# Fibber McGee and Molly - "Sued for Alienating Flash's Affections" (Old Time Radio, 1954)

An episode of [Fibber McGee and Molly | Old Time Radio](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1858238532), 26 Sep 2026, 15 min.

Audio: https://dts.podtrac.com/redirect.mp3/api.spreaker.com/download/episode/75379785/86c237169fc2cfb9_mastered.mp3

Fibber McGee and Molly presents “Sued for Alienating Flash’s Affections,” originally broadcast on NBC on May 14, 1954. Episode 900 finds Jim and Marian Jordan as Fibber and Molly McGee in another brief visit to Wistful Vista. Fibber faces an especially unusual legal complaint involving Flash, the McGees’ dog, when he is accused of alienating the animal’s affections. Written by Phil Leslie and Len Levinson and directed by Max Hutto, this installment is part of a short Flash-centered storyline. Fibber McGee and Molly presents the original broadcast with a newly produced contextual introduction, a short closing announcement, and gently cleaned and mastered audio for a more consistent listening experience. Chapters: 00:00 Victor Sterling Introduction 00:48 Original Broadcast 14:41 Closing Support Old Time Retro Radio at https://www.patreon.com/oldtimeretroradio

## Transcript

[0:00] Speaker 1: Phil Leslie and Len Levinson wrote this visit to Wistful
[0:03] Speaker 1: Vista with Max Hutto directing. On May 14th, 1954, NBC
[0:09] Speaker 1: presented episode number 900 of Fibber McGee and Molly, with
[0:13] Speaker 1: Jim Jordan as Fibber, Marion Jordan as Molly, and John
[0:17] Speaker 1: Wald announcing. The episode is Sued for Alienating Flash's Affections.
[0:23] Speaker 1: Fibber faces an unusual legal complaint involving Flash, the McGee's dog,
[0:28] Speaker 1: accused of alienating the animal's affections. With Plymouth as sponsor,
[0:33] Speaker 1: this 15-minute weekday program continues a short sequence involving Flash
[0:38] Speaker 1: and a later day in court. Now, back to the
[0:42] Speaker 1: golden age of radio. Follow Fibber McGee and Molly for
[0:46] Speaker 1: more classic broadcasts.
[0:51] Speaker 2: The Fibber McGee and Molly Show. NBC and Plymouth Cars
[1:03] Speaker 2: present Fibber, McKee, and Molly Transcribed. The show is written
[1:06] Speaker 2: by Phil Leslie and Len Levinson and directed by Max Hutto.
[1:16] Speaker 2: We'll join Fibber and Molly in just a moment. If
[1:19] Speaker 2: you had about $ 5, 000 saved up, what would you do
[1:22] Speaker 2: with it?
[1:23] Speaker 3: Pay off the mortgage?
[1:24] Speaker 4: Buy a new car?
[1:25] Speaker 2: Maybe take a trip to Europe? All wonderful plans, but
[1:29] Speaker 2: first you need the cash. And you can have it
[1:32] Speaker 2: sooner than you think by investing in United States Savings Bonds.
[1:36] Speaker 2: Do it the easy, automatic way by joining the payroll
[1:38] Speaker 2: savings plan where you work. You decide how much you
[1:41] Speaker 2: want to save, and your employer will set it aside
[1:43] Speaker 2: for you before you draw your pay.
[1:45] Speaker 3: That way you.
[1:46] Speaker 2: Won't even miss the money. By saving only $ 8. 80 a week,
[1:48] Speaker 2: you'll have $ 5, 000 in less.
[1:49] Speaker 1: Than 10 years.
[1:53] Speaker 2: Because savings bonds pay you back $ 4 for every $ 3
[1:56] Speaker 2: you invest, and even more if you hold them longer. Remember,
[1:59] Speaker 2: you'll have the money you want tomorrow if you invest
[2:01] Speaker 2: in United States savings bonds today. And you'll also have
[2:04] Speaker 2: the security of a safer, stronger America. That's what your
[2:08] Speaker 2: savings bonds do. They help to keep our American economy strong.
[2:12] Speaker 2: They help to make this a better country for you
[2:14] Speaker 2: and your children.
[2:25] Speaker 3: Mr.
[2:25] Speaker 2: McGee of 79 Whistler Vista is in legal difficulty. He's
[2:29] Speaker 2: been summoned to appear in municipal court on Monday to
[2:32] Speaker 2: answer a charge of alienating the affections of a dog.
[2:36] Speaker 2: Here he is now trying to get some advice on
[2:38] Speaker 2: the phone.
[2:39] Speaker 5: Well, then the dog followed me home a second time, counselor,
[2:42] Speaker 5: and the owner had to drag him out of here,
[2:43] Speaker 5: and now he's suing me for.
[2:44] Speaker 4: What's that, huh?
[2:46] Speaker 3: Oh.
[2:48] Speaker 4: Okay, bye.
[2:50] Speaker 6: He wouldn't take it either, huh?
[2:52] Speaker 2: Too busy.
[2:54] Speaker 6: This whole thing is just ridiculous, McGee. Alienating the affections
[2:57] Speaker 6: of a dog, if that isn't the silliest thing.
[2:59] Speaker 5: Right, and I just made up my mind on one thing.
[3:01] Speaker 5: I'm going to call no more lawyers. I'm going to
[3:04] Speaker 5: be my own lawyer on this case.
[3:05] Speaker 6: That's what I say. It gets sillier by the minute.
[3:08] Speaker 5: Gee whiz, I'm no dunce when it comes to law,
[3:10] Speaker 5: you know. I've been in court before.
[3:12] Speaker 6: Yes, too often.
[3:14] Speaker 5: I'll show that guy, Corner, that he's not fooling with
[3:16] Speaker 5: any amateur. He ain't got a leg to stand on,
[3:18] Speaker 5: and I'm just the guy that can kick it out
[3:20] Speaker 5: from under him, too.
[3:21] Speaker 4: Come in. Gentlemen of the jury, I'll say.
[3:24] Speaker 3: Who are you going to say that to?
[3:26] Speaker 2: Hiya, Molly.
[3:26] Speaker 6: Hello, Dr. Gamble.
[3:28] Speaker 4: I'm going to say it to the jury. Who else?
[3:29] Speaker 4: You won't have a jury on a case like this. Okay,
[3:32] Speaker 4: so I'll say it to the judge.
[3:33] Speaker 6: You're going to say gentlemen of the jury to the judge?
[3:35] Speaker 6: Won't that sound kind of silly?
[3:37] Speaker 2: No silly in the rest of this crazy case, Molly.
[3:41] Speaker 2: How could this thing happen anyhow, McGee? How could a
[3:44] Speaker 2: perfectly strange dog just walk up to you and fall
[3:46] Speaker 2: in love with you at first sight?
[3:49] Speaker 4: Oh, I don't know. Ask Molly. She done the same
[3:51] Speaker 4: thing in 1918. Come to.
[3:54] Speaker 6: Think of it, I did as that, Doctor.
[3:56] Speaker 3: Why? Well.
[3:58] Speaker 6: He was gentle and obedient.
[3:59] Speaker 3: Oh.
[4:00] Speaker 6: He was always at my heel.
[4:02] Speaker 4: Oh, sure.
[4:03] Speaker 6: And he used to run and fetch sticks for me
[4:05] Speaker 6: after school. With candy apples on them.
[4:09] Speaker 5: Seriously, Doc, you were here yesterday. You saw how that
[4:11] Speaker 5: pudding-headed pooch followed me around all day.
[4:13] Speaker 4: You saw me trying to get rid of him. Yes,
[4:15] Speaker 4: I saw it, and I'll never forget it.
[4:17] Speaker 2: The picture I have in my mind of that misshapen
[4:19] Speaker 2: mountain of dog meat kissing you.
[4:21] Speaker 4: Goodbye while Mr.
[4:22] Speaker 2: Corner tried to drag him away and the policeman tried
[4:25] Speaker 2: to hand you the summons is a.
[4:27] Speaker 4: Picture I'd love to have framed.
[4:30] Speaker 5: That's exactly what that guy Corner's trying to do to me,
[4:32] Speaker 5: frame me. And he's not going to get away with it, too, either.
[4:35] Speaker 5: I'm going to be my own lawyer on this thing.
[4:36] Speaker 2: Oh, I guess.
[4:37] Speaker 4: And I wouldn't miss this for the world.
[4:39] Speaker 6: I wish we could miss it.
[4:40] Speaker 4: I can just see the scene now.
[4:42] Speaker 6: The crowded courtroom.
[4:43] Speaker 2: The judge on the bench. The dog on the witness stand.
[4:45] Speaker 4: The perspiration on McGee. It's hot in the courtroom. This
[4:48] Speaker 4: case looks bad. McGee throws himself on the mercy of
[4:51] Speaker 4: the court.
[4:52] Speaker 2: The dog throws himself on McGee. The owner throws himself
[4:54] Speaker 2: on the dog. And the judge throws them all in
[4:56] Speaker 2: the calaboo.
[4:57] Speaker 4: Oh, it should be fun. I'll see you in court, Gladstone.
[5:04] Speaker 6: Goodbye, Molly.
[5:04] Speaker 7: Bye.
[5:06] Speaker 5: Who's he calling a Gladstone, the big bag? I wonder
[5:10] Speaker 5: if that guy Corner would listen to reason and call
[5:12] Speaker 5: this whole thing off.
[5:12] Speaker 4: Molly, you think he would?
[5:13] Speaker 6: Well, it certainly won't hurt to try.
[5:15] Speaker 4: No.
[5:15] Speaker 6: Why don't you call him up and explain that you
[5:16] Speaker 6: don't want any part of his dog and you never did?
[5:19] Speaker 2: It's the truth.
[5:20] Speaker 4: I don't know. I just hate to talk to the guy.
[5:22] Speaker 1: Go on.
[5:22] Speaker 4: Go on.
[5:23] Speaker 3: Call him.
[5:24] Speaker 6: He's probably cooled off by now and realizes he was
[5:26] Speaker 6: in the wrong. Talk to him nice. 79 Whistle Vista,
[5:32] Speaker 6: Molly McGee speaking.
[5:34] Speaker 2: Yes, he is.
[5:35] Speaker 6: You, dearie. It's the Gazette calling.
[5:38] Speaker 2: Thanks.
[5:38] Speaker 8: Hello?
[5:39] Speaker 3: Hello? Yeah.
[5:42] Speaker 4: Oh, a reporter, huh? Well, anything I can do for
[5:44] Speaker 4: the gentlemen of the press, I'm always... Huh?
[5:49] Speaker 5: Where did you get that information, bud? Well, it's a lie,
[5:52] Speaker 5: every bit of it.
[5:53] Speaker 4: I never lured that big mangy slob of a dumb
[5:56] Speaker 4: beast away from any place.
[5:57] Speaker 6: Oh, my.
[5:58] Speaker 5: That slab-sided, mutton-headed, peanut-brained monster is so stupid he don't
[6:01] Speaker 5: know where his home is, that's all.
[6:03] Speaker 4: Yes, you can quote me. No, I wouldn't take custody of.
[6:06] Speaker 5: That moron Mongrel if Corner gave me the whole store
[6:08] Speaker 5: as alimony.
[6:09] Speaker 6: What?
[6:10] Speaker 3: No, I won't.
[6:11] Speaker 4: Wise guy.
[6:12] Speaker 6: What'd he say?
[6:13] Speaker 5: Seems to think there's something very funny about me being
[6:16] Speaker 5: sued for alienation of a thug's affections. Asked me how
[6:18] Speaker 5: it feels to be called a love pirate. Wanted me
[6:21] Speaker 5: to come down and have a picture took.
[6:22] Speaker 3: You refused?
[6:23] Speaker 4: I'll say I refused.
[6:24] Speaker 5: I'm not going to pose with no 150 pounds of
[6:27] Speaker 5: dog in my lap.
[6:28] Speaker 4: Doggone it, there must be something I can do.
[6:40] Speaker 2: Back to Whistle Vista in a minute.
[6:44] Speaker 3: Part by part, only Plymouth dares to compare.
[6:49] Speaker 2: Plymouth engineers have taken apart the 1954 Plymouth and current
[6:52] Speaker 2: models of the other two best-known cars in the lowest-priced field.
[6:55] Speaker 2: They've compared the three part by part. Chassis, body, under
[6:59] Speaker 2: the hood, the whole car. Get the full story in
[7:01] Speaker 2: the big eight-page booklet. Yours free at your Plymouth dealer.
[7:04] Speaker 2: You'll find the features only Plymouth offers. That's just one example.
[7:08] Speaker 3: Check under the hood.
[7:09] Speaker 2: Plymouth pops the other two in generators, spark plugs, air cleaner,
[7:12] Speaker 2: cooling fans. Get this comparison booklet free at your Plymouth dealer.
[7:16] Speaker 2: Learn why Plymouth is America's best buy low-priced car. And
[7:19] Speaker 2: remember this figure, $ 1, 582. That's the factory retail price of
[7:24] Speaker 2: the Plymouth six-passenger Plaza Club sedan. That's at Factory Detroit, Michigan.
[7:28] Speaker 2: All taxes, transportation, delivery charges, license, and optional equipment are extra.
[7:32] Speaker 3: Boom. Part by part, only Plymouth dares to compare.
[7:48] Speaker 5: When you hear this, Molly, Wimp here, our good friend
[7:51] Speaker 5: Wallace Wimple, he knows Fudd Sutton personally.
[7:54] Speaker 4: Well, don't you get it, kiddo? Fudd Sutton is a
[7:56] Speaker 4: cousin of Albie Ross. Albie's wife's father, you see, is
[8:00] Speaker 4: Horace Collier. You still don't get it, huh?
[8:03] Speaker 6: If you boys will excuse me, I'm baking a cake.
[8:05] Speaker 4: Well, don't go.
[8:06] Speaker 5: This is important about my trial Monday.
[8:08] Speaker 4: So is the cake.
[8:09] Speaker 6: It's got a file in each layer.
[8:10] Speaker 5: Yeah, but Horace Collier has the parking lot next to
[8:13] Speaker 5: Corner's appliance store, and Wimp is going to talk to
[8:15] Speaker 5: Fred Sutton, who will contact Albie.
[8:16] Speaker 4: Ross, who will go see Mr.
[8:18] Speaker 5: Collier and ask him to tell Corner to call off
[8:20] Speaker 5: this whole mess.
[8:21] Speaker 6: Why don't you just telephone Corner yourself?
[8:23] Speaker 4: Oh, Molly, you can't handle a thing like this like that.
[8:26] Speaker 4: You've got to do it smart. You've got to finesse around,
[8:28] Speaker 4: don't you, Wimp?
[8:30] Speaker 6: Oh, yes.
[8:31] Speaker 3: Use diplomacy.
[8:32] Speaker 4: Yeah, diplomacy. You got a diploma with?
[8:34] Speaker 9: Well, not with me, Mr.
[8:35] Speaker 8: McGee.
[8:36] Speaker 9: It's in my trunk.
[8:37] Speaker 3: Oh.
[8:37] Speaker 9: It's from Adding Machine School.
[8:39] Speaker 3: Oh?
[8:40] Speaker 6: You graduated from an Adding Machine School, huh?
[8:42] Speaker 9: With honors, Mrs.
[8:44] Speaker 3: McGee. Wow.
[8:44] Speaker 9: My diploma says right across the top in gold letters,
[8:47] Speaker 9: Wallace Wimple, Ph.D.
[8:50] Speaker 4: Ph.D.? Boy.
[8:52] Speaker 2: Yes.
[8:53] Speaker 9: I always kept forgetting what to do after I put
[8:55] Speaker 9: the numbers in the adding machine. So the principal put
[8:57] Speaker 9: a Ph.D. on my diploma to remind me. Pull handles down.
[9:02] Speaker 3: Oh. Oh.
[9:05] Speaker 4: Well, come on, Wimp. We'd better get the show on
[9:06] Speaker 4: the road, boy.
[9:07] Speaker 2: Yes.
[9:07] Speaker 9: I'll run right downtown and see Fred Sutton.
[9:10] Speaker 3: Don't go away.
[9:11] Speaker 4: I'll phone you.
[9:11] Speaker 2: Bye, Mrs.
[9:12] Speaker 3: McGee.
[9:13] Speaker 6: Goodbye.
[9:13] Speaker 4: Goodbye. Ah, there's a nice little guy, Molly. Got a
[9:17] Speaker 4: heart as big as all outdoors.
[9:19] Speaker 6: Yes, and habits to match.
[9:21] Speaker 4: What do you mean?
[9:21] Speaker 6: He left the front door open. Close it, will you, McGee?
[9:24] Speaker 2: Sure.
[9:25] Speaker 4: Boy, oh boy, I hope this thing works out the way.
[9:27] Speaker 2: Hi, Mr. McGee.
[9:28] Speaker 8: Hi. It's me, Teeny.
[9:30] Speaker 4: Oh, hello there, Teeny. Come on in. What can I
[9:32] Speaker 4: do for you, sis?
[9:35] Speaker 6: Well, I brought you something, mister.
[9:36] Speaker 3: Oh?
[9:37] Speaker 6: Look, I got a present for you, I bet you.
[9:39] Speaker 4: You mean a present?
[9:40] Speaker 3: Sure.
[9:41] Speaker 6: It's a present of a president, see?
[9:44] Speaker 4: Oh, what do you know? George Washington's picture on a calendar.
[9:48] Speaker 4: That's for me, sis?
[9:49] Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
[9:50] Speaker 6: For when you go to jail.
[9:51] Speaker 3: Oh.
[9:52] Speaker 4: Now, wait a minute. Who around here says I'm going
[9:54] Speaker 4: to go to jail?
[9:55] Speaker 6: Who around here doesn't?
[9:58] Speaker 4: You mean to say that the neighbors are talking? What
[10:00] Speaker 4: are they talking about?
[10:01] Speaker 6: About nothing else. Gee, you shouldn't have done it, mister.
[10:06] Speaker 6: You shouldn't have given that dog your afflictions.
[10:09] Speaker 4: It was my affections. And I gave him very little
[10:12] Speaker 4: of them.
[10:12] Speaker 6: Gee, I hope they don't keep you in jail too long.
[10:14] Speaker 6: Because the calendar only runs till the end of December.
[10:17] Speaker 6: And after that, you wouldn't know what time it was.
[10:20] Speaker 8: So long, mister. All right to you.
[10:31] Speaker 4: Hey, Molly, did Luke call yet? Did he call? Did
[10:33] Speaker 4: the phone ring?
[10:34] Speaker 6: Not yet, McGee. See, I wonder if I should run
[10:36] Speaker 6: downtown and buy a new hat for the trial. I
[10:39] Speaker 6: know you want me to look nice for the judge
[10:41] Speaker 6: because that might help, you know.
[10:42] Speaker 4: You just relax, Tootsie. There ain't gonna be any trial.
[10:44] Speaker 6: I hope you're right.
[10:45] Speaker 4: Look, all it takes on legal trouble like this is connections,
[10:47] Speaker 4: that's all. And I'm a guy with connections.
[10:50] Speaker 2: Mr.
[10:50] Speaker 6: Wimple, you mean?
[10:51] Speaker 4: You betcha.
[10:51] Speaker 5: All Wimple has to do is merely convince Fudd Sutton
[10:54] Speaker 5: that Albie Ross should get Horace Collier to talk that
[10:56] Speaker 5: guy Corner out of persecuting me and call the whole
[10:57] Speaker 5: thing off. Doggone that doggone dog anyhow.
[11:01] Speaker 4: If he hadn't come into my life... Ah, that must
[11:04] Speaker 4: be Wimple now. Here's where my connections lay off.
[11:07] Speaker 6: Hello?
[11:08] Speaker 4: Hello? Who is it?
[11:09] Speaker 2: Is that you, Wimple?
[11:10] Speaker 6: Yes, Mr. McGee.
[11:12] Speaker 4: It's him, Molly. Did you get to Fudd Sutton okay, Wimple?
[11:14] Speaker 1: Yes, Mr.
[11:15] Speaker 6: McGee.
[11:15] Speaker 4: He talked to Albie Ross?
[11:17] Speaker 3: Yes, Mr.
[11:18] Speaker 6: McGee.
[11:18] Speaker 4: Ross talked to Horace Collier?
[11:20] Speaker 3: Yes, Mr.
[11:20] Speaker 6: McGee.
[11:21] Speaker 4: Collier talk to that guy Corner yet?
[11:23] Speaker 2: Yes, Mr.
[11:24] Speaker 4: McGee. Swell, Wimp, swell. What did Corner say?
[11:27] Speaker 2: No, Mr.
[11:27] Speaker 6: McGee.
[11:28] Speaker 3: What?
[11:29] Speaker 4: No? You mean he won't call off the case?
[11:31] Speaker 1: Oh, dear.
[11:32] Speaker 4: Why not?
[11:33] Speaker 7: Well, it's that interview you gave the Gazette. The paper
[11:36] Speaker 7: came out and Mr. Corner read it and he simply
[11:39] Speaker 7: lived it. He says he was ready to call it
[11:41] Speaker 7: all off till he.
[11:42] Speaker 2: Read that article.
[11:42] Speaker 3: Yeah, but.
[11:43] Speaker 6: He didn't mind what.
[11:43] Speaker 7: You said about him. But when you abused and insulted
[11:46] Speaker 7: his dog... Oh, he's fighting mad.
[11:50] Speaker 9: I'm sorry.
[11:51] Speaker 3: I tried. Thanks, Wally.
[11:55] Speaker 6: One of your connections come unscrewed, dearie? Yeah.
[12:00] Speaker 4: You better buy that new hat after all. I'm going
[12:02] Speaker 4: to need all the help I can get.
[12:14] Speaker 2: Fibber and Molly will be right back.
[12:16] Speaker 3: This is Bill Goodwin, ladies and gentlemen.
[12:18] Speaker 2: Have you heard the wonderful new features on Bob Hope's
[12:20] Speaker 2: morning radio show? Bob Hope and the experts, for instance,
[12:24] Speaker 2: provides about as many laughs as you can crowd into
[12:26] Speaker 2: a few minutes. Real experts like Don Loper on styles
[12:29] Speaker 2: and fashion, Kitty Turmel on etiquette, and Chef Malani on cooking.
[12:33] Speaker 2: They're Bob's guests and answer questions from the audience while
[12:36] Speaker 2: Bob helps with answers of his own. Let's listen in
[12:39] Speaker 2: on Bob and Chef Malani, for instance, during a recent session.
[12:48] Speaker 3: I got a massage.
[12:49] Speaker 2: I got a massage from you, from Luigi.
[12:51] Speaker 3: A massage in my pocket.
[12:55] Speaker 6: See, he speaks a better English than I do.
[12:59] Speaker 2: You know, when he was three years old, he could
[13:01] Speaker 2: speak a better English than I speak.
[13:02] Speaker 1: Now that I'm 47 years old.
[13:03] Speaker 2: Well, that's the kind of fun you're missing if you
[13:07] Speaker 2: don't try to listen to Bob Hope every morning on
[13:09] Speaker 2: this NBC station. See your local paper for the time.
[13:20] Speaker 6: And none of my friends ever heard of a case
[13:22] Speaker 6: like this, McGee. Alienating a dog.
[13:24] Speaker 4: Me neither.
[13:25] Speaker 6: All I could find out was Mabel Toops' cleaning woman
[13:27] Speaker 6: says her uncle was once charged with embezzling a horse.
[13:31] Speaker 4: Embezzling a horse? Sounds like a similar case. How'd he
[13:34] Speaker 4: come out?
[13:34] Speaker 6: A broken man.
[13:37] Speaker 4: Well, good night. Good night, all.
[13:45] Speaker 2: NBC and Plymouth Cars have brought you the Pepper McGee
[13:49] Speaker 2: and Molly program transcribed with Bill Thompson as Mr. Wimple
[13:52] Speaker 2: and Arthur Q. Bryan as Dr.
[13:53] Speaker 3: Gems.
[13:55] Speaker 2: On Monday, McGee goes on trial for alienating the affections
[13:58] Speaker 2: of Mr. Corner's dog, Flash. As the courtroom in Wistful
[14:01] Speaker 2: Vista has a very limited capacity, you are urged to
[14:04] Speaker 2: remain at home, tuned in to this station as the
[14:07] Speaker 2: proceedings will be broadcast. This is John Wald reminding you
[14:10] Speaker 2: to listen again on Monday night to Pepper McGee and Mom.
[14:26] Speaker 2: Follow the Senate committee hearing tonight on the NBC radio network.
[14:34] Speaker 2: NBC Radio Network. That concludes Fibber McGee and Molly.
[14:43] Speaker 1: Sued for alienating Flash's affections.
[14:46] Speaker 2: Follow Fibber McGee and Molly for more classic broadcasts.

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