# Pursued My Dream As A Photographer, Lost My Parents’ Support. Until They Learned...

An episode of [Reddit Stories](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1830891511), 27 Jun 2025, 19 min.

Audio: https://traffic.megaphone.fm/APO3436664306.mp3

Pursued My Dream As A Photographer, Lost My Parents’ Support. Until They Learned...

## Transcript

[0:00] Pursued my dream as a photographer.
[0:02] Lost my parents support until they learned about my 6 figure
[0:05] income. My parents went completely crazy
[0:08] when I decided to try my hand at fashion photography instead of
[0:11] attending college after high school.
[0:13] For months we quarreled over this.
[0:15] Ultimately they informed me that they would never forgive me and
[0:18] would stop interacting with me if I chose to go down this route
[0:20] rather than earning a college degree.
[0:23] Knowing that my connection with my parents was not my top
[0:25] concern at the moment, I did not let that deter me.
[0:28] My goal was to become a fashion photographer and I did just
[0:31] that. They were furious with me and
[0:33] avoided talking to me for a few years.
[0:35] I found it really challenging, particularly because I was so
[0:38] young and needed assistance from other family members.
[0:41] Most of the assistance I required was monetary.
[0:44] I had only ever worked summer jobs part time before and the
[0:47] money I had saved was insufficient to support myself
[0:49] in a new place. I was in dire need of help
[0:52] because at the time, I was an intern and didn't get paid much.
[0:56] Fortunately, my dad's older sister, my aunt, frequently sent
[0:59] me the money I needed to pay my bills.
[1:02] Naturally, my aunt had a soft spot for me because I had always
[1:05] been close to her daughter as a child.
[1:07] Even with her help, I occasionally still felt very
[1:10] alone. After I left home, my brother
[1:12] and dad began to act as though I didn't even exist, so I didn't
[1:15] have the support of my immediate family because it would cause
[1:19] friction between them. My aunt never disclosed to my
[1:21] father that she was providing financial support for me.
[1:24] Without a doubt, he would blame her for pushing me to make poor
[1:27] choices. In spite of this, my aunt
[1:29] informed me of my parents reactions to my decision.
[1:32] She would always bring me up to them when she saw them, but they
[1:35] would usually still react negatively.
[1:37] It was discouraging to hear them abruptly shift the subject.
[1:40] Then one year they suddenly demanded that I spend the
[1:43] holidays at home so that we could get back in touch.
[1:46] In the end, I returned that year to try again with our
[1:48] relationship. They were pretty normal about
[1:51] the whole thing, which surprised me because I had expected an
[1:53] emotional reunion. My mother later informed me that
[1:56] they knew I wouldn't alter my mind, so they made the decision
[1:59] to get in touch with me. Furthermore, they didn't want to
[2:02] be seen as the type of parents that didn't encourage their kids
[2:05] goals and aspirations because that would come across
[2:07] negatively. I came to see that rather than
[2:10] truly respecting my choice, they had only contacted me to protect
[2:13] their brand. Despite my disappointment, I
[2:16] made the decision to keep in contact with them in the hopes
[2:18] that they would someday reconsider their opinion of me.
[2:21] They have never seemed to be as proud of me as they are of my
[2:23] brother, even though I have told them about all of my successes
[2:26] over the previous few years. After earning a business degree,
[2:30] my brother began working with a friend of my dad's.
[2:33] He makes a nice living and my parents are always boasting
[2:35] about how he started providing for them as soon as he started
[2:38] working. I did offer to assist them
[2:40] monetarily, so it's not that I hadn't, but because of my
[2:43] unusual line of work, they turned me down saying they
[2:46] wouldn't feel comfortable taking my money because they weren't
[2:49] sure I could live comfortably without it.
[2:51] I was aware that this was not a sincere worry.
[2:54] It served as just another reminder that they didn't think
[2:56] I was performing well enough and would much rather rely on my
[2:59] brother. I was never going to be good
[3:01] enough for them no matter what I did.
[3:03] They relied on my brother instead of believing me, even
[3:06] after I assured them that I was OK and could help.
[3:09] It wasn't like they didn't require assistance.
[3:11] They have been having financial difficulties for the past few
[3:14] years, particularly following the pandemic.
[3:17] About two years ago, my parents had to close the cafe they owned
[3:20] and retire early because of significant losses sustained
[3:23] during the pandemic. My brother began providing them
[3:26] with financial help. At that point, it was quite
[3:28] offensive that they refused to assist me.
[3:30] In spite of this, I stopped insisting on staying in contact
[3:33] with them. After that, the only times we
[3:36] would see each other were at family gatherings where I would
[3:38] try to be as polite as possible since I knew they wouldn't value
[3:41] me. I even stopped spending the
[3:43] holidays at home. Rather, they would take
[3:46] advantage of the occasion to criticize and ridicule my
[3:48] decisions. I was done with that negativity.
[3:51] I no longer needed it in my life.
[3:53] Since then, our relationship has gotten much worse and we hardly
[3:57] ever communicate because I dislike discussing it.
[4:00] Very few family members are aware of my feelings.
[4:03] My cousin, who recently got engaged is one of the few who
[4:06] does. My family was invited to her
[4:08] engagement party a few days ago, but I was also invited.
[4:12] Regretfully, my illness prevented me from attending.
[4:15] After years of not speaking to me, my parents finally called me
[4:18] while I was away because of a chat my cousin had with them.
[4:22] I need to explain what my cousin told me before I talk to my
[4:24] parents about the phone call. As soon as I finished talking to
[4:27] my parents, I contacted my cousin to talk to her about it.
[4:31] She informed me that my parents had been boasting at the
[4:33] engagement party about my brother's big promotion at work
[4:36] and how he would now be making nearly twice as much as he had
[4:38] before. My cousin claimed that it was
[4:41] starting to irritate her. I'm not sure if that's accurate
[4:43] or if they were exaggerating. In addition to making the entire
[4:47] celebration about themselves, they were utterly disregarding
[4:49] the fact that I, their other kid, was succeeding in her life
[4:52] on par with, if not better than, her.
[4:55] She was aware that despite my best efforts to pretend
[4:58] otherwise, my connection with my parents clearly had an impact on
[5:01] me. Even though I had accomplished a
[5:03] lot, I felt like I could never do enough to make them proud of
[5:05] me. I found that to be really
[5:07] distressing. My cousin chose to defend me
[5:10] since she was aware of this. My relative mentioned how
[5:13] wonderful it was that they now had two children earning 6
[5:15] figures annually. As my parents were boasting
[5:17] about my brother, My parents, who hadn't bothered to stay in
[5:21] contact with me over the previous two years, were
[5:23] understandably startled since I didn't think it was necessary.
[5:27] I had never disclosed my income to them.
[5:29] My parents called me the following day after my cousin
[5:31] dropped that bombshell, without providing any further details.
[5:35] I was taken aback. When they called, they inquired
[5:37] as to whether I had been making six figures annually and whether
[5:40] I had been doing so for a number of years.
[5:42] Thinking they were finally calling to congratulate me and
[5:45] express their pride, I made the decision to be honest with them.
[5:48] They said they couldn't believe they had been forcing my brother
[5:51] to provide for them financially when I had been doing so well,
[5:54] which was really foolish and delusional of me.
[5:56] They had the gall to become upset rather than happy for me.
[5:59] They chastised me for not informing them of my earnings
[6:02] sooner so they could make an informed decision about which
[6:05] child should provide them with financial support.
[6:07] I couldn't speak. In retrospect, that was exactly
[6:11] the reaction I should have anticipated, but it was not the
[6:13] one I had anticipated. Let me tell you what occurred
[6:16] next if you think that's awful. My parents began to explain how
[6:19] they had put a lot of pressure on my brother.
[6:21] When I didn't reply, they said that he had been too busy
[6:24] providing for them to save enough money for his own future.
[6:27] They maintained that I should now pay $100,000 in reparations
[6:31] to help even things up because I hadn't been burdened in the same
[6:33] manner. They rationalized it by claiming
[6:36] that they were also my parents and that I had to share my
[6:38] brother's responsibility. They made it seem as though I
[6:41] had been avoiding accountability, utterly
[6:43] disregarding the fact that they had initially turned down my
[6:46] assistance. After giving their request some
[6:48] attention, I erupted in laughter and hung up.
[6:51] The scenario was so ridiculous that it was the only response I
[6:54] could summon. I then gave my cousin a call to
[6:56] get the whole narrative and to double check the information.
[6:59] I have been deliberately avoiding my parents ever since.
[7:02] After the call, I banned their number, but they began texting
[7:05] me from a burner phone, which I also blocked.
[7:08] In every one of their mails, I was accused of concealing my
[7:11] earnings. They said they would never have
[7:13] requested my brother for help and would have accepted my help
[7:16] instead if they had known about it sooner.
[7:18] Recently, I also received a text from my brother, who usually
[7:22] avoid similar situations. He stated that he thought our
[7:25] parents had a point, but he didn't want to pick sides.
[7:28] He acknowledged that they ought to have been more encouraging
[7:30] and that they had mistreated me. But he also said that I should
[7:33] have told them exactly how much I made, rather than leaving them
[7:36] in the dark if I really wanted them to accept my assistance
[7:38] when I first offered. He maintained that they couldn't
[7:41] have known I was doing so well for myself because this isn't a
[7:43] career they understood well. He said that he had been the
[7:46] only one providing for our parents up until this point, and
[7:49] that he thought it only right that I do the same.
[7:51] I owe it to them because they reared me, he reminded me, and
[7:54] whether I like it or not, they are also my parents.
[7:57] I'm bewildered now. I'm sorry for my brother, but
[8:00] I'm not sorry for my parents. Although we haven't had a
[8:03] fantastic relationship, it hasn't been as horrible as our
[8:06] relationship with our parents. He could have a point though,
[8:09] and I can't deny that. Is it bad of me to keep my
[8:12] actual income a secret from my parents?
[8:15] Edit Since people are curious as to why I never told my parents
[8:18] how much I made, here's the answer.
[8:21] First of all, I dislike discussing my income.
[8:23] I want people to trust me when I tell them that I have enough to
[8:26] aid them, especially my parents. Why would I pretend that I had
[8:30] the money to provide for them? Second, money isn't the only
[8:33] metric I used to gauge my achievement.
[8:36] For me, success is about following my dreams and
[8:38] realizing them, not about how much money I make.
[8:41] When I first began out, I felt just as accomplished since I had
[8:44] followed my passion and defied the odds.
[8:47] In addition to being wealthy, I wanted my parents to be proud of
[8:50] me for being content and successful in my line of work.
[8:53] Finally, I never realized that in order to get their approval,
[8:56] I would have to be specific about my salary.
[8:59] I suppose I've had some delusions about them throughout
[9:01] my life. Eventually, I thought they would
[9:04] treat me the same way they treated my brother, but that
[9:06] never materialized. Before any of this occurred, I
[9:09] did discuss this with my cousin, who informed me that I shouldn't
[9:12] have needed to disclose my income to my parents in order
[9:15] for them to treat me like their child.
[9:17] At least someone was on my side, so it was a tremendous relief
[9:20] when she told me that I hadn't done anything wrong.
[9:23] Additionally, I am positive that my aunt shares my cousin's
[9:26] viewpoint. But what really irritates me is
[9:29] that my brother, who had previously been impartial, is
[9:31] suddenly opposing me. I'm open to any suggestions you
[9:34] may have because I haven't decided whether or not I should
[9:37] feel bad about it. First update Hello, I appreciate
[9:41] all of your remarks. I suppose I needed that because
[9:44] going through them was a true eye opener for me.
[9:47] Actually, I had started to think that perhaps I was mistaken, but
[9:50] I no longer believe that to be the case.
[9:53] I blocked my brother as well after realizing that despite his
[9:56] initial neutrality, it had not aided me in any way.
[9:59] Unlike my aunt and cousin who both defended me, he never did.
[10:03] In all honesty, my brother is only supporting my parents today
[10:06] because they have never given him a reason to oppose them, in
[10:09] contrast to me, who undoubtedly has a number of reasons.
[10:13] I responded to his message prior to blocking him.
[10:16] Although he didn't grow up in the same household as me, I
[10:18] informed him that I still respected the idea that he was
[10:21] making the extra effort to defend our parents.
[10:23] He can never really comprehend what I've gone through since the
[10:26] parents he knows are so different from the parents I
[10:28] know. His statement?
[10:29] That I owe it to our parents to assist them whether I like it or
[10:32] not, was incredibly unjust. I owe them nothing.
[10:36] Nothing at all. Anything they did for me prior
[10:38] to my 18th birthday was required by law, not as a favor.
[10:42] I left home to pursue my aspirations as soon as I was no
[10:45] longer a minor. They didn't support me or even
[10:48] spoke to me for the next few years after that.
[10:50] My aunt, not my brother or my parents, had supported me during
[10:53] that period. My cousin provided me with
[10:56] emotional support the entire time.
[10:58] As a result, I seldom ever think of my brother or parents as
[11:01] family because they have never supported me.
[11:04] My aunt is the one person I owe the most.
[11:06] My brother has been providing for our parents alone for the
[11:09] past few years, and I don't blame him for that.
[11:12] It's not that I didn't offer assistance, in fact, I did, but
[11:15] they turned me down. I decided to cut them out of my
[11:18] life because of that. They also didn't appear to be in
[11:21] any worse shape without me. They haven't apologized to me,
[11:24] but now that they know how much I earn, they expect me to make
[11:27] it right. That's entitled and unfair, and
[11:29] I don't think I have to put up with it.
[11:31] I decided I didn't want to talk to my brother anymore after
[11:34] sending him that message, so I blocked him as well.
[11:37] Neither my brother nor my parents have messaged me since.
[11:40] My aunt, however, got in touch with me and informed me that my
[11:43] brother must have forwarded my message to my father.
[11:46] I had stated in the mail that my aunt had helped me out when my
[11:49] parents hadn't. My father went crazy over it, as
[11:52] we had anticipated, and started blaming my aunt for misguiding
[11:55] me. He thinks I wouldn't have
[11:57] deviated so much from my parents if my aunt had never encouraged
[12:00] me and had instead advised me to return to them and follow their
[12:02] rules. He maintains that we would have
[12:05] a far better connection now if it had occurred.
[12:07] To be honest, I have no idea why someone would think this.
[12:10] In all honesty, I would have found another means to follow my
[12:13] aspirations even if my aunt hadn't assisted me, I would not
[12:17] have abandoned them. I wouldn't be earning as much
[12:19] money or enjoying my career as much if I hadn't been able to
[12:22] pursue a career in photography. Rather, I would be angry at my
[12:25] parents for preventing me from pursuing my own interests.
[12:28] How would our relationship be enhanced by that?
[12:31] It would have significantly worsened the situation.
[12:33] My aunt is currently being used as a scapegoat, which seems to
[12:36] be all they need. They have been accusing her of
[12:39] being a bad sister. In their constant messages, they
[12:42] say that instead of supporting me, she would have persuaded me
[12:44] to return to my parents if she had been a decent sister.
[12:48] My present bad behavior, which they say has always been
[12:50] praised, is attributed to her. They have even implicated my
[12:54] cousin in this, claiming that it is not surprising that she has
[12:57] become impolite and uncultured. They contend that because my
[13:00] cousin called them out at her engagement party, this
[13:02] illustrates my aunt's incapacity to raise children appropriately.
[13:06] My parents are essentially acting irrationally.
[13:09] My aunt is certain that they won't let this go, despite the
[13:11] fact that she has barred them. They are intent on making a big
[13:14] deal out of it and playing the victim in a predicament they
[13:17] started. I truly don't know what else I
[13:19] can say to my brother. If he still believes that
[13:21] supporting our parents is appropriate in light of
[13:23] everything that has happened. I suppose I should have
[13:26] anticipated it. Perhaps this isn't unexpected
[13:28] because although he never mistreated me, he also never
[13:31] defended me. Second update Hello, I haven't
[13:36] posted anything for the past two weeks.
[13:38] My parents made the decision to make this drama public for some
[13:41] reason. They have posted a number of
[13:43] posts disparaging my aunt and myself in the last several days,
[13:46] and I honestly have no idea what they are trying to accomplish.
[13:50] They have been promoting A biased narrative in these posts.
[13:53] They say that despite the fact that photography is an unsteady
[13:56] career, my aunt pushed me to pursue it against their wishes.
[13:59] They also claim that I rejected their attempts to patch things
[14:02] up with me. They claim that when they
[14:04] recently requested financial assistance from me, I ostensibly
[14:07] offered but minimized my income. As a result, they had to rely on
[14:11] my brother, which has had an impact on his financial
[14:13] security. I'm still refusing to assist in
[14:16] placing all the weight on my brother, even though they're
[14:18] acting as though they just recently found out the whole
[14:21] truth about my financial status. A large portion of their story
[14:24] is false and it is entirely biased.
[14:27] I don't want to interact with them on social media, and
[14:30] neither does my aunt. We've been attempting to get in
[14:32] touch with them privately to request that they remove the
[14:34] posts. I even warned them that if they
[14:37] didn't comply, I would get legal help.
[14:39] But because no one is going to waste their money on a lawyer
[14:42] for something like this, I suppose my parents can see I'm
[14:45] bluffing. This is a minor nuisance, but
[14:47] it's not like it's having a significant impact on me.
[14:50] Many people, including those I haven't spoken to in years, have
[14:53] contacted me to inquire about the issue.
[14:56] The way they are handling this as a show bothers me a lot.
[14:59] I want my parents to remove their posts because I may have
[15:02] to share my side of the story with my aunt if they don't.
[15:05] Asking them to remove the post hasn't worked at all thus far,
[15:08] but neither of us wants to do that.
[15:10] We might eventually have to publicly present our case.
[15:13] We should go ahead according to my relative, but I'm sick of
[15:16] anticipating all the drama that will ensue.
[15:18] In any case, we must take the necessary action. 3rd update.
[15:23] My Last Post was 2 days ago and as I previously stated, we were
[15:27] at a loss on what to do. In the end, my aunt and I posted
[15:30] the truth, not just our version of events, in order to dispel my
[15:34] parents by a story we wanted to correct.
[15:36] The record. My parents haven't made any
[15:38] public remarks about it yet, but many people have left
[15:41] encouraging remarks. The rest of the family hasn't
[15:44] been as ignorant as I initially believed.
[15:45] It turns out many of them have observed throughout the years
[15:49] how my parents have been more publicly proud of my brother and
[15:51] have always treated him better than I have.
[15:54] Getting all of this support makes me very happy.
[15:56] At least I now know that in my heart they supported me, even
[16:00] though they had never previously spoken out about it.
[16:03] That is reassuring. But when my brother sent me an
[16:05] e-mail, his reply wasn't encouraging.
[16:08] I was advised that what I was doing was seriously messed up.
[16:11] He claimed that he had been attempting to manage the problem
[16:14] with our parents and had nearly persuaded them to remove their
[16:16] posts. However, they are now refusing
[16:19] to do so because I posted my side.
[16:21] He claimed that I wasn't the kind of person who would add
[16:23] fuel to the fire and stir up more controversy.
[16:27] He's correct. I didn't want to make things
[16:29] worse, but I had no other option.
[16:31] My brother has treated me unfairly.
[16:33] In my opinion, this was started by our parents, not by me.
[16:37] I only spoke the truth to avoid needless hatred toward my aunt
[16:40] and me. It's possible that my parents
[16:42] should have considered the repercussions before making such
[16:44] a fuss. I don't think I have anything
[16:46] further to say to my brother at this time.
[16:49] It is obvious that he has chosen a side and it is not mine.
[16:52] In any case, I had no desire to communicate with my parents.
[16:56] I don't mind at all if they all want to completely cut me out of
[16:59] their life. 4th Update Hi everyone, My last update was
[17:03] quite a few months ago. I recently returned home to
[17:06] attend the wedding of my cousin. As her maid of honor.
[17:10] I performed all of my responsibilities for her for
[17:12] about a month before the wedding, she informed me that
[17:15] neither my brother nor my parents had received an
[17:17] invitation. They shouldn't have been
[17:19] surprised by this because it was obvious that neither my aunt nor
[17:22] my cousin wanted anything to do with them following the events
[17:24] of a few months earlier. I don't see why my parents
[17:27] thought they would be invited when they hadn't even tried to
[17:30] apologize to any of us following the incident.
[17:33] They were not just disappointed that they hadn't received an
[17:35] invitation, but they had also expected one.
[17:38] They even came to shout at my aunt when she was at her
[17:40] residence. My father was incensed and
[17:42] informed her that she couldn't abandoned him for such a little
[17:45] matter. Coming from a dad who
[17:47] essentially pulled his daughter out of his life, that is rather
[17:50] ironic. My aunt quickly put him in his
[17:52] place after putting up with his antics after a heated argument
[17:56] that day. My parents are now ranting about
[17:58] us to anyone who would listen. I don't think anyone is taking
[18:01] them seriously though as it looks like the most of them are
[18:04] just looking to gossip. My brother has not gotten back
[18:07] to me, although it is unfortunate he has made the
[18:10] decision to support our parents. Everything went off without a
[18:13] hitch and the wedding was stunning.
[18:15] The icing on the cake was that I also got to spend a lot of time
[18:18] with my aunt and cousin. I've returned to work after a
[18:21] much needed vacation. Knowing that my parents haven't
[18:24] altered at All in all these months is comforting.
[18:27] Thank you for watching. If you haven't subscribed yet,
[18:30] please do so and hit the notification bell to stay
[18:32] updated with more shocking real life stories happening around
[18:35] you.

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