# He Won’t Date Single Moms… Then Kittie Turned the Question on Him | Tonight’s Conversation

An episode of [Tonight’s Conversation Podcast](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/6818243128), 19 Sep 2026, 8:47.

Audio: https://mcdn.podbean.com/mf/web/ippihhua38e2neaq/yt_video_hcYnvcmuotI_bg6nra.mp3

He doesn’t have children, and he doesn’t want to commit to a woman who does. But when he asks why men get criticized for that preference, the panel challenges what’s really behind the backlash. The audience member says he’s tried dating single mothers and realized the responsibility wasn’t for him. What follows is a heated debate about dating preferences, the demands of becoming a stepparent, and the difference between choosing who you want and tearing down everyone you don’t. The panel recognizes the men who show up for children who aren’t their own. Then Kittie draws on her experience as a single mother—and turns the conversation back on the man asking the question. Where’s the line between having a dating preference and disrespecting the people you wouldn’t date? 🎬 WATCH FULL EPISODES Watch full Tonight’s Conversation episodes and exclusive conversations on Tonight’s Conversation On Demand: https://app.tonightsconversation.com/sAyv/uw5alk57 🎟️ SEE TONIGHT’S CONVERSATION LIVE Experience the conversation in person. Check upcoming tour dates and get your tickets here: https://acemetaphor.shop/collections/live-events 🃏 PLAY THE TONIGHT’S CONVERSATION CARD GAME Bring the conversation home with the official Tonight’s Conversation Card Game: https://acemetaphor.shop/collections/tonights-conversation-cards Subscribe for more full conversations, relationship debates, audience questions, and unforgettable moments from Tonight’s Conversation Live & Uncut. #TonightsConversation #SingleMoms #DatingPreferences #SingleParents #DatingDebate #StepParents

## Transcript

[0:00] As a single man who doesn't have any
[0:01] kids, why do we catch criticism for not
[0:04] want to commit to a woman who has kids?
[0:07] >> \[cheering\]
[0:09] >> Kira, what's up?
[0:11] >> Okay, so here's the thing.
[0:14] It's not that y'all catch criticism from
[0:16] not wanting to date a woman who has
[0:17] kids. It's that because when you don't
[0:20] want to date this woman who has kids,
[0:21] you interfere with other people wanting
[0:23] to date her and try to push the
[0:24] narrative that if she's not your type,
[0:26] she shouldn't be anybody else's type,
[0:27] too.
[0:28] We never get mad when anybody talks
[0:30] about the things that they like. It's
[0:32] when the conversation becomes that
[0:33] nobody should want to be with y'all
[0:35] single mothers do we start getting the
[0:36] backlash, right? Because if you don't
[0:38] want to date women with kids, guess
[0:40] what? DON'T DATE WOMEN WITH KIDS.
[0:43] \[screaming\]
[0:43] But the conversation IS NEVER
[0:46] GEARED TOWARDS WHO YOU ACTUALLY want to
[0:48] date. It's always the energy pushed back
[0:50] towards the women that you don't find
[0:51] appealing because you can't understand
[0:53] why other people would.
[0:55] >> Now,
[0:57] >> It's not that one thing, too. I've tried
[0:59] them, too.
[1:00] >> You tried them?
[1:01] >> Tried them.
[1:01] >> What's the What's the problem? First of
[1:03] all, think about carefully
[1:05] the words you're about to say.
[1:07] >> I've tried them.
[1:08] >> WHY DON'T YOU LIKE DATING single moms?
[1:11] >> I GOT ONE ARM ALREADY.
[1:15] ALL RIGHT. OKAY. OKAY. OKAY.
[1:18] I've tried them for different reasons.
[1:20] They're not bad people at all. Let me
[1:22] say that right now. They're not bad
[1:24] people.
[1:25] Same way I'm not for somebody else, they
[1:28] just not for me. I tried it. They say
[1:30] they don't like IT UNTIL YOU TRIED IT. I
[1:31] TRIED IT. I DIDN'T LIKE IT.
[1:32] >> WHY? WHY?
[1:34] >> BECAUSE you know what? It was a lot of
[1:36] responsibility. I was like, you know
[1:38] what? Am I built for this? AND I WAS
[1:40] LIKE, NO, I'M NOT BUILT FOR IT.
[1:42] >> All right.
[1:43] This \[ __ \] crazy, right? So, listen. LET
[1:46] BEFORE WE BEFORE WE LET HIM DO THIS TO
[1:49] HIMSELF,
[1:52] >> \[laughter\]
[1:53] >> LANCE, I'M GOING TO I'M GOING to toss
[1:54] you
[1:56] a very
[1:57] softball question here to get you warmed
[2:00] up.
[2:03] Do you feel like some men
[2:06] get demonized for their preferences,
[2:08] though?
[2:10] >> Yes.
[2:10] >> I do.
[2:11] I do.
[2:12] Um
[2:14] you know, I I feel like women can have a
[2:16] laundry list of preferences, but as soon
[2:19] as we say one or two, it's like, you
[2:21] know what I'm saying? We we in the dirt.
[2:23] >> You crucified.
[2:24] >> But uh
[2:25] but I will say, women with kids, they
[2:27] soft, BRO.
[2:28] >> THEY ARE. I agree.
[2:30] I agree.
[2:30] >> They a little softer.
[2:32] >> I agree.
[2:32] >> They A.
[2:35] Reconsider, bro.
[2:39] You might miss out on your blessing.
[2:41] >> Hey, I got a brother right now. I got a
[2:43] 4-year-old niece, and I got a 2-year-old
[2:46] I got a 3-year-old nephew. My brother
[2:48] right now, he just told me, "Bro, if I
[2:50] could do it again, I'd be with you right
[2:51] now. I wouldn't do it."
[2:53] He He'd do it over again if he HAD A
[2:55] CHANCE TO. THE FIRST TIME. The first
[2:57] time.
[2:57] >> So, let me
[2:58] >> You all want TO GET IT RIGHT THE FIRST
[2:59] TIME.
[3:00] >> Let me Let me say this to you.
[3:02] Let me say this to you.
[3:04] Everybody cuz I know what they about to
[3:06] do to you.
[3:08] >> I do, too, man. I get it all the time.
[3:10] They ask a question. I already know.
[3:12] >> I'mma tell you this.
[3:17] >> I don't got no kids. Y'all don't care.
[3:18] >> Oh, listen. This ain't even about
[3:19] bashing you.
[3:20] >> Okay.
[3:22] >> This ain't saying that you not a real
[3:23] man. Hold on. No, no, hear me out.
[3:25] This ain't me saying you ain't a real
[3:27] man if and a a real man would. This is
[3:30] me saying shout out to the men
[3:34] that step up where other men stepped
[3:35] out.
[3:36] >> I'm with you.
[3:38] >> Shout out to the men that show seen the
[3:40] value in you as well as that life. Shout
[3:42] out to the men because without those
[3:44] men, where would I be?
[3:46] There are so many boys
[3:48] that needed that guidance and that
[3:49] direction, and there was a man that
[3:50] loved their mama so much they love them
[3:53] too.
[3:55] They showed up for them. Let me tell you
[3:56] this.
[3:59] I'm glad you disqualified yourself.
[4:02] Because single moms ain't for every man.
[4:05] You got to have a certain level of
[4:06] responsibility, character, and
[4:09] intention. Let me tell you something.
[4:10] Single moms scare off men without mother
[4:14] children.
[4:17] >> Mike, don't do that, Mike.
[4:19] You know I love my mama.
[4:22] Mike, don't do
[4:23] >> \[laughter\]
[4:23] >> I know.
[4:25] >> MIKE, WHAT'S UP?
[4:26] >> WHAT'S UP, MIKE?
[4:27] >> HEY, MAN. Take me to 63rd or some \[ __ \]
[4:31] Free dirt.
[4:33] Something.
[4:34] We over two on the real \[ __ \] question
[4:38] department.
[4:40] >> \[laughter\]
[4:41] >> As a man.
[4:43] Man to man.
[4:44] >> I got you.
[4:46] >> A lot of times
[4:48] you're going to internalize this
[4:49] rejection that you receive because you
[4:52] might not be capable of being what a
[4:55] woman with a child needs.
[4:58] >> I You're right.
[5:00] >> But instead of
[5:03] realize I mean
[5:06] Bro.
[5:07] >> \[laughter\]
[5:11] >> UM
[5:14] THE WEIGHT OF being a provider of a
[5:17] child
[5:18] is 10 times more of that than another
[5:21] functioning adult.
[5:23] And you don't have the authority to even
[5:26] play with that.
[5:28] What you do inside of your own crib on
[5:31] the west side, I'm assuming it's the
[5:32] west side.
[5:34] Um
[5:35] >> South side.
[5:36] South side.
[5:39] >> Oh, these are south side \[ __ \]
[5:42] These are south side \[ __ \]
[5:43] >> Englewood.
[5:44] >> Thank you for your question. Thank you.
[5:47] Hold on kitty.
[5:49] Hold on come back come back. Come back
[5:50] to the microphone room. You better come
[5:52] get this ass whoop \[ __ \]
[5:55] Hey you only got one eye you lucky.
[5:57] >> \[laughter\]
[5:57] >> Well I'mma talk to you with your one
[5:59] eye.
[6:00] Talk to me kitty.
[6:02] I like that.
[6:03] >> \[laughter\]
[6:04] >> Let me let me say this
[6:06] cuz I've been a single mother.
[6:08] We don't be worried about y'all.
[6:12] Let me let me say that first. Let me
[6:13] preface by saying that first. Y'all be
[6:15] summoning us.
[6:17] Cuz y'all be getting up in them comment
[6:18] sections
[6:20] and talking about us. When we be posting
[6:22] our kids and stuff or when we post a man
[6:24] who actually wants us y'all jump in the
[6:26] comment sections and call this man a
[6:27] simp and start antagonizing him. So then
[6:30] we don't have no choice but to start
[6:31] talking about it. Your preference is
[6:33] your preference. We don't care. Quite
[6:35] frankly you probably shouldn't be a step
[6:36] dad. You may not qualify for that. Thank
[6:38] you for disqualifying yourself like he
[6:40] said earlier. However it's not I promise
[6:43] you it don't be a issue. It be y'all
[6:45] having those conversations and bringing
[6:47] us into it that be a issue. We want men
[6:49] who want to be men who can take care of
[6:51] kids. We cool with that. But y'all be
[6:53] making these reels and red pilling and
[6:55] doing all that other stuff and
[6:56] kumbayaing with other miserable men and
[6:58] stuff and all that talking about stuff
[7:00] like that. Y'all be bringing us up.
[7:02] That's where the issue be. Go get your
[7:03] knock off. You know what I'm saying? Go
[7:05] ahead and do what it is that you want to
[7:06] do. If you want TO BE WITH A WOMAN WHO
[7:07] DON'T GOT KIDS THAT'S COOL. We ain't
[7:09] even tripping about you. It be those men
[7:11] that be tripping about you. It be them
[7:13] other guys that be tripping. So talk TO
[7:14] THEM MEN. I PROMISE YOU THE WOMEN AIN'T
[7:16] TRIPPING about y'all. We be We be being
[7:18] loved by these men.
[7:19] >> I kid you not. We get We get destroyed.
[7:22] I'M TELLING YOU I GET CRITICISM ALL THE
[7:24] TIME FROM
[7:26] >> MAN STOP IT.
[7:27] >> YOU GET REJECTION \[ __ \] CRITICISM and
[7:30] rejection are two TOTALLY DIFFERENT
[7:32] THINGS.
[7:35] >> I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR ARMS.
[7:36] I AIN'T EVEN GOING TO SPEAK on that. But
[7:38] let me say this real quick. YOU REMIND
[7:39] ME OF MY BIRTHDAY.
[7:41] I I CAN'T TELL YOU ONE OF THOSE GUYS
[7:44] when you under the influence you be
[7:45] running at your mouth. I CAN TELL you
[7:48] one of those people. I know you are. I I
[7:50] can tell BY THE WAY HE TALK. I CAN TELL
[7:52] BY THE WAY HE CAME up to that microphone
[7:54] that he'd be the main guy the main
[7:56] CORPORATE TOPIC. YOU DON'T NEED TO BE
[7:58] WITH A WOMAN WHO GOT KIDS. YADA YADA
[7:59] YADA. AND THEN YOU GET MAD WHEN THEY
[8:01] COME AT YOU LIKE STOP THE CAP, MAN. I
[8:04] just be saying THEY NOT MY PREFERENCE.
[8:06] THAT'S ALL I GOT TO
[8:07] >> HOLD ON. ARE YOU
[8:08] ARE YOU WHAT?
[8:09] >> HOLD ON. BUT LET ME TELL YOU THIS
[8:10] THOUGH. I GUARANTEE YOU THOUGH I DON'T
[8:12] BE ALL over line. Shout out to my
[8:14] husband. But even before my husband you
[8:16] didn't catch me online talking about
[8:17] what my preference was. It's my
[8:18] preference. Why I got to explain it to
[8:20] the world? Why I got to explain it to
[8:21] anybody else?
[8:22] >> Well, cuz his preference don't want him.
[8:28] Because if if if your preference wanted
[8:30] you, YOU WOULDN'T EVEN CARE ABOUT WHAT
[8:33] YOUR NON-PREFERENCE WANTED.
[8:35] LIKE IT'S JUST A QUESTION JUST A
[8:37] QUESTION.
[8:37] >> I'LL BE I'LL BE SAYING NO NO I GET IT.
[8:39] >> JUST A QUESTION. YOU THINK ABOUT it now.
[8:41] You go ahead and sit back down. You
[8:42] think about this \[ __ \]
[8:45] >> \[cheering\]

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