# NFL, Race Day & One Very Unhinged Handbag

An episode of [Vain-ish](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1824105551), 15 Sep 2026, 24 min.

Audio: https://enrichment.soundstack.com/4vjqq8/episode.flightcast.com/01M2HBQ3FWDR3THRYBCQYT4ZNS.mp3

Bec and Jess recap their most jam packed weekend yet, from a historic NFL clash at the MCG with over 100,000 fans and a 3:30am wake-up to Crown Makybe Diva Stakes Day at Flemington. They revisit the Rams’ brutal reception and Chris Judd’s legendary booing history, before Bec reveals the wild contents of Jess’ race day handbag. Find us on Instagram: @vainishpodcast Hosts: @becjudd and @jessierobertsx Producer: Liza Altarejos Audio Imager: Chris Marsh Video Producer: Justin Hill Find more great podcasts at LiSTNR

## Transcript

[0:02] a listener production.
[0:05] I'm Bec Judd.
[0:06] And I'm Jess Roberts.
[0:07] And we're done with the smoke and mirrors.
[0:09] Fainish shares honest stories about what it takes to look amazing because we did not wake up like this.
[0:15] And you should know the stuff that we chat about on this podcast is based on our personal experiences.
[0:21] We're sharing it for your entertainment.
[0:23] It's definitely not medical advice.
[0:26] And we'll always be clear with you when something is a paid endorsement.
[0:29] Please always chat with your qualified healthcare team before making any decisions about your health.
[0:49] Hey guys, it's Bec Judd.
[0:51] And Jess Robertson.
[0:52] Welcome to Vanish.
[0:53] Sorry, I'm just working my hair out because it's just...
[0:55] Your slut strands.
[0:56] My slut strands are just not slutting right now.
[0:58] Because what we do when we record Vanish is we have these really cool cameras in the studio where we shoot off some videos to you guys.
[1:05] So that promotes our videos on socials to tell you what we're covering this week.
[1:10] And Jess isn't happy with how she's going to look on the videos because her slut strands aren't out, but she has these long hair.
[1:17] I know.
[1:17] And you know what?
[1:18] There's been a few videos that have gone out the last couple of weeks.
[1:20] I'm like, Jess, what are you doing?
[1:22] You've just rolled in like a hot mess.
[1:24] I need to like, this is a vein-ish podcast.
[1:26] I'm so ish at the moment.
[1:27] You're the ish.
[1:28] Yes.
[1:29] And I'm trying to lift my vein up.
[1:30] When we record early in the week, we're always still a bit ish because we're recovering from the weekend.
[1:35] Always.
[1:35] Just like from all the dance runs, guys.
[1:37] Not from drinking at all.
[1:39] Not from drinking margaritas.
[1:40] No.
[1:40] All day Friday.
[1:41] All day Saturday.
[1:43] Maybe sometimes Monday.
[1:44] I mean, Sunday.
[1:46] So we had the best weekend.
[1:49] It was the NFL game in Australia, in Melbourne on Friday.
[1:55] It was the San Francisco 49ers versus the Los Angeles Rams at the MCG.
[2:02] Over 100,000 fans filled the MCG.
[2:05] And I didn't know what to expect, but my God, it was amazing.
[2:09] It was so good.
[2:10] It was so good.
[2:11] I just am laughing.
[2:13] I was saying earlier to Beck, how often people were saying 69ers instead of 49ers.
[2:19] Get your mind out of the gutters, everyone.
[2:22] I know.
[2:22] I was correcting everyone.
[2:23] I'm like,
[2:24] I don't know anything about football, but I knew their actual names.
[2:26] But yeah.
[2:27] San Francisco 49ers.
[2:28] It's so funny you say that because I was watching the news and one of the sports reporters was doing like a recap of the day and she said San Francisco 69ers as well.
[2:40] Did she really?
[2:41] Yeah.
[2:41] Australians just love 69ers.
[2:42] Dead undone.
[2:45] That's what we love.
[2:46] It's our favourite position.
[2:47] No, it's not.
[2:49] No.
[2:50] What?
[2:50] What?
[2:52] Anyway, so we had a great day.
[2:54] So this is how it rolled out.
[2:57] Because it was going live on Netflix to the world, because it was round one for the NFL.
[3:03] It's their season kickoff and it was their first game.
[3:07] It was, the game started at 10.30 in the morning, Australian Eastern Standard Time.
[3:13] So we had to get up.
[3:14] I was up at like 5.45.
[3:15] You were up at, I was at 3.30 or something.
[3:18] 3.30, getting ready.
[3:19] Yeah.
[3:20] We caught the train in.
[3:21] When I say 3.30, guys, like that was not because of like I'm that keen and it takes me that long to do my glam.
[3:28] I was keen but not to do my glam and stuff.
[3:30] It was just that my husband was sleeping with one of the children that night and he crawled into bed.
[3:34] I said, wake me up when you get up for your hot Pilates, which is about 5, 5.30.
[3:39] So when he gets up and walked into the room,
[3:43] my alarm go time to get up so I fully got up but then I couldn't get back to sleep after that so I was like oh stuff this I just went downstairs drank coffee fold washing and then the usual like what you do at 3 30 in the morning and then it got to like maybe six o'clock and then I started doing my glam so I wasn't like getting ready at that time
[4:01] But it was a different vibe heading into the G, seeing everyone in their merch.
[4:07] Yes.
[4:07] Like everyone, this is what I love about NFL and American culture is that everyone embraces the merch and the team and the branding so much.
[4:18] Yeah.
[4:19] Everyone was wearing merch.
[4:20] There was free Tim Tams getting handed out.
[4:22] There was a Vegemite stand.
[4:23] I was like loving it.
[4:23] Oh my God, but there were like bomb dogs, sniffer dogs.
[4:25] That was weird.
[4:27] There were like police, like the tactical police.
[4:30] Is that what you call them with all the machine guns, like ready to go?
[4:33] There was German Shepherds everywhere.
[4:34] Everywhere.
[4:35] I was sitting there like sniffer dogs.
[4:36] I'm going... And the dogs that look like they're on drugs because they're so wired.
[4:39] Wide, yeah.
[4:40] I'm sitting there just going like, guys, we have gun laws here, but anyway.
[4:43] Yeah, it was something that we... Do they sniff out machetes?
[4:45] I don't know.
[4:47] You need a machete sniffer dog.
[4:48] Yeah, yeah, yes.
[4:49] Yes, because that's how we roll in Melbourne.
[4:51] There's bins everywhere though, guys.
[4:52] It's fine.
[4:53] Empty bins.
[4:54] Empty bins.
[4:54] So...
[4:56] That was actually walking and seeing all of the police with a heavy presence of guns.
[5:01] I thought, oh, okay.
[5:03] That made me go, okay, it's like we're in America for the day, guys.
[5:06] Yeah, yeah.
[5:07] But it was just cool walking up to the G, being someone who always goes for cricket or goes for footy.
[5:12] It was a different vibe.
[5:14] It was cool.
[5:15] But it's also so cool to see those footballers on that field to be able to play that sport in front of – it's 104,000 people that –
[5:23] Yeah, it was just over 100,000.
[5:24] It was the seventh most highly attended game in NFL history.
[5:30] Wow.
[5:31] Yeah.
[5:31] That's cool for them.
[5:32] Yeah, which is why they put it at the G. So, like, I know this is going far and wide, and we get people sliding to our DMs listening from all over the world.
[5:41] Mm-hmm.
[5:42] And they go, listening from like Portland or whatever, everywhere.
[5:47] I will say that Melbourne is the sporting capital of the world and no one does events like Melbourne.
[5:56] That Melbourne can commit to four global events.
[5:59] Except for Commonwealth Games.
[6:01] We'll pay for the Commonwealth Games.
[6:02] Yeah, but we can't have it.
[6:03] No.
[6:04] We can do multiple world-class events with 10 out of 10, no notes, multiple on the same weekend.
[6:12] And the city comes alive.
[6:14] So on Thursday night before the game, there were lines, every restaurant, every bar.
[6:19] The city was buzzing.
[6:20] Like Melbourne does it like no one else.
[6:22] They just bloody nail it.
[6:23] It's made alive.
[6:24] for sport here and being at the G on that day with 100,000 people embracing it, it just felt cool and I felt proud of my city.
[6:30] I'm like, and this is why we stay.
[6:32] Yeah, yeah.
[6:33] Despite the empty machete bins.
[6:34] This is why we stay in Melbourne.
[6:36] Yeah, yeah.
[6:36] Honestly.
[6:37] Yeah, yeah.
[6:38] And I like, also the Jonas Brothers, which I actually had no idea they were doing the halftime.
[6:42] Yeah.
[6:42] So when I got, I died because I love the Jonas Brothers and I literally had no idea when I got there.
[6:47] Like, who's doing the halftime show?
[6:49] Like, is it Kylie?
[6:50] They're like, no, it's the Jonas Brothers.
[6:52] I was like, stop.
[6:53] It was like Christmas.
[6:54] It was like Christmas.
[6:54] Who's your favorite Jonas boy?
[6:56] Nick.
[6:56] Nick.
[6:57] Nick, yeah.
[6:58] Was he the main singer?
[6:59] No, that's Joe.
[7:00] Who's the one that went out with, was it Taylor Swift?
[7:02] Oh.
[7:03] Oh, who's the one who was married to the Game of Thrones chick?
[7:06] Jo.
[7:07] Okay.
[7:07] So he was, yeah, yeah, they've separated now.
[7:09] Yeah.
[7:09] And then Nick's dated marriage to the Indian.
[7:14] Oh, yeah.
[7:15] She was Miss India or something.
[7:16] She's beautiful.
[7:17] She's stunning.
[7:17] I've forgotten her name.
[7:18] And then Kevin's been married to Hayley.
[7:19] They've been married and like been together since like 15.
[7:23] And Cody Simpson.
[7:24] Cody Simpson, which I had no idea.
[7:26] You missed him.
[7:26] I missed him.
[7:27] I don't know if he must have been drinking or talking or whatever, but I missed him, yeah.
[7:31] Have said in real life, though.
[7:33] It was really cool hearing the coach speak after the game, the 49ers coach, and just saying, so the 49ers from San Francisco, they came out to Australia a week before.
[7:44] So they could acclimatise, they could get over the jet lag.
[7:47] And they were loving on Australia so hard.
[7:49] They were out and about at all the restaurants.
[7:51] Loved the coffee.
[7:52] Loved the coffee.
[7:53] They came to the Carlton Geelong game the previous Friday.
[7:57] They couldn't believe that the buffet had Chinese food for breakfast.
[8:00] They loved the hotel buffets.
[8:02] And you know what I will say?
[8:03] We did do well.
[8:04] Our buffets are so good.
[8:06] Mm-hmm.
[8:06] The only buffet that I reckon I've had that's better is probably like Atlantis, the Royal in Dubai, which is probably the best buffet in the world.
[8:12] But Australia generally does.
[8:14] A really good buffet.
[8:15] So they were loving that.
[8:17] They came out the week before.
[8:19] So the whole crowd was pretty much going for the 49ers because the LA Rams flew in the day before.
[8:23] Like, no, we're just going to stay on US time.
[8:26] We're going to get in and out.
[8:27] So when they all ran out to play...
[8:29] Everyone booed them.
[8:30] I know.
[8:31] The MC just 100,000 people booing them.
[8:33] I felt sorry for them.
[8:34] Yeah, I felt sorry.
[8:35] But then it's like, meh.
[8:36] I do feel like they should, I don't know.
[8:38] I feel like the booing is trauma.
[8:41] I feel like that should be illegal.
[8:42] I feel like they should stop that.
[8:45] I know if I got booed, I'd be so sad.
[8:46] Would you?
[8:47] I reckon I would.
[8:48] You know what?
[8:49] I would play better, but I don't think I would.
[8:51] I reckon you would because you're so competitive.
[8:53] You would be like, F you guys, you boo me.
[8:55] Like you booed the wrong person.
[8:57] No, I reckon I just would throw my tennis racket at the head.
[8:59] Like I wish someone booed me.
[9:01] Like whatever spot I was playing, I'd be like, ball at your head.
[9:03] Like I just, I don't know.
[9:04] It would hurt your feelings.
[9:05] It would hurt my feelings.
[9:06] feeling oh yeah next time i'm gonna go on my instagram and i wasn't gonna go yeah yeah yeah no i just yeah i would just get over things really quickly someone would boo me and then five seconds later i would have forgotten it but being the wife of someone who's one of the most heavily booed players probably in the afl what chris chris oh my god no he's not oh my god no he's so but yes no one should yeah are you kidding me yes because he was so good if you are really
[9:30] They boo you.
[9:31] They boo you.
[9:32] Oh, okay, boo me.
[9:32] To try and put you off your game.
[9:33] Boo me.
[9:34] But dickheads, he's one of those people who responds to a boo.
[9:37] You boo him, that is like poking the bear.
[9:40] Yeah.
[9:40] Right?
[9:41] And do you know what?
[9:42] His daughter is exactly the same.
[9:44] Yeah.
[9:44] Someone gives her shit in a game or gives her a little hip and shove, like this girl did at netball last week.
[9:49] I'm like, oh, no.
[9:50] You just elbowed the wrong person.
[9:52] Yeah.
[9:52] And then Billy, it's like a fire goes on in her.
[9:55] And this is what happened to Chris in a game.
[9:57] Someone was stirring him.
[9:58] He would take it to the next level.
[10:00] Game over.
[10:01] Best on ground.
[10:02] And his daughter, Billy, his daughter, my daughter, our daughter, does it as well.
[10:06] Anyone who gives her shit.
[10:08] She's like, it's on.
[10:09] Boom.
[10:09] Game on.
[10:10] You messed with the wrong person.
[10:11] Do you know what I said one day?
[10:12] I said to Chris, I'm like,
[10:13] I want to go over to the other team's players before the game, but they don't know I'm Billy's mum.
[10:19] I said, Ben, I've got to know you're Billy's mum.
[10:21] You know, but this is like in an ideal world.
[10:22] You know that centre who plays for the Dragons, that one over there and point to Billy, she's really mentally weak, so you need to get into it.
[10:29] If you get into her before the game and tell her she's bad and stuff, she'll fall to pieces and you'll beat her.
[10:35] So they go say that to her.
[10:37] Then she'll turn it on and she'll win the game.
[10:39] I don't know what my kids would do if they'd cry.
[10:42] Nah.
[10:43] I don't, yeah, no, I don't think they've ever been booed or like, well, they don't play contact sports, so I think that's probably what it is.
[10:49] Yeah, but maybe, I think like when someone sometimes gives you a shove, I don't know when I play contact sport.
[10:53] If someone gives me a shove, I'm like, all right, then we're on.
[10:56] Yeah.
[10:56] Well, Jacob plays soccer, but I've never, well, I've never been to one of his games, so I don't know.
[11:02] Yeah, so funny story at the MCG, Chris was presenting the award for the Norm Smith medal.
[11:08] This was when Collingwood won the grand final.
[11:12] I think it was like 2023.
[11:14] And we just thought like bygones be bygones.
[11:16] Chris has been retired for so long.
[11:18] Collingwood, you just won the grand final.
[11:20] Chris is getting up to present the Norm Smith medal in front of 100,000 people.
[11:25] And he was about to present it to a Collingwood player.
[11:27] We all knew who was going to win it, right?
[11:29] Yeah.
[11:30] And he gets up and they're like, yeah, I'm presenting the Norm Smith medal today.
[11:33] Chris Judd, 100,000 people.
[11:35] Boo.
[11:36] No.
[11:37] Still booed him after all that time because of the Carlton Collingwood rivalry.
[11:42] Yeah, yeah.
[11:43] It's like, guys, he's been out there for eight years.
[11:46] Your team just won.
[11:47] To still find negativity after your team's just won the grand final for a past player, I'm like, Collingwood.
[11:54] Who was never aggressive on the field.
[11:56] Your fans are so diehard.
[11:57] Yeah.
[11:58] Kind of like it.
[11:58] Yeah, yeah.
[11:59] Oh, my God.
[12:00] I would have died.
[12:00] I would have worked 100,000 people.
[12:03] Yeah.
[12:04] So it's a thing.
[12:04] It's a thing.
[12:05] The LA Rams had their, yeah, ship boot out of them.
[12:08] And they lost.
[12:09] So next time they probably need to come out a week before.
[12:11] But apparently they flew in and they didn't change their diet.
[12:14] I think they had all their water flown in, all the American water.
[12:17] They stuck to the LA time zone as well.
[12:19] So when they were flying straight back, they'd land on LA time.
[12:22] So there you go.
[12:24] It was fun.
[12:25] And, yeah, first NFL game.
[12:27] I'm definitely going back.
[12:28] I want to do a Super Bowl.
[12:29] Same.
[12:30] Our husbands won't let us.
[12:31] I feel like we're... Who needs permission?
[12:33] I know, but I said to Val... We're going.
[12:36] I said it to the boys like last year.
[12:37] I was like, oh, I feel like when we should do the Super Bowl, like, oh, that's kind of our thing.
[12:41] I really kind of slightly hinted at when we were at Coachella one year and I was like, you know what, guys?
[12:46] Now I'm going to go.
[12:47] Yeah, we're going to go and you're not invited and we'll just do our own thing and we'll get into all the cool parties and you won't.
[12:54] And you're not coming.
[12:55] We're going to blacklist you at all the doors.
[12:57] No, no, no.
[12:57] We'll be there.
[12:58] We'll be there.
[12:58] We'll be there.
[13:00] No, I do want to do this.
[13:01] My plan was to do it.
[13:02] We just put it out in the open.
[13:03] Well, let's manifest that.
[13:05] Yeah.
[13:05] Does Chris have any spare tickets?
[13:07] No.
[13:07] We'll do it our own way.
[13:08] Do it our own way.
[13:10] We've got connection.
[13:11] We won't even tell them.
[13:12] We'll just walk up like, hi.
[13:14] We'll just call Paul O'Brien and he'll organise the private jet and we will be there.
[13:17] Oh, Paul Paul.
[13:20] Paulie Pops, get the PJ ready.
[13:23] And a box.
[13:25] A sweet thank you.
[13:26] A sweet thank you.
[13:27] With Matt Damon, thank you.
[13:29] Yeah, thank you.
[13:30] Oh, my God.
[13:30] He's like, you guys are trauma.
[13:32] But done.
[13:32] Done.
[13:41] Okay, so after.
[13:43] From NFL.
[13:43] We went straight into Crown.
[13:45] We went from balls to horses.
[13:48] That's the way it's going to be, little darling.
[13:52] We did it.
[13:53] Oh, actually.
[13:54] They sang that.
[13:54] They sang that at the NFL.
[13:56] Oh, no, no, no.
[13:57] Yeah, they did.
[13:58] And they sang.
[13:59] This was the highlight.
[14:00] John Farnham.
[14:01] Jonas Brothers played John Farnham.
[14:03] You're the voice trying to understand it.
[14:05] Yeah.
[14:06] I love that.
[14:06] I love that they knew the song.
[14:08] They knew that song so well.
[14:10] My kids' school played that at their end of year assembly the year before.
[14:14] And it was so good because at previous schools, they'll do like 15 songs and do them like, you know.
[14:22] Whereas at this new school they go to, they just do one song.
[14:26] It was just one song at the assembly, but they'd practiced it all year and they had the bagpipes and they nailed it.
[14:32] And I only had to sit through one perfect song.
[14:34] See, I love that.
[14:35] I love sitting through all the songs.
[14:36] The 15 shit songs.
[14:38] Yeah, I'm such a stage mum.
[14:40] And I'm like, I get so excited.
[14:42] And then I get all like the little kids on there, the little preppies, like they're so cute.
[14:46] They're so cute.
[14:47] Remember when we were watching when Tom, Darcy, my twins and Jagger were up there.
[14:51] I think Jagger was like prep and Tom and Darcy were in year one.
[14:54] Yeah, and we were watching Tom and he was up there and he just started picking his nose and eating it.
[14:58] Well, everyone's doing their dance.
[14:59] They're like, where's... Oh, there he is.
[15:01] He's just like... And then we're like, is he?
[15:02] What?
[15:03] He's... Oh, he's picking his nose.
[15:04] He's going to eat it.
[15:05] Oh, he's going to eat it.
[15:06] Yeah, he's eating it!
[15:07] Oh, my God!
[15:11] I've got it on video.
[15:12] It's the best.
[15:13] That's my boy.
[15:15] Anyway, so we rolled into Crown Maccabi Diva Stakes Day at Flemington, which is like kicks off their spring racing carnal.
[15:23] It was the most amazing day.
[15:25] Like Australia's had such good weather.
[15:27] All the cities have been having good weather of late, and it's like spring is here.
[15:31] So we roll in a bit dusty.
[15:32] Our J-Rob here is a bit dusty than me.
[15:34] Sorry.
[15:35] Very nasty.
[15:36] And it was really cool.
[15:37] I was crying in the car on the way there.
[15:39] I was like, I can't do this.
[15:41] Why did I have that last shot?
[15:42] And that other last shot.
[15:44] And that other last shot.
[15:45] And I'm going, I'm just like, when am I going to learn?
[15:48] No, mine was just like rolling in because I had to do dance runs that morning as well.
[15:52] And then like Val was out doing like soccer things.
[15:55] And I was just like,
[15:56] have to have my hair and my makeup.
[15:58] And then I was like, my dress is too tight.
[16:00] I can't fit into it.
[16:00] You look so good and your boobs look so good.
[16:03] She rolls into Crown, right?
[16:04] They're a partner of mine.
[16:05] So I had to do like a get ready with me and all our girlfriends came.
[16:09] So Nadia came with her partner.
[16:11] Jess came with our girlfriend, G. Michelle and Steve Green came, who we own Jagged with.
[16:16] Effie Katz was there with James.
[16:18] And my hubby came.
[16:20] And so we're all getting ready at Crystal Club.
[16:22] Jess rolls in.
[16:23] My girlfriend.
[16:24] I nearly rocked in with trackies on.
[16:26] And she's like, this hot mess, really, really hot.
[16:30] Boobs are out.
[16:30] She's like, put my nails on.
[16:32] So we're literally in crystal club.
[16:33] I'm sticking her candy claws on.
[16:36] We've got funny footage of it.
[16:37] And I'm just like putting you together.
[16:39] We got you into the car.
[16:40] We went off to the races for the day.
[16:42] But you know what?
[16:43] You are actually the best at backing up.
[16:44] I cannot back up.
[16:46] You just back up.
[16:47] You just need one drink.
[16:48] And you're like, I'm back.
[16:49] Yeah, I'm back.
[16:49] How do you do that?
[16:51] Well, I cried in the car on the way there.
[16:53] So I had like full trauma.
[16:54] Then I was like, but my eyes look really blue now because I've just had a little teary session.
[16:57] Yeah, you look pretty.
[16:57] Because I get really red and I don't cry ever.
[16:59] I never, ever cry.
[17:00] But I literally was just like...
[17:03] I think just one of my kids is overseas, Vietnam, and hasn't slept the whole time.
[17:10] So she's traumatizing all the teachers over there.
[17:12] She just wants her mom.
[17:13] I was only going to get on a flight on Thursday to go collect her.
[17:17] Then I've got like my two other kids over the weekend were doing dance comps and soccer comps.
[17:22] And then I've got no help in terms of like family or...
[17:25] around to kind of help me and then all that stuff.
[17:27] So I think it was just so overwhelming.
[17:29] And then all the work events.
[17:30] And then all the work events.
[17:32] When we say work, they're the most fun social, best job ever.
[17:36] It is.
[17:36] And I think just like I was just so overwhelmed because I'm going, I just didn't know where my kids were or what was going on.
[17:42] That's what happens when you don't sleep and you're still drunk, babe.
[17:44] I know.
[17:45] I know.
[17:45] So I had a terry, but I put it all together, put her candy claws, like her candy claws on me.
[17:50] Oh my God.
[17:51] And it was a good day.
[17:52] It was a good day.
[17:53] And then we rolled into dinner.
[17:54] Rolled into dinner.
[17:55] And my husband finally met up with us because he is just so busy.
[18:00] He's so busy with work at the moment.
[18:01] And then...
[18:02] So he rolled in and then we were all ready for bed because we were all exhausted.
[18:05] And we're like...
[18:05] going to bed.
[18:05] He's like, oh, I'm glad you've all made a big effort for me.
[18:09] And we nagged him.
[18:11] He said, I can't come girls.
[18:12] I can't come to the races that day.
[18:13] I can't do the dinner.
[18:15] And then I cracked the sulks because I haven't seen my husband in like two weeks because we're literally ships in the night at the moment.
[18:20] And I was like, please come to a time with me.
[18:23] And like fully guilted.
[18:24] I'm like, we're going to have so much fun, I promise.
[18:26] And then like, if you get so, I'm like, I'm so tired now you're going to bed.
[18:29] And he's like, anyway.
[18:31] He still had fun.
[18:33] I love the, your...
[18:36] remember when we were unpacking your handbag at the races?
[18:40] It was so funny.
[18:42] So it's like, what are your race day beauty essentials?
[18:45] You had the most random shit in your handbag and you still had everything in plastic Ziplocs from the NFL because you couldn't take handbags into the NFL game.
[18:53] You had to put it in a plastic Ziploc.
[18:55] Clear.
[18:56] I took a video.
[18:57] Stop it.
[18:57] Let me narrate it.
[18:58] So this is the whole thing.
[18:59] I don't even remember because I probably was still drunk from the night before.
[19:03] Okay, I've got some footage of it.
[19:06] In your bag, a scrunchie, a pair of candy claws for your fingernails, a pair of candy claws French tip for your toenails, a sheet of prescription sleeping tablets.
[19:23] I can't name it because of TGA.
[19:26] Prescription...
[19:28] Sleeping tumble or anti-anxiety medication.
[19:30] I don't know what it is.
[19:32] Tampons.
[19:34] A wallet that had no cards in it.
[19:37] No money.
[19:39] Really pretty hand sanitiser.
[19:41] Your passport.
[19:43] What the fuck?
[19:45] Where were you flying?
[19:47] You never know.
[19:47] We'll have to flee the country.
[19:49] What else have we got here?
[19:50] You've got your lip liner.
[19:52] We have some lipstick.
[19:55] We...
[19:58] Oh, my favorite thing, vagina bullets.
[20:03] Bullets.
[20:05] You have probiotic caps to stick up your vagina for a healthy vaginal microbiome.
[20:12] And then you had some prescription estrogen vagina bullets too.
[20:19] And Eclipse Mints.
[20:22] And one of my kids' ADHD medication bottles in there.
[20:25] And that's about it.
[20:27] And pretty much that is an insight, guys, into Jess's beautiful mind.
[20:33] I know.
[20:33] Her handbag is a metaphor for her soul.
[20:37] Can you imagine if I was doing an interview with Vogue and I'm sitting there like, oh, what's in your handbag?
[20:42] Man, that cancels me.
[20:43] Like, this girl is nutters.
[20:46] Go, guys, my goal is am I going to be on Vogue?
[20:48] And they're going to go, what's in your handbag?
[20:50] I'm going to put the most randomest stuff.
[20:52] Fanny bullets.
[20:52] Fanny bullets.
[20:53] Anyway, team, it has been a very...
[20:59] Big start to spring.
[21:01] We are entering the most fun time to live in Australia, right?
[21:07] The next six months, seven months.
[21:08] There's so much on, especially if you're listening, come down to Melbourne, guys.
[21:13] It is such a vibe.
[21:14] There's so much good stuff on, but it also gives me a little bit of anxiety about- Oh my God, the drinking.
[21:20] The drinking, yes.
[21:22] And so what we've decided to do
[21:25] as a pair, is this weekend, no drinks.
[21:29] I do not want to see you.
[21:30] I do not want to see a bottle of rosé.
[21:31] I don't want to hear any ice machines clack, clack, clacking ice.
[21:35] I actually hope it rains all weekend.
[21:37] Oh, I don't.
[21:37] Because then that makes me want to stay inside and do nothing.
[21:39] If it's a beautiful sunny day and the birds are chirping, I'll be like, oh, rosé, let's go!
[21:43] I do not want to see you.
[21:45] I don't want to hear from you.
[21:46] I want it to rain.
[21:47] I want to be inside.
[21:49] I'm just going to live in the sauna and that's it, right?
[21:52] Because we are...
[21:55] getting all of our energy ready for Dom Dollar Week.
[21:59] Dom Dollar Week.
[22:01] Literally.
[22:01] With a bit of Kylie Minogue thrown in.
[22:03] Yeah.
[22:03] But it is Dom Fest.
[22:05] It's a Dom Fest.
[22:05] It's Dom into Dom into Dom into Dom.
[22:07] Yeah.
[22:08] Right?
[22:09] With a side of Kylie Minogue and an AFL grandfather.
[22:11] Oh, my God.
[22:11] And me flying to Korea.
[22:12] And then you're going to Korea and then I'm going to Hamilton Island.
[22:14] Yeah.
[22:15] Yeah.
[22:15] That's only in like 10 days.
[22:17] We've got a lot on.
[22:18] We literally have 10 days to sober up.
[22:21] Yes.
[22:21] But you've got so many weeks.
[22:22] So we can destroy it all.
[22:24] We can destroy it all.
[22:25] I'm just going to roll into the airport so hungover.
[22:29] Oh, good.
[22:29] I'll recover in Korea.
[22:31] Yeah, you will.
[22:31] You will.
[22:32] Are you going to come back with a new face?
[22:33] I'll probably.
[22:34] You never know.
[22:35] I'll probably have a tit on my head.
[22:36] Who knows?
[22:37] Who knows what I'm going to do?
[22:38] Replace the dick.
[22:39] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[22:40] I'm literally going to be like, I feel like...
[22:43] I'm going to do, I don't know what I'm going to do.
[22:45] There's so many things.
[22:46] I've just been like saving a whole bunch of stuff.
[22:48] I'm like, do I do the health thing?
[22:50] Do I do the beauty stuff?
[22:51] Do I just do it all?
[22:52] Do it all.
[22:53] Do it all.
[22:53] Who knows?
[22:54] I might come back not looking like me.
[22:56] How exciting.
[22:57] I know.
[22:57] Am I getting a facelift in three weeks?
[22:59] Are you?
[23:00] I don't know.
[23:00] Your ADHD brain, if you need a dopamine, this is my fear, that on the day you're going to need a dopamine hit and you just book one in and randomly do it.
[23:07] I know.
[23:07] Because that's the kind of shit you do.
[23:08] I'll just walk past that goes, buy one, get one free, and my girlfriend and I will be like, let's do this, and we will book it.
[23:14] Anyway, hopefully that's not going to be the case, guys, and I come back still looking like me.
[23:18] We'll see you then.
[23:19] Bye for now.
[23:26] Fame ish.

Shows are listed from Apple Podcasts' charts and directory, and Podcast Index where it is used. Every show and episode belongs to its publisher and plays from the publisher's own feed; this site hosts none of them.
