# Ep 61 The Surprising Skill Your Dog Needs to Transform Their Behaviour

An episode of [Help! My Dog: The Podcast. Dog Behaviour & Training Strategies that Work!](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1721245241), 29 Jan 2025, 10 min.

Audio: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2287608/episodes/16213845-ep-61-the-surprising-skill-your-dog-needs-to-transform-their-behaviour.mp3

Imagine your dog being able to make better decisions across different situations – choosing to stay calm around guests, resisting the temptation to jump on the counter, choosing their bed instead of hogging the sofa. This time, we’re not talking about calmness or disengagement. We’re uncovering the one essential skill no one’s talking about that could completely transform your dog’s behaviour – flexibility! In this episode, we’ll be exploring how teaching emotional and behavioural flexibility can be a game-changer to help your dog with any struggle. ................ Whether your dog is unpredictable with other dogs or predictably bad… Whether it looks like freezing, barking, lunging or running away… Whether you are just starting out on your dog-owning journey or your dog has been labelled as having a “behaviour problem”… … this episode is for you and is going to give you huge insights! Want to join the Help! My Dog Online HUB? Here's the link: www.helpmydog.com/hub Dr Tom is a world-renowned veterinarian, behaviourist and dog trainer and director of the Behavet behaviour clinic (rated Excellent on Trustpilot), which sees over 400 pet behaviour consultations each and every month no matter where you are in the world. In 2023, he started Help! My Dog, an online dog behaviour learning platform to help even more owners all over the world and show that dog behaviour transformation is not only possible but it's FUN, with the right know-how! Make sure to subscribe/follow the podcast for the free weekly episodes! Useful Links: Follow Help! My Dog on FaceBook: https://www.facebook.com/helpmydogofficial/ Schedule a Consultation with Behavet: https://www.beha.vet/ Follow Behavet on FaceBook: https://www.facebook.com/behavet

## Transcript

[0:00] SPEAKER_00: I feel like sitting in the box is the only choice.
[0:02] SPEAKER_00: And you go, okay, but it's not, so let's have a go at something over here.
[0:05] SPEAKER_00: And they go, oh, but I just want to sit in the box.
[0:08] SPEAKER_00: Right?
[0:08] SPEAKER_00: Sit, I said, yeah.
[0:10] SPEAKER_00: And before we dive in, a warning.
[0:14] SPEAKER_00: The content of this podcast may not be appropriate for some young listeners.
[0:20] SPEAKER_00: This is real life, and that means that sometimes it can be a little bit graphic.
[0:24] SPEAKER_00: So listen on at your own peril.
[0:27] SPEAKER_00: As a veterinarian, dog behaviourist, best-selling author, and trainer, over the past decade, I've had an obsession with transforming the behaviour of dogs, understanding their brains and creating practical strategies that you can implement easily at home.
[0:42] SPEAKER_00: I know all too well when the dream you imagined when you first got your dog is far from your daily reality.
[0:48] SPEAKER_00: In fact, out of the blue, a few months ago, my little dog Gorse was bitten by a dog 20 times her size.
[0:55] SPEAKER_00: And suddenly our life of stress-free walks, a calm and cuddly household, and being teammates was replaced with reactivity, anxiety, and worrying about what's around the next corner.
[1:06] SPEAKER_00: I'm Dr.
[1:07] SPEAKER_00: Tom, this is the Help My Dog podcast, and this is me documenting that journey of transformation, sharing my knowledge and experience with you, and having a few laughs along the way.
[1:18] SPEAKER_00: Hello, HMD family, and in today's episode, we're going to be talking about the skill that your dog needs to transform their behavior that nobody is talking about.
[1:30] SPEAKER_00: Okay?
[1:30] SPEAKER_00: Now, what is it?
[1:32] SPEAKER_00: Well, think about it.
[1:33] SPEAKER_00: In order for your dog to change their behavior, they need to have the skill of flexibility.
[1:40] SPEAKER_00: Now, what is flexibility?
[1:42] SPEAKER_00: Flexibility is the ability for your dog to make different decisions despite the situation being the same.
[1:51] SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
[1:52] SPEAKER_00: So, for example, your dog needs to be flexible to learn that they can get on their bed instead of jumping on the kitchen counter like they normally do.
[2:02] SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
[2:02] SPEAKER_00: Your dog needs to be flexible and have this ability to be flexible to learn that four feet on the floor is an option as well as jumping up at your visitors, right?
[2:13] SPEAKER_00: Your dog needs to be flexible in learning that, well, before it was fine to jump on the sofa, now they're a 50 kilo Labrador, not a five kilo Labrador puppy, and therefore they need to learn not to jump on the sofa, right?
[2:27] SPEAKER_00: Um, and there are two types of flexibility, and this is where I think flexibility gets super exciting.
[2:33] SPEAKER_00: Um, there's behavioral flexibility, okay?
[2:37] SPEAKER_00: In other words, same situation, I need you to make a different choice, right?
[2:42] SPEAKER_00: Um, and there is emotional flexibility.
[2:45] SPEAKER_00: In other words, you you used to feel this emotion about this thing, now you're gonna feel a different emotion, okay?
[2:53] SPEAKER_00: Now of course there are a few different reasons why this is so so crucial, and I've covered one of them.
[2:59] SPEAKER_00: First of all, if we want to change our dog's behavior, that requ that requires from them that to be flexible.
[3:06] SPEAKER_00: The second thing is that sometimes we don't want to change their behavior forever, but a situation might sometimes allow for a certain choice and sometimes not allow for a certain choice.
[3:17] SPEAKER_00: The example might be sometimes your dog is allowed to go and greet the person, sometimes they are not.
[3:23] SPEAKER_00: Sometimes your dog is allowed to go and greet the other dog, sometimes they are not.
[3:28] SPEAKER_00: And that requires flexibility, yeah, rather than rigidity.
[3:31] SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
[3:32] SPEAKER_00: If your dog is rigid in their behavior, rigid in their choices, they will always have to do that thing in that situation.
[3:40] SPEAKER_00: And so flexibility can create a dog that's more of a teammate, right?
[3:45] SPEAKER_00: Um third is that obviously I spend a lot of my life working on, and the behave vet team um do as well, is actually that often when dogs have behavior struggles, it's be it's driven by an emotion.
[3:58] SPEAKER_00: And we need to change that emotion that they are feeling.
[4:02] SPEAKER_00: Yeah, they are feeling worried when left home alone.
[4:04] SPEAKER_00: Well, they need emotional flexibility to not feel worried about that.
[4:08] SPEAKER_00: They feel worried about other dogs, they feel over excited about people.
[4:13] SPEAKER_00: Emotional flexibility is key.
[4:16] SPEAKER_00: So, how do we what would be three tips that I could give you that would grow flexibility in your dog?
[4:22] SPEAKER_00: Okay, fast fire.
[4:23] SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be fast fire episode, right?
[4:25] SPEAKER_00: First tip that I've got for you is um okay, I love this one because it's loads of fun.
[4:32] SPEAKER_00: You're gonna pick up an object, any object, normally a box, right?
[4:37] SPEAKER_00: Because the, you know, Amazon box or something.
[4:39] SPEAKER_00: How many different things can you get your dog to do with that box, right?
[4:44] SPEAKER_00: Two pores in, one pour in, back paws in, front paws in, sitting in the box, lying down in the box, picking the box up with our um with our mouth, sitting next to the box and not interacting with the box, lying down next to the box and not interacting with the box, walking around the box, getting into the box and doing a spin within the box.
[5:03] SPEAKER_00: Yeah?
[5:04] SPEAKER_00: This grows their ability to be flexible.
[5:06] SPEAKER_00: Don't worry about teaching them it like with a verbal cue.
[5:09] SPEAKER_00: You might lower these behaviors.
[5:11] SPEAKER_00: The point is that you'll find that it really does grow your dog's flexibility because at some point in playing that game, your dog's gonna go, oh, but now I'm rigid, I want to sit in that box.
[5:21] SPEAKER_00: Yeah?
[5:23] SPEAKER_00: I feel like sitting in the box is the only choice.
[5:25] SPEAKER_00: And you go, okay, but it's not, so let's have a go at something over here.
[5:29] SPEAKER_00: And they go, Oh, but I just want to sit in the box, right?
[5:31] SPEAKER_00: Sit, I said, yeah.
[5:33] SPEAKER_00: Um, not spin next to the box, okay?
[5:39] SPEAKER_00: So um but that is um that is one tip that I've got for you.
[5:44] SPEAKER_00: All right, so second tip that I think is is is is a really one, okay?
[5:49] SPEAKER_00: It's an easy win.
[5:50] SPEAKER_00: Hey guys, are your walks as enjoyable as they could be right now?
[5:53] SPEAKER_00: Is your dog looking at you lovingly, walking at your side, recalling perfectly, not reacting to things in the environment, and you're able to enjoy the scenery.
[6:02] SPEAKER_00: If that's not you, how would you like me to take the wheel and make it happen, right?
[6:06] SPEAKER_00: I've got a 10-day plan.
[6:08] SPEAKER_00: It's a video step by step.
[6:09] SPEAKER_00: You watch the video each day, you implement the learning, super simple, super fun, and it'll move you forward from where you are right now to those dream walks that you imagined when you first got your dog.
[6:21] SPEAKER_00: All you need to do is head to this link.
[6:25] SPEAKER_00: And if you use this link, you're gonna get 60% off and some extra gifts for being a podcast listener.
[6:32] SPEAKER_00: All you've got to do is head to go.helpmydog.com forward slash stressful walks.
[6:40] SPEAKER_00: That's go.helpmydog.com forward slash stressful walks.
[6:46] SPEAKER_00: In the 10-day plan, you're gonna learn all the skills you need to teach your dog to want to engage with you, to want to disengage from distractions, and to be cool, calm, and collected about anything that might come your way on that walk.
[6:58] SPEAKER_00: It'll get you from where you are right now to that dream that you imagined when you first got your dog.
[7:05] SPEAKER_00: All right, so second tip that I think is a really one, okay?
[7:10] SPEAKER_00: It's an easy win.
[7:12] SPEAKER_00: That is that there'll be things that happen throughout the day where your dog always makes a particular choice and you can show them that there are other things they can do in that setting, okay?
[7:23] SPEAKER_00: Now, the one that, and you're probably thinking, I can't think of a single example.
[7:27] SPEAKER_00: This example will apply to all of you.
[7:29] SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you go to your back door, you open the back door to let your dog out to the toilet.
[7:34] SPEAKER_00: What does your dog do?
[7:35] SPEAKER_00: They go through the door, right?
[7:37] SPEAKER_00: Rigid.
[7:38] SPEAKER_00: How about you touch the door handle?
[7:41] SPEAKER_00: Can you do a sit?
[7:43] SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
[7:44] SPEAKER_00: Can you go into middle?
[7:45] SPEAKER_00: In other words, come around my legs and stand between my legs if your dog knows that.
[7:50] SPEAKER_00: Can you do a down?
[7:52] SPEAKER_00: Can you actually can I just open the door and you not go through it and I just feed you here?
[7:56] SPEAKER_00: Yeah?
[7:57] SPEAKER_00: Um the cool thing is that there are many rigid patterns that are just part of every day.
[8:02] SPEAKER_00: And it's not too much of a fight or a battle or a conflict to just get our dogs experiencing different things with those, right?
[8:10] SPEAKER_00: Um, so that would be the second tip that I've got for you.
[8:12] SPEAKER_00: And the third tip that I've got for you for growing your dog's flexibility is a really obvious one.
[8:19] SPEAKER_00: You're probably gonna think, of course he's gonna say that, right?
[8:22] SPEAKER_00: And that is transform your dog's struggles, right?
[8:25] SPEAKER_00: And this is really cool.
[8:27] SPEAKER_00: The more you transform your dog's struggles, in other words, teach them to behave differently in different settings, teach them to feel differently about different experiences.
[8:36] SPEAKER_00: Guess what?
[8:37] SPEAKER_00: It feels like skiing uphill at first, but as they do this, as they learn to experience different emotions, learn to make different choices in despite the situation looking the same.
[8:48] SPEAKER_00: With each struggle that you transform, it gets easier because they get better at being flexible, because they're practicing being flexible.
[8:57] SPEAKER_00: Yeah?
[8:58] SPEAKER_00: Think about ourselves.
[9:00] SPEAKER_00: Often we become very rigid when life is very rigid, when life requires us to be flexible because we have to be flexible to overcome challenges.
[9:09] SPEAKER_00: It just becomes normal to be flexible.
[9:11] SPEAKER_00: It's like, okay, yeah, I can be flexible, I can fix that, I can see a solution, I can change, you know, I can I can change my plan.
[9:17] SPEAKER_00: And changing your plan just becomes more accepted and more enjoyed and more tolerated, right?
[9:24] SPEAKER_00: Um and it's the same with your dogs.
[9:26] SPEAKER_00: The more struggles you transform, the easier it is to transform struggles in that dog because of the skill of flexibility.
[9:33] SPEAKER_00: Now, if you got value from this podcast, guys, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts.
[9:38] SPEAKER_00: It was whisper it was whistle stop tour, um, that one.
[9:42] SPEAKER_00: Um, and partly the reason being that you may have got value from listening, but you know how you can get more value is by just executing just one thing that I went through.
[9:51] SPEAKER_00: Just one of those tips, right?
[9:53] SPEAKER_00: The second one is super easy because you're going to see loads of opportunities to do this.
[9:57] SPEAKER_00: Like you get your dog's lead out the drawer, and normally that means you put the lead on and you go out the door.
[10:02] SPEAKER_00: How about you don't today?
[10:03] SPEAKER_00: How about you, I don't know, do sit down, stand left, right, middle.
[10:07] SPEAKER_00: I don't know, whatever it might be.
[10:08] SPEAKER_00: There's so many opportunities to grow your dog's flexibility, and it's one of the greatest and best gifts that we could give to our dogs to thrive in life rather than just survive.
[10:17] SPEAKER_00: We will see you next time.

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