St. Louis Post-Dispatch
November 4, 1905

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— iG, NOVEMBER 4, 1905

. rm oa ‘ LIOR Set oe eee 4 5% ‘ Vs $s 5 ; sa 5 Siti od igi Ae nie Reg Fe See ESS ta ie. 55 ij ‘ ste Vote Bet MSE Am A EW cag va wel eet al Oe > RO OA Gan ace ot AR are B BES A ON! : Sa cy ; c Cea wile The ER eg Stee Lie eS >. ~~ |S WAITING FOR HIS IDEAL. His name is Louis K. Mulford and he lives in Denver. Louis has never been kissed by a woman. Mr. Mulford is said to be of “an extremely sensi- tive nature,” an automobilist. How he has escaped

is a mystery. He says he will never be kissed until he meets his ideal. She may kiss him. Think of it, the dear. But perhaps he won’t be her ideal. That would be a dreadful complication which, perhaps, he has not duly considered. Men who wait for their ideals before permitting themselves to be kissed are devoted to love in the abstract. For love in the concrete they have no thought. But indeed they don’t wait for the ideal. When she comes they collapse. Louis K. Mulford himszlf ia no exception. His sensitive nature may become even’ more sensitive, and he may buy an even more powerful automobile. It,is of no avail. When She appears he, his sensitive nature and his automobile will go the way of all men, whether they have ideals or only common sense. od a ae Rate legislation may greatly increase the free- trade commerce between the states. hh. phi - - SUPPLY OF NAVAL TALENT. Admiral Sir Edward Seymour, who holds the high- est office in the British Navy, was asked the other day if he thought there were too many old men among the officers of the Américan Navy. “Some men are as gond at 60 as others at 45,” sid Sir Edward, “so there is no iron-clad rule about that. But if today you have an excess of officers of mature age, the situation is one that will cure itse’f, for as you strengthen the service, more young men will rise to commanding rank.” This was diplomatic; moreover, it was rational. Admiral Dewey seeme@ to forget that our navy is growing rapidly and that, therefore, the call for of- ficers of the higher grade will become louder with, every new ship which goes into commission. . If the Rooseve!t policy of naval expansion .is con- | tinued, the problem will not he, how to get rid of | superannuasted officers, but how to fiad officers of,

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any age competent for the trying duties of command. 7 = ee ! The inactivity of good citizens in politics will | doubtless be a theme long after Gov. Felk bas) passed away. The “good citizen” almost snores,

; ; ' A WORLD-LICENSE FOR CATS. : ‘The Natienal Association of Audubon Socicties, | seorning the puny efforts of sundry State Lezisla- | tures to curb the slaughter of songbirds by prohibit- | ing women from wearing them or their feathers on) their hats, is going about the matter wholesale, and. to that end has evolved a scheme tvhich is nothing | less than an inspiration. ) It is going to have all the cats in the world | licensed, if it ean. and hold their owners responsible | leneyery songbird killed by them. Me Movement, according to William Dutcher, , os ut of the iation is to be accomplished | ould derive from by “international negotiations.” Al] other great affairs of state are to be sidetracked until this shall have been done, “Benevolent assimilation” of the Filipino must be suspended for the nonce. The Japanese advance must stop. Russian freedom must wait. The songbirds of the world must be protected, and every cat in every country must be licensed, tagged and held accountable for its conduct. ‘lhis must be done through “international negotiations.” Let other great movements go hang! The cat license is the thing! ha - — a Capt. E. C. Pendleton succeeds the President’s

brother-in-law, Capt. Cowles, in command of the battleship Missouri, thus becoming an object of in- terest to all Missourians. MARS ON THE GRIDIRON. When the football teams of Battery A and the First Regiment, N. G. M., encounter one another on the gridiron Thanksgiving Day it may well be a ‘ase of Greek meeting Greek and the tug of war ‘nsuing in conformity to traditional forecasts. From time immemorial there has been a mili‘ant eud between /infantrymen and artillerymen, “mud- ‘mashers” and “caisson-climbers.” “It’s the infant y thatswin a battle!” cry the white-striped warriors. “It’s the artillery‘that begin and finish it!” retort those of the red stripe—and then fol'ows the con- tention on which their martial feud is founded. Which is the more effective arm of the service? Let ’em fight it out on the gridiron, which is any- thing but a contemptible substitute for the field of battle. An expectant community is eager to acclaim the victor—but there shouldn’t be too vivid a repro-

matter of State troops and can’t afford to lose even one. @ ht iil i i

The people do believe in a live and let live policy, but somehow they do not always vote that way. ,————_+04e BERTILLONIZE THE VOTERS. Mr. Jeptha D. Howe's plan to protect the ballot by a Bertillon System of,identification of voters reduces the whole population to a level of roguery. find it handy to have a description of voters—a height, -" weight, build, complexion, color ‘of h ir, ete zen suspected of unwholesome opinions. But in this country it does not appear to be neces- sary. A free vote and a fair count can be obtained if the election officers are free from the dominion of bosses, and ave fair personal character. « Anthropological conceits of this kind are useful practical measures to insure political good health, they lack the innocence which should characterize the proposals of the truly good commiiteeman.

ARTIFICIAL PRODUCTIO TU | From the Kansas City Coca OF STUPIDITY. Afiy dearth of ability from which the world may be suffering, says is to be ascribed not so much cultivated classes as to the artificial production of Stupidity in various ways, -nd to the incessant drain- ing from the country, which is the fit and proper brecding place and rearing ground of intellect—or the best elements of the people, to be swallowed up or deteriorated 4n the hig towns. The idea that the agricultural laborer is set apart from his followers by dullness of intellect is untenable as the. belief civilized Sir J. Crichton Browne, to the infertility of the mentally than the little yokel. The rule seems to be that the mental development of children is has- tened by city life, but soon siops short. Up to 13 or 14 years of age they are precocious, and then come to a standstill. City life at its best is bad for chil- dren, involving as it does early puberty, exciting dis- traction. sperfictality of knowledge, insufficient rest, and the want of soothing influences which the coun- try altords

LAND THIEVES ON THE RUN. From the Cleveland Leader. It is probable that the biggest thieves in the Gov- ernment land frauds in Oregon will never be found out. Belief is gaining ground that Senator Mitchell, who was convicted of participation in the Knavery, was not one of the principals, but merely a high- grade tool. Certain it is that the investigation of the stealing and the subsequent prosecutions have broken up the conspiracy and thoroughly frightened every- one implicated in it. Already about 20,000 acres of Government land in the eastern part of the State have been abandoned by the locaters, who thereby. virtually confessed that they were mies.”’ | LETTERS FROM THE PEOPLE COLISEUM AND ARMORY. To the Editor of the Pott-Dispatch. Will you permit a reader of your valuable paper to ask whether the contemplated Coliseum and "Armory is tu ine‘ude a home for our citizen soldiers, the vol- unteers who answered the call to arms in the Span- ot tae gi ages At or af it to be the headquarters ‘y ¢ t ery continge - § ,ouis Na- tional Gusrd? y gent of our St. Louis Na f we are to at last have a complete armory. as other cities have, to houseind ccre for our home militia, then St. Louisans Mould be proud to aid in t Tacs movement, but let it be understood that the First regiment has equal rights in this armory. Now !s the time to fortify against having our volunteers turned out-of doors for lack of decent quarters, as has been done since they ret ‘dum-~

brought back to St. from Camp Alger—give them-a chance to benefit by this m.ovement for an armory by making it to in- clude al’, SPANISH-AMBRICAN WAR VETERAN, MISERABLE TURTLES. To the Editor of the Post-Dispatch, Why ao managers of t . outside their noes? i eee tn the public with the

(Wf course they wish to impress in: s'dewalk, I Ltertisement. anitwnals, the better, think the display is a mighty poor ad- SQUEAMISH. A VOICE FROM KIRKWOOD. To the Editor of the Post-Dispatch. The citizens of our suburban cities and towns hich! s . ‘ ghiy me renee the efforts you are making in your vate able paper to abolish the bridge arbitrary. We are as citizens more deeply graieful for the support you are giving to the free bridge movement as against one or more free wagon bridges. It costs us to have laid down at Webster Groves or Kirkwood 4 cents per ton more in carload lots, for every bushel of coal we burn than is paid for same in East St. Louls. Most of our citizens who live in these and other subur- ban towns do business in St. Louls. A few of them as shippers might be in a small way benefited by a free wagon bridge, but the great mass of them would receive no benefit at all from wagon bridges, as the haul is too long for mule teams. Moreover, you city is building toward us at a rapid rate and the time may come sooner than we expect when we may be absorbed by your great city. A long term bond issue would possibly put us in the category of debtors. If so the benefits we would receive would more than counterbalance our part of the Indebted- ness. Furthermore, if auch bonds were issued in small denominations within the reach of us all our civic pride wou!d prompt many of us to invest in them. Such investment even at a smal! rate of in- terest would a good and safe investment aside from the material nefits which every household this great enterprise. SUBU CITIZENS. + Ne a a me

duction ofsgrim-visaged war’s wrinkled front, be- | cause Migsouri is elready “shy” numerically in the | }

have “ ° » Such a scheme might work well in Russia, under | the new. constitution. The Czar’s Minister might | With the populace of the empire so carded and cata- ! logued it would be easy to keep track of every citi- | toys for spectacled men of science to play with. As |. i; him. that the city urchin is clever and better endowed |

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; urned from the late war. | . fyon't forget the fever-stricken heroes that were | ' Louls from Chickamauga and |

display live turtles | GOT THE. DROP.

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A Moment for Reflection.

a ae Don’t SHOOT YOu MIGHT HURT THE LITTLE os: . 7 43 : o.. eine " i ee ee oe , ; * > $3 ¢ - - % pi be a! > = As 7 cae ~The > Ae ena A ae r c B aM PETE ; ae with : = ‘ es me SS p = . bh Fas Beets vif ’ ae eS - 4 Sgt . . 4 Set iad + a Sa ee DY saa ag pe. > Sey Kae . - y sh v 4 see aa yb a8 ue , ; a ae ae ae, lak) =f « ea ES I : f Pe B ‘a . 7 2 Ano ee eng Se ee 4 ; eee ilies ae Bs 4 . e .. ¢ Objects to the Hammer Club and Moves, Yes, A pe - ‘e nd - 4, t ‘ e AS “Yes, a-g-a-ain!’ Why didn’t I pay ir vance? You know mighty well that 1 ¢ 6 T: ehanged my boarding house!

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— The Poor Policy Holder!

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JUST A MINUTE With the Post-Dispatch Poets and Humorssts.

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NO STORK FOR THEIRS. In Abyssinia ‘tis a sin ; For any man to tell How many chil-der-ene within One lonely cottage dwell. Race suicide don’t worry them, And Menelik, the King, In fiery languAge wouid condemn A mention of the thing. There ’tis a sin which they eschew To mention one or many; Here ’tis a sin—says Roosevelt—to Confess you haven't any. THE CZAR’S DIARY. ST. PETERSBURG, Nov. 4.—Further extracts from the remarkable volume found in Peterhof by the pol.ce are printed here today as follows: “Tl fear that I am losing favor with Witte. He did not ask me to shine his boots this morning. What can it mean. I’m sure I have done my best to please Last night I had a most unpleas- ant experience. Being no longer an autocrat I thought could safely take a walk in the Nevsky Prospect. I was strolling along, eating a hot tamale and meditating on the simple life, when a policeman stopped me. He slapped the left hand rear pocket of my trousers to see if I had a weapon, and then he took me to the nearest statéon, where I was held for the chief. was re- leased this morning after being 20 hours in the holdover They thought I was a spy for the aristocrats. | “This police force is a new thing. I understand that it fs recruited from the ranks of the plain people and that each member is réquired to join a political organization celled the Gorky Club. “These be strange times in Russia. I don't think I'll like my new job.” JOHNNIE’S ERROR. “Run to the grocer’s mother says To Johnnie as he passes The kitchen on the run, “‘and ge A gallon of molasses.’’ Wee Johnnie takes the jug and goes— For play he’s fairly itchin’— But presently returns and sets It down inside the kitchen, “Had none?” The mother views Wee Johnnie through her glasses. “Nay,” Sald the youth. saw This sign: vou say. O. MOLASSES. t ‘Sskidoo! Skidoo!’’ the mater says, "As fast as you can go, sir! Heed not this sign, young man, but do Your talking to the grocer!” Burglar (blowing): Did you send in an i | alarm? fact that the soup is the real | sig Fut I can never order turtle soup after see- | these miserable creatures lying half dead on the | If we are compelled to eat the flesh of less said, heard or seen about it the |

| Citizen (shaking) Yes, there's a po- liceman in the house. THE WIT OF WITTE> Novody works but Witte, Hie humps around all day, P Cleaning up the city, , Carting the dead away. The Czar is writing letters Tc his old friend, Empress An. Nobody works in Russia But that Witte man. It is not the club to which the police- man belongs, but the club which be- longs to the policeman that is causing troub’e these days, THOSE OLD-TIME PHRASES. in reading of a murder. with Astonishment we gulp On being told the victim’s head “Was beaten to a pulp.” “How could that be?" You ask of me. I know not, on the dead. Go ask that wonder-working wiz, The man who wrote the head, “Ouiside |

NEW YORK EDITORIAL OPINION By Leased Wire From the New York Bureau of the Post-Dispatch. NEW YORK, Nev. 4—rne World irankly tell its reason for opposing mu- nicipal membership of public utilities in this city. “There are no insuperable obstacles in the way of the city’s franchising al- most any undertaking in municipal ownership. The fundamental objections are governmental. “The theory of municipal ownership is admirable enough. The political prac- tices of boss-ridden government consti- tute the rock upon which municipal op- eration would be sure to split. It is not the principle but the practice that is all wrony. “Of ail the great capitals of the world New York has the rottenest and most corrupt government. It is ruled by a boss, and bossism is an established in- stitution. “Municipal ownership and operation of all public utilities would place 106,- 000 voters under the boss. One voter in @very six would be an officeholder. and a cog in the system. The power of the boss would be doublefi. His oppor- tunity for theft and plumder would be multiplied ten fold. The city would be at his mercy, for more thian half of the voters would be either relatives or friends or adherents of his 106,000 of- fice-holders. “The government would go from bad to worse—from corruption to unspeak- able corruption; from boss rule to boss despotism; from ‘honest graft’ to hoot. In the end the public utilities would bé bankrupted, and the last stage of the people would be immeasurably worse than the first. ‘ “The city of New York cannot intel- ligently manage the government it al- ready has; it has never done so within the memory of any living ..an. Under

the circumstances what justification can there be for doubling misrule and pmultiplying maladministration?’’

A cable dispatch from Berlin says it cost Mr. George E. Perkins $10,000 to get Qut of St. Petersburg by special steam- wr. The Press, commenting, says: “This is a slight inaccuracy. It cost the policy hoiders of the New York Life $15,000 to get Mr. Perkins out of the Russian capital. No doubt he thinks the money is his own. Probably Mr. Perkins will not put in a bill for the trip. lt wwuid not look well in the light uf the Armstrong commiitee’s dis- closures. Five years ago it would have been charged up to the ‘patriotic ac- count’ or smothered in the fashion of the ‘Andy’ Hamilton expenses. “Put the policy. holders of the New York Life can fecl reasonably certain that the 15,000 came out of their pock- eis and went into Mr, Perkins’ long, song aro. ‘This is a very high price to pay for the job of getting Mr. Perkins back to the United Siates. The price would be extortionate if it were only $lo from the way the New York: Life policy heider looks at it. But if the New York Life policy holders were asked to pay $150,000 to keep Mr. Perkins:in Rus- sia they would probably pay the price quite cheerfully.’’ reason why Americans shou'd heed the “There is a as well as Austrians lesson taught by current events in both Russia-and n coppers, dimes. Conductors, even bad ones, have Pe bles. Let us not make their way rougher. — J.-In Wyeming, Colorado, Utah and Idaho, wo vote at all elections. In Kansas a. vote on and wiun'cipa, ‘school Michigan, a ana war Loulale in oon 1 te on questions aL, an ee ia Fa ade | . ey. ; oe ee Tes ‘ a ee 3 Pa ik , é ‘ : sai cs tin adi. |e . me wn “9 . * : ; * a } ? 3

There are other things} ‘# die os % A. Fr nd rere ‘s Aes z 4 5 a racket under my t P ¥ ® 4 A te jokes that the landlady bad about her Sunday - “Sometimes one of the fellows would say, ‘Spuds, - . why don’t you take Miss Meggens to the theater — You know she wants to go.’ / ae , “‘Sure, U1 take her’ Spuds would say, ‘T'ye got” for she probably really did want to go—Oh, no, not ud to get familiar with me. I wasn’t feeling very well — yesterday morning when I went down to break- — fast, anyhow. He asked me if it took me until 2 a. m. to put Lemp out of business and | told him : : f td “es ms rok ax. ot, RULES—One question: one initial. No bosiness addresses | | sdreee A. M-—Secretary df the Treasury, Leslie M. Shaw - of luwa Mg J. M.—We do not recall Thanksgiving occurring eee ROY.—When indications point te of] and gason + an

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