Punch 1891-01-03: Vol 100 Iss 2582

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The 3rd No., Price One Shilling, of SOCIETY PICTURES. By George du Maurier. The Complete Edition, Price 5/-, of F. C. Burnand’s A her THOUGHTS. Illustrated. —S = ed —— — 7 Be H! ai Gi hh a Dy “BONSd 33¥HL B0IUd y. N°” 2582. VOLUME PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY. ONE HUNDRED. —+e JANUARY 3, — aay 85, FLEET STREET. AND SOLD BY ALL BOOKSELLERS. BOTTLED AT THE SPRINGS. Schweppe's Sparkling Malvern Sin Henry THompson :—* No water exists in any natural sources than that of our own Malvern Spri

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON _CHARIVARLI —Janvary 3, 1891. Vee HERALD THE STANDARD LIFE ASSURANCE COMPANY ~~ 5 Bi Ne ESTABLISEED 1825. Accumulated Fund, ‘7 Millions Stg, FOR PROTECTION LNIWLSIANI P EDINBURGH, 58 George 8t (Heed Office) LONDON, 63 King William Street, B.C. - ® Pall Mall Bast, 6.w. “EXCELLENT—of Great Value.”—Zanod, June 15, 1889, CONCENTRATED Gold Medals, 1884, 1886. =| PEPTONIZED seman cave = COCOA ann MILK WEAK DICESTIONS. DELICIOUS. Tins, ls. 6d. and 2s. 6d., obtainable everywhere. DICESTIBLE. SAVORY & MOORE, LONDON. WORTH et CIE. (UNDER ROYAL PATRONAGE, ) CORSETIERES. 134, NEW BOND STREET, W. aS SCENTS| LIGN-ALOE. OPOPONAX FRANGIPANNI. PSIDIUM / DUBLIN, 66 Upper Sackville Street. Branches & Agencies tn India & the Colonies THE BEAUTY OF THE SKIN ENHANCED BY OXFORD.-MITRE HOTEL. ONE OF THE MOST ECONOMICAL FIRST-CLASS HOTELS IN THE KINGDOM. rquisitely cho ~~ —y ~~ BOURNEMOUTH. Seserercas* ROYAL BATH HOTEL, BEWLAY & CO. Ld, of Wales. Groun rin! "1000 ioet wen «frontage Due Sean 49 and 74, Strand, W.C., and 143, Cheaside, 2.6, ensed Patablish- Agents for Great Britain FLOR DE JAVA ILD INDI rane _ Ie ans ae CAUTIO ms “EAST c Livre LONDON, ENG. ae MAPPIN & WEBB'S FINEST SITUATION. EVERY LUXURY ano COMFORT. mMosT RECHERCHE TABLE KNIVES. POUDRE D’ AMOUR (Prepared by > Pesacs. Parfumeurs). a Seles Poeaer rr Sasttylag and gotrn osmetic, for beautify as ont 4 soft Stim. it wil | be equally weico & most natural fraiche — 4 the . che for fetr skins, Natureiie for darker vom plenvons, and Rachel for use by artifes ht Price la. Wy Post, free from observation, le 34 To be had of al! Hairdressers, Chemists, &c Wholesale Depot: B. ROVENDEN & SONG, sie), BEMNERS STREET, W And 61-05, CITY ROAD, B.C, LONDON ? TABLE WATERS. TIRELY WITH NATURAL CAS. tout, Rheumatism, and Indigestion. ially well with Wines, pirits, or Milk. ut an agry bever mae ble health - promoting T ALL FIRST-CLASS HOTELS ‘DPD RESTAURANTS 2 pints, 18/6, including bottles. W mo esate Sroanse— NIS SPRINGS, Ltd., tte, WHARF ROAD, CITY ROAD, LONDON. LIQUEUR OF THE | c CHARTREUSE. .. 1. sow Ste pe, weit coma. ofa & igeetion now be cigs ater cadbrably eae ‘prite than . le Consig nee, W. DOYLE, B, G wtohes Prt pn nA _ORMISTON & CLASS, EDINBURCH. | ““WANNIS” & CUISINE. VERY MODERATE a TARIFF. CAMEL FOUNTAIN PENS. A Whole Letter with One Dip. LONDON LIFE ASSOCIATION. ASSURANCE FUND, FOUR MILLIONS. MUTUAL ASSURANCE AT LEAST COST. No. 81, King William Street, E.C. “lw —I > for all my drawings on paper or woo! and you anes’ pons ns are the best le per handled —Lesier b —— — In One Shilling Boxes. Of all Stationers or MACASSAR OIL Nourishes and Preserves the Hair, | i makes it Soft and Silky, and is the BRILLIANTINE being not too greasy or drying ; speci- CELEBRATED Hair; bottles, 3s. 6d.; 7%.; 10s, 6d, FODONTO Pree ocas, Sweetens the Breath. Sid everywhere. Noro paral COLLINSON & LOCK’S CELEBRATED : SILKS, BROCADES, ano TAPESTRIES, maprentont, Mnctvan OF THE FINE A MATERIALS, AND AT PRICES TO MEET ALL REQUIREMENTS. to 80, OXFORD STREET, 76 Ww. TRELOAR'S CARPETS OF EXTRA QUALITY. SEAMLESS BRUSSELS CARPETS. Special in Design, Colouring, and Quality. TRELOAR and SONS, LUDGATE HILL. SEAMLESS AXMINSTER CARPETS, Of Special Extra Quality and Thick Pile. TRELOAR and SONS. WILTON ano SAXONY CARPETS, In all Colourings, at Special Prices. TRELOAR and SONS. TURKEY, PERSIAN, ano INDIAN CARPETS, All Bizes. Wholesale Pric’s. Quotations, free, for any Size. Importers, TRELOAR'S MATS, WITH NAMES, CRESTS, MOTTOES, ally suited for Ladies’ and Children’s & | OR MONOGRAMS. Made of Unbleached Coco Nut Fibre, the only sort to wear well. Eveven Patze Mepaus. THE CHEVIOT. AN ENGLISH CARPET FOR A GUINEA, Size—3 yards by 2jrd yards. All Wool, Seamless, Bordered, and Fringed. Made in Forty other Sizes, TRELOAR and SONS, LUDGATE HILL. TRELOAR’S CARPETS OF EXTRA QUALITY. os

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—_— HARIVARL PUNCH, OR THE LONDON C Jasvary 3, 1891.]

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Tek eee PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARLI. [January 3, 1891. TO-DAY’S AMUSEMENTS. As they will probably be advertised in the Press of the day after to-morrow. ) Execotiow oy rae Littte Peptiuscton Mcxperen.—Reserved gallows seats, immediately behind the . view of the dying struggles, with chance last confession ; Lady’s ticket TwoGuineas. Lady and Gentleman’s, ditto, three guineas. (8°30 a.m.) Tata at Tae Ocp Barer or La Batre Isanecze, the husband- poisoner. Last day of trial, summing-up of the Judge, intense excitement. A few oa tickets at Ten Guineas still obtainable | (including “snack” luncheon and use of opera-glasses), and com- | mensins front yer of the X when comming-Up, close om of the prisoner's facial y during the passing sentence, Xe. | (11. a.m. Ladies advised to be in their places not later than 10 30) Gaeat Lerexwationat Caimes Exursrrion at Baotia.—Addi- tional Attractions. Portrait groups in wax, life-size, of all great criminals from Carn to Caanies Peace; Lecture on Capital Punishments in all Ages, with illustrations and demonstra- tions (3 p.m. and 7 p.m.) Old Newgate. Mediwval Torture Chamber in full work. Grand Execution Tableaux, in the grounds ; realistic renderings of punishments infli on Kavartzrac, Damiens, &c., &c, (3 o'clock and 6°30.) Avuto-da- Fé at 2°30 and 7. Admission One Shilling. Children under eight half-price. Ladies’ Reserved Seats (inclusive of all Shows) One Guinea, Open 10 Aw 1 (Thirty Pes persons, ¢ ies, passed the turnstiles last Wedneslay.) Posie Vivisecrion Demon- of STRATION AT THE SENSATIONAL b: Zs Suneicat Socretr’s Roome.— ‘ome Exhibition of the droll effects of Curari upon — subjects under the knife, - and the actual cautery. No annoying noise, or struggles! Bout Fient at THE Argcapuaw Hatt.—Fall Spanish Programme this day. Absolutely no re- ‘ strictions! Serious ac- cidents daily! Two Toreadors killed last week, and seven seri- ously injured. No de- ception! Extra fierce bulls to-day, and con- sequent — of HiegLr ENSATIONAL Scenes IN THE Anena!!! Admission, le. to £5 Se. Specially Reserved Front eats for jes, £7 7s, (3 P.M., THE HERO'S COMMON-FORM DIARY. January.—Leisurely return to England. Enthusiastic reception en route, February.—Greeted by Mayor and Corporation with an address at clear Dome. Triumphant progress to arch.—Imposing scene at the Guildhall. Acceptance of the me. Freedom of the City. April.— Visits to the provinces. Loud cheers side, un- y, and ‘ay.— the imi Sm Me London Season, Hun- dreds of nightly invita- tions. stration at the Lord Mayor’sShow. Charges recrimination. irst- rate A 1, go-as-you- a Merry a Happy New Year. HOLIDAY TASKS FOR THE NEW YEAR. Emperor of R-ss-a. visit and 8°30.) “ LITERARY. STARS.” Shi eels Impexiat Paowograrnic Socrery, Hatt or Horrors.—Phono- graphic Keproducti i and Confessions of ae and Hysterical of P under trial ‘Women realistic Half a Guinea. (8 P.m.) Pornwoexzaraic Art Gatteries.—Now open daily. by private card only. Illustrated Catalogue (purchase comp ), Two Guineas. i copies includi duction ures in i Sanctum, £10 10s, (10 till 4 Guovt Taxatae.— Society B and the B The Demon o ! Btrongly i Five Acts, a Special th Dance Tableau!!! The T is Rae a th ! ity Open at 7 30. Moving in Society at 9 ! Great Toilet Scene at 9 30! The Blood-Bath at 10 45! Death Dance Tableau at 11°5! Carriages at 11°10! Success! Two-hundred-and-fifty- Enormous Ni still crowded with the éiite of Fashion! Be in time!!! eduee King of It-ly.—To come to terms with the Vatican. Emperor of G-rm-nv.—To stay at home. King o P-rtug-l,—To accept the situation in Africa. \ C-rn-t.—To forget the existence of E, King of Sp-n.—To master the difficulties of the Alphabet. Emperor of A-sir-a.—Between Kingdom and Empire, to make both ends meet. : Lord 8-\-sb-ry.—To for th» General Election. Mr. Gi-dst-ne.—To explain Home Rule. Lord R. Ch-rch-li.—To give up racing in favour of politics. Mr. H. M. 8t-nil-y.—To re-write Darkest Africa. Se Shih dip ot. Hore ‘To sttond to his protecticae! deaies r. - -rr-s.—To aties, And Mr. P-nch.—To bear as gaily as ever the weight of half a _eentury. Svccestion vor Ma. W. B. at tHe T. R. O.—Should Mr. Witsow Bageerr contemplate giving another Matinée of that out-of-date play, The Lady of Lyons, why not change its title to The Old Lady of Lyons? No extra charge for this suggestion. Geyvurye Onance Brrrers,—Police Protection to Tr Hzatr. ~ rs a

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Jaxvary 3, 1891.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

VOCES POPULI. THE IMPROMPTU CHARADE-PARTY. Sc The mg the tables and chars ENE— = hh A mt a ii heir conversation. ; somebody! Professor, Chorus of Ladies, Oh, do, rena om, Mee oma rie (modesty. Well really, I've rofessor png [io ae of foams of "oS ate oe egueceal~ 2 —- “M Monocottle——Oh, can’t we do

tat horus of Ladies. — - ore fn Ieee a La ay age tapes : To ‘ollen. ’s a simple y = lich ban culy one enp-enel ped leaf, or soto. Piatt oy yee ee lables mon "oh" one seed-lobe apes then, th “oh” ** oot ’- ** ei)” t get done (oo soht, ‘you know! sve, a Pollen. CW ah ed Well I merely w itoutasa suggestion, = Gecent Seaton amusing. No doubt I was wrong; no _ a inereou ye I’ve thought of a word. How would—er ow, really, Serrzn, do not to footle like “Dis. Serre rbvides amit general Feo a Wh. more, cht Lat Sree ew ie anil aah -"* booge, ow see it [Mr. Peng eS RE Dh et and Peleg The. ts allowed to Raay Tee on den ‘Familiar! “ Fame”-“ill”- The thing—ongratalate you, tie 1s! ‘ ~, I say, hese, 7 coemetal that, Mr. Wh. (ditto). What on earth dice %t matter whe it, so | un long as it’s right ? Don’t be an ass, Serres ! (Aloud.) How are we do the first lable ** Fame,” eh ? (Mr. Sarrex sulks. Mr. Oh, that’s easy. we Poet, and all nF he agra ea os don't mind do a lot of ing for his au me gt dont mind dane up by The Performers return from the drawing-room, followed Mr. Pushington. Went y, that liable, eh ? Nore You might hove played up saan Sais 2 - on ies Lokoper Ton word tes a in! Mr. Pushington, Because at once, that was all. I'll be & aelabrated Dootor, and you all come to Now ‘ae me one by one, and sa re tll—see ? for the the réle AA, a Physician in a dressing-gown yeomanry helmet. aol Gn [Attires himsel, and an

MODERN VERSION OF “PAUL AND VIRGINIA”’

Mr, Whi (huffily). cues ome 5 ag as well go and sit with ; pster y go —I’m no use Mr, Pushington. Oh, sven, Warrerna, I want you to be my oon- fidential butler, and show the patients in. ’ d (Mr. W. accepts—with a view to showing Posurxeton that other people can act as well as he. AFTER THE Sxconp SYLLABLE, Mr. Pushington, Seemed to drag a little, somehow! There was no necessity for you to make all those | soliloquies, Wuirsrzr. A Doster’ emmfdential corvant wouldn't ¢ tter so much | Mr, Whipster. You were so confoundedly rolomn over it, I had to as oe me oy x ea "baie you might have put it where someone could see it. 0 tL Ocien. I don’t know, Mr. Pusnrweton, why, when I my t ptoms—which I can vouch for as ntifically rite ast kicking m j cao Cotes was onl caleunaly ‘Tina ony trlag to bint to you that, ay ther to follow, it was time you cut the interview ble alone has taken nearly an hour. known the kind of questions you were Mr. Pusuiseron, I should certainly not have to them, Tsay no more, but I must positively deoline ; but really, know, in Charades one gets way at times. 1 assure you, [hadn't the remotes (F<. ae iss BuckraM is partly mollified.) — ee 7) be 0 sealer tmpeater, 6 don’t you know, and of you e ought to make t y fanny! Arrer THe Turep SriiaBce. Mr. Pushington. Lag pe Of course it was muddled—you all called me a liar before I my mouth ! The Rast But, yon & goes S Lene Sow Sp tage, ANS we had to bring the in somehow. Pushington. it in ?—but you needa’t have let it out, There was SerTeE “liar” till he was black in the face. We must have looked a set of Sen the free. with pople who don't ae, a t There ; settle the Word senrelvect "Ei. Pechingon:

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [January 3, 1891.

Arrer THe Worn, Aone THE AUDIENCE. Magician ?~Guarralling ?--Parnellite ?—Lmpertinence ? Ball’ we agician ?—Qo ing ?— ite ?— inence we give itup? No, they like us to poor things ; and besides, if we don’t. they ‘ll do another; ani it le getting oo late, and such a long drive home. Oh, they ‘re all coming back ; then it isover. No, indeed, we can’t « ine. “* Familiar!” To be sure—hovw clever, OUR BOOKING-OFFICE. and Aow well you all acted it, to be "x" must be quite tired | editing. al +! am a ne y indebted to yee - ear Miss Ross, wonderfull disguised yourself. 4 ised you a bit, nor you, Me. Woeusmreata. What part ou take ! Mr. Nightingale, 1—er—didn’t take any particular part—wasn’t wanted, you . Mus Rose. Not to act,—so we stayed outside and—and—arranged t of the pleasure, my dear, I’m — = Rose (sweetly), Oh no. I mean yes!—but we didn’t mind it much. The O. L. And which of you settled what the Word was to be ? Mr. N. Well, I believe we settled that together. [Carriages are announced ; departure of guests who are not of |i Smokang-room the house- ¥ Fw the , Mr. ayy - discorers t * not seem exactly popular with t other men, and puts it down to jealousy.

ROBERT’S XMAS BANKWET. We held our annywal Crismus Bankwet larst mony f Our principel Toast of course was, “Success to the Grand Old Cop- perashun, and may it flurrish for ewer!” with 3 times 3, and one cheer more for the bewtifool Lapy Mangss, and may she flurrish for ewer too! Ah, we Waiters is a gallarnt race and knows our dooty to the fairer and weaker sects quite as well as ewenj Aldermen their- relves. I next perposed the City Livvery Compnys, in a speech, as Brown said, as ort for to be printed and sireculated. had serttenly given a good deal of atention to it, and ps shood have dun ewen better if I hadn't quite forgot ewery word of the werry last part, which, unfortnitly, ‘we was all about the lots of money as they gives away. But I remembred all about their luvly dinners, and that was naterally more intresting to my hordience. I was werry much pressed to say which, in my opinion, of all the Nobel Livve Dumpaye guv the most nobly scrumpshus Dinners of ’em all, but I declined, on the that it wood nate- rally cause a most enormous emount pao y, and was of too deli- y eat and xquisit a natur to be thus pu discussed. There was werry considerabel diffrens of opinion about their warious choice wines, but all agreed in praising them werry hily, but ewen more, the trew libberality with whic was served, and not poured out so close as to make the pore Waiter’s dooty a thirsty and tanterlising one indeed. We drank the Nobel Army of Hotel Keepers, most serttenly not f in the gentlemanly Man of the truly “Grand,” as e - y knows as is anybody, drank to their great success, for werry ewident reesons. Young Frawx returned thanks for the Ladies, and, with all the reckless ordassity of a feller of forty, was rash enuff to say, as how as he werrily jved, that if the pri Hotel Keepers was to hintroduce pretty Gals as Waiters, all us F as he rudely called and git a yy vings in a more hings. An Old Lady. Indeed ? Then you had all the hard work, and none | .

S ud — — Toll’d after Supper. Subject for a Knellegy. ion of being a ‘ deuced funny ve up to this reputation, or to live somewhat affects Yankee humour, a manner as in his over- wo of the Ghost Stories are but their +9 < unworthy of them. Had they been introd into a tale as Dickens o- style there is a palpable attempt at imitation in the description of a stormy win’ night) brought in his story of Tom Smart, and of the inimitable Gabriel Grub, their mirth-raising value would have been consider- ably enhanced. As it is, these choice morsels—sandwich’d between heavy slabs of doughy material—stand a chance of not i To anyone who comes across the book the Baron sa “read about the Curate and the Card-trick, and Jomnsow Emity. The tinted paper i ] are also most of the amateurish illustrations. a Woman—not “ lovely woman” who “‘ stoops to folly "—nor woman who in our hour of case is ye and hard to —— oman, weekly Woman is doing un monly in her fifty-third number, gave the week before Christmas, her idea I} of a Christmas dinner, but for ‘‘ sweetbread cutlets,” a very it was. The same Woman gave also, among treatments of Turkey, Turkey i \ in Asia—yes—but what well; much better in French. y it’s very good, “* devilled Turkey” is “‘ hard to beat.” es Os I have been trying to read Leton Hunt. His Biography rested me muchly, and I had always heard, i Sane past, Soe tie wri

Lzueat, anp Ecciesiasticat Derintrion.—A Sheriff's Officer : Writ-ualist.

leaeem FESRER FER.

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"at the Oval between the Jaw Splitti

(— Vs a ee a - . / 2 Wie Old Sol. “ Happy New Year, Mr. Punch!” Mr. P. “ Hope we shall see something more of you in future !”’ January.—Continuation of ‘' good old-fashioned winter.”” London ‘*snowed up.” Locomotion by Hansom drawn by four yhorses, the fare from Charing Cross to Bayswater being £2 15s. Milk, 10s. the half-pint, meat un ble. Riot of Dukes at the Carlton to secure the last mutton chop on the premises, suppressed by calling out the Guards. People in via burn their banisters for want of —, The Three per Cents go down to 35. é makes progress. Sir Epwarp Warkin gets his line through Lords, crosses Regent’s Park, comes down Bond Street, and secures a large centre terminus in the Green Park, with a frontage of a quarter of a mile in Piccadilly. , March.—Football atrocities on the increase. A match is played Rovers and the Spine Cracking Wanderers, in which nine are left dead on the field, and fifteen are carried on stretchers to the nearest hospital. A pril.—Inerease of danger from electricity. A couple of large metropolitan hotels catching fire from over-heated wires, nineteen waiters, twenty-three policemen, and fifty-five members of the fire brigade getting entangled in in their efforts to extinguish the flames, are killed on the spot, much to the satisfaction of the holders of shares. ge The * Unemployed Other People’s Property Righta League ® stage. e “* Unem er e's ights ue’ being patted on the back by philan i formulate their pro- gramme, and seize the Stock Exchange and the Mansion House. Jane.—The “‘ Capital and Labour” Questi i i stage, 20,000 unemployed East End Lodg England, and give a tothe Lorp Mayor and Corporation to celebrate the event, at which Mr. Sheriff Aucusrus Haxris, in return- ing thanks for the ‘‘ Arts and Sciences,” says he thinks ** the takings’ of their hosts must have been “‘ enormous.” July.—Results of Gen. Boorn’s ‘* Darkest land” scheme. Triumphant return of the Submerged Tenth, who having enjoyed themselves immensely, have come back to the Slums with a view to having another inni i at “‘ the way out.” dupust.—The Authorities at the Naval Exhibition wishing to|A?4 undertaking, fire one of the hundred- ton guns some oversight” sends a shell into the City, which brings down the dome af Bt. Pent’, i itself, lays Chelsea in ruins, and causes the appearance of a letter stim the public taste for the which, ** bruary.—Railway incursion into the centre of the Metropolis | Tha

EDWIN AND ANGELINA. (One More Version.) Dear ma, Porcu,—l of to hear my tale of \ ME cae realy oo of Se mere you'd ke tai ow Epwun an And I am left to shed a tear aitaethatd. We were ex for eighteen months—he often t life Would not be worth the living, if I would Sty open, thoneh tapi, wong Mina” to be w oe 4 Yay here siken ug” He’d given me his photograph, and such a lovely January 3, 1891.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 5 October.—The great strike of everybody Nothing to A FORECAST FOR 1891. be got a enyahers, ate —— and Hembos of Parliament (Being some Extracts from the Gloomy Outlooker's Diary. ) Society, and bring up their own eattle to ' Being, however, ¢ | raze \| unable to Kill them peelesstonally withent the eld of s butcher, > e ~ gr \! Ce oe ee gunpowder, and divide them with a steam- ~ e {e) for w gocetadings Sw ao coneupet malisioesly = ee =~ 01 prespeuted by So Becket dee p Fyoventien of Coanty to Animals, SOK NOS BEEZ Nz November.—The continuing, and times very bad, = x SS several Peers take advantage of the 5th of the month, and make a I / Dig) NSS tour of their immediate neighbourhoods in their own qme-cheiee, SS |a ~ . thereby realising a very handsome sum in halfpence from a —=— mpathetic ic. bh nber.—First signs of a probable second edition of a ‘‘ good ae Ze = old- ” recognised. General panic in uence, Sy ‘ ran Fgh g JE) hy <_ . a iy | aaa terniiastes in gleumy despale. | Z23e— SS Ss 4 RS Uy S I bed eet upon hie mother, and had often yed to tea— ! She said that Epwiw had, indeed, a lucky = catch in me, I — him quite a model youth—hard-working, loyal, steady, A of pleasure filled me when he wrote, ‘‘ Your own, own Eppr.”’ Oh! a brighter and a gladder day is surely never known n when Epwiw his darling Anortina his *‘ own own.” It warmed me with the glow of love, it cheered me up when lonely, Yet 1 didn’t feel so happy, when it came to be, ** Yours only.” The extra syllable indeed did not increase the charm, I tried, however, to believe it didn’t mean much harm ; So confident was I that naught our love could hurt or sever, But it looked suspicious when next time he only put, ‘* Yours ever.’’ He only called me darling once! how different from before |! Oh, could it be he liked me less for other maiden poet And was he tired of me—the girl he loved so fondly, y? It could not be! And then he wrote, ‘'I am, Yours most sincerely.” Yes—was he going to fling me off as though a worn-out glove? You can’t do with Sincerity if what you need is Love! I could not think such ill of him, although it did look queerly, That in his next the ‘‘ most” was gone, and he was mine “‘ sincerely.” ne i Phen gy) 5 py rings 80 on ; ‘And. alles of, cuth tings eo thinn ht not to But it was more than I could bear he The truth was clear—I quickly sent His bangle, and his of I said to him how grieved I was And then I found out everything ;

:

influence of the early ieee, tet wal on well- being abolished. up goes the is no surplus for improvemen of coal dues were considered ‘* hard ** Hard times, come again

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ye? ” tT Mates sor : PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL [Janvarr 3, 1891. St YX Little Prigson. Tau 8 Qurrs THe Nicest Great I EVER mer. Aunt Riiza, * Dear ut! *rriow IN FAVOUR OF PReseyT Company /” Cousin Maud, ** Yes; ut porn Caszs, rou Kkxyow !” PRiIG-STICKING. ‘Om! as vor Gaicson, HE's DISTINCTLY THE MOST OBJECTIONABLE LirrLE Pric IN ALL ENGLAND; BUT HIS ” i 1 Waat sweerixo Assertions! You MigHT HAVE HAD THE DECENCY JUST TO MAKE THE TRADITIONAL A *Midst all that a youngster You're weloome, my lad! In winters of chill discontent he'll still smile, Sursum corda! That motto’s the best of the bunch ; Make it yo young New Year, and ’twill aD a pecker, Giving way to one ta be may take it from Never nape ome heart or a Don't look like a pedagogue, do I, my lad ? And indeed I am not an Orb bilius Plagosus, Like him who made juvenile F Laccus so sad. “A HAPPY NEW YEAR!” Mr. Punch, loquitur :— Harry New Year? I should think so, my boy, Tossed thus in the arms of your Poncur right cheerily, — ate ae At least, you ’re nning y Cader the Mistletoe Bough You 4, -l, 7g With a kiss from the lips that can never betray, There’s many a girl would be greeted that way ! It is eas old style To hail with stout heart all such annual new-comers ; His warmth seems to turn 'em to Summers ! istletoe Under the M All are bosh and bow-wow. He doesn’t mix rue in his big New Year hae Whose aim is to cheer up the national soul. ately sd, I vow, Than make that same maxim your boyhood’s first rule, As your very first tip in your very first school. How well the enusian knows us! Under the Mistletoe Bough He never Our Dickensish Season he seemed to divine maid, but somehow With his fondness for friendship, and laughter, and wine. No, Mh I don’t greatly believe in the birch, ( Though sometimes my Love's rather too apt to be left in the lurch By — smiters and scolders. Under the Mistletoe a A kiss is best treatment, must play—on rogues’ shoulders.) A salute from the lips of your of your Punch onl " not spurn,’ And the young guests around Tgeuto, ne bes, ems 6 Whe Uh come, There are clouds an each take a turn. storm-shadows about the horizon, Bat—well, you’rea a and rosy Young Year, As ever your Puncay set eyes on. Under the Mistletoe Bough You look mighty kissable—now. So here goes another, f Ao we wih everyuely A x ew Year! ay my ee, Old Morality's Christmas Card and New Year Wishes. Tuis communication is cember and prosimste 1 expression of the wish that on the i porns os you, and those not distantly connected wes ties, may have J a season of oy fen the new period of fe yy siedeer a ess. enley-on- Thames, New Year's Eve, im Toe Perrecr Untonw or Cucncn anp Srare is exemplified in the title and name of Bisnor Krxe.

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.—Jaxvary 3, 1891. | ‘““A HAPPY NEW YEAR!” oe \' . ' \ f 1 POTTS

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JAN

‘ec D “Tn propos forensi Mr. Bi AT We yt An And d Ands To<

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January 3, 1891.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARLI. 9 ——_— { TO THE COURTS éR.- NOT DEFIANCE.” “In these days of conflicts between Counsel, I propose to make a few additions to my usual forensic costume.” — Extract from a Letter of Mr. Welnown Kewsee, Q.C., to a young Friend. ‘* DEFENCE, AT THE END OF THE YEAR. To a Faiexp, ou remember how we sat, e two, in this same room together Last pot and talked of this and that, Le a our toes and cursed the weather ? And dreamed of ane, and puffed a cloud | (We both smoked briars, I remember), | And yey our whiskey hot, and vowed To do or die ere next December ? We spoke without oe of Bry, Brew who was ploughed, or very nearly ; Now Bey bamboozles jurymen, And makes his thousand guineas yearly. | We both despised the wretched Jor, | My fag at school, your butt at College. | Dall, > pompous, slow, | Choked with absurdly useful knowledge. | Yet Jom assists to give us laws, | § in the House, and shows his fat form, ’Midst empty thunders of applause, Erect on many a Tory platform. And inconsequential Jack, itis mind a maze, _~ Mr. Toore's, 8, as married money, keeps a And has a big account at Courrs’s. Tom owns a house in paprere Square, And Dicx is noted for his dinners— Life is a race, but was it fair, winners ? We asked, that these should be the We, too, would win ; and Heaven knows What vows we uttered fiery-hearted, While ’89 drew to its close, And 790 found u—t0 we parted. And hove, good lack, while ’ 90 wanes, Our eandles in their sockets, Wess ance mere am (eutnh oun gulas— grey hairs, and empty pockets, mi Heaven be thanked that made us friends ; en prate of wealth in empty words, I Sit here content as 90 ends, And sip my grog, and smoke my bird’s-eye. Do OUR ADVERTISERS. SEASONABLE, ps; -ME-UP PEPPER is a new irritating and explosive Stimulant. ICK-ME-UP PEPPER is the Universal Restorer. pae-ee. -UP PEPPER sends the sl ~ at baby instantly flying out of WICK: ME-UP PEPPER makes the in- valid Grandfather suddenly mount to the fifth storey by leaps and bounds. ICK-ME-UP PEPPER induces imme- te influenza. POEM UP! PEPPER turns head-ache deliri Per “PEPPER literally blows the brain tissues. PReeEcr Fi ‘PEPPER | the sneeze. ah SS PEPPER establishes fever 4 imthe InfantSchoo > JICK-ME-UP PEPPER paralyses the Ph Hippopotamus. ‘ “sets a whole ICK-ME-UP PEPPER drives a Chief Justice off the Bench. ed -UP PEPPER irritates the Soli- citor [ ICK-ME-UP PEPPER maddens the dentist. ~ DICK. ME-UP PEPPER sets the Arch- bishop dancing a break-down. ES PEPPER hurries the | sopher into a Lunatic Asylum. P=: -ME-UP PEPPER staggers the ris- __ing Politician. Philo- pr -ME-UP PEPPER causes the resig- | | nation of the Prime Minister. pes. UP ‘PEPPER makes, q tour- | wheeler cab-horse win the De Pp -ME-UP PEPPER is see sheet- anchor for Practical Jokers. picks ve PEPPER may be safely relied on by Master Tommy. pce -ME-UP PEPPER, put in the baby’s bottle, will divert the he Nursery. pes UP PEPPER, introduced into | the Soup at a dinner-party, will lead | **” to a serious riot in the dining-room. ICK-ME-UP PEPPER, administered in a sandwich, will choke an Uncle. psx ME-UP PEPPER is the general disorganiser of every Household. a pear UP PEPPER.—A Pinch will thoroughly banish sleep for a whole fortnight. ICK-ME-UP PEPPER. — ‘An Ocro- GENARIAN ConsumER” writes :—‘‘ I was in a comatose condition for ae vied when I came across your P searcely tried it ere I “ap from arm-chair, and have danced a con ual fa dango ever since. I carry it loose in all my ets, and scatter it on all my frien whenever I meet them. This has got me kicked ont of all their houses in turn; but I do not in the least mind. 1’m as merry and as mad as a March hare—and your Pepper has done it.” -. -UP PEPPER.—The Proprie- tore beg to inform their Friends and rd Patrons that they can supply th this flt malty. and —_ = a r 4 i ce det etna at ye , Viz., 1s. —% 2s, 9d., ne ls. 6d., &e., &e. SHADOWS FROM MISTLETOE AND HOLLY. Dear Mr. Powcau,—I venture to address you on a subject that I feel sure will enlist our kind attention and pathy. How Yule Tide? Ought I give of ** cards,” or I to send Tossing up for Turkey at Christmas Time, imagine that economy, not to sa is the cause of my conmag. to Wes Jo the Pos Office. Suppose that I the ex and do send the cards. W re tie pain i is a mae of oe patent SS culty to a suitable re oy receive my annu iMGiction If'T If have * ** Wishing you and yours every ha) ness,” with my appended name and lithographed, the greeting seems cold, = leven inap ppropriate, if addressed to, say, | favourite Maiden Aunt; and unduly fam ‘if forwarded to the acquaintance saw es it the first time in my life the day before esterday. Then if I trust to the ordinary Th hristmas Cards of commerce, I am often at a loss to select an appropriate recipient for a nestful of owls, or the picture of a Clown | touchin ue an elderly gentleman of i eer le appearance with a ayy in get a representation of flow ——— ten to one that the peer Sa te lines of a compromising character. It is | obviously cruel to send to a recently-widowed | Uncle some verses about ‘* —— and Joan,” and my Mother-in-law is not likely to feel bo if I forward to her a poetically | expressed suggestion that there is no plea- santer place her own home—away, of course, trom her Son-in-law! And yet arethe problems that meet the would-be Yule Tide card distributer ateveryturn! I remain, my dear Mr. Punch, yours sincerely, Ove wHo Wishes To avorp A Row. P.S.—If this arrives late, thank the cards that have overtaxed the postal arrangements, The United Service Diary for 1891. January March.— ; aM _. Bailors in f 7 h ee aeavente he morn- (ditto). October .—Soldiers on ~y + | Sailors at me Civil Servants reading the | morning paper. ceuvres). at play Extremes Meet. Civil Servants away (ditto).

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ee rw. “ te at shee PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL. [Jasvary 3, 1891. —=— . y vs , ory \ ~ ed a J, 4 V4 > YY y ia Y . WIR Y y Y Hi 4 bij ’ 7] VY) Mg Y Yj, Y be 4 i/, U FOLLIES OF THE YEAR.

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January 3, 1891.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. i

pockets? And when it is said that you IN THE LATEST STYLE. PICTORIAL MOTE TO HAMLET. |'Were turned out of Club for cheating at | ee Oy Ow Sarg Rarieand a But at this point I was assisted to take my leave with so much abruptness, that | was forced to leave my last question but par- tially formulated. g myself once i street, I noticed that I was reclining in the gutter, bare-headed. A little later, however, my hat was thrown after me.

POLITICS UP TO DATE. (Specimen Leader from an Irish Paper in a Chronic State of Revolution.) _ Wepwxspar, 9 4.m.— We appear | his morn- ing awaiting the future with confidence and ho far, we have been able to conduct this journal on_patriotic lines. We have denounced the Leader of the Party as the enemy of his country, and have applauded his opponents as the saviours of society. But we cannot conceal from ourselves that may arrive when this policy may be reversed. The hour may come—— _ 104.m.—It has! We have much pleasure in informing our readers that, after a vigorous fight (honourable to all who took part in it), we have conquered. This is in our hands, and henceforward we * su to the best of our ability, the Leader of the HAMLET AS HE REALLY OvGHT TO BB, Party, and denounce the infamous pretensions ACCORDING TO SHAKSPEARR. of his ae; ae. > ey = oe | os ‘ : - ignore possi 8 t ure, 6 © that this too too solid flesh would melt! may be overpowered by a tyrannical majority. Note.—Shakespeare was the originator of the | The time may come—— | esthetic expression “ Too, too,”” 11 a.M.—It has! Hurroo! It was hard on Es fighting to get back ; ut i

> ‘ Lo<'of Pe 6 Ow ck a as iz ‘ Si Magee a ) torious, but who ehall poomeeny wast may be ooming in the distant ages?’ The hour msy come—— a We: 12 Noow.—It has! it was i/ Gx , And now that we bave “Distinetly not. oy / i ff again taken possession, a / . WS, Ff ie ’ we mast say Par i AS never so elegant a Nie outed. The ite. aghs were flinging about all over the place, cracking crowns in all directions, end the scrimmages were pence in coppers;on a just magnificent! It mantel-piece alone \ . // was an elegant row with him, and on m entirely! But now to return have foun WAS Wi ost work. Our noble t\\\ Sey) i seaes, Socetres his \ L 4 trium is / \ nents are cameos, Still in the moment of Ss w/ 7. \Eee peee oe f ‘00 over “Tf he did, it must Cle chances of to-morrow. have been ei acci- Queen. “* He's fat, and scant of breath, The hour may come—— dentally, or to win a Here, Hamlet, take my napkin, rub thy brows.” _Ilrm—It hes! Be wan, @ pugs co ——_ —____— — jabers, what « ocon- —— joke. That he would do anything to censure at the | test! But we have just slaughtered them! Oh, it was a fine sight 8 is a Loam

the severest moralist, is absolutely dible. Why, he| entirely! How the ink-pots flew about! Easy now, let us to busi- shire man!” ness. The shorter we make our remarks the , a8 DO one can a “Bo I have heard ; and, now, Mr. Cuosx, as I see that you have | say what will be ing hereafter. The hour may come—— your breakfast, I will put to you a purely personal question.| 2 P.m.—It has! ith a vengeance! We have defeated them! finished Is it true that you poisoned your , drowned your uncle, | Hurroo, boys! This is not the time for composition! Tread on the tail stifled your niece, and brother-in-law ?” of my—we mean—our coat! Come on, ye dirty spalpeens! Hurroo! The Arctic ee aD at his moustache, and said [ Publication suspended until someone can be found—not other- something about reports to which I referred being exaggerated. wise engaged—to write and print it, while someone else starts ** And may I take it that you have never been in gaol for picking a rival and “ suppressed” edition. ——

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL [January 3, 1891. ——_ STF will be found pleasing b on faroushs and an Honorary in eters —On the Ist, Shootin Partridges com ity for aiming Sa jokes about firing off guns without , killing dead birds, &., Oa the 3rd, the present Lord Chancellor born in 1825—the name of GtrraRp entombed in Hals-bury. A little a Colonial Briton home al Academician living ~ ft may be amusingly called ** Watts-his-name”’), di in 1869. Not much in this, but msy possibly fill up a i is mae during the reading of a or the arrival of fresh hot water at a o eur married lady's initial hospitality at five o’clock October.—Fretpine, the svelist, bowled out on the | 8th in 1754. Battle of Agincourt on the 25th—an awful | example to habitual drunkards. Pheasan t-shooting | commences. Right time to tell that story about the THE AMUSING RATTLE'S NOTE-BOOK FOR 1891. January.—1f dining out on the 1st, remember that the Quexzw was created Empress of Hindostan on that date in 1877, although the Opposition tried to Ainder Aer from assuming the title. Work this out. Lent Term commences at Oxford and Cambridge. Can’t be given away if only lent. This entertaining quibble (suitable to five o'clock teas in Bayswater) can be applied to other topics. Note the colours of the Universities, and bring in somehow “a fit of the blues.” On the 13th Prrr died, on the 14th Fox was born. date suggestive of Pirr, the second of pity. Good joke for the| ing Midlands, Put it down to Suenrpay. February.—On the 3rd Lord Satispory born on St. Blaise’s festival. ‘onsequently might be expected to set the Thames on fire. This said with a sneer, shou'd go splendidly at a second-rate Radical luncheon-party. On ‘the 14th, if you receive an uncomplimentary missive, say it is less suggestive of Valentine than Orson. This capital jest should make you a welcome guest in places where they laugh until the end of the month. March.—Not much doing. On the 8th Battle of Abookir, 1801. If you take care to pronounce the vi A-book-er, you may pos- sibly get a ‘»st out of it in connection with a welshing tr ansaction on the turf, when you can call it “ the defeat “of A-book-er.” Good at s hunting-b ‘ast where the host is a nonagenarian, who can observe “* 1801 ?—the year of my birth!” far — eens Demanen was born on the Ist, so it can't be * All Fools’ Day.” Work this up to amuse a spinster aunt who reads the 7imes. May.—You may say of the Ist, if it is cold, that it isa A. date.” If you are asked for a reason for explain that you meant a ‘* Connaughty date, for it is Prince AnruUR’ 8 Birthday.” The claims of loyalty should secure for this quaint conceit a right hearty welcome. In 1812, on fe 22nd, Gris the celebrated songstress was born. Ata distance of four hundred miles from London, in extremely unsophisticated society, you may perhaps venture something about the notes of this far-famed artist being like “ lubricated lightning” for evident reasons, but you must not =pe any us to laugh. e name of this month may as 7 to a joke here and there in regard to a well-known ecclesiasti Counsel. This will be the more valuable. as the “ remarkable days” are few and far between, according to ~~ July.—Note that on the 3rd the Beg Bs mapa, and that it is also the anniversary of the Battle ronounce the victory “‘sad-hour” you should get a jest S eslecleas to cause merriment amongst persons who have spent the best years of their lives on desert islands. or as Chancery Division Chief Clerks. On the 24th the Window Tax was abolished, of which you may say that although a boon it was only a Aghé relief. If you can only introduce this really clever bon mot into a speech at a wedding break- lawyer and Queen’s| mas This tonne A whe, oP his “‘h’s,” shot peasants instead ! This well-worn Torin fons d attractive by Australians who have coon § e he belie A of their lives in the Bush. ovember joke still to be = in the quieter sub- urbs about having special appoint- ments for the 5th, when one has to take irst | the chair at a meet- which perambu- lates io chee streets. Lord Mayor’s Day on the 9th—oppor- tunity for letting off “‘the Mayor the merrier,” £10,000 a Mayor’s Nest - oR &e., &e. Jests t the efor not now popular — the serious larity ! day time for every- one, inclusive of Selpeipeens” the y of persons ‘‘ the fanny man.” Bor Lows (born in 1811) reaches the ALWAYS ENTERTAINING; eighty, the Grand Old Man On, Very wvUcH TAKEN cum (Connzy) Grain O! (born in 1809) eighty-two! With this ingenious quibble the Amusing Rattle can wish PTioclt a Merry Christmas, and the remainder of the world a Happy New Year my en eye there ever a more appropriate Christ- legal case than appeared in the Times Law 2 December 20th, and which was entitled “‘ The Mayor. §c. of Bootle-cum- Linacre vy. The Justices of Lancashire po What delightful names for a comic chorus to a Bab Ballad in a Pantomime. Solo, Ob, did ye ne’er hear of His diddle'ou the Mayor Chorus. Of Bootle-cum-Linacre a Solo, Wino weet forthe Justis of Lani Chorus. Singing Bootle-cum-L Too late for the Bu ues and the Pantone, but it vt tay oil be gerviceable at Music and “‘ places where they sing.” public, ang CAUT! > NOTICE.— Rejected Communications or Contributions, whether MS., a Matter, Dra im no case be returned, not even when accompanied by s Stamped and Addressed En there will be no exception. o Fete & op Gi, Cover, or Wrapper. To this 1 Whisky Be UA

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PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.—Jasvany 3, 1891. “Who are the Happy, who are the Free ? YOU TELL ME, AND I’LL TELL THEE. Those who have tongues that never lle, Truth on the lip, truth in the eye; To Friend or to Foe, To all above, and to all below, THESE ARE THE HAPPY, THESE ARE THE FREE. m ingly grateful, than SO MAY IT BE WITH THEE AND ME.” What higher aim can man attain than conquest over human paia ? DRAWING AN OVERDRAFT ON THE BANE OF LIFE. Late Hours, Fagged, Unnatural Excitement, Breathing Impure Air, teo Rich Food, Alcoholic Drink, Gouty, Rheumatic, and other Blood- Poisons, Fevers, Feverish Colds, Sleeplessness, Biliousness, Sick Headache, Skin Eruptions, Pimples on the Face, Want of Appetite, Sourness of Stomach, &c. It prevents Diarrha@a, the early stages. USE ENO’S “FRUIT SALT.” IT 18 PLEASANT, COOLING, HEALTH-GIVING, REFRESHING, AND INVIGORATING. YOU CANNOT OVERSTATE ITS GREAT VALUE IN K®EPING THE BLOOD and removes it in PURE AND FREE FROM DISEASE. to record my knowledge of the great efficacy of * Dean Srs,—I am A friend of mine, who three grandchildren very pleased our ‘ FRUIT SALT” in Measles. up with this complaint, administered frequent doses, with the result that ell the children Lewy through wonderfully in a short time. for which the mother was exceed: ks to you. For ged ~ ann your ‘FRUIT SALT’ is our universal remedy. Bordering on years I find 9 bottle of ENO’S ‘FRUIT SALT’ and a few of ENO’S * VEGETABLE Moros" the boon in the up-hill battle of this life. I am, dear Sir, yours truly, “J. C. Exo, October, 1890, ‘A Ovry May.” HE SECRET OF SUCCESS.—STERLING HONESTY of PURPOSE; WITHOUT it LIFE is a SHAM!’’—“ A now invention is brought before the public, and commands success. A score of abominable imitations are immediately introduced by the unscrupulous, who, in copying the original closely enough to deceive tho public, and yet not so exactly as to infringe upon legal rights, exercise an ingenuity that, employed in an original channel, could not fail to secure reputation and profit.”—Apams. CAUTION, —Ezamine each Bottle, and see that the Capmule ie marked ENO’S “ FRUIT SALT.” Without it, you have been imposed on by a worthless imitation. Sold by all Chemists. PREPARED ONLY AT ENO’S “FRUIT SALT” WORKS, LONDON, Sot BY J, C. ENO’S PATENT, CURIOUS OLD HIGHLAND WHISKIES - 7 WW 16 & 26 years in wood. | Price per doz. 48/- 60/- 72/- 120/- An eminent Medical Authority, in reoom- mending the moderate use of Whisky, states that on no account should Whisky be used unless it is well matured Detailed Liat on ication to MOREL BROS., COBBETT & SON (LIMITED), 210 & 211, PICCADILLY; 18 & 19, PALL MALL; 143, REGENT ST. Whisky Bonded Stores, Inverness, N.B. UAM-VAR WHISKY, THE FAMOUS OLD SCOTCH. TO BE HAD EVERYWHERE. USED IN THE PALACE AND THES SHIEZLING. THE BEST FOR CAMP, MOOR, OR LOCH. Highest A wards. Recommended by the edical Faculty. INNES & GRIEVE, EDINBUIGH and LOWDOWN. OLD IRISH WHISKY. CORK DISTILLERIES COM PANY,|G Limited. Gold ld Medals, ~ Paris, is, 1878: 1 JOSEPH GILLOTT’S P PENS, ] HOWARD BEDFORD Numbers with exquisitely Fine Points, for ARCHITEOTS, ENGINEERS, and DRAUGHTSMEN—170, cl179, 291, 303, 431, 659, 1000. PLOUGHS. THE G. B. DIABETES WHISKY Contains no Sugar. ls not stored im Sherry Caske. Tor DIABETES, GOUT, & KIDNEY COMPLAINTS. “ Certainly seems to deserve its name.” —Lascer. 44s. per Doz. CARRIAGE PAID. GEO. BACK & CO., Devonshire Square, London. J. EXSHAW & COS wepnet OLD BRANDY. bate gg hl Tv. Ww. Grastecd & &. . Kegent Street, W. CORRY & C0.’S SBR BELFAST (The Original.) GING ER CORRY & CO.'S Pure Esto. Gold Medal heverages, sepgenes from the waters of the cel brated Cromac licious ever produced. ———, 4& Fires phy aan Craven Rd, he a heat, 4. Ras cove, tases | GOLAN ASK YOUR BOOTMAKER roR THeWE STMINSTER: Regd. TRADE MARK. TO SAVE THE TELTH, USE DAILY THOMPSON and CAPPER’S DENTIFRICE WATER me 7 and Preserves the Teern 4a Sweet Fragrance to the Nasera. to the Mourn. And takes away smell of Tonsceo. N.B.—The success of this the first liquid Dentifrice made in En-land has led te many trs0nious imitations, It is necessary for purchasers to see T. & C.'s signature band on each Kottic Hotties, ls, 64, 3a Gd., de, 64,, and ts. 64., of ali Chemists and Stores or sent, post free, from %, HOLD STREET, LIVERPOOL HOT MINERAL SPRINGS OF BATH. Daily yield 607,600 at « temperatare of Bete ne Sounded ot Bey at Hath by the Komens in the First waters are weil known as being most pew nn 25 tm cases of Mheumatiom, Gout, end Skin Aflections. Corporation of Hath have recently eniarged and perfected the Bathe st ereat capenre In the words of one of the greatest Hygienic y Tue Bs J sa THY MOFT COMPLETE In Eonors. Band in the Pump-Koom. Letters to the lecnenee © will reeeive attention and every information. HORSE CLOTHING AND RUGS. w Designs and Patierne Perfect 6¢ Ali Wool Wone for Patterns (sent post free) to the Wrernca tarp Wootters (o.. Kawpst. London Agency ‘or Horse Clothing. 18, Berkeley Btrert, Pieesdiily, W THE AUROPHONE. THE DEAF MAY HEAR. Teel AUMOPHON & ia s new Beientific Invention ofan In cried wiaraw6ymy ome, a ony THE GENTLEMAN'S BOOT. THE BEST FOR COMFORT, Every pair branded on the sole and insole with the above Trade Mark. NONE OTHERS GENUINE. UNITED STATES WAVY REVOLVER for House Protection, Travellers, and for Military Purposes, takes Kiey's @ cal. Express and «il other “% cal. Pistol Cartridges. coLT’sS pg hy S MAGAZINE RIFLES, Por Le and + ame, Kook Shooting, aad | Target avd pay tees % Prmpiied beat COL2"S FIREARMS Co., Cou, 14, Pall Mall, onde, 6. W.

Page 16

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI —Janvany 3, 1891. SAMUEL Orting their 7 SCHOOL OUTFITS. R Public or Private © requirements of Youths that this important department of their bee i large 4) 2) BROTHERS. uvenile the ROTH ERS, with the result eo that ev sant in Suite, \ Kast: Youths who ha ao eae a4 sets che ea. Corded silk or eee ~~ 34 Workshops Tours « Fw For PLEASURE and PROFIT. FRUI Fothing so Profitable and Basy to Crow. 74 ACRES IN STOCK. ane ~~ K for Simple Itnetr oe and “Cae orer rir rus.” errno Dares * Epimpone.” with fully ranted change and cheapest high-class Razors krown. and fee tion) prove shaving with them to be “A ate, H fully met, and durabie be entitle enwerea CATALOGUE AND - PATTERNS FREE. and have not yet adopted a“ Drees” Coat. The materials uved are fine pack Twilis, Miastics, éc., and the Roll Collar is covered with rich Merchant Tailors and Juven‘le OutStters, 65 & 67, Ludgate Hill, London, E.C. Por an Paey, Lesustous, and Perfect Shaver. uve | ARBENZ’ $ celebrated Mandarin RAZORS, | yy ~ Eber | are best, Feliabie. eas sont, | merade unsolicited testimonials filed for imepec- RESS. — This Jacket is ve outarown t Satin, ~~ —4- Lgtente BEB; acd 46. Gray's Inn Road. “ Patonror.” “ Ero~.* LEA & PERRINS SAUCE. The Original and Genuine LD ios Sauce.” For HOT and CO MEATS, pra “ Kosrots.” “HEAVIEST POSSIKLE PLATING.” wear- inter abie ask FoR MAPPIN & WEBB’S PRINCE’S PLATE, ot iaeg- T Remarkad: —* nde of Trees to sult ali Solis Sas sh . I einer. even 2 GRAVIES, , asor a ke _—_ Sy ag | S00 ter cas, the eet of 4. ile the set of 7 omen SALADS, im Mates Blades, le. a4. rack | Fined Blade. 6. coh “HIGHEST ATTAINABLE May be had o php om a4 - aa QUALITY.” SOUPS, 3 P A. ARRENZ. 107. Or. Cucaces Sr., Prawrronan ACRES BUSHES, —— GAME, & me a. 72. doz.; 60s. per 100 MADE WITH BOILING WATE FISH, Planderas, Jie. per dos ié0s. per 100. Our 7) se ection) Pecking end Corriage Free for Cash with order. | HOSES IN POTS, from is. per doz, | EPPS CRATEFUL—COMFORTING, C2: 3.8 ORSAMENTAL TREES 81 ACKES FOUR ACKER OF GLASS CLEMATIS (99.070), ide, ie., and 246 per dos SEEDS AND BULMS—Vroerasce, Fiowea, ann Fann Descriptive Liste Free RICHARD SMITH & CO., Worcester. | MADE WITH BOILING MILK, S | WELCOME ALWAYS, KEEP IT HANDY, A SiHNT'S MORELLA CHERRY BeanOY. | OF ALL DEALERS. Be sure and ask for GRANT'S, and don't be put of with inferior mekea. WELSH RAREBITS, “UNEQUALLED FORK HARD WEAR.” Signature is on «very Hottie vi the Genuine and Original. CLARKE’S PATENT on “PYRAMID” LIGHTS, 4s ax » ker The “ Burglar’s Horror.” 5 THE “ 2 = & Ss ¢ i.) Be i” _ | GLARKE'S PATENT LIGHTS. Mark—FAIRY. 4 CLARKE’S NEWLY-DESIGNED “PYRAMID” KURSERY LAMP FOOD WARMER, with NEW REGISTERED PANNIKIN. 2s. 64., 3s. Gd., 5s , and 6s. each. The *'Praavwin” Foop Wazmeass, by their peca- liar construction—the glass chimney conducting end concentrating heat to the of the water vessel—a larger amount of trent and mgzat is oltained than can be had in any other lamp of the same class. Without smoxs or sMELL. IMPROVED PANNIKINS , (Reaistexep) for use with Cragce’s “‘Prsamip” Nugsexr Laur.— By this invention any liquid food can be poured cut, or drunk, without scum or grease sing through the spout, and prevents spilling wheo poured into a Feeding Bottle, so unavoidable with Pannikins wil! fit all al other ,Pannikins. There the old “ Pyramid” Nursery Lamps, and can be ie THE SHADED PART he REPRESENTS THE rig PLASTER FIRE-PROOF CASE. a Sing'e Wicks burn 9 bours each, :n Boxes ‘ | contaiming 8 lights, 8jd. per Box. i) CAUTION. post. TO PREVENT BURGLARIES.—A“ Pyramid” or Night Light should be lighted in 2. front and ' 5 back of every house as soon as itis dark. Houre- eR breakers have the greatest dread of a light. The Pt Police recommend a “ Pyramid” Night Light as ro § the best eafeguard. Almost all the burglaries TH perpetrated might have been prevented, and mach Sr y AL UABLE PROPERTY SAVED, if this simple wy and inexpensive plan had always ‘been adopted. | The “Pyramid” Night Lights are much larger es and give DOUBLE THE LIGHT of the common hae night lights, and es) — I~ y 4 ——— sl for this purpose a atent Fire- oe | proof Plaster Cases. No paraffin or other dan- | CLARKE'S PATENT %, gerous materia! used in their manufacture. ls. per Box, containing 6 Double-Wick “ Fairy” Ragpn, ane giass for burning in. Burn 10 hours each. “FAIRY” LAMPS, for Decorative | Lighting, Ball and Drawing Booms, &c., Bc. Sold by all respectable Dealers. separately. B.B—Ask for CLARKE’S PANNIKIN. and see that bi name the registered number 1241, & memes Poanihin, ind wots mark “PYRAMID.” “PYRAMID” & “FAIRY” LIGHT WORKS, LONDON, 1.W.; Show Room: 31, ELY PLACE, HOLBORN. And 484, COLLINS STREET, WELBOURIE | Ps ted by William Stuart Smith, of No. 90 Loraine Read, Nollowar, in the Parish of 8t. Mery, Islington, in the County of Midd cy i Comvare street, is tbe Pocinet of Whitetriars, in the City of London, ond Published by him at No. 06, Fleet Suest, in lesex, at the Printing Offices of Messrs. Bradbury the Forle of D4 Bide Clty of London —Sarenar, doswar} §, lei, , Agnew, & Co,, hee PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY. —— 2’