# We Egged Our Bosses' House

An episode of [Hamish & Andy Plus +](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1616749262), 25 May 2022, 19 min.

Audio: https://enrichment.soundstack.com/4vjqq8/episode.flightcast.com/i7yh7fb8ogwkqcad4g9e5ghc.mp3

The boys remember the time they egged their boss Grumpy Dave’s house with a listener, and Andy drove away in the getaway car without him. They try to dissect why their early prank calls were so bad. Plus, the boys look back at when they created an acapella version of Bohemian Rhapsody, followed by Britney Spears’ classic song, Piece of Me. Hamish & Andy's Remembering Project. Season 3, Episode 9.

## Transcript

[0:02] A listener production.
[0:06] Wilhelm, this is our remembering project.
[0:08] Yep, where a random day of the year is selected and we look up the run sheets from all our shows from across the years to find any we did on that day.
[0:17] Over 20 years, that's about 2,500 shows and roughly 26,000 talk breaks.
[0:22] Today, we pick one.
[0:24] One talk break only and try to remember what happened based on what was written down on the run sheet from that day.
[0:29] As always, we've got podcast Mike with us here for any technical stuff.
[0:32] Hello.
[0:32] Mike, what date was randomly chosen today?
[0:35] It's the 8th of October.
[0:37] Okay then, it's Hamish go.
[0:39] Let's kick this off and find out what years Hamish will take us back to and see if we remember anything from those years.
[0:47] This is Hamish and Andy's Remembering Project.
[0:53] Hando, come with me.
[0:56] As we stroll down memory lane, there are some puddles in memory lane and some of them have
[1:03] turds in them.
[1:04] You want to avoid those puddles?
[1:07] Some have turds in them.
[1:09] I won't make us drink from a turdy puddle.
[1:12] Thank you.
[1:12] Because I'm sure we'll find a nice coffee shop or something down here in memory lane.
[1:17] And, you know, we're not dying of thirst anyway.
[1:19] You don't have to drink from a puddle with a dog shit.
[1:21] No, exactly.
[1:22] But I'm glad we're not dying of thirst because there certainly are many of those scattered down the lane.
[1:28] Yeah.
[1:28] 2005 on October 8th,
[1:33] Again, really early days.
[1:34] Really early days.
[1:35] 2005.
[1:36] 2005.
[1:37] You know, we're at the stage, you know, we're 23, 24, just got a radio show and you're still kind of going through like, especially coming into commercial radio.
[1:47] You're going from like, all right, here's the stuff we think is funny, which is just weird stuff with our friends.
[1:52] But now we're on this radio station that's given away trips to see –
[1:57] like J-Lo movies in Paris.
[2:00] And there's a lot of like Hollywood stuff that you have to suddenly pretend to care about because you've been told that's what people like hearing about.
[2:08] They like hearing about celebrities.
[2:09] And so we're like, okay.
[2:11] You know, you just remember that feeling of being like, previously we didn't care about celebrities.
[2:15] Like you and I, when we were at uni together, weren't catching up and gossiping about celebs.
[2:20] That's not what we cared about.
[2:21] And the funny thing is, it's like they thought we were young and they were worried that we were two guys on a predominantly female station.
[2:29] This plays into this.
[2:30] And so we're sitting there the entire time.
[2:31] They're like, okay, you need to think of older content.
[2:33] You guys have to really care more about Sex and the City.
[2:36] Yeah.
[2:36] And then these are the shows.
[2:38] And they give us lists.
[2:40] They go, gyms, stuff about gyms works really well, you know.
[2:45] Yep, yep.
[2:45] I might join a Fernwood gym.
[2:47] Neither of us went to a gym.
[2:49] No, but it was also because this was pre-social media too.
[2:52] Now you can just like, I think you get a fair idea of what's going on instantly.
[2:56] Yes.
[2:56] But back then it was like TV shows, movies.
[2:59] That's what people are talking about.
[3:01] Anyway, I only mention that because, like, I'm sure that's what led us to do this thing in 2005, which I'm not going to play for us because I'll save us the – the few here I'm just going to save us the embarrassment.
[3:12] It says Jennifer Aniston house purchase prank.
[3:18] And I remember what this is.
[3:19] Oh, you know, how much can you ring up and make an offer on Jennifer Aniston's house?
[3:23] It would have just been some, like, nothing piece of the paper.
[3:25] Like, oh, Jennifer Aniston's selling her house in the Hollywood Hills.
[3:28] Yep.
[3:29] And we would have, like, found out what the house is or it would have had it listed.
[3:33] And it would have been us calling.
[3:35] Yep.
[3:36] An American.
[3:37] An American.
[3:37] It's a wild thing to call overseas.
[3:39] And then going, I'll give you, you know, I'll give you $100,000 for it.
[3:43] And them going, oh, that's too low.
[3:44] And us going, hang up.
[3:47] It would have been… Oh, I don't remember it at all.
[3:49] It would have been terrible.
[3:50] Yeah.
[3:50] It would have been terrible.
[3:50] I don't want to listen to it because it would have been terrible.
[3:52] And there's just no way… If the point of a prank is to get them, there's no way we got them.
[3:58] No.
[3:58] There's no way two guys from Australia got them.
[4:02] No.
[4:02] Got them good.
[4:03] There's no way Jennifer is sitting in the other room going, really, a billion dollars?
[4:08] Are they going to pay a billion dollars?
[4:09] Like, turns out it was a radio stunt.
[4:11] Yeah.
[4:12] Oh.
[4:12] I've been gone.
[4:14] I've got to get my defenses up.
[4:16] So great, great content in 2005.
[4:19] 2007, we were on the Caravan of Courage.
[4:22] We were at Talum Bend.
[4:24] Oh, yeah.
[4:25] So where's that?
[4:28] Great question.
[4:29] Because I thought I knew what it was, but I had it confused with Murray Bridge.
[4:33] Oh, yeah.
[4:34] Tail and Bend.
[4:36] Actually, I think it's in New South Wales.
[4:38] I reckon it's central coast of New South Wales.
[4:41] South Australia.
[4:42] Damn.
[4:43] Sorry.
[4:44] I'm thinking of Buller Dealer.
[4:46] Yeah.
[4:47] Which is another place we've talked to.
[4:48] Tail and Bend.
[4:49] So Caravan and Carriage, we would have been driving… So it wasn't in Murray Bridge.
[4:51] We would have been driving from Perth to… Yeah, to Brizzy.
[4:54] To Brizzy.
[4:54] Across the bottom, then up the East and straightforward.
[4:56] Yeah, right.
[4:56] Right.
[4:58] We always sung a song at the end of the show about the town we were in.
[5:03] Yes.
[5:03] Tail and bend.
[5:04] What would the funny pun used for tail and bend?
[5:12] I mean, it's got to be something to do with end.
[5:15] The song for tail and bend, Ando, was the tune of If You Want to Be My Lover, Got to Get With My Friend.
[5:20] Oh, Wannabe by Spice Girls.
[5:22] So it would have been, you know, we're on the Caravan of Courage and we're at Tail and Bend, which is a good get.
[5:29] I actually rate that.
[5:30] It was just you and me and a guitar.
[5:31] So that's a tough ask in itself, I think.
[5:35] Always a tougher ask for you because my memories to that would be like, you know, we're sort of scribbling down a few lyrics, but you are having to learn the chords.
[5:42] Yeah.
[5:43] to a song that you have no interest in playing on the time, like 10 minutes.
[5:48] And also, we've got a crowd.
[5:50] Yeah, we had like hundreds of caravaners traveling with us or like a good bunch of cars.
[5:55] And so you'd come out and it'd be disappointing, like because other things in radio, you go, okay, let's just go pre-record this.
[6:01] We stuff up, you know.
[6:02] Marshy will fix it.
[6:03] Yeah, we can sweeten that in post.
[6:04] Yeah, so just sitting there and watching people go, what have you got for us today, funny guys?
[6:10] It's an interesting one, isn't it?
[6:11] Because we'd come out of the caravan, because it was often like frantic rehearsals inside the caravan.
[6:16] You'd walk out of the van.
[6:17] Yeah.
[6:18] Two competing things were at play.
[6:20] Number one, you walk out of a caravan with a guitar.
[6:22] You're signaling to people, get ready for the show.
[6:24] Yeah.
[6:27] It's just a bad thing to signal for us because we're like, we don't have much but we are acting as if a show is about to begin and everyone's like, great, well, we've got chairs, we're facing the music, we're excited for the show.
[6:39] So we'd have this like sinking feeling in our stomach going,
[6:43] these eight stanzas that we've written around the caravan table now must entertain a crowd.
[6:49] Yes.
[6:50] That's a huge ask for those lyrics.
[6:52] That was always a big ask for those lyrics.
[6:53] And as the caravan trip went on and we got more tired, the songs easily got worse.
[6:58] They dropped off.
[6:59] But then there's also that thing of like going, but we have a guitar.
[7:02] Yeah.
[7:03] And you can't argue with... You can't argue...
[7:08] That it's making music.
[7:09] So we've given you something.
[7:11] We've given you something.
[7:13] So you can't say you turned up to the restaurant, we didn't feed you.
[7:15] It might just be bread and butter, but we gave you something.
[7:19] So you're like, thank God we have a guitar.
[7:23] Thank God we have a guitar that is legally entertainment.
[7:28] Like, it's legally accepted as entertainment.
[7:31] Even if the words aren't good, we gave you some music.
[7:36] So there's that.
[7:37] But then there's also the flip side of that, which is there's nothing to do out there.
[7:41] So anyone doing anything is great.
[7:44] And that was what we fell into the trap with the songs is because…
[7:48] They often were in the smallest town in the middle of nowhere.
[7:51] People were so appreciative that something was happening.
[7:53] But also to write a song about the town.
[7:56] There's nothing going on.
[7:57] There's not a lot you can write about.
[7:58] We would often write about just like its geographical location.
[8:01] Half the song was about how.
[8:03] how to find it.
[8:04] And what dead animal we may have seen on the side of the road on its way into that town.
[8:07] You really needed anything.
[8:08] Anyway, that was Tail and Ben 2007.
[8:11] Look, there's a few other things that happened on this day.
[8:14] Fast forwarding, 2014, we egged Grumpy Dave's house.
[8:17] Oh, that was so much fun.
[8:18] That was really fun.
[8:19] That was a whole show we dedicated to egging his house.
[8:22] I'm not sure if I do that anymore.
[8:24] Yeah.
[8:25] I would love to egg his house again.
[8:27] No, but…
[8:28] Things feel, I don't know why, but things feel more serious these days to like, okay, we're going to go throw eggs.
[8:34] Yeah.
[8:36] I mean, we don't, Dave would be more, he's also been heavily promoted, Dave.
[8:41] Like he's about 10 positions higher now in the company.
[8:43] Now we're egging, now we're not just egging the guy in the office next door's house.
[8:47] We're like, yeah, it would, and also, you know, we,
[8:52] I mean, we don't talk about Grumpy Dave as much on the show.
[8:55] No.
[8:55] So if you went to go… 20, you know, 10 years on, you'd be like, Hey, we should end.
[8:59] What are you guys doing here?
[9:00] We should go.
[9:01] Didn't know you were in town.
[9:04] We could have had dinner.
[9:05] Again!
[9:06] From my recollection, we allowed a listener to go in Ergie's.
[9:10] Yeah, it was Nathan, I think his name was.
[9:12] And we dressed as gang members.
[9:14] Yes, that's right.
[9:15] And we were… You and I were both… I say gang members.
[9:17] I mean, like, you know, as if you're in a musical.
[9:20] Yeah, 21 Jubs type thing.
[9:23] We went to his house.
[9:24] Nathan was doing the egging or did we all do the egging?
[9:27] I think we all did and I definitely remember throwing an egg.
[9:29] Okay, maybe you… No, maybe Nathan just threw the egg.
[9:32] Maybe I remember holding an egg.
[9:33] And then we were in the getaway car.
[9:35] You had the getaway car.
[9:36] I was in the getaway car but something happened and we left.
[9:38] I left Nathan, I think.
[9:40] I think you drove off without getting Nathan.
[9:42] I think you left both of us.
[9:44] Jez, do you remember that?
[9:45] Yeah.
[9:46] Yeah.
[9:46] You drove off.
[9:47] I remember running with Nathan.
[9:51] Our extraction vehicle took off without us.
[9:54] And we all met up around the corner.
[9:56] Yeah.
[9:57] And we were all, like, amped as if Dave's security guards were chasing us.
[10:02] But really, it was just a small, it was just like a nice Victorian house in Camberwell in Victoria.
[10:07] Yeah.
[10:08] Like it's a nice cottage.
[10:11] And I didn't even know if they were home at the time.
[10:12] I must admit, doing the radio show and podcast over these years,
[10:17] Getting to simulate a percentage of what the adrenaline might be for real life, some of these real life scenarios, has been one of my favourite things.
[10:25] Super fun.
[10:26] Where you do get all the adrenaline.
[10:30] Or even just like it qualifies as a legitimate use of your day.
[10:34] Yeah.
[10:34] If you're doing it for the radio show, then you've got time to do it.
[10:36] Like if we had actual jobs for like, oh, look, we're working at the factory today, so we can't go and egg our boss's house.
[10:43] Like we have work to do.
[10:45] With someone who's just called the factory.
[10:48] What's your name?
[10:49] Nathan.
[10:49] Hey, mate.
[10:50] Hey, yeah, we don't have that particular type of lumber in stock, but would you be interested in egging our boss' house?
[10:56] That was the most fun, wasn't it?
[10:57] Okay.
[10:58] I want to focus on 2008 because this is something that I don't remember doing.
[11:02] Well, I do remember.
[11:02] You see what I mean?
[11:04] We did…
[11:05] We did a segment called Hamish Andy Arm Music.
[11:07] Yeah.
[11:07] Where just using our mouths, we had to recreate Bohemian Rhapsody.
[11:10] Yes.
[11:11] And it was really fun.
[11:13] So we were laying down like 20 tracks together.
[11:16] So we'd play the actual music by Queen, we'd stop it to a point and then we had to like use our mouths to do the drums, the guitars, piano, everything.
[11:24] Anything you heard in there and the vocals, yes.
[11:27] And from memory, we stopped it at a point where it was like,
[11:31] It was after the guitar solo.
[11:32] Yeah, so it was ding, ding, ding, ding.
[11:34] It was I See a Little Silhouette of a Man from that bit.
[11:36] Yeah.
[11:38] Because then you're like, And so, you know, you're trying to like build up and then into that guitar solo.
[11:45] We loved doing it.
[11:46] They sounded way better than we thought they were going to sound.
[11:49] Because we had like a week to build them.
[11:51] And every day we were like laid down on a music track.
[11:53] And I did mine at home with my brother.
[11:55] And he was so – and we'd spent so long on it.
[11:59] We're through the night one night.
[12:00] We got to about 3 a.m., right?
[12:04] And I was desperate to make it sound great.
[12:07] And Haim, you were doing yours much quicker than me.
[12:09] I was doing mine in like 20 minutes.
[12:11] You did.
[12:11] No, I wasn't 20 minutes.
[12:12] But you did with yours with Dean every day.
[12:14] Yeah, yeah.
[12:15] I just do it after the show.
[12:16] And it was so late when I had to do the guitar solo and I just couldn't hit the high notes at all.
[12:21] And my brother was so –
[12:27] And I think you won.
[12:28] I did.
[12:28] With a far better guitar song than I put down.
[12:31] And my brother still was like a… I remember us, you and I having an argument over the noise a piano makes.
[12:36] Mine was better.
[12:37] It wasn't.
[12:38] Yours was too music tinctury.
[12:41] No, we don't.
[12:42] Yours was like fling, fling, fling.
[12:44] No, mine was tongue, tongue.
[12:45] Tongue, tongue, tongue.
[12:47] It was just very music teacher-y but I was kind of like, back then even I could feel music and I was just kind of letting it rip.
[12:53] Anyway, after the success of that, and this often happened on the show, our producer Sammy was like, got to do another one.
[12:59] Yeah.
[13:00] Got to do another one.
[13:01] Do you remember the next one we did?
[13:02] I think it was Britney Spears.
[13:04] It's You Want a Piece of Me.
[13:06] Yeah.
[13:06] It was You Want a Piece of Me.
[13:07] And it wasn't great.
[13:08] It wasn't great.
[13:09] It wasn't.
[13:09] We knew it wasn't great.
[13:10] It was like…
[13:12] How do you beat Bohemian Rhapsody?
[13:13] It's the greatest piece of music.
[13:14] It's like famous to being the most layered piece of music ever recorded.
[13:19] And you are actually picking out actual instruments rather than electronic sounds and trying to replicate it.
[13:26] So it's an easier thing to try and take in.
[13:28] Well, unfortunately, this is… Oh, no.
[13:33] The lesser of the two.
[13:34] This is the lesser of the two that we have from today.
[13:36] Do you want to hit up our sponsor for a second then?
[13:39] Much to their chagrin, we're going to hear.
[13:41] I think this might have been a bit where we're just working on it.
[13:44] Yeah, right.
[13:44] Okay.
[13:45] It's not even finished.
[13:47] All right, Ando.
[13:49] Well, I was more rested for the second one after the guitar solo debacle, but I don't think it helped us because I don't think this song was easy.
[13:57] The two greatest songs ever recorded by human beings.
[14:02] We'd already done Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen.
[14:04] Now it was time for You Want a Piece of Me by Britney Spears.
[14:09] The 8th of October, 2008.
[14:10] Hamish and Andy, driving you home in Hamman.
[14:15] McDonald's have found Australia's top ten most loved songs because they love music, McDonald's.
[14:20] Yeah, but more than that.
[14:22] We just don't love music.
[14:23] Hamish and Andy are music.
[14:25] Are music.
[14:26] Yes, this is a segment that we've done in the past.
[14:28] We tackled Bohemian Rhapsody Ham.
[14:30] That was difficult.
[14:32] Well, not really for you.
[14:32] You were victorious.
[14:33] I was.
[14:34] You were the champ.
[14:34] I became the champ, and I've been the champ ever since.
[14:37] 100% victories to Hamish, the champ, and sadly no victories or 0% for Andy the Dunce.
[14:45] It is hard wearing the Dunce hat.
[14:47] I've been wearing that pointy witch's Dunce hat for a long time.
[14:50] It's also heavy with the feeling of defeat.
[14:52] No, no.
[14:53] And embarrassment.
[14:53] Excitement.
[14:54] Heavy with excitement?
[14:57] But, Hayme, the song we've chosen, you as a champ chose this one, Piece of Me by Britney Spears.
[15:02] Have a listen, everybody.
[15:13] There you go.
[15:14] Tough one.
[15:14] That's Britney singing the start of her song.
[15:16] Now, the full performance is tomorrow.
[15:18] Yeah, but so we're just going to play that much for you today.
[15:21] We haven't done the actual Britney lyrics yet.
[15:23] We wanted to get an indicator of who is... Like the worm.
[15:29] It's just like an election.
[15:30] It's like a political... During election debate, just kind of gauge who's winning at this stage.
[15:33] Who's come out of the Greyhound boxes the fastest?
[15:35] Who's leading heading into the first corner?
[15:37] Anne called in 131060.
[15:39] Anne, how are you?
[15:40] I'm well, thanks.
[15:41] How are you?
[15:41] Good.
[15:41] Now, you're happy... Have you got a good, clear phone line there?
[15:44] I do.
[15:45] I do.
[15:45] You're happy to have a listen to both The Champ and The Dunces' attempt so far to see who may have the edge leading in?
[15:51] I'm ready and waiting.
[15:52] Bring it on.
[15:53] And we're going to go with The Dunces first.
[15:55] This is my start so far to Pieces of Me by Britney Spears, creating the whole thing with just sounds from my mouth layering it on top of each other.
[16:04] Good luck.
[16:04] Have a listen.
[16:05] Have a listen.
[16:16] What do you think, Anne?
[16:17] What do you think, Anne?
[16:17] Were you turned on by my Britney voice at the end?
[16:20] I wouldn't say turned on.
[16:22] Yeah.
[16:23] I'm impressed.
[16:24] I think I can hear a neighbourhood dog howling in the background.
[16:27] Yeah, I can't get him down.
[16:27] I do think it sounded a bit like a farmyard with the chicken and the groaning dog, but yes.
[16:32] Yes, I think it's quite good.
[16:34] Well, Anne, I'll have you on good authority that Brittany actually used a chicken and a groaning dog.
[16:38] So, yeah.
[16:40] Special delivery to the studio.
[16:41] Extra points from me.
[16:42] This is Hamish's attempt so far at Piece of Me by Brittany Spears.
[16:48] Oh, yeah.
[16:58] No, sorry, Ben, play my one, not Brittany's one.
[17:01] Oh, hang on a sec, that was my one.
[17:03] Brittany didn't sound like she was choking.
[17:04] Oh, my God, the champ.
[17:06] I mean, don't let me sway you, Anne, but hasn't the champ come out to a real flyer?
[17:12] I'm really sorry, Andy, but...
[17:14] Hamish, he's got it.
[17:16] So far, he's got it.
[17:17] No, he's got it in inverted commas.
[17:19] No one knows how to put it into words.
[17:21] He's just got it, okay?
[17:22] He's got the music in his soul and it's coming out.
[17:26] Oh, I'll let it out, Anne, I say, because it's a burden having it in here.
[17:29] I've got some work.
[17:30] I've got the dunce has got some work ahead of him tonight then.
[17:34] Certainly do.
[17:35] That's disappointing.
[17:36] I'm sorry.
[17:37] But that's all right.
[17:38] Is it a close race or is he well out in front?
[17:41] He's in front, but I think you could come over the top of him if you try hard.
[17:46] Appreciate that.
[17:46] Thanks, Anne.
[17:47] And look, to anyone that runs a humble pie delivery company, I'd like one of your largest pies for Andy delivered about this time tomorrow.
[17:56] Thanks very much.
[17:57] Hold on to that delivery, because the name might be changed on that delivery box.
[18:04] Look, I feel it's better than I remember.
[18:06] Way better than I thought.
[18:07] I remember it being a stinker.
[18:09] Yeah.
[18:09] And I'm not saying that's amazing.
[18:11] You had a scholarship to sing.
[18:12] Half.
[18:13] Half scholarship to singing at school.
[18:15] The maximum possible.
[18:16] Again, sure.
[18:17] But the half of what's available.
[18:21] What did you make of them?
[18:23] Yeah, they were awesome.
[18:24] I would have easily been able to tell what the song was if we didn't say.
[18:28] Yeah, yeah.
[18:28] But yours was better, Hamish.
[18:29] No offence, Andy, but I think you try too hard with them to make them, like, sound really pro.
[18:36] You can see by Andy's face, this is still an open wound.
[18:39] Hamish is doing, like, really organic sounds.
[18:42] 14 years later, it's still an open wound.
[18:46] To your credit, it's because of his lack of physical experience.
[18:50] You're more experienced than him.
[18:52] And it gets in the way, doesn't he?
[18:53] Overthink it.
[18:55] You can read all the books you won on ice hockey, but get me on the ice and I'll find the goals.
[19:00] I only take feedback from full scholarship.
[19:05] Full scholarship singing people.
[19:06] Well done, Mike.
[19:07] Really astute.
[19:07] You should have been on a full academic for that sort of insight.
[19:12] Great remembering.

Shows are listed from Apple Podcasts' charts and directory, and Podcast Index where it is used. Every show and episode belongs to its publisher and plays from the publisher's own feed; this site hosts none of them.