# Discipleship in Dating

An episode of [AfterMass](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1823710125), 23 Sep 2025, 37 min.

Audio: https://anchor.fm/s/1069762b8/podcast/play/108680665/https%3A%2F%2Fd3ctxlq1ktw2nl.cloudfront.net%2Fstaging%2F2025-8-23%2F407971379-44100-2-205df3be108a3.mp3

In this episode of AfterMass, I sit down with Taylor O’Brien, the CEO and founder of Candid Dating - a bold new movement helping singles approach dating with honesty, intentionality and faith. Taylor shares her story, what inspired her to start Candid Dating and how she’s helping reshape the way people approach relationships today. Taylor is not only building a community, she’s also launching the official Candid Dating app at the end of September; a platform designed to connect singles in a refreshing and Christ-centered way. Learn more and get connected at candiddating.net and check out their socials @candid_dating. 💌 Have a story, question or reaction to this episode? I’d love to hear from you. Email me at theaftermasspodcast@gmail.com. ✨ Want to grow deeper in your Catholic faith? Sign up at bit.ly/anaXtruthly and use code AFTERMASS to get 30 days free. This episode is sponsored by Truthly - a Catholic app helping you learn, live, and share your faith with confidence.

## Transcript

[0:00] Hi, friends, and welcome back to Aftermath, the podcast for
[0:02] Catholics who want more than just faith on Sundays.
[0:05] I'm your host, Anna, and today we're diving into something that
[0:08] touches just about everyone at some point in their lives, which
[0:11] is dating. What does it really mean to
[0:14] follow Christ while seeking love in a world where dating often
[0:18] feels really shallow and even hopeless?
[0:21] How do we bring discipleship into the way that we pursue
[0:25] relationships? To help explore this, I'm joined
[0:33] by Taylor O'Brien, who is the CEO and Co founder of Candid
[0:37] Dating. Hired of the swipe culture,
[0:39] Taylor began hosting Catholic speed dating events that grew
[0:43] into this digital platform designed for authentic and faith
[0:47] filled relationships. And Candid officially launched
[0:50] in 2024 with some virtual speed dates.
[0:53] And now they are preparing to roll out the full app and just a
[0:56] couple weeks here. So, you know, it has new
[0:59] features like weekly matches and in app video calls.
[1:02] So welcome to the show, Taylor. Thank you so much for coming on
[1:06] and talking to us about everything that has to do with
[1:09] dating and discipleship and everything like that.
[1:12] So welcome. Thank you.
[1:13] Thank you for having me. What an intro.
[1:15] That was lovely. Thank you.
[1:17] Thanks. We're really professional over
[1:18] here. It's great.
[1:19] No, it's great. Thank you for having me.
[1:21] So before we get into, I want to get into a little bit of kind of
[1:24] like your story and the mission. What inspired you to start
[1:26] candid? But before we do, you know, one
[1:28] of the most asked questions that I get from my audience is how
[1:33] did you find such a nice Catholic man, such a devout
[1:36] Catholic man? And it's so ironic because when
[1:40] we met, we were both raised Catholic.
[1:42] So we were Catholic, but not practicing.
[1:44] And so it's just a miracle through the grace of God that we
[1:48] have both kind of simultaneously gotten to this point.
[1:51] But so I never have any dating advice.
[1:54] I don't, you know, I know the culture I was a part of the
[1:56] Bumble and Tinder and all of that swipe culture that's
[2:00] actually we met. So, you know, not to knock them
[2:03] too much, but it's so important today to when you are dating
[2:08] that you're living that discipleship through dating and
[2:12] that you can, you can really find different avenues of
[2:14] meeting the right people and maybe not the right people for
[2:17] marriage at all times. Of course, we go through the
[2:20] yeses and the Nos, but it's so important that we have resources
[2:23] like candidating. I would have used candidating
[2:25] back then, you know, So yeah, I'm just, I'm just really
[2:29] excited. This sounds like an amazing
[2:30] resource. So, you know, I just wanted to
[2:32] kind of start from the beginning.
[2:33] What kind of inspired you to start Candid?
[2:36] Yeah, and what you said too, like, I think it's awesome that
[2:40] that's how you and your husband met.
[2:41] And praise God, there's so many people with stories just like
[2:43] yours. Yeah.
[2:44] And candid actually started, I guess we can just like get right
[2:48] into it ended an engagement back and I guess it was like it was
[2:54] before COVID. And the Lord really did a lot
[2:58] with my heart after that. I was, it was a miserable time
[3:01] for me. I don't wish that kind of pain
[3:03] or suffering on anyone. But it was, looking back, the
[3:06] most beautiful time that I've spent with our Lord just at the
[3:10] foot of the cross because there was really no other place to be.
[3:13] I was, you know, I guess to kind of like let any of your
[3:18] listeners know that I've been maybe where they are, maybe in a
[3:22] worse place than they are. Maybe they're just like, well,
[3:24] that it's not it's not that deep yet.
[3:26] Like I haven't gotten there yet. Yeah.
[3:27] But something that we always joke about my Co founder and I
[3:30] is like, the further we get into candid, the more we're like, I
[3:34] hope people understand that like this was really born out of like
[3:37] a pain point that we both had. So I, yeah, into that
[3:42] engagement. And I was just in a, in a place
[3:44] of suffering. And I said, Lord, OK, clearly I
[3:48] thought I knew what like my life was going to look like what you
[3:51] wanted from me, that you said no to that and like, praise God for
[3:55] that. But now what?
[3:56] Like now how do I do this? How do I enter back into the
[3:59] dating game, if you will? I had a lot of fears and
[4:03] insecurities, especially coming out of that situation.
[4:05] And and I was like, just lead me through this.
[4:10] Like whatever the rest of my life looks like now, I literally
[4:12] have no template. I don't have a clue what to do.
[4:14] So you just like lead me through this and I got back and onto the
[4:18] apps just because there was no other place to go.
[4:20] I mean, dating in the wild, as they say.
[4:22] I was kind of doing that. But you know, you, you want to
[4:25] try everything. You don't want to leave a stone
[4:26] unturned. And so I got on the apps and I
[4:31] just thought, you know, this is great that this exists, but I
[4:37] didn't feel like it was right for me.
[4:39] You know, like, I, I think the longer that the apps, the
[4:44] swiping UPS kind of perpetuate, Big Tech has found a really
[4:49] exact formula on the ways to prey on our insecurities, both
[4:53] as male and female. They've really mastered the
[4:56] formula. And I didn't like feeling like I
[4:58] was a product of that, you know, like I didn't feel feeling like
[5:01] they had figured me out and knew how to keep me on those apps.
[5:04] Yeah. And so one thing I did was I
[5:08] started an online community, it's called Canaan Communion,
[5:11] But I really want to just meet other Catholic women that I had
[5:13] never really had the chance to connect with who were maybe
[5:15] walking in the same season that I was.
[5:17] Either they could go through a breakup or they were struggling
[5:19] with dating and kind of see like what would come out of that.
[5:22] And again, I was just like, Lord, I don't even really like
[5:25] taking photos. I don't, I like to write.
[5:27] I like to write. But starting an Instagram
[5:29] account was just like, not something that I would ever,
[5:31] ever do. But it was so fruitful.
[5:34] And I started hosting meetups here in like the DFW area where
[5:37] I live. And online, we did like a
[5:40] virtual Thanksgiving dinner thing one time.
[5:42] But some things that, yeah, something that everyone was
[5:46] talking about was dating and how it was so hard.
[5:48] And then the more engagement, I guess you could say I got, the
[5:52] more males started finding my page.
[5:53] And they were like, hey, see you with all these women.
[5:55] Like, who's your friend? Hey, that girl there.
[5:58] And I've introduced this. I love this.
[5:59] Like, this is great. This is what I want.
[6:01] Yeah. So it was still kind of Covad
[6:03] times. And I was like, let's just put
[6:05] everyone in a room together and introduce one to the other
[6:07] because it was doozy on both ends.
[6:09] Like the women were like, there are no Catholic men.
[6:11] They do not exist. Like, and if they do exist, like
[6:14] it's an awkward encounter at my parish, like whatever is
[6:18] scheduled. And then the guys were like,
[6:20] there are no women around me. I live in a town where like, I'm
[6:23] like stranded out here. Yeah, and I was.
[6:25] Just like I don't believe you because now I see both of you
[6:27] right? Like.
[6:28] You're a liar. Yes, Yeah.
[6:30] Like it exists, which is so, like, great news for everyone.
[6:34] So yeah, I found this website that was not supposed to be a
[6:37] dating site at all. It was actually like a
[6:39] networking site that got built during COVID that allowed people
[6:42] to meet virtually. And I snuck in.
[6:46] I was running football OPS at high school at the time.
[6:48] So I snuck in into the computer lab and I set up like, this row
[6:53] of computers and just hosted a speed dating event.
[6:55] And it allowed people to like I grouped them by age, region,
[7:00] interests, like, you know, my parents kitchen table.
[7:03] They signed up through a Google doc and that what they said was
[7:07] they really liked being able to talk face to face.
[7:09] And I was like, I love that because I too like have found
[7:13] some like issues with the swiping and like just the way as
[7:16] the, you know, the further on it goes, the more fine with it.
[7:20] And so I hosted it three times. People kept saying like either
[7:25] they got put on a wait list, which was crazy to me that we
[7:27] were able to have a wait list or they wanted to do it again.
[7:32] And so I was like, I can't keep doing this the way the way that
[7:36] I'm doing it. So my friend, actually my Co
[7:39] founder and her husband met through this process.
[7:43] And they're married now, right? They're married now.
[7:45] That's they. Talk about like a It really
[7:48] works. You know, Princess of the
[7:49] Pudding there. Yeah, totally.
[7:51] It's like totally a God thing, obviously.
[7:54] But yeah, he had a team of developers and he was like, if
[7:58] you want to build this so you don't have to keep doing it the
[7:59] way that you're doing it, like go for it.
[8:01] And so we did. We were like, we have no tech
[8:03] experience and no clue. But all I knew was that if the
[8:06] Lord wanted this to exist, he would open doors, which he has.
[8:09] And we could go like, that's a whole other podcast in itself of
[8:11] just like the last few years and how he's given us every step in
[8:15] guiding us. And then also just, it's shown
[8:19] us that people really do crave conversation and connection.
[8:22] And like we were made in a certain way.
[8:24] We were made for authentic connection and to see the person
[8:29] behind the screen as a real person and to hear a laugh and
[8:32] to see a smile and interact with each other.
[8:34] And so that is really what comes through.
[8:37] I think the most with Candid is that it gives you the
[8:39] opportunity to experience the human behind the photo and
[8:43] whether or not that means that you want to see them, see them
[8:46] again. It is what it is, but it kind of
[8:49] brings back the humanity to these encounters that we're
[8:52] having online. Yeah, and.
[8:54] You know, being someone who used these dating apps and you know,
[8:58] it's, it's, it's almost a little dehumanizing to, you know,
[9:02] people are rejecting you and the good thing is you don't really
[9:05] know if they're rejecting you left and whatever, But it's
[9:09] like, it's that thought in your head.
[9:10] OK, let me put my best pictures, my best foot forward.
[9:12] And that's great. We should all want to do that.
[9:14] First impressions are great and you know, important, but to
[9:17] really kind of minimize who I am as a person to 1 singular
[9:20] picture, whether or not you are attracted to that picture, just
[9:23] kind of, you know, the, the dignity of a human kind of gets
[9:26] lost in all of that. So I love that, you know, what
[9:29] you're really fixing on is that not, you know, that personal
[9:34] connection, that video connection because it's
[9:36] intertwining that need for a face to face conversation, which
[9:39] then can lead to a personal in person conversation.
[9:43] But you're also utilizing technology in, you know, the
[9:46] best way possible, which I think is very important too, because
[9:49] we technology is a part of our society.
[9:51] It's a part of like our everyday lives.
[9:53] So if we ignore that, we know we can lose out on a lot of the
[9:56] benefits of it. So I think that's that's so
[9:59] great. Has there been a surprise?
[10:04] You know, like what's been the biggest surprise since
[10:06] launching, whether it's been how many people are interested or,
[10:09] you know, any success stories like that?
[10:11] You know, I don't know if there was like a moment where you're
[10:13] like, Oh my gosh, like this is just insane.
[10:16] This is crazy. Yeah.
[10:18] Thank you there. And there's so many different
[10:20] ways I could go with this. I think one thing that was
[10:24] exciting to us a was just the response that we got, like
[10:27] people really enjoying the product.
[10:30] What was fun about Candid was that from that original group
[10:33] that we hosted, the 400 people that signed up the first time,
[10:36] just like from my Google doc. Which is crazy, by the way, just
[10:39] to have 400 people. Insane.
[10:41] Totally insane. But they built this with us, so
[10:46] we were able to get their feedback the entire time and
[10:49] really make sure that like, are we building this because we're
[10:52] building it, you know, over here, just building it, which
[10:55] no, because again, that is not our background or like
[10:58] expertise. Or are we giving them something
[11:01] that they're really asking for that genuinely they feel like is
[11:04] a helpful tool? I think one of my favorite
[11:06] things about Candid is it's kind of multifaceted.
[11:10] The response that we get is either I met someone.
[11:12] Thank you or I was able to talk to someone that I wouldn't have
[11:16] picked out of a crowd like we got from our the beta, one of
[11:19] the beta testers that's testing our app, which we can get to.
[11:23] He said, you introduced me to someone who I may not have met
[11:27] otherwise. And she was really great.
[11:29] And I'm so thankful that I was able, you know, had the
[11:31] opportunity to meet her. And I love that because if you
[11:34] were to ask me like down to the like really honest detail what
[11:40] my desire for this is, it's like I want to rewire the way that
[11:42] everyone sees dating and like rewire our brains to instead
[11:46] instinctually go to conversation and into encounter first, right?
[11:51] Instead of the like digital photograph type connections.
[11:56] And so that was a win for us there.
[12:00] I think that's great. So that and then also people
[12:03] saying that they enjoyed just being able to work on their
[12:06] conversation skills. Like maybe they had been under
[12:08] the dating game and they were getting back in and they were
[12:11] nervous. But we gave them a platform
[12:13] where they knew they were going to be someone who shared their
[12:15] faith, their worldview, that was looking for the same thing that
[12:17] they were looking for, and they could come in just like with a
[12:20] little bit of pressure off. Yeah, and that's, that's huge.
[12:24] You know, someone as someone who was divorced, you know, I was
[12:28] previously married for about four years and that's not that
[12:30] long of a time. But when you go from being
[12:33] married for four years to then you go right back to being
[12:36] single. That's why I went right onto the
[12:38] apps and I was OK. So like, how do I meet guys?
[12:41] And, you know, everyone around me, Oh, Snapchat and Tinder and
[12:44] this, I'm like, OK, like let's try that.
[12:46] And it's just, it's very surface level.
[12:49] So for everybody listening, I, you know, if, if no one has
[12:52] heard of Candace, if they have no idea what, you know, how to
[12:56] even start. So what does it look like?
[12:57] You sign up? Yeah.
[12:58] And you create a profile or kind of walk us through that process
[13:01] and what they can expect on their end.
[13:03] Yeah, you can go to candidating.net and then you
[13:06] create an account. Soon you'll be able to download
[13:09] the app. But when you create an account,
[13:11] you answer a series of onboarding questions, OK.
[13:13] And then once your account is approved by one of our team
[13:15] members, you were able to see a list of events that you could
[13:18] sign up for, that we'd introduce you to people who would be
[13:21] compatible to you, either by region.
[13:24] If you sign up for one of our cross country events, we call it
[13:27] like our Open to All events. Oh, that's actually.
[13:29] Very popular. You're matched with people
[13:33] inside of that event that are close, either close to you in
[13:36] region, age or interest based on the feedback that you gave us
[13:40] whenever you did your onboarding.
[13:42] And so you can sign up for one of those events and you meet
[13:46] five to seven single Catholics for five to seven minutes at a
[13:48] time. And then after each encounter,
[13:51] you can decide if you'd like to continue the conversation and
[13:53] you're able to match and chat if both parties say yes.
[13:57] What's different about the app is when you download the app and
[14:00] do the same thing, you answer the questions.
[14:03] You are able to sign up for our events.
[14:06] So any of the events like the ones that I just mentioned, but
[14:09] then we will also serve you curated matches each week of
[14:12] people who based on what we know about them, think, we think that
[14:16] you 2 might have something in common or that you might hit it
[14:18] off. And then you're able to chat a
[14:23] little bit in the app, but you can also jump straight to a
[14:26] one-on-one call. So instead of one thing, the
[14:28] biggest complaint that we got about the apps, like the
[14:30] traditional secular apps, is that you can message back and
[14:33] forth for days on end without intention of getting off the
[14:36] app. The ladies are like, I don't
[14:38] know if he, like, just is wasting time.
[14:41] If he likes me, he doesn't want. And then guys, same thing.
[14:43] Is she just looking for attention or is she entertaining
[14:46] me or like, is she really interested?
[14:49] Yeah. And so we're solving that by
[14:51] giving you an opportunity to hop on a call.
[14:53] You don't have to exchange information.
[14:55] You can just encounter each other for a quick 5 minutes.
[14:59] And then if you enjoy the conversation, that is totally on
[15:02] you, right. We're just here to make the
[15:04] intros. No, and I, I, I love that, you
[15:06] know, ultimately your goal is to get people off the app.
[15:09] It's not it's like drawing you back in.
[15:10] Like I remember when I was using the traditional secular ones,
[15:13] it'd be like, hey, you didn't swipe today.
[15:16] Hey, you've got some super likes and it's like.
[15:19] Oh. Someone super liked me, you
[15:21] know, and it's into that whole like, wow, someone really liked
[15:24] me. It's like, but they don't know
[15:26] you. They just they saw what they
[15:27] they liked what they saw and it's just, you know, it goes
[15:30] back to our first point. But OK, so that's great.
[15:32] And I did have since I'm obviously I haven't used your I
[15:37] haven't used candid as I'm married, but so this is an
[15:41] option for people. I'm trying to just get a full
[15:44] grasp on it for our audience listening.
[15:46] If someone is located in middle of nowhere, you know, a little
[15:50] town in Nebraska, let's say, and there aren't any events that
[15:53] they can either go to that are the open for all across the
[15:56] country type thing or any regional ones.
[15:58] Do they still have options to meet people who are like minded,
[16:01] who, you know, share a lot of the same values that you guys
[16:04] can curate those matches for them?
[16:05] And then if so, you know, then I guess that that's also
[16:09] differentiating factor between the traditional apps that kind
[16:12] of just show you people right around you versus also
[16:15] facilitating meetings of, you know, from people from all
[16:18] across the country who ultimately the most important
[16:20] thing is it where you live? It's, you know, a lot of people
[16:23] work remote so they can move if they meet, you know, the right
[16:25] person. So yeah.
[16:27] So is that available for people who aren't in these regions or
[16:30] the big cities are able to go to these big events?
[16:33] Yeah, absolutely. Since all of our events are
[16:35] virtual and they're all held right there on the app, you can,
[16:39] to your point, hop on to any event that you see fit.
[16:42] So. You have two, so you have in
[16:44] person because I know you guys were also at.
[16:45] Yeah. And we do some in person events.
[16:47] OK. So it's a combination of both,
[16:49] which is so great. OK, Yeah.
[16:52] And then yes, our events on the app will all be held right there
[16:56] on the app. And so they can jump on there.
[17:00] But if to your point, if they don't feel like, you know, the
[17:02] region is suitable for them or they're not willing to meet
[17:07] someone long distance, which we can touch on that in a second,
[17:10] then yeah, you'll we'll serve you matches and you can use the
[17:13] app that way. Oh, that's wonderful.
[17:14] OK, great. I just wanted to paint kind of
[17:16] like the full paper. But and just for the record,
[17:19] since we did talk about the long distance thing, I think we just
[17:23] have to be really realistic and like really real with ourselves
[17:27] in what we want. And if we want a Catholic spouse
[17:31] and we want somebody who shares our our worldview, and that's
[17:36] like more important to you than location, then I think sometimes
[17:39] people don't like to hear. But you are going to have to
[17:41] open your horizons a little bit and be willing to look in places
[17:45] that maybe, you know, we don't have the luxury of maybe what
[17:49] the secular singles have in the fact that they don't have maybe
[17:54] a strict of AI don't want to say list because I don't support the
[17:58] lists either. But you know, like.
[18:01] Standards almost, you know, the standards are a little bit, they
[18:03] shift with. You know, totally, yeah.
[18:06] And so as our pool gets smaller, which now it's starting to get
[18:08] bigger, which is great as people are coming to the faith, but
[18:11] just be real with yourselves. And I mean, I had to do the same
[18:15] thing. And I'm sure you would say the
[18:16] same thing. Like once you meet the person
[18:18] that you are supposed to spend the rest of your life with, you
[18:21] literally don't care where they live.
[18:22] Yeah, I could. I would have followed my husband
[18:25] wherever I know I've gone or wherever if I knew it meant I
[18:28] was going to end up with him. So yeah, yeah.
[18:30] I'm just like, keep that front of mine too.
[18:32] Yeah, no, my husband and I, we, we met in Pennsylvania and we,
[18:36] we now live in Florida. And, you know, we it was his job
[18:40] that moved us down here. But yeah, I would have followed
[18:42] him to the ends of the earth because, you know, it's just
[18:45] what matters. Does it matter that we live in
[18:47] Pennsylvania or does it matter that I live in Pennsylvania with
[18:50] him and have our family? So I think that's that's great.
[18:53] And I think it's very, it's a refreshing take to have that you
[18:58] have to be honest with yourself. You have to be honest not even
[19:01] in you know your beliefs and your morals and all of these
[19:03] things, but be realistic with yourself.
[19:05] Because if there was a nice Catholic man down the street,
[19:09] you probably would have met by now.
[19:11] Your path might have crossed. So you do have to kind of open
[19:13] up, you know, your your mind a little bit and with an open
[19:17] heart, of course. But so I wanted to talk a little
[19:20] bit about kind of like discipleship and dating and what
[19:24] your view is on like, how does, how does following Christ shape
[19:29] dating? You know, how does following him
[19:31] practically shape dating? And if you have any kind of
[19:34] thoughts about that, because I just, you know, I feel like
[19:36] dating is a form of discernment. And I feel like especially in
[19:40] more more traditional conservative circles, the
[19:45] Catholic, you know, the Catholic circles, it they take dating
[19:48] very seriously from the jump from the, you know, the first
[19:52] conversations like, well, I want to marry him.
[19:55] It's like, well, that's not really realistic either.
[19:58] So I didn't know if he had any thoughts to share about, you
[20:00] know, how how it kind of looks like in the day-to-day,
[20:03] practically following. Yeah.
[20:04] So. Yeah, absolutely.
[20:06] I think to your point, we saw this a lot with Sikh.
[20:08] We had a great time at Sikh last year.
[20:10] Everyone was awesome. Like that's the most fun for us
[20:12] when we can do those in person events and really meet everyone
[20:16] We're serving. Lights a fire for sure.
[20:19] But we got a lot of that either 1 into the spectrum of I don't
[20:25] need to have any conversations because I'll know my husband or
[20:27] wife whenever they come up and like whenever I see them and
[20:32] then I'll start my life then, which is I do not recommend that
[20:36] way thinking. And then the other side is what
[20:38] you just said is like, oh, I talked to someone and like, he's
[20:41] the one. That's not it.
[20:43] And yeah, I think too age gives a little bit of perspective here
[20:47] too, because I could totally see myself maybe in college, like
[20:49] meeting a cute Catholic guy. I mean, like, is that him?
[20:52] That's the one. So like, I totally get it.
[20:54] But I think again, it's just being real with yourself and
[20:57] checking yourself. Discernment is, I agree,
[21:01] discernment and dating go hand in hand and successful
[21:04] discernment out of a relationship is just as
[21:07] glorifying, if you will, as discerning in because they're
[21:11] both decisions that have to be made.
[21:13] But I think that what you pointed out about the pressure,
[21:18] that was one thing back in the beginning that I really saw and
[21:22] I wanted to help make dating fun.
[21:23] Dating should be fun. I think this like kind of aura,
[21:29] if you will, around it, like the pressure's on.
[21:33] I have to like make sure that I meet someone, wear a prayer
[21:37] life's aligned and that like we're praying the same novenas
[21:40] and like he or she like prays the rosary as many times a day
[21:43] as I do. But then also what if that what
[21:48] if I'm not really attracted to them or like don't think that
[21:51] they're cute or whatever. Like it has to be all the
[21:55] things, right? Like maybe well, I'll just start
[21:59] here. Like news flash, it is a good
[22:01] and holy and fine thing to want to be physically attracted to
[22:04] the person that you're dating 100% like you are going to have
[22:06] to spend your the rest of your life.
[22:07] You're going to have to make like produce a family with this
[22:11] person, right, right. So you should not feel shallow
[22:14] for wanting to be physically attracted to them. 100%
[22:16] definitely think attraction can grow.
[22:18] Definitely think that, you know, sometimes like it's just not for
[22:21] me. So I think there's a balance.
[22:24] Like we tend to talk in extremes.
[22:26] Like we were just talking about pressure versus non pressure.
[22:28] Like, and I think I'm just checking yourself.
[22:33] One thing that I noticed on Instagram or TikTok or whatever,
[22:36] when you're scrolling is everyone's ready to define what
[22:39] it's supposed to look like. Like what you deserve, you
[22:42] deserve that. Like if you just scroll for a
[22:43] second, it's I deserve this, I deserve this, I deserve to be
[22:47] treated this way and really unplugging and praying with the
[22:52] Lord and saying like, Lord lead me to who I need to be hanging
[22:56] out with as like friends in Group settings.
[22:59] What events do you think you know?
[23:01] Will you guide me to that? Maybe I can meet someone.
[23:04] Are you calling me to explore candidating?
[23:06] Because maybe we'll be there, but just trying to find that
[23:09] middle ground. And I probably would have had a
[23:12] different answer to this if you would have asked me a year ago.
[23:14] But after seeing kind of what we've seen in the last year, I
[23:18] think my best advice to people would be to be honest with
[23:23] yourself in like in your prayer to the Lord for a spouse.
[23:28] And then know that he wants you to meet someone that is also
[23:33] going to make you all all these things that you think that you
[23:36] want, you know, happy prayer, life thriving, someone that
[23:39] you're excited about creating a family with.
[23:41] So I definitely think they go hand in hand and I think we can
[23:44] really over spiritualize it sometimes.
[23:46] Yeah, I totally agree. Kind of on that note, I also
[23:49] think there's something to be said about if I'm a single woman
[23:53] and I come across a nice guy on candid, that I think he's
[23:57] attractive and I think he has the same morals and values, He
[24:01] isn't going to check every single box the first time.
[24:04] And so I think there's something to be said for also allowing
[24:07] yourself to grow together. You know, my husband and I are a
[24:11] great example of a complete 180. We didn't go to mass.
[24:15] We weren't even I don't even think we knew the other person
[24:18] was Catholic when we first started dating.
[24:20] And it just it again, it's a miracle.
[24:22] But yeah, having having that also that mentality of OK, well,
[24:27] he doesn't have to check every single box, but really thinking
[24:30] like what does what's the most important thing that you know,
[24:33] he's a practicing Catholic. Great.
[24:34] He if he doesn't pray the rosary every single day or enough times
[24:38] or do enough prayers. But that's also our jobs as
[24:41] spouses are to get each other to heaven and to help each other
[24:43] and grow with each other and motivate each other.
[24:46] So I think that's, that's also really important to keep in
[24:49] mind. And it comes back to that piece
[24:50] of like authenticity and honesty and being realistic with, with
[24:55] your expectations and what you know, you can also provide to
[24:58] another person. You know, I think Canada does a
[25:01] really good job at just from what I've seen, what I've read,
[25:05] the videos that I've watched, you know, prior to this, just a
[25:07] really good job at pushing back against, you know, the hookup
[25:11] culture that we have been ingrained to believe is normal.
[25:16] That's that's the thing. Like it is normal.
[25:18] If I was not in my faith and I, you know, after I got out of my
[25:23] first marriage, if I would have texted any one of my friends
[25:26] whom I'm still friends with, you know, but none of them are
[25:29] practicing Catholics. But if I would have texted any
[25:31] of them and said, I slept with this guy and it was great.
[25:33] I think he's the one or I hooked up with this guy and it was, it
[25:36] was great. Or Oh my gosh, I just had a one.
[25:37] I'd stand never again. Nobody would have pushed back
[25:40] him. And like, really, it's just this
[25:43] totally normalized way of approaching someone.
[25:46] Is there one way that you think Canada does kind of push back
[25:49] against that hookup culture? Yeah, I love that question and
[25:52] thanks for sharing that because I think it's so true what you
[25:55] just said. I think my favorite part about
[25:59] it is you have to have some guts to be a hand user.
[26:03] You really do like, you have to be like.
[26:05] That's something that I appreciate that it kind of like
[26:09] weeds itself out. Like, you know, we are able to
[26:11] kind of weed out people through the process.
[26:13] Yeah. Because you have to give some
[26:15] time. You have to be intentional with
[26:17] your conversations, and you have to be willing to do what we're
[26:20] doing right now, which is be face to face with someone and
[26:23] interact with them. Yeah.
[26:24] And if you're looking for the things that you just described
[26:28] or if that's your mentality, you're probably going to go
[26:30] somewhere where it's a lot easier to meet someone, Right,
[26:32] right. You know, you're probably going
[26:33] to be fine staying on the perpetual swiping apps.
[26:37] And I'm sure like going fishing there is going to get, you know,
[26:43] get the results you want. But if you want someone who is
[26:46] willing to have a conversation, is serious about wanting to find
[26:49] a partner and is ready for just, like, authentic, genuine
[26:54] encounters with one another, again, we want you to go do that
[26:57] in person, in real life. Yeah.
[27:01] But if we can introduce you to those people who have said yes
[27:05] to the process of what we offer, I think that's my favorite way
[27:10] that we can push back on the culture, for sure.
[27:12] I'm just going to say also, if there's someone listening who
[27:14] like a, a female I, we're kind of speaking in that sense who
[27:19] does like, if you do find yourself in that situation and
[27:22] you do feel like you are the one that is fighting the culture,
[27:25] that maybe you're the only one around your friends who has that
[27:28] point of view or has those hard boundaries.
[27:33] I just want to say that you feel totally isolated and alone, but
[27:37] you're in good company that there are others out there who
[27:40] are fighting the same fight that you are.
[27:42] And you have no idea the jewels on your crown in heaven that are
[27:48] waiting for you for sticking to your guns, for wanting and
[27:54] desiring something holy and being willing to stand on your
[27:58] own because they know what that's like.
[27:59] Sometimes you have to just like stand on your own and nobody,
[28:04] you feel misunderstood, nobody understands, nobody gets it.
[28:07] They joke, they laugh at you, whatever.
[28:09] So just know that your, your reward is coming both in this
[28:14] life and the next 100%. I just wanted to say that.
[28:17] No, that's so beautiful. And I do hope that anybody
[28:19] listening, men and women alike, you know.
[28:21] They men too. Yes, love.
[28:23] We love the men. We do, we love women.
[28:26] We love. And I think it's, it's great
[28:28] because you can tell that there's there's Catholics who
[28:31] are craving these very intense intentional relationships.
[28:34] And that's why I think we've seen such a rise in the
[28:37] reversion back to the Catholic Church.
[28:40] You know, now kind of shifting gears a little bit into more of
[28:43] the kind of encouragement, you know, this, this goes without
[28:46] saying, but this is for all ages.
[28:48] This is not for 20 somethings. This is not for, you know, it
[28:52] can be. I have listeners that span all
[28:55] sorts of walks in life and ages and countries and whatever it
[28:59] may be. But you know, this is not for
[29:02] people who, if you feel that your time to for love has
[29:09] passed, then that's, you know, I want to make sure that you guys
[29:12] hear loud and clear that this is for everyone, anyone who is
[29:15] single, anyone who's Catholic and, and longing for that
[29:18] companionship. Like we mentioned earlier, you
[29:20] know, our faith is it's not a solo event.
[29:24] And so we do crave that interpersonal relationship
[29:28] rather it's from friendships, from family, from relationships,
[29:32] you know, evangelization and just like minded people.
[29:34] We crave that face to face interaction that can often, most
[29:38] of the time it does kind of start online and then shift to
[29:40] there. So, you know, but I wanted to
[29:43] kind of ask if you had like a favorite St. example for God's
[29:48] timing or anything like that, if there's anyone that you look up
[29:51] to in that way. Yeah, well, Saint Joseph is my
[29:55] guy for sure. That's like always first and
[29:58] foremost. Who?
[29:59] Can't love Saint Joseph. She's the greatest St.
[30:03] Maria Goretti was my my confirmation St. and so I looked
[30:08] at her often. We love JP 2 at Candid I think
[30:13] it was. Not gonna be started on JP 2.
[30:15] Yeah, like, I think that's what for me personally, kind of
[30:19] around all this, all this was going on, like all the stirring
[30:22] in my heart at the same time. But whenever I learned about
[30:25] theology of the body and I really dove into that and
[30:27] realized, like, this is the reason behind the way that I
[30:31] operate. Like, this is I know what the
[30:34] church teaches. I know you know what you're
[30:36] supposed to do, what you're not supposed to do in regards to,
[30:39] like, you know, dating, sexuality, culture, all that,
[30:41] all that. But like, here is the root
[30:44] reason why it all kind of clicked for me.
[30:48] And so I'm really I'm really grateful to him for taking the
[30:51] time to taking the time for making it his life's mission to
[30:58] teach us and explain to us in ways that like are so beautiful
[31:01] and so just like the way that the human heart can cling on to
[31:08] his words. Yeah, teachings.
[31:10] So we definitely lean on him a lot It candid.
[31:13] And then also, we can't leave out Mother Angelica.
[31:15] She's not a St. but we feel like her all the time.
[31:20] Oh, I'm. Sure, because like like like
[31:22] Mariana, my Co founder, she comes from corporate America.
[31:25] She's this really awesome exact and what she does like she's
[31:31] she's amazing and my background, like I said, is, you know, is
[31:35] not building an app and so we very much lean on her a lot of
[31:39] like what do we need? Lord, that's what we need.
[31:43] OK, then we're going to go like, you know, sound the horns to try
[31:46] to find it even though we don't know how it's going to happen
[31:48] so. I know that you said your Co
[31:50] founder and her husband are now married and they kind of met
[31:53] through the events but do you have any success stories?
[31:55] I did I I cheated. I looked on your Instagram.
[31:59] OK, I did see that there was a candid wedding.
[32:02] The photo you probably saw was Marcel and Alicia.
[32:04] They're fabulous. They were.
[32:06] They met on one of our first events.
[32:08] Oh, great. And so we were able to see
[32:10] their, like, what a testament unfold.
[32:12] Yeah. I was like, they called us and I
[32:14] was like, Oh my gosh, It was, yeah, they're so great.
[32:17] I've loved getting to know them. That's another thing, too.
[32:20] It's just like we really do. We are not sitting in some
[32:23] corporate office in a big building like doing this like we
[32:28] are. It's, it's a very small team of
[32:30] people who touch this every single day.
[32:32] Yeah, we're praying for you, who are like cheering you on just as
[32:35] much as you want to find someone.
[32:37] So yeah, Marcel and Alicia are fabulous.
[32:39] We have another wedding coming this fall, a couple of
[32:42] engagements that we've gotten some phone calls about that are
[32:44] coming so and you. Guys have been doing this for
[32:46] about a year, right? Yeah.
[32:47] And so I feel like it's a natural cadence of like Marcel
[32:53] and Alicia, the timing from like when they met to like them
[32:56] getting married, I was so at peace with not that it would
[32:59] have, you know, they can do whatever they want, but like the
[33:02] natural timeline of things has like progressed to where now
[33:05] we're able to see the fruits of. That's I.
[33:08] Was just gonna say that. So yeah, no, it's been really
[33:11] such a blessing. I cry every time I get a phone
[33:13] call. I can't help it.
[33:14] Sure, even if someone like we've had a couple of a few couples
[33:18] that have reached out after they've, you know, dated 6-9
[33:22] months and broken up. And I'm always impressed with
[33:27] what they come back with because like their posture of humility,
[33:30] if you will, of being so thankful for the opportunity to
[33:34] like encounter the person that they were with.
[33:35] Yeah, right. All of both of them, you know,
[33:37] like both, both of will usually talk to the male and the female
[33:40] and they'll say it was a great relationship.
[33:43] And I was so grateful that I was able to meet someone who, you
[33:46] know, blah, blah, blah. And so to be able to be a very
[33:50] tiny part of facilitating that, just like.
[33:53] I'm here. It feels so rewarding.
[33:55] Weezers like the Lord, but just to be able to have any type of
[34:01] touch on that is so humbling. Yeah, I mean, it's a true
[34:05] testament to all the work that you guys are putting it.
[34:08] I mean, if you guys are married, you're like, I'm out of the
[34:10] singleness. Like I don't need to put all my
[34:12] time and effort into this just to help other people.
[34:15] But you really are just. It's absolutely amazing.
[34:17] I bet you in like the next year is when you'll get your first
[34:21] candid baby. And you know, I'm just.
[34:24] So cool, I would have heard you said that we pray for that.
[34:27] We pray for because really again, rewiring the brains.
[34:30] But I've always been very passionate about just like
[34:33] marriage and family life. I come from really loving
[34:37] parents that I'm so grateful for that I was able to see their
[34:40] relationship growing up. And then I just, I don't know,
[34:45] I, I was, I do believe that the everything lives and dies on the
[34:49] family back to JP 2. The family is our, the building
[34:52] block of society. And if the family goes, then we
[34:54] have no chance and we are already seeing the world burn
[34:58] around us. And so I really just feel like
[35:02] what steps lead to having thriving families and then we
[35:07] are able to plug ourselves into one of those steps.
[35:10] It first comes, like you said, from like culture and being,
[35:13] being the light in the cesspool darkness that is like our game
[35:18] pools right now. But then insert us if we're able
[35:21] to introduce you to people who maybe you can change course
[35:25] with. Yeah, that's what we're here.
[35:27] For SO and the Church needs holy, holy families, holy
[35:31] families, you know, people of and that that is not to say that
[35:35] you need to have it all together the moment you meet someone.
[35:39] We've all you know, it's, it's all a journey, but I just think
[35:42] it's beautiful. You guys play.
[35:43] It's such an important it's a small but the most important.
[35:46] If it wasn't for you facilitating these
[35:48] introductions, then you wouldn't have these marriages.
[35:51] And marriage is a sacrament. And we've gotten so, so, so far
[35:54] away from that in our society that it's so refreshing to see
[35:58] people who not only value it, but a company who is, you know,
[36:02] also valuing the true sanctity that is the sacrament of
[36:05] marriage and, and sharing that with other people.
[36:08] So before we wrap, wrap up, I want to make sure you can plug
[36:11] in where can everyone find you find candid.
[36:14] What should they do if they want to sign up?
[36:16] What's the first step they need to do today?
[36:17] Thank you. OK, so today you could go to
[36:20] candidating.net. You can find everything that you
[36:23] need there. We're at Candid Under Score
[36:25] Dating on all platforms and very soon you'll be able to find us
[36:30] in the App Store, which if you go to our Instagram or anything
[36:33] like that, it'll link straight to.
[36:36] That OK, Perfect. OK, great.
[36:38] Oh my gosh, that is. Wonderful.
[36:39] Thank you for having me. No, absolutely.
[36:41] Great chatting with you. It was so great.
[36:43] And hopefully we can do maybe a year check in and you can tell
[36:46] me about the candid marriages and the candid babies.
[36:48] And if any of my audience, you know, uses candid, please reach
[36:53] reach back out because then we can do a nice follow up episode.
[36:56] But yeah, thank you so much for coming on and thank you guys for
[37:00] listening. And for those of you in your
[37:01] single time, just remember that discipleship really shaped
[37:05] everything, even love. So, you know, thank you all for
[37:09] being here and thank you Taylor again.
[37:10] And I will see you guys after mass.

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