Punch 1862-09-13: Vol 43 Iss 1105

Page 1

2 ~ BVA PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY. Published Every Satarday, Price 6d, THE ARMY AND NAVY GAZETTE. EDITED BY W. H. RUSSELL, ESQ, LLD *,* Articles on American Affairs Appear Every Week. Office : | 16, 5, Wellington Street, | Strand Chief Office, 26, Bell Yard, Lincoln's Inn,W.C., the District Offices, an4 all Booksellers y N° 1105. VOLUME THE FORTY-THIRD. —e— SEPTEMBER 13, ¥ ih if i SS ' aK bi “ Ae wu i di In large Folio, PHiee 1S: Gd. cloth, half law calf, 17s, Vol. I. of THE GAZETTE OF BANKRUPTCY. (Jan. 1 to June 28.) COMPLETE LEGAL AND COMMERCIAL RECORD OF BANKRUPTOY. Reports, Particulars, Balance Sheeta, ow pie Ragaead Bankruptcy, with Complete ‘Pi petemmg BJONSAPIIVHIL BOlbd PUNCH OF FICE, 85, FLEET STRE ET, AND SOLD BY ALL BOOKSELLERS. HANDBOOK TO THE PICTURES IN THE INTERNATIONAL EXHIBITION. By TOM TAYLOR, M.A. Price ls, Baapsvry axp Evays, 11, Bouverie Street, Fleet Street, B.C. “SEA FISH : and HOW CRTCH THEW. “D would be. 0 asa qty: required. shows how to procure ee ia 4 of Ibe the tarkle, when ‘uly prepared. —— ithos cae Gamat ee fina’. Le yA beet, the ot af bewting the Has, and ll reqeisives ' te indereiood cap- ble of dewoost rath by éraeteg of dracram ” bhokBbth? sb Erne, 11, Kouverse ttredt, Fest Strest, BO.

Page 2

HUNDRED BIBLE BTORIES, with nearly 900 Bible Pic tures, & Pietorial Sunday Book for the ¥ wand boved, Aang i. 64, nally published at free from Finue's Great Bible Ware. ten se Quadrant. Every family should have this prevy book A GUINEA FAMILY BIBLE FOR 1¢¢—Jons Fie tpn has now ready a handsome Family Bible. with Notes, References, ® Engravings, and 10 Maps bound in et aln hone, style, for iG0., published at Tie, A benutifel only to be had at Jows pusse’e Couns Bible bowse, (6, Regent's Quad 50, 0002! BIBLES, PRAYER- BOOKS, and CHURCH eEavices, oe Juvenile Boots, and Standard Authors, on im every variety of binding, at Joan Fra:e’s ties Bible W 6, Regent's Queérest. WEDDING STATIONERY 50 samPces PGSTFREF PARKINS & GOTTO 25 OXFORD ST open LONDON AND RYDER, Goldemithas and Jewellera respectful lovite the notice of the Nobility. &c., to their New Stack of Elegant Jewellery very art article L. the beet possible taste, and at m vastety of novelties epecially —- th eos! Exhibirion, 1992, Prise Medal Wark. Jewellery, Silver Pilate, Teste Suits 15s. 6d. S95 ap LPS SSI > B. JOSEPH & COMPANY. 160, REGENT STREET LARK'S NEURALGIC ter r RFORALOLA TIC DoULduabon 3 £.—C Borer 67, St. Peal’. Gold Uy oll Chaniees Be. Od... 40. Od. Re The fn. oes ¥. Gone Ovsescar, Bart. M.A... Mus. spon Price OXFOR a ST Roars QePORy EMIRrvaE Wels ont haar} > feed Paarns, Son 2 os . 4, Lie seen, &, Chita Yoo ate : leedie ot Cane as ‘hr Queen, Rohe Square, ee away . OINTMENT yy fl wihew aay be SALT and bane te Ase sr AST INDIA fee Exwee woe te Sar wae Ale cal’ ewe boned aprriation.—Mooer & Co, Agents, ppp af Wawlentan) for Ex Street. E PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL—Serremper 13, 1862. NO MORE PILLS OR OTHER ER MEDICINES FOR OLD OR YOUNG. “ We find the safest remedy in DU DU BARRY’S delicious health- restoring REVALENTA ARABICA FOOD For Habitual (Indigestion), oe a Acidity, Nausea, Consumption, Congha, Asthma, ‘i ervousness, Biliousness, Torpidity of the Liver, Debility, &c."—Andrew Ure, M.D., F.B&. ; De Harvey, Dr. Shorland, Dr. Oamphbell. We extract a few out of 58,000 Cures :—Cure No. ba, 216 of the Marchioness de Bréhan, Paris, 17th of @ liver mene. I was wasting away for seven years, and so I was to rend, | write, or in fact attend to anything, with & and the most intol J. CARPETS. FOL N THOUSAND PIECES RICH B& 22. Ad. to Ye, t14 yar User VELVET AND TUSKE Pekitrens in Great Variet Eatreace - Tottewham Coase Road Dp Boni vu Abe peA wm oon for hours together. The noises me. I felt dreadfully low spirited, and a painful to me a, medical =, | hee French, had for in In despair I took to Do Barry's Arabica, and pret on thin Adiiotons Pood for B pte The good God be praised; it has Tage me, I am myself again, wwad abe to make and receive visita and resume my Accept, Sir assurance of my deepest gratitade and of my highest consider- pr ad pene DE Bebuas. ad Oure, No, 1,771. —_—- de Decies, of many qe ee 49. 832. sad Fifty years’ indeseribable agon nervousness, asthma, cong sicknesa, and vomitieg Paria Joly.”—Oure, No, 58,816. Field-Mareaal the Duke of constipation, nervousness, and liver complaints.—Oure, No. 47,121. indigestion, low spirits, and nervous > - James T. Campbell, F enham, Norfolk, “of = jisted all dical treat t; ing be cheer- In tins, 1 Ib., 2s. Od. ; 2 Ib., 42. 6d. ; 5 Ib., 11s. ; ye, 22s. — refined quality, 10 Ib., #8¢,— Banny Do Barry & Oo., No. 77, Regent Btreet, I don: 26, Place Vendéme, is; and 12, Rue de I’ Bmpereur, Bruasela. Also Fortwum a ‘Misow, , Purveyors to Her Majesty. TT. A, SIMPSON & Co., GOLDSMITHS, SILVERSMITHS, JEWELLERS, WATCH & CLOCK MANOPACTURERS, AND IMPORTERS OF EVERY DESCRIPTION OF FANCY NOVELTIES. 154, Regent Street, & 8, Beak Street, and Paris, Rue de Rivoli, Esse T. A. SIMPSON & Co. beg respectfully to call attention to their elegant and exten- sive Show Rooms at 154. Reoewr Srever, and 8, Beak Srreer, containing the most chofee and beautiful Assortment of Novelties in Fancy Goods, as well as Articles of Utility of —_ and Perelenm Manufacture, both valuable and inexpensive, for presentation, ferming in - selves an exhibition far exceeding any display of the kind in this country Mesens T. A. Stursow & Co., in soliciting the honour of an inspection of their extensive Stock and magnificent Premises, beg” to assure all who may favour them with a qisit, y+ will meet with a te reception, whether Purchasers or otherwise; and they desire to mate ry it will with them an invariable rule to exchange any articles purchased et their Establishment which may not be apgeuret. BPOty DIET. Its uses are :— PUDDINGS, CUSTARDS, BLANCMANGE, CAK&S, &., And for ight-eupper or breakfast, and especially suited to the Gélicacy of Thildren and Invalids: for all the uses of Arrowroet—to the very best of which it is preferred—it is prepared in the usual way. PATENT CORN FLOUR. MANUFACTURERS AND PURVEYORS TO HER MAJESTY: Paisley, Manchester, Dublin, and London. — SON’S WATCHES. ** Perfection of Mechanism.”—Morning Post. GOLD 5 to 100 Gs.: SILVER 8 to 60 Gs. Bend Two Stamps for Bewson’s Illustrated Pomphict, onmi ve of every construction of Watch now made, with Watches sent to all parts of the Kingdom free by Post, or to India and the Colonies for Sa, extta. 83 & 84, LUDGATE HILL, ap 46 & 47, CORNHILL, LONDON, £0, Established 1749. GLENFIELD PATENT DOUBLE-REFINED POWDER STARCH. EXCLUSIVELY USED IN HER MAJESTY’S LAUNDRY, AND PRONOUNCED BY HER MAJESTY'S LAUNDR&ESS TO BE THE FINEST STARCH SHE EVER USED. for this world-renowned Starch, is the best proof of its . THE GLENFIELD PATENT STARCH, which is adapted in an eminent d the following lour and Peariy to Fabrics which other Starches do, but r ay Colour and Strong in Texture, The the Glentield Patent Starch is the Most and if there be any who have not done are earnestly recommended to GIVE IT ONE FaIR TRIAL. wad they will find it to Basier Used than any other, and, like the Queen’s Laundress, resolve WOTHERSPOON & Co., Glasgow and London. COGELE 8, ANTIBILIIN ache, pa ° mg dorm, ie bones si te 16d, 3 Od, 40. Ad., and Nis H. HTH. VICEROYS § re Paraffic, l. & Wr Ib.; City Sperm, is. 4d. per Ib SiTMOAE & Cuavvocn, » Bichopegate Sere Within, Lo Conrasctons ro i. M Boao a” we Wass Noe’ Scediiee: be for Improving «i the Completion aod Skin, anc ine , or Pearl Dentifrice, = Breath. , and by Chemists a geet ACKNOWLEDGED | AProsat Exurerrron, 1962. RNITURE (AGE FREE aising the Flevee® with Amber Mouh Pee free 24. extra. lena peck fen Holborn, PARIS EXHIBITION. _ ‘OALFE, BINGLEY, J AMES INTERNATIONAL BOUQUET Price te. 6d. EASTERN ___ EASTERN ANNEXE, E EXHIBITION. THE LADIES’ ~ CONSTANT } apd pte ts the most us-fu! ave 1—3 FE sige, 7

Page 3

‘PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHA A PARLIAMENT OF PUMPS. E observe that at a meet- ing of the officious noodles constituting the Interna- tional Temperance and Prohibition Conferenee, assembled at the Hanover Square Rooms, in the course of the much , ing by which those fussy busybodies exposed their folly, the following espe- cially remark ur dities were uttered, ouaing to report, in a paper by the Deas or Can- LISLE on “Legislation on the Liquor T ” sug- gested hy ouse of Commons in 1834, which was read by the Rev. Canon J ENKING :-— “ The dean said that time had exaggerated a hundredfold the reasons for | which existed in 184.” Considering the noto- rious decrease of drunken ness which has taken place ; during the last eight and- ent in asserting that time had exaggerated the reasons for legislation on the liquor trade. c less Close says about exaggeration of those reasons the better. Time tells only the truth. We also read that :— “Mr. Havomtor, of Dublin, could not understand on what principle of logic or common sense after hundreds of Acts of Parliament, men could seek a continuance of restrictive measures.” | So far so wise. One wonders to hear such reason from the mouth of a teetotaller. One thinks one has met with a sensible advocate of temperance. But in the very next sentence | Mr. Haveaton bewrayeth himself :— “ They must have free-trade or prohibition—he said the latter.” Anybody endowed with the least logic or common sense would say the former. If hundreds | of restrictive Acts of Parliament have failed, the presumption is, that a prohibitive Act of | Parliament would succeed no better. But Mr. Havcutow comes from Dublin. A less | rational gentleman never came from Cork with his coat buttoned hind-part-before. Teetotal Ireland having spoken by the mouth of Mr. Haveuroy :— “Dr. Fiaa, of Scotland, asked if it was not inconsistent with equity and British law that persons convicted of crime committed whilst they were intoxicated should be subjected to punishment, and whether they ought not to be treated as lunatics?” Equity, Da. Fice, has no jurisdiction in cases of drunkenness, and though the Lorp CHasCELLOR may direot the disposal of a lunatic’s property, the Magistrate only can order an twenty years, Dean Crose evinced little judg e A TEMPTING OFFER FOR THE MILLION. my my my Heng is an advertisement that has been running about the French we are sure, cannot “and English ne It in any day that we have’ over the world, had this extre-hyperborean | summer :—~ ‘0 BE SOLD, for 10,000,000 francs, the chef d’ceuvre of Raffaele and | of painting, an unknown original, representing the DEATH of 8ST. JOSEPH. j demanded will possess the picture without competition. uction be disposed of tely. , 17, from 1 till 9 o'clock every ae, except Sunday. M y and be reserved for those who, wishing to see the picture at leisure, but exceeding half an hour, will pay five francs for admission. We advise, therefore, all those who have 10,000,000 frances to spare, | not to lose a moment’s time, but to make an offer at once. He who| | Comes first will have the honour of being knocked down first. If the | second bidder were to make an advance of one, or two millions, his | | offer would be indignantly rejected. “competition ” to possess | | it is already so great, that if you hesitate one tidal train, the picture | may be for ever snatched from you. So attractive are its charms, that | You are not allowed to admire it for more than half an hour at a time. i one eestatic minute longer, and you are infallibly charged an extra five franes. If we hadn’t been to Paris already cight times this year, we would rush over incontinently, without waiting to kiss the children or | say good-bye to Judy, y to see the chef d’auore. It is true that | oss. Paut pe Sat Victor says that the picture in question is not | but then Mons. Pavi is an art-critic who does not | about it. i Tals is For the at :c— therefore, in his ra =Erenese ik a Ac. | Law in Yankeedom, 105 RIVART. © investment, on the part of the drunkard, in the | Stocks. Drunken persons ought not to be |treated as lunatics when they get sober, and | whilst they are drunk they are liable to get shut }up as it is (as Mr. Punch has elsewhere recom |mended that they should be). It is not only | consistent with British law, but it is a British law-maxim, that drunkenness is no excuse for a crime, but aggravates the offence. A very im- becile person, who talks idiotic twaddle, ought to be taken care of equally with a sot affected with delirium tremens, Thou art answered, Fiac, according to thy figgery. A fico for thee, Fico! The Rev. F. Bisnor spenking of the Maine said that :— “ The law was enforced at Worcester. He attended a mi festival there, at which sentiments were spoken to without wine being drunk, and all the officers assem bled at breakfast next morning free from headache ” Wonderful! Does Mr. Busnor imagine that officers are lly accustomed to get drunk at military festivals overnight, and come down to breakfast with a headache next morning? And are total abstainers never troubled with head- aches —even after having listened toa long speech | made by a simpleton ? A dreadful witticism was another reverend gent :— * The Rev. H. Gas. objected to the disfranchisement of publicans, which contemplated their existence, which ‘t | was intended to terminate. (/Laughter.)’ Mr. Gat rently proposes to terminate the existence of the publicans by starvation, |) Gat, thou didst make a bitter had joke, and art, indeed, the very gall of bitterness! Thou mlso, Gait, art answered according to thy quality, After the inanities above quoted, we are happy to present our readers with a bit of fun, related very seriously by a Ma, Stxciare :-— | “In explanation of the fact that liquors could be obtained at Delavan House, New York, he said that Mr Deravan had let the house on 4 lease which stipulated that intoxicating drinks should not be sold there, but the tenant evaded the terms of the lease by purchasing the next house and making a communication between them.” He knocked a hole through the wa!!. », let Mr. Stxcriare and his allies be wel! assured, will a coach-and-six, or a railway-train, be driven through any Act of Parliament, bearing on the liquor law, which interferes with the liberty of the subject. perpetrated by purchase, and what is more, never will. If it is equal to the advertise. master-piece of the very highest colouring that be matched for its boldness and daring effects all JUMP OUT OF THE BAG, PUSS! “ Presrprst Lixcouw has ay to Ma On view at Paris, at the He sys that he is emphatically for union, and that he would retain or destroy slavery wholly or im part if union could be obtained by either means.” Horace Greevey’s recent letter to him what Liscoun writes to Horace, Somebody make a glossary for us, Ignorant owls we are: North has been ranting, raving, blaring, Scolding, swaggering, cussing, swearing, Beeause Britannia was not sharing In tHe Anti-Stavery Wak, ——————- — Bruin at Large. Iw a list of fashionable intelligence we meet with the announcement “ Parsce Mewscuixorr has left CLaniwwer’s Hotel for Germany.” Left Crarier’s Hotel, has he? We thought that Menscurkorr It is very clear that he hasn’t ten| had been staying in the Zoological Gardens. | A MATERIAL DISTINCTION,

Page 4

108 PUNCH, » iii Bik >» W 4 a wt DW ao | Nt A Ss Pa Fatioven Swett. ‘‘ Confound these Pict-chars—so many of em. Tell you what, you go | natures are kept apart, the more likely they are to remain down one side of the Galleru JA and I the other i; we U get through ‘em that way.” A VENERABLE BANKRUPT. “Dear Ma. Ponca “ As you are always ready to defend those who are wronged, I beg to submit my case for your consideration. “T have had the misfortune to become a bankrupt, and a brief report of the circumstances appeared in the newspapers. I subjoin the material part of that report :— * The bankrupt, a young man, had spent nine thousand nds in about as many months. The creditors consisted of bosiers, jewellers, publicans, bill discounters, and others. No person appeared to oppose, and the examination was “ Just so, Sir, and I think it would have been very hard had any one opposed. I do not dispute the accuracy of the statement that I spent nine thousand pounds in about as many months, but I contend that this cannot be celled an extravagant expenditure. Nine thousand months, Sir, as I need not tell you, make seven hundred and fifty years, and I respectfully submit that taking ito account the disturbed ages in which I have lived, and the various calls which the necessities of those times made upon me, I have not been wanton or careless in my outlay. I was born, as » slight calculation founded upon the above statement in the papers will show you, in the year 1112, but it is unfair to charge me with spending much money while very young. My first serious out- lay was for a very handsome suit of clothes in which I attended the coronation of the Empress Maup at Winchester in March 1141, and if I flatter myself that I cut rather a brilliant figure upon that interestin occasion, such vanity may be pardoned in a springald. I gave a alll deal of money towards the sbrine of Becket, after the very unpleasant occurrence in Canterbury Cathedral, and [ contributed rather largely to the £400,000 raised to ransom Kine Kicnarp tue Lionwearten, and the man who would refuse to stretch forth his hand to rescue a virtuous —well—a valiant king (virfus has both meanings) in distress is un- worthy the name of a med’eval buffer. I was a good deal victimised during the Wars of the Roses, and [ sent Krye¢ Riowanp tae Turn, who was a very fine fellow, and has much misrepresented, a some present, in order to show my disbelief in the ridi set about v the papers of the period, that he had nephews. I went to the Fie! of the Cloth of Gold, iohed ‘off be I need not say OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [Serremser 13, 1862{° M‘CLELLAN’S MARCH. Ron, soldiers, run, but not away, Oh no, my gallant men ! You run to turn another day, And charge the stronger then. Strategic movement, not stampede, This retrogression style, Because we are, as we ‘Advaneing all the while. The fiery comet rolls, on path Elliptic, through the sky ; So we pursue our course of wrath : e, Like blazing stars we fly, And still shall fly till we come back As fast as now we go, And scatter, in our burning track, Destruction death and woe. On, then, ye Warriors of the North! war . sphaw¥ mind, t forth, Vith all the s you can put fort And leave the South behind. Back! that is Forward! on your focs, ‘ To — their own tu out, Jur yoke that you may reimpose : Face—to the right-about ! SECOND THOUGHTS ARE BEST. It was the intention of the Comet, when it originally started on its holiday trip, to have paid a flying visit to the | Earth, but it became, on the very first glimpse it caught | of this terrestrial globe, so dissatisfied with what it beheld, | that it immediately turned tail, and is nowharrying away in | | an opposite direction as fast as it can. Far from regret- | ting this estrangement, we are delighted to notice this | increasing coolness on the part of the Comet; for we are confident if the Earth and its fiery friend were ever to meet, | that either one or the other would be sure to suffer dread. | fully from the consequences. It is peculiarly one of those | cases in which the farther two persons of quite contrary | friends. occasion, and I had to pay rather pes when Quzew Bess wanted | money to fight the Spaniards. I paid away money a good deal du ing the Civil Wars, and Kise Cuartes tHe Seconp borrowed a lot of me, which I need hardly tell you I never saw again. I own to having been done in the South Sea Bubble, but we all make mistakes sometimes, and I atoned for my fault by subscribing liberally to the defence of England against the Pistendes, I could not, I put it to you, stay away from the coronation of Geonce THe THIRD, and prices were high in those days, and I had my pocket picked in the No Popery riots of 1780. I suffered also by the commercial embarrassments of 1810, and by some of the companies, especially one for importing quicksilver from the planet Mercury, in 1825, and this brings me on to the present time, when I have also had my troubles. s : “Now, Sir, I do not think that nine thousand pounds in seven hundred and fifty years is a very large sum for a man who has lived in | , ee society to spend, and I think that the Commissioner might have | ismissed me with a slight compliment. However, I rely upon you to do me justice, and am, Sir, “ Your obedient Servant, “Tue Bankrupt ty Question.” A Lesson to Auctioneers. At the Mansion-House, one day last week, Wrtttam BRaCKLI®, 4” | Auctioneer, was charged with an assault on a Mr. Taomson, which con- | | sisted in hitting the complainant a violent blow on the mouth. Defendant | | pleaded guilty, and was fined 40s. and costs. Serve him right, Auc- tioneers must be taught not to knock people down. “4, HEAVY BLOW, AND GREAT DISCOURAGEMENT.” It seems very strange that at the present moment, in America, when they are experiencing ifficulty in raising the wind, that every one should be rushing away as fast as he can “ to get out of the draft. Aw Exoravine sy Doo.—A forged bank-note.

Page 5

Szpremser 13, 1862.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL 107 REPOSE. Yes! Bor wk aRE SURE THaT Iv ELLEN KNEW WHaT A Ficure Frepericx mape or Her BY SPRAWLING abovuT on THe CLIFF JUST BEHIND Her, SHE WOULDN'T BE 80 Quiet. A FEDERAL TRIUMPH. A Feperat warrior writes the New York Commercial a \etter con- taining the following account of an expluit in which he assisted at Donaidsonville on the Mississippi :— “Carraris Beoomez, with the marines of the Hart/ord, landed, and immediately in search of one Puitir Lawpray, a noted guerilia captain, and a very desperate character. We came upun him as he entered the lane leading to his house, before he had time to out of the gate, and as his horse could not jump the and bridled, also his sword, al] of which we captured.” What, all? That was a seizure indeed for the marines of the Hart- ford, with Captauy Buoome at their head! It appears by the fore- wing cocount, that they not only took the borse of the guerilla Captain, saddled and bridled, but likewise the whole of his sword. What a quautity of plunder! Having accomplished this wonderful capture, our hero tells us :— “ We then proceeded to his house, which was handsomely furnished ; we burned his house, furniture, stables, outhouses, and sugar refinery valued at $100,000 While engzged in burning his property, a party of guerillas fired upon us from the bushes, but at too great « distance to do any damage. We suppose they imme- diately ran off, as we could find nothing of them afterwards.” Is it possible that these warriors would have run off too if one or two | of them had been shot by Carraux Lanpray’s guerillas “ while engaged in burning his property ?” The gallant fellow says in conclusion :— “ We burned, besides, some 24 houses, including hotels, saw-mills, &c., destroying | over half a million dollars’ worth of property, and returned to the fleet without losing a man.” There is or was a political section of Americans rejoicing in the name of Barnburners. Perhaps this paity has taken military service under the Federal Government, and the author of the above-quoted tale of arson practised on private houses as & warlike operation, and bis com- rades, together with their leader, Cartaty Buoome, belong to the corps, which has been draughted into the marines of the Haréford. ‘There is & genuine Yankeeism in the unconsciousness of a ludicrous self-expusure ‘80 long puzzled the world, is at last comprehensible. relating his share in a pleasing and meritorious transaction, and partly the gust with which a felon details his crimes, With what a relish, having described himself and his compauious as having “ captured” Cartain LaypkayY’s sword, he goes on to say, “ We then proceeded to his house, which was bandsumely furnished,”—evidently gloating on the value of the furniture they destroyed—“ we burned his huuse, furniture, stables, outhouses, and sugar refiuery, valued at $100,000!” How keen is the enjoyment with which he dwelis on the injury which they inflicted on the Confederate officer, “ while engaged in burning his property,” and with which he mentions that they burned numerous other houses and places of business, “destroying over half a million dollars’ worth of property!” Wuhata notion of having been concerned in a glorious exploit is obvious in his boust that they all “ returned to the fleet with- out losing a man!” their enterprise against aun enemy incapable of resistance, remindiog us of the victurious assault commemorated in a couplet quoted by Cossert :— * Father and mother and I, with a chosen band, Beat « poor little boy till be couldn t go or stand.” Just such a triumph, apparently, was that which the incendiaries of Donaldsunville have to brag of, aud whuch is glorificd, as above, by one of the gang. Another Discovery in London. So, the wonderful Cavity behind St. Paul’s, that mystery which has It is not a pit (constructed on the principle of the Bears’ den at the Zoulogical Gardens) in which aldermen are kept, and taught to ciimb up a pole, and take bits of green fut from the end of sticks. A proclamation, rendering the eye-sore still more hideous, now extends across it, and announces—“ Beer below.” Henceforth, therefore, let the hitherto anovymous Hole be kuowa by the name of the Kung-Hole. ! . ° . . ° . remarkable in his description of the manceuvres carried out against | “Puitie Laypray, a noted guerilla chicfiain and a very desperate | character.” The narrative evinces partly the self-complacency of a man | aOR ee

Page 6

} upon its general condition with mention of any § phs, eocithen, and convenient reference. — “3. For reasons inex- desired me to depart from my ordinary rule of select- ing as my quarters the most distinguished Hotel in the place, and of affording its proprietary ev oppor- cone for Vioplasng its re- sources, and you instructed me to take lodgings aud live quietly. Repulsive to my own feelings and habits as was such a course, I have not hesitated to abey, for reasons that will oceur to yourself or your respected cashier. “4 There were no lodgings to be obtained on my arrival in Hastings, but towards nightfall L watched a family out of a house, and I rushed in before any other candidate could arrive, I seeured a back parlour aud a closet, which it would be flattery to eull a bed-room, for two guineas ard a half a week, kitchen fire, shoe-cleauing, gas, and most other things of course extra, I could have lived more cheaply at an hotel, mais tu l’as voulu, M. Panch. “5. There are six families in the house, and they all insist on taking their separate meals at the same hour, There are eleven children in all, from ahobbedyhoy with clumping boots and a heavy voice to a baby whose iucessaut shrieks indicate rather a very bad disposition or a totally indifferent nurse. They begin to get up at six, after which there is no peace. | mention this martyrdom among the special circumstances referred to in Paragraph 1 “6. The cigars sold to visitors in Hastings are, so far as I have yet had opportunities of ascertaining, simply abominable. Whether the vendors have better ones for the netideate { know not, but I have not allowed price to stand between me and decent tohacco, as you may be aware it was not likely 1 should do. I am exceedingly unwell in consequence of this local peculiarity. “7. L think | have never seen so many pretty girls in any given watering-pluce as are now in Hastings. That I can appreciate this fact, under the moral disadvantages implied in the paragraph No. 6, may 1 think be taken in proof of my impartiality as well as of my gees They mostly wear hats, have lovely hair (much golden hair is visible) but the new sea-side jacket of blue with its little brass buttons is not much worn, save by those who have few other attractions. “ 8. This is a place rather for aristocratic sorts of people than for common pry | makers. This statement is not my o bat was tendered to me by my landlady in return for my complaint that several articles were about twice as dear here as at Brighton. I was imstan silenced, or rather convinced, and I replied, ‘ O, of course, we don’t care what we pay, aw, but we like the best of everythink,’ a sentiment which obtained that lady’s admiration. “9. The Local Board of Health is said to have done a good deal for the Drainage, which used to be outrageously bad. There are awfully fishy odours in Hastings proper, and there is a vast pipe in front of Hastings elegunt, and | hope it is all right, but I have not vent near. detect nothing ehjaciianehio in the general atmosphere. The Board has painted its name in large letters on the backs of all the seats along the sea—seats may bave no obvious connection with a Board of Health, but the dodge is a good one, as it perpetually reminds visitors that there is a Body watching over the sanatery condition of the place. “10. The boatmen are not very qeublennet, and if you make a tolerably loud and abusive answer to one tout, the others will let you alone. You are not much annoyed by the vendors of shells and pin- cushions: [ suppose they find it vedi the to bother us, the aristocratic sorts of people. ‘The bathing machines are very bad, but the curators PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI, _[Serrexsmn 13, 1862, y Cing Port, and to report circumstances which might seem to me desirable of notice, I have the honour | /. to — such report, as “9. I number my . as usual in official for more plicable to myself, you T | one would think, involve not a little. “ il. The hired carriages are very good, indeed. Most of the drivers TINGS. have red faces. The turnpikes are numerous are, on the | REPORT ON HASTINGS other hand, badly made and badly kept. Perhaps, if the pikes were | BY OUR OWN SPECIAL COMMISSIONER. done away, the roads might be better. They could hardly be worse. “12. The Dripping Well scarcely drips, and Old Roar doesn’t roar. O tae Hon. Mr. Puwcn. | Both are humbags, but the scenes in which they are placed are pretty. J ‘Sin,—l. You having | The Lovers’ Seat is connected with the dullest and stupidest common- £1 commissioned me to visit | place story of an elopement, but the view is an out-and-outer. Ez ("HASTiNg}) this ancient and celebrated |” “13, The Hastings Guide Book is the worst 1 ever bought. It is padded out with antiquarian rubbish, and the careful detail and advice which alone make a guide book worth having is absent. But the con- coctor may have purposely left it, unexplanatory, in the interest of flymen, biped guides, and the like, in which case I admire him as a man of Hastings, while I object to him as a man of letters. “14 The Volunteers work very gallantly, and have the most de- lightful shooting place. To lie on the bill-side, near the sea, and look at them, makes one feel quite ardent m the cause of patriotism, and the more so when one has a good weed, femates by an Officer, from his Loudon remnant. I believe that if the battle of Hastings had to be —_ over again, the Volunteers would do better service than the old Archers, and then, when the order came for an advanee with the Bills, Idn’t the lodging-house keepers make the foeman_ 15. The Cireulating Library are obliging, ing, and at the shortest notice. y get the new beoks and let you do not seem to think it a favour te let you have a book, and they do not insult you for expressing an unfav inion upon one which they n- may place im your hands. In a word. thay Lnow their business. wou “ sequently, there is great reading in tings. I saw one of my own works, tho by no means my finest, in the hands of eight very handsome he . [? Béitor of P. “ 16. Dover is within sight of Hastings, and letters from Hastings to Dover are sent round by London, so that you get an auswer on the third day. I don’t know that it much matters, as nobody can in a hurry to hear from Dover, but [ mention it as a curiosity of the post. “17. I am happy to say that there are no public amusements here, except throwing stones into the sea, so that I am spared the necessity of puffing provincial abilities or London intolerabilities. “18. The cigars are abominabie, but the girls are very pretty. “ T have the honour, &c. “ Bohemia, Hastings.” * Perecrine Fatcoy.” GARIBALDI DOWN. Axas! the love of Italy lies bleeding, But not in vain; his wounds are mouths, that speak, With an ungenerous Patron strongly pleading, The stronger that the Prisoner’s voice is weak. He fell, a forlorn hope of patriots leading, ; Whose cry for Rome had fallen on ears unheeding. How long! And must they Rome still longer seek ? A hero’s venture, not a madman’s freak, : The world had named h's high attempt, sueceeding. it has not failed, a captive though he lies, If niggard France relent. Naponeon, bear The noble blood that out upon thee cries, And thy base policy, which right denies To Italy, if not thy baser fear. SUFFERING AND SYMPATHY, Tuere is, in Galignani, an account of an accident which happened near Gress to a foreign nobleman, who was riding in his carriage, when his horses took fright at the discharge of some firearms, and ran away with him; whereupon, says Galignani :-— “ the wheel, he fell violently to the a peppy hr a7 p ay ae His condition, how- ever, does not inspire any uneasiness.” Doesn’t it? The condition of a man laid up with a broken leg, not to mention any other injury, may not iuspire any uneasiness, but must, The Progress of Slang. A Marries in high life is called an alliance. People being gene- rally prone to ape their superiors, this foolish word will soon come to be applied to marriages in middle life and low life. The yocnueney con- sequence will be, that a married couple will be called Allies. A as | « and thereof are extremely ewil, Deeorum of all ki is strictly enforced, a Contrast LO must walering-places. { my Ally” instead of “ My Wife and 1,” or “ | and mm »* will we speak of Captain So-and-So and his Lady instead pf his Wife. will next be Captain 8-and-So and bis Ally, and u tely “M be a customary form of speech amongst the lower

Page 7

Page 8

\| Or, Interference would be very Welcome. a Ae _|} SWORD. st ae) sp. a= = — z. r=) om = — 7 GARIBALDI

Page 9

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL—Serremner 15, 1862, Qont you Guix we cughE — “NOT UP TO TIME;” Or, Interference would be very Welcome.

Page 10

Page 11

SEPTEMBER 13, 1862.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 113 AWFUL SCENE AT BIARRITZ. The Mam ov Stiunce has gust entered his dressing-room near the sea. The door of the apartment is violently burst open, and enter to him the May oy Fizet Sree. Mr. Punch. I say. Come! The Emperor. Come w ny friend, and would you shut that door, as there is no end of a draught Mr. P. You are surpri The B. 1 am never surpri Mr. P. Well then, I am, sometimes. And this is one of the times. How came you to run away from Paris without seeing me ? The E. My friend! Mr. P. O, bother, don’t friend me. I consider that you have behaved uncommonly rudely, and that ’s all about it. The E. Ut so, allons ! Mr. P. All very fine, but oe eg mt. F “oy thin : 3 4 1old his gue, that you astonish your subjects by your silence, but we are not to be done that way. What are you going to do? The E. Bathe. Mr. P. 1 say—not too much of that sort of thing with me. I like the epigrammatic as well as anybody, but there is a time when it is a man’s business to open his mouth. Is there not? The FE. At seven. Come. n’t dress. Mr. P. I'll tell you what, Elected of the Millions, you ll rile me presently. Yes, I will dine with you, but look here. I have come to | you upon the Italian question, and I demand to kuow your intentions. I ought to be aware of everyting ? The BE. Who is, if not you? to see me ? Pag don’t impose upon me with your it such a miracle that a man is able to Mr. P. A very proper compliment, Lovis Narotzoy, but I am not exactly in the mood for compliments at this present speaking. Lt is | perfectly clear that a crisis has arrived, and that the eyes of all Europe | are now turned upon you, The E. Rude of Kurope. [ Draws down blind. | Mr P. My dear Emperor, I am not here to learn that you have} plenty of esprit, or that you might write a whole Charirari by yourself, if you could get your censor’s leave to publish. Now let me have a serous answer to a serious question. hat order have you sent to your General in Rome ? | The E. The Legion of Honour. Mr. P. Nephew of your Uucle, do not provoke me too much, for this | is very hot weather, and I have a temper to match. Gaxrpavpr has | | made his attempt, is defeated, and is a wounded prisoner. The move- ment is at an end. The E. How carefully you have read the papers. : _ Mr. P. You want to put me ito a passion, do you, Sire? Then you just shan’t. Now, Mr. Protector of Rome, you perceive that the good King, Vicror-EmMMANUEL, is quite capable of protecting Rome | without your aid, and so you may march out with perfect comfort—for the door is open, The E. (Looks at handle). No, it is closed, but I thenk you. Mr. P. You will not have much reason to thank me, presently. Do you hear what I say? Rome does not want you there any longer. So, are you going to walk out ? The BE. With the Empress, at two. Mr. P, Ereror, you have no business in the Eternal City. I tell you that your Occupation is indefensible. Ry E. (Shows paper). Why, 1 am only drawing caricatures for my | child. ean >. Your oceupation of Rome, Sire. You understand me per- well. The E, Who misunderstands lucidity personified ? Mr. P. 1 am all that, no doubt. But I repeat my question, and I demand a response. The B. Amen! Mr. P. What do you mean by that? The E. (mildly). That is a response, I believe. At least I have always understood so from the priests. Mr. P. Empexor ov THe Frescu, or ratherof France, a dark thought strikes me. Is it possible that oe have not made up your mind upon the course you are to adopt? If so I think you ought to be ashamed of yourself. if you are im doubt, it is well I came, I will direct you as 4. “ +> . De Morwy my racing. Mr. P. Does he? 1 wish your Imperial Stableshi are dexterous, Sire, but I return to the and J again and again until I have elicited the truth. going to take ? The EB. For my return to Paris? There is but one. We do not waste mouey on half a dozen railways to the same place, like certain islanders. The South-Western. Mr. P. 80n of Quezs Hortense, would you do me the favour to much joy. You design to do so What line are you avoid levity when we are speaking on a grave subject. The B. We? You. Mr. P. yen, but you chal k on it also before I have done with you. _—— , Lam l It > te. - +} A as it is inue occu, Rome. uu intend to bring ee “s The FE. Rome? Yate forbid . P. y) The E. (smales). Of the temporal dominions of We Holiness the Pors. Mr. P. Bah, bat what do you mean by invoking aboat Rome ? The E. You asked me, my valued friend, whether | intended to destroy Rome, or you used words to that effect. Mr. P. When the Artful Dodger dies you shall be Dodger, though I had promised the place to your friend Dizzy. Are you not going to let m¢ into your confidence; me, Puach, your teuest and best ally P a Iam. Pardon me that I have hesitated, but it was in the hopes of gaining from your wisdom some new light upon my situation. ir. P. {biushing), Nay, I am sure that I shall be but too happy, Sire, to afford you any new light in my power. oe You can give me much. Would you touch the spring of that Mr. P. (does so. The blind flies up). Well, Sire ? The B. (smiles) You see, | did not over-rate your ability. Mr. P. By Jove! But Yul keep | temper. The EB. \t is always well todo so. In reward for your heroic effort, walk up-stairs and see the Empress, and tell her that you are coming to dinner. And she will show you the child. If you are good natured, you will tell him a story. Mr. P. (with profound intention). Shall I tell him that the child of the First Naroteon was King " The BE. (with intense explosion.) Ha! You have—but no matter, no matter. to the Empness, my dear friend, go to the Express. { Rushes out. Mr. P. He has dashed into the sea with his clothes on. But I have undressed his soul. Ha! (Is left in an attitude, considering several things, A CLERICAL CONGRATULATION. “ Dear Ponca, “ Tuere can be no doubt that the intellect of mankind is in a progressive state, and that we are much wiser than our forefachers. “This consideration has just been forced upon us, the undersigned, by the historical statements which have appeared in reference to the departure of the Nonconformist clergy from the Church of England upon the Act of Uniformity coming into operation. : “A couple of thousand clergymen (more or fewer) resigned their livings, because they would not say they believed in the whole contents of the Prayer Book. ' “ Since that time, Sir, intellect has advanced, and did those good but narrow-minded men live in our days, the Church would not need to lose their services. , ' } “ Suppose that some Essayists and Reviewers in the time of Caanies THE SeconD had made it clear to these two thousand clergymen, that in solemnly declaring their belief in the contents of the Prayer Book, | they only meant that they were complying with what was generally understood in society to be a mere form, and that they were at liberty ‘to believe as much or as little as they liked, provided that they accepted the Prayer Book in the spirit of men of the world, and did not scan- | dalise their parishes by any out-of-the-way doctrines. “ Had there happily existed such teachers im the times of the Non- | conformists, those men might just as well have remained in the Church, and her honours and emo! as “ Your obedient Servants, | “ St. Janus’s Day, 1862.” “Tue Essavists ayp Revizwens,” Scratch Matches. Some matches have been published which will ignite only in contact with the box in which they are sold. A wedded friend of ours (a brute) states that the invention reminds him of a well-bred married couple, who never fly into passions with friends or strangers, but fire up into prompt explosion with one another. He s ts that these ma should be called the Conjugals. We suggest he should be kicked. ZOOLOGICAL COMPANIONS, ‘Tne ever-active Secretary to the Zoological Society announces the | arrival of a new creature called “Aye-ave” A letter from the Vatiown informs us that another curious creature called “ No so,” is mot wulikely | to be hastily exported to Kagland. Could not Ds. deLaten arrange to exlubit both im the Kegent’s Park ?

Page 12

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL. [Serreuven 13, 1862,

- SCIENTIFIC STEALING. Tue subjoined extract from a police report | relates to a not very common offence :— ** Taames.—Yesterday, Gronoe Wattis, aged 41, « florist and gardener, was charged with stealing 500 feet of gas.” We have heard one schoolboy ask another. whistling a tune, “‘ How much is that a yard? a but in the case above quoted we fin: an air, to wit, carburetted hydrogen, measured by the foot. It is lucky for the gas companies that aériform fluids are capa!le of being measured somehow, so that a thief who steals a volume of gas may be tried and punished as effectually as the fellow was the other day for stealing books out of the British Museum Library. But when gas is superseded by electricity, how will |that be measured? It can’t be weighed, being fone of the “imponderables ;” it bas no dimen- | sions, and the electric fluid is incapable of being meted by the pint and quart. The electrometer does not divide it into quantities, but doubtless ‘invention will keep pace with discovery, and a | suitable instrument will serve to indicate the jamount of electricity which a rogue has filched from a wire. We may trust the science of the future to take care of its own. =< i j | <prneit (| 1 . | |

ee I mg ~ ne os

Obvious. Somexzopy advertises some tinted spectacles, |which he states to be used by great numbers of |\the aristocracy, “including Lorp Patmenr- ww These last words induced us imme- | diately to send for a pair, for, we like to see | everything couleur de rose, A SKETCH AT BUXTON. Showing the Awful Effects of a Season among the Crinolines at the Exhibition.

—__ — — — — —

A HOPELESS HUNT. Tue Morning Post publishes the subjoined announcement :— “ We have authority to state that the Marcniowgess or EENSBURY, who has lately become a Roman Catholic, left ber residence, near Weybridge, last week, clandestinely, taking with her the three youngest of her six fatherleas children, | and leaving no clue to her place of hiding. There is no doubt it is in the power of | the guardians and the nearest relatives of the late marquis to trace her ladyship's flight, and, through the strong arm of English law, to rescue the children and make | them wards in Chancery.” The relatives of the late Marquis may be able to trace her ladyship’s | HINT FOR AN EXPERIMENT. Tae London Magistrates are, as a rule, just, intelligent, humane gen- | tlemen, who desire to discourage, as much as possible, the crimes they |

have to punish. And they one and all declare that at least two-thirds of such crimes are committed in consequence of Drink, These pre- misses granted, does it not seem odd that the following is virtually, if not in words, the dialogue which passes day after day in our Police Courts ?

Magistrate. Prisoner, you are proved to have beaten your mother, kicked the constables, and otherwise behaved in a most brutal manner. | What bave you to say? Prisoner (doggedly). 1 know nothing about it. Magistrate. You were drunk ? I was drunk.

Prisoner. Very drunk. Magistrate. O, well, if you were drank, that makes a difference. A | drunken man dors not know what he is doing. It is very wrong of you, | however, to get drunk, and I fine you twenty shillings, which I hope | will be a lesson to you. | The prisoner immediately paid the fine, and went away, as he said, to | wop the witnesses. This is really what the usual conversation between the Magistrate and the Prisover amounts to, and the ridiculous fine is the result. But suppose (and Wr, Punch throws out the suggestion with all respect for the excellent Magistrates) the dialogue should take this turn : Magistrate. You say you were drunk ? Prisoner. Yes, I was. Magistrate. Very well, you plead guilty to that offence, and I will deal with it first. A man has no right to get drunk, because drunkenness is in itself a cri and ex him to the danger of committing other crimes. I send you to hard labour for a month for drunkenness, and when that term expired, we will take the other offences, ‘The prisoner was removed that all justice was at an end, if or what he did when he didn’t a fellow was to be treated know what he was about. Suppose this experiment were tried—it could do no harm, and it might do much good, in the way of disabusing a large mass of persons of a British belief, much promoted by authority, that drunkenness is an Extenuation. Let it become an Aggravation—as it is frequently called by Magistrates who immediately proceed to stultify their own ation. declarin like that

flight, but although they may follow her they are not likely to eateh | ver, The pursuit of a Marchioness who bas turned Papist, and flown off with her little ones, must be a wild-goose chace. JUSTIFIABLY TERRIFIED. Tue following awful apparition in the pulpit is recorded to have been lately witnessed :— “ Yesterday morning, at a Church at Forest Hill, the Communion Service was read, and the Sermon preached by a Clergyman wearing a black beard and moustache. His hair was parted down the middle.” Some of the papers that have noted this appalling fact, describe the congregation as having been “ alarmed.” nk. Penrose, and others who advocate the adorn ent of churches with pictorial works, may find an argument in such alarm. Did the terrified subur ever see & picture representing one of the Apostles? But matters may be even worse than we kuow. For if the clergyman’s doctrines were as apostolic as his appearance, the genteel conventionalists of Forest ill must not only have been alarmed, but disgusted.

Joke Made only to Warn off Correspondents. Mr. Weep, of New York, is on his way to England. We should have preferied an importation of “ Virginian Weed,” but the destiny of both is the same, a mission ending in smoke. [Do Correspondents unders We have used the weed joke, so they will let it .]

NATURAL INTEMPERANCE. Tue Total Abstinence spouters talk about toasts and sentiments being drunk without wine. So, if talking bosh is any sign of drunkenness, are most of their drinkers.

Page 13

SepremBer 13, 1862.) PUNCH, OR THE PIC-NICING UNDER THE Rorat Poticemay. “ Hullo/ I say—I sa THE JOLLY JURISTS OF GERMANY, Accorpine to “ honest Jago,” England is the country “ where indeed they are most potent in potting.” Although “your Dane, your German, and your swag-bellied Hollander” excel most other nations in that accomplishment, they “ are nothing to your English.” Whatever may have been the relative capacity of this and those other nations for drinking in the time of Saaxspzare, and whether or no “ your English,” at the present day, retain their former superiority in strength to tope over “ your Dane,” and “your swag-bellied Hollander,” there is reason to believe that now at any rate there is nobody better able to stand a considerable quantity of liquor than “your German.” The United Kingdom Alliance, established to obtain a law prohibiting the sale of fermented drinks, is a body which, being accustomed to mind other people’s business, will be naturally interested in the infor mation afforded by the following paragraph, relative to foreigners, and illustrating Teutonic prowess in potation :— “ Eleven hundred German jurists are now in Vienna. In the evening of Sunday they and 700 Austrian jurists sat down to a supper given by the municipality of the city, and the 1,390 persons to dispose of 80 casks of beer, 3,600 bottles of and white wine of the country, and 1,050 bottles of first-rate champagne. The supper with music, cigars, &c., cost the vity no less than 40,000 florins (£4,000).” _ Certainly “ your German,” as represented by these sages of the law, is at least as potent in his potting as any modern Englishman. The achievement above narrated could not have been surpassed by a sym- oe of British judges. For of course the jolly jurists did not get | ruvk, because it was Sunday, and besides any symptoms of intoxication exhibited by them would have been noted, for fan. No doubt they were as sober as-judges, as we say, meaning by the sobriety of a judge the state of qd gumaalan which a judge retains after | taken wine enough to make several ordinary men drunk. If they had talked | nonsense, the Press would have published it ; but we are only told that, | after having consumed nearly £4,000 of wine and beer :-— | “ The Germans learned in the law have talked much since they have been in | | Vienne, but nothing worth repeating is reported.” LONDON CHARIVARI. 115 NEW POACHING ACT. y—What's them Birds in that there Pie?” The soberest legal disquisitions may be not worth repeating, We may safely conclude that the speech of the German jurists, during their crouse, consisted in utterances of the prosaic wisdom and weighty | jocosities characteristic of and suitable to personages of their ponderous | nation, and dignified profession, over their cups. No doubt they held a solemn supper, and drank an enormous quantity of wine, every one of them with a profound gravity, the centre of which never at any time | became vertical to a point outside of the base of support or chair which maintained each erudite jurist in the position of an upright judge. | The Health of the Potatoes. EXAGGERATED statements have been made of the reappearance of the Potato Disease. Under the signature of A Tunes, a correspondent thus writes: —“ They say that the blight has attacked some of us, but few are affected with anything worse than the mildest form of oplithal mia. At least, as far as | am concerned, I may venture to say that the potato-disease is all my eye.” Papal Shortcomings. Tue Pore mistakes and so disdains The impatience Rome is showing : Of no Short Coming she complains, No, but of his Long Going. ETHIOPIAN BLOOM. Unper the head of exports is included a quantity of walnut-ketchup, to St. Domingo. This article, for which a great demand existe in Hayti, is destined to be employed as a cosmetic by the ladies, Joxixc mv a Cracuz.—We have the authority of Mu. Barry for | saying that “the first horse-laugh must certainly have proceeded from | an Os humerus.”

Page 14

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. _(Strranen 13, 1862 PERILOUS PERFORMANCES. man from the Country now resident in Town.) had seen the Wo Leoranp, and t was, by Jove! a racter. for seeing suicide ? have their nerves and lim night prove fatal. With all their skill of nature; and, to say nothing of the fact that ropes are not infallible and by acci will break, pray what human skill ean guard against those physical contingencies which every human frame is heir to? A sudden cramp or spasm, or a momentary giddiness, would suffice to stretch the acrobat a corpse upon the floor, and make every spectator feel as though he had been an accessory to manslaughter. Besides, performers are in no means so well skilled as Leotarp and Bionprs ; but while there is a craving for “sensation” ae — — of course there a be ae —. iy does net them, # y at a price to put their necks in nightly q Masic H ~ Lee ge ny see the —— a, oe sequence he pockets, say, his twenty isa night, depend on it his feats will be copied more or less by Mueerxs the Miraculous, or the Bounding Bucains. Now, the trapéze, at first sight seems innocent whic! ng set in motion, the performer grasps in passing, and swiftly flies along from one bar to another without touching the ground. But exciting as his flight in mid air seems at first, spectators soon get ti of seeing the same thing; and when its novelty wears off, the dish has to be spiced with a dash of some more danger in it; and so trapéze- erformers practise summersaults and turnings and tumblings in their ights, and nightly introduce fresh perils in their play-bill, until the climax of attraction and of danger too is reached. ‘all may go on safely until ae some evening, excited by applause, the performer tries a feat which he has barely practised. There is a slip—a fall—and then the strong man is picked up a bleeding, senseless, huddled heap, and perhaps a wife and family are left without support. Now, 5 vente not undervalue wate of strength - skill, ner the courage that is needed to practise and perform them. An acrobat must have no ordinary plack, or he could never face the dangers of the fours de force required of him; and as an Englishmau, of course I can’t help liking pluck, wherever | may find it. Still I think that in such exploits as those of M. Browpus and those of the trapeze, there is more risk than is allowable for human beings to incur, unless there be a vital reason for their doing so. A soldier mounts a breach, or a sailor goes aloft in the midst of a typhoon, because it is their duty to their lives in peril, But these things are exceptions, and are not daily for mere sake of exhibition, and that crowds may go and gape at them. Again, there is great danger in well nigh every field t. A bold rider is fortunate if he escapes a broken neck, and, with the modern catapultive round shot style of bowling, a cricketer thank his lucky stars if he suffer nothing worse than being black and , getting money, (Another Confidential Letter to Tom Tunstrtorre, Esquinn, @ young Y pear Tom,—I heard B feels i Rn bet night that you LowDIN a pleasure brutal exhibition, and hold up our hands jn wonder, that gently-nurtured plucky fellow. You also said something in praise of | brute life which is threatened ; whereas in the trapeze and M. Bron- a feminine ptw’s case, the sole risk that attracts is that of a man’s neck. Yet whom you poi 882 | iadies highly-born have flocked to such ‘ormances, and have sat at the ‘ton with rather enjoyment than disgust. And can you think throu No doubt too ve seen i i i 2 i pi Fate on the they + 80 without some mental detriment? Do you not imagine that i and considered as one of /nature? | an artis Sees ae | sight of life nou Se dually the sense of pity it should waken, omy differ and are not to | tender-hearted beings after ing to a course of Perilous Performances, for, and what would see an accident to limb or life without feeling much sorrow ; and one man thinks usting | would regard it rather less as a misfortune than a fault. If a man fell another finds enjoyable. But a i ‘+ & Jing ness and not pity the mishap 5 and instead of feeling sympathy, and these performances, you are aiding and abetting to put human life in danger, and encouraging, may be, a taste | ’ 18 aged young man who has a score of years of memory must recollect very well to say that men | rope-walkers at Vauxhall and Cremorne, who went nearly if not quite like Leorarp and Bton- \1o0 the same height as M. Browprx; and men whose heads do stoop a DIN, by constant practice, | little on their shoulders, and the shadow of whose waistcoats is more completely in control, and ‘make her “terrible ascent,” surrounded by a what were death to you oF | crackers. me, to them has little danger. 1 grant you that the peril is much | lessened by their usage to it, but the mr still exists, and may any and practice, Monsteurs Leo- TARD and Bionpin cannot make themselves proof against the freaks | amg It simply is a series of swinging bars, a dozen yards apart, | h i courage to the test. The risk ing an unhealthy excitement to a mob. Moreover, in the hunting field as well as in the cricket one, there is a ure to those ied that far outweighs the peril. But, with his nonchalance work, who believes that M. in or that M. Leorazp is not glad to get to supper without a broken ? Another reason why I object to these performances is beca f their unhealthy cist ee spectators. We calla Spanish bullfight a ladies can affect to take delicht in it. But in a bull-fight it is mainly aceustoming the eye to such exciting sights blunts and blights the better feelings of the heart, and hardens all the tender sympathies of lieve that, man or woman, whoever is accustomed to the and grows callous to t t of human suffering and pain. The most from a ladder, or a jockey from a horse, they woald criticise the clamsi- erying “Ob, r creature ! os What a step maf! 4 Perhaps you say you are only doing what your forefathers have done in going to see feats like those of Lzoranp and Buowpix. Well, grant you there is nothing very new in their performances. Any middle- would be more inc to out | convex than of yore, can tell how Mapame Saqui used every ight to halo of flying squibs and of n eahiog that appe no more let my girls attend these erilous Performances than I would allow them to go and see a prize- fight. But as I said, tastes differ; and the crowd that thronged the Crystal Palace when Buowpry first performed was one of the most fashionable ever there assembled, and quite as many ladies as gentlemen were present. Strange as it may seem, it has been ever thus, as any one well up in history can vouch. Still, within the last half-century we in England have been bragging about our March of Intellect, an boasting of the strides that Education has been taking with its seven- league stepping boots. There arises then the question—After all, does Edueation in reality refine? The love of Perilous Performances so rainpant still among us is merely a new form of the old ome gusto with which the bloody Cireus scenes were relished in old Rome. We lift our eyes in pious horror at the cruelties wherewith the heathen matrons were wont to feast their eyes, but how many highborn mothers in = Christian land have brought their girls to see (perhaps) a broken neck | Whether the taste for quiet pleasures is dying out among us, killed y the excitement of the battles fought in business, now that the money-getting mania is infecting every brain, I leave to other r with more leisure to inquire. But there is certainly a growing taste for pleasures spiced with peril (such as M. Buonpiy’s — cooked on his high rope), and to my thought this is clearly a vitiat appetite, betokening a most unhealthy state of palate, ove which y a strong purgative of common sense can cure. I would say my dear Tom, that the less that you or any other yo man from the country go to places of amusement with the chance suicide, the better it will be for you and those with whom you have to do. When you are in Spain, y's Sonar see please; and go to see a bull-fight, and what brutal sports you like. But do not carry home your relish for Perilous Performances, or, by giving them ne pat encourage their existenee. It is surely hardly p doar a well-bre Christian gentleman to show a taste for seeing necks put needlessly in peril, and visit places where his presence may stimulate performers to commit sensation suicide, or at least to get their living by what is very likely to bring about their death. ; ‘ I remain, my dear boy, your Mentor, and I hope you will not think tormentor, PaNce. It is not the novelty but the rome still to attract. I would Behind his Age. A Warren in Oxce a Week says that whatever may have been the short-comings of the Porsg in other there is no denying that he has earnestly promoted the celebrated Vatican manufacture of Mosaics. blue. But these are healthy sports, 2nd are none the worse to my mind In fact, the Pore might not now be under notice to quit, had his Holiness been as attentive to Christian as to Mosaic work. for the danger there is in them, which puts a man’s endurance and is not incurred for the mere sake of

Page 15

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL—Szpremper 13, 1862. f z 20 rd bs ys P 8 RACE AND FIELD CALLAGHAN, ‘ie g tes eth fritt seen may be had can ad Som, at the following Railw = Ashford Hitchin Bangor poe Birmingham ] Bogbtoa Camoriége Coester vero Se. ¢ wv ichestes ” Tithebarn St. Malvern Link ¢ Coyecal Palace Manchester reet, W. . N.B. Opera iavented and Wiertaapea, for the Ld pie by same eminent makers, Cata- Elen of which ‘may be had thee on appleation. TERNATIONAL EXHIBITION CLASS 7., 4 ' ‘ m1 aneaner ae thea seten _ PERFECT FOR ALL KINDS OF WORK. LE ROOMS, 139,RECENT ST LONDON, ACCIDENTS (ARE U ARE UNA- oa —Ev fore provide aa them. ayer way Las. eae A “ESsURANCE COMP: * fh aguinet ACCIDENTS OF ALL KINDS. -t- For Forme of Proposal, &c.. ieee cial Agents, or to the Head Office o4, Corohi es Wisrsam J. Vian, GARDNERS 2 : 220 DINNER 4 ATION AL EXHIBITION.— TER, as exhibited in his Foun- tain, sy - Perfamer to the Queen, Strand, aed Cornbill , Lendea, aol 7 edo des Teaaiees, Paste Roz NSON’ T BARLRY, for making quickly aud at Bariey + mall cost superior ROBINSON'S PATEN ROATS, the most esteemed and dest known preparation for making pure Gruel. Prise Medal, International Exhibition, THOMSON’S PRIZE MEDAL SKIRTS. (oMFORT, ELE- Lateat “Part ECONOMY, Style. and the Prescribed by the most eminent Medical Men throughout the world as the safest, speediest, and most effectual remedy for pos haga CHRONIC BRONCHITIS, ASTHMA, COUGHS, RHEUMATISM, GOUT, DEBILITY, DISEASES OF THE SKIN, nas $M INFANTILE WASTING, AND ALL SCROFULOUS AFFECTIO Is wncomparably Swperwor to any other al FROM “THE } LANCET.” “Some of the deficiencies of the Pale Oil are attributable to the method of its aration, and ly to its filtration through . IN THE PREFERENCE OF THE ee BROWN OVER THE PALE Off WE FULLY CONCUR. We have carefully tested of Da. oe Jowon's Light Brown Cod Liver Oil. We find it to be guanine, 20d sah to jodine and the elements of the bile.” Da. pe Jovon’s Licut-Brows Cop Lrver Ort is sold only in merentat half-pinta, %. 6d.; pints, 4s. 9d. ; quarts 9s. ; capsuled and labelled with his stamp and signature, wiTaeuT waicu HOSS CAM POSSIBLY BS GENUINE, by respectable Chemists. Sole Consignees:—ANSAR, HARFORD & Co., 77, Strand, London, W.O. CAUTION.—Beware of Proposed Substitut utions. he Homoopathic Sociitmne and the Medical Pro feasion gual, recommend Cocoa as being the most hea!thful of all beverages. When the doctrine of Homeo pathy was first intro- duced into this country, there were to be obtained no preparations of Cocoa either attractive to the taste or acceptable to the stomach ; the nut was either supplied in its crude state, or so unskilfuily manufactured as to obtain little notice JAMES EPPS, of London, Homm@opathic Chemist, was induced in the year 1839, te turn bis attention ty this subject, and at lengtn succeeded, with the assistance of elaborate machinery, in being the first to produce an article PUR« in its composition, and so refined by the perfect tritu- ration it receives in the process it passes through, as to be acceptable to the delicate stomach, and am “DESIRABLE BREAKFAST BEVERAGE, FOR GENERAL USE, EPPS’S COCOA IS DISTINGUISHED FOR DELICIOUS AROMA, GRATBFUL ancsniiin, and INVIGORATING POWER And to these qualities it is indebted for the adoption it now obtains as a BREAKFAST BEVERAGE. in a breakfast cnp, two tea-spoonfuls of the Powder with as much coLp poiLine Mile, or Milk and Water in equal DIRECTIONS.—Mix, Milk as will form a stiff paste; then, FILL UP with portions, or Water i Ib., 4 Ib., and 1 Ib. Packets, at 1s. 6d. per Ib. Sold in labelled Packets only, by Grocers, Confectioners, and Druggists, in every town throughout the United Kingdom. MANUFAC rORY: LONDON. — Se, ANNOUNCEMENT. METALLIC PEN MAKER TO THE QUEEN, BY ROYAL COMMAND, JOSEPH GILLOTT to inform the Commercial World, Scholastic Institutions, and the IMPORTANT BESS most respectfully with carrying moqual to fur apna ne i t ren ,- 7 ing coats. 07 ‘orks, th, Cornhill, Invento o” rousers without side seams, (he trousers ever made.—Vide the Sun, can be diepemerd with, & ing coo ent principles, and U ndress Vests the latest and Vide the Globe, Feb. is, ~ MENILE Sy » % SAMUEL BROTHERS, 29, Ludgate Hill. ; ~ 3,148,000 or ~ sanasrene ALPACA” UMBRELLAS, hich they have been again awarded « PRIZE MEDAL, have been made ender their Patent, These Um brellas may be had of all Dealers, and should have Labeis bearing the words “ Sanoerear’ Avraca Goods of their own Manufacture having the w: verd “ Makers.” W.& J. Sancornn, Patentees, 40, Regent Street “, Stree vr ihagal | Bechanee : Tb, Cheapaide PIESSE & LUBIN’S | New Perfume for 1862, | SWEET FRADE and HIRE IONS _. eEmeepae itn at Lowest Prices mee > Blown Cras a ion of his unrivalled Machinery for making Stee! Pens, and in mtroduced a ssw sastes of bis useful product! which, for sxca.- 26 tm raion, be believes wil) ensure ‘orks, G Ot i No. 91, JOHN OnN brke get, wT YORK ; and at 87, QRACECHURCH STREET, LONDON, B.C. SECOND HAND SILVER PLATE. 222, REGENT STREET, LONDON, AND 67, & 68, KING WILLIAM STREET, LONDON BRIDGE. MAPPIN BROTHERS MAKE THE MOST LIBERAL ALLOWANCE FOR OLD SILVER PLATE, EITHER FOR CASH OR IN EXCHANGE | FOR GOODS. [HE POCKET SIPHONIA DEPOT— EDMISTON AND 808, Sole M of the 120s. Waterproof Coat for in guccetes eS 2 matt . Krom 42s., all silk a, to vogueal, ks tor Tourista, 18s. 6d. FISHING STOCKINGS, 21s. to 25s. per pair. 5, CHARING OROSS, late 69, STRAND. N°. CEtelares aeiek _ ARMS, rR, st A. G, BAERR | m1 LOPES, 44. laid ote, full-sise, Ove NA Rae en Wen « and aritaae, the aie ited s Set PLATE ELEGANTLY ENGRAY CaRps ist anes my TE reo Daoune well known Establiomment , @, Piecad@illy, twe dont. + ot, - —~ SIMPSON & Co, ) WHIP MANUFACTURERS, 314, Oxford Street, Loadvn. = Saddiere im every Country Towo assortment of the following ~y~y etware see ees beetle, dow ie ~~ raere, Leaning coipet ores, to0r tourist kegs, Virdealis, ae Us AND AL MIA AI Bean MAIR DYE es or Wack tis apgh haeke. vemtion va easy, “~: Matr being eolowres 7, Drs Cot of we & Me —, Picendiliy rapes MAGNESIA at oe rp hy Saantere. Beotl econ antisense npovien! ioe a ; ond oll Chemistsl TROUBLED WITH A aotnn YOU '—Taze DR. TWEEDALE PILLS, the finest tonic restorative ever com

Page 16

pao a ne ee - Ee ee © ——— PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARL—Serremner 13, 1862. MR. JOHN LEECH’S GALLERY OF SKETCHES IN OIL. FROM SUBJECTS IN “PUNCH.” EXHIBITING AT THE EGYPTIAN HALL, PICCADILLY. 1A pase HOME AFTER A BLANK DAY. 27 A FRIENDLY MOUNT.—Party (whose nerve is not what & 51 THE GOOD LITTLE BOY.— Woman. “ Maste 2 MR. JORROCKS (loqg.) —"' Come hup! I say—you ugly used to be). *‘ You are quite sure, Charles, that he's tem- Franky wouldn't cry! no! not he —He "ll come to hig beast |" 1*—Charls. “‘Ob, yes! come along! Do you think Martha, and bathe like a man !” 8 THE MERMAIDS’ HAUNT should let you ride him if he wasn’t? Why you miight | 52 LITTLE GENT.—*‘ Mornin’, my Lord !—Glad to see you 4 PHYSICAL EDUCATION ill the horse!” out again !—What I like about fox-'unting is, that it im. & ACAVALIER, 1860. —Adolphus. “ Now, girls !-it you're [Nervous Party is much flottered by the consideration of Friend. proves the breed of oo « a brings people together » for a ride on the sands—I‘m your man.” |S eo his new hack, which is as quiet as a lamb— wouldn't otherwise meet 6 ow be ps -~* —— yer to swim? Zor’ bless | dant 53 MISS MATILDA —-‘ Go ym Fido !|—There’s one great yer, ™ of course | can ' | 20 ENE 2 1 SANDBATH.—The Female Blontin outdene! draw-back to these hate—they make one lod. Ukaevery. 7A afl oH act wi DAY AT THE SEA-SIDE. | cua Performance on the Narrow Plank by = " (Ahem * MASTER OF HOUNDS.—“ Now, you Sir! the Darling * * * * * 54 Skerc AT na SGATE —Bllen (who loos @ joke Panes tty Me’ 8 worthorty times . much as | 30 COUNTRY RACBS.—Gentlemen Riders, who are so ike sunt Pidget's exp-nae). ** Good gracious, i Fit ice Professional Jocks, ean hardly tell the difference ! two officers | '—Aunt Fidget (a short-sighted “ Blew Reader is to observe, that the Lower Ex- | 31 WHILE THEY ARE AT SCARBOROUGH, Paterfamilias me, so there are! Well; they —> "or they, wouldnt p above do n-t belong to the Fair | thinks his : ones ought to lose no opportunity of | are not gentlemen, I'm er eo on Plank, but to the Boatman beyond, upon drinki waters ! looking at us in that — whose shoulder she is leaning. —We, however, recommend | 32 THE pr 8p PREVENTIVE.AGAINST SFA-SICKNESS.— 55 —— GENTLE N DISTURBED BY BLUE Flora to be more careful how she composes herself the Once on board, fix your ¢ pon some distant object, and BOTTLE. next time she out of a boat. Wc pete sy tothe relling of the vessel. 56 A CAPITAL FINISH. —Bzcited but rather betind-hand Party, 10 DIVISION OF LABOUR —Sporteman (in Standing Beans) | 33 A ICIOUS SAIL —OFF DOVER —0ld Lady. “ Good- “* Now then, my man, wry seen ‘em? Which way “ Where to, now, Jack?" —Jack. “ Well! let's see! I should ness gracious, Mr. Boatman ! what's that?” Stolid Boat- — they gone?" —Man. Sir! They ‘re dows just go up the beans again , and » ‘ross the top end, beat man. “That, mum! Nothun, mum. Only the artillery Fox an’ ‘ounds is just run into we Schoo!” down the other side zw round the bottom. While prac-ti-sin’, and that 's one o' the cannon-balls what's just | 57 THE OLD FOXHUNTER.—Flora. “ Wi Ronald ! and you're there, get over and try ola Haycock's standing struck the water!” how do you like Rotten Row ?”—Renald. “ Oh, pretty oats—he won't mind—I 'll stop here and mark !” % MARRIED FOR MONEY—THE HONEYMOON —* Now, well; but it’s rather slow work to a man who has bea 11 LATEST FROM PARIS.—Seautful Being “ Well, I must | then, darling, put away your paper, and we'll have a nice accustomed to go across country, as I neve al my life!” say, Parker, that I ra hair dressed 2 I'Im mpératrice. long walk, 5 Gen come back to tea in our own little | 58 MR. BRIGGS, having become an adept in the art of hore It shows so much of the fac | cottage, and be as ba y as two little birds !" said the fair | taming, operates upon a colt he has bred himself, and~ 13 = BUT THE BRAVE DESERVE THE FAIR—| bride.—** Oh ! it mentally ejaculated the Captain. | 59 With og re Avguttus, “ Now I've got you ! 85 THE FAIR TOXOPHILITES.—Constance. ‘Oh, mamma! | 60 A JUDGE B were yy “ Bless ‘is 18 THE OPERA.—Liezy. ‘' Good gracious, Selina, look there ! I'm so delighted. I have just made the best gold, and | ‘art! 1 know'd it kindly—by the werry looks There 's t ridiculous little man again. Did you ever won the beautiful bracelet given by Captain Rifles.”— | on ’im |” seo anything s absurd 7" Lucy (disappointed). “‘ Well, Constance, | think you had | 61 MORE NOVELTY.—The Misses Weasel think crinoline + 4 Busby. “Ah! Tilere she is, bless her! and looking this better not say much about it. You know it was a fluke! gem and extravagant investion, and appear # way too. Oh! it's as clear as possivle she has taken a | for you told me you always shot with your eyes shut, as rs. Roundabout’s Peay in sone t attire fancy to me!" you feel so very nervous |’ 62 NOT A BAD IDKA FOR WARM WEA — Frederick. 15 YES. MY DEARS! I know the sea breeze after bathing is | 36 GONE AWAY !—0ld Cocchman. ‘‘ Now, Miss Ellen! Miss ‘* Now Girls, pull away—den't be idle!" beneficial to the back hair ;—but consider the heart of Ellen! You know ven your Pa said! You was to take | 63 “ DONT MOVE THERE, WE SHALL CLEAR YOU!" your too au ible Punch ! the greatest care “— Miss Bien. “So 1 will, 4 PATIENCE REWARDED. —biscat-r. “ A-hah! Got you at 16 A DELICATE COMPLIMENT.—Fira Whip (who isa little | Robert ! and that's why ~ taking him off the nasty last, have I ?—And a fine week's trouble I ‘ve had to exteh ruffled because the Fox won't break). “ Now, then, Sir! Out hard road, poor thing !” you!” o the way, unless you ll get into the cover. Mayhap | 37 SEA- SIDE —The bathing hour 65 IT’S THE EARLY BIRD THAT PICKS UP THE WORK your | ugly mug might frighten him out. Come up, | 38 , -—4 — SCIENCE.—Tomkins and his friend (who | —Piscatur. ‘ There, Thomas, you now see the ons 1" been thrown out) congratulate themselves on falling | of early rieing. I have got the way ae place on 7 ENTER MR. BOTTLES, THE BUTLER.—Master Fred. in "with the Squire's second horseman, who is sure to water, and IT a bound to say other There! that’s capital! Stand still, Bottles, and I'll bring them by a line of gates to the hounds agaiu—and so | are not out of bed yet!” 9 glitch tao ditanes dn the talib ote en ena. | he does, last of the gates is locked, and over | 66 FOR A COLD IN THE HEAD there is like « [Bottles i@ much int rested. he “ like te | steam bath, and this can be bad in your own 18 OLD DIPS declares they manage sea-bathing better in | 39 MR. PEEWIT has a little addition to his family—he is | with the greatest case— France, and that when he is at Bo long, he docs as Bo-long obliged to get his meals anyhow—and— | 67 You have only to take care that you manage the a does—well | that 's a matter of taste ! 40 Abdicates in favour of the real master of the house. paratus rly 19 PUTTING HIS FOOT IN (T.—Little Hairdresser (mildly). 41 A NICE GAME FOR TWO OR MORE. —* Pixing | 68 GORGEOUS SPECTACLE —Serah Jane. ‘ ‘ Oh, Betsy, come “Yer ‘air 's very thin on the top, Sir.” Gentleman (of un- her eyes on his, and placing her pretty little foot on the ‘ere, and bring Hisabeller! We can see the ‘oofs of the gowernable temper) *‘ My hair thin on the top, Sir? and ball, she said, ‘ Now, then, I am going to Croquet you ! ‘orses |!” what if it is! * Centeune you, you puppy, do you think I | and uet'd he was completely.” (from Rose to Bmily.)| 60 A BRILLIANT IDBA. ae. “Oh, look ye here, came here to be insulted and told of my personal defects? 42 COMMON OBJECTS AT THE SEA-SIDE—Generally found Tommy ! 8’pose wou ngeky bag be peer It as topt!" upon the rocks at low water. me and Lizzerbuth ‘ll be _ fine in 20 RUGGLES.—*“ Hold hard, Master George. It's too wide 43 DOING IT THOROUGHLY.—Old Gent. “I say, my little | 70 TABLEAU, representing Pog | gentleman who avy 2 and uneommon deep.” — Master George. ‘ All right, Rug- | ou should always hold your pony together going he is alone by the “Sad Sea Waves.” He takes the op gles! We can both swin /” up up bill, and over ploughed land! "— Young Nimrod. “ Al ory of going through the last scene of “‘ Lucia.” 21 AQUATICS—Who is this? Why this is Mr. John Chubb | right, .id cock! don't you teach your grandmother to (N.B. The Young Genti-man’s voice (which 1s imagine pulling one of his long, slow, stead * strokes. He is taking | suck ! There's my man by the hay-stack with my | b . ag Mario's) is of the most feeble and uncertain | ” more pains than usual, because thee pretty girls in the orse ‘ round hots are sitting on the lawn drawing from nature. | 44 THE ROUND HAT, LADEN WITH NOVELS, IN A 71 A WEIGHTY P MATTER. —Frederick a very big boy). “That's - — | STORM.— Ancient Mariner. “ Hold on a bit, Miss—I'll tow | a niceish pony of y urs, Charley.—By the bye, heavy 22 HERE ARB THE GIRLS IN THE ROUND HATS. | you off !—You should never carry so much sail in a sou- | are you?”—Charley “ Well, withina stone, 23 WHERE THERE'S A WILL THERE'S A WAY.—Poz- wester |" I’m sorry to say. Nae pty ol - ! J call that « nice hunting Doctor. “* Not be in time! Oh, nonsense! Send my | 45 RATHER AWKWARD FOR TOMKINS.— Young Diana. | weight. Now, I 'm ovliged to have very expensive ponies; horse on,—see my patients early, —dressin the brongham, ree, WAS Sir, if arn would be so good as to go first, and | for, with saddle and bridle, I Tdowt ride less than four —there Lam !” (and we hope he may have a good run.) po top ram would get over.” | stone two!” e,° Pap have been obliged to take the side of the car- | 46 oun PRIEN p--4 1 NODDY bw a day with the Brook- | 72 A VERY GREAT MAN.—“ Now, Collina, you roust go which the kind reader will excuse. | side Harriers.—With his usual prudence be gets a horse | out very deep, for I want to take a ‘ header.’” ps onde KI G ry JLT OF WEARING INDIAN RUBBER accustomed to the hills ! 73 DID YOU EVER a ag , Aunt ! Did you see GOLO-HES THE SANDS.—Young Jack Robinson | 47 ye at who of course doesn't think himself good looking). — | what the newspaper says about 1° — Aut. can waah hi epsgtnse to be the teuapensions of hia dante’ | y, Clara, I can't think how you can make a pet of “No! What doos it say ? read ft, child! relating foot—be mentally ejaculates, ‘* Beetle Crusher,* by Jove /” oom te = tay brute as an Isle of Skye terrier ! ” | to that wonderful event is interesting. "— Why, and flies to other climes is THe RACE FOR A BATHING MACHINE. —Alice frst, | it says that it is expected to have an effect * A vulgar and disgusting cnpeoraion. & implying that a Cop cnend, 2 Miss Toddles a bad third; and the rest no- the inferior animals! my wig ! I'd haveyou and the foot is big h, and fat enough, to hectien. | where gla look out for squalls!" (D-sguating Low- Mindet Boy ) The brutality connecting in any way ro. words with | 49 CUPID yer SEA.— Angelina (to Edwin, whow only chance is | 74 MISS STOUT. “ The worst of letting one’s back hair down the f ine Tootsi needs no comment. r fect tranquillity.) “ Edwin, dear! if you love me, go ia, thet it maukeo the young men stare so!” es o pe MR. WIGGINS has a4 fine opportunity of displaying his down into the cabin, and fetch me my scent-bottle, and | 75 MODERATION.—Piret Untergraduate. “* Hollo, Charley, politeness and ataty. . shaw! to put over my feet |” Ain't you going out to-day?”—Second Cn deryreduats A SHOCKING YOUN LADY, INDEED !—Bmily (betrothed [Epwtn's sensations are more -asity than described. } Why. no—not this morning. see | to Charla). “Oh, Charles, isn't it fun? I've beaten eccentric only a one horse man, and as I have hunted — Arthur and Julia, and I 've broke Aunt Sally’s Nose seven | * Holloa ! Police! Back water, Jack! We've | times this week, | thought I'd give him a day's rest times!" got into a nest of Swans, and they ‘re a pitchin’ into me.” | the dog-cart !” From “ALL THE YEAR ROUND,” July 5, 1862. From ‘‘THE TIMES,” June 21, 1862. i é merits of this admirable artist. For, one of SS ee that eo ee ar Men of tho becuase wih ond, of gest ef ther baye at other echosls; if the Mines with these Sessttfel lesye eves, $98 SUS 80 sees and boots; if : y bo aie eee, —— them Song sagen, auvaing ¥, brave .— country gentlemen pam A rene aly a tyme Ay he vp Rs eee may thove, Wome or in the bunting-feld with their horses and hounds, are minded to come snd will enable them to do so, go in and buy. often may we, who so changed, are to come down with our sh be able to get, in for them, a sight of see their own ta, what crowds will flock once more to that room, now node brilliant sketches fresh from the hand of one of the fertile of our English | in the Egyptian Hall, in Piccadilly, where poor ALBERT SurrH was wont to administer umorista, and one of the most remarkable artists of our school and day ! ” | to the gaiety of nations |” Open from 10 till dusk. Admission One Shilling. mir wa ~~. eee PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY.