# Who Are We… and How Did We Get Here?

An episode of [Best Life Pending with Steph De Sousa & Chrissy Hearn](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/6806116018), 6 Sep 2026, 22 min.

Audio: https://p.podderapp.com/2544644999/traffic.omny.fm/d/clips/2fb3740d-3436-44af-8cc0-a91900716aa5/8a91b3ea-7269-45c7-af4a-b4b4000720d1/ee827643-1394-4b2d-8ec9-b4b9003f09a3/audio.mp3?utm_source=Podcast&in_playlist=e767cf02-fafa-4c28-b85a-b4b400072512

We are officially wing women, and we want you to come along for the ride! In our very first episode, we talk about how an unexpected DM turned into a friendship, why life after 40 and 50 can feel like starting all over again, losing people you love, finding confidence, menopause, ADHD, changing careers and finally giving yourself permission to ask: what do I actually want from the rest of my life? See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

## Transcript

[0:06] Speaker 1: Production and action.
[0:13] Speaker 2: I'm chrissy hearn and i am steph de souza and
[0:16] Speaker 2: our podcast is best life fending do you want to
[0:21] Speaker 2: be my wing woman.
[0:23] Speaker 1: Being nice to yourself yeah you're so hard on yourself.
[0:26] Speaker 2: Yeah who are we and how did we get here.
[0:28] Speaker 1: Can we just take a memento please just to acknowledge
[0:32] Speaker 1: what we're doing here the new venture what we're doing
[0:35] Speaker 1: how we're doing it and let the peoples know the
[0:38] Speaker 1: wing women I love that can you believe it was
[0:41] Speaker 1: like almost is it Eight months ago since we first
[0:44] Speaker 1: met for the very first time in person at the
[0:46] Speaker 1: TikTok Awards?
[0:47] Speaker 2: Yeah, I think so. I believe I slid into your DMs.
[0:50] Speaker 1: You did.
[0:50] Speaker 2: I did slide into your DMs because you really wanted
[0:53] Speaker 2: to go to the TikTok Awards.
[0:54] Speaker 1: I did.
[0:55] Speaker 2: And TikTok were very rude and never invited you. They never,
[0:57] Speaker 2: ever asked me to go. And they gave me a
[1:01] Speaker 2: plus one.
[1:02] Speaker 1: See?
[1:03] Speaker 2: I wouldn't normally do something like this, but I just
[1:05] Speaker 2: sent you a message and said, do you want to
[1:07] Speaker 2: be my wingwoman? And that was where our wing woman started,
[1:12] Speaker 2: wasn't it? From that TikTok event. Absolutely.
[1:14] Speaker 1: Can I tell you where I was when that message
[1:16] Speaker 1: came through?
[1:16] Speaker 2: Where were you?
[1:17] Speaker 1: Christian and I were actually doing the podcast from the
[1:20] Speaker 1: zoo in Canberra. Oh, were you? And as that message
[1:22] Speaker 1: came through, a giraffe walked straight past the window. I thought...
[1:27] Speaker 1: Oh my God. It's a sign of some sort. It's
[1:29] Speaker 1: a sign, yeah.
[1:30] Speaker 2: Do you believe in signs?
[1:31] Speaker 1: Absolutely.
[1:32] Speaker 2: Yeah. I'm a big believer in number plates. I know
[1:34] Speaker 2: that sounds really stupid, but.
[1:36] Speaker 1: Talk me through the number plates.
[1:38] Speaker 2: I see signs in number plates.
[1:39] Speaker 1: What do you mean?
[1:40] Speaker 2: So I'll be thinking about something, and it's normally my
[1:44] Speaker 2: dad or my sister or my nephew have passed on. Yeah.
[1:46] Speaker 2: I'll be thinking about them or I'll be troubled by
[1:49] Speaker 2: something and I'll look up. And there'll be a number
[1:52] Speaker 2: plate that has their initials on it.
[1:54] Speaker 1: I see.
[1:55] Speaker 2: It's wild how often it happens. My sister and I
[1:58] Speaker 2: always talked about white feathers.
[2:00] Speaker 1: They're angels, aren't they? Don't they indicate angels?
[2:02] Speaker 2: She said I'd leave white feathers. And I do see feathers,
[2:05] Speaker 2: but like really they're just birds dropping their feathers. Like
[2:07] Speaker 2: I don't think she placed them there, but I think
[2:09] Speaker 2: she puts cars with number plates in front of me
[2:12] Speaker 2: as a sign.
[2:13] Speaker 1: I love it. I love a good sign. A good
[2:15] Speaker 1: sign for me is a kookaburra because that's my mum
[2:17] Speaker 1: and my brother. So when I ever see a kookaburra,
[2:20] Speaker 1: it just reminds me that they're with me.
[2:22] Speaker 2: My other sister, who isn't dead, she sees kookaburras. She
[2:26] Speaker 2: thinks my sister comes to her in a kookaburra because
[2:29] Speaker 2: wherever she goes, there's always a kookaburra. Even if it's
[2:31] Speaker 2: not real, it just makes you feel good, right?
[2:33] Speaker 1: Absolutely. And can you imagine that when you slid into
[2:36] Speaker 1: my DMs, the sign of the giraffe walking past and
[2:40] Speaker 1: now here we are?
[2:43] Speaker 2: So cool. So anyway, we went to back on track.
[2:46] Speaker 1: See, this is what, okay, let's just do a little
[2:48] Speaker 1: disclaimer for the peoples out there, for the wing women.
[2:51] Speaker 2: Diagnosed and undiagnosed.
[2:53] Speaker 1: Correct. I am now formally diagnosed ADHD and you are?
[2:59] Speaker 2: I believe I'm undiagnosed.
[3:00] Speaker 1: This is what this podcast is going to be about.
[3:03] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[3:03] Speaker 1: It's going to be about different conversations. It's coming in
[3:06] Speaker 1: and out. We are going to go from A to
[3:09] Speaker 1: Z in one episode.
[3:10] Speaker 2: In the space of two seconds. Yeah.
[3:12] Speaker 1: Like it's going to be all on. So buckle up, people,
[3:15] Speaker 1: because this is going to be great fun.
[3:16] Speaker 2: Raw honesty and probably all the things that you maybe
[3:20] Speaker 2: are talking about with your girlfriends or that you want
[3:22] Speaker 2: to talk about with your girlfriends but are maybe a
[3:24] Speaker 2: little bit scared to.
[3:25] Speaker 1: Or don't have a girlfriend. Yeah, or don't have one.
[3:27] Speaker 1: To actually bounce this off.
[3:29] Speaker 2: 100%.
[3:29] Speaker 1: And, you know, we want to be there to help
[3:30] Speaker 1: the masses. Yeah. We want to be wing girls to
[3:33] Speaker 1: our girls.
[3:33] Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah. And we need some more wing girls. Absolutely.
[3:37] Speaker 1: We're raising a nation of women over 40. We want
[3:40] Speaker 1: to be able to support them.
[3:41] Speaker 2: Yeah. So that's how we started. You were my wing
[3:43] Speaker 2: woman at the TikTok Awards. And we had such a
[3:45] Speaker 2: good time.
[3:46] Speaker 1: Oh, my God. That was so much fun. It was.
[3:48] Speaker 2: But everyone was really surprised that I actually booked a
[3:50] Speaker 2: hotel room for us to share that night when we
[3:53] Speaker 2: had actually never met. People found it really odd. Like, yeah. Like,
[3:56] Speaker 2: who went sharing a hotel room with you?
[3:58] Speaker 1: We're not in the same bed, babe.
[4:00] Speaker 2: She's not. Well, I wouldn't have cared if we were. Like, seriously. Like,
[4:04] Speaker 2: it really wouldn't have bothered me. But I knew you
[4:05] Speaker 2: weren't an axe murderer, so it was totally fine.
[4:08] Speaker 1: Oh, great. Okay. What were the indicators that I weren't?
[4:10] Speaker 2: That you weren't? Yeah. I don't know. It was just
[4:13] Speaker 2: a feeling.
[4:14] Speaker 1: Just the gut feeling.
[4:15] Speaker 2: Gut feeling. I went with my instincts, yeah. All right.
[4:19] Speaker 1: So who are you?
[4:20] Speaker 2: Stephanie Joy DeSosa, live at Tarrauba. I'm an author. I'm
[4:25] Speaker 2: a cook. I'm a chef. What else do I do? Fashionista. Fashionista.
[4:29] Speaker 1: Oh, my God.
[4:30] Speaker 2: Creator of Chaos. I own a website.
[4:33] Speaker 1: Mother of?
[4:34] Speaker 2: A mother of four. Grandma to 1.8.5 maybe. About to
[4:41] Speaker 2: have my second grandbaby.
[4:43] Speaker 1: Partner to?
[4:43] Speaker 2: Partner to Nev. What about you?
[4:45] Speaker 1: Who are you?
[4:45] Speaker 2: Who the hell are you?
[4:47] Speaker 1: Who the hell am I? Well, that's a really good question.
[4:50] Speaker 1: My name is Chrissy Hearn. I am 56 identifying as
[4:54] Speaker 1: 49 and that has always been my thing. That's something
[4:57] Speaker 1: I started with six years ago in the car when
[5:00] Speaker 1: I was losing my shit at home. COVID just started.
[5:04] Speaker 2: Oh, did you start then? Yep.
[5:05] Speaker 1: My mum was chronically sick at the stage and my
[5:08] Speaker 1: brother had cancer. The car was my... Yeah, it was.
[5:12] Speaker 1: The car was my little safety place. I would go
[5:14] Speaker 1: and sit there and I just fell in love with
[5:17] Speaker 1: just talking to the camera and Look at us now.
[5:20] Speaker 1: Here we are.
[5:20] Speaker 2: I know. Mother to?
[5:22] Speaker 1: Mother to three. Fur babies to two. I've got my
[5:25] Speaker 1: fur babies.
[5:26] Speaker 2: And wife to?
[5:27] Speaker 1: Yes, Ricardo.
[5:28] Speaker 2: Ricardo.
[5:28] Speaker 1: Ricardo.
[5:29] Speaker 2: The loved one. The loved one. Yeah.
[5:31] Speaker 1: Beautiful man.
[5:31] Speaker 2: I forgot to say I'm 54, I think. I get confused.
[5:36] Speaker 2: I think I've Well, it's irrelevant. I mean, 53 or 54,
[5:38] Speaker 2: I can't remember which one it is because it changes. Well,
[5:41] Speaker 2: it doesn't change.
[5:42] Speaker 1: Well, it does, babes. It changes every year.
[5:43] Speaker 2: It changes every year, but I get confused with which
[5:46] Speaker 2: year I'm at. So I think I'm 54, but I
[5:47] Speaker 2: could be 53.
[5:48] Speaker 1: Don't quote me.
[5:49] Speaker 2: And it's interesting.
[5:49] Speaker 1: We're not going to hold you to it.
[5:50] Speaker 2: No. You started your content when your brother had cancer
[5:55] Speaker 2: and your mother was chronically ill. Yeah. It's really interesting
[5:57] Speaker 2: because I started creating content when I was caring for
[6:00] Speaker 2: my sister who was terminally ill. It's really interesting how
[6:02] Speaker 2: that's a thing, isn't it? For me, it was... A
[6:05] Speaker 2: bit of escapism and something to do apart from focus
[6:09] Speaker 2: on that because we were in the weeds. Yeah.
[6:13] Speaker 1: It quietens your mind because you're not actually focusing on that.
[6:17] Speaker 1: You're focusing on something creative. It's very true. And I
[6:20] Speaker 1: think that undiagnosed and diagnosed creatives.
[6:23] Speaker 2: They're diagnosed and undiagnosed.
[6:25] Speaker 1: Yeah, that's right. Vice versa. I think that that's got
[6:28] Speaker 1: a lot to come into play. Yeah.
[6:30] Speaker 2: Yeah. I remember not long after my sister passed away,
[6:33] Speaker 2: it was about three months later, Nev said to me,
[6:36] Speaker 2: so what are you going to do? Because I'd quit
[6:40] Speaker 2: my job to go and stay with my sister. And
[6:44] Speaker 2: he said, so what are you going to do? He goes,
[6:46] Speaker 2: you can't just sit on the couch for the rest
[6:47] Speaker 2: of your life because that's what I was doing because
[6:49] Speaker 2: I was sad, really sad. And I just went, I'm
[6:54] Speaker 2: going to give this content thing a good crack.
[6:57] Speaker 1: He said, give me 12 months.
[6:59] Speaker 2: If it doesn't do anything in 12 months, then I
[7:02] Speaker 2: will get a J-O-B.
[7:04] Speaker 1: So what did you do prior?
[7:05] Speaker 2: I was a HR specialist. Okay. Yeah, for the Department
[7:08] Speaker 2: of Human Services.
[7:09] Speaker 1: Which is completely different to content creation.
[7:13] Speaker 2: Very corporate. Yeah. Very corporate, sitting at X, you know,
[7:16] Speaker 2: Monday to Friday, 9 to 5. For the federal government, like,
[7:18] Speaker 2: was very, very serious work. That was slowly destroying my soul.
[7:22] Speaker 1: Yeah, there you go.
[7:23] Speaker 2: When I got a MasterChef, I decided to resign and
[7:27] Speaker 2: I was lucky enough to get a redundancy. So that
[7:30] Speaker 2: gave me 12 months worth of salary.
[7:31] Speaker 1: So you've always had a passion for food? Like have
[7:34] Speaker 1: you always been one to be in the kitchen cooking?
[7:37] Speaker 2: And when I left school, I got offered two apprenticeships.
[7:39] Speaker 2: One was a chef and one was a hairdressing. My
[7:43] Speaker 2: mum really encouraged me to go down the hairdressing side
[7:45] Speaker 2: of things. My sister was already a hairdresser, my older sister.
[7:48] Speaker 2: And she was probably right at the time. Chef's a
[7:51] Speaker 2: very male-dominated industry. And hairdressing has been very good to me.
[7:56] Speaker 2: It's fed my babies. You know, I've been able to
[7:58] Speaker 2: do it from home while I was raising a family.
[8:00] Speaker 2: But yeah, I loved it back then when I was 17.
[8:03] Speaker 1: Isn't that fantastic? So if you look at yourself now
[8:06] Speaker 1: and back then when you were 17, could you have
[8:09] Speaker 1: even imagined you would have gone on MasterChef, now a
[8:12] Speaker 1: content creator?
[8:13] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[8:14] Speaker 1: Now sitting with me, having great times.
[8:16] Speaker 2: At 17, MasterChef didn't exist, nor did Facebook, Instagram, TikTok.
[8:22] Speaker 2: So I couldn't have even imagined.
[8:25] Speaker 1: That back then. Like it was just.
[8:27] Speaker 2: Not in the realm of possibility. The interweb wasn't around
[8:31] Speaker 2: back then. No, it wasn't.
[8:32] Speaker 1: Oh, my God, that's scary, isn't it?
[8:33] Speaker 2: I know, it is scary. That's absolutely scary. Yeah, that
[8:35] Speaker 2: didn't come along until I was like 22, 23, I think.
[8:38] Speaker 1: So how did you get your face on MasterChef and
[8:40] Speaker 1: did all that?
[8:41] Speaker 2: One day I was just sitting on the couch watching
[8:43] Speaker 2: MasterChef because I loved it, loved MasterChef, and I filled
[8:47] Speaker 2: in an application form, pushed submit, and then I just
[8:49] Speaker 2: turned around and went, oh, I just submitted an application form.
[8:52] Speaker 2: He goes, what the hell? And never even a million
[8:55] Speaker 2: years did I even think that I would even get
[8:57] Speaker 2: a reply. And I did. I got a reply to
[9:01] Speaker 2: invite me for an audition. It's quite a long process.
[9:04] Speaker 2: There's three different processes and then you get interviewed by
[9:06] Speaker 2: the world and blah, blah, blah. You get shortlisted at
[9:08] Speaker 2: each step. And I got right through the last step
[9:11] Speaker 2: and then I didn't make it through. It kind of
[9:13] Speaker 2: lit a bit of a fire in my belly and
[9:15] Speaker 2: I realised how much I really wanted to do that.
[9:18] Speaker 2: I spent the year practising and getting better. Every spare
[9:22] Speaker 2: minute I had I would cook, I would watch cooking,
[9:24] Speaker 2: I would read cooking, I would do everything towards cooking.
[9:27] Speaker 2: So basically put myself through an apprenticeship, applied the next year,
[9:30] Speaker 2: got through the same stage again, didn't get through. Devastated
[9:33] Speaker 2: because I was like a bit cocky.
[9:35] Speaker 1: And do they provide you feedback? Do they go, Steph,
[9:38] Speaker 1: you didn't cut your julienne carrots quite the right size?
[9:42] Speaker 1: Did they do any of that?
[9:43] Speaker 2: No, because once you get through that, where I got
[9:45] Speaker 2: to those two times, they say, You are good enough
[9:48] Speaker 2: for the show now, but now we have to put
[9:49] Speaker 2: a TV show together. So they say, you know, we're
[9:51] Speaker 2: going to have like, you know, they're going to have
[9:52] Speaker 2: certain demographic and people and cultural and all the rest
[9:56] Speaker 2: of it. And I just didn't make that cut. And
[9:57] Speaker 2: that was cool, but it was frustrating. But then the
[10:01] Speaker 2: third year, which I said, this is it. I'm not
[10:02] Speaker 2: doing it again. I made it. through so that was
[10:06] Speaker 2: six years ago now.
[10:07] Speaker 1: Six years ago.
[10:08] Speaker 2: Feels like a lifetime ago like I feel like in
[10:11] Speaker 2: that six years I have lived a lifetime because it
[10:14] Speaker 2: has been such a roller coaster over that six years
[10:18] Speaker 2: my life has just lit on its head. Well, probably
[10:21] Speaker 2: the same for you too, right?
[10:22] Speaker 1: Oh, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, definitely.
[10:24] Speaker 2: Yeah. So since 2019, 2020, or 2020, wasn't it? How
[10:29] Speaker 2: different is your life now compared to then?
[10:31] Speaker 1: Huge. Like I cannot get over the amount of stuff
[10:35] Speaker 1: that I've done, my own personal growth, like the things
[10:39] Speaker 1: that I've learned, my confidence. I mean, I come across
[10:42] Speaker 1: as a really confident person, but I'm really not that confident.
[10:45] Speaker 1: But as soon as I'm in, I'm on. Yeah, in
[10:49] Speaker 1: your creative mode. So you know when you decided that
[10:51] Speaker 1: you were going to look after your sister and she
[10:54] Speaker 1: passed then?
[10:55] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[10:56] Speaker 1: Did you have the confidence to go back in to
[10:58] Speaker 1: work or was that something you thought, no, that's finished now,
[11:01] Speaker 1: I'm going to try doing other things?
[11:04] Speaker 2: I think I had the confidence because I'd had a
[11:06] Speaker 2: little bit of success. So when I first came off MasterChef,
[11:10] Speaker 2: obviously I had a social media presence then and I
[11:13] Speaker 2: was actually doing what I thought you had to do
[11:16] Speaker 2: on social Instagram because Instagram was the thing then. So
[11:21] Speaker 2: I was showing people my beautiful life and the beautiful
[11:24] Speaker 2: food that I was eating and I was showing the
[11:26] Speaker 2: beautiful food that I cooked. But when I went on TikTok,
[11:30] Speaker 2: I had a different handle name. I had no followers.
[11:32] Speaker 2: So I was completely anonymous. And that gave me the
[11:36] Speaker 2: confidence to be who I really was on TikTok. So
[11:40] Speaker 2: I didn't go onto TikTok pretending to be the ex-MasterChef
[11:44] Speaker 2: contestant that cooked beautiful food and fancy plating and all
[11:46] Speaker 2: the rest of it. I was just Steph, mum, wife,
[11:50] Speaker 2: sisters just passed, blah, blah, blah.
[11:52] Speaker 1: Totally relatable. I know for me, when my brother passed
[11:57] Speaker 1: and my mum passed, I was completely lost for such
[12:01] Speaker 1: a long time. And so I had to then kind
[12:03] Speaker 1: of get back to even functioning like you. And then
[12:08] Speaker 1: it was with the confidence of getting in front of
[12:11] Speaker 1: my iPhone. But then I started seeing other people saying,
[12:16] Speaker 1: I relate to this Chrissy.
[12:17] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[12:18] Speaker 1: I don't have my mum anymore. I don't have my brother.
[12:21] Speaker 1: It's hard. I know what you're going through. So then
[12:23] Speaker 1: it was all really for me, I'm not alone. There's
[12:27] Speaker 1: lots of people out there that have experienced the same
[12:29] Speaker 1: thing as me. So then I started building my confidence.
[12:33] Speaker 2: Because people give you that little bit of something.
[12:35] Speaker 1: They do.
[12:36] Speaker 2: A little bit of feedback to say that you're relatable.
[12:39] Speaker 2: And you get that with views and with comments and
[12:42] Speaker 2: things like that. When you get that feedback that you,
[12:47] Speaker 2: the real you, is okay and people are interested in
[12:50] Speaker 2: the real you, it gives you permission to be you. Yeah,
[12:53] Speaker 2: it does. So now I am unapologetically me on social media.
[12:58] Speaker 1: I love that.
[12:58] Speaker 2: And that's what led to my success because when I
[13:02] Speaker 2: was trying to be something else, it wasn't really working.
[13:05] Speaker 2: Like I had like, I think when I came off Mastiff,
[13:08] Speaker 2: I had 13,000 followers on Instagram and that was pretty good, right?
[13:12] Speaker 2: But the second I stopped being that.
[13:15] Speaker 1: Authentically you.
[13:16] Speaker 2: I started being authentically me. I grew 800,000 followers in
[13:21] Speaker 2: 12 months.
[13:21] Speaker 1: Isn't that incredible?
[13:23] Speaker 2: Just by being myself. Like that's really good feedback to
[13:26] Speaker 2: say it's okay to be yourself, right?
[13:28] Speaker 1: Absolutely. Did you have the white ants though in your
[13:31] Speaker 1: head saying, oh, you know, you're not that good.
[13:34] Speaker 2: You know what? No, I didn't have them in my head,
[13:36] Speaker 2: but I had them from other people. Because I had
[13:40] Speaker 2: kind of turned my back on that side of me,
[13:44] Speaker 2: I know people were sort of laughing at me and
[13:49] Speaker 2: I kind of lost the food industry's credibility because I
[13:53] Speaker 2: started cooking curry sausages, like, you know, four-ingredient pasta dinners
[13:59] Speaker 2: and two-ingredient flatbreads and, you know, all this kind of
[14:01] Speaker 2: just easy, easy food. Dinner that 99.9% of Australia cook
[14:06] Speaker 2: for dinner every night. Absolutely. That's what I was doing.
[14:09] Speaker 2: But I was no longer a food snob. Oh. And
[14:12] Speaker 2: the food snobs didn't like it. Kind of looked down
[14:16] Speaker 2: on me and I think still do to a certain extent.
[14:18] Speaker 1: Really? Do you even care?
[14:20] Speaker 2: No, I don't care because I look at the success
[14:22] Speaker 2: that I've had and I look at the fact that
[14:24] Speaker 2: I've got three best-selling cookbooks.
[14:26] Speaker 1: Isn't that amazing?
[14:28] Speaker 2: And I look at other people, I call them the
[14:30] Speaker 2: food snobs, that's pretty judgy, judgy of me. I probably
[14:32] Speaker 2: shouldn't say that.
[14:33] Speaker 1: Oh, well, you're amongst friends. I am amongst friends. You
[14:35] Speaker 1: can say whatever you want.
[14:36] Speaker 2: They don't sell that many books. People love to look
[14:40] Speaker 2: at that. They love to look at pretty things and
[14:42] Speaker 2: look at pretty food, but they're not cooking it.
[14:43] Speaker 1: Well, they're not going to drop the pasta sauce on it,
[14:46] Speaker 1: are they, as they're.
[14:46] Speaker 2: Cooking the dish? And they're not climbing the freaking Himalayas
[14:49] Speaker 2: to find a truffle that costs them, you know, $ 400
[14:53] Speaker 2: an ounce to cook with. Like, it's just not realistic. Yeah. Like,
[14:59] Speaker 2: I cook in my pyjamas. I cook in my bed hair.
[15:01] Speaker 2: I don't wear a bra. I don't have makeup in
[15:04] Speaker 2: my videos. Unapologetically me now. Yeah. Yeah.
[15:07] Speaker 1: And do you reckon since menopause that's even taken the
[15:11] Speaker 1: mask off even more?
[15:13] Speaker 2: This has happened to me through menopause. So I don't
[15:15] Speaker 2: know whether it's as a result of menopause that I've
[15:18] Speaker 2: done this, but I know my give a shit factor
[15:22] Speaker 2: of what other people think about me. There's still some
[15:24] Speaker 2: people I care about with that. Like I care what
[15:27] Speaker 2: my family think of me. Yeah, of course. You know,
[15:30] Speaker 2: I care about it, but I don't allow it really
[15:32] Speaker 2: to stop me from doing much.
[15:34] Speaker 1: Yeah, see. Isn't that interesting?
[15:35] Speaker 2: The things I wouldn't do because of my kids.
[15:37] Speaker 1: Your only fan page.
[15:38] Speaker 2: I wouldn't flash my boobs. No. Because that would embarrass
[15:42] Speaker 2: my kids.
[15:43] Speaker 1: And, you know, burn my corneas.
[15:45] Speaker 2: I would imagine that it would.
[15:46] Speaker 1: Thank you. I would appreciate that.
[15:47] Speaker 2: But, you know, throw enough money at me.
[15:49] Speaker 1: Hey, look, we're open to the dollar. Okay? We're open
[15:53] Speaker 1: to the dollar. I reckon since menopause is now finally over, right?
[15:57] Speaker 1: I'm past menopause now. Post-menopausal.
[16:00] Speaker 2: Tick.
[16:01] Speaker 1: Tick, done.
[16:02] Speaker 2: You know, menopause is only a day. It's a day.
[16:06] Speaker 2: So it's pre and post menopause.
[16:08] Speaker 1: Pre and post. It's 12 months past your last period.
[16:11] Speaker 2: So it's literally, okay, it's 12 months past my last period.
[16:14] Speaker 2: I'm through menopause. I'm done. The impact is leading up
[16:17] Speaker 2: to that and post that.
[16:20] Speaker 1: And post that. So for me, I had a mask on.
[16:24] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[16:24] Speaker 1: All my life I have worn a mask. So I
[16:27] Speaker 1: will be exactly what you want me to be in
[16:30] Speaker 1: every situation.
[16:31] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[16:32] Speaker 1: Be it school, social life, boyfriend, family, I will be
[16:38] Speaker 1: that little whatever you want me to do. Right? When
[16:41] Speaker 1: my mum died, when my brother died and I was post,
[16:44] Speaker 1: that mask came flying off and I was angry. I
[16:50] Speaker 1: would get the shits. The noise in my head, it
[16:54] Speaker 1: was really useless. The food noise was horrendous. this is
[16:59] Speaker 1: it now. Because by that stage, the boysies had moved out.
[17:03] Speaker 1: And so I was like, not on the phone, but
[17:05] Speaker 1: I would wait for them to call me to say,
[17:07] Speaker 1: do you want to come out for a coffee, mum?
[17:09] Speaker 1: So I had literally stood still.
[17:11] Speaker 2: Yeah, waiting for them. Right?
[17:12] Speaker 1: Because I was waiting for them. I was working with
[17:15] Speaker 1: a great boss, did everything I wanted to do, loving
[17:18] Speaker 1: my socials. And I thought, if I don't start doing
[17:21] Speaker 1: something soon for me, I am going to be on
[17:24] Speaker 1: that couch for the rest of my life, resentful that
[17:29] Speaker 1: I didn't go and live my best life after, you know,
[17:32] Speaker 1: the kids had left home, the menopause, my mum had gone,
[17:35] Speaker 1: my brother had gone. You know, it was only me now.
[17:38] Speaker 1: And I thought I need to reinvent myself, get out there,
[17:43] Speaker 1: push the boat, make changes and So now I gave
[17:48] Speaker 1: up work three weeks ago.
[17:49] Speaker 2: That's amazing.
[17:50] Speaker 1: I've now retired. I am self-employed.
[17:52] Speaker 2: Now you're not retired.
[17:53] Speaker 1: Yes, I've been employed.
[17:54] Speaker 2: What am I?
[17:54] Speaker 1: Self-employed. I feel the most empowered I have felt, I
[17:59] Speaker 1: don't think, ever. Like I feel I could leap buildings
[18:04] Speaker 1: in a single bound.
[18:05] Speaker 2: See, you are exactly where I was. Wow. Because that's
[18:08] Speaker 2: what I did. I did exactly the same thing when
[18:11] Speaker 2: I went on MasterChef. I was like, all right, I'm done.
[18:13] Speaker 2: That's it. See? Right in the sand. I am not.
[18:16] Speaker 1: It's the line.
[18:16] Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm not going to do this because I felt
[18:19] Speaker 2: like if I didn't quit, I was going to die
[18:21] Speaker 2: in that chair. Absolutely. And I was watching all these
[18:23] Speaker 2: people around me retire that had been doing that. And
[18:27] Speaker 2: you know what I was watching as well? As soon
[18:29] Speaker 2: as they retired, you know what was happening? They were
[18:31] Speaker 2: having a heart attack or they were having a knee
[18:33] Speaker 2: replacement or they were dying and not enjoying that part
[18:38] Speaker 2: of their lives. I thought, I don't want to be that.
[18:40] Speaker 2: Do not want to be that.
[18:41] Speaker 1: It was like a light bulb moment for me when
[18:44] Speaker 1: Christian and I went to Bali and we had the retreat.
[18:47] Speaker 1: The retreat was amazing. Amazing. And then we went to
[18:52] Speaker 1: an island. It was like the light bulb for me
[18:54] Speaker 1: was I can't work anymore. I need to leave work.
[18:57] Speaker 1: And if I die on my deathbed and think, oh,
[19:01] Speaker 1: my goodness, I should have done something. I should have
[19:05] Speaker 1: pursued still social. I should have pursued my content creation.
[19:09] Speaker 1: I should have pursued all these things that I didn't.
[19:12] Speaker 1: It would have been a wasted life. Yeah.
[19:14] Speaker 2: I think that's the thing is that you just can't.
[19:17] Speaker 2: There's a lot of women that get to our age
[19:21] Speaker 2: that are now thinking that, but they're not acting on it.
[19:24] Speaker 1: Because I don't think they know how to start.
[19:26] Speaker 2: But also it's hard because financially it's difficult. I was
[19:30] Speaker 2: lucky that Nev had a great job and he could
[19:32] Speaker 2: support me during that five years where I didn't make
[19:34] Speaker 2: any money, like probably four years where I didn't make
[19:36] Speaker 2: a cent. I had that support of my family to
[19:40] Speaker 2: do that. There's a lot of women out there that
[19:41] Speaker 2: don't have it, like don't have the capacity or have
[19:43] Speaker 2: the support to do that. So to actually quit their job.
[19:46] Speaker 2: It's impossible, really. Yeah. But I think there's things you
[19:49] Speaker 2: can do.
[19:49] Speaker 1: Oh, everyone loves a side hustle. Us women are very,
[19:53] Speaker 1: very good at, you know.
[19:54] Speaker 2: We are very good at side hustles.
[19:55] Speaker 1: Absolutely. And making something out of nothing.
[19:58] Speaker 2: But also it's not all just about money either, is it?
[20:00] Speaker 2: You can still work your day job and still have
[20:02] Speaker 2: a better life. You don't need to get divorced, quit
[20:06] Speaker 2: your job. Create a social media account. Like, you don't
[20:10] Speaker 2: have to do that.
[20:10] Speaker 1: Get a match and throw it in.
[20:11] Speaker 2: I mean, we were pretty extreme, I think, at that end.
[20:14] Speaker 2: I don't think you have to do that.
[20:15] Speaker 1: Do you think? See, I don't think we are anymore.
[20:17] Speaker 1: I think there are more and more women out there
[20:20] Speaker 1: our age that are going, hey, my kids are growing up.
[20:23] Speaker 1: They've left home. I want to travel. I want to
[20:25] Speaker 1: see more of the world. I want more from this life.
[20:29] Speaker 1: I don't want to be working a nine-to-five job anymore.
[20:32] Speaker 2: I agree there are more people wanting to do that.
[20:34] Speaker 2: But I also don't want people, our wing woman, to
[20:37] Speaker 2: feel less because they haven't done that.
[20:39] Speaker 1: Oh, my God, absolutely not.
[20:40] Speaker 2: Because I feel like it's a want. I don't want
[20:42] Speaker 2: you to feel like you're a failure if you're not
[20:44] Speaker 2: doing that. But I feel like there are things you
[20:47] Speaker 2: can do and steps you can take You don't have
[20:49] Speaker 2: to upend your entire life. No. In order to.
[20:51] Speaker 1: But if you want to, us girls are here for you.
[20:54] Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
[20:54] Speaker 1: And, you know, we're here to take on any questions
[20:57] Speaker 1: that you may have.
[20:58] Speaker 2: On how to do that.
[20:59] Speaker 1: On how to do that. And we encourage you to,
[21:02] Speaker 1: you know, chat to us in our socials. Yeah. And
[21:05] Speaker 1: get some great feedback so that we can help you.
[21:08] Speaker 2: And if you want to throw your life on its head.
[21:11] Speaker 2: It's okay. It works out.
[21:13] Speaker 1: And we will do just a little disclaimer. We are
[21:15] Speaker 1: certainly not a financial advisor. Oh, no.
[21:19] Speaker 2: Like, hello.
[21:19] Speaker 1: Life coaching. We've shaken that tree. My God, the leaves
[21:24] Speaker 1: are bare, mate.
[21:25] Speaker 2: Not a lot left.
[21:26] Speaker 1: Well, you're looking great.
[21:27] Speaker 2: Yes, are you?
[21:29] Speaker 1: You're looking fantastic. Can you believe that's our very first
[21:32] Speaker 1: episode done and dusted? How do you feel? What is it?
[21:35] Speaker 2: I don't think we did anything that we said that
[21:37] Speaker 2: we were going to do.
[21:38] Speaker 1: Can I say to you, when you were at your laptop,
[21:40] Speaker 1: I'm thinking, babes, we just start talking and we'll be fine.
[21:43] Speaker 2: Honestly, the ADHD girls have definitely come out in that
[21:47] Speaker 2: episode and it's gone from one extreme to the other.
[21:49] Speaker 2: And the wing girls are there.
[21:50] Speaker 1: And that's okay. The wing girls, people love it. Yeah.
[21:53] Speaker 2: Should we give them a little hint of what we're
[21:55] Speaker 2: going to talk about next week? Even though we probably
[21:56] Speaker 2: won't even stick to it.
[21:58] Speaker 1: Oh, no. But we'll give you a brief outline of possibilities.
[22:00] Speaker 2: Okay. Episode two. Go. Is this what we thought 50
[22:04] Speaker 2: would look like? Oh. Hang on, I'll just give you
[22:07] Speaker 2: a little tease. When we were 25, 50 sounded ancient.
[22:11] Speaker 1: Oh my God, it was so.
[22:13] Speaker 2: Now we're here and somehow we still don't feel like
[22:17] Speaker 2: proper adults. I still feel 25. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.
[22:21] Speaker 2: Next episode.
[22:21] Speaker 1: You need to stop.
[22:22] Speaker 2: Next episode.

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