# Fibber McGee and Molly - "Claiming the Moon" (Old Time Radio, 1956)

An episode of [Fibber McGee and Molly | Old Time Radio](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1858238532), 24 Aug 2026, 15 min.

Audio: https://dts.podtrac.com/redirect.mp3/api.spreaker.com/download/episode/74647824/e247b26565ef409f_mastered.mp3

Fibber McGee and Molly presents “Claiming the Moon,” episode 1277 of the classic comedy series, originally broadcast on January 24, 1956. This local archival recording is identified by its original title, date, and episode number; no verified plot summary is supplied with the surviving source information. Fibber McGee and Molly presents the original broadcast with a newly produced contextual introduction, a short closing announcement, and gently cleaned and mastered audio for a more consistent listening experience. Chapters: 00:00 Victor Sterling Introduction 00:30 Original Broadcast 14:58 Closing Support Old Time Retro Radio at https://www.patreon.com/oldtimeretroradio

## Transcript

[0:00] Speaker 1: January twenty fourth, nineteen fifty six brings us Fiber McGhee
[0:03] Speaker 1: and Molly in episode one, two hundred and seventy seven,
[0:07] Speaker 1: claiming the moon. For this late night listening hour, we
[0:11] Speaker 1: returned to a broadcast from that winter evening and the
[0:14] Speaker 1: continuing radio life of Fibber and Molly. It is a
[0:18] Speaker 1: welcome occasion to put aside the day for a few
[0:20] Speaker 1: minutes and give the old radio speaker it's due. Here, then,
[0:25] Speaker 1: is Fiber McGhee and Molly now back to the golden
[0:28] Speaker 1: age of radio.
[0:30] Speaker 2: Miles Laboratories, makers of Alca Seltzer bring you another visit
[0:34] Speaker 2: with Fiber McGhee and Molly again. We invite you to
[0:44] Speaker 2: listen to the transcribe adventures of Fiber McGee and Molly.
[0:48] Speaker 2: The show was litten by Pell Leslie and Ralph Goodman
[0:50] Speaker 2: and directed by Max Hudder. We'll see what's going on
[1:00] Speaker 2: in Wistflo Vista shortly.
[1:02] Speaker 3: This is eleanor Engel mother.
[1:04] Speaker 4: When your family tells you you're the best cook in
[1:07] Speaker 4: the whole world, it's music to your ears. But when
[1:11] Speaker 4: you're good, cooking tempts someone in the family into overeating
[1:14] Speaker 4: and indigestion results here's something else that's music to the ears. Yes,
[1:25] Speaker 4: it's that cheerful Alka Seltzer fizz music to the ears,
[1:30] Speaker 4: because that PiZZ means relief.
[1:32] Speaker 3: Is on its way.
[1:33] Speaker 4: Alka Seltzer works quickly and gently to soothe and settle
[1:38] Speaker 4: an unsettled stomach and relieve that stuffy, too full feeling.
[1:42] Speaker 4: And if you've tried Alka Seltzer before, I don't have
[1:45] Speaker 4: to tell you you'll be feeling like your old self
[1:48] Speaker 4: again in mighty short order. So whenever you or anyone
[1:52] Speaker 4: of the family has the unhappy, uncomfortable feeling of indigestion,
[1:57] Speaker 4: upset stomach, or heartburn, reach for your package of Alka Seltzer.
[2:02] Speaker 4: It's the favorite of so many for relief that does
[2:06] Speaker 4: so much.
[2:17] Speaker 3: What are you, sir, wrapped up in there? McGee? You've
[2:19] Speaker 3: been sitting as quiet as a mouse at a cab
[2:21] Speaker 3: show all morning.
[2:22] Speaker 5: Huh oh.
[2:23] Speaker 6: I'm reading, Molly, studying up on these government pamphlets I
[2:26] Speaker 6: got in the mail.
[2:27] Speaker 3: Government pamphlets.
[2:28] Speaker 6: Yeah, some very interesting information in these little booklets. I
[2:31] Speaker 6: could take this one here I got it's called New
[2:34] Speaker 6: Methods of Animal Husbandry.
[2:36] Speaker 5: I'm going to give this one to.
[2:37] Speaker 3: Mabel Mabel, Mabel toos.
[2:39] Speaker 6: I figure a girl who's married to a jackass like
[2:41] Speaker 6: mort can use a little animal husbandry, don't you get it?
[2:45] Speaker 5: Molly, animal jackass more.
[2:46] Speaker 3: Toobs Ain't funny? McGee?
[2:47] Speaker 6: Well, I'm in a serious mood this morning. This other
[2:51] Speaker 6: pamplet here. How to file a claim? This, this has
[2:52] Speaker 6: got me just fascinating.
[2:54] Speaker 3: How to file a claim on what buried treasure on land?
[2:58] Speaker 5: Get on land? It's fairly easy to according to the booklet.
[3:02] Speaker 6: Biggest trouble, of course, is finding a piece of land
[3:04] Speaker 6: someplace that somebody don't already own.
[3:06] Speaker 3: Well, I'll admit I don't know of anny, although if
[3:08] Speaker 3: they're still sending out those pamphlets, Wait a minute, let
[3:12] Speaker 3: me see the date on that thing. No, it's a
[3:15] Speaker 3: new one.
[3:16] Speaker 6: Oh you mean the covered wagon and the Indians on
[3:18] Speaker 6: the front page here, that's just symbolical of the original
[3:21] Speaker 6: land rush back in the old days.
[3:23] Speaker 3: I see it is now. Boy, that was the.
[3:25] Speaker 6: Time to file the claims. Plenty of land then.
[3:27] Speaker 3: Plenty of indians too. My goodness, look at that man
[3:31] Speaker 3: of the arrow stuck right through him.
[3:33] Speaker 5: Yeah, ah, those were the good old days.
[3:36] Speaker 6: I mean about getting rich, all you had to do
[3:39] Speaker 6: was file a few claims at your local courthouse and
[3:41] Speaker 6: set back. My uncle Sycamore made a fortune out of
[3:44] Speaker 6: Texas well.
[3:45] Speaker 3: Rogers and Hamerstein did well with Oklahoma too, But they
[3:48] Speaker 3: got you.
[3:49] Speaker 6: We'd been living in those days, Kittle, with my brains
[3:52] Speaker 6: and that letter for track that you got in high school.
[3:54] Speaker 6: We'd own half of California.
[3:55] Speaker 3: Now, didn't have everybody yelling at us about this smog,
[3:59] Speaker 3: asking us what we're gonna do about it? No, thank you.
[4:02] Speaker 6: You know, kiddo, you got a great natural talent for
[4:04] Speaker 6: looking at the dark side of things.
[4:06] Speaker 5: Where's your sense of adventure?
[4:08] Speaker 3: In the third row of the balcony at the BJU
[4:10] Speaker 3: Theater with a bag of popcorn in my lap let
[4:14] Speaker 3: Robert Taylor and Lana Turner go adventure, I'll watch. I'm
[4:19] Speaker 3: very happy with my little home, husband and fireside, where
[4:22] Speaker 3: it's peaceful, quiet, soothing. All the water heater again, the
[4:26] Speaker 3: pressure valve. I thought I had that thing of pie wrench. Quick, niggie,
[4:29] Speaker 3: I've had the moth.
[4:30] Speaker 4: Get down a he.
[4:45] Speaker 7: Ah.
[4:46] Speaker 5: No, back to my reading again.
[4:48] Speaker 6: See if I just do some good land, someplace that
[4:51] Speaker 6: I could file claim on.
[4:53] Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I got it.
[4:55] Speaker 6: This is the most fabulous, most hey Molly, oh, Molly,
[4:59] Speaker 6: hey Molly, what what is it?
[5:00] Speaker 3: Not the water heater again?
[5:01] Speaker 6: Don't tell me, no, no, take it easy, Kiddle. I
[5:04] Speaker 6: just got the greatest, most fabulous idea. Oh, this is terrific.
[5:07] Speaker 3: What is it?
[5:08] Speaker 5: Land? Kiddle?
[5:09] Speaker 3: Land?
[5:10] Speaker 6: I just figured out where it's some land that nobody owns.
[5:13] Speaker 6: I don't think land that we can file claim on
[5:15] Speaker 6: right here in whistlel Bista.
[5:16] Speaker 3: If you're thinking about that bacon lot over by the
[5:18] Speaker 3: railroad tracks, I'm sure somebody.
[5:20] Speaker 6: No, no, no, no, this is big, Molly. It's so big.
[5:23] Speaker 6: It's just fantastic. It's worth rushing down to the Federal
[5:26] Speaker 6: Building and filling out a few farms to find.
[5:28] Speaker 3: Out where is this land that you're talking Look.
[5:30] Speaker 6: It says right here in the booklet. Any land not
[5:33] Speaker 6: previously laid claim to may be filed upon at the
[5:36] Speaker 6: Federal Building by filling out forms six five four seven
[5:39] Speaker 6: to six' five eighty two and the amendments there.
[5:42] Speaker 3: Too all, right all, right but where's the? Land sit?
[5:44] Speaker 6: Down, said brace. Yourself how would you like my dear
[5:51] Speaker 6: to be married to the man that owns the?
[5:53] Speaker 3: Moon what the? Moon oh if.
[5:58] Speaker 5: Nobody else has grabbed, it grabbed your. Haad let's go.
[6:11] Speaker 2: In just a, moment we'll try to straighten out the.
[6:12] Speaker 2: Mcgeese fun is good for.
[6:15] Speaker 4: You we all know, That but do you always feel
[6:18] Speaker 4: up to enjoying your? Fun whenever a headache or an
[6:21] Speaker 4: upset stomach or general achiness keeps you from enjoying the.
[6:25] Speaker 4: Fun that's so good for?
[6:27] Speaker 3: You Drink Alka.
[6:28] Speaker 8: Seltzer Alka seltzer tablets dropped into a glass of water
[6:31] Speaker 8: fizz and become a liquid way to, Relieve and starting
[6:35] Speaker 8: with a liquid is wise because anything else you swallow
[6:38] Speaker 8: has to be changed by your body into liquid form
[6:41] Speaker 8: before it can help.
[6:42] Speaker 4: You Alka seltzer becomes a relief giving liquid that's better
[6:46] Speaker 4: because of action in the.
[6:48] Speaker 3: Glass that's.
[6:49] Speaker 8: Right action in the glass Changes Alka seltzer tablets into a,
[6:52] Speaker 8: liquid the form your system can use most.
[6:55] Speaker 5: Easily and naturally for.
[6:56] Speaker 4: Relief, yes action in the glass makes alcol seltzer easy
[7:00] Speaker 4: to absorb, immediately you Like Alka seltzer for refreshing.
[7:05] Speaker 6: Relief Land, Office i'll be down this way. Somewhere Federal Waterways,
[7:20] Speaker 6: Bureau bureau Of Internal, REVENUE Oh Foreign Aid, Department Patty
[7:27] Speaker 6: loan's division one billion or under.
[7:32] Speaker 5: Federal.
[7:32] Speaker 3: Land, hey, here there it is, there it is down
[7:34] Speaker 3: the end of the. HALL i still think this whole
[7:36] Speaker 3: idea is kind of. Silly, again we.
[7:37] Speaker 6: Take that, Attitude, molly be. Optimistic do you wish think of?
[7:40] Speaker 6: It if this works, out we could be.
[7:41] Speaker 3: Millionaire it just seems so silly finding a claim on
[7:44] Speaker 3: the whole.
[7:44] Speaker 6: Move i'm not going to be a pig about it
[7:46] Speaker 6: or anything like. That we don't have to keep it.
[7:47] Speaker 6: All we'll give some of the way to our friends and,
[7:50] Speaker 6: hey that'll solve the problem of what to give them
[7:53] Speaker 6: this different.
[7:53] Speaker 5: Next, christmas a hunk a.
[7:55] Speaker 3: Moon here's the.
[7:56] Speaker 6: Office oh, yeah, well come on.
[7:59] Speaker 5: Over how do you?
[8:00] Speaker 9: Do is there SOMETHING i can do for?
[8:03] Speaker 5: You, Yeah?
[8:03] Speaker 6: Bud is this the place where you Keep form six
[8:06] Speaker 6: five four seven to sixty five eighty two and the
[8:07] Speaker 6: amendments there.
[8:08] Speaker 5: Too, yes that's.
[8:10] Speaker 9: Right filing the land, claim are you?
[8:12] Speaker 3: Migue let's skip.
[8:13] Speaker 5: This that's, Right, Bud, molly, Please i'm trying to talk
[8:15] Speaker 5: to the.
[8:15] Speaker 9: Man, well we haven't had a claim filed in a long.
[8:18] Speaker 9: TIME i didn't know there was any open.
[8:20] Speaker 6: Land left in this. Area, well this, Land i'm going
[8:22] Speaker 6: to file. For isn't exactly In West slovista.
[8:25] Speaker 9: Or out of the, county is?
[8:26] Speaker 2: It?
[8:26] Speaker 3: Oh indeed it, is. Sir in, fact the d le
[8:29] Speaker 3: as in, mind is clear out of this. World.
[8:31] Speaker 9: Yes, well the usual, procedure, sir is to file your
[8:34] Speaker 9: claim in the office nearest to the land, desired because.
[8:36] Speaker 6: That's exactly What i'm, Doing. Bud your office here is
[8:40] Speaker 6: near as any.
[8:40] Speaker 5: Place. Oh in, fact.
[8:42] Speaker 6: You can see the property from your office window. THERE
[8:45] Speaker 6: i can see it from my front.
[8:46] Speaker 9: Porch BUT i thought you said it was quite some
[8:49] Speaker 9: distance from, here.
[8:49] Speaker 3: Sir, oh what's quite a distance all? Right, yes, indeed and.
[8:53] Speaker 5: You can't see it right.
[8:53] Speaker 6: Now of, course in the daytime you have to wait
[8:56] Speaker 6: till dark to see it from.
[8:57] Speaker 5: HERE i.
[9:00] Speaker 6: Say you can only see the property at, night and
[9:02] Speaker 6: the darker night it, is the better you can see.
[9:04] Speaker 6: It so if you just give me the, Forms i'll
[9:06] Speaker 6: get busy.
[9:06] Speaker 9: Here i'm, sorry, sir But i'm AFRAID i am very.
[9:10] Speaker 9: Confused would you mind telling me just exactly where this property?
[9:14] Speaker 6: Is there's nothing confusing about, It. Bud the Land i'm
[9:18] Speaker 6: filing for is the.
[9:20] Speaker 9: Moon oh, well in that, case just the, moon the
[9:25] Speaker 9: one up there AND i mean out there.
[9:28] Speaker 3: The moon my very, words young, man same inflection and.
[9:32] Speaker 6: Everything, yeah if you're through doing that imitation Of Betty
[9:37] Speaker 6: canner with your eyes.
[9:38] Speaker 5: There but i'd like to have my.
[9:39] Speaker 9: Forms oh, yes, certainly. Sir you're here your forms six
[9:48] Speaker 9: five four seven two six five eight. Two just fill
[9:52] Speaker 9: them out over there at the far.
[9:54] Speaker 5: Desk, Good and then what DO i? Do bring them
[9:56] Speaker 5: back here to?
[9:56] Speaker 2: You or?
[9:57] Speaker 9: No they have to go To let me look at
[9:59] Speaker 9: that period room five two nine, upstairs that's the place
[10:04] Speaker 9: to take them five two.
[10:05] Speaker 5: Nine rite that down my life five two.
[10:07] Speaker 9: Nine they'll take it from, there. Sir and, now if
[10:10] Speaker 9: you'll excuse, ME i have to report to my. Supervisor
[10:13] Speaker 9: he likes to know when everthing's like.
[10:15] Speaker 5: This sure he's a nervous, kid isn't.
[10:18] Speaker 3: He he probably never had anything like this.
[10:20] Speaker 6: Before, well we're on our way to see let's sit
[10:23] Speaker 6: down over, here fill out these forms and then fame
[10:25] Speaker 6: fortune in room five twenty. Nine here we come see
[10:40] Speaker 6: room five, eleven five, thirteen five. FIFTEEN i guess return.
[10:46] Speaker 3: Here it doesn't matter to me those forms have me, said,
[10:49] Speaker 3: DIZZY i don't know which Way i'm going? Anyhow what
[10:52] Speaker 3: a mess filling out those.
[10:53] Speaker 6: Things, well the government's got to be careful who they
[10:55] Speaker 6: give a thing like the moon. TOO i GUESS i
[10:57] Speaker 6: wouldn't want it to get in the wrong, hand you. Know,
[11:00] Speaker 6: WELL i mean suppose some syropuss got hold of it
[11:02] Speaker 6: and decided to turn it off every night or something
[11:04] Speaker 6: just for. Spite that could mess up a lot of. Things,
[11:07] Speaker 6: NOW i still think this whole thing is. Silly would
[11:09] Speaker 6: he give us these forms to fill out and send
[11:11] Speaker 6: us up here to room five twenty nine for? Nothing,
[11:14] Speaker 6: NO i wouldn't think, So oh, Sir if he says
[11:16] Speaker 6: go to room five twenty, nine there's a. Reason so
[11:18] Speaker 6: oh here we, are, yes room five Twenty why that dirty?
[11:23] Speaker 3: Rat, okay, now will you go home and forget?
[11:26] Speaker 6: It that dirty five twenty Nine County psychiatrist, Office that wise.
[11:32] Speaker 6: Acre that's smart elec wasting my time like, this sending
[11:35] Speaker 6: me up. HERE i had a strange feeling that he didn't.
[11:37] Speaker 6: Believe report to his. Supervisor, Willy i'll report to his.
[11:40] Speaker 6: Supervisor i'll have his. Job that's What i'll.
[11:42] Speaker 2: Have.
[11:43] Speaker 5: Is come, on let's go back.
[11:44] Speaker 3: Downstairs too, late deary, Huh look what time it? Is
[11:46] Speaker 3: the offices are all close ten minutes.
[11:48] Speaker 6: Ago oh my, gosh quarter to. Five, well he hasn't
[11:51] Speaker 6: heard the last of. This i'll be down here when
[11:53] Speaker 6: they open up tomorrow morning and we'll see about, this.
[11:55] Speaker 6: Dear if he thinks he's going to beat me out
[11:57] Speaker 6: of the greatest land grab in, History i'll take this
[11:59] Speaker 6: thing to The Supreme, court because if anybody gets that,
[12:02] Speaker 6: MOON i, do.
[12:03] Speaker 3: And i'll hear tomorrow.
[12:04] Speaker 2: Morning tuber And molly have a final word for you to. Come.
[12:21] Speaker 4: MOTHER i know you won't give your children every possible.
[12:24] Speaker 4: Advantage i've never met a good mother who. Didn't and
[12:28] Speaker 4: you probably know that your children must have enough vitamins
[12:32] Speaker 4: to help maintain normal growth and, development to keep alert
[12:35] Speaker 4: and energetic as they should. Be, now your, meals no
[12:39] Speaker 4: matter how well, planned may not always contain enough. Vitamins
[12:43] Speaker 4: that's why so many mothers Buy one A day brand
[12:46] Speaker 4: multiple vitamin tablets to fortify their. Meals you, See one
[12:51] Speaker 4: A day brand multiple vitamins supply all the vitamins children
[12:55] Speaker 4: and adults normally need to. Take they're easy to, swallow
[12:59] Speaker 4: and they leave no. Aftertaste and you can buy this
[13:02] Speaker 4: protection for less than three cents a. Tablet so protect
[13:06] Speaker 4: your family from vitamin. Shortage fortify your meals with one
[13:11] Speaker 4: a day brand multiple vitamin.
[13:13] Speaker 3: Tablets, yeah you're the first ONE i.
[13:23] Speaker 6: Called, WELL i can't tell you very much about it
[13:25] Speaker 6: TILL i get the deal set at The Federal.
[13:27] Speaker 3: Building but believe, me, boy it's big. McGee it's almost.
[13:31] Speaker 6: Midnight just a, minute, Kittle, yeah we. Look have you
[13:35] Speaker 6: ever thought of buying a nice piece of property for the,
[13:37] Speaker 6: future a quiet spot with a fine view and plenty
[13:41] Speaker 6: of fresh. Air, WELL i got the place for, you.
[13:44] Speaker 6: Boy it's really out of this. World and huh your
[13:48] Speaker 6: wife's calling. You, oh your wife's small on. You well
[13:52] Speaker 6: you better, Hello, Hello, Hello.
[13:57] Speaker 5: Well i'll put him down as it. Possible oil boil
[14:00] Speaker 5: WHEN i get down that fidder.
[14:01] Speaker 3: A little into warm, McGee get to.
[14:03] Speaker 5: Bed oh, okay so long everybody see you.
[14:07] Speaker 3: Tomorrow, Bye.
[14:14] Speaker 2: Bibber McGee And molly transcribed has brought to You mondays
[14:17] Speaker 2: Through fridays at this time By Miles, laboratories makers Of Alka.
[14:21] Speaker 2: Seltzer the clerk was played By parley Bear. Well do
[14:32] Speaker 2: you suppose McGhee actually can lay claim to the. Moon
[14:36] Speaker 2: tune in tomorrow and see what. Happens this Is John
[14:39] Speaker 2: wall saying so long for.
[14:40] Speaker 10: Now weekdays follow the story Of Pepper young's family on
[14:49] Speaker 10: MOST nbc radio.
[14:51] Speaker 7: Stations we Leave fibermagee And molly With claiming The. Moon
[15:03] Speaker 7: Follow fibermagee And molly for more classic.
[15:06] Speaker 3: Broadcasts

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