# Enlightenment Is an Inside Job: Explore Your Depths to Reach Your Heights

An episode of [Red Pill Shaman](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/6799461351), 18 Sep 2026, 42 min.

Audio: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2526778/episodes/19791715-enlightenment-is-an-inside-job-explore-your-depths-to-reach-your-heights.mp3

Send us Fan Mail Red Pill Shaman joined Evergreen Podcast Network. In this episode, we dive into how to break free from unconscious cycles, heal generational trauma, and unlock true transformation by making your darkness conscious. 📘 Get Your FREE DIY Trauma Healing Resources: 1) Webinar 2) Meditation and Shamanic Drumming 3) Six Divine Feminine Self Love Strategies TWO Free eBooks: 1) Poems of the Sovereign Soul 2) Wisdom of Peace Plan ⚠️ CONTENT WARNING: This episode contains honest discussions of mental illness and a past suicide attempt. My story is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice. Please listen with care. 📖 About This Episode: We break down the esoteric secrets of the Woman of Valor poem (Eshet Chayil) from Proverbs 31:10, revealing how it represents Sophia (Divine Wisdom) alongside the raw power of a spiritual warrior. You will learn how cosmic femininity requires a trinity of completion, balancing the cosmic order of Sophia with the unapologetic, fierce autonomy of the Lilith archetype and the dual-natured shadow integration of the Persephone archetype. By looking through the lens of depth psychology, Aramaic scriptural mistranslations (Abwoon), and the mystical mechanics of the Jewish High Holidays, Kerry May Blaser maps out how descending into your subconscious underworld is the only path to authentic, real-time enlightenment. She shares the ultimate raw truth of her own 2019 suicide attempt and how her two daughters acted as extreme mythic catalysts—Persephone igniting the darkness and Lilith ensuring her survival—to catapult her soul to its absolute heights. The Lord’s Prayer Modern Translation Our father who art in heaven Hallowed be thy name Thy kingdom come Thy will be done on earth, as it is in heaven Give us this day our daily bread And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory, forever. Amen. Aramaic Translation O Birther! Father-Mother of the Cosmos. You create all that moves in light. Focus your light within us – make it useful: as the rays of a beacon show the way. Create your reign of unity now – through our fiery hearts and willing hands. Your one desire then acts with ours, as in all light, so in all forms. Grant what we need each day in bread and insight: subsistence for the call of growing life. Loose the cords of mistakes binding us, as we release the strands we hold of others’ guilt. Don’t let surface things delude us. But free us from what holds us back. From you is born all ruling will, the power and the life to do, the song that beautifies all, from age to age it renews. Truly – power to these statements – may they be the source from which all my actions grow. Sealed in trust and faith. Amen. 💡 What We Cover In This Video: ✅ How Eshet Chayil (Woman of Valor) serves as a military-grade term for a spiritual warrior. ✅ The feminine trinity of cosmic completion: Balancing Sophia, Lilith, and Persephone archetypes. ✅ Re-parenting the subconscious and breaking free from inherited generational trauma. ✅ The Aramaic translation of "The Lord's Prayer" (Abwoon) and restoring the Divine Mother to the cosmos. 🌸 About Kerry Blaser: Kerry Blaser is a mother, shaman, religious studies scholar, and author. Her diverse background directly supports her mission to help individuals break free from restrictive paradigms and reclaim their internal locus of control. Bringing a unique multidisciplinary approach to the table, Kerry synthesizes depth psychology, neuroscience, mysticism, anthropology, and consciousness studies. By connecting these diverse fields, she maps how unconscious internal emotional patterns project outward to shape our physical reality, equipping people with the clarity needed to transform pain into resilience and build deeply authentic, balanced relationships. 🌐 Connect With Me: ● Website:…

## Transcript

[0:00] SPEAKER_00: On my forty-fifth birthday, my mother passed away.
[0:03] SPEAKER_00: A few hours later, my intuition told me to accept my psychic gifts and heal from my childhood trauma.
[0:11] SPEAKER_00: At the time, I was 30 pounds overweight, taking several strong medications like trazidone and clonopen and getting several migraines per week.
[0:21] SPEAKER_00: I was a mess.
[0:22] SPEAKER_00: But I listened to myself and began learning how to descend into my darkness, my emotional pain, in order to transform it into personal wisdom.
[0:32] SPEAKER_00: Two years later, I made a breakthrough.
[0:35] SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Red Pill Shaman, where we are shattering the matrix from the inside out.
[0:41] SPEAKER_00: This is where we strip away societal programming to examine history, ancient prophecy, and ourselves through the dual lens of quantum physics and analytical psychology.
[0:53] SPEAKER_00: Why do I take this approach?
[0:55] SPEAKER_00: Because Einstein taught us that the field is the sole governing agency of the particle, and Carl Jung proved that changing the world is an inside job.
[1:06] SPEAKER_00: Today we start by connecting the Woman of Valor poem from the old testament to how I overcame a suicide attempt and brought healing to my whole family.
[1:18] SPEAKER_00: This episode contains honest discussions of mental illness and a past suicide attempt.
[1:24] SPEAKER_00: My story is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.
[1:33] SPEAKER_00: Please listen with care.
[1:40] SPEAKER_00: Her worth is far beyond rubies.
[1:42] SPEAKER_00: Nothing you desire can compare to her.
[1:45] SPEAKER_00: She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
[1:50] SPEAKER_00: Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain.
[1:53] SPEAKER_00: But a woman whose reverence is for the eternal, she shall be praised.
[1:59] SPEAKER_00: These are just a few lines from the Woman of Valor poem, Eshet Halil, from Proverbs 31:10.
[2:06] SPEAKER_00: They represent Sophia who embodies divine wisdom, cosmic order, and spiritual insight.
[2:12] SPEAKER_00: The entire poem shows a woman who is a leader in her community and her household, a businesswoman, a real estate holder, and a spiritual warrior who embodies divine feminine wisdom.
[2:26] SPEAKER_00: She is her husband's equal, and her gifts uplift him to a status of honor.
[2:31] SPEAKER_00: I use the word warrior because the title uses the word valor, which is a military term in Aramaic.
[2:38] SPEAKER_00: The Hebrew word used in this poem is halil, which literally means an army, a force, or wealth and resource.
[2:46] SPEAKER_00: Today we will focus on how a woman of valor is a spiritual warrior who embodies divine feminine wisdom, Sophia.
[2:55] SPEAKER_00: My soul's name is Sophia, and I am just one part of cosmic femininity.
[3:02] SPEAKER_00: Three is the number of completion, which is why I have two daughters.
[3:07] SPEAKER_00: One personifies Lilith, and one embodies Persephone.
[3:11] SPEAKER_00: Lilith represents unapologetic feminine sovereignty, physical power, and the embrace of the night.
[3:19] SPEAKER_00: Rather than being a submissive figure, she acts with absolute autonomy.
[3:24] SPEAKER_00: Last but definitely not least, Persephone is defined by duality, the transition between the harvest of the upper world and the icy depths of the underworld, balancing duty, innocence, and severe psychological transformation.
[3:41] SPEAKER_00: When the three act in unison, the divine feminine is fully revealed.
[3:46] SPEAKER_00: My ascension from a mentally ill mother to an enlightened matriarch was not possible without my two daughters.
[3:53] SPEAKER_00: Persephone ignited my darkness when her words broke my will to live during my suicide attempt.
[4:00] SPEAKER_00: She took my soul from the upper world into my own underworld.
[4:05] SPEAKER_00: Then Lilith saved me from the depths of my despair the next morning when she found me and called 911.
[4:12] SPEAKER_00: I did not transform my darkness, my shadow alone.
[4:16] SPEAKER_00: Little did I know at the time, but they were helping me reach the depths of my soul to help catapult me to my soul's heights, enlightenment.
[4:26] SPEAKER_00: How do you think enlightenment happens?
[4:29] SPEAKER_00: Welcome to season two, Woman of Valor, Episode Two.
[4:57] SPEAKER_00: My father's parents divorced in the 1950s, only to remarry eight years later.
[5:03] SPEAKER_00: My mother was the second born to her mother, but the family repressed that truth by showcasing her as the oldest sibling and her older half-sister as her aunt.
[5:15] SPEAKER_00: My grandmother had gotten pregnant at 16, but was refused marriage.
[5:20] SPEAKER_00: She gave birth to my aunt, who was raised by my great-grandmother.
[5:25] SPEAKER_00: When my grandmother passed away at 82, my aunt still didn't know the truth of their relationship, even though they were extremely close.
[5:34] SPEAKER_00: My mom was engaged three times prior to my father, who is four years her junior.
[5:40] SPEAKER_00: Both of my parents' families had a lot of repressed emotional darkness that was never unearthed.
[5:46] SPEAKER_00: My parents were married for 10 years prior to getting a divorce when I was six.
[5:53] SPEAKER_00: I moved in with my mother and my brother into an apartment in a wealthy town in Southern California on the back side of Malibu.
[6:02] SPEAKER_00: My mother stayed home until I was about nine, but she was a smoker and alcoholic.
[6:08] SPEAKER_00: My father was a workaholic who only saw us every other weekend.
[6:13] SPEAKER_00: They did their best to raise us well, but I internalized their emotional wounds through a process called generational trauma.
[6:21] SPEAKER_00: In my family, problems were swept under the rug as my parents both came from households that did the same.
[6:29] SPEAKER_00: They had never learned to process their emotional pain.
[6:33] SPEAKER_00: So how were they supposed to teach me how to do it?
[6:36] SPEAKER_00: They never went through a process called reparenting, where an adult learns to transform their emotional pain into personal wisdom, creating a mature relationship with themselves and others.
[6:48] SPEAKER_00: Since I only learned how to reparent myself in my late 40s and early 50s, I attracted my husband into my life when I was still mentally ill.
[6:57] SPEAKER_00: He is from Israel and also came from a dysfunctional family.
[7:01] SPEAKER_00: Wisdom says the universe is a mirror, showing me myself in every moment as a constant feedback loop for self-improvement.
[7:08] SPEAKER_00: Knowledge says we attract what we are through energetic resonance, meaning a vibrational match.
[7:14] SPEAKER_00: I was a vibrational match for a man with unhealed trauma.
[7:18] SPEAKER_00: So I attracted relationship problems into my life.
[7:22] SPEAKER_00: I had my children about 20 years prior to when I started healing my emotional wounds.
[7:28] SPEAKER_00: So my three children were on the receiving end of generational trauma, just like me.
[7:33] SPEAKER_00: They all have Hebrew names, Ethan, Yael, and Orly.
[7:37] SPEAKER_00: I always wanted to name my son Ethan, and I didn't know that it was a biblical name.
[7:42] SPEAKER_00: It is an adjective meaning firm, strong, enduring, or long-lived.
[7:46] SPEAKER_00: When I got pregnant with a boy, my ex-husband naturally agreed to my favorite boy name, Ethan.
[7:52] SPEAKER_00: He is an Eagle Scout and second-degree black belt in Taekwondo.
[7:56] SPEAKER_00: I am very proud of his accomplishments as he struggled severely at home in my dysfunctional family, understandably so.
[8:04] SPEAKER_00: Then my ex-husband had two close female friends, Yael and Orley.
[8:09] SPEAKER_00: When I got pregnant two more times with girls, those were their natural names.
[8:14] SPEAKER_00: My oldest daughter is named Yael, a biblical name from the Book of Judges.
[8:18] SPEAKER_00: Yael was a female judge and a prominent military heroine.
[8:23] SPEAKER_00: She is celebrated for her exceptional courage and valor in single-handedly delivering Israel from their oppressive Canaanite enemies.
[8:31] SPEAKER_00: To summarize her valor, she lured the enemy of the opposing army into a tent and killed him while he slept by driving a tent peg through his temple, killing him instantly.
[8:43] SPEAKER_00: I associate her with Lilith's strength and personal sovereignty, as Lilith refused to submit to Adam because they were created from the same dust, so they were equal.
[8:54] SPEAKER_00: Yael just got her marketing degree and has her own jewelry and photography business.
[9:00] SPEAKER_00: My youngest daughter is named Orly, which means my light in Hebrew.
[9:05] SPEAKER_00: Orly is not a biblical name.
[9:07] SPEAKER_00: It is a name created by modern day Israelis when they revived Hebrew as a living language.
[9:13] SPEAKER_00: She reminds me of Persephone as she lights up my darkness as a catalyst to my personal transformation.
[9:20] SPEAKER_00: She is an amazing florist, creating the most extravagant, elegant, and intuitive arrangements.
[9:27] SPEAKER_00: Persephone is intimately associated with flowers because they serve as the catalyst for her transformation, the literal mechanism of the changing seasons and the ultimate symbol of her dual identity as both the joyful goddess of spring and the sovereign queen of the underworld.
[9:46] SPEAKER_00: Flowers start as a seed in the dark earth, only to grow upwards into the light, blooming into their true beauty over time.
[9:55] SPEAKER_00: That's my orally girl.
[9:56] SPEAKER_00: Now that I have introduced you to my amazing children, let's get back to my story of transformation.
[10:03] SPEAKER_00: On my 45th birthday, my mother passed away.
[10:07] SPEAKER_00: A few hours later, my intuition told me to accept my psychic gifts and heal from my childhood trauma.
[10:14] SPEAKER_00: At the time, I was 30 pounds overweight, taking several strong medications like trazodone and quanopin, and getting several migraines per week.
[10:24] SPEAKER_00: I was a mess.
[10:25] SPEAKER_00: But I listened to myself and began learning how to descend into my darkness, my emotional pain, in order to transform it into personal wisdom.
[10:36] SPEAKER_00: Two years later, I made a breakthrough.
[10:38] SPEAKER_00: I was finally able to talk to my subconscious, my underworld, to understand my personal dysfunction, a process called reparenting.
[10:46] SPEAKER_00: Here is an example of reparenting.
[10:49] SPEAKER_00: When I was 47 years old, I got into a fight with Orly.
[10:54] SPEAKER_00: I was wrong and needed to apologize.
[10:56] SPEAKER_00: I asked myself why I was struggling to apologize to my daughter.
[11:01] SPEAKER_00: My subconscious told me, you believe that if you apologize, your loved ones will leave you.
[11:08] SPEAKER_00: I thought to myself, that's not logical.
[11:11] SPEAKER_00: If I apologize like a healthy person, they will want to stay.
[11:15] SPEAKER_00: In that moment, I realized that when I acted from my subconscious lies, like this one, I destroyed my personal relationships.
[11:24] SPEAKER_00: I had finally realized that my subconscious was filled with crap and inverted wisdom, like apologizing equals relationship death.
[11:35] SPEAKER_00: I immediately called her back to apologize, which strengthened our relationship.
[11:39] SPEAKER_00: That was just the beginning of how much crap I found in my subconscious.
[11:44] SPEAKER_00: While challenging, I had to learn that going through that process as often as possible is how I learned how to surf the waves of life, meaning process my emotions.
[11:56] SPEAKER_00: It is how I learned how to go into my fear, guilt, and shame in my subconscious and transform it into wisdom, creating a healthier, more mature self.
[12:08] SPEAKER_00: I was reparenting myself.
[12:10] SPEAKER_00: My children were instrumental in that process.
[12:13] SPEAKER_00: Here is the best example of how my daughters played their roles as Lilith and Persephone during my suicide attempt in April 2019.
[12:23] SPEAKER_00: Orley was in rehab for an eating disorder.
[12:26] SPEAKER_00: I went there for our first family therapy session.
[12:29] SPEAKER_00: Her therapist had taught her that eating disorders are a maternal wound, so she blamed me solely for her challenges with food.
[12:40] SPEAKER_00: Of course I had culpability, but I did not live in a vacuum, so I fought back.
[12:45] SPEAKER_00: I argued that our whole family was dysfunctional, to no avail.
[12:50] SPEAKER_00: On the way home, I started to blame myself more and more, as I tend to be masochistic more than sadistic.
[12:59] SPEAKER_00: A few hours after I got home, I heard in my head, your children would be better off with a dead mother than a live one.
[13:07] SPEAKER_00: I tried to accommodate that belief by taking all of the medication I had, which had just been refilled.
[13:14] SPEAKER_00: I took about 75 Trazodone, 120 clonopin, 60 soma, and 5 ambion.
[13:22] SPEAKER_00: I walked straight upstairs, laid on my bed, and fell asleep instantly.
[13:26] SPEAKER_00: I just let go.
[13:28] SPEAKER_00: The next morning, Yael arrived at my house to pick me up to go to an event at Orly's rehab.
[13:34] SPEAKER_00: She found me barely clinging to life.
[13:36] SPEAKER_00: She called 911, who rushed me to the hospital.
[13:39] SPEAKER_00: I was intubated for three days.
[13:41] SPEAKER_00: When I opened my eyes, Yael was there, ensuring my survival.
[13:45] SPEAKER_00: True to form, Orly or Persephone was the catalyst taking me into my own underworld, my darkness, where Yael or Lilith met me in my darkness to bring me back into the light.
[13:59] SPEAKER_00: Orly showed me myself and Yael saved me from myself.
[14:04] SPEAKER_00: I couldn't have done it without them.
[14:06] SPEAKER_00: Now I'm gonna stop right here for a second and say that I am not advocating for a suicide attempt for anybody.
[14:14] SPEAKER_00: I just want to make that clear, okay?
[14:16] SPEAKER_00: Now I'm gonna get back to my story with my son.
[14:18] SPEAKER_00: While in the psych ward, my son, Ethan, visited me.
[14:22] SPEAKER_00: He said that he hadn't heard me laugh so hard since he was 12 years old.
[14:26] SPEAKER_00: He was almost 21 at the time.
[14:28] SPEAKER_00: That is how mentally ill, how depressed I had been for those nine years, that I couldn't even have a true belly laugh.
[14:36] SPEAKER_00: I completely let go when I attempted suicide.
[14:39] SPEAKER_00: All of my children helped me come back to life.
[14:43] SPEAKER_00: Two weeks later, I told Yale that I am bringing healing to the whole family, and we aren't leaving her dad behind.
[14:49] SPEAKER_00: I have stayed true to my word.
[14:51] SPEAKER_00: Almost exactly five years later, on March 13th, 2024, I had my first enlightenment experience, which is the pinnacle of learning how to surf the waves of life.
[15:02] SPEAKER_00: At the time, I didn't know that enlightenment is an emotion.
[15:06] SPEAKER_00: I had learned about enlightenment while getting my undergraduate and graduate degrees in Chinese religious studies at the University of California at Santa Barbara.
[15:16] SPEAKER_00: I had learned that it was a rarely attainable state of being.
[15:20] SPEAKER_00: No one ever used the word emotion.
[15:22] SPEAKER_00: It was during that enlightenment experience where I ascertained the source of both my own and the world's imbalance called the patriarchy.
[15:32] SPEAKER_00: Institutionalized Christianity had ascribed creation of feminine virtue to a masculine god erroneously.
[15:39] SPEAKER_00: I had internalized feminine repression modeled by Christianity, so I didn't value my feminine self.
[15:46] SPEAKER_00: Here is how modern biblical translations use father instead of the true translation father-mother.
[15:53] SPEAKER_00: Jesus spoke Aramaic, which doesn't use a masculine word to describe God, heaven, or the cosmos.
[16:01] SPEAKER_00: Modern translations of the Lord's Prayer in Matthew 6.9 state, our Father who art in heaven, where Aramaic states, O birther, Father, Mother of the Cosmos.
[16:14] SPEAKER_00: That is the exact problem I saw during my first enlightenment experience, but I was unaware of these translation differences at the time.
[16:23] SPEAKER_00: Let's look further at Aramaic to understand how the Bible was mistranslated in support of a masculine only God.
[16:31] SPEAKER_00: When looking specifically at how the word cosmos operates grammatically in Aramaic, it is both masculine and feminine, holding a profound relational balance between men and women.
[16:43] SPEAKER_00: Aramaic does not view the creator of the cosmos as masculine only, as represented in institutionalized Christianity.
[16:52] SPEAKER_00: Ober, father-mother of the cosmos, is a translation of Aramaic pronounced as Abu Won Di Washmaya.
[17:00] SPEAKER_00: Abuon is a deliberate blending of two polarities.
[17:04] SPEAKER_00: Ab is the divine masculine seed, the absolute point of origin or father.
[17:09] SPEAKER_00: Woon is the divine feminine womb, the nurturing hold or mother.
[17:19] SPEAKER_00: But its root is feminine associated with water.
[17:22] SPEAKER_00: The current translations using the word father gave rise to the patriarchy, suppressing the role of the feminine to enhance the role of the masculine erroneously to our own detriment.
[17:33] SPEAKER_00: During my first enlightenment experience, I was shown all the mental illness in society, looking at the breakdown of the family and romantic relationships.
[17:45] SPEAKER_00: I said, everything is messed up.
[17:47] SPEAKER_00: Take me back to the beginning.
[17:48] SPEAKER_00: There was God and then what happened?
[17:51] SPEAKER_00: I'm an analyst by nature, so I started thinking about God being male and responsible for creation.
[17:58] SPEAKER_00: I thought inquisitively that creation is a feminine virtue.
[18:02] SPEAKER_00: Then I analyzed what would happen if we make the divine feminine as equal to the divine masculine and mirror that in families and societies.
[18:12] SPEAKER_00: I saw that imbalance as a source of my own and the world's problems.
[18:17] SPEAKER_00: I didn't value my femininity, my capacity to create, nor my capacity to be intuitive, compassionate, nurturing, or wise.
[18:27] SPEAKER_00: After that analysis, I was shown catastrophic fears I had stored in my subconscious regarding my children and their father.
[18:35] SPEAKER_00: My soul was giving me an opportunity to bring these fears out of my underworld and into the light.
[18:42] SPEAKER_00: Again, the worst of my fears were about my youngest.
[18:46] SPEAKER_00: So again, she led me to my darkness.
[18:49] SPEAKER_00: My experience lasted three days, where I sat in my recliner in the dark in my garage without eating, drinking, or sleeping much.
[18:58] SPEAKER_00: I was in great shape, but I lost 12 pounds in the process.
[19:01] SPEAKER_00: Two days later, my oldest daughter again showed up to help me get out of my darkness and ground me back into reality.
[19:10] SPEAKER_00: She challenged me about my experience the most, questioning whether I was mentally ill or enlightened.
[19:16] SPEAKER_00: She was the catalyst for me to figure out how to determine if I had actually experienced enlightenment.
[19:21] SPEAKER_00: So I jumped into research.
[19:23] SPEAKER_00: First, I leaned on the work of Dr.
[19:26] SPEAKER_00: David R.
[19:26] SPEAKER_00: Hawkins to determine that enlightenment is an emotion.
[19:30] SPEAKER_00: His map of consciousness explains how emotions oscillate at different frequencies, with enlightenment being the fastest moving emotion of them all.
[19:39] SPEAKER_00: That is how I learned that enlightenment is an emotion in every human's natural emotional range.
[19:46] SPEAKER_00: Once I saw it as a normal process for every human being, it was much easier for me to accept that I had experienced it myself.
[19:54] SPEAKER_00: Little did I know at the time, but it was going to keep happening to me.
[19:59] SPEAKER_00: I was so shocked by it happening once that I didn't think about it happening again.
[20:04] SPEAKER_00: However, it did over and over ever since.
[20:08] SPEAKER_00: Just like how I feel angry, happy, fearful, or compassionate frequently, ultimately showing me enlightenment is just like every other emotion I feel regularly.
[20:20] SPEAKER_00: Let me take a second to differentiate how men and women may experience enlightenment before I get back to my story.
[20:28] SPEAKER_00: Women's nervous systems are far more robust than men's nervous systems, as women are physiologically designed to process deep emotions.
[20:37] SPEAKER_00: That is why I stayed in the frequency of enlightenment for three days, where stories of male enlightenment experience often describe several hours, not days.
[20:48] SPEAKER_00: One is not right and one is not wrong.
[20:51] SPEAKER_00: Men and women experience emotions for different lengths of time due to the inherent nature of their nervous systems.
[20:58] SPEAKER_00: Men's nervous systems generally aren't capable of holding on to intense emotion for three days as they are designed to let go of their emotions quickly in order to maintain their logical left brain functions, where women are the opposite.
[21:14] SPEAKER_00: I hope that helps everyone understand how they might experience enlightenment as a man or a woman.
[21:21] SPEAKER_00: Now let's get back to my story.
[21:22] SPEAKER_00: To teach my oldest daughter what enlightenment is, first I explained how and why it is an emotion based on the work of Dr.
[21:30] SPEAKER_00: David R.
[21:31] SPEAKER_00: Hawkins and his map of consciousness.
[21:34] SPEAKER_00: Then I found a famous Carl Jung quote: one does not become enlightened by imagining beings of light, but by making their darkness conscious.
[21:44] SPEAKER_00: That was the final piece of evidence I needed to explain my experience to my oldest daughter, settling it once and for all that I had experienced enlightenment.
[21:55] SPEAKER_00: She's a tough cookie, just like Lilith.
[22:00] SPEAKER_00: After my first enlightenment experience in 2024, I started experiencing enlightenment more and more frequently that year, with some experiences being mild and some more intense.
[22:10] SPEAKER_00: My next most powerful enlightenment experience happened in September of 2025, right after I accepted that I'm the reincarnation of Mary Magdalene.
[22:21] SPEAKER_00: Earlier that month, I had been doing a lot of research on Mary Magdalene, prophecies about the return of the Messiah, and gospels found in Egypt over the last 150 years.
[22:32] SPEAKER_00: I learned that there were many prophecies that stated the return of the Messiah, what happened during the third week of September 2025, which was the week of the Jewish New Year representing divine feminine time.
[22:45] SPEAKER_00: The third week of September 25 begins an entire period defined by Teshuva, meaning return, repentance, introspection, deep listening, and quiet contemplation.
[22:57] SPEAKER_00: Arch typole, the act of self-reflection, turning inward and becoming a vessel to receive judgment or grace is entirely governed by the feminine principle of spiritual receptivity.
[23:10] SPEAKER_00: According to Jewish mysticism, the creation of the world, and specifically the creation of Eve, is celebrated on the Jewish New Year.
[23:20] SPEAKER_00: The spiritual work of this holiday is to awaken the Mahot, which activates the divine feminine representing the lowest sphere on the tree of life.
[23:30] SPEAKER_00: The metaphysics of the holiday point to an arousal from below, the earth or bride rising to meet the divine, rather than a masculine figure descending from above, which is so typical in Judeo-Christian prophecies.
[23:43] SPEAKER_00: In Jewish mysticism known as Kabbalah, the Messianic Age is not achieved until the divine feminine is pulled out of exile and reunited with the divine masculine.
[23:53] SPEAKER_00: Therefore, any true messianic return aligned with the reflective Jewish high holidays cannot be a purely patriarchal event.
[24:01] SPEAKER_00: It demands a manifestation of the divine feminine, a messianic energy that is receptive, nurturing, inward-facing, and healing, rather than purely masculine and conquest driven.
[24:14] SPEAKER_00: In my research, I never found anything about the Messiah being a woman.
[24:18] SPEAKER_00: I always saw texts discussing the messiah being a man.
[24:22] SPEAKER_00: While popular messianic prophecies missed this nuance by viewing the 2025 alignments through a traditional masculine lens, an esoteric reading of those exact dates strongly validates my insight.
[24:35] SPEAKER_00: Any messiah arriving during the Jewish High Holidays must embody the reflective internal power of the divine feminine.
[24:45] SPEAKER_00: That is exactly what happened to me during the week of the Jewish New Year in 2025.
[24:51] SPEAKER_00: I didn't know much about the Jewish High Holidays, as my Israeli ex-husband is secular.
[24:57] SPEAKER_00: We never celebrated them.
[24:59] SPEAKER_00: Here is what I have learned on my own.
[25:01] SPEAKER_00: The Jewish New Year started Monday, September 22nd, 2025, at sunset and ended that Wednesday at sunset.
[25:09] SPEAKER_00: On the second day of the Jewish New Year, synagogues worldwide read a specific prophetic text, Jeremiah 31, 1 through 20, which explicitly introduces the ultimate futuristic concept of the divine covenant written on our hearts, bypassing the need for external religious institutions, because the cosmic rhythm is already the blueprint of our souls.
[25:34] SPEAKER_00: When we trust ourselves, our souls, we naturally align with the cosmic rhythm.
[25:39] SPEAKER_00: Jeremiah 31 is also the specific scriptural home of Rachel, weeping for her children and refusing to be comforted.
[25:47] SPEAKER_00: In Jewish mysticism, Rachel is not just a historical matriarch.
[25:52] SPEAKER_00: She is the literal face of the divine feminine, the weeping, exile divine feminine who descends into the lower realms of pain to suffer alongside her children and lead them back to wholeness.
[26:03] SPEAKER_00: My youngest daughter's middle name is Rachel, named after her maternal grandmother's older sister who passed away right before she was born in 2002.
[26:14] SPEAKER_00: Just like Persephone, Rachel refuses to stay isolated in a comfortable heavenly paradise.
[26:21] SPEAKER_00: She chooses to descend into the lowest depths of human pain to sit with her children in their suffering and guide them back into the light.
[26:30] SPEAKER_00: My daughter, Orley, has a gift for sitting with people in their emotional pain, helping them self-reflect in their darkness, their underworld.
[26:40] SPEAKER_00: Sophia and Rachel represent two parts of the tree of life.
[26:44] SPEAKER_00: Sophia is the high mother, where Rachel is the earthly bride, the container that receives the light from above.
[26:51] SPEAKER_00: We work in tandem.
[26:52] SPEAKER_00: Also, on the second night of the Jewish New Year, it is a strict mystical requirement to place a new fruit on the table and say a blessing over it.
[27:02] SPEAKER_00: This acts as a physical talisman to ground a completely new spiritual insight that has just dropped into a person's awareness.
[27:12] SPEAKER_00: My soul did that for me early on the second morning of the Jewish New Year, just past midnight on September 24th, 2025.
[27:21] SPEAKER_00: I woke up at 1 a.m.
[27:23] SPEAKER_00: My intuition immediately guided me to accept my soul's true name, Sophia.
[27:28] SPEAKER_00: Then within one minute, a weather anomaly hit.
[27:31] SPEAKER_00: A huge thunder and lightning storm came for 15 minutes with heavy rain.
[27:36] SPEAKER_00: Google just gave me the following information about that event.
[27:39] SPEAKER_00: It stated, weather logs and the National Weather Service confirmed that a sudden, uncharacteristic, cutoff low pressure system stalled off the Southern California coast, sending over 2,600 lightning strikes directly across the Ventura shoreline and coastal waters.
[28:01] SPEAKER_00: I lived in Ventura from 2005 until earlier this year in 2026 in May.
[28:07] SPEAKER_00: I finally sold my condo.
[28:08] SPEAKER_00: So that's where I was living a year ago in September of 2025.
[28:12] SPEAKER_00: For the Mediterranean climate like Ventura's, where summer and early autumn thunderstorms are exceptionally rare, a localized, explosive, 15-minute window of intense thunder and lightning is a statistical anomaly.
[28:27] SPEAKER_00: The only other time a weather event like that happened in Ventura was in October 2021.
[28:33] SPEAKER_00: Let's take a deeper dive into this synchronicity between weather, the Jewish New Year, and my soul's awakening.
[28:40] SPEAKER_00: In our typal psychology, lightning is the universal symbol of sudden illumination, the shattering of the ego, and direct revelation from the higher self.
[28:52] SPEAKER_00: It is the physical manifestation of the flash of insight.
[28:56] SPEAKER_00: Remember earlier when we discussed the first line of the Lord's Prayer using the Aramaic translation?
[29:03] SPEAKER_00: O birther, father-mother of the cosmos.
[29:05] SPEAKER_00: It is a translation of Aramaic pronounced as Abun di Bawashmaya.
[29:11] SPEAKER_00: Abwun is a deliberate blending of two polarities.
[29:14] SPEAKER_00: Ab is the divine masculine seed, the absolute point of origin or father.
[29:19] SPEAKER_00: Woon is the divine feminine womb, the nurturing hold or mother.
[29:24] SPEAKER_00: This marriage perfectly captures the definition of abwum, the masculine spark, ab, striking the material fluid womb of the waters, wound.
[29:34] SPEAKER_00: The storm was a literal physical dramatization of birthing source of the cosmos, taking place right outside my window with lightning hitting the Pacific Ocean.
[29:45] SPEAKER_00: The Kabbalah teaches that this Jewish holiday is designed to awaken the divine feminine so she can rise to meet her masculine counterpart where water meets lightning.
[29:56] SPEAKER_00: That Friday, September 26, 2025, my intuition guided me to summarize my healing wisdom into my free ebook and make a YouTube video about it.
[30:07] SPEAKER_00: I wrote my six divine feminine self-love strategies, which teach people how to self-reflect.
[30:14] SPEAKER_00: Then the next day I had a massive enlightenment experience.
[30:19] SPEAKER_00: Dr.
[30:19] SPEAKER_00: Hawkins taught me that when one experiences enlightenment, the person's soul opens attractor energy cells so as to share the wisdom gained naturally with all other souls through a process called morphic resonance.
[30:34] SPEAKER_00: To summarize this process, when I unveil wisdom or knowledge from inside my own soul, my soul naturally communicates it to all other souls, providing them with an opportunity to expand their consciousness, their emotional range as well.
[30:50] SPEAKER_00: This is how all souls naturally help each other.
[30:53] SPEAKER_00: I shared my self-love strategies this way at the tail end of this enlightenment experience.
[30:58] SPEAKER_00: On Sunday, September 28th, 2025, my intuition guided me to research the Sabbath after the Jewish New Year.
[31:07] SPEAKER_00: It is called Shabbat Shuva or Sabbath of Return.
[31:11] SPEAKER_00: It is the biggest day of self-reflection in the Jewish calendar.
[31:15] SPEAKER_00: Little did I know two days prior that I was writing down all of my wisdom about self-reflection on the weekend, explicitly designed for self-reflection in the Jewish calendar.
[31:27] SPEAKER_00: I didn't know.
[31:28] SPEAKER_00: While doing that research, I also located the prophecy in Jeremiah 31, 33, which discusses a time when external institutional religions will become obsolete in lieu of the cosmic rhythm already written into the blueprint of our souls.
[31:45] SPEAKER_00: That Sunday is when I decided to call my experience, the second coming, a covenant written on our hearts.
[31:53] SPEAKER_00: At the time, I had no idea that Jeremiah 31, 1 through 20 was also part of the Jewish New Year that had only passed a few days prior.
[32:02] SPEAKER_00: The wisdom in Jeremiah 31, 33 aligns with Aramaic translations of the Bible.
[32:08] SPEAKER_00: Heaven means the realm of light, breath, presence, and connection.
[32:12] SPEAKER_00: The kingdom of God means a living reign, an inner I can, and a movement toward wholeness.
[32:19] SPEAKER_00: This perspective aligns with Carl Jung's teachings.
[32:22] SPEAKER_00: He said wholeness is not achieved by cutting off a portion of one's being, but by the integration of the contraries.
[32:29] SPEAKER_00: The contraries are masculine and feminine.
[32:32] SPEAKER_00: When one is exalted and one is repressed, we are not whole.
[32:36] SPEAKER_00: We are out of alignment, creating the patriarchy.
[32:40] SPEAKER_00: Institutionalized Christianity translated the gospels to meet their need to align with the rise of the patriarchal nation state in Europe 1600 years ago, repressing the feminine to establish dominance and control over the populace.
[32:55] SPEAKER_00: During my first enlightenment experience, I saw that creation was ascribed to a masculine God, bringing the world out of balance.
[33:05] SPEAKER_00: It is time to restore that balance, but first I had to create balance inside of my own soul before I could share that energetic balance with others.
[33:15] SPEAKER_00: Changing the world is an inside job that starts by individuals creating balance and wholeness within their own consciousness, their very own soul.
[33:25] SPEAKER_00: Our souls are energy bodies, and energy naturally aligns with the fastest moving energy.
[33:30] SPEAKER_00: Enlightenment is the fastest moving emotion a soul emits.
[33:33] SPEAKER_00: That is why changing the world is an inside job.
[33:36] SPEAKER_00: It starts within, which is what Jesus, Mary Magdalene, and the apostles were really teaching.
[33:42] SPEAKER_00: When we look at the Aramaic translation of the Lord's Prayer, we find balance between the masculine and feminine, as well as encouragement to look within, insight, a word excluded from the modern translation of the Lord's Prayer.
[33:57] SPEAKER_00: First, I will read the modern translation of this prayer prior to reading the Aramaic translation so you can see the difference.
[34:04] SPEAKER_00: Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
[34:12] SPEAKER_00: Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, for thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever.
[34:27] SPEAKER_00: Amen.
[34:28] SPEAKER_00: Now I will read the Aramaic translation.
[34:31] SPEAKER_00: O birther, Father, Mother of the Cosmos, you create all that moves in light.
[34:37] SPEAKER_00: Focus your light within us, make it useful, as the rays of a beacon show the way.
[34:42] SPEAKER_00: Create your reign of unity now through our fiery hearts and willing hands.
[34:47] SPEAKER_00: Your one desire then acts with ours, as in all light, so in all forms.
[34:53] SPEAKER_00: Grant what we need each day in bread and insight, substance for the call of growing life.
[34:58] SPEAKER_00: Lose the cords of mistakes binding us as we release the strands we hold of others' guilt.
[35:05] SPEAKER_00: Don't let surface things delude us, but free us from what holds us back.
[35:09] SPEAKER_00: From you is born all ruling will, the power and the life to do.
[35:13] SPEAKER_00: The song that beautifies all.
[35:15] SPEAKER_00: From age to age it renews.
[35:17] SPEAKER_00: Truly, the power to these statements.
[35:19] SPEAKER_00: May they be the source from which all my actions grow.
[35:23] SPEAKER_00: Sealed in trust and faith.
[35:25] SPEAKER_00: Amen.
[35:30] SPEAKER_00: I will put a copy of these two translations below in the description so you can look at them over in more detail.
[35:36] SPEAKER_00: One difference really stands out to me is between give us this day our daily bread from the modern translation, where the Aramaic translation says, grant what we need each day in bread and insight, sustenance for the call of growing life.
[35:52] SPEAKER_00: Bread meets the physical needs of life, where insight meets the emotional needs of life, creating wholeness for the individual and representing balance between the masculine and the feminine.
[36:02] SPEAKER_00: This type of balance is not found in the modern translation.
[36:06] SPEAKER_00: Here is another verse that shows the difference between the two translations.
[36:10] SPEAKER_00: The modern version says, and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
[36:15] SPEAKER_00: And the Aramaic translation says, Don't let surface things delude us, but free us from what holds us back.
[36:22] SPEAKER_00: There is no mention of evil in the Aramaic translation, but the teaching of evil is so pervasive in institutionalized Christianity, justifying the killing of heretics, Christian punishment, and beyond.
[36:35] SPEAKER_00: The modern translation is about dominance and control, where the Aramaic translation is about aligning with the natural cosmic rhythm created by the mother-father of the cosmos.
[36:46] SPEAKER_00: Wholeness and balance.
[36:48] SPEAKER_00: So if we want to eradicate the patriarchy, we have to start with our view of God or the cosmos.
[36:54] SPEAKER_00: That is what my first enlightenment experience taught me.
[36:58] SPEAKER_00: As the reincarnation of Mary Magdalene, I am here to help everyone expand their emotional range to include enlightenment, which is explicitly not a goal of institutionalized Christianity.
[37:11] SPEAKER_00: Emotions are feminine, so expanding one's emotional range is a feminine teaching.
[37:17] SPEAKER_00: In true enlightenment, salvation is an inside job.
[37:20] SPEAKER_00: A person achieves direct experiential knowledge of the divine through enlightenment within their own soul through a process of expanding their emotional range to include enlightenment.
[37:31] SPEAKER_00: I had to learn that I am the only one who can access the divinity inside of my very own soul by learning how to surf the waves of life.
[37:40] SPEAKER_00: This approach dismantles institutionalized religion.
[37:44] SPEAKER_00: If every individual can access the divine directly within themselves through enlightenment, they no longer need an external institution to save them.
[37:53] SPEAKER_00: Institutional Christianity established its immense geopolitical power by teaching that salvation can only be achieved through the church, its sacraments, and its ordained priesthood, by making themselves the mandatory middlemen between humanity and the divine.
[38:11] SPEAKER_00: The institutional nation states maintain total spiritual and social control over the populace.
[38:18] SPEAKER_00: The solution is written inside of the problem in Jeremiah 31, 33.
[38:23] SPEAKER_00: Now is the time for learning how to access the divinity inside of your own soul, all on your own without any middlemen.
[38:31] SPEAKER_00: That is why I am here to share my teachings called the six divine feminine self-love strategies to help everyone expand their emotional range to include enlightenment.
[38:41] SPEAKER_00: Repressing the feminine equals repressing enlightenment on both an individual and societal level.
[38:47] SPEAKER_00: I experience enlightenment by learning how to surf the waves of life, meaning process my emotional pain.
[38:53] SPEAKER_00: I had to learn that life is like jumping on a trampoline per the laws of physics.
[38:58] SPEAKER_00: I had to explore my fear, guilt, and shame in order to propel me high up into love, compassion, and enlightenment.
[39:06] SPEAKER_00: Carl Jung mirrors this sentiment when he wrote, No tree, it is said, can grow to heaven unless its roots reach down to hell.
[39:15] SPEAKER_00: My deepest hell was my suicide attempt, and my highest heaven are my enlightenment experiences.
[39:21] SPEAKER_00: Let me put it another way.
[39:22] SPEAKER_00: If I want Mount Everestai's wisdom, I had to take on Mount Everestai's wounds first.
[39:30] SPEAKER_00: Learning to surf the waves of life means waves keep coming.
[39:35] SPEAKER_00: Enlightenment is not a destination one reaches and stays in as static energy is dead energy.
[39:42] SPEAKER_00: To maintain moving energy, I still dive into my fear, guilt, and shame weekly.
[39:48] SPEAKER_00: I know that I gain momentum exponentially on the downhill, catapulting me to my next weekly enlightenment experience.
[39:55] SPEAKER_00: Learning to surf the ways of life doesn't mean you stay on the top of the wave.
[40:01] SPEAKER_00: That reality doesn't exist.
[40:04] SPEAKER_00: To see for yourself, just go to the beach.
[40:06] SPEAKER_00: I have listed several free resources linked in the description of this episode to help everyone transform their emotional wounds into personal wisdom with my DIY strategies.
[40:17] SPEAKER_00: I am not here to have personal clients.
[40:19] SPEAKER_00: I am here to do the feminine energetic work globally and share my wisdom with all people who feel drawn to it.
[40:29] SPEAKER_00: I contribute to the collective with my weekly enlightenment experiences, this podcast, my YouTube channel, and my book, My Inner Heroine Exploring Feminine Pain, as well as my free resources linked below.
[40:42] SPEAKER_00: Please reach out with questions via my personal website at carryblazer.com, also linked below.
[40:49] SPEAKER_00: I also have some exciting news to share.
[40:51] SPEAKER_00: Evergreen Podcast Network invited me to join them less than 30 days after the launch of my podcast.
[40:57] SPEAKER_00: I am extremely grateful for their invite and will share more about my collaboration with them going forward.
[41:03] SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for opening your heart to this soul-to-soul transmission.
[41:08] SPEAKER_00: If this message resonated with you, please make sure to hit that subscribe button, drop a review, and share this episode with someone who is ready to remember the divine power they hold within.
[41:19] SPEAKER_00: Make sure your notifications are on, because next time in episode three, we will discuss my relationship with my two amazing daughters.
[41:27] SPEAKER_00: My oldest is Yel, and my intuition told me her soul's name is Lilith.
[41:32] SPEAKER_00: My youngest is Orley Rachel, and my intuition told me her soul's name is Persephone.
[41:39] SPEAKER_00: Three is the number of completion, and we are a complete set for global success.
[41:44] SPEAKER_00: I would never have been successful at my spiritual journey without them.
[41:48] SPEAKER_00: They are instrumental to my success, which is why I will honor them as women of valor as well.
[41:54] SPEAKER_00: In the meantime, keep trusting your internal authority, keep surfing the waves of life, and remember your boundaries are sacred, and heaven is an inside job.
[42:05] SPEAKER_00: I'm Carrie Mae Blazer, the Red Pill Shaman, and I will see you next time in episode three of season two.

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