# #224 Did we just double our workload!?

An episode of [Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1684076859), 10 May 2026, 44 min.

Audio: https://p.podderapp.com/2544644999/traffic.omny.fm/d/clips/2fb3740d-3436-44af-8cc0-a91900716aa5/16e204f8-7e20-441d-9775-b47f001b3998/03cacf76-0aaf-4041-a9da-b47f001eaa25/audio.mp3?utm_source=Podcast&in_playlist=cc3ed8c4-97c9-4810-ace6-b47f001b3db5

We're back so soon! Not what you were expecting!? You've been asking and now we're FINALLY delivering - two eps a week every Monday and Wednesday. In today's new ep we dive head first into housekeeping and boy is there a lot of it (because we all know you secretly love it)! Ash reveals a pathetic injury he got while parenting this week. While Matt is wondering if he'll ever be remembered for his who he really is!? And there's a new phrase in their kids vocabulary that is driving them nuts! Perhaps the double full moon is to blame - either way, we're all going loosey goosey! If you need a shoulder to cry on: Two Doting Dads Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/639833491568735/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheTwoDotingDads Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/twodotingdads/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@twodotingdads See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

## Transcript

[0:00] Speaker 1: I keep seeing this lady in my neighborhood. It's an
[0:02] Speaker 1: elder lady. She's probably like her late seventies, maybe good age,
[0:06] Speaker 1: great age, golden years. Someone say, anyway, she she must
[0:09] Speaker 1: run like a little dog walking business. Yeah she has
[0:12] Speaker 1: seventy seven, yeah, seventy seven. Specific she has no control
[0:16] Speaker 1: over those dogs.
[0:20] Speaker 2: Hell being mauled by them.
[0:23] Speaker 1: But running each way like you know in the you
[0:26] Speaker 1: know in step Brothers and that guy, the blind guy
[0:29] Speaker 1: has the dog and the dog is just completely out.
[0:32] Speaker 1: It's like that with a bunch of little dogs. Funny
[0:35] Speaker 1: and they're all on a belt.
[0:36] Speaker 2: Oh god, they're all like in.
[0:38] Speaker 1: Different directions, and one's pooper, and then she's dragging one along.
[0:41] Speaker 2: She can retire, she doesn't need to. She's like, that's
[0:45] Speaker 2: a hard business for an old person.
[0:47] Speaker 1: Because at first I thought she's got all these dogs.
[0:49] Speaker 1: There must be her dogs. But then I see her
[0:51] Speaker 1: with different dogs. I'm like, oh, she must have a
[0:53] Speaker 1: all the young.
[0:53] Speaker 2: Person's game totally and like one pulling the wrong direction
[0:57] Speaker 2: that those hips.
[0:58] Speaker 1: I know what she would have thought. She would have thought,
[1:00] Speaker 1: I'm great with dogs, and I feel like doing something good. Also,
[1:03] Speaker 1: good for you for wanting to do something.
[1:05] Speaker 2: Good incidental exercise.
[1:06] Speaker 1: Maybe gets to maybe learn how to tame the dogs.
[1:10] Speaker 2: It's so funny. Have you offered to help her?
[1:13] Speaker 1: Fuck's getting paid.
[1:31] Speaker 2: Welcome back to two doting dads. I'm Maddie Jay and
[1:34] Speaker 2: I'm Ash And this is a podcast all about parenting.
[1:36] Speaker 2: It is the good, it is the bad and the relatable.
[1:39] Speaker 2: As you know, we don't give advice. But what we
[1:42] Speaker 2: do do do do is housekeeping.
[1:45] Speaker 1: And it's Monday, and it's a Monday.
[1:47] Speaker 2: Wow, what is happening?
[1:48] Speaker 1: What is happening?
[1:50] Speaker 2: This is the first of the new episodes, the housekeeping episodes.
[1:53] Speaker 2: Because you greedy bastards kept asking for more. They can't
[1:57] Speaker 2: get enough, give us more, fending you off.
[2:00] Speaker 1: A yearly trying to double my work line, aren't they guys?
[2:03] Speaker 1: Please come on, this is meant to be a family.
[2:06] Speaker 1: I have to be a present father. Thank you for
[2:08] Speaker 1: getting me out of the house.
[2:11] Speaker 2: Children right now are like, mummy, where's Dad. He's talking
[2:14] Speaker 2: to his followers.
[2:16] Speaker 1: The dotors need him, they need him more than you.
[2:19] Speaker 2: Bye bye. But here we are like hopefully this continues.
[2:23] Speaker 2: It's always my biggest fear because we put this off
[2:26] Speaker 2: for a little while of like saying yes to more work,
[2:29] Speaker 2: and then a month in both of us going well,
[2:33] Speaker 2: I can't do this, VIC till the followers, we're canceling
[2:35] Speaker 2: the Monday episodes.
[2:36] Speaker 1: This whole podcast was like that. It's like a month
[2:38] Speaker 1: and we're like, God, it is hard work. Here we
[2:41] Speaker 1: are three or so years later.
[2:43] Speaker 2: How long will this go for?
[2:44] Speaker 1: I'll figure it out.
[2:45] Speaker 2: I'm not quite sure.
[2:46] Speaker 1: The first little dot point here, I've got PSA. Full moon, Vic.
[2:51] Speaker 2: Yes, I am interested in the moon. So I saw
[2:53] Speaker 2: it on the weekend. It was big.
[2:55] Speaker 3: Yeah. I thought the parents out there needed a bit
[2:58] Speaker 3: of PSA this week because I don't know about your kids,
[3:00] Speaker 3: but my kids go absolutely mental whenever there's.
[3:03] Speaker 1: A full moon like a were wolf.
[3:05] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[3:06] Speaker 3: Literally. And then last night I saw there was a
[3:09] Speaker 3: full moon and a friend of mine said, there's going
[3:11] Speaker 3: to be two.
[3:12] Speaker 2: This month, two full moons.
[3:15] Speaker 3: Two full moons.
[3:16] Speaker 2: Can I be done for a second? How often do
[3:18] Speaker 2: we get a full moon?
[3:19] Speaker 1: It's cyclical, go on, there's a cycle to the muon
[3:22] Speaker 1: to mune immune to the moon. It's cyclical. So it
[3:29] Speaker 1: goes tiny little slither, yeah, slightly bigger slither.
[3:32] Speaker 2: It's once a month, full once a month.
[3:34] Speaker 1: Do we really care.
[3:35] Speaker 3: Yes, the full moon occurs every twenty nine point five
[3:39] Speaker 3: three days, so.
[3:40] Speaker 1: Specific that's exactly what I said. That was going to
[3:42] Speaker 1: be the next word that I now twenty nine point
[3:45] Speaker 1: three five days, So we're going to have.
[3:47] Speaker 2: A moon every like fifteen days to make it twice
[3:50] Speaker 2: in a month. A full moon.
[3:51] Speaker 1: Well, it could be the start of the twenty ninth
[3:54] Speaker 1: day and then the first day of the next cycle
[3:57] Speaker 1: falling in the same month. Does this periods very good question?
[4:02] Speaker 3: It shouldn't, because.
[4:04] Speaker 1: Let's just say it does. It shouldn't. Let's just say
[4:08] Speaker 1: it to us.
[4:10] Speaker 3: But basically, there's going to be one at the start
[4:12] Speaker 3: of the month and then one at the end of
[4:13] Speaker 3: the month. And the second moon is called a blue moon,
[4:16] Speaker 3: which is very infrequent, and so it happens every three
[4:19] Speaker 3: years or so, which is why the phrase once in
[4:22] Speaker 3: a blue moon came about.
[4:24] Speaker 2: I love those kind of facts. That's a that's a
[4:25] Speaker 2: nun effect. I'm going to tell her that, and she's
[4:28] Speaker 2: going to she already knows, Yeah, she pretends that she is.
[4:32] Speaker 1: I'll call the dog walker over and be like, do
[4:34] Speaker 1: you know that's going to be too mean? God, the
[4:35] Speaker 1: dogs are going to go crazy. Crazy, crazier than the kids,
[4:40] Speaker 1: wasn't there.
[4:42] Speaker 2: I was speaking to someone on the weekend who knows
[4:44] Speaker 2: about moons and astrology.
[4:47] Speaker 3: Yeah, troscopes.
[4:48] Speaker 2: He said, the moon's bad for if you're a Taurus.
[4:52] Speaker 3: Is that this current moon?
[4:53] Speaker 1: Apparently the animal itself.
[4:55] Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know enough, but apparently the
[4:57] Speaker 2: moon who star signs the moon. It's a crazy at
[5:00] Speaker 2: the moment, but they're always crazy.
[5:02] Speaker 1: So I reckon they just we just find a reason
[5:04] Speaker 1: to like defind the craziness. I feel like that probably
[5:07] Speaker 1: hasn't had to do with any of that.
[5:09] Speaker 2: I know they're always up to something. But are we
[5:11] Speaker 2: inflicting more anxiety of the parents of this country and world? Yeah?
[5:15] Speaker 2: Go yes, But it's good to know.
[5:17] Speaker 1: It's good to know this.
[5:18] Speaker 2: It's good to have information as past knowledge is very true,
[5:22] Speaker 2: very true.
[5:23] Speaker 3: Now, I know the main thing you want to remember
[5:25] Speaker 3: is parents. If your kids are going crazy this month,
[5:28] Speaker 3: it's the moons. There's two bloody moons.
[5:30] Speaker 1: Yeah, let's blame the moons. VICKI thank you so much,
[5:34] Speaker 1: just for those listening. Vick hates being called Vicky. We've
[5:37] Speaker 1: just worked that out about five minutes ago. And now
[5:39] Speaker 1: Matt is so excited. I've got on MC in high
[5:44] Speaker 1: school video.
[5:45] Speaker 2: Sure you had a little measure up this morning. I
[5:47] Speaker 2: wasn't able to make it. I was late, which is
[5:49] Speaker 2: unlike me to just.
[5:51] Speaker 1: Lie over anyway. You were, you're busy doing something else.
[5:54] Speaker 1: That's fair enough. We don't need two people to measure up.
[5:55] Speaker 1: And we had Vick's partner Dan there, lovely fella didn't
[6:00] Speaker 1: know it was a Kiwi shocked me. Heah, we've measured up.
[6:07] Speaker 1: We're gonna put some walls in. We're gonna get the
[6:09] Speaker 1: construction going, which we will update and ask for the
[6:11] Speaker 1: listener's input as we go along.
[6:13] Speaker 2: And if you're wondering, gosh, what does the studio look
[6:15] Speaker 2: like for these guys and Vic, we will do a
[6:18] Speaker 2: little walk through video and give you an up that
[6:20] Speaker 2: on the plans on our socials.
[6:22] Speaker 1: We will Yeah, once we have plans.
[6:24] Speaker 2: We have a couple of ideas marinating right now.
[6:27] Speaker 1: Yes, we have just quick question speaking about drawings. Does
[6:31] Speaker 1: your kid do this too, where if they're drawing a picture,
[6:34] Speaker 1: you're not allowed to see it until it's done.
[6:36] Speaker 2: No, they want my input?
[6:37] Speaker 1: Nah ah, God, oscar fucking hell. Strange boy, what do
[6:42] Speaker 1: you mean he's doing a picture and he's like, cally
[6:45] Speaker 1: mine and if I accidentally see it, he's like, takes
[6:52] Speaker 1: off down the fucking hallway, just anything like what I think.
[6:56] Speaker 1: This morning I caught him just drawing a lizard.
[6:58] Speaker 2: What a boys draw?
[7:00] Speaker 3: Dix Okay, Louis doesn't do that.
[7:03] Speaker 2: Louis draw what's he drawing these days?
[7:04] Speaker 1: Boobies, any anatomy? He likes to draw animals.
[7:08] Speaker 3: And the other day he drew his teacher and then
[7:11] Speaker 3: wanted to give it to her and he's like, I
[7:13] Speaker 3: need sticky tape so she could put it on the
[7:14] Speaker 3: wall in the classroom.
[7:16] Speaker 1: Okay, see, also can draw anything, right, it doesn't have
[7:19] Speaker 1: to be any specific, and he'll just like melt down
[7:22] Speaker 1: if I've seen it and I said you this morning,
[7:23] Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm gonna love it regardless if I've seen
[7:26] Speaker 1: it before. It's done or it's done unless it's shit,
[7:31] Speaker 1: and it's just just so you know, it doesn't matter.
[7:33] Speaker 1: It doesn't need to be a surprise every time. So anyway,
[7:36] Speaker 1: I just want to I'd.
[7:36] Speaker 2: Rather that because I mate when it's six in the
[7:39] Speaker 2: morning and the girls are like, draw with me, what color?
[7:44] Speaker 2: And I'm going, fuck, I just need a coffee so bad.
[7:47] Speaker 2: If they were like, don't look at it, give me
[7:50] Speaker 2: half an hour, I'd go Heaven, you're considering yourself lucky.
[7:53] Speaker 1: Well, it's not that I don't know that. I'm not
[7:55] Speaker 1: meant to look. So I'm walking past where he's drawing,
[7:58] Speaker 1: but he's drawing in the middle of it. Might as
[7:59] Speaker 1: well like be right in the middle of the room,
[8:01] Speaker 1: like I can I not see it.
[8:02] Speaker 2: He's probably thinking how many times I have to fucking
[8:05] Speaker 2: tell this.
[8:05] Speaker 1: I told me once stop looking at the drawing into
[8:08] Speaker 1: another room. Then go into another room and do your drawing.
[8:12] Speaker 1: I did some drawing with them, Like I sat down
[8:14] Speaker 1: into drawing with them, drawing.
[8:16] Speaker 2: I drew.
[8:17] Speaker 1: I have to show you. Actually, it's pretty good. It's
[8:20] Speaker 1: cubes on all different angles linking together with some more
[8:24] Speaker 1: with more depth, different colors. It was like geometric. Anyway,
[8:28] Speaker 1: I did that that Basco flipped out because it was
[8:31] Speaker 1: so good and I can't please him anyway. Just thought
[8:36] Speaker 1: i'd ask you the question, because that's how I dealt
[8:37] Speaker 1: with this morning.
[8:38] Speaker 2: A little update on Marley's birthday party can confirm Laura
[8:42] Speaker 2: has changed the dates so we will be here in
[8:45] Speaker 2: the country for her actual birthday.
[8:48] Speaker 1: Change the days of the birthday of the trip, so.
[8:50] Speaker 2: The trip is changed. People were gosh up in arms
[8:54] Speaker 2: just the dots were divided. People were like, who you
[8:58] Speaker 2: liked a child? And I'm like, I line to my
[9:00] Speaker 2: kid every day every day.
[9:02] Speaker 1: But there's a hobby.
[9:02] Speaker 2: It should be based on honesty integrity. I'm like, no, Like,
[9:06] Speaker 2: it's based on love.
[9:07] Speaker 1: And I lie to you because I love you. The
[9:11] Speaker 1: more I lie to you, the more I love you. Simple,
[9:13] Speaker 1: I love you. That's a lie. I mean, I love you.
[9:15] Speaker 2: The amount of five fo well, the amount of people
[9:18] Speaker 2: who were in a relationship with someone who works five
[9:20] Speaker 2: or there on five fo themselves. And also like boxing
[9:24] Speaker 2: day sales or the price of chocolate eggs after Easter, Financially,
[9:28] Speaker 2: it works out way more beneficial if you do everything after.
[9:31] Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a money save. That's a hack. That's a
[9:34] Speaker 1: money saving trick because Easter eggs fucking they're setting them
[9:37] Speaker 1: down and it came out near my place for a
[9:39] Speaker 1: dollar a pop and at the end of the day,
[9:43] Speaker 1: it's all just chocolate. Can I add please?
[9:45] Speaker 3: One Jota said that her kid had always dreamed of
[9:48] Speaker 3: a beach party, but their birthday was in winter, so
[9:52] Speaker 3: they changed the birthday so that the party was in
[9:55] Speaker 3: summer and the kid had the best birthday ever. Didn't
[9:58] Speaker 3: have a clue that, like it was a different season, right,
[10:01] Speaker 3: I was like as a winter baby, I do love
[10:03] Speaker 3: that as a.
[10:03] Speaker 1: Kid way too.
[10:06] Speaker 2: I mean, fuck, oh god, goddamn, sorry Jesus, how many years.
[10:13] Speaker 3: Vic he wouldn't know mine?
[10:15] Speaker 1: But do you know his? You're it's August, your August
[10:17] Speaker 1: June twenty. Holy crap.
[10:19] Speaker 3: That's good to this morning, I know, but still to remember.
[10:22] Speaker 1: That you're August correct once a month. This conversation happened.
[10:26] Speaker 1: It's very fun.
[10:27] Speaker 2: Well, we don't need to tell we don't need to
[10:29] Speaker 2: talk about this with the dough is listening.
[10:31] Speaker 1: But you know what, maybe you'd care if I lied
[10:33] Speaker 1: about it and changed it. Maybe you'd start to care.
[10:36] Speaker 1: Maybe I just changed my birthday to yours because you're
[10:40] Speaker 1: so so self absorbed. Anyway, moving on.
[10:46] Speaker 2: I just think that's a great idea. Because Marley, I
[10:48] Speaker 2: asked her what she wanted to do for her birthday party.
[10:50] Speaker 2: Marley wants a water park location for her birth.
[10:54] Speaker 1: As a present, Just a whole park. We're going to
[10:57] Speaker 1: fit it. Which house, Okay, she wants to go to
[11:00] Speaker 1: a water park in June. That's the problem.
[11:03] Speaker 2: You know, it's dude, she doesn't because kids don't know,
[11:05] Speaker 2: like seasons.
[11:07] Speaker 1: Are the indoor ones the Olympic Park indoor one? Now, like, hey,
[11:12] Speaker 1: I don't do public pools, but you could go.
[11:13] Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't want to. That's too hot. And also
[11:16] Speaker 2: I would fit the amount of responsibility to have that
[11:19] Speaker 2: many kids.
[11:20] Speaker 1: You're a great swimmer.
[11:21] Speaker 2: No, I'm a good swimmer. But you know, you've probably
[11:23] Speaker 2: seen the video of Poppy covered in Nivia cream on
[11:26] Speaker 2: my Instagram. I had her for thirty minutes and that
[11:29] Speaker 2: was the stake. I ended up losing a child.
[11:32] Speaker 1: It wouldn't be a drop and gastitch. You couldn't do
[11:34] Speaker 1: that as a d That is a definite ITH's gotta
[11:37] Speaker 1: be ratioed, thank you. Yeah, but like also indoor pool
[11:41] Speaker 1: with a bunch of kids, imagine the decibels in that
[11:44] Speaker 1: ah you're talking about you have a headache. Now, you
[11:47] Speaker 1: would have a fucking headache at the end of that.
[11:49] Speaker 3: Could you do her birthday in Bali because there's an
[11:52] Speaker 3: amazing water park over there, and.
[11:54] Speaker 2: Then it's dangerous, but she's really into inviting her friends
[11:59] Speaker 2: and as I could just invite.
[12:00] Speaker 1: Her, just fly them all over on the jet.
[12:06] Speaker 2: I love my mum, Nana, Nana Ellie. She is just
[12:11] Speaker 2: the work she does around the house. You know, I
[12:13] Speaker 2: cannot thank her enough. We wouldn't be able to operate
[12:16] Speaker 2: as a unit as a family without her help. However,
[12:20] Speaker 2: this morning, this morning, and thankfully she listen to the podcast.
[12:23] Speaker 2: Otherwise she'd have a real problem and we'd have a
[12:26] Speaker 2: lot of I just.
[12:27] Speaker 1: Give her updates. I call her an updated what we
[12:29] Speaker 1: spoke about, because.
[12:30] Speaker 2: You would do that. This morning, I was getting the
[12:33] Speaker 2: kids ready for school and I was looking on the
[12:35] Speaker 2: floor and I was like, the fuck is the fucking
[12:38] Speaker 2: blue Like these little blue marks all over the floor.
[12:42] Speaker 2: Went into the bathroom, there's blue marks in there, like
[12:45] Speaker 2: little like, you know, five centimeters little like like a
[12:49] Speaker 2: little paintbrush someone's just gone through and like painted throughout.
[12:52] Speaker 2: And I was thinking, like maybe it was buster. Buster's
[12:55] Speaker 2: gotten We've got the chart they get ready chart in
[12:58] Speaker 2: the morning the kids have to have like the breakfast,
[13:00] Speaker 2: get the uniform worning with each task they mark off
[13:03] Speaker 2: they've completed it. It's the pen blue and the pen
[13:06] Speaker 2: is blue. But it was a real strange smudge on
[13:08] Speaker 2: the floor, and I was like, look, everyone right now,
[13:12] Speaker 2: just stop what you're doing. Everyone freeze. And it's a
[13:16] Speaker 2: bit like when someone's you know, stepped in ship. Everyone
[13:18] Speaker 2: has to like line up like suspects. And I'm like,
[13:21] Speaker 2: I'm just I checked before I did that. I checked.
[13:23] Speaker 2: My foot wasn't me So I was like, great.
[13:24] Speaker 1: Hey, you don't want to call that meeting.
[13:25] Speaker 2: They be like oh, And I was like, Marley foot
[13:29] Speaker 2: please cool, you're clear, Lola clear, poppy good, thanks, fuck
[13:34] Speaker 2: and just fine, carry on.
[13:37] Speaker 1: Skin is radiant, moving on.
[13:40] Speaker 2: And then I was like, Nana, Nana, he's a bit deaf.
[13:43] Speaker 2: So I was like, Nana, what is it? I said,
[13:48] Speaker 2: check your foot. She's not fucking blue ink or I
[13:51] Speaker 2: don't know how she's I think she stepped on the
[13:53] Speaker 2: pen whist making a sandwich for the kids lunchboxes. And
[13:57] Speaker 2: she's just got an ink like it's just built up
[13:59] Speaker 2: and foots like a sponge. It's just absorbed all this ink.
[14:03] Speaker 2: And she's now like smeared it all throughout that.
[14:05] Speaker 1: A shoe on.
[14:06] Speaker 2: She's barefoot.
[14:07] Speaker 1: She didn't feel it.
[14:08] Speaker 2: I had no idea.
[14:09] Speaker 5: She's she's got a bad sh leaving a footprint everywhere
[14:13] Speaker 5: and I was like, you know, mister deeds, how he
[14:15] Speaker 5: can't feel his foot feel it?
[14:21] Speaker 2: And I'm like, I'm not going to have it because
[14:22] Speaker 2: I was like, for fox sake, Nanna, and then she's
[14:25] Speaker 2: like what what is it? And she's like pacing up
[14:27] Speaker 2: and down. BE like, ah, she's smearing it more and
[14:30] Speaker 2: more and more.
[14:30] Speaker 1: I was like, stop moving, leaving a trail, like.
[14:33] Speaker 2: You know how they like the horses have their change.
[14:37] Speaker 2: I was like, had it from behind just grinding? Had
[14:40] Speaker 2: it locked in? I was like, stop wriggling. That's a
[14:43] Speaker 2: fucking cleaner.
[14:44] Speaker 1: What was it? What's the ink? Was it?
[14:46] Speaker 2: Like?
[14:46] Speaker 1: Was it permanent? No?
[14:47] Speaker 2: I thought.
[14:48] Speaker 1: I was like, I don't know what exactly was the
[14:49] Speaker 1: exact molecule make up over?
[14:51] Speaker 2: That was a German ink.
[14:54] Speaker 1: I'm getting old, Matthew. I've worked it out well. I
[14:56] Speaker 1: know that, okay, But I'm getting older technically, so as
[15:00] Speaker 1: soon as you're born, you're dying. That's that why I
[15:02] Speaker 1: put it. But I'm getting closer. I've been doing a
[15:05] Speaker 1: lot of work on the house, mainly on a floor,
[15:07] Speaker 1: and the floor means a.
[15:08] Speaker 2: Lot of finished.
[15:09] Speaker 1: No, No, I had to it's not finished. I had
[15:13] Speaker 1: to repaint the bedroom for another reason, but never right.
[15:15] Speaker 1: That took. That took a whole day, trust me. But
[15:17] Speaker 1: we're nearly finished. Were nearly there. But with the floor
[15:20] Speaker 1: there's a lot of bending over to be done. And
[15:22] Speaker 1: I'd been doing really well because I knew I knew
[15:25] Speaker 1: that I was going to be doing that, and I
[15:26] Speaker 1: knew that my lower back sometimes, as you know, can
[15:29] Speaker 1: throw it out quite a bit. But I actually threw
[15:32] Speaker 1: it out at under seven soccer training instead because I
[15:36] Speaker 1: tried to show off.
[15:36] Speaker 2: A little bit because you used to play semi professional soccer,
[15:39] Speaker 2: semi amateur professional for the belly Bears.
[15:43] Speaker 1: Wrong on so many what's my birthday a game? Yeah,
[15:47] Speaker 1: I'm wrong on so many levels. Pop quiz. Anyway, I
[15:54] Speaker 1: went down to training. There's a couple of other dads
[15:56] Speaker 1: down there as we do on a Thursday night, and
[15:59] Speaker 1: kids all doing their thing, and I was like, you
[16:00] Speaker 1: know what, I might as well take this opportunity this
[16:03] Speaker 1: hour on a Thursday while the kids are doing their training,
[16:06] Speaker 1: to have a kick around myself. You know, get the
[16:08] Speaker 1: heart rate up. You're a great dad, thank you. Get
[16:11] Speaker 1: the heart rate up, you know, not with the team
[16:13] Speaker 1: on my that noise, No, it was just you know,
[16:18] Speaker 1: helping out here and there where I came. When they
[16:20] Speaker 1: need me, They're like, ash, stop it, we don't need you,
[16:22] Speaker 1: we don't want you to help out. I'm like, I've
[16:24] Speaker 1: even bought boots, did you? I mean, I was going
[16:27] Speaker 1: to have a kick around. You know what, man.
[16:29] Speaker 2: Is a good daking great.
[16:31] Speaker 1: Yeah, that bliss is killing me, back, killing me, knees, ankles,
[16:35] Speaker 1: the whole thing is killing me. Anyway. So I'm like, yeah,
[16:37] Speaker 1: look at me. I go showing off a little bit,
[16:39] Speaker 1: went to do a big kick right foot, didn't even
[16:43] Speaker 1: get halfway through the back swing, and I was like,
[16:46] Speaker 1: I hadn't what who warms up? Like, let's who stretches.
[16:50] Speaker 1: Rick was telling me about the stretching classes. I was
[16:52] Speaker 1: forty five minute stretching class. Mine's like a forty five
[16:54] Speaker 1: second stretching class. I'm like, down, up, done anyway. On
[16:58] Speaker 1: the back swing, coming through borm right hand side, lower back,
[17:03] Speaker 1: it's like I've been shot at war, touchy subject. It's
[17:09] Speaker 1: like I've been shot at a fuck at war. Okay,
[17:12] Speaker 1: I was, I was in battle the heat of battle,
[17:15] Speaker 1: crack and shot. I will go in top corner, top corner.
[17:18] Speaker 1: But that was two weeks ago. I've been hobbling around
[17:22] Speaker 1: on this back for two weeks.
[17:24] Speaker 2: The physio, No, what are they gonna do?
[17:26] Speaker 1: I think physios are a bit of a scam take
[17:28] Speaker 1: my money? Yeah, just giving you a look.
[17:30] Speaker 3: Why do you think physios are a scam?
[17:32] Speaker 1: We've been we've been through this. Just they're they're just backs.
[17:34] Speaker 2: They just you know, you go in there, they have
[17:37] Speaker 2: a quick chat, give you a little rub, tell you
[17:39] Speaker 2: to touch your toes, and then all we'll see in
[17:41] Speaker 2: another three weeks. Buck, it's so much money, like fix me,
[17:45] Speaker 2: fix me.
[17:46] Speaker 1: Yeah, they're like they do is send you home with homework. Yes,
[17:49] Speaker 1: sorry to all the physios out there, but it's fucking true.
[17:51] Speaker 2: Honestly, the work you guys do and your profession is
[17:54] Speaker 2: just outstanding.
[17:55] Speaker 1: For who like workers calm Maybe, I don't know, for
[17:58] Speaker 1: people who need it mainly did Oscar?
[18:01] Speaker 2: More importantly, when you took this shot, did Oscar your
[18:04] Speaker 2: son did it? Ah?
[18:06] Speaker 1: One of the other dads saw it and he was
[18:08] Speaker 1: like that was great, and then so how many dads.
[18:10] Speaker 2: Rock up with football boots on one?
[18:15] Speaker 1: Anyway, I masked it. I masked my pain, and at
[18:18] Speaker 1: this point I'm like warmed up a little bit. So
[18:20] Speaker 1: I can get through. But then later on after the
[18:21] Speaker 1: kids going to bed, and I hobbled into the bedroom,
[18:25] Speaker 1: what Fu's wrong with you? And I'm like, oh god,
[18:27] Speaker 1: sports related injury. You wouldn't understand. She was like, you
[18:30] Speaker 1: don't play sport. You just watch your kid play sport.
[18:33] Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, yeah, I was. I was
[18:36] Speaker 1: kicking the ball with one of the other dads. She
[18:37] Speaker 1: was like, ah, here we go, showing off. So yeah,
[18:40] Speaker 1: I've been hobbling around because I threw my back out
[18:43] Speaker 1: at under seven soccer training.
[18:45] Speaker 2: And that's what you get for trying to be an
[18:46] Speaker 2: involved dad. Right, You're like getting punished for showing up,
[18:51] Speaker 2: being present. Life's not fair. I know.
[18:53] Speaker 1: It's like it's like they just knocked me down in
[18:55] Speaker 1: my prime. I'm like, you know, I'm out here. I'll
[18:57] Speaker 1: get out there. I'll be that active dad. You might
[18:59] Speaker 1: as well just sit on the care o. I'm not
[19:00] Speaker 1: going to get hurt. I reckon.
[19:03] Speaker 3: It would be so common that dad's just thinking this still.
[19:09] Speaker 1: Dialogue again to the listeners, watch your pathetic injury. Remember
[19:13] Speaker 1: we did that because I had a pathetic injury. This
[19:16] Speaker 1: is going to be a little bit vulgar. Vick I'm sorry,
[19:19] Speaker 1: ash vulgar. What okay? Can I tell the story or
[19:23] Speaker 1: are we going to be disgusted? Are we going to
[19:25] Speaker 1: look at me differently afterwards?
[19:27] Speaker 3: But already close.
[19:28] Speaker 1: When April and I lived in an apartment a few
[19:31] Speaker 1: years back, I think, and we have one of those
[19:33] Speaker 1: bathtub shower combinations. You know what I'm talking about. You
[19:37] Speaker 1: can get quite slippery. I don't know if I want
[19:39] Speaker 1: to tell this story now. Actually i've started.
[19:41] Speaker 2: I have a think about it. Nana. We have a
[19:43] Speaker 2: slip mat that Nana. It suctions onto the and so
[19:48] Speaker 2: it's like an octopus, the little suction cap. So after
[19:51] Speaker 2: she's finished, I've got to, like I know the ones yet,
[19:54] Speaker 2: and then I've got to like hang it out and
[19:56] Speaker 2: dry it, and then I don't do it. Then it
[19:59] Speaker 2: does it itself.
[20:02] Speaker 1: Look, mine might be a bit disgusting.
[20:04] Speaker 3: Did you break your penis?
[20:05] Speaker 1: No, it's penis related. Though I I was home alone.
[20:12] Speaker 1: Let me just preface the story with that I was
[20:14] Speaker 1: home alone. The mood has struck Victoria VICKI and I
[20:20] Speaker 1: have ejaculated into the bathtub pre shower, and then I've
[20:27] Speaker 1: stepped into the shower, slipped on it the room back
[20:31] Speaker 1: out and then I had to go to work the
[20:36] Speaker 1: next day and I was going to come and I
[20:40] Speaker 1: remember hobbling around and someone was like, oh, I was like, yeah,
[20:42] Speaker 1: you know, like that, are you good? You know, no
[20:45] Speaker 1: one ever knew that story, and that was the story.
[20:47] Speaker 1: I just played it off as I was doing some
[20:49] Speaker 1: work around the house. I was doing some work around
[20:51] Speaker 1: the house, all right, thank you, Vick. I was doing
[20:56] Speaker 1: some self improvement anyway. So I've stepped in. And you
[21:01] Speaker 1: know when you sleep on a freak, when you sleep
[21:03] Speaker 1: on a banana peel, like in the in like a cartoon.
[21:06] Speaker 1: That's what was like legs in the air downstairs.
[21:12] Speaker 2: Let's come related, laying in your own bodily fluids? Literally,
[21:16] Speaker 2: and then.
[21:16] Speaker 1: How do you clean that off? You're like, oh well,
[21:19] Speaker 1: I'm like, it won't come on. I still feel dirty.
[21:23] Speaker 1: Actually I feel clean. That that story is out in
[21:25] Speaker 1: the open. Now I feel better about myself. So that's
[21:28] Speaker 1: that's that's fresh for you guys.
[21:30] Speaker 3: That must have been really frustrating that you were the
[21:33] Speaker 3: cause of that injury.
[21:34] Speaker 1: Oh I was beside myself. I cried in the bottom
[21:37] Speaker 1: of the bath covered and com do.
[21:39] Speaker 3: They feel just like that?
[21:41] Speaker 1: You doesn't even know this story.
[21:42] Speaker 2: That's how you usually masturbate anyway, So yeah, no different.
[21:47] Speaker 1: Cry before. It's different anyway, Vick. You've got now you
[21:53] Speaker 1: reveal something about yourself to make me feel better.
[21:58] Speaker 2: What have you got for us? You got a little
[21:59] Speaker 2: note in here? Got an update?
[22:01] Speaker 3: Oh look, it's not breaking news because we are going
[22:03] Speaker 3: to keep breaking news to the normal Wednesday EPP. But
[22:06] Speaker 3: I was on my drive into work today and I
[22:07] Speaker 3: heard Maddy j get called out on not only any podcast,
[22:12] Speaker 3: it's one I love listening to every week, but it's
[22:13] Speaker 3: actually Australia's number one podcast.
[22:16] Speaker 1: Mum and me never heard of it, got called out
[22:21] Speaker 1: or shouted out reference.
[22:22] Speaker 3: Reference going on in terms of parenting and making dadding
[22:26] Speaker 3: look cool for the next gen. I thought it was
[22:30] Speaker 3: a pretty good shout actually, so I thought we have
[22:33] Speaker 3: a listen.
[22:33] Speaker 6: I think it's probably really good news that that young
[22:36] Speaker 6: men are all things they want.
[22:37] Speaker 1: To be dads.
[22:38] Speaker 6: And I think that's because dadding looks a lot more
[22:40] Speaker 6: fun than it used to.
[22:42] Speaker 1: Millennial dads spend three.
[22:43] Speaker 6: Times more time with their children than their grandfathers would
[22:47] Speaker 6: have done. And like, think of the Hamish Blakes, and
[22:50] Speaker 6: think of the guys who are out there making dadding
[22:52] Speaker 6: look look really fun.
[22:53] Speaker 1: What's his name?
[22:53] Speaker 2: Matt?
[22:54] Speaker 1: Naddy Ja, Naddy Jay.
[22:56] Speaker 6: Like we're always saying how we need more good male
[22:59] Speaker 6: role models.
[23:00] Speaker 2: What's his name?
[23:01] Speaker 1: What's his name? Buddy?
[23:06] Speaker 2: You know, Hamis is so amazing. I don't have a
[23:11] Speaker 2: little you know, I was crying on such a minute.
[23:18] Speaker 1: Also also releases the podcast every week about dads. What's
[23:21] Speaker 1: his name? Hamish has like one two seasons of a
[23:24] Speaker 1: podcast with his mates about dads, And it was like, that's.
[23:35] Speaker 2: He's going a good job.
[23:36] Speaker 1: You got to mention what's the man going to do
[23:39] Speaker 1: over here?
[23:42] Speaker 3: I thought it was very cool and I would agree
[23:44] Speaker 3: as a mom and that you guys are making dads
[23:47] Speaker 3: look cool and you're making it look good.
[23:50] Speaker 2: I would also argue that point though, especially what we
[23:53] Speaker 2: cut down from the podcast. It's always like and then
[23:57] Speaker 2: the fucking kids were crying over and ice creamed up
[23:59] Speaker 2: a little ship.
[24:00] Speaker 1: Yeah, but the cool thing is Matt that we're there
[24:02] Speaker 1: to see it.
[24:03] Speaker 2: Yes, thanks to our forefathers, the granddads, who have just
[24:07] Speaker 2: done a great job of setting the bar so incredibly low.
[24:11] Speaker 1: Yeah, they're like, hey, tell you what we should do.
[24:12] Speaker 1: Let's put the bar here lower.
[24:16] Speaker 2: They were so low that they weren't even in the
[24:18] Speaker 2: room when the child was.
[24:19] Speaker 1: Born and we were at the pub, and then she
[24:22] Speaker 1: gave birth when I was wet in the head. Was
[24:24] Speaker 1: great for me anyway, and I was hungover for the
[24:26] Speaker 1: next week. So anyway, it's not hard to beat, is it.
[24:29] Speaker 1: I suppose.
[24:29] Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like three times is like? What's that?
[24:32] Speaker 1: Once a week is three times more?
[24:36] Speaker 2: Ah, thank you number me are out loud for the
[24:40] Speaker 2: beautiful reference.
[24:41] Speaker 1: Yeah, Maddie who what's his name again?
[24:42] Speaker 2: Maddie who?
[24:44] Speaker 1: They said it was Madden. Someone was like Maddie Ja.
[24:46] Speaker 1: So Claire Claire shout out to.
[24:50] Speaker 2: To what's her name?
[24:51] Speaker 1: To what's the name? Once I say his name, what's
[24:53] Speaker 1: the other one's name?
[24:54] Speaker 2: Claire love Claire. She's great, She's great. They're all fantastic.
[24:59] Speaker 1: Just on that, like cool daddy. I've heard the new
[25:02] Speaker 1: dad shoe and I'm gonna throw myself under the bus
[25:03] Speaker 1: here because you guys pointed it out the other day.
[25:05] Speaker 1: The new dad shoe is the Vans, is it? Yeah?
[25:08] Speaker 1: Someone was like, the new dad shoe, I don't have
[25:13] Speaker 1: Belgrove Vand I actually I was looking.
[25:17] Speaker 2: I was, and not because you wore them. I was
[25:19] Speaker 2: looking for a check pair of v Why don't you
[25:22] Speaker 2: just why.
[25:22] Speaker 1: Don't you just move into my house and sleep in
[25:25] Speaker 1: my fucking bed?
[25:26] Speaker 2: I was. I was looking at the original videos of
[25:29] Speaker 2: us when we when we were looking at doing the
[25:31] Speaker 2: video the Mother's Day video, I got some videos of
[25:34] Speaker 2: Laura at the same time, looked at old videos of
[25:36] Speaker 2: us from when we first started, when I didn't have
[25:38] Speaker 2: a mustache, and I thought, maybe it's time, maybe it's
[25:41] Speaker 2: time to like differentiate myself.
[25:43] Speaker 1: I didn't even notice it because it's just part of you, now,
[25:46] Speaker 1: don't you.
[25:47] Speaker 2: I think it's time time for change.
[25:48] Speaker 1: Be sacking me. You're gonna mention on that podcast You're
[25:52] Speaker 1: out of here more memorable.
[25:55] Speaker 2: Hey, this afternoon is a very exciting day because first
[26:00] Speaker 2: time of school of this year, we scaled back all
[26:02] Speaker 2: the activities for the kids. We were like, let's just
[26:05] Speaker 2: strip it right back to bare bones. And the girls
[26:08] Speaker 2: I've been trying to understand. I want them to be
[26:10] Speaker 2: passionate about something. So Mali Stilla does dance, it's in
[26:13] Speaker 2: the morning, but Lolla at the moment, she doesn't have
[26:15] Speaker 2: any activity. We tried soccer last year, didn't do that well,
[26:19] Speaker 2: and I was trying to get a feel for what
[26:21] Speaker 2: they wanted to do. Okay, and they've decided we've landed
[26:24] Speaker 2: on gymnastics.
[26:26] Speaker 1: Didn't they do gymnastics before?
[26:28] Speaker 2: They did do it before they were at school. I
[26:29] Speaker 2: used to do gymnastics with them and it was grays
[26:32] Speaker 2: easy because you could just do it like in the afternoon.
[26:35] Speaker 1: It's just like an activity for it.
[26:36] Speaker 2: Yeah, and I loved it because on the days that
[26:38] Speaker 2: I was with them, it's just, you know, we will
[26:39] Speaker 2: do that in the afternoon. It sucks up a couple
[26:41] Speaker 2: of hours. They loved it, but we put a pause
[26:43] Speaker 2: on gymnastics. Gymnastics is about to start. They got a
[26:46] Speaker 2: class with their cousin. My sister had a drump shas
[26:50] Speaker 2: mcgaz sister does a drop off. I did the pick
[26:52] Speaker 2: up just heaven all the way. I may have like
[26:57] Speaker 2: left pretty last minute. I've been trying to text the
[26:59] Speaker 2: owner of the gym to be like, can we get in? Yeah?
[27:02] Speaker 1: Please, Maddie watched his name?
[27:04] Speaker 2: Can we get in from Frank Jay?
[27:07] Speaker 1: Let me in? You know Hamies Blake, Oh wow, good
[27:14] Speaker 1: thing your Microsoft man.
[27:16] Speaker 2: I don't know how many times you expect me to
[27:18] Speaker 2: laugh at myself.
[27:19] Speaker 1: Vig I thought it was very funny, Ali barbar mad.
[27:25] Speaker 2: It's going to be great because Marley's version, well, according
[27:29] Speaker 2: to you, I am five minutes ago.
[27:30] Speaker 1: What's lower than that? I'm just kidding.
[27:34] Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's great because Marley will finally, finally after
[27:38] Speaker 2: so many months of struggling in the backyard, indoors, even cartwheels.
[27:43] Speaker 1: I forgot about the cart wheels? Can you cart?
[27:46] Speaker 2: Will?
[27:47] Speaker 1: Please?
[27:48] Speaker 2: Come on?
[27:48] Speaker 1: I did remember.
[27:49] Speaker 3: He's like a legend at that apparently.
[27:51] Speaker 1: I according to him, I did gymnastics for four years. Yeah,
[27:54] Speaker 1: just ask me. I did it for one year when
[27:56] Speaker 1: I was like six as well. How old were you
[27:59] Speaker 1: when you did it?
[28:00] Speaker 2: We'll do a handstand competition after that. Can you do it? Like?
[28:02] Speaker 2: Can you?
[28:02] Speaker 1: I don't need to compete with you because I know
[28:04] Speaker 1: I can't do it. Just so you know, what do
[28:06] Speaker 1: you want to see? I want to see a flip flip.
[28:08] Speaker 1: I can't do a flip, but I can I can
[28:10] Speaker 1: do a flip. What actually have you seen the guy
[28:13] Speaker 1: who the highest? I don't want to see back fleet.
[28:15] Speaker 1: I don't want to see it, oh man, I don't
[28:17] Speaker 1: want to see it anyway, Go on, cartwheels, I can't cutwheel.
[28:20] Speaker 2: So she's still to this day has not been able
[28:22] Speaker 2: to master the cartwheel.
[28:23] Speaker 3: Well, good timing then, because we got a Dodo who
[28:26] Speaker 3: wrote in actually, and she said it was Britt. She said,
[28:29] Speaker 3: I was just listening to your January episode a little
[28:32] Speaker 3: bit late where you spoke about trying to teach your
[28:34] Speaker 3: daughter a cartwheel. I felt compelled to send you a
[28:37] Speaker 3: quick little voice note about how you might be able
[28:39] Speaker 3: to help her as I used to be a gym coach.
[28:42] Speaker 3: Feel free to share this on the pot if you like.
[28:44] Speaker 3: Either way, I hope it helps you. Love the pod guys.
[28:47] Speaker 3: I'm not a parent, but I am a teacher and
[28:50] Speaker 3: love hearing your stories.
[28:51] Speaker 2: Love that. Also, Sorry it took long to reply here. January.
[28:55] Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, right, No, I think she was listening to
[28:57] Speaker 1: it late. I honestly think that I forget. I feel
[29:00] Speaker 1: like it's gone so fast that it's like feb Now
[29:02] Speaker 1: it's made.
[29:06] Speaker 4: Don't start that, all right, take a listen to this, hey,
[29:09] Speaker 4: Maddie Jay, Hey, Ash, I was just listening to your
[29:12] Speaker 4: episode from January where you were talking about trying to teach.
[29:16] Speaker 1: Your daughter a cartwill, and as.
[29:19] Speaker 7: An ex gym coach, I would say the best piece
[29:23] Speaker 7: of advice that I could give you is to use
[29:26] Speaker 7: some masking tape and draw out a circle on the floor.
[29:30] Speaker 7: And you were one hundred percent right, Maddie in saying
[29:34] Speaker 7: hand hand, foot foot, because that shows them how.
[29:38] Speaker 8: They should be using their bodies in using both hands
[29:41] Speaker 8: first and then feet after. And it's okay if she's
[29:44] Speaker 8: jumping two feet at the same time, because that does
[29:47] Speaker 8: come before the second part.
[29:50] Speaker 7: But by doing the circle, it means that they don't
[29:52] Speaker 7: need to try and get their legs up straight straight away,
[29:54] Speaker 7: which is the really challenging part. So if they stand
[29:57] Speaker 7: on the circle facing inwards, they put their hands next
[30:01] Speaker 7: to them on the circle, and then they jump their
[30:04] Speaker 7: feet to the other side of that circle, it's a
[30:07] Speaker 7: little bit easier to navigate that shape building. And then
[30:11] Speaker 7: what you can do is, as they're getting it by
[30:13] Speaker 7: going handhand, foot, foot, you can make the circle bigger
[30:16] Speaker 7: and bigger and bigger until it.
[30:18] Speaker 6: Ends up being a line and then hopefully that.
[30:21] Speaker 7: Will help her. So good luck, thank you, well done
[30:24] Speaker 7: on training so far you're doing.
[30:27] Speaker 1: Really it's a recording.
[30:28] Speaker 2: Thank you.
[30:29] Speaker 1: You didn't call in yep, thank you, yep. I didn't
[30:39] Speaker 1: understand any.
[30:39] Speaker 2: Of that as a gymnast, someone who's very familiar with
[30:42] Speaker 2: the training techniques required the cart wheels. I understood that
[30:45] Speaker 2: I will use that method at home, so thank you
[30:48] Speaker 2: appreciate it.
[30:48] Speaker 1: I can't wait to see the results. To be honest,
[30:50] Speaker 1: I would try a cartwheel and I bung both shoulders.
[30:53] Speaker 1: My back would be farked again. I'm not even gonna try.
[30:56] Speaker 1: I could do a roly poly on a nice soft
[30:58] Speaker 1: mat losers really good to lie down and great at
[31:01] Speaker 1: that seduce me. You're just trying to seduce me with
[31:04] Speaker 1: your cart wheels, Matthew, it is time for perant.
[31:10] Speaker 2: It's been so long, so many segments. Let's let's dig
[31:16] Speaker 2: out the interest song. Rick.
[31:21] Speaker 1: I want to be pres you say what, man, I
[31:27] Speaker 1: feel like a parent.
[31:30] Speaker 2: Gosh, I'm gonna start with a personal if that's okay,
[31:34] Speaker 2: and I've like, it's just really crept into the vocabulary
[31:38] Speaker 2: of my kids, and it's really starting to annoy me
[31:42] Speaker 2: a lot, a lot. I don't know if your kids
[31:44] Speaker 2: do this, but any time I've got to say, hey, guys,
[31:49] Speaker 2: we're now stopping this activity, and we're doing this as
[31:52] Speaker 2: an example. Hey, it's now time to like brush your teeth, Okay,
[31:58] Speaker 2: so stop what you're doing right now, stop coloring in,
[32:01] Speaker 2: brush your teeth. Let's go just one second, just one second,
[32:05] Speaker 2: every single.
[32:08] Speaker 1: Time, or it I just gotta, I just gotta, I
[32:12] Speaker 1: just got you just gotta brush your fucking teeth. And
[32:15] Speaker 1: that's where I end up every time.
[32:16] Speaker 2: I always I always get like what they watch Bluey
[32:19] Speaker 2: is that they're really into Bluey right now, loving Bluey,
[32:21] Speaker 2: and so I always say I always give them like
[32:23] Speaker 2: a warning and say I turn it off, like like
[32:26] Speaker 2: the OnCore. Right, it's like the person saying that's it,
[32:29] Speaker 2: concert's finished, and you.
[32:30] Speaker 1: Give us one one more song and they.
[32:33] Speaker 2: Come out do the on Core. I'm like, kids, Bluey
[32:36] Speaker 2: is over, and they're like one more episode, okay, last
[32:39] Speaker 2: one though, little Tree.
[32:41] Speaker 1: Just quietly, I'm off blue But anyway, moving on, dare
[32:43] Speaker 1: you you'll know what?
[32:45] Speaker 2: And then episode finishes. Okay, now it's time to go upstairs,
[32:49] Speaker 2: off to bed. One second, one second for what what
[32:53] Speaker 2: do you fucking up to do?
[32:54] Speaker 1: I don't even know how long A second is.
[32:56] Speaker 2: Just just just fucking listen to me and do what you.
[32:59] Speaker 1: Tell It's so yeah, it is infuriating when it's like
[33:03] Speaker 1: I've already told you ten times and I've given you
[33:05] Speaker 1: the benefit of the doubt and then it's a one
[33:08] Speaker 1: second or I've just got to do I've just got
[33:11] Speaker 1: as you ever go?
[33:13] Speaker 2: Have you? Did you wipe your bottom off to have
[33:14] Speaker 2: gone on the toilet? One second?
[33:16] Speaker 1: Just no, no, asked them how long minute? How long
[33:21] Speaker 1: a second is? How long do you think a secondary?
[33:24] Speaker 1: They won't have a clue. They just they've picked it
[33:26] Speaker 1: up from probably.
[33:29] Speaker 2: I know.
[33:30] Speaker 1: I'm like, it drives me nuts. I'm just like, I've
[33:33] Speaker 1: asked you to do something. Do it not just just
[33:36] Speaker 1: just fair rants you fair rant pair rant. It's on
[33:41] Speaker 1: from Jess. I've got a perant about r s V
[33:44] Speaker 1: ping to invitations. Do people just not RSV to anything anymore? Guilty?
[33:50] Speaker 1: Especially kids party? Am I holding a party for two
[33:53] Speaker 1: kids that are RSPP or the other twenty that haven't
[33:57] Speaker 1: but will rock up anyway? What is the etiquette? Are
[34:01] Speaker 1: we chasing people via text or something to see if
[34:04] Speaker 1: they're coming? Or do we just leave and hope people
[34:07] Speaker 1: haven't forgotten and rock up?
[34:10] Speaker 2: Can I just put my hand up here and apologize
[34:13] Speaker 2: to all of the birthday parties that I've attended because
[34:16] Speaker 2: I am very guilty of going. Oh how lovely on
[34:19] Speaker 2: Saturday at thirteenth the birthday party will be there for
[34:21] Speaker 2: sure in my head. And then I'm like, oh RSVP
[34:25] Speaker 2: in a second, and you forget and I forget. And
[34:27] Speaker 2: then the day of the party, I'm like, oh, by
[34:28] Speaker 2: the way, we're coming. Is that all right?
[34:31] Speaker 1: They're like, we're gonna have to cancel the party. The
[34:33] Speaker 1: Johnson's are coming.
[34:34] Speaker 2: Yeah. I need to be better. And you know, I'll
[34:37] Speaker 2: admit I'm not perfect. Shock horror.
[34:39] Speaker 1: I have no idea there's any party is happening whatsoever
[34:42] Speaker 1: until the day before and I was like, Mace's got
[34:44] Speaker 1: a party tomorrow. Am I taking her? You're taking it?
[34:46] Speaker 1: She's done all the hard work. If someone's like so
[34:48] Speaker 1: and so is having a party, I'm like, oh great,
[34:50] Speaker 1: it's out of my mind. I haven't registered it anymore.
[34:53] Speaker 1: Probably need to step up a bit more, bro, I
[34:55] Speaker 1: might need to. I agree.
[34:57] Speaker 3: Yeah, I am the one who has to do all
[34:59] Speaker 3: the RSP and I feel like I've got so much
[35:01] Speaker 3: in my brain.
[35:02] Speaker 1: I'm like, why can't he do something? I don't know
[35:04] Speaker 1: that they've just stoppedn't telling me. People have stopped telling
[35:06] Speaker 1: me about their parties because they're like, if you tell
[35:08] Speaker 1: Ash no one's coming.
[35:09] Speaker 2: You know, it's just.
[35:12] Speaker 1: Well, I'm just saying, at least I'm honest, perfect man.
[35:14] Speaker 1: Over there, He's just like, well, you just told me
[35:17] Speaker 1: that you do the same a second ago, and I
[35:21] Speaker 1: hear I am thinking this is a safe space. And
[35:23] Speaker 1: when I say I do the same thing, You're like, well,
[35:25] Speaker 1: you're just a fucking shit Like you know every h
[35:29] Speaker 1: you keep taking the missing out on parties. No one's
[35:31] Speaker 1: missed the party. No one's mister present because of my wife.
[35:34] Speaker 1: And she's great at that, that's one of her strengths.
[35:36] Speaker 2: At least. The floorboards are done well, not entirely.
[35:43] Speaker 1: There's a few spots, hold me a spots to not
[35:45] Speaker 1: even like, oh, behind the wardrobe over there, there's a
[35:47] Speaker 1: spot in the middle of the living room that's literally
[35:50] Speaker 1: a bare concrete.
[35:53] Speaker 2: Okay, this one's from Taylor. Taylor, thank you so much
[35:56] Speaker 2: for writing in. Has anyone ever received their family photos back? Like, oh, fuck,
[36:00] Speaker 2: I've got a book in my family photos Jesus, Oh.
[36:02] Speaker 1: You really need to step up a bit. I was
[36:08] Speaker 1: waiting and you booked in.
[36:12] Speaker 2: How many family photos.
[36:13] Speaker 1: Have you booked?
[36:14] Speaker 2: Inas?
[36:14] Speaker 1: Can you book me? By the way, Vic does great
[36:18] Speaker 1: family photos if you're not photos taken.
[36:20] Speaker 2: Sorry school photos for me?
[36:22] Speaker 1: But does that to you? She's at home, she's home,
[36:26] Speaker 1: she's not working at the moment, she's having a nice
[36:28] Speaker 1: all time off doing that sort of stuff. She loves it.
[36:31] Speaker 1: What fuck? Who's gonna do it?
[36:34] Speaker 2: Then?
[36:34] Speaker 1: I can't do it. I have ADHD. It's a disorder.
[36:39] Speaker 2: Don't don't use out to enable bad behavior.
[36:41] Speaker 1: Bro, shut up and read it.
[36:43] Speaker 2: Has anyone ever received their family photos back and thought, oh,
[36:47] Speaker 2: what a magical time that was? Because for me, it's no.
[36:52] Speaker 2: It's as if the day was doomed as soon as
[36:54] Speaker 2: I said, okay, guys, we have family photos today, let's
[36:57] Speaker 2: have some fun time. Not only was the lead up
[37:00] Speaker 2: shit show, My son decided that today was the day
[37:03] Speaker 2: to grow a full blown teenage attitude and lose his smile.
[37:06] Speaker 2: My ten month old wouldn't keep anything in her hair,
[37:09] Speaker 2: and my husband and I argued through gritted teeth the
[37:13] Speaker 2: entire time. Can't wait to see the happy family rolled
[37:17] Speaker 2: out onto my walls with all the smiles, with good
[37:19] Speaker 2: mustard and pretend like the day wasn't something out of
[37:21] Speaker 2: a parent horror show.
[37:23] Speaker 1: This is a good one for Vic, actually, Vic, because
[37:25] Speaker 1: you do a lot of family photos. Yeah, like what's
[37:28] Speaker 1: the combination, what's the.
[37:29] Speaker 2: Mixture of, what's the ratio of divorce, post familyship.
[37:33] Speaker 1: What's the mixture of, Like everyone really happy to be there,
[37:36] Speaker 1: and obviously everyone the mood is tense.
[37:38] Speaker 2: Look Frank, just fucking smile with the kids, Look franky, Jane,
[37:42] Speaker 2: just smile. I reckon.
[37:44] Speaker 3: Most families turn up very stress and have been fighting
[37:47] Speaker 3: the whole way in because even when I get my
[37:49] Speaker 3: own photos, like it is really hard getting to like
[37:53] Speaker 3: a beach, for example, on time, with the kid's dressed,
[37:55] Speaker 3: hair done nicely. Your partner helping sounds like my worst
[37:59] Speaker 3: line mare. I can see it when they're coming like
[38:01] Speaker 3: down to the I can just see it on their faces.
[38:04] Speaker 3: It's been a stressful time to get there, and I
[38:06] Speaker 3: get it, and so my job then is to calm
[38:09] Speaker 3: them and like help them shake it off. And most
[38:11] Speaker 3: of my clients do say that was so fun. It
[38:13] Speaker 3: didn't even feel like we're on a photo shoot, and like,
[38:16] Speaker 3: yes we were rushing or yes we were late, but
[38:18] Speaker 3: that kind of doesn't matter, Like we have an hour,
[38:21] Speaker 3: but you only need like a short time to get
[38:24] Speaker 3: those really good.
[38:24] Speaker 2: Photos because like years down the track, You'll forget about
[38:28] Speaker 2: the arguments and you look at.
[38:29] Speaker 1: That man hold onto that ship, and you'll go.
[38:34] Speaker 2: Look at the kids, so young.
[38:35] Speaker 1: And happy, and remember when honestly, no offense. Vick doing
[38:43] Speaker 1: a family portrait down the beach sounds like my worst
[38:45] Speaker 1: night man.
[38:46] Speaker 2: But if it does, sound great.
[38:48] Speaker 1: But if that's your jam, you can book in with
[38:50] Speaker 1: yug yum. If that's what you're into, then book with Vick.
[38:53] Speaker 1: You can find her on.
[38:55] Speaker 3: Victoria owns photography dot com dot you up accepted that.
[39:00] Speaker 1: Oh God, make you love it? No, no, because you
[39:02] Speaker 1: will just make my wife do it, and then she'll
[39:04] Speaker 1: make me do it, and then, trust me, that won't
[39:07] Speaker 1: end well for you. I'm like, we'll be in a record.
[39:10] Speaker 1: We'll do a two hour record. Edit it now.
[39:13] Speaker 3: I reckon one out of ten dads actually want to
[39:15] Speaker 3: do the photo shoot. Okay, but I would say.
[39:18] Speaker 2: I've always wanted to.
[39:20] Speaker 1: There's your one right there.
[39:22] Speaker 3: But then they all walk out of it and say, actually,
[39:24] Speaker 3: that wasn't as bad as I was expecting because the
[39:26] Speaker 3: photos that I take you're not looking at a camera smiling,
[39:29] Speaker 3: You're just playing with kids, and I'm getting the photos
[39:31] Speaker 3: of it.
[39:31] Speaker 1: I don't want to play with. Is it comfortable doing smiling,
[39:36] Speaker 1: just being a person, jolly, being jolly, I love you.
[39:40] Speaker 1: Shut up, you're so mean. But I get it. I
[39:46] Speaker 1: don't don't. I don't oose want to be photographed like
[39:49] Speaker 1: I would much rather dose.
[39:50] Speaker 2: People comment right now a lot about how good you're looking.
[39:53] Speaker 1: I look great all the time, but I on camera,
[39:56] Speaker 1: like filming film me, I'm all about what what's going on.
[40:00] Speaker 1: I don't know you really get under you really.
[40:02] Speaker 2: Get a compliment. I just said, everyone's saying you look.
[40:05] Speaker 1: Good, but then you gestured a big like that'll fucking
[40:08] Speaker 1: that'll get me in the good books. I don't believe
[40:11] Speaker 1: a word that comes to any out all right, I
[40:14] Speaker 1: mean that, but on video. But I don't mind being
[40:16] Speaker 1: if someone's like, we're gonna video this, fine, But as
[40:20] Speaker 1: soon as someone's like, oh, we're going to do a
[40:21] Speaker 1: photo shoot, I'm like, oh, lose my soul, literally my brain.
[40:24] Speaker 1: My brain's like fuck this, like seriously, like school actually
[40:27] Speaker 1: can't tell your funny story about school photos please quickly.
[40:30] Speaker 1: And this just keeping in mind, this is my teenage years,
[40:34] Speaker 1: and teenagers are the worst, as we know. And it
[40:38] Speaker 1: was the years where it was like you would all
[40:40] Speaker 1: sneak out and drink and stuff like that away from anyway,
[40:45] Speaker 1: we had an ongoing thing where you would shape someone's
[40:48] Speaker 1: eyebrow whoever passed out first. So a friend of mine, Calum,
[40:51] Speaker 1: his name is let's go, let's call him Calum because
[40:53] Speaker 1: he is calm. He had really bushy eyebrows and he
[40:56] Speaker 1: passed out first one night, and it was the weekend
[40:58] Speaker 1: before the school photos, and one of the boys shaved
[41:01] Speaker 1: off one of his eyebrows. Anyway, he was a good
[41:03] Speaker 1: sport about it. But then really his mum realized that
[41:06] Speaker 1: school photo and his mum was really upset about it
[41:09] Speaker 1: and made him draw an eyebrow on with a permanent marker.
[41:12] Speaker 1: So his school photos with that whole year and his
[41:14] Speaker 1: school I did was normal eyebrow and a permanent marker.
[41:18] Speaker 1: And it was thick too.
[41:20] Speaker 2: It was thick.
[41:22] Speaker 1: It was so good. Anyway, he embraced it in the end.
[41:25] Speaker 1: But it's a it's a very funny story.
[41:27] Speaker 3: That's just teenage cruelty.
[41:28] Speaker 1: At it was the mum that hated it more than him.
[41:31] Speaker 3: He was like that to my son, I would be
[41:35] Speaker 3: he shaved it.
[41:36] Speaker 2: No, he must have really been having a good sleep
[41:44] Speaker 2: he was having a very would you use like a
[41:46] Speaker 2: little big razor or?
[41:48] Speaker 1: Yeah, it was just like a chic.
[41:49] Speaker 2: Was that chic?
[41:50] Speaker 1: He had quite thick eyebrows, just took.
[41:52] Speaker 2: It's like ash my good friend, best friend, you could say,
[41:59] Speaker 2: so one who has never looked more handsome than what
[42:01] Speaker 2: he does right now. Always a pleasure.
[42:03] Speaker 1: Knock me down for an hour straight and then two
[42:05] Speaker 1: seconds be like and you're a great guy, goodbye.
[42:08] Speaker 2: This is this is like my relationship with Nana. I'm like,
[42:10] Speaker 2: get it, go the fucking way. God, you told me
[42:13] Speaker 2: that story twelve times already. And then it gets like
[42:15] Speaker 2: night time and I'm like, good night, I love you, mummy.
[42:17] Speaker 1: People are gonna start talking. Peoplere gonna start talking about
[42:19] Speaker 1: you know, the not Yeah.
[42:22] Speaker 2: Like what's his name?
[42:23] Speaker 1: Yeah, Reggie J. He's not a very nice guy, is he.
[42:27] Speaker 2: That's an episode done. And if you enjoyed this episode.
[42:30] Speaker 2: I haven't had a review in a while. Not gonna
[42:32] Speaker 2: lie on podcast.
[42:34] Speaker 3: No.
[42:36] Speaker 1: I don't do it for reviews, man, I just do
[42:38] Speaker 1: it for the love of the game. I just chat
[42:40] Speaker 1: for the love of the game, talking to you guys
[42:41] Speaker 1: out there. So if you you know what, if you
[42:43] Speaker 1: love the game as much as me. Go and leave
[42:45] Speaker 1: a review and subscribe, or they can find us on socials.
[42:47] Speaker 1: We're at Man two.
[42:48] Speaker 2: Doting Days, Instagram, TikTok. There's a Facebook group as well,
[42:51] Speaker 2: which is just It is one hell of a place
[42:53] Speaker 2: to be.
[42:54] Speaker 1: See what I did there? Would I bring the listener
[42:57] Speaker 1: back in?
[42:57] Speaker 2: You did? You did? You're very good? Read what you do?
[43:01] Speaker 1: Thank you? Keep going.
[43:05] Speaker 2: And we will get out of here and see you
[43:07] Speaker 2: guys on Wednesday.
[43:09] Speaker 1: They won't see us, they will hear us, but great,
[43:11] Speaker 1: yes some of them will see it on social.
[43:16] Speaker 2: You Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of
[43:38] Speaker 2: country throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.
[43:43] Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
[43:45] Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Island
[43:48] Speaker 1: the people's today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land

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