# New Trend: Older Women Dating Younger Men

An episode of [Vain-ish](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1824105551), 25 Aug 2026, 19 min.

Audio: https://enrichment.soundstack.com/4vjqq8/episode.flightcast.com/01M0VPQGW1JXB5EBZSWWWS9MP2.mp3

Why are more older women dating younger men? Bec and Jess hear from Vain-ish women in age-gap relationships and dig into why both sides are drawn to it. Bec surprised Jess with a sneaky birthday dinner that turned wild, so the girls spill on the night’s antics. And they share their hero affordable beauty buys of the month! Find us on Instagram: @vainishpodcast (https://www.instagram.com/vainishpodcast/?hl=en) Hosts: @becjudd (https://www.instagram.com/becjudd/?hl=en) and @jessierobertsx (https://www.instagram.com/jessierobertsx/?hl=en) Producer: Liza Altarejos Audio Imager: Chris Marsh Video Producer: Justin Hill Find more great podcasts at LiSTNR (http://www.listnr.com)

## Transcript

[0:02] a listener production.
[0:05] I'm Bec Judd.
[0:06] And I'm Jess Roberts.
[0:07] And we're done with the smoke and mirrors.
[0:09] Fainish shares honest stories about what it takes to look amazing because we did not wake up like this.
[0:15] And you should know the stuff that we chat about on this podcast is based on our personal experiences.
[0:21] We're sharing it for your entertainment.
[0:23] It's definitely not medical advice.
[0:26] And we'll always be clear with you when something is a paid endorsement.
[0:29] Please always chat with your qualified healthcare team before making any decisions about your health.
[0:49] Hi guys, it's Bec Judd and Jess Roberts and welcome to Fainish.
[0:53] Jess.
[0:54] Hello, babe.
[0:55] How are you?
[0:56] Last week, we chatted about one of our friends who's around the 40-year-old mark dating a 20-something year old and our DMs went off.
[1:08] Blew up.
[1:09] Yeah, and we asked you guys to send us in your experience of the same thing.
[1:14] And why is it such a trend now?
[1:16] We discussed things like 40-year-olds looking like 20-year-olds, 40-year-olds having more money.
[1:23] Better in bed.
[1:24] Being better in bed.
[1:26] 40-year-olds maybe not wanting the pressure of starting a family, a marriage and all that because they've already been there and done that.
[1:33] No strings of time.
[1:34] 20-year-olds wanting sugar mamas, like so many different reasons.
[1:37] Yeah.
[1:37] Yeah.
[1:38] And we asked you guys to send in your listener messages and we had some beauties.
[1:42] So let's hear what some of our fave DMers had to say.
[1:48] Hi, girls.
[1:49] I'm Rose.
[1:50] I'm such a longtime fan of you both.
[1:52] So when I was 34, I met a 24-year-old on a dating app purely to have some fun.
[1:58] And we ended up being friends with benefits for almost two years.
[2:02] But then when COVID hit, he actually ended up becoming my bubble buddy.
[2:06] And fast forward to now, we are married with two kids.
[2:10] And I also just want to say, I still look younger than my husband and would love it to stay that way.
[2:14] So please do this podcast forever.
[2:16] Thank you.
[2:19] She's been doing all the things.
[2:20] I know, all the things.
[2:21] Or she's just got good genes.
[2:23] Yeah, maybe she does.
[2:24] Isn't that cool?
[2:25] That's so cool that, you know.
[2:26] You've got kids.
[2:27] I know, friends with benefits.
[2:28] It does work out.
[2:30] Yeah, I love that.
[2:31] Yeah.
[2:32] Hi, Beck and Jess.
[2:34] I am 42 and I'm actually married to a 29-year-old man.
[2:39] He was 22 when we met and I was 34.
[2:42] I was going through a divorce at the time with three little kids, which I didn't actually tell you about initially, only just for like a day and then I got the yields and said, yeah, we've been married for four years.
[2:53] We actually have a little girl together as well.
[2:55] I literally called him Scout as a nickname for ages after we met because I was like,
[3:01] You're like my Boy Scout.
[3:04] But he's quite mature and people think that we're actually about the same age.
[3:07] Like, I guess I'm super extroverted and maybe act younger.
[3:11] Yeah, he was attracted to my confidence and independence and intelligence.
[3:14] I guess I was really attracted to his body initially and his looks and his energy.
[3:19] But yeah, he's so full of energy still, which is amazing.
[3:23] And so it works.
[3:24] We love it.
[3:25] That is so cool.
[3:26] I love to hear it.
[3:27] I love that.
[3:29] I love that all these girls are actually...
[3:31] like have babies with them and got married to them.
[3:34] Yeah, it's crazy, isn't it?
[3:35] See, they're not just, you know, no strings attached.
[3:39] Yeah.
[3:40] Hi, Beck and Jessie.
[3:41] I was listening to your Insta story the other day about 20-year-old guys who are into 40-year-old women.
[3:46] And that certainly rang true for me when I was in my early 40s, newly divorced with three kids.
[3:50] I couldn't believe how many guys on the apps were interested in women my age.
[3:54] And when I chatted to them about it, they said it's because mums are so busy and only available every second weekend.
[4:00] That appealed to a lot of them because it meant that they could still live their own lives, catch up with their mates, do what they wanted to do without the pressure of having to date all the time or even respond to messages and calls all the time because mums were always really busy with their kids.
[4:12] So for a lot of them, that was the appeal.
[4:14] Okay, thanks.
[4:16] Makes sense.
[4:17] Yeah.
[4:18] So if you just want to bang, it's like every two weeks you're available.
[4:22] And then when you've got the kids, like you're hard mumming.
[4:24] Yeah.
[4:24] And then when you don't have the kids, you're hard banging.
[4:26] Yeah.
[4:29] That's actually a really good idea.
[4:30] It's actually a really good system.
[4:33] Hey, girls.
[4:34] My name's Nairi.
[4:35] I'm a 41-year-old single mum of three kids from Sydney's Northern Beaches.
[4:39] I just wanted to let you know that my age gap with my ex-boyfriend was 13 years.
[4:47] He was 25.
[4:47] I was 38 when I met him.
[4:49] And it was a very, very fun two years that I was with him.
[4:53] But since then, I will never date someone older.
[4:56] I find younger men way more fun.
[4:58] They look good.
[4:58] They feel good.
[4:59] They can keep up.
[5:02] And it's just a vibe.
[5:04] So yeah, go young.
[5:05] I love it.
[5:06] They look good.
[5:06] They feel good.
[5:07] They can keep up.
[5:09] I love that.
[5:11] I feel like dating someone younger would...
[5:13] make you feel young internally?
[5:16] Like, you know, you just, like, I feel younger than what I am.
[5:19] Yeah.
[5:20] I know you do.
[5:21] Same.
[5:21] You look younger than you do.
[5:22] My biological age is 32.
[5:24] So technically I'm 32.
[5:26] Yeah.
[5:26] So you can date now someone like they're 10 years younger.
[5:30] No, I'm married to the love of my life.
[5:32] No, you know what I'm saying.
[5:33] And I really love him.
[5:34] I know what you mean.
[5:35] But it's like, when men get divorced, they always grow younger, right?
[5:39] So always the older men with the younger
[5:43] be the same as men.
[5:44] And it's like this big deal.
[5:44] Like, oh my God, she's dating someone younger.
[5:46] It's like, yeah, and so do they.
[5:47] Yeah.
[5:48] So yeah, get used to it.
[5:49] Get used to it.
[5:50] Yeah.
[5:51] We're only dating younger.
[6:01] All right.
[6:02] So I'm exhausted.
[6:04] I'm so tired.
[6:06] I can't stop you already.
[6:07] I've got the contagious yours.
[6:09] You can hear it coming now.
[6:10] Stop.
[6:10] Don't hate me, Yod.
[6:13] So over the weekend, Bec and my girlfriend, G, decided to throw me a sneaky surprise party.
[6:20] And of course...
[6:23] I had to go to this surprise party and then go straight into dance comms.
[6:28] Hang on.
[6:28] Hang on.
[6:29] Rewind.
[6:30] It was a sneaky dinner karaoke party that got very wild and then it was a booth.
[6:37] In electric.
[6:38] At Electric Nightclub that ended at 3 a.m. Yeah.
[6:43] I haven't done an electric night.
[6:46] And if you don't know what electric is, guys, it's this club in Melbourne on Chapel Street.
[6:51] It's quite iconic.
[6:52] Back in the day, when I was in my 20s, it was called Electric Ladyland.
[6:55] And now it's just called Electric.
[6:57] Yeah.
[6:58] And, yeah, look, I haven't been there for a long time.
[7:01] It is a lot of fun.
[7:02] But I got home at 3 a.m.
[7:04] I'd only go there for you, babe.
[7:06] I know.
[7:06] I know.
[7:07] It was fun.
[7:08] And then you had to go into Dance Fronts all day yesterday and I had a...
[7:12] I had, what did I have?
[7:13] I had a footy final.
[7:14] I had a lunch.
[7:15] I took your son with me.
[7:17] She took one of my kids.
[7:18] And then I had family dinner at my mother-in-law's.
[7:20] And I had your kid as well, mine.
[7:23] And it was the biggest day ever off like three hours sleep.
[7:26] And I am now going to be so tired all week.
[7:30] And it was totally worth it.
[7:31] It was so worth it.
[7:33] It was so fun.
[7:34] I just remember standing in the club with you and turning around and going, everyone's gone.
[7:40] Except for like four of us standing.
[7:42] And we're like, we better go.
[7:44] We better go.
[7:45] It started at 30 people and we got down to the final four.
[7:50] Always.
[7:50] Yeah, and then the last two remaining ended up going somewhere else, a place that shall not be mentioned.
[7:56] But, gosh, it was fun.
[7:57] It was so fun.
[7:58] But I am honestly too old for this shit.
[8:00] I know.
[8:02] I counted the drinks.
[8:03] I think it was like...
[8:04] Well, we saw the receipt.
[8:05] How many margaritas?
[8:06] Was it 70?
[8:07] But I had six margaritas and three tequila shots.
[8:10] Yeah.
[8:11] Myself.
[8:11] I don't even know what I drank.
[8:13] I don't know.
[8:13] I don't even know what my limit was.
[8:15] Yeah.
[8:15] We put on all the Kylie Minogue songs for you and you belted it out.
[8:18] We did.
[8:19] And then we played.
[8:20] I've got one karaoke song I sing.
[8:22] It's the only one I can sing.
[8:24] Sinead O'Connor, Nothing Compares to You.
[8:26] Oh, yes.
[8:26] So I just put it on repeat and everyone had to listen to me sing it 10 times.
[8:31] Like bad girl Becky on a mic is the best.
[8:33] Bad girl Becky does Sinead O'Connor minus the shaved head.
[8:38] But it was good.
[8:39] Girl nights are the best.
[8:40] They were.
[8:40] It's always our girls and our gays.
[8:42] Yeah.
[8:42] Yeah.
[8:43] And they just put on a party.
[8:45] And you know what?
[8:45] We could have all the guys as well, but then like the list is now 90 and no one will literally hold 90 of us.
[8:50] You have to hold like the entire venue.
[8:53] Yes.
[8:53] It ends up becoming too big.
[8:55] Yeah.
[8:55] So when we have the guys, that's usually a house party.
[8:57] Yeah.
[8:58] I know when it's just the girls.
[8:59] That's what we'll do next time.
[9:00] Yeah, next time.
[9:01] Because your last house party was the Barbie party.
[9:03] Yeah.
[9:04] And that was iconic.
[9:05] That was iconic.
[9:07] My 30th birthday.
[9:08] That's what the Daily Mail wrote.
[9:09] I love it.
[9:10] Because it was not.
[9:12] It was a few years older, but we'll run with 30th.
[9:14] Yeah, yeah.
[9:15] And the funny thing was, you know, like when you're at a party and you need to ghost, so you need to like try and escape.
[9:23] And you feel bad, but you don't want to do the rounds and say goodbye to everyone because then they're like, just stay, stay a little bit longer, have one more drink.
[9:32] So you try and ghost.
[9:32] So at that Barbie party, remember Lauren Phillips ghosted and as she was trying to sneak out of your house, she tripped over and broke her wrist.
[9:40] That's what happens when you ghost.
[9:42] That's karma for ghosting.
[9:43] Do you know what the thing is?
[9:45] At Barbie, I actually ghosted my own party.
[9:47] I went upstairs and went to bed.
[9:48] Went to bed.
[9:48] I left everyone downstairs.
[9:50] I think it was like two o'clock and I was like, I'm done.
[9:53] Yeah.
[9:53] I think I thought, you know what, I'm just going to have like a lie down for five seconds because I...
[9:56] I drank so much.
[9:57] The room was spitting.
[9:58] I passed out.
[9:59] I fell asleep.
[10:00] I came down about three or four hours later and there was still people in my house.
[10:03] And I was like, are you guys going to go home?
[10:06] Like, no, not yet.
[10:07] Just a few more hours.
[10:08] I'm like, okay, I'm going to go back to bed.
[10:11] Just turn down the music a little.
[10:12] People are crazy.
[10:14] I did go to my own party that night.
[10:15] I went straight to bed and left everyone keep going.
[10:18] I tried to ghost my own wedding and then Chris wouldn't let me.
[10:21] You were pregnant too.
[10:23] I know.
[10:23] I was like, can we wrap this shit up?
[10:24] I need to go to bed.
[10:25] I'm tired and pregnant.
[10:26] It was like 11 p.m.
[10:27] He's like, babe, it's New Year's Eve.
[10:28] We've got fireworks.
[10:29] We've booked the venue till 2 a.m. You can't ghost your own wedding.
[10:33] I'm like, well, I need to go for a nap.
[10:35] And this is really boring without alcohol.
[10:39] You look great, though.
[10:40] I looked great.
[10:41] You looked great.
[10:41] I wasn't messy.
[10:42] You weren't messy.
[10:43] I know.
[10:43] The bloody hair needed a brush out, though.
[10:44] You know when you look back at photos and you're like, shit.
[10:48] Needed a lip liner.
[10:49] Needed some contour.
[10:50] Especially the year that we got married.
[10:52] I like, we both, actually you were smoking, but I look at mine and gone, I should have just waited a few more years when I had Instagram and Pinterest so I could actually have a mood board because I just opened up a magazine in a cell and I was like, oh yeah, that would do.
[11:03] Yeah, well that's what we used to do, right?
[11:05] Yeah, yes.
[11:05] I literally chose my wedding dress, my jeton one, from opening, I think it was Harper's or Vogue.
[11:09] And I saw an ad and I was like, oh my God, that's the dress, boom.
[11:12] Yeah.
[11:12] Then met jeton.
[11:13] Well, at least it was jeton.
[11:15] I just chose a dress, don't even know what the brand was.
[11:19] My veil cost more than my dress.
[11:20] My dress was like, I think it was like two grand.
[11:22] Yeah, wow.
[11:23] And my veil was like, I think it was like $800 per metre.
[11:27] My veil was more expensive than my dress.
[11:30] Anyway.
[11:31] Oh, my God.
[11:31] Less alert.
[11:32] And I just, yeah, look back at the photos.
[11:34] No lip liner.
[11:35] Mm-hmm.
[11:36] eyebrows too thin and tongued the hair and didn't brush them out.
[11:41] I had a wig.
[11:42] But I remember at the time, we had about a meter sewn in, I remember at the time thinking it was the hottest I'd ever looked in my life.
[11:49] And now I look back and I'm like, what the fuck?
[11:52] No, I still think you looked amazing.
[11:54] Yeah, iconic.
[11:55] Just needed a good hairbrush.
[11:57] Yeah.
[11:58] Maybe we should do it again.
[11:59] I was going to say 10-year wedding, vow renewal.
[12:02] Hang on, I think I'm like... Like 16 years or something.
[12:04] I'm to 20 years now.
[12:05] Yeah, yeah.
[12:06] No, I just can't do that anymore.
[12:07] I feel like your husband, vow, would be into vow renewal because he's like really deep like that.
[12:13] I know, and he's so romantic.
[12:15] Yeah, and if I pitched it to my husband, he would be like...
[12:18] fuck right off.
[12:19] I know Val would do it every year if he could.
[12:22] Marry me again and again.
[12:23] He worships you.
[12:24] I know I worship him too.
[12:25] It's cute.
[12:26] It's like 15 years of marriage and we still love each other.
[12:29] So nice.
[12:39] Alright, so just before we go, we're going to check out our DMs to see who's written in.
[12:42] Hey, girls.
[12:43] Robin here.
[12:44] Love the show.
[12:45] I just want to know what's been your hero affordable beauty buy for this month.
[12:50] Love you.
[12:50] Bye.
[12:51] Ooh.
[12:51] Ooh.
[12:53] Candy clothes.
[12:54] Ha, ha, ha, ha.
[12:57] It actually would be.
[12:58] Do you know what my hero buy, but I didn't buy it because they're my partner's candy claws nails.
[13:03] Because I don't have to go and sit in the nail salon anymore with all the dust and all the acrylic stuff and it gives me dermatitis and you can just whack them on and whack them off and they're like $35 a pair and they have really good sales as well.
[13:16] So watch out for that.
[13:18] But yeah, disclaimer, I do work with them, but it has been an absolute game changer and I don't think I'll ever sit in a nail salon anymore.
[13:26] And there's so many different designs, lengths, shapes.
[13:29] You can glue them on.
[13:30] You can stick them on with stickers for a shorter wear.
[13:33] Been a game changer.
[13:35] I actually took my nails off this week to do the candy claws, but I ran out of time.
[13:39] I ran out of time.
[13:40] Even though it only takes five minutes.
[13:41] I know.
[13:42] I literally had like two minutes.
[13:43] Yeah, anyway.
[13:44] But I've got them in my bag.
[13:46] I will do them at roundabout school pickup.
[13:48] But yeah, I just can't sit in the salon.
[13:50] It's like an hour.
[13:51] And you can't use your fingers.
[13:53] Yes.
[13:53] I'm like, I can be doing so much things with my time than sitting there.
[13:57] Yeah.
[13:58] Anyway.
[13:58] Yeah.
[13:58] I agree.
[13:58] I always preload Netflix, take my earbuds in.
[14:02] And then I've been watching Outlander.
[14:05] This is when I was going to the nail salon, right?
[14:07] So I'll pop Outlander on.
[14:09] And it's like so rude.
[14:10] There's so much sex in it.
[14:12] So even though it's in my ears, because I have to put the screen there where they're drawing my fingers, they must just think like I'm addicted to porn or something.
[14:18] You can't get it anymore.
[14:21] You've got to put your details in for the new regulations.
[14:25] Do you really?
[14:27] Yeah, you can't get Pornhub anymore.
[14:29] Stop.
[14:29] Or any of those porn sites.
[14:30] What are they called?
[14:31] Yeah, you've got to, there's some new regulations where you have to prove that you're over 18 and put all your details in.
[14:37] It's like a government thing.
[14:38] Is it?
[14:38] Yeah.
[14:38] And then what?
[14:39] And then it gets like notified on your- So it's really good for you, like your kids can't access it anymore.
[14:42] That's actually a really good idea.
[14:43] I'm sure there's ways though.
[14:44] Yeah.
[14:45] I said it to my husband and my husband's like, nah, no way around it.
[14:47] Yeah.
[14:49] I think all the men do.
[14:52] As mine has to be, I actually just, I've actually got it on my face at the moment.
[14:56] It's called Cell Fusion C. I got a tas.
[14:58] What is it?
[14:59] Cell Fusion C. It's a Korean BB cream.
[15:03] Oh.
[15:03] And this influencer from America had it on and she puts it on in her car.
[15:08] And it just, I don't know, I feel like I look great.
[15:10] You always look great.
[15:11] You look great.
[15:12] I don't know, but it's like really hydrating.
[15:15] It's a BB cream.
[15:16] It's called the Skin Blemish Balm Intensive.
[15:18] And what does it actually do?
[15:20] I don't know.
[15:20] It just looked great on her.
[15:22] So I just, I don't read the fine print.
[15:23] I'm like, done.
[15:24] She looks hot.
[15:25] Yeah, I want to look like her.
[15:27] So I bought that and really like her.
[15:29] Do you know what I want to ask you about is I saw on your Instagram people were asking you about this headband that you're wearing.
[15:35] Oh, yeah.
[15:36] And I feel like in the 90s, we all used to wear them the wire headbands.
[15:40] The claw.
[15:41] The claw.
[15:41] And yours is a bit thicker.
[15:42] I feel like this is a 2026 reinterpretation of this wire headband.
[15:46] People were like, where'd you get it?
[15:47] Where'd you get it?
[15:48] So explain what you're wearing and where you got it.
[15:50] Okay.
[15:50] So I'm wearing a claw headband.
[15:52] I think in the 90s, they were actually in plastic.
[15:54] And you can still get them in plastic now.
[15:56] I had a wire one.
[15:57] Oh, you had a wire one?
[15:58] A black wire one, yeah.
[15:59] Oh, yes.
[15:59] But always the teeth on it would like bend.
[16:02] Yes.
[16:02] Or get caught in your hair.
[16:03] And the paint would come off the black and then it would be like silver metal underneath.
[16:07] Yes.
[16:07] Yeah.
[16:08] Anyway, so I've got a almost like, I can't even see what it looks like on my head.
[16:12] What does it look like?
[16:13] It's like twisted.
[16:13] Like a twisty.
[16:15] Twisty plastic.
[16:17] Metal.
[16:18] Metal.
[16:19] Grabby claw-y thing.
[16:20] Yeah.
[16:20] Yeah.
[16:20] And where'd you get it?
[16:21] Timu.
[16:22] Timu.
[16:22] Timo, of course.
[16:23] Did I even have to ask?
[16:24] Yeah.
[16:24] P.S.
[16:25] Why don't Timo sponsor this show?
[16:26] I know, right?
[16:28] I know.
[16:28] If you're listening to Ni Hao, sponsor us.
[16:31] We love you.
[16:31] I actually really want to go to China.
[16:33] I used to go heaps back in the day.
[16:35] I reckon I've been to China like 30 times.
[16:37] Yeah.
[16:38] And my algorithm, it's algorithming hard on China.
[16:42] Like some of the places... Oh, my God.
[16:43] That big shopping center that you can literally build a whole house in.
[16:46] Yeah, and it's so clean and it's so safe there.
[16:49] I know.
[16:49] I was in China last year.
[16:50] And like, cool.
[16:51] It's just...
[16:52] cool stuff.
[16:54] I think... Should we go to China?
[16:55] I just want to go back.
[16:56] I haven't been for 20 years and, yeah, I would love to go to China.
[17:01] I'm desperate to go to Shanghai.
[17:04] Steve and Michelle, who we own Jagged with, they go a lot because a lot of our factories are over there and the stuff that they post and the things that they see in the restaurants and the bar scene and everything is so cool.
[17:17] I think Vanya should go there.
[17:19] Yeah, we should.
[17:19] Because you know what I've been at Targeted is actually...
[17:22] all the plastic surgery that's being done over there.
[17:24] So it was all Korea.
[17:25] Now I'm getting all China.
[17:28] I'm getting Thailand.
[17:29] Oh, yes.
[17:30] I have a little bit of that.
[17:31] A little bit of Thailand.
[17:31] Because they were doing it all before everyone else.
[17:34] Because of all the lady boys there.
[17:36] There's such a culture there.
[17:37] When I was living there, so many beautiful lady boys who you would never know were born biological males.
[17:45] They're stunning.
[17:46] They're stunning.
[17:46] They are.
[17:47] Stunning.
[17:47] So they've been doing it for so long.
[17:49] And if you ever want a perfect fanny, that's where you go.
[17:51] to get it done.
[17:52] Well, no.
[17:52] Well, think about it.
[17:53] They do all the ladyboys and they, like, apparently look amazing and you wouldn't even know.
[17:58] Really?
[17:59] So imagine being a girl and you just want to tidy up.
[18:01] I feel like Thailand is the place to go.
[18:04] It'll be cheap.
[18:05] We're going everywhere.
[18:06] We're going to Thailand, China, Korea.
[18:07] We're doing all of Asia.
[18:11] Okay, guys, keep your DMs flowing in.
[18:14] We love it.
[18:15] It always leads to us, like, going off in some unhinged chat and have a good yap, but it all starts with your DMs.
[18:24] So send them in.
[18:25] Keep them coming.
[18:26] Bye for now.
[18:27] Bye.

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