# The Bacon 100

An episode of [Hamish & Andy Plus +](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1616749262), 29 Nov 2020, 18 min.

Audio: https://enrichment.soundstack.com/4vjqq8/episode.flightcast.com/unbx1rury23kslxu4xgc211n.mp3

Hamish & Andy remember back to when Hamish’s dad Noel challenged Justin Bieber to a table tennis match. They discuss a theory that Wippa told them about the rules of disclosing blackbelt karate skills. And listen back to what is possibly the longest tribute song of all time…the Bacon 100. Hamish & Andy's Remembering Project. Season 1, Episode 15.

## Transcript

[0:02] A listener production.
[0:06] Wilhelm, this is our remembering project.
[0:08] Yep, where a random day of the year is selected and we look up the run sheets from all our shows from across the years to find any we did on that day.
[0:17] Over 20 years, that's about 2,500 shows and roughly 26,000 talk breaks.
[0:22] Today, we pick one.
[0:24] One talk break only and try to remember what happened based on what was written down on the run sheet from that day.
[0:29] As always, we've got podcast Mike with us here for any technical stuff.
[0:32] Hello, podcast.
[0:32] Mike, what date was randomly chosen today?
[0:35] It's the 28th of September.
[0:37] Okay, that's Andy's go then.
[0:38] Let's kick it off and find out what years Andy will take us back to and we'll see if we remember anything from those years.
[0:46] This is Hamish and Andy's Remembering Project.
[0:53] Aim some fun stuff here.
[0:55] What do we got?
[0:55] There's one that stood out completely.
[0:58] It's too long.
[0:59] I don't want to go into it.
[1:00] It'll come up again this day.
[1:01] Okay.
[1:01] And then we'll go the deep dive.
[1:03] But your dad versus Justin Bieber.
[1:06] Sure.
[1:06] Table tennis.
[1:07] In table tennis.
[1:07] That day.
[1:08] Jason Bieber.
[1:10] Justin Bubler, he called it.
[1:14] But the behind the scenes of that day and the behavior of one of Jay Bieber.
[1:19] Yeah.
[1:20] I didn't want to go into it today, but we'll get to it.
[1:23] That's a show by itself.
[1:25] Yeah, 2015 that was.
[1:27] Yeah, five years ago.
[1:29] Five years ago.
[1:29] And Boobieb has come a long way since then.
[1:32] It seems like he's had a bit of a… I think he's mellowed out a bit.
[1:35] Yeah.
[1:35] Which is nice.
[1:36] Dad hasn't.
[1:38] Dad's the same.
[1:40] Dad's pretty similar, to be honest.
[1:42] I loved what was written in 2007 on the run sheet.
[1:46] Again, it's not the bit I want to play, but…
[1:50] Do you remember this question coming up?
[1:51] Because I can't remember the answer.
[1:53] I remember us talking about it, but I can't remember the answer.
[1:57] Do you have to warn someone that you're a black belt?
[2:00] Yes.
[2:01] Remember we...
[2:01] I remember.
[2:02] You had brought that to the show, hadn't you?
[2:04] I know the answer because a mate of ours, Whipper, had been telling me that the guy, he'd met a guy who... And at this stage, Whipper wasn't on radio, I don't think.
[2:18] No, 2007.
[2:19] Does the, you know, Fitzy and Whipper now, know the Brekkie show, did, you know, Ryan, Whipper and Monty on Drive.
[2:24] So it was...
[2:26] You know, generally if Whipper's saying something to me these days, you can't take it.
[2:29] It's for his radio content.
[2:31] But back in those days I could take it because he didn't need it for his own radio show.
[2:34] And I remember him telling me that he'd met a guy that was a black belt.
[2:38] Maybe he was even training Whipper in martial arts who was such an idiot.
[2:43] Good luck.
[2:45] Meeting Whipper in the park and Whipper was watching him do some air kicks.
[2:49] And this guy was so advanced at such a high level of black belt that he told Whipper, and this is what we thought was slight bullshit, he had told Whipper, I'm so advanced that I have to warn someone three times.
[3:04] before getting into a fight with them that I am a black belt because I'm a lethal weapon.
[3:09] So he was like, if someone's like, you know, come on, mate, what are you doing?
[3:13] He's pushing outside.
[3:13] He's going to go, I'm a black belt, black belt, black belt.
[3:17] He has to go, I'm a black belt.
[3:19] Say again, I'm a black belt.
[3:20] I'm telling you for a third and final time, I'm a black belt.
[3:23] Then the next thing, the guy's picking up his teeth with a broken hand.
[3:26] Was it true?
[3:26] I can't remember.
[3:27] I mean, I'm not...
[3:29] I think we had a guy, probably someone ring up about the same level of like intensity to go, yeah, that's me as well and I have to warn people in the black belt.
[3:37] Yeah.
[3:37] So we probably left that going.
[3:40] I don't know if it's true, but black belts think it's true.
[3:43] Okay.
[3:44] We're not going there.
[3:46] In 2010, we just returned from India.
[3:50] Oh, great fun.
[3:51] Gee, we did a lot in 2010, I remember.
[3:53] Because we did Caravan of Courage in 2010 in the UK and Ireland.
[3:56] Yep.
[3:57] Did the show, did the TV show, came home, did a load of washing and then I think we just nicked off to India.
[4:03] Yeah.
[4:03] And we didn't do the radio show while we were in India.
[4:06] No, we just – We did it in our radio break, went across, filmed Learn India, which was fun.
[4:10] But that's not where I want to go –
[4:12] I want to take us to New Zealand because that's where we were in 2012, Ham.
[4:18] Yes.
[4:19] We were doing the show from a sports radio station.
[4:26] I don't know where.
[4:26] I vaguely remember this.
[4:29] Yeah, because I think… Did it have something written on the vending machine?
[4:33] Do you remember that show?
[4:35] That's right.
[4:36] Yeah, what was… There was a vending machine issue.
[4:39] Yeah, I remember this as well.
[4:41] We were in some random radio station, possibly in the North Island of New Zealand.
[4:46] So the way it would work is we were actually filming a TV show travelling all of New Zealand.
[4:51] Yeah.
[4:52] And every Friday we still had to do a live radio show.
[4:54] We were just doing Fridays then.
[4:55] And you'd ask different radio stations… Basically like being billeted when you were on like a sports trip.
[5:02] Yeah, and so there was a sports radio station that had the equipment and allowed us to come and broadcast live back to Australia.
[5:08] You need a thing called an ISDN line, which is a radio line that theoretically connects to studios, yet never in the history of radio has one successfully connected studio to studio on the first go.
[5:20] Yeah, on time.
[5:23] So we're going across New Zealand, right?
[5:26] And during the drive, long drives, Yeah.
[5:29] There was a pastime that we came up with that we ended up writing to put on that particular show in New Zealand.
[5:38] Is this the song?
[5:39] Yeah.
[5:40] This is…
[5:42] What was this?
[5:43] Because I remember it was epic because we didn't start the fire.
[5:47] Oh, it was the Kevin Bacon game.
[5:48] We were trying to do the reverse of the Kevin Bacon game.
[5:50] You're spot on.
[5:51] Which was we're trying to do six degrees of separation is fine.
[5:55] But could you do 100 degrees of separation?
[5:57] Could you get from one actor to Kevin Bacon in 100 steps?
[6:02] Yes.
[6:02] Rather than six steps.
[6:04] Because that was the interesting thing with Kevin Bacon.
[6:06] You know, everyone used to play the Kevin Bacon game where you had to, I think the game was you listed one actor, isn't it?
[6:12] Yeah, anyone.
[6:12] You could connect anyone to Kevin Bacon in six steps.
[6:14] And you had to try and work through films, you know, that people had jointly used to get back to Kevin Bacon.
[6:20] We interviewed Kevin Bacon, remember back in the day?
[6:23] No.
[6:23] well back, like 2004 maybe.
[6:25] Yeah.
[6:26] We were sent to Cannes when we were just doing Saturday mornings to do radio interviews for Peter Hellyer and Judith Lucy who were on the Drive show.
[6:35] And we went, this will be funny.
[6:37] Let's ask Kevin Bacon about the Kevin Bacon game.
[6:39] I wonder if he's heard about it.
[6:41] He's heard about it.
[6:41] He's heard about it.
[6:44] Oh, too many times you got that feeling.
[6:48] I have never seen someone's eyes roll back into the side of their head and then come out the bottom of their eyelids.
[6:54] That's how far it went back around.
[6:55] Did a full 360.
[6:58] I can't remember.
[6:59] I think we might have left it.
[7:00] I think Offi's reaction, I think we just kind of went…
[7:04] Yeah, I think we did a Don't Worry About It.
[7:06] Which is rare, but I think we didn't even want to double down that.
[7:10] And he was wearing slippers.
[7:11] Remember that?
[7:12] I think we talked about the slippers a lot because we'd sort of anticipated that out of the ten minutes we had to talk to him, half of it would be the Kevin Bacon game, and we'd pulled the ripcord on it two seconds in.
[7:22] He was for a film called Where the Truth Lies.
[7:24] Pretty good film.
[7:25] It was a pretty good film with Colin Firth.
[7:26] But hey, I'm...
[7:28] The Kevin Bacon game, we talked about it.
[7:30] Obviously linking people with six degrees separation.
[7:32] We decided we'd try and embark on the Kevin 100.
[7:36] Yeah, the Kevin 100.
[7:39] The Bacon 100 song.
[7:40] The Bacon 100, that's what it was.
[7:42] The Bacon 100 song.
[7:43] That's all that was written on the run sheet.
[7:45] Oh, I'm so glad you found this, Andy.
[7:47] We'll take a quick break and then we'll come back with the Bacon 100.
[7:50] All I remember is just...
[7:52] afternoons sitting in the caravan adding more and more and more to this song.
[7:57] Like it took ages to write.
[7:58] Yeah.
[7:58] I think it took like two or three afternoons to write, which is for us.
[8:01] Yeah, a lot of effort.
[8:02] That's a decade.
[8:03] Yeah.
[8:05] Okay.
[8:06] Well, Mike, you know how long the clip is.
[8:07] I mean, how long does the break say?
[8:09] I've got eight minutes, 50.
[8:11] Well, we wouldn't have mucked around getting into it, I don't reckon, because if it's that long.
[8:15] Jeez, let's, without further ado, our attempt to link Kevin Bacon.
[8:19] I can't remember who we started with.
[8:20] I guess we're about to hear it.
[8:22] And I think we used Billy Joel's song.
[8:24] Yeah, it was We Didn't Set the Fire.
[8:25] Okay.
[8:26] Oh, I remember trying to match it.
[8:29] Okay, good luck.
[8:32] The 28th of September, 2012.
[8:36] Hands off Friday.
[8:37] Hamish Shanty driving you home.
[8:39] Ham.
[8:40] It brings us to the end, but we're not going to catch up over jazz today.
[8:45] because we've got something else that's far more important.
[8:47] Far bigger, Andy.
[8:48] Our attempt to link Kevin Bacon... Before you do that, we should just say, Hamishnandy.com, there's photos of vampires in interspecial battles.
[8:57] The podcast is there as well.
[8:59] Something amazing is about to happen.
[9:00] But this will feature in the podcast, because I want to wrap everything up.
[9:03] Yeah, if you can just text your friends now or tweet them or whatever just to go, yo, turn it on.
[9:08] History's about to be made.
[9:09] Hamish and Andy, put their heads together.
[9:11] A little help from their old friend, the internet.
[9:14] and Jack, and have managed to link Selma Hayek to Kevin Bacon in just 100 steps through the movies they've worked on.
[9:22] For people that don't know the Kevin Bacon game, it kind of goes, you know, oh, Val Kilmer, how could you link him to Kevin Bacon?
[9:29] Okay, Val Kilmer in Top Gun with Tom Cruise, Tom Cruise, few good men, Kevin Bacon, boom.
[9:35] That's a Bacon score of two.
[9:37] We wanted to see if we could create a bacon number of 100.
[9:40] Yeah.
[9:41] It's never been attempted before and maybe for good reason.
[9:44] We're playing with a magic we don't understand.
[9:46] Bearing in mind, we've also played with vampires on this show.
[9:49] Yeah.
[9:49] So you'd think that's coming from a show that's not afraid to have a bit of a fight.
[9:53] Yeah.
[9:53] I got very angry at a chocolate bar called a perky nana.
[9:57] I said it wasn't available in Australia.
[9:58] Turns out you can get it at IGA.
[9:59] LAUGHTER
[10:01] So already on today's show, we've proved that maybe we aren't grown up enough to have fights.
[10:07] We're not grown up enough to take on things that are dangerous.
[10:09] That hasn't stopped us, Ando.
[10:11] No.
[10:11] It hasn't stopped us from wanting to link Salma Hayek to Kevin Bacon and create a Bacon number of 100.
[10:20] The rule is, obviously, is not going there in the most efficient way possible.
[10:24] We need to take the scenic route, obviously, because I'm sure Selma Hayek has a real Bacon number.
[10:29] Probably one or two.
[10:31] Perhaps she's been directly in a film with Kevin Baggis.
[10:33] Might have kissed him.
[10:34] I don't know.
[10:36] That's not what this is about today.
[10:38] This is about going through 100 films and eventually getting to Bacon.
[10:42] So if you're on the freeway, everyone pull over.
[10:45] Oh, you don't have to.
[10:46] You don't have to.
[10:47] I mean, it's going to go for a while.
[10:49] It's five and a half minutes.
[10:50] Can we brace?
[10:50] We have to brace you because we're going to go through 100 films and 100 actors.
[10:54] 100 films, 100 actors in five and a half minutes.
[10:57] I can't believe we got it down to five and a half minutes.
[10:59] Originally, when we conceived of this song, we thought it would be about a 25-minute song and we would only just play the highlights on the show.
[11:05] We'd have to release the full song on the podcast.
[11:08] But no, I think the world deserves to hear the full song.
[11:12] Without any further ado, we give you a bacon number in song of 100.
[11:21] All right, let's start with Selma Hayek.
[11:24] She was in Dogma, Ben Affleck.
[11:27] Aaron Eckhart in Paycheck.
[11:28] He was in Possession with Gwyneth Paltrow.
[11:32] Shallow Hell, Jack Black.
[11:33] Nicholson in Mars Attacks.
[11:35] He was in The Departed with DiCaprio.
[11:38] Gilbert Great with Johnny Depp Finding Neverland, Kate Winslet Romance and Cigarettes with John Turretto Transformers, Megan Fox Friends with Kids, Adam Scott He was in Our Idiot Brother with Rashida Jones Muppets with Amy Adams He's in Catch Me If You Can So is Christopher Walken He's also in Round the Band Michael Caine, Dark Knight Christian Bale, Harsh Times J.K. Simmons, Megamind Tina Fey, Date Night Let's take that banking number higher
[12:08] Even higher than a very high wire.
[12:11] But your numbers don't get higher.
[12:14] We want a century.
[12:17] Andy and me.
[12:18] Steve Carell, get smart.
[12:20] Terry Crews, longest yard.
[12:21] Adam Salacone heads.
[12:23] David Spade, senseless.
[12:25] Marlon Wayne's little man.
[12:26] Also Tracy Morgan.
[12:28] Cop out with Bruce Willis.
[12:30] Number 26.
[12:31] Pulp Fiction.
[12:32] Uma Thurman.
[12:33] Kill Bill.
[12:34] Michael Madsen in Reservoir Dogs.
[12:36] He cuts that guy's ear off.
[12:38] That guy's name is Kurt Boltz.
[12:40] He's in Dancers with Wolves.
[12:41] Kevin Costner.
[12:42] Swing vote.
[12:43] Kelsey Grammer down Periscope.
[12:45] Rob Schneider.
[12:45] Grown ups.
[12:46] Kevin James Mall Cop.
[12:48] Let's keep on going.
[12:49] Let's never, never, never stop.
[12:51] From Mall Cop.
[12:52] Gemma Hayes.
[12:53] She's in Smurfs.
[12:54] And plays alongside Hank.
[12:56] Hank Azaria.
[12:58] Godzilla, great flick, also starred Broderick.
[13:01] Lots of roles but nothing cooler than the great Ferris Bueller.
[13:04] That we get, Charlie Sheen, even though he's barely seen.
[13:08] He was in Hot Shots from Vegas, who we've got.
[13:11] It brings us to John Cryer.
[13:14] He was in the Force Superman with Gene Hackman.
[13:17] The bigger number's getting higher.
[13:20] We're going for a hunder and nothing under.
[13:24] Ten and Bums with Ben Stiller alongside Alan Alda in the movie Tower Heist, which is not worth seeing twice.
[13:31] Alda could go any direction.
[13:33] I'll take the object of my affection.
[13:34] Nice movie.
[13:35] It's a bit of fun.
[13:36] Has Jennifer Aniston.
[13:37] In Bounty Hunter takes us to Jason Sudeikis.
[13:41] The campaign of 2012 has Will Ferrell.
[13:44] We're getting tired, but also inspired.
[13:45] The bacon number to which we aspire.
[14:00] Here's a C in Roman numerals, cause we are not fools.
[14:04] Sarah Marshall, Jonah Hill.
[14:06] Jump, Street, Ice Cube did thrill.
[14:07] Texas, two boys in the hood.
[14:09] Cuba Gooding, so good.
[14:11] Pearl Harbor can't beckon sale.
[14:12] Your total recall was a fail, but Colin Farrell was okay.
[14:15] That's what gives us LL called J.
[14:18] Any given Sunday throws up the great Dennis Quaid Who's in footless for the new 1-2-S So far from bacon Andy McDowell in Groundhog Day All rise for Bill Murray Zombieland Harrison Waddle De Niro's on Let's get that bacon number higher
[14:34] We are over 55, I've never felt so alive.
[14:37] We're not going down as liars.
[14:40] Let that bacon number soar, come on, give me more.
[14:44] Nero's in New York, New York, but that didn't have Ethan Hawke.
[14:47] Great expectations had him right.
[14:49] Winona in reality bites.
[14:50] Natalie Portman in Black Swan.
[14:52] The Gorham's Wonder Emporium.
[14:54] Had Dustin Hoffman and Nat.
[14:55] Kung Fu Band of Dusty's back Jackie Chan in Shanghai Noon The Life Aquatic with Steve Sisu Licks Owen Wilson and Blanchett Brings us to the Hobbits Elijah Wood, Happy Feet Robin Williams, Hamlet Now we're nearing 74 Bring on Richard Attenborough Jurassic Park for Sam Neill With Zarendon, Irresistible Dead Man Walkin' Introducing Sean Penn Mystic River Fish Burned The Matrix Had, Marcus Chong Who was in the Crowbird Not the one that we all knowed
[15:24] Tara Reid was also there, American Pie with blonde hair.
[15:27] Eugene Levy's hair was bad, he played Jim's dad.
[15:30] Let's get that bacon number higher.
[15:33] We are going the long way, cos there ain't no wrong way.
[15:37] This bacon number's going higher.
[15:40] Everybody stand back This B number has a jet pack A mighty win with Christopher Guest Spinal tap was his best Harry Shearer, The Truman Show Jim Carrey a while ago Did the mass with Diaz Fear and loathing Las Vegas Had Gary Busey Point Brex and Massey Keanu kissed a Bullock Underneath the speeding bus Bullock kissed Benjamin Bratt Missed congeniality for that Traffic has Del Toro Gangster films, he's the go The usual suspects Kevin Spacey, the
[16:09] We'll be right back.
[16:33] It would say, did you ever feel today You see a bacon number higher than 84 I mean, are you on the floor?
[16:43] Shrek had John Cleese James Bond with Pierce Brosnan, Mamma Mia Streep wearing Prada We're inside the final ten I can smell bacon Death becomes a Willis again Hayley Joel Osmond
[16:57] Easy young Forrest Gump.
[16:58] Tom Hanks and Easy Jump.
[17:00] Larry Crown, not the best, along with Julia Roberts.
[17:03] Who's been in a film with her?
[17:05] Flat liners keep.
[17:06] Sutherland, if you're good, man, there's your friggin' bacon!
[17:10] Yes!
[17:12] That's 100 bacon!
[17:14] It's a bacon score of 100!
[17:16] Bacon Centurion.
[17:18] It's raining bacon!
[17:19] Bacon leaps.
[17:23] Not only did that contain a bacon number of 100, but it contained a dubious lyric count of 5,000.
[17:30] I know we're under the pump.
[17:32] We should have redone a couple of those ones.
[17:35] There's definitely some take twos in there that need to be done.
[17:39] I don't even think I pronounced Wag the Dog anything like that.
[17:43] I mean, some of the lyrics, though, just going, everybody stand back, this B number has a jet pack.
[17:51] Jesus, guys.
[17:52] Maybe save it for next week if you're not finished the song.
[17:57] We know you've been driving around doing a TV show.
[18:00] But if you're not finished, there's no pressure.
[18:02] You don't have to.
[18:03] You can do something.
[18:04] You don't have to pay it.
[18:05] It's not like the Kevin Bacon game's odd topic.
[18:07] It'll still be as irrelevant next week if you want to play it then.
[18:11] Anyway, good times.
[18:12] Great remembering.

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