23.2: Choosing Strong Verbs

Exercise 23.2a: Choosing Strong Verbs

Consider the rough draft paragraph below and its revision. Highlight the verbs in the sentences as you read.

Rough Draft Paragraph: Helen Keller is a famous person today but is only known for her disability. Helen Keller was a person with a disability, but she was also a political activist, writer, and scholar. She was also known for lecturing on her ideas. People are generally aware of Keller’s journey to acquire language with her teacher, but fewer people are aware that she later learned to speak. At age twenty-two in 1903, Keller’s autobiography (The Story of My Life) was published which detailed her education, but her next published book in 1913 advocated socialism. Keller was lecturing around the nation, and her trips showed her that much blindness and deafness was coming from industrial accidents and other side effects of industrialization; Keller was convinced that socialism would help with these social ills and help to decrease the number of people dealing with disabilities. Helen Keller was also an advocate for women’s suffrage and birth control rights and visited over twenty countries during her time as an international advocate for individuals with disabilities. In 1933, she was also one of the first Americans to speak out against the Nazi party in print when she wrote an editorial criticizing their book burnings. Clearly, Keller achieved much more in her life that she should be remembered for.

Revised Paragraph: Even though most Americans simply know Helen Keller as a person with a disability, she was also a political activist, writer, and scholar, as well as a lecturer. People know the story of Keller’s journey to acquire language with her teacher, but fewer people know that she later learned to speak. Keller published her first and most famous book which detailed her education and early life,The Story of My Life, at the age of twenty-two in 1903, but her themes evolved past her biography to social issues, and her next book advocated socialism. During her trips around America to advocate for individuals with disabilities, she found that industrialization and industrial accidents caused much deafness and blindness; Keller was convinced socialism could cure such social ills and decrease the number of people dealing with disabilities. Helen Keller also advocated for women’s suffrage and birth control rights, and visited over twenty countries during her time as an international advocate for individuals with disabilities. In 1933, she also became one of the first Americans to speak out against the Nazi party in print when she wrote an editorial criticizing their book burnings. Clearly, Keller achieved much more in her life that she should be remembered for.

Exercise 23.2b: Reflecting on Verb Choice

Consider the rough draft paragraph below and its revision. Highlight the verbs in the sentences as you read.

1. In what cases are the “to be” verbs retained? Could the author use another verb in those instances? What conclusions cab you draw about when it is effective to use “to be” verbs?
2. Look at the verbs that were changed from a form of “to be” to a more specific verb, and consider how the author came up with the new verbs. Where did they look, and what did they consider?
3. What tactics did the author use other than simply replacing “to be” verbs in order to better the verb choice of the paper?