity of Chancellor of Exchequer, was = up to say that the war wouldn’t cost England a penny. Egypt would find the men and find the money too. “That statement, coming in middle of debate that was growing serious, acted with marvellous effect. War is wicked, we all felt. Butif it can be carried on at other people’s expense, with advantages mainly accruing to us—well, we mustn’t be cen- sorious. Who are we to set up to be better than our brethren? Henry Fow.er dis- turbed pleasantness of the moment by more an hinting that this was all humbug; that in the end England would have to pay. He was hustled aside, and Ministers triumphantly carried the day. “A year later it was found that a trifling expense of £800,000 had been incurred for campaign. Egypt couldn’t pay. ‘Then we must,’ said the British taxpayer, wearily. ‘Not at all,’ said St. Micnagt (and you might almost hear the rustle of the angels’ wings). ‘We’ll grant ’em a loan, dear boy. Leave it all to me, and I’ll make an honest penny for British Exchequer out of difference in interest between what we Wretched-looking Messenger. “Bra PARDON, Mk. Brown, IT'S COME AT LARST! | My Wirk 5 BEEN AND GOT A SEPARATION OxpeRr! ENTIRELY DEPENDENT ON MYSELF. can raise the loan at and what we shall | charge Egypt.’ “Never was there such a far-sesing | Minister, such a clever Chancellor of the Exchequer. Loan approved by rattling majority. Another year passed, as they say in novels. Here we are to-night with Egypt again to the fore; three-quarters | of a million sterling wanted for Soudan war expenses. Must be immediately forth- coming, or somebody will be sold up. What shall we do? “Sr. Micuart equal to this, as to earlier emergencies. ‘What shall we do?’ he says, smiling round Committee of Ways and Means. ‘Why, call the loan a gift. | It was a pound or two under £800,000; Egypt wants £750,000. By this fy = device, you see, we not only provide for Egypt’s immediate liabilities, but set her up with £50,000 to be going on with. Instead of making a loss, you really have £50,000 to the good.’ : “Committee gasps with pleased ae. Squire or Matwoop, posing as ‘a finan- cial prude,’ says something about unsound finance ; but there’s no mistake about the | £50,000. Oh, beneficent Government! Oh, | Sainted Chancellor of the Exchequer!” “Then I sunpose,” I said, “the British taxpayer won’t have to y anything? This is not supplementary to the landlord

Page 14

12 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL [Juty 9, 1898.

relief and the subsidy of Church Schools, which Joun o’ Gonst says are no good?” The Member for Sark winked. Business done.—Make Egypt a present of £790,000. Tuesday.—Final bout in the Benefices Bill Stakes between Squire or MaLwoop and Paince Artraur. The Squire in subdued mood, but fighting hard for his | corner. Plants some neat blows in the | neighbourhood of bread-basket of the | “men who eat the bread of one Church with the object of betraying it to another.” (Of course, it was the Church that was to be betrayed, not the bread. That a detail easily understood.) The Squire a little weighed down with the iniquity of man. He has not only been misrepresenting the Squire's sayings and doings in connection with this Bill, but has been “ playing Pigott” with the Seuire’s honoured name, signing it to cunningly devised fables sent to the newspapers. Characteristic of native simplicity of Seurre that he provides RepmMonp cadet with opportunity of advertising himself as champion of a Church that no one has attacked Cadet wrote a letter to Times denouncing Squire for insulting Catholic Church. Times, which no longer loves “ Historicus,” not only gave advertisement free insertion, but used it to found attack on the blameless Seurrz. Now Repmonp cadet rises to explain that when he laid a definite charge at Squire’s door, he didn’t mean him at all, but had Sam SmirH in his mind! This comes of new arrangement for Leadership of Liberal Party. Not yet

“Tam a Financial Prude.” Sir W. H-re-rt’s Speech, June 27. wn accustomed to Samvet’s high estate, Members, especially if a little prone to muddle-mindedness, when they consider the doings of the Leader of the Opposition, commander, and buffet the Squire for the laily comely. Would like to know his private ill-doing of Sam. views on the Benefices Bill ; on Tea on the Business done.— Benefices Bill read a} Terrace; on the actual value to the British third time without a division. Thursday.—Car’en Tommy Bowes nar- rowly escaped being put in irons, an ex-| perience peculiarly painful for one of

A Case of “ Conviction” ; or, Wigs on the Green! Mr. E. C-rs-n, Q.C. his war-worn frame. As a rule, he is a model of discipline, a shining ex- ample of all a citizen should be, re- spectful to the Port Admiral, courteous to the ship’s cook. Fancy a usually serene temper was ruffled to-day by discovery on reaching the Westminster Dock that his old moorings above gangway were again <i a by piratical craft. In the absence of that fine clipper the Jemmy Lowther (gone on a cruise to Newmarket), the Cap’gn got his berth, a real good one. Still, he was riled, and the Port Admiral firing a shot across his bows when he at- or gg a foul, he showed his gnarled old te ° Fleet looked on in alarm as the Cap’EN answered shot for shot. “You have not heard me,” he shouted, when Chairman ot Committees demurr to his moving amendments taking precedence of Members who had put theirs on the paper. “I have heard you,” said Chairman, emphatically. “No, Sir, you have not,” came the sharp reply. Duel went on for some anxious moments. Chairman evidently not to be trifled with. Another moment and the Capr’en would be named and suspended from the yard- arm for the remainder of the sitting. Crisis avoided by Chairman calling on amendment next in order. So storm blew itself out ; nobody wrecked. Business done.— Evidence in Criminal Cases Bill passed through Committee. Friday.—Sarxk much interested to hear that Billy, the Spsaxer’s bull-dog, is sitting for his portrait for the National Gallery. A most remarkable dog Billy, an honour to my race. Generally in a state

mix up the late incumbent with the new of profound meditation varied by occa- sional glances at any passing calf particu- | Empire of Wei-Hai-Wei ; on the suspension of the Twelve o’Clock Rule; on the exact whereabouts of the Committee of Council on Education; and on Mr. Gepor. Sark once met Billy at a country house, and had opportunities for close observa- tion. The floor of the hall was highly polished, a circumstance that led to evi- dence of temporary but deplorable short- ness of temper on the part of Billy. On leaving the dining-room after dinner and attempting to cross this glassy surface, Billy’s almost elephantine tedy was too mab for his legs. He rolled and slipped at every pace, his face betokening the m a annoyance, whilst from his ponderous jaws came a muttered noise uncommonly like preternaturally awful swearing. Billy does not approve his muzzle, and if his start for his daily stroll in the Park happens to be timed to the hour of the meeting of the House, Water Lone likes to reach his room by the House of Lords entrance. This saves crossing Palace Yard, and is, the President of the Board of Agri- culture says, not much out of the way. Business done.——Scotch Estimates Committee. in

Morat From THe University Maton at Lorp’s.—Says the Times report, “ Except for the difficult chance at thirty-five he was not missed,” &c., &c. A sad reflection for the kindly moralist! Except for that “ difficult chance at thirty-five,” a time of life when the chance is probably the last one, how many go out of the game, dis- appear altogether, and “are not missed!” arpe diem!

«, BERLIN!” Mapame SARA IN HER NEW CHARACTER OF ‘Frau Frau,”

(‘Madame Sana Barnnxanpt has at last con- sented to go to Berlin.” —Daily Paper.)

Page 15

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PUNCH, UR THE LONDON CHARIVARL—Juty 9, lsys. = —_ —- ) lr TOUCHES THE CHEEK OF BEAUTY SO GENTLY THAT YOUTH LINGERS ON THE FACE OF AGE y PES AND AGEITSELF-L@KS YOUTH Pears’ iscmatchfess for the complexion } 4 . Lf -_ No . \ ih Stuart of Middlesex, at the Offices of Mesers. of I Road, Holloway, in the Parish of St. , Iettagten, in the Bradbury, ia e Precinct of WhitefHare th the Uity of Lowioe, amd published by thm at ‘0, 85, Fleet City of London —Sarvuapay