# Are We Ever Happy With Our Bodies?

An episode of [Best Life Pending with Steph De Sousa & Chrissy Hearn](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/6806116018), 4 Oct 2026, 28 min.

Audio: https://p.podderapp.com/2544644999/traffic.omny.fm/d/clips/2fb3740d-3436-44af-8cc0-a91900716aa5/8a91b3ea-7269-45c7-af4a-b4b4000720d1/e201c55f-6e27-49e3-8fab-b4d500476475/audio.mp3?utm_source=Podcast&in_playlist=e767cf02-fafa-4c28-b85a-b4b400072512

Chrissy and Steph get candid about body image, weight, ageing, cosmetic procedures, and the way we speak to ourselves. Plus, they unpack why accepting a compliment or even a little help can sometimes be harder than giving it See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

## Transcript

[0:05] Speaker 1: A Poche production. And action. I'm Chrissy Hearn.
[0:14] Speaker 2: And I am Steph DeSouza. And our podcast is Best
[0:18] Speaker 2: Life Fending. Do you want to be my wingwoman?
[0:23] Speaker 1: Be nice to yourself.
[0:24] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[0:25] Speaker 1: Don't be so hard on yourself. Yeah.
[0:27] Speaker 2: And go.
[0:27] Speaker 1: And go. And go. What's your thoughts, feelings, and emotions?
[0:31] Speaker 2: Oh, you don't say that enough anymore.
[0:33] Speaker 1: I don't.
[0:33] Speaker 2: Thoughts, feelings, emotions. You need to get back to that.
[0:35] Speaker 2: I used to love that with you. Changing body. I'm
[0:38] Speaker 2: in a good place with my body now.
[0:40] Speaker 1: Great.
[0:40] Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's only fairly recent.
[0:43] Speaker 1: Oh, so that's never always been the case?
[0:45] Speaker 2: Oh, my God, no. Oh, really? Yeah, no. I was
[0:49] Speaker 2: always being the fat person in my life. I'm the
[0:52] Speaker 2: fatty boomba. Can you not say that? I know, but
[0:56] Speaker 2: that's just always been my attitude towards myself. It's funny,
[0:59] Speaker 2: my sister, Therese, who's passed away, we always used to
[1:01] Speaker 2: say we were born fat. And like, honestly, what even
[1:04] Speaker 2: is fat? I wish I was fat as I was
[1:06] Speaker 2: when I thought I was my fattest. That's what I
[1:08] Speaker 2: wish now.
[1:08] Speaker 1: Oh, wow.
[1:09] Speaker 2: Because I was not.
[1:10] Speaker 1: I was not. Isn't it crazy what our brain lies
[1:13] Speaker 1: to us about?
[1:14] Speaker 2: No, it's ridiculous. But no, I'm just at the point
[1:17] Speaker 2: in my life where I just go, you know what,
[1:19] Speaker 2: this is who I am. I mean, would I like
[1:21] Speaker 2: to be like a size 12 and perfectly in proportion
[1:27] Speaker 2: and no rolls and nothing? Of course I would. But
[1:30] Speaker 2: I think I've just accepted this is who I am
[1:33] Speaker 2: and I am absolutely fine with that. I can wear
[1:36] Speaker 2: the clothes that I want to wear. I can be
[1:38] Speaker 2: comfortable in my own skin. I just think at 53,
[1:41] Speaker 2: maybe 54, don't know. It's just time that I just went,
[1:45] Speaker 2: you know what, this is who I am and I'll
[1:47] Speaker 2: worry about it anymore.
[1:48] Speaker 1: Was it consuming, though, for you growing up?
[1:51] Speaker 2: Oh, it was consuming.
[1:52] Speaker 1: You said footy bumba.
[1:54] Speaker 2: Fatty bumba, yeah.
[1:55] Speaker 1: Did it consume you? Yeah, 100%.
[1:58] Speaker 2: I always felt fat growing up, always.
[2:00] Speaker 1: And were you picked on at school, bullied, people say anything?
[2:05] Speaker 2: No, it was all in my own head.
[2:07] Speaker 1: Is that right?
[2:07] Speaker 2: Yep, 100% in my own head. Don't know where it
[2:09] Speaker 2: came from. Probably just, you know, the diet culture of
[2:12] Speaker 2: the time.
[2:14] Speaker 1: Did your mum and older sisters have good body images
[2:16] Speaker 1: about themselves?
[2:18] Speaker 2: No, I don't think so. I don't think any of
[2:20] Speaker 2: us ever did. I don't know. Again, I think it
[2:23] Speaker 2: was just the culture and the time. We're not a
[2:26] Speaker 2: skinny family. So maybe it was just that social pressure. Maybe.
[2:30] Speaker 2: I don't know. Yeah, I look back at photos now.
[2:34] Speaker 2: There's not many times throughout my life when I look
[2:37] Speaker 2: and go, oh, you're a beast there. I mean, there
[2:39] Speaker 2: have been times like when I've In the midst of
[2:41] Speaker 2: my baby producing era, very overweight.
[2:44] Speaker 1: See, I don't have any photos of me with the boysies.
[2:49] Speaker 2: Because?
[2:49] Speaker 1: Because I could never take a photo because I was
[2:52] Speaker 1: just so obese in my eyes, in my brain. I
[2:56] Speaker 1: wouldn't even go swimming when my boys were little because
[2:59] Speaker 1: I was just so overweight. And then with Barley, with
[3:04] Speaker 1: Christian Hull and our last podcast that we did, we
[3:06] Speaker 1: did it in Barley.
[3:07] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[3:08] Speaker 1: There was me coming out of the water. I don't
[3:10] Speaker 1: know if you saw that footage in my swimmers.
[3:13] Speaker 2: Was it the one in the ocean?
[3:14] Speaker 1: Yeah, in the ocean.
[3:15] Speaker 2: Yeah, where you fell over.
[3:16] Speaker 1: I couldn't get up. It was funny as, and it's hilarious,
[3:19] Speaker 1: but I looked at that and I was just absolutely mortified. Oh, really?
[3:25] Speaker 1: Absolutely mortified. I looked at it and there were so
[3:28] Speaker 1: many people saying, good on you. There were no trolling.
[3:31] Speaker 1: No one trolled at all. And then I thought to myself, listen,
[3:36] Speaker 1: you need to do something.
[3:37] Speaker 2: Oh, really?
[3:38] Speaker 1: Because you're not doing the best thing by you. You're
[3:40] Speaker 1: not the healthiest you.
[3:41] Speaker 2: Oh, really?
[3:42] Speaker 1: So that's when I came home and got on the
[3:44] Speaker 1: Jabba Jabba's. Oh, interesting. I hate, and I hate saying hate,
[3:49] Speaker 1: I dislike intensely talking about weight.
[3:52] Speaker 2: So this is uncomfortable for you today. Oh, absolutely.
[3:54] Speaker 1: I've had an eating disorder as a young person growing up.
[3:58] Speaker 2: Can I ask which?
[3:59] Speaker 1: Oh, I was bulimic. So I would eat and then
[4:01] Speaker 1: I'd go and vomit it all up and get rid
[4:03] Speaker 1: of it. And to me, I don't have a good
[4:06] Speaker 1: relationship with food.
[4:08] Speaker 2: I would say I've had disordered eating my whole life.
[4:11] Speaker 2: I wouldn't say I had an eating disorder, but disordered eating.
[4:13] Speaker 1: Yeah. And binged. I would binge eat and, you know,
[4:17] Speaker 1: stuff like that and get it out. But it to
[4:19] Speaker 1: me is... so important that we talk about it more
[4:23] Speaker 1: because people suffer in silence.
[4:25] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[4:26] Speaker 1: We have women that are in their 50s still to
[4:28] Speaker 1: this day doing exactly what I did when I was 16.
[4:31] Speaker 2: Yeah, I haven't.
[4:33] Speaker 1: Terrible times.
[4:34] Speaker 2: And yet why the whole Jabba Jab, Mongero, that's not
[4:38] Speaker 2: approved by the PBS, it's so expensive that it's, what's
[4:42] Speaker 2: the word, prohibitive for the majority of the population.
[4:46] Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
[4:47] Speaker 2: So there's not many people that can afford it, really.
[4:49] Speaker 1: Food noise, being a healthy range in weight, diabetes, heart disease, osteoporosis.
[4:57] Speaker 2: Knee replacements, hip replacements, all that kind of stuff as
[4:59] Speaker 2: a result of being overweight and the overuse and all
[5:02] Speaker 2: those kinds of things. Surely that would save the government
[5:06] Speaker 2: so much money in healthcare. You know, when Ozempic came out,
[5:09] Speaker 2: what really annoyed me was they wouldn't let people use
[5:13] Speaker 2: it for weight loss and they still won't. You have
[5:15] Speaker 2: to have diabetes. So you actually have to have the
[5:17] Speaker 2: problem from being overweight in order to access Ozempic, which
[5:22] Speaker 2: is the more affordable version of this drug. It's flipped
[5:26] Speaker 2: on its head. Why are we not doing preventative medicine?
[5:29] Speaker 1: When you look in the mirror, what do you actually see?
[5:31] Speaker 2: I like what I see now.
[5:33] Speaker 1: Fantastic.
[5:34] Speaker 2: Yeah, I do. You know, I think that's come as
[5:37] Speaker 2: a result of what I do for a living and
[5:40] Speaker 2: being on social media. I think that has helped me
[5:44] Speaker 2: accept who I am. I think I've said in another
[5:46] Speaker 2: episode that when I started being me and cooking the
[5:50] Speaker 2: authentic food that I cook at home for my family,
[5:54] Speaker 2: that's when my social media took off. I've found that
[5:56] Speaker 2: people love it when I cook in my pajamas. They
[5:59] Speaker 2: like it when I've got bed hair. They like it
[6:01] Speaker 2: when I've got no makeup on. They like it when
[6:03] Speaker 2: I'm relatable. And I think that has led to me
[6:08] Speaker 2: accepting that what I am is totally fine. That is
[6:14] Speaker 2: why I think I'm in a good place where I
[6:16] Speaker 2: am now.
[6:17] Speaker 1: I am only starting. My brain lies to me and
[6:21] Speaker 1: tells me I'm actually a lot bigger than what I
[6:23] Speaker 1: really am.
[6:24] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[6:25] Speaker 1: And so when I go clothes shopping and I'm trying
[6:27] Speaker 1: on clothes, because my brain lies to me, I'm finding
[6:32] Speaker 1: that I'm trying on clothes that are a lot bigger
[6:35] Speaker 1: because my brain's telling me I'm a lot bigger. Yeah.
[6:38] Speaker 1: But I'm starting to pull that back a bit.
[6:41] Speaker 2: Yeah. I guess that's just something that you learn with
[6:43] Speaker 2: time too, right? You said you had an eating disorder.
[6:47] Speaker 2: What stopped that?
[6:48] Speaker 1: I don't know what stopped it. I don't remember that
[6:50] Speaker 1: time a lot. You never got therapy or anything like that? Oh, no. God, no.
[6:53] Speaker 2: When you look in the mirror, what do you see
[6:55] Speaker 2: or say to yourself?
[6:57] Speaker 1: Oh, I'm terrible. I am. Oh, I'm shocking. I am
[7:00] Speaker 1: so mean to myself. It's habits of a lifetime. Like
[7:03] Speaker 1: if you've always done it and you've always got that
[7:06] Speaker 1: bad body image. It's very hard to come out the
[7:09] Speaker 1: other side and be positive. I'm very body positivity for
[7:15] Speaker 1: other people.
[7:16] Speaker 2: But just not for you.
[7:17] Speaker 1: I'm just not for me.
[7:18] Speaker 2: Yeah, it's interesting, isn't it?
[7:19] Speaker 1: So I've had to get my mindset away from the
[7:22] Speaker 1: word exercise because that means punishment. It means all that.
[7:28] Speaker 1: So it's movement. Then I've come into healthy weight range
[7:33] Speaker 1: and that's what I'm working with.
[7:35] Speaker 2: To do that now. You're not trying to get skinny.
[7:37] Speaker 1: Not trying to get skinny. Not trying to fit into
[7:40] Speaker 1: a size 10. I'm just getting to a good, healthy
[7:43] Speaker 1: weight range.
[7:44] Speaker 2: Yeah, that you can maintain.
[7:45] Speaker 1: And if I want to have something to eat... be
[7:49] Speaker 1: it whatever I choose, I'm not going to say, you
[7:53] Speaker 1: can't have that. If I would like it, I can
[7:58] Speaker 1: have it. It's not me punishing myself and beating myself
[8:02] Speaker 1: up because I want to try and have something. Do
[8:05] Speaker 1: you get where I'm going with that?
[8:07] Speaker 2: Yeah, I do. You allow yourself to have a bit
[8:10] Speaker 2: of freedom.
[8:10] Speaker 1: Definitely.
[8:12] Speaker 2: Is that the Jabba Jab that's doing that? Do you think?
[8:14] Speaker 1: I like the Jabba Jabba lot.
[8:15] Speaker 2: Yeah, because the food noise is gone.
[8:17] Speaker 1: The food noise is completely gone. Yeah.
[8:20] Speaker 2: I still have the food noise. I don't have it
[8:21] Speaker 2: as bad as I used to have it. It's not
[8:23] Speaker 2: as bad now.
[8:24] Speaker 1: I would be constantly thinking about food.
[8:27] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[8:27] Speaker 1: What could I eat? Can't eat that because that will
[8:30] Speaker 1: bring on this. I can't do that. That's too high
[8:33] Speaker 1: in fat. Yeah. I mean, isn't that ridiculous? Yeah, but
[8:36] Speaker 1: it was. 56 and it's like, come on.
[8:38] Speaker 2: But that was the era we grew up in though, right?
[8:39] Speaker 1: Oh, absolutely.
[8:40] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[8:41] Speaker 1: Yeah.
[8:41] Speaker 2: I think it's just such a hangover.
[8:43] Speaker 1: And also too, being brought up that I had to
[8:45] Speaker 1: clear my plate. Couldn't get up from the table until my.
[8:49] Speaker 2: Until you did.
[8:50] Speaker 1: So then you're actually programming your brain already to overeat. Yeah.
[8:55] Speaker 1: Because you could be stopping because you don't particularly need
[8:58] Speaker 1: any more... Yeah. Food. Yeah. But because you've got to
[9:02] Speaker 1: clear that plate.
[9:02] Speaker 2: Yeah. You've got to do it.
[9:03] Speaker 1: You've got to do it.
[9:05] Speaker 2: It's awful the kind of damage that we've done to ourselves. Oh, absolutely.
[9:09] Speaker 1: So have you done like with your girls? I mean,
[9:12] Speaker 1: there's more obviously food issues with girls. Yeah. How have
[9:17] Speaker 1: you raised them to be with food?
[9:19] Speaker 2: Not consciously. I don't think I did a great job,
[9:21] Speaker 2: to be honest, with my kids and food because I
[9:23] Speaker 2: think I was in the guts of my diet era
[9:29] Speaker 2: with all of my kids and i think i've said
[9:31] Speaker 2: before i can see what my food focus was with
[9:36] Speaker 2: each of my kids i can see where i was
[9:38] Speaker 2: at with food and what i was focused on with
[9:41] Speaker 2: each of them and looking at their attitude towards food
[9:44] Speaker 2: and the food that they like to eat and don't
[9:46] Speaker 2: like to eat it's a direct reflection on me see
[9:49] Speaker 2: i don't think i've done a great job to be
[9:51] Speaker 2: honest if i could do it again i would be
[9:52] Speaker 2: very different what would you do differently think i would
[9:56] Speaker 2: not be as mean to myself and i wouldn't do
[10:02] Speaker 2: all the diet stuff that i did i certainly wouldn't
[10:05] Speaker 2: talk about it in front of them i wouldn't say
[10:08] Speaker 2: things to myself like when i was trying things i
[10:10] Speaker 2: would say oh no i'm not gonna wear that it
[10:11] Speaker 2: makes me look fat or no i need to wear
[10:13] Speaker 2: suck me in undies with that you know my stomach do.
[10:15] Speaker 1: You see the word fat as a bad.
[10:18] Speaker 2: Word yeah 100 yeah absolutely Because for me, that was
[10:24] Speaker 2: what I was and therefore I was negative. My body
[10:28] Speaker 2: image was negative. So I see it as a negative thing.
[10:31] Speaker 2: Is it?
[10:32] Speaker 1: It's interesting you should say that because I was speaking
[10:35] Speaker 1: to a friend. She said, oh, look at my fat body.
[10:38] Speaker 1: And I said, don't call yourself fat. And she said,
[10:42] Speaker 1: fat isn't a bad word. Interesting.
[10:45] Speaker 2: Interesting.
[10:47] Speaker 1: For me?
[10:47] Speaker 2: Yeah, for me it is, yeah.
[10:49] Speaker 1: For me? Yeah.
[10:50] Speaker 2: But when you look at little babies and they've got
[10:52] Speaker 2: like these chubby little cheeks.
[10:53] Speaker 1: Oh, my God.
[10:54] Speaker 2: You just want to suck the flesh right off them.
[10:56] Speaker 1: Oh, they're just gorgeous.
[10:56] Speaker 2: Like I love their fat.
[10:57] Speaker 1: I love.
[10:59] Speaker 2: So what happened? When does that change? When do you
[11:01] Speaker 2: go from being gorgeous, chubby little things? To it being
[11:04] Speaker 2: a bad thing.
[11:05] Speaker 1: When does that change? And so right now, because we're
[11:07] Speaker 1: pre-recording this stuff, there's a very famous singer, an American singer,
[11:12] Speaker 1: a beautiful young lady who has shown definite signs of
[11:18] Speaker 1: something going on. Yeah.
[11:19] Speaker 2: Ariana Grande.
[11:20] Speaker 1: Yep. Great artist.
[11:21] Speaker 2: Amazing artist. Amazing. But she's scarily thin.
[11:24] Speaker 1: She is scarily thin.
[11:25] Speaker 2: There's a lot of people talking about it right now.
[11:28] Speaker 2: A lot of people weighing in on it. It's hard
[11:30] Speaker 2: to know what to do. Like, do you talk about it?
[11:32] Speaker 2: Do you not talk about it? But whether it's through
[11:34] Speaker 2: health or whatever, I don't.
[11:37] Speaker 1: See, I think it's a bad thing that we talk
[11:39] Speaker 1: about it. And I know it's great that we should
[11:41] Speaker 1: be bringing it out there and bringing it out to
[11:43] Speaker 1: the open. There's things that you don't talk about to
[11:46] Speaker 1: somebody that is a stranger.
[11:47] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[11:48] Speaker 1: You don't say to somebody that's a stranger, are you
[11:50] Speaker 1: ADHD undiagnosed?
[11:52] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[11:53] Speaker 1: Do you have a diagnosis?
[11:54] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[11:55] Speaker 1: It's like asking fertility-wise, are you having children? Yeah.
[11:58] Speaker 2: Have you got anorexia? Are you a blooming? Why would
[12:02] Speaker 2: you do that to a stranger? You would never do
[12:03] Speaker 2: that to a stranger, would you?
[12:04] Speaker 1: You don't ask questions like that.
[12:06] Speaker 2: No, it's very true.
[12:08] Speaker 1: And this is a very vulnerable woman, obviously going through
[12:11] Speaker 1: stuff right now.
[12:12] Speaker 2: But is it or is it just her? I mean,
[12:15] Speaker 2: some people are just very thin.
[12:18] Speaker 1: I think if you look at her earlier stuff, her
[12:21] Speaker 1: Nickelodeon stuff, then her career, this would be quite extreme.
[12:27] Speaker 2: Have you listened to her social media response?
[12:31] Speaker 1: Oh, what did she say?
[12:32] Speaker 2: She said, What you see as my healthy weight was
[12:36] Speaker 2: actually the most unhealthy I've ever been in my life.
[12:39] Speaker 1: See, isn't that incredible?
[12:39] Speaker 2: Saying I was drinking, I was not eating properly, I
[12:43] Speaker 2: wasn't exercising. Because I was the most unhealthy I've ever been.
[12:47] Speaker 2: And she's saying I actually feel healthier now, which is
[12:50] Speaker 2: really interesting. It's a different way of looking at it, right? Yes,
[12:53] Speaker 2: she's thin. Is that a disordered thinking as a result
[12:57] Speaker 2: of disordered eating?
[12:58] Speaker 1: I don't know.
[12:59] Speaker 2: But it's none of our business.
[13:00] Speaker 1: It's none of our business. Yeah. But I do see
[13:03] Speaker 1: a trend now of models and of women and around
[13:07] Speaker 1: that age group where they're extremely thin.
[13:10] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[13:11] Speaker 1: Like we did that back in the late 90s. Yeah,
[13:13] Speaker 1: we did. And we did that whole, you know.
[13:16] Speaker 2: And it wasn't great.
[13:17] Speaker 1: It wasn't great.
[13:18] Speaker 2: No.
[13:18] Speaker 1: And I worry that we're going back into that rather
[13:21] Speaker 1: than focusing on the healthy.
[13:22] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[13:23] Speaker 1: We're focusing on the pencil thin.
[13:25] Speaker 2: Yeah. And when I saw you when you came back
[13:28] Speaker 2: from your European summer vacation. Yes. And I hadn't seen
[13:31] Speaker 2: you for a little while. I said to you, oh
[13:33] Speaker 2: my God, Chrissy, you look amazing. How much weight have
[13:36] Speaker 2: you lost? And then I went to you, oh, actually,
[13:38] Speaker 2: I don't think I'm supposed to say that.
[13:40] Speaker 1: Excuse me. You can say anything to me.
[13:42] Speaker 2: I know I can say to you, but I don't
[13:44] Speaker 2: think I'm supposed to comment on your weight and your body.
[13:47] Speaker 2: I think I can say you look fabulous. But then
[13:49] Speaker 2: it's the same thing because you know you've lost weight
[13:52] Speaker 2: and you know that's why you're looking fabulous and you're
[13:54] Speaker 2: feeling fabulous is because of it.
[13:56] Speaker 1: I think if it was a stranger saying to me,
[14:01] Speaker 1: you look fabulous, you've lost so much weight.
[14:04] Speaker 2: Would you find that offensive?
[14:05] Speaker 1: I wouldn't find it offensive. But I would say that
[14:08] Speaker 1: would be the end of discussion. I don't like discussing weight.
[14:12] Speaker 1: It's a very personal thing. People are obese because of medications.
[14:16] Speaker 2: Oh, absolutely.
[14:17] Speaker 1: People are taking steroids.
[14:19] Speaker 2: Because of bloody menopause.
[14:19] Speaker 1: You know, the whole thing.
[14:21] Speaker 2: Exactly.
[14:21] Speaker 1: There are medical reasons why people are sometimes with lymphedema.
[14:26] Speaker 1: You know, the fluid that looks like you're overweight. Well,
[14:29] Speaker 1: potentially you're not because it's all full of fluid. Yeah.
[14:32] Speaker 1: I just don't like it when we enter into discussion
[14:35] Speaker 1: with people that are strangers.
[14:38] Speaker 2: 100% is none of our business. But then what about
[14:41] Speaker 2: people that put themselves out there as a personality like Ariana?
[14:48] Speaker 2: It's hard to miss. So are we okay to talk
[14:50] Speaker 2: about it then?
[14:51] Speaker 1: Well, you could then say she is in the public eye. Yeah.
[14:55] Speaker 1: She is out there. Yeah.
[14:56] Speaker 2: But then that's what creates these conversations though, isn't it?
[15:00] Speaker 2: Perhaps we shouldn't even be talking about that.
[15:02] Speaker 1: Potentially.
[15:03] Speaker 2: I don't know. There's so many rules.
[15:04] Speaker 1: There's so many rules. And it changes all the time.
[15:07] Speaker 1: I know.
[15:07] Speaker 2: And I think that's something that I struggle with as
[15:10] Speaker 2: a 53, maybe 54-year-old woman.
[15:12] Speaker 1: I love that.
[15:12] Speaker 2: Yes.
[15:14] Speaker 1: Between the two.
[15:15] Speaker 2: Between the two because I can't remember.
[15:17] Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that.
[15:17] Speaker 2: Is what am I allowed and what am I not
[15:19] Speaker 2: allowed to say and do? Because I sometimes get it wrong.
[15:23] Speaker 2: I try and keep across the changing things and terminologies
[15:28] Speaker 2: of all different things. I'm sure I get it wrong.
[15:31] Speaker 2: Sometimes I don't say anything to anybody because I'm scared
[15:34] Speaker 2: I'm going to get it wrong. And I feel like
[15:36] Speaker 2: that's not the answer either, right?
[15:39] Speaker 1: I am very conscious of word choices. Yeah. Yeah. And
[15:45] Speaker 1: I will absolutely in my brain edit myself before I
[15:49] Speaker 1: even say it out loud. Yeah. And I think to myself,
[15:52] Speaker 1: that's not being true to me though. No. Because I'm
[15:55] Speaker 1: having to edit. I would never say anything derogatory.
[15:59] Speaker 2: No.
[16:00] Speaker 1: Racist.
[16:00] Speaker 2: Or never been to.
[16:02] Speaker 1: Never will.
[16:03] Speaker 2: No.
[16:03] Speaker 1: Right. But then what could be a quite an innocent
[16:08] Speaker 1: comment could be then misconstrued.
[16:11] Speaker 2: And you're I think people of our generation and older
[16:16] Speaker 2: are criticised a lot for saying the wrong thing, but
[16:20] Speaker 2: we don't even know that we're saying the wrong thing.
[16:21] Speaker 1: No. It's just about education and being kind.
[16:24] Speaker 2: Yeah, I think so too.
[16:26] Speaker 1: We just are not kind anymore to each other. Or
[16:29] Speaker 1: to ourselves.
[16:30] Speaker 2: Or to ourselves.
[16:32] Speaker 1: Or to ourselves. To me, it's all about just being
[16:35] Speaker 1: a little bit gentle. Yeah. Just being a bit.
[16:37] Speaker 2: On yourself and to other people.
[16:38] Speaker 1: And to others. Everyone's... going through the same shit. We
[16:41] Speaker 1: just need to be a bit gentle and a bit kinder.
[16:44] Speaker 2: Yeah, we do. We definitely do.
[16:45] Speaker 1: Now, don't judge me, right?
[16:48] Speaker 2: Judgment frees iron, Chrissy.
[16:49] Speaker 1: I do like a filler.
[16:51] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[16:51] Speaker 1: I found that when I got a little bit older.
[16:53] Speaker 2: What do you have filled?
[16:54] Speaker 1: I have my lips filled.
[16:55] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[16:55] Speaker 1: I have the top of my lip up here.
[16:57] Speaker 2: Oh, do you?
[16:58] Speaker 1: Filled because it pushes everything up, doesn't fall back.
[17:01] Speaker 2: Okay.
[17:01] Speaker 1: Because you lose your.
[17:03] Speaker 2: Fullness?
[17:04] Speaker 1: Yes, thank you. You lose that fullness.
[17:06] Speaker 2: Okay.
[17:07] Speaker 1: So I get all of that done. Okay. And I
[17:10] Speaker 1: really have noticed that my eyelids, there's so much skin
[17:15] Speaker 1: that I just would like a little bit taken off.
[17:19] Speaker 2: A little slicey slice.
[17:20] Speaker 1: And I found that now my jowl, is it jowl?
[17:23] Speaker 2: Whatever you call it. Jowl.
[17:25] Speaker 1: My neck is horrendous.
[17:27] Speaker 2: But I think that's probably because you've just lost some weight.
[17:29] Speaker 1: I know. But I really would love just a little
[17:32] Speaker 1: bit of it. Just a little bit. I mean, everybody's
[17:35] Speaker 1: doing it. Look at Kris Jenner. She looks absolutely amazing.
[17:39] Speaker 2: Doesn't she look fabulous?
[17:40] Speaker 1: What's the other one? O'Donnell. What's her name? Rosie? Rosie O'Donnell.
[17:44] Speaker 1: She's had work done recently.
[17:46] Speaker 2: She has too.
[17:47] Speaker 1: I think that I should have it covered by Medicare.
[17:50] Speaker 1: I need a little bit of it. But the popularity
[17:53] Speaker 1: of these tours that take you to Thailand.
[17:57] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[17:58] Speaker 1: Go on a tour.
[17:59] Speaker 2: Or Turkey and the men are getting their hair replaced
[18:02] Speaker 2: in Turkey.
[18:02] Speaker 1: Can I tell you the amount of men that was
[18:05] Speaker 1: on our flight on Sunday or Saturday night that had
[18:08] Speaker 1: just visited Turkey.
[18:10] Speaker 2: Oh, for hair replacement? Yes. Really?
[18:11] Speaker 1: You could see it.
[18:13] Speaker 2: Crazy, isn't it? I used to say I always wanted
[18:16] Speaker 2: to get a breast lift. Yes. And a tummy tuck.
[18:19] Speaker 1: Right. Done.
[18:21] Speaker 2: And I used to think I'd be a facelifty person.
[18:24] Speaker 2: I don't have any problems with it whatsoever. You do,
[18:27] Speaker 2: you do whatever you want to do with your body.
[18:29] Speaker 2: And I always thought that would be me. In fact,
[18:32] Speaker 2: I always said when I had enough money, I would
[18:34] Speaker 2: get my boobs done. Definitely always thought that. But as
[18:36] Speaker 2: I've gotten older, I actually don't think I'll do it anymore.
[18:40] Speaker 1: Really?
[18:41] Speaker 2: I don't think I'll get anything done. I'm actually embracing
[18:44] Speaker 2: getting older gracefully and accepting the little bits and bobs
[18:50] Speaker 2: that poke out and roll and cover things as just
[18:55] Speaker 2: who I am. And I even, I've never had Botox.
[18:58] Speaker 2: I've never had a filler.
[18:59] Speaker 1: Really? Yep.
[19:00] Speaker 2: Never had anything. For me, it's a slippery slope because
[19:02] Speaker 2: I think if I start, that'll be the end of me.
[19:04] Speaker 2: I'll be a pussycat in no time. And again, for me,
[19:09] Speaker 2: it's been since I've been on social media, I think
[19:11] Speaker 2: that I've learned to accept myself for who I am.
[19:14] Speaker 2: And I almost feel like if I started down that slope,
[19:18] Speaker 2: I think I would probably lose some followers.
[19:21] Speaker 1: Really?
[19:22] Speaker 2: Because I feel like people like me for who I
[19:24] Speaker 2: am and I feel like if I start doing those things,
[19:26] Speaker 2: then I'm adjusting who I am.
[19:29] Speaker 1: Don't you think it's just enhancing all the good things though?
[19:32] Speaker 2: Yeah, but I feel like I don't need enhancement. Oh,
[19:34] Speaker 2: that's all good.
[19:35] Speaker 1: I'm getting my passport out. I will definitely like to
[19:39] Speaker 1: go and get some stuff done.
[19:40] Speaker 2: This conversation has actually been really good for me because
[19:43] Speaker 2: I have come to the realisation that I'm actually in
[19:45] Speaker 2: a really good space.
[19:47] Speaker 1: See?
[19:47] Speaker 2: As far as my body is concerned. I didn't realise
[19:49] Speaker 2: that had happened.
[19:50] Speaker 1: Cheaper than a psych ward.
[19:51] Speaker 2: I know, right? I know, but I didn't kind of
[19:54] Speaker 2: realise that I had evolved to be this.
[19:58] Speaker 1: You taking the higher ground. Line me up. Get me there.
[20:02] Speaker 1: I want that done and my eyes done.
[20:04] Speaker 2: Oh, don't get me wrong. There's bits of my body
[20:05] Speaker 2: that I would prefer not to have. Like I've just
[20:09] Speaker 2: noticed this little necky bit in the last few days.
[20:11] Speaker 2: I didn't know that I had it. I've just noticed it.
[20:13] Speaker 2: And I don't like the way my lipstick bleeds because
[20:16] Speaker 2: I've got the wrinkles.
[20:18] Speaker 1: I was a cigarette smoker for a long time. Don't
[20:21] Speaker 1: tell anyone.
[20:21] Speaker 2: So, yeah, I've noticed that. And I would prefer not
[20:24] Speaker 2: to have it. But I just really actually just accept
[20:28] Speaker 2: that it's part of me and I'm okay with me.
[20:31] Speaker 1: You go, girl.
[20:32] Speaker 2: Yeah, and you go, girl. Like if you want to
[20:34] Speaker 2: get it done. Oh, absolutely. I'll be the first one
[20:36] Speaker 2: there lined.
[20:37] Speaker 1: Up going, show me.
[20:37] Speaker 2: I want to see it.
[20:38] Speaker 1: That's so exciting for you. I love it. Just that.
[20:40] Speaker 2: Yeah, I love it. And look, I might change, you know.
[20:43] Speaker 2: I'm 53, maybe 54. Like maybe in 10 years' time
[20:45] Speaker 2: I might be lining up too. Who knows?
[20:48] Speaker 1: But it's interesting too, I think about women that are
[20:51] Speaker 1: our age on TV and the pressure they must have
[20:56] Speaker 1: to be doing little nip and tucks, to be staying
[20:59] Speaker 1: on the TV.
[21:00] Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly. But TV is becoming less and less relevant
[21:04] Speaker 2: and people are enjoying social media more because they're actually
[21:10] Speaker 2: seeing real people. Authenticity is the new trendy thing to be,
[21:15] Speaker 2: to be authentic. And warts and all kind of things.
[21:19] Speaker 1: You know that actress, Brian Brown's wife? Oh, yeah. What
[21:22] Speaker 1: was her name? Rachel. Rachel.
[21:24] Speaker 2: Ward.
[21:25] Speaker 1: Ward. She appeared on socials without any makeup. Yes, she
[21:30] Speaker 1: got trolled hardcore, didn't she? She got hauled across the
[21:34] Speaker 1: polls to say, oh, when did you get old? And, like,
[21:37] Speaker 1: people were like, you need to go and get some
[21:39] Speaker 1: work done. I can't believe the way you've aged. It
[21:42] Speaker 1: just blew up and it was like, hello?
[21:45] Speaker 2: I've aged. That's exactly what it is. Yeah, I think
[21:48] Speaker 2: it was probably a shock because I think she was new.
[21:50] Speaker 2: Had she been on social media? She'd been out of
[21:52] Speaker 2: the limelight for a while and I think it was
[21:54] Speaker 2: probably a bit of a shock to people. But how
[21:56] Speaker 2: do people say that?
[21:58] Speaker 1: Oh, it's awful.
[21:58] Speaker 2: It's wild, isn't it? And the only thing I think
[22:01] Speaker 2: I would like to do is I'd like to get
[22:03] Speaker 2: my teeth straightened.
[22:03] Speaker 1: Oh, yes, I'd like that too.
[22:04] Speaker 2: I'd like to get my teeth straightened.
[22:06] Speaker 1: Yes, I'd like Invisalign on my bottoms.
[22:09] Speaker 2: Yeah, particularly on my bottoms. They're a bit crooked. My
[22:12] Speaker 2: teeth never used to be that crooked on the bottom,
[22:14] Speaker 2: but I think that's to do with getting older. I
[22:16] Speaker 2: think your jaw shrinks.
[22:18] Speaker 1: Oh.
[22:18] Speaker 2: Or something, like there's movement there. I think, don't quote me,
[22:22] Speaker 2: but yeah, I think it's to do with that.
[22:23] Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I'd get them. I'd get the braces on.
[22:25] Speaker 2: Yeah, I would too. I don't know that I'd want braces.
[22:27] Speaker 2: I think I'd want those like.
[22:28] Speaker 1: Invisalign.
[22:29] Speaker 2: Invisalign things. I don't want anyone to see them.
[22:32] Speaker 1: I wouldn't give a shit.
[22:33] Speaker 2: Oh, really? No, I wouldn't give a shit. Yeah, no,
[22:35] Speaker 2: I wouldn't like that. See, there you go. Something I
[22:38] Speaker 2: do care about. I'm not Miss Innocent after all. Too funny.
[22:43] Speaker 1: I do not do compliments.
[22:45] Speaker 2: You don't?
[22:46] Speaker 1: No.
[22:47] Speaker 2: Don't accept them or don't give them?
[22:48] Speaker 1: I give. I don't like receiving a compliment because I
[22:53] Speaker 1: just don't see the use of it for me.
[22:55] Speaker 2: What do you mean?
[22:56] Speaker 1: Well, people would give me compliments about doing my job. Well,
[23:00] Speaker 1: that's my job. That's what I have to do, what
[23:03] Speaker 1: I'm employed to do.
[23:04] Speaker 2: Yeah, but you don't have to do it well.
[23:06] Speaker 1: I did my job very well. I think it's all
[23:08] Speaker 1: about that whole Southworth type stuff.
[23:12] Speaker 2: Do you believe people when they give you a compliment?
[23:14] Speaker 1: I believe it's coming from a good place. I don't
[23:17] Speaker 1: necessarily always believe it.
[23:20] Speaker 2: So when I said to you, Chrissy, you look fantastic,
[23:23] Speaker 2: how did that make you feel?
[23:24] Speaker 1: I was thankful.
[23:25] Speaker 2: Did it make you feel awkward?
[23:27] Speaker 1: I don't think much of it.
[23:28] Speaker 2: Oh, really?
[23:29] Speaker 1: No, I thank you for it.
[23:30] Speaker 2: No, no, no. You don't have to protect my feelings.
[23:33] Speaker 2: I don't care.
[23:33] Speaker 1: We didn't protect your feelings. I think it's because I
[23:36] Speaker 1: just don't do a lot of that type of stuff.
[23:39] Speaker 1: Like I'm very humble. Like I don't like it all.
[23:42] Speaker 2: But what don't you like about it?
[23:44] Speaker 1: God, we'll need a bloody couch in a minute. Lay
[23:46] Speaker 1: down on the couch and get some therapy. I don't know.
[23:49] Speaker 1: I just don't like it. Why don't you think I
[23:52] Speaker 1: like it?
[23:52] Speaker 2: I don't know.
[23:53] Speaker 1: Let's ask the question.
[23:54] Speaker 2: I'm not in your head. How am I supposed to know?
[23:57] Speaker 1: I thank you. Like, oh, thank you. That's very nice
[23:59] Speaker 1: of you to say.
[24:00] Speaker 2: When I said to you, you look fantastic, what went
[24:04] Speaker 2: on in your head?
[24:05] Speaker 1: I think it was more about, oh, thank you very much.
[24:07] Speaker 1: That's lovely.
[24:08] Speaker 2: And that's it.
[24:08] Speaker 1: And that was it.
[24:09] Speaker 2: It's nothing deep then.
[24:11] Speaker 1: No.
[24:11] Speaker 2: You don't hate it.
[24:12] Speaker 1: No, I don't hate it. I don't enter into it.
[24:15] Speaker 2: But you do because you compliment people all the time.
[24:18] Speaker 1: Because that's what I do. I am that person.
[24:20] Speaker 2: So you do enter into it.
[24:22] Speaker 1: But not for me. I want to make sure that
[24:25] Speaker 1: you are feeling good about yourself or whoever I'm with
[24:28] Speaker 1: that they feel that they're appreciated and loved and liked.
[24:32] Speaker 2: So you don't want to feel appreciated and loved?
[24:36] Speaker 1: I don't necessarily need that.
[24:38] Speaker 2: But what makes you think I need that?
[24:40] Speaker 1: Because I'm the born mother. I'm the nurturer. I'm the
[24:44] Speaker 1: one that, you know.
[24:44] Speaker 2: People pleaser?
[24:45] Speaker 1: Yes.
[24:48] Speaker 2: I just find that really interesting. I know.
[24:50] Speaker 1: It's silly, isn't it?
[24:51] Speaker 2: No, it's not silly.
[24:52] Speaker 1: I've never really thought about it. So it's sounding like
[24:54] Speaker 1: I'm a bit, oh.
[24:56] Speaker 2: I feel like you don't think you actually are worthy
[24:59] Speaker 2: of that compliment.
[25:00] Speaker 1: Oh, gosh, I will need to lie down.
[25:03] Speaker 2: Maybe just from what you've talked about as far as
[25:05] Speaker 2: your body image is concerned. I'd say that's probably what
[25:08] Speaker 2: it is. I had, back to me now.
[25:13] Speaker 1: Thank you for taking that off me.
[25:15] Speaker 2: Do you remember when Tony Robbins was a big thing
[25:18] Speaker 2: and you could buy the CD sets of his thing? Anyway,
[25:22] Speaker 2: I did that. It was the thing to do back then, motivation.
[25:26] Speaker 2: All the rest of it was going to change my
[25:27] Speaker 2: life via Anthony Robbins, Tony Robbins, whatever it was.
[25:30] Speaker 1: How much did you spend on that?
[25:32] Speaker 2: Oh, way more than I could afford. Yeah, it was
[25:35] Speaker 2: a lot of money back then. It was probably $ 200
[25:37] Speaker 2: or $ 300, which was like, it's going to make me
[25:39] Speaker 2: a million, right? It's going to make me a million.
[25:42] Speaker 2: But I remember one thing that I still think about
[25:45] Speaker 2: that I learned in there is that if someone offers
[25:47] Speaker 2: to help you or someone gives you a compliment, you
[25:51] Speaker 2: are actually giving them a gift by accepting that. And
[25:55] Speaker 2: I had never thought about it before. It's been in
[25:57] Speaker 2: my mind ever since. When you are helping someone or
[26:01] Speaker 2: when you are complimenting someone, you are actually making yourself
[26:05] Speaker 2: feel good.
[26:07] Speaker 1: Oh, so you think by me complimenting other people, it's
[26:10] Speaker 1: actually the reverse.
[26:12] Speaker 2: It makes you feel good to do that. There's nothing
[26:14] Speaker 2: wrong with that, 100%, nothing wrong with that.
[26:16] Speaker 1: I think you could be on to something.
[26:17] Speaker 2: Yeah, I think so. I think it makes you feel
[26:19] Speaker 2: good to compliment people and that's good because that's a
[26:21] Speaker 2: nice thing to do. So I've had to learn to
[26:25] Speaker 2: accept help from people. So you know when people say, oh,
[26:29] Speaker 2: do you want a hand with that? I go, no, no, no. Oh, good.
[26:31] Speaker 1: No, I'm good, thanks.
[26:32] Speaker 2: Yes. No, I can do it myself.
[26:34] Speaker 1: Absolutely.
[26:35] Speaker 2: Hyper independent.
[26:36] Speaker 1: Independent woman.
[26:37] Speaker 2: Hyper independent. But I've learned that by me saying, oh,
[26:41] Speaker 2: thank you, that'd be great. Can you just do that
[26:43] Speaker 2: for me? I'm actually giving them a gift because them
[26:47] Speaker 2: helping me actually makes them feel good. It's a gift.
[26:50] Speaker 2: Look at you, the gift giver. I'm the gift giver.
[26:51] Speaker 1: All year round.
[26:53] Speaker 2: It's hard to, but when you reframe it, it helps
[26:55] Speaker 2: you accept it more, when you realise you're accepting a
[26:58] Speaker 2: gift from somebody.
[26:58] Speaker 1: Well, look, that's going to be my challenge. You've been
[27:00] Speaker 1: giving everybody challenges.
[27:02] Speaker 2: Yes.
[27:03] Speaker 1: Oh, that's this week's challenge? That's my little challenge for myself.
[27:05] Speaker 1: All right.
[27:06] Speaker 2: Well, let's give it to our peeps, shall we? Lovely.
[27:10] Speaker 2: Our wingwomen, your challenge for this week is? to accept
[27:14] Speaker 2: a compliment or help from someone.
[27:18] Speaker 1: Oh, my God, I want to hear how they go.
[27:19] Speaker 1: I know, I do too. I want to see if
[27:20] Speaker 1: they struggle as much as I'm going to.
[27:22] Speaker 2: Yeah, but I think take notice of the other person
[27:26] Speaker 2: and whether you think that that actually was a gift
[27:28] Speaker 2: to them, whether it did actually make them feel good.
[27:30] Speaker 2: Challenge accepted?
[27:31] Speaker 1: Oh, my God, I've just saved myself so much money
[27:34] Speaker 1: on the site. I know, right? On the site couch.
[27:36] Speaker 1: Well done.
[27:37] Speaker 2: All right, next episode, friendship in your life.
[27:41] Speaker 1: Oh, and this is so in my lane. It is
[27:44] Speaker 1: in your lane. I can't wait to talk about this.
[27:46] Speaker 2: Yeah, I think there's a lot to talk about.
[27:48] Speaker 1: A lot to unpack.
[27:50] Speaker 2: See you next week.
[27:51] Speaker 1: Can't wait to see you then.

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