# NLE Choppa & Syd on: Baptisms, Being Too High, Mental Health & The Internet

An episode of [The Shop](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1612191065), 22 Sep 2026, 1 h 08 min.

Audio: https://podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/traffic.omny.fm/d/clips/e73c998e-6e60-432f-8610-ae210140c5b1/23feb9e4-1b09-4aaf-aac7-b47100f9c253/03ac1fc1-5586-482b-b2ff-b4cd0179d237/audio.mp3?utm_source=Podcast&in_playlist=2da86b1a-e970-4fa1-ae32-b47100f9c261

This week, it’s a family affair at #TheShop. Steelo Brim and Travis Bennett are joined by Syd—Travis’s sister, the acclaimed artist and co-founder of The Internet—for their first-ever sit-down conversation together. They run back what their life on tour was like during their days with Odd Future. NLE Choppa also pulls up to reflect on the spiritual awakening that led him to be baptized again. They unpack how dramatically technology has changed in a single generation— the wild reality of being a celebrity in the internet era. And they get deep on how mental health affects every part of life, and the unsettling feeling of realizing you might be a little too high. 0:00 - Intro 00:50 - SYD and Choppa's Early Music Careers 04:20 - Why NLE and SYD Stopped Being Vegan 07:05 - The Difference Between Generations and Social Media 20:50 - Remembering Childhood Bullies 22:32 - It's Not Normal to Be Famous 25:53 - Working With Family 32:00 - Handling the Power of Cannabis 36:18 - NLE Choppa on Getting Re-Baptized 41:32 - The Balance Between Ego and Pride 43:53 - It's Hard to Hide From Family 47:07 - Young Taco and SYD 48:50 - Hoop Dreams 52:23 - Why Steelo Doesn't Like the Bulls 54:28 - Does It Feel Different Releasing Music Now vs. the Beginning? 59:08 - Learning to Accept Yourself See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

## Transcript

[0:00] Speaker 1: I remember my first bully. I was in kindergarten.
[0:03] Speaker 2: Call him out, girl.
[0:05] Speaker 3: Call him out.
[0:06] Speaker 4: The ego is a necessary tool. It's the thing that
[0:09] Speaker 4: reminds us of our work.
[0:10] Speaker 2: Sound like I got to inflate the ego.
[0:12] Speaker 3: Hey, she pointed at you twice.
[0:13] Speaker 4: No, no.
[0:14] Speaker 3: Some people do.
[0:15] Speaker 4: We're not talking about him.
[0:16] Speaker 1: The feeling was so overwhelming, I thought I was going
[0:19] Speaker 1: to die.
[0:20] Speaker 5: I literally had to, like, create the space for myself
[0:23] Speaker 5: and tell myself that it was okay to cry. I
[0:25] Speaker 5: just heard all the times where when I cried, I
[0:28] Speaker 5: heard like.
[0:29] Speaker 6: Stop crying, stop crying.
[0:31] Speaker 3: Am I a millennial?
[0:32] Speaker 4: You're on the cusp. You're 94 and 95 starts Gen Z.
[0:35] Speaker 2: Being the cusp of.
[0:36] Speaker 7: That I think is important because I was raised in
[0:38] Speaker 7: what feels like two years.
[0:40] Speaker 2: Being the cusp is important because of me.
[0:43] Speaker 3: I got the most important job around here.
[0:45] Speaker 2: What was the first music you put on the internet?
[0:52] Speaker 3: Flashlight?
[0:53] Speaker 4: The first song?
[0:54] Speaker 3: Yeah.
[0:55] Speaker 4: Of mine?
[0:55] Speaker 1: Yeah.
[0:58] Speaker 2: No, it was one after that.
[0:58] Speaker 4: Yeah, it was probably Flashlight.
[0:59] Speaker 2: But it was one after that, before internet stuff came out.
[1:03] Speaker 3: No.
[1:04] Speaker 2: Was Love 1, 2, what was that one?
[1:06] Speaker 4: That's an internet song. That's on the first internet album, brother.
[1:09] Speaker 3: Do you feel like y'all name of the band helped
[1:11] Speaker 3: or hurt as far as... People aren't like.
[1:15] Speaker 4: Oh, it hurt at first.
[1:16] Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[1:18] Speaker 3: It was hard to find. Even for me, I was
[1:19] Speaker 3: a fan, but I was like, yeah, it's hard to
[1:21] Speaker 3: find the internet. I'm on the internet.
[1:23] Speaker 4: Our mom was like, you're going to have to change
[1:25] Speaker 4: the name of your band. I can't find it online.
[1:28] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[1:29] Speaker 4: And eventually, like one day I Googled it and it
[1:33] Speaker 4: was me and my homies.
[1:36] Speaker 3: You're like, you're wrong.
[1:37] Speaker 6: I was like, okay, we did it.
[1:38] Speaker 3: This worked.
[1:39] Speaker 1: We did it.
[1:39] Speaker 2: How'd you pick your name?
[1:41] Speaker 1: My mom.
[1:43] Speaker 5: I was with a group at first. Choppa always came
[1:46] Speaker 5: to me, but I made my own group called NLE.
[1:50] Speaker 5: I had to leave in a group of people, and
[1:55] Speaker 5: then came that.
[1:55] Speaker 1: Rob Markman Is.
[1:56] Speaker 3: The group still going on? Do you still have NLE?
[1:58] Speaker 3: I know there were members that came and went, but
[2:00] Speaker 3: is it still the group?
[2:02] Speaker 4: Or no?
[2:02] Speaker 3: Or are you just the only NLE left? He's like,
[2:06] Speaker 3: I'm the one, baby.
[2:07] Speaker 4: It can be like that. We know what that's like, too.
[2:14] Speaker 7: Yeah, being in a big group, I think, is interesting,
[2:17] Speaker 7: especially coming up. Like, looking back, you don't think about it.
[2:20] Speaker 7: Or I say looking back, I think about it more.
[2:22] Speaker 7: And at the time, I didn't even think about it.
[2:24] Speaker 7: It was just I was hanging out with the homies.
[2:26] Speaker 7: We were doing things.
[2:27] Speaker 1: There's no thought behind that.
[2:28] Speaker 2: You're just operating.
[2:30] Speaker 7: And then at a certain point where you could be, like,
[2:31] Speaker 7: reflective and look at it in retrospect, you're like, Oh,
[2:35] Speaker 7: what the fuck?
[2:35] Speaker 2: That was a lot we did in such a short
[2:37] Speaker 2: amount of time.
[2:38] Speaker 7: But also, I guess I look at it and like,
[2:45] Speaker 7: I'm not upset at myself or like angry with myself.
[2:48] Speaker 7: I'm disappointed in myself at times because I'm just like, damn,
[2:51] Speaker 7: there was so much going on and I was so
[2:52] Speaker 7: close-minded to things. Like, we would travel the world, bro,
[2:55] Speaker 7: and I'd be like, I just want to find McDonald's
[2:57] Speaker 7: and TGI Fridays.
[2:58] Speaker 2: I don't even want to go try anything new. They're like,
[3:00] Speaker 2: you want to go to this museum?
[3:01] Speaker 3: I'm like, museum?
[3:03] Speaker 6: What the fuck?
[3:04] Speaker 2: Like, no, I want to be in the hotel. I
[3:06] Speaker 2: want to go here. I want to go there. That
[3:07] Speaker 2: would really be it.
[3:09] Speaker 4: I'm still that way sometimes. Sometimes I land, I'm tired.
[3:14] Speaker 4: Sometimes I just don't have the energy. And you were
[3:16] Speaker 4: also DJing and stuff. Sometimes the anxiety of what you're
[3:20] Speaker 4: there for can ruin what would be a moment or
[3:24] Speaker 4: would be like a tourist kind of vibe. That's why
[3:28] Speaker 4: I used to tell people all the time, touring is
[3:30] Speaker 4: one thing and And vacationing is one thing, you know?
[3:34] Speaker 4: And traveling is exhausting.
[3:36] Speaker 3: Do you have time to like really take in that stuff?
[3:38] Speaker 3: Like when you travel and tour, do you, when you
[3:40] Speaker 3: get somewhere new, do you try to make sure you
[3:41] Speaker 3: get outside and take in something new?
[3:43] Speaker 1: Hell yeah.
[3:43] Speaker 3: Yeah, you see me like a young, smart dude that
[3:45] Speaker 3: like tries to do stuff like that?
[3:47] Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I try to do the best I can. Me,
[3:50] Speaker 1: I'm like simple.
[3:50] Speaker 5: So like if I find me a part to where
[3:54] Speaker 5: I can just put my feet in.
[3:55] Speaker 1: The grass, I'd be straight. Like if I could just
[3:58] Speaker 1: get some nature, I'm cool.
[4:01] Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't need to go to a museum, honestly.
[4:03] Speaker 4: I like to, yeah.
[4:04] Speaker 6: Y'all don't like seeing the stolen art?
[4:05] Speaker 3: Y'all don't want to walk in and see what the
[4:08] Speaker 3: white people took from y'all?
[4:10] Speaker 4: Honestly, yo, honestly, renaissance museums are dope, though. But, yeah,
[4:14] Speaker 4: a good park.
[4:15] Speaker 3: Food.
[4:15] Speaker 1: And food, like food.
[4:16] Speaker 4: And good food, yeah.
[4:17] Speaker 1: Finding, like, new places to eat at. I like going TikTok. No,
[4:21] Speaker 1: not no more.
[4:21] Speaker 3: But you were vegan at one point.
[4:23] Speaker 1: I was vegan, like, three years ago.
[4:24] Speaker 4: I was vegan for, like, a... A year or so.
[4:27] Speaker 3: What made y'all go, like, I gotta ask, what made
[4:29] Speaker 3: y'all be like, all right, I'm done with this? Was
[4:32] Speaker 3: it a meal you saw or something you just missed?
[4:33] Speaker 3: And you was like, damn, man.
[4:35] Speaker 1: It was Jamaica.
[4:36] Speaker 3: It was Jamaica?
[4:37] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[4:37] Speaker 3: Yeah, it's real hard to be vegan in Jamaica.
[4:39] Speaker 4: Yes and no. There's a lot of, like, believe it
[4:41] Speaker 4: or not, there's a lot of vegan options in Jamaica
[4:43] Speaker 4: because Rastafarians, a lot of them are vegan, but... There's
[4:47] Speaker 4: also a lot of good meats in Jamaican food. Yeah,
[4:52] Speaker 4: pause and pause, yeah.
[4:54] Speaker 3: Both kinds. Both kinds.
[4:57] Speaker 4: But nah, I don't know. I quit eating meat because
[5:04] Speaker 4: I was on tour once. I was in Indonesia and
[5:10] Speaker 4: we were driving to this festival on the top, in
[5:13] Speaker 4: the middle of this mountain in the forest or whatever.
[5:17] Speaker 4: it was like a two hour drive around this mountain
[5:20] Speaker 4: and it's real rural Indonesia. So like we're driving and
[5:24] Speaker 4: on the side of the road, it's like, you know,
[5:27] Speaker 4: food carts with like chickens, like hanging from the neck,
[5:30] Speaker 4: like in the cart, skinny ass chickens. And I'm like,
[5:38] Speaker 4: And I had already had some chicken while I was
[5:40] Speaker 4: there that just didn't taste good.
[5:42] Speaker 3: It probably tasted like chicken. We're not eating chicken here.
[5:45] Speaker 4: It was, you know, it was that, no, it was
[5:47] Speaker 4: slightly like, I was like, ah.
[5:49] Speaker 2: Gamey?
[5:51] Speaker 4: Yeah, or like, it might have been like slightly undercooked
[5:54] Speaker 4: to where I was like, to where I was like,
[5:57] Speaker 4: I'm not eating chicken while I'm here. I just can't
[5:59] Speaker 4: do it. And so I left. I was like, I'm
[6:01] Speaker 4: just not going to eat chicken while I'm here. And
[6:02] Speaker 4: then from there we went to Australia. Australia has a
[6:05] Speaker 4: lot of vegan options too.
[6:06] Speaker 3: Have you been?
[6:07] Speaker 1: Yes.
[6:08] Speaker 4: Yeah. They have a lot of vegan options. Huh?
[6:10] Speaker 1: Which parts you went to?
[6:12] Speaker 4: I was doing Laneway Festival, where you go to every, like.
[6:15] Speaker 1: Big city. Like Melbourne, Brisbane.
[6:17] Speaker 4: Melbourne, Perth, Brisbane, Sydney.
[6:19] Speaker 5: I went to somewhere else close to Australia, Carlisle.
[6:22] Speaker 1: I think it's Carlisle. Queenstown.
[6:25] Speaker 2: Ooh.
[6:26] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[6:26] Speaker 1: Beautiful, bro.
[6:29] Speaker 6: Yeah.
[6:29] Speaker 4: I love Australia.
[6:30] Speaker 2: What's your favorite place to travel now?
[6:31] Speaker 7: That you've seen a majority, I would assume, a majority
[6:35] Speaker 7: of the world touring and shit.
[6:37] Speaker 2: I'm gonna ask you the same thing.
[6:40] Speaker 1: It's a lot with Jamaica for me, for real.
[6:42] Speaker 4: Oh, where?
[6:42] Speaker 1: Yeah.
[6:44] Speaker 4: Have you done a show there?
[6:45] Speaker 1: Oh, no.
[6:46] Speaker 4: Me neither.
[6:46] Speaker 2: I don't know anybody who has not done a show.
[6:48] Speaker 4: I don't know.
[6:48] Speaker 3: Y'all need to throw a show. All Jamaicans get together,
[6:51] Speaker 3: put a show on, you know? Hey.
[6:53] Speaker 7: You know?
[6:54] Speaker 4: Bumba Fest.
[6:57] Speaker 3: Boba Fett is crazy, dude.
[6:58] Speaker 4: Yo, that would be cool, though.
[7:03] Speaker 2: And you're 23?
[7:05] Speaker 3: Are you 23, bro? So he is so much, bro.
[7:07] Speaker 3: I know, that's what I'm saying.
[7:09] Speaker 7: Like, do you know what MySpace is? I mean, you
[7:11] Speaker 7: know what MySpace is, but like, you weren't around for MySpace.
[7:13] Speaker 3: No, bro.
[7:14] Speaker 1: I didn't use MySpace. It was on, like, Kik.
[7:18] Speaker 4: See, I've never used Kik. I see it all the time.
[7:24] Speaker 4: I watch YouTube a lot. I see a lot of clips,
[7:29] Speaker 4: but yeah, I've never used Kik. I'm old, though. I'm
[7:32] Speaker 4: like 35. I'm damn near 40.
[7:35] Speaker 3: What social media site do you feel like you've benefited
[7:38] Speaker 3: most through music from?
[7:39] Speaker 1: Instagram.
[7:39] Speaker 3: Instagram, for sure. Over YouTube? Well, YouTube is.
[7:44] Speaker 1: It's a fine line.
[7:46] Speaker 3: TikTok as well?
[7:47] Speaker 5: TikTok that boy, I ain't gonna lie. TikTok that thang.
[7:52] Speaker 3: And you launched from MySpace? Like, your music was you
[7:54] Speaker 3: first on MySpace?
[7:55] Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah.
[7:56] Speaker 3: They say it's coming back.
[7:59] Speaker 2: No, it ain't.
[7:59] Speaker 6: MySpace?
[8:00] Speaker 3: They say MySpace is actually coming back.
[8:02] Speaker 4: Who said it? Justin Timberlake?
[8:03] Speaker 3: It's real shit. This is in the news. I think
[8:05] Speaker 3: MySpace is relaunching. They're going to try to relaunch. Social
[8:08] Speaker 3: media place to go. I don't know if it's Tom.
[8:10] Speaker 3: I don't know if it's the same dude. His picture
[8:12] Speaker 3: used to be wild as hell. You look back at it,
[8:15] Speaker 3: it was a weird ass picture, wasn't it?
[8:16] Speaker 6: It can't be Tom.
[8:17] Speaker 3: I don't know if it's Tom.
[8:18] Speaker 5: I don't know.
[8:19] Speaker 4: Personally, I just feel like when it comes to stuff
[8:21] Speaker 4: like that, you can't go backwards. You have to move.
[8:23] Speaker 4: You can only go forward. Like, niggas ain't going back
[8:26] Speaker 4: on my space. You need a new social media. I
[8:28] Speaker 4: feel like niggas want a new social media, which I get. Like,
[8:31] Speaker 4: we're tired of Instagram and TikTok, right? Or not tired
[8:33] Speaker 4: of it, but like, that's all we got?
[8:35] Speaker 1: We're tired.
[8:36] Speaker 7: It's just, it's become like a business more so. Like,
[8:38] Speaker 7: it's an algorithmic business. It is based on keeping us
[8:41] Speaker 7: consumed and in the time and doing all this shit
[8:44] Speaker 7: while not enjoying the actual world that we live in. So, like,
[8:46] Speaker 7: hearing this motherfucker at 23 years old, excuse me for
[8:48] Speaker 7: calling you a motherfucker, you.
[8:49] Speaker 1: Know what I mean?
[8:50] Speaker 7: This man, 23 years old, talking about, I want to
[8:53] Speaker 7: go outside, find a parking touch, crash, I think is
[8:55] Speaker 7: an important thing. And it's the necessary change that is
[8:59] Speaker 7: quietly occurring. Like, I watched a video the other night,
[9:02] Speaker 7: and this girl was making fun of her sister who
[9:04] Speaker 7: was an influencer.
[9:05] Speaker 2: And she was like, we're going to eat lettuce. Like
[9:08] Speaker 2: doing all this stupid shit.
[9:09] Speaker 7: And it was like, wow, I wonder if kids will
[9:11] Speaker 7: be like that with us, how we were with our parents.
[9:13] Speaker 7: You know, everything that they did to us was like,
[9:15] Speaker 7: once my mom got on.
[9:16] Speaker 3: Facebook, I was out. Yeah, for sure. That's always a
[9:19] Speaker 3: breaking point.
[9:20] Speaker 4: I think generations are reactions to the one that raised them.
[9:25] Speaker 3: Yeah.
[9:25] Speaker 4: Not the one necessarily above them, but the one that
[9:27] Speaker 4: raised them. Millennials, I think, are raising... Millennials are raising
[9:31] Speaker 4: Gen X.
[9:33] Speaker 1: Alpha or something?
[9:34] Speaker 4: No, they're raising Gen X. Gen Alpha are the kids
[9:38] Speaker 4: right now. They're the youngest ones. They seem to really
[9:42] Speaker 4: not really mess with the super technology stuff.
[9:46] Speaker 3: Which ones?
[9:46] Speaker 4: Gen Alpha.
[9:48] Speaker 2: I will say probably iPads.
[9:49] Speaker 1: What age group is Gen Alpha?
[9:51] Speaker 4: I think they're in middle school now, probably.
[9:57] Speaker 1: Makes sense.
[9:58] Speaker 3: And you're not messing with technology?
[10:00] Speaker 4: They're not all this AI stuff. They're not really interested
[10:04] Speaker 4: in it.
[10:04] Speaker 2: What are the years of generations?
[10:07] Speaker 4: My manager has kids that age.
[10:09] Speaker 2: Is generations like a five-year thing? Is it a 10-year thing?
[10:12] Speaker 7: If we're like speaking about it, like Gen Alpha.
[10:14] Speaker 4: I had to Google it.
[10:15] Speaker 3: I'm not going to lie.
[10:15] Speaker 4: I had to Google it.
[10:17] Speaker 3: 19 years or 20 years, right?
[10:19] Speaker 2: 20 years is the generation? No, because then me and you.
[10:22] Speaker 1: I think it's going by the tens. I think it's
[10:24] Speaker 1: by the tens.
[10:25] Speaker 2: Is it by the tens? So the 90s would be
[10:27] Speaker 2: one generation.
[10:28] Speaker 3: It covers. I thought it covers. Oh, it's 15.
[10:33] Speaker 2: It's 15. 15 years is a generation? Yeah.
[10:35] Speaker 4: That makes sense, I guess. I pulled up a little chart.
[10:39] Speaker 4: It says... Gen Alpha is 2010 and up. Gen Z
[10:45] Speaker 4: is 95 and up. Millennials, okay, so yeah, Millennials, we're
[10:51] Speaker 4: raising Gen Z. So yeah, Millennials is 80 and up.
[10:55] Speaker 4: We're Millennials, yeah.
[10:56] Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you didn't realize?
[10:57] Speaker 4: Well, you're on the last year.
[10:59] Speaker 3: You're on the cusp.
[10:59] Speaker 4: You're 94, and 95 starts Gen Z.
[11:00] Speaker 7: Being the cusp of that, I think, is important because
[11:03] Speaker 7: I was raised in what feels like two years.
[11:06] Speaker 3: Being the cusp is important because of me. I got
[11:10] Speaker 3: the most important job around here. I got to bring
[11:12] Speaker 3: these niggas together.
[11:15] Speaker 4: Hey.
[11:15] Speaker 6: You're like, all right, bro, all right.
[11:18] Speaker 3: Hey.
[11:18] Speaker 2: No, I grew up in two generations, I feel like.
[11:20] Speaker 2: And then you got parents. Like, my parents are.
[11:22] Speaker 4: Boomers.
[11:23] Speaker 2: Yeah, they're older than the majority of the rest of
[11:25] Speaker 2: my homies' parents.
[11:25] Speaker 7: Yeah.
[11:26] Speaker 1: That's what you said, two generations.
[11:28] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[11:28] Speaker 2: How old is your mom and parents?
[11:32] Speaker 1: About 50. About 50.
[11:34] Speaker 3: It's two generations, always. It's like two generations, yeah.
[11:38] Speaker 4: Yeah, I guess.
[11:39] Speaker 3: For the most part.
[11:40] Speaker 2: My mom, I'm trying to think, my mom was, I
[11:42] Speaker 2: don't know.
[11:43] Speaker 4: They're boomers.
[11:44] Speaker 3: She was born.
[11:44] Speaker 4: I got to look at the back.
[11:45] Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying?
[11:46] Speaker 3: Yeah, I think we all, I think millennials are the
[11:48] Speaker 3: best because, I will say this much, because we did
[11:51] Speaker 3: get both technology and no technology. Yeah. You know what
[11:53] Speaker 3: I'm saying? So it allows us to understand both sides
[11:56] Speaker 3: of it in a way. Like, I don't know if
[11:57] Speaker 3: we are in love or introduced the same way as,
[12:00] Speaker 3: you know, the younger generation to technology, but it allows
[12:04] Speaker 3: us to like, you know, have, I think, a healthier
[12:06] Speaker 3: balance there.
[12:07] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[12:08] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[12:08] Speaker 1: It's for sure escalated so much from y'all's time, for sure. Yeah.
[12:12] Speaker 5: Because I'm thinking like, in the same token, it's like,
[12:15] Speaker 5: I ain't going to lie, it was things during that
[12:17] Speaker 5: time where people were excited to see or excited to
[12:21] Speaker 5: have their hands on too. But it's undeniable, like the
[12:25] Speaker 5: leaps that technology is taking to get people more and
[12:29] Speaker 5: more hooked.
[12:30] Speaker 3: Yeah.
[12:31] Speaker 4: It's slot machine technology and those algorithms, they say.
[12:34] Speaker 5: Yeah.
[12:35] Speaker 2: The swipe up is a slot machine.
[12:37] Speaker 4: It's a slot machine.
[12:37] Speaker 2: It's like in hopes that the next thing will be
[12:39] Speaker 2: something that you care about.
[12:40] Speaker 6: Yeah.
[12:40] Speaker 2: In hopes of the next thing. And I think, yeah,
[12:43] Speaker 2: grand scheme of things, we're fucked, low key.
[12:47] Speaker 3: Like, it's fried. No.
[12:49] Speaker 7: And it's on the kids now to be the difference
[12:51] Speaker 7: between us. Like, I hope that they skew more analog
[12:54] Speaker 7: and focus more on being, like, present in situations. And
[12:57] Speaker 7: I think a lot of us now at our age
[12:59] Speaker 7: talk about how present we want to be.
[13:01] Speaker 2: But that's what we talk about on the Internet. So
[13:03] Speaker 2: it don't really make no fucking sense.
[13:04] Speaker 4: I mean, shoot. Good luck finding the new post. I
[13:09] Speaker 4: have such a hard time.
[13:11] Speaker 1: I think what's dope, though, about what you're saying is
[13:13] Speaker 1: like how... I want to look into that. You was
[13:16] Speaker 1: like Gen X.
[13:18] Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah.
[13:19] Speaker 1: They're not really into the technology.
[13:21] Speaker 4: Gen Alpha, yeah. The kids.
[13:22] Speaker 1: Yeah, Gen Alpha.
[13:23] Speaker 4: Yeah, they... Like, my manager has... kids in middle school
[13:29] Speaker 4: and high school. And he was like, they think that's lame.
[13:32] Speaker 4: They think all this AI, these AI deep fakes, they
[13:35] Speaker 4: think it's so lame.
[13:36] Speaker 6: I don't know.
[13:38] Speaker 3: I feel like, you know.
[13:39] Speaker 2: You have a nine year old.
[13:40] Speaker 3: You have a nine year old, yeah. And he goes
[13:42] Speaker 3: to school. I feel like it's easier again to not
[13:44] Speaker 3: give kids screen time when you have money. It's easier
[13:48] Speaker 3: to have the idea of saying, oh, kids are not
[13:50] Speaker 3: into that because we have two nannies. Very easy for
[13:53] Speaker 3: me to say, hey, you got to go play basketball with.
[13:55] Speaker 4: This thing or read. No, to your point, my manager
[13:56] Speaker 4: don't have a TV in his house.
[13:58] Speaker 3: Oh, see, you know.
[13:59] Speaker 6: Never have.
[13:59] Speaker 3: Yeah, so it's going to be easy to say no
[14:00] Speaker 3: screen time.
[14:01] Speaker 2: When you got no screens.
[14:04] Speaker 4: Damn, no TV.
[14:04] Speaker 7: And also, yeah, we grew up on TV. Like, TV
[14:08] Speaker 7: was a huge part of my life.
[14:09] Speaker 4: I love TV.
[14:09] Speaker 3: I think it's a balance. I think you, you know, again.
[14:12] Speaker 6: You don't want your kids to be weird.
[14:14] Speaker 3: Socially weird, because they can't connect to certain things. I'm
[14:16] Speaker 3: not saying that, like, it's bad. I think those kids
[14:18] Speaker 3: probably be smarter. There'll be all these different things. But
[14:20] Speaker 3: then you'd be like, from a social standpoint, you lose
[14:23] Speaker 3: out on so many things that technology does bring you.
[14:26] Speaker 3: and connectivity.
[14:27] Speaker 1: Balance is the word for sure. Balance, facts.
[14:30] Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I think there's a thing going on where,
[14:35] Speaker 4: you know, certain people are trying to kind of like
[14:41] Speaker 4: censor social media for kids right now.
[14:45] Speaker 2: 15 and under.
[14:46] Speaker 4: Yeah, there's like 16 or something. There's like a whole,
[14:49] Speaker 4: they're trying to pass some laws.
[14:50] Speaker 3: China and France have already passed it.
[14:52] Speaker 4: Right, and they're trying to do it here. But one
[14:57] Speaker 4: of the pushbacks that I heard about as a perspective
[14:59] Speaker 4: of somebody I watch on YouTube was like, what about
[15:03] Speaker 4: the kids who live in rural areas who maybe don't
[15:08] Speaker 4: fit in anywhere where they live, except for something they
[15:12] Speaker 4: saw online that lets them know they're not alone. And
[15:15] Speaker 4: that's where I'm like, aw.
[15:17] Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that is important.
[15:20] Speaker 7: Especially, yeah, if you're not like, there is some kids
[15:23] Speaker 7: who I grew up around or I know through video
[15:25] Speaker 7: games that I didn't.
[15:26] Speaker 2: They're like, my homie Austin. Austin's not like the most.
[15:31] Speaker 7: Outward person, he's like be chilling at the crib. But
[15:34] Speaker 7: when we play video games, it's like we connected playing
[15:36] Speaker 7: video games, bro. I never met him in my life
[15:37] Speaker 7: before we played video games. I invited him to the movies.
[15:40] Speaker 3: And then y'all met up?
[15:41] Speaker 6: Are you one of them kids?
[15:43] Speaker 3: I love that for you, bro. I'd be sitting on
[15:45] Speaker 3: the internet. It'd be like a whole bunch of kids.
[15:47] Speaker 3: I'd be like, I'm the first guy I've met in him.
[15:49] Speaker 6: We've been friends for 15 years. That's crazy.
[15:52] Speaker 7: We met during COVID playing video games with two other people.
[15:56] Speaker 7: I didn't know he lived in LA. Like I didn't
[15:57] Speaker 7: know any of these people. I was just playing video games,
[15:59] Speaker 7: met these people, whatever. They lived in Minnesota and he
[16:02] Speaker 7: lived in LA. And one day I was talking about
[16:04] Speaker 7: something and he was on the game and I was like,
[16:06] Speaker 7: why are you on bro?
[16:07] Speaker 2: It's like late for you.
[16:07] Speaker 7: He was like, it's 12 o'clock.
[16:10] Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, it's 12 o'clock.
[16:11] Speaker 6: Where you live at?
[16:12] Speaker 2: He was like, I live in Northridge. I was like, oh,
[16:14] Speaker 2: what the fuck?
[16:15] Speaker 3: Nigga.
[16:17] Speaker 4: That's so dumb.
[16:18] Speaker 3: That's crazy.
[16:19] Speaker 1: I always get a little bit afraid of that also.
[16:22] Speaker 3: Yeah, of course. You think you talk to an I.O.
[16:24] Speaker 3: and then... Oh, I'm 32.
[16:27] Speaker 1: Yeah.
[16:28] Speaker 2: No, they.
[16:29] Speaker 4: Yeah, I think it was Roblox or something that was
[16:31] Speaker 4: getting in trouble for that.
[16:33] Speaker 2: Yeah, Roblox was a little weird.
[16:35] Speaker 5: That's funny you say that, though, because, like, I think
[16:37] Speaker 5: we're supposed to be my generation's Gen Z.
[16:40] Speaker 1: It's like when we used to Play the game, same
[16:42] Speaker 1: type thing.
[16:43] Speaker 5: And on social media, we'll be able to see, like,
[16:47] Speaker 5: it was more so paying to our location.
[16:49] Speaker 1: So, like, we was on Instagram.
[16:52] Speaker 5: We'll see, like, you know, plus if you following people
[16:54] Speaker 5: from Memphis, you'll see the broad aspect of, like, Memphis.
[16:58] Speaker 1: So, like, you know, you can meet.
[17:00] Speaker 5: Like, I was meeting with different artists and stuff from
[17:03] Speaker 5: different hoods and different stuff.
[17:05] Speaker 1: But we would have.
[17:05] Speaker 5: Never truly crossed paths proudly on an everyday basis if
[17:09] Speaker 5: I didn't have social media.
[17:11] Speaker 3: And our parents told us social media and video games
[17:13] Speaker 3: were going to give us shit.
[17:14] Speaker 2: And they made hell of a video game.
[17:17] Speaker 4: Yeah, rich as hell.
[17:18] Speaker 1: It gave us perspective, too.
[17:19] Speaker 4: Yes, that's the biggest thing, I think.
[17:22] Speaker 1: Because I ain't going to lie, man. I'm a firm believer.
[17:26] Speaker 5: When you just see things on the internet, it's a
[17:31] Speaker 5: whole nother world. behind that, you know what I'm saying?
[17:34] Speaker 5: And I feel like a lot of fans are blessed
[17:37] Speaker 5: to see probably like one or two, three, five percent.
[17:41] Speaker 5: But they never, you know, social media never give you
[17:45] Speaker 5: what's truly going on behind the scenes of a person
[17:48] Speaker 5: physically or even what's on their mind spiritually on a
[17:52] Speaker 5: day-to-day basis. So I think the word balance is so
[17:56] Speaker 5: beautiful because if kids are learning, like, hey, this is.
[18:00] Speaker 1: A world, but it ain't the world.
[18:02] Speaker 5: I think that's when it's like more shifting and more
[18:06] Speaker 5: things could be compatible with where we're trying to lead.
[18:10] Speaker 4: That's the key. Because it's easy, especially as a kid,
[18:14] Speaker 4: I feel like it's easy to get lost in, oh,
[18:19] Speaker 4: so-and-so said this about, commented this to me, and da-da-da-da-da,
[18:23] Speaker 4: people talking about me, and da-da-da-da. And, you know, for us,
[18:26] Speaker 4: we kind of came up on the internet at a
[18:29] Speaker 4: time where that was almost new. Like Twitter was brand
[18:34] Speaker 4: new when we got on. And we had to like
[18:38] Speaker 4: learn how to handle that. Like how to handle people
[18:42] Speaker 4: talking about you.
[18:42] Speaker 2: Yeah, we the first generation to learn about it.
[18:44] Speaker 4: Yes, people saying whatever they want, you know. Like it's
[18:49] Speaker 4: funny actually, like I had to ask mom to stop
[18:53] Speaker 4: responding to people about me on Instagram.
[18:56] Speaker 2: It's crazy.
[18:56] Speaker 3: I caught my mama in the middle of typing one.
[19:05] Speaker 4: But they're not used to it. And I told her,
[19:08] Speaker 4: I was like, I know it's annoying. You have people
[19:10] Speaker 4: saying whatever they want about people you actually know. And
[19:13] Speaker 4: you're like, hey, that's not true. And I was like,
[19:16] Speaker 4: these people aren't here to be convinced.
[19:17] Speaker 2: No, you're yelling on a soapbox.
[19:19] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[19:20] Speaker 2: It falls on deaf ears because no one knows who
[19:21] Speaker 2: you are.
[19:22] Speaker 4: Not only that, most people aren't there to be convinced.
[19:26] Speaker 3: Yeah, at all. I'm here to break you.
[19:28] Speaker 1: I'm going to be honest. I ain't going to lie.
[19:30] Speaker 5: The last few, I think the last few days, probably
[19:35] Speaker 5: about a week in, I think it took me probably about,
[19:40] Speaker 5: it was like three, four, I'd say three, four, five
[19:43] Speaker 5: years of just being like, high-roaded. And then it got
[19:46] Speaker 5: to a point to where, like, I really started to
[19:49] Speaker 5: see certain things about, like, me or words on my
[19:52] Speaker 5: character that once I started to really see some people believe,
[19:57] Speaker 5: I think that's what has been triggering me.
[20:00] Speaker 1: Like, it's like, it's like, dang, it's like.
[20:04] Speaker 5: Like you know some things aren't true within you, so
[20:08] Speaker 5: you good with it and then you live a way.
[20:10] Speaker 1: Where it's like, I know me, I'm cool. And I
[20:13] Speaker 1: really embody, I know me, I'm cool.
[20:15] Speaker 5: But then I had to wake up one day, I said,
[20:18] Speaker 5: hold on now.
[20:19] Speaker 1: I said, it's a lot of people that.
[20:24] Speaker 5: Could take a smear campaign and be consumed by it. And, man,
[20:30] Speaker 5: I kid you not, my mom, there's one lady, like,
[20:33] Speaker 5: whenever it was something on my name, she tried to
[20:36] Speaker 5: make sure her best. She was on the front line with, like,
[20:38] Speaker 5: being vocal like now. But I think the last few
[20:42] Speaker 5: days I've been trying to speak up more for myself
[20:44] Speaker 5: because I, you know, that's bullying.
[20:47] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[20:47] Speaker 1: At the end of the day. And I think, like... Man,
[20:50] Speaker 1: I remember my first bully. I was in kindergarten.
[20:54] Speaker 2: Call him out.
[20:55] Speaker 1: Yeah, I was in kindergarten.
[20:58] Speaker 6: Call him out, boy.
[21:00] Speaker 2: Let him know.
[21:01] Speaker 4: Times have changed.
[21:02] Speaker 3: You doing good now?
[21:03] Speaker 1: What was crazy, though, was I was in kindergarten. It
[21:06] Speaker 1: was a K through 12. The kid was in high school.
[21:09] Speaker 1: That's insane. Wow.
[21:10] Speaker 3: Wow.
[21:13] Speaker 2: Yeah, building a child is a suck.
[21:15] Speaker 5: I remember, man, my pops, he came up to the
[21:19] Speaker 5: school and it was a thing.
[21:20] Speaker 1: He was like, uh.
[21:21] Speaker 3: How would y'all know each other? Why would he be
[21:24] Speaker 3: talking to you? That's insane.
[21:25] Speaker 5: Man, bro, I don't know, man, but it was placed
[21:30] Speaker 5: in my path since yay high. Like, kindergarten, I had
[21:33] Speaker 5: to learn, like, you know, how to speak up or
[21:36] Speaker 5: stand up for yourself. And I'm at the point now,
[21:38] Speaker 5: it's like, well.
[21:42] Speaker 1: If a person is giving a perception.
[21:44] Speaker 5: Of you and then you're not giving another perception, and
[21:48] Speaker 5: then within that you got the truth, then you don't
[21:53] Speaker 5: give yourself a fair shot to even be judged good.
[21:56] Speaker 6: Because it's a thing.
[21:57] Speaker 1: We want to be loved. We want to be accepted.
[22:00] Speaker 4: It's a human trait to want to.
[22:05] Speaker 4: And think about it, on an evolutionary level, if humans
[22:09] Speaker 4: weren't accepted in a community, they died. They couldn't survive.
[22:15] Speaker 4: So yeah, that's how we survive is finding ways to
[22:23] Speaker 4: accept one another more than just tolerate one another. But also, yeah,
[22:29] Speaker 4: learning how to speak up for yourself.
[22:32] Speaker 7: I saw a rapper to Hollis talking about, it's not
[22:36] Speaker 7: normal to be famous.
[22:37] Speaker 1: And I thought about that.
[22:38] Speaker 7: It's not normal to see people talk about you in
[22:40] Speaker 7: any capacity, especially the way you were able to do it.
[22:42] Speaker 7: Comment on whatever the fuck I do, whatever. It's like,
[22:44] Speaker 7: that's not normal. That's not supposed to happen. So how
[22:48] Speaker 7: do we manage, like mental health is a super strong thing.
[22:51] Speaker 7: And I think you guys both are adamant about how
[22:54] Speaker 7: important it is.
[22:56] Speaker 2: But like, how do you manage that through all this shit?
[22:58] Speaker 3: Like, you know what I mean?
[22:59] Speaker 2: It's like, I, And no one can really give you
[23:02] Speaker 2: the advice.
[23:02] Speaker 7: It's like, yeah, you can turn the other cheek, but
[23:04] Speaker 7: unless somebody's in that position, it's impossible. So is there
[23:06] Speaker 7: any advice that, like, a celebrity is giving you that's
[23:08] Speaker 7: been like, this is some bullshit?
[23:11] Speaker 4: Well, I think it's like what you said earlier, just like,
[23:15] Speaker 4: this is, you know, this is not the whole life.
[23:18] Speaker 4: This is not your whole life. You know? And for me,
[23:24] Speaker 4: being present helps and.
[23:28] Speaker 4: Focusing on what's really around me. Like, you know me,
[23:30] Speaker 4: I spend all day at home, in my backyard with
[23:32] Speaker 4: my dogs, in my garage, smoking and watching TV.
[23:37] Speaker 3: I love that, it's my life.
[23:39] Speaker 6: Yeah, no, and.
[23:40] Speaker 4: My favorite thing to do is like, nothing. My favorite
[23:43] Speaker 4: thing to do is like, not have to do nothing.
[23:47] Speaker 4: You know what I mean? I don't want nothing on
[23:49] Speaker 4: my schedule.
[23:49] Speaker 1: You're nervous this one, right, too.
[23:51] Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly. So, yeah, I think it's, you know, It's
[23:57] Speaker 4: a balance of, and I'll say this, I struggle sometimes
[24:02] Speaker 4: with social media for part of feeling vain. Because to
[24:08] Speaker 4: your point, celebrity, one, it's not normal to be this
[24:11] Speaker 4: kind of celebrities we have now, especially, where you can
[24:14] Speaker 4: literally open an app and see all the.
[24:17] Speaker 2: See everything about you. Everybody's business, where they.
[24:20] Speaker 6: Live, their bathroom.
[24:21] Speaker 3: Too much access.
[24:21] Speaker 4: It was a time where celebrities would only see that
[24:24] Speaker 4: in print. You know what I mean? And they were
[24:26] Speaker 4: able to kind of hide away from it.
[24:29] Speaker 7: I wish that wall would kind of go back up.
[24:30] Speaker 7: Not completely, but I wish that there was at least
[24:32] Speaker 7: a barrier. I feel like a lot of people are
[24:35] Speaker 7: too comfortable with people that they see on the internet
[24:37] Speaker 7: and think that that is the person they know. And
[24:39] Speaker 7: they're like, oh, bro, Chava, what's up, bro? I don't
[24:44] Speaker 7: know you at all, but they feel like they know
[24:46] Speaker 7: you because of social media. They feel like they know
[24:48] Speaker 7: you because of your music. I think music specifically is
[24:50] Speaker 7: a more in-tune personal thing with somebody because somebody can
[24:54] Speaker 7: hear a song and be like, that shit changed my
[24:56] Speaker 7: life and come up to you and give you that message.
[24:58] Speaker 7: But if you're at the airport and you retire, you're like,
[25:03] Speaker 7: I'm looking for gate 12A, dude.
[25:04] Speaker 3: Like, leave me the.
[25:05] Speaker 4: I will say this. Like, I think, you know, what
[25:09] Speaker 4: you put out comes back to you. So I'd say, like,
[25:15] Speaker 4: I've never had a fan or an experience where somebody
[25:20] Speaker 4: came up to me and was like, yo, I love you. Like, Like,
[25:24] Speaker 4: I've never had that. And I think it's because my
[25:26] Speaker 4: music doesn't give that. So I just get what I've
[25:29] Speaker 4: put out, which has been really beautiful. Like, I feel
[25:31] Speaker 4: like I have the best listeners ever. I'll be in
[25:35] Speaker 4: the line at Starbucks looking and be like, what's up?
[25:38] Speaker 4: Can I get in? And they'll be like, yo, Purple
[25:40] Speaker 4: Naked Ladies? That's my first album that most people have
[25:43] Speaker 4: never heard of. And like, I just love that. And
[25:46] Speaker 4: they don't want a picture either. They just like, yo.
[25:49] Speaker 2: A good interaction is the best. But a bad interaction
[25:51] Speaker 2: is fantastic.
[25:52] Speaker 1: Terrifying.
[25:53] Speaker 3: You worked with your mom as well, right?
[25:55] Speaker 1: She's the manager, yeah.
[25:56] Speaker 3: You guys have worked together.
[25:57] Speaker 1: My mom and my dad. My mom and my dad.
[25:59] Speaker 5: My mom, my business manager, my pops, my road manager.
[26:05] Speaker 3: What would you feel like? They work together as well.
[26:07] Speaker 3: They're siblings if you didn't know. What would you say
[26:12] Speaker 3: are the negatives and positives of working with your family?
[26:19] Speaker 1: I'd say....
[26:24] Speaker 5: The thing is that a family dynamic, the enemy never
[26:28] Speaker 5: likes that. So I think you get attacked the most
[26:32] Speaker 5: when you're working with people you've grown up with and
[26:38] Speaker 5: known all your life.
[26:39] Speaker 1: So the attack is greater.
[26:41] Speaker 5: And one thing that has helped me is just knowing.
[26:47] Speaker 1: To honor your parents. keeps you alive.
[26:52] Speaker 5: And not just alive physically, but just like it keeps
[26:55] Speaker 5: you blessed. And it's been like test after test after
[26:59] Speaker 5: test of like, you know, business is pressure sometimes.
[27:03] Speaker 1: So pipes are bust.
[27:05] Speaker 5: And some days the conversations ain't too, hey mom, and
[27:09] Speaker 5: woo woo woo.
[27:10] Speaker 1: It's a test going on.
[27:11] Speaker 5: And she never, my pops and my mother, they never
[27:15] Speaker 5: forsaken me no matter what.
[27:17] Speaker 1: How tough things got.
[27:20] Speaker 5: And there was moments where I probably could say that
[27:23] Speaker 5: I forsaken them, but I always got back to honor.
[27:28] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[27:29] Speaker 4: That's beautiful. And no, to your point, like, yeah, the
[27:33] Speaker 4: black family is very important. It's been under attack for years.
[27:37] Speaker 4: It's very important.
[27:38] Speaker 3: I want to hear y'all, though, too, from y'all dynamic
[27:40] Speaker 3: in general.
[27:41] Speaker 2: Working together with her didn't last that long. We worked
[27:44] Speaker 2: together for.
[27:46] Speaker 7: I mean, a long time, but like on the road
[27:48] Speaker 7: and on tour, it was only like a few months.
[27:51] Speaker 7: She got done with touring. She was the DJ originally.
[27:53] Speaker 2: And then at one point she was like, I'm over
[27:55] Speaker 2: this show, I'm going home. And we were in Minnesota
[28:00] Speaker 2: and they left.
[28:02] Speaker 7: They threw me on stage with Jasper and left Brain
[28:04] Speaker 7: to DJ.
[28:05] Speaker 2: I fucked up a bunch of times.
[28:07] Speaker 1: I went to the back.
[28:08] Speaker 7: Then Sid was supposed to come to Toronto. And that
[28:11] Speaker 7: was the next show. And she like didn't come. I
[28:14] Speaker 7: can't remember why you didn't come, but you were like.
[28:15] Speaker 3: I'm not coming back.
[28:16] Speaker 7: And they were like, well, somebody got to do it.
[28:18] Speaker 7: And I just went on stage and imitated her. That's
[28:21] Speaker 7: the only DJ I'd ever seen DJ. So I just
[28:23] Speaker 7: imitated her. But I think for me, it was like,
[28:26] Speaker 7: I was just led by example more than anything. Like
[28:29] Speaker 7: she handled everything so professional. Like it wasn't, it was
[28:32] Speaker 7: a bunch of it. 12 guys and her on a
[28:35] Speaker 7: tour bus. Like, bro, my sister was as sane as
[28:38] Speaker 7: she could possibly be with that going on.
[28:42] Speaker 2: So with that, it's like.
[28:43] Speaker 4: Not very.
[28:47] Speaker 7: I think later on, we learned to not how to
[28:53] Speaker 7: hold each other accountable exactly, but just how to like
[28:56] Speaker 7: acknowledge like, hey, you fucked up.
[28:58] Speaker 2: And it was usually on me.
[29:00] Speaker 3: She was like.
[29:02] Speaker 6: No, no, no.
[29:03] Speaker 7: And it was like, I guess I kind of had like,
[29:08] Speaker 7: not a mom on tour, but I had somebody who
[29:09] Speaker 7: would hold me accountable no matter what.
[29:11] Speaker 1: Yeah.
[29:12] Speaker 3: A real love. Exactly.
[29:17] Speaker 6: Yeah.
[29:17] Speaker 3: This your little brother, so I know how that could feel.
[29:19] Speaker 3: I'm a baby too, so I know my brothers got
[29:21] Speaker 3: a certain dynamic with me where they be like, this
[29:23] Speaker 3: nigga's annoying. We don't want this nigga around. I know
[29:27] Speaker 3: you had to have moments where you was like, this
[29:29] Speaker 3: nigga is killing me.
[29:31] Speaker 4: Honestly, he fit in more to our future than I did,
[29:35] Speaker 4: to be honest. So honestly, when I left the tour, honestly,
[29:39] Speaker 4: it made sense. Also, by the time I left, I
[29:42] Speaker 4: had already put out an album. My band's first album
[29:46] Speaker 4: had already came out. So we left so that we
[29:49] Speaker 4: could tour. I left so that we could tour. I
[29:51] Speaker 4: obviously was done. I was done for other reasons as well. Mostly,
[29:58] Speaker 4: I have depression, clinical depression. And I wasn't medicated at
[30:01] Speaker 4: the time when we started touring and getting out there.
[30:06] Speaker 4: And mind you, when we started touring, Travis wasn't there.
[30:09] Speaker 2: I wasn't allowed because I was too young.
[30:12] Speaker 3: I was 16.
[30:12] Speaker 4: Yeah, he wasn't 18 yet.
[30:14] Speaker 7: So I was only allowed to come do spot dates.
[30:16] Speaker 7: So the whole first tour she did by herself and
[30:17] Speaker 7: then the second real tour. No, you did the first
[30:19] Speaker 7: two tours.
[30:20] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[30:20] Speaker 7: And then I came on when I was 17. We
[30:22] Speaker 7: were doing Loiter Squad and I just flown for spot dates.
[30:24] Speaker 7: I'd come in for a day, go home, come in
[30:26] Speaker 7: for four days, go home. And then it got to
[30:28] Speaker 7: a point where I was able to be there full
[30:31] Speaker 7: time at 17 years old, which is still crazy to
[30:34] Speaker 7: think about.
[30:34] Speaker 2: But yeah, I kind.
[30:37] Speaker 3: Of had.
[30:39] Speaker 7: A babysitter, you would say, with her where it was
[30:42] Speaker 7: just like, I can do a bunch of stupid shit,
[30:44] Speaker 7: but at a certain point I'd had somebody who was
[30:45] Speaker 7: going to be like, get your dumb ass in the
[30:46] Speaker 7: fucking hotel.
[30:49] Speaker 4: I was just going to look at it. I think
[30:50] Speaker 4: by that point, personally, I was like, I'm not mothering him. Also,
[30:58] Speaker 4: him and Tyler are best friends, so I knew he
[31:00] Speaker 4: had somebody there. And Tyler wasn't going to let him
[31:02] Speaker 4: do anything stupid either. So I honestly wasn't worried about
[31:06] Speaker 4: you like that on the road. I was just like,
[31:09] Speaker 4: get me out of here. But it was mostly my
[31:11] Speaker 4: own depression that made it so hard for me to
[31:14] Speaker 4: tour with them. And the fact that I couldn't talk
[31:19] Speaker 4: to any of them about it. we didn't have that
[31:21] Speaker 4: kind of relationship.
[31:23] Speaker 2: We also, nobody was mature enough to have that conversation.
[31:25] Speaker 3: I met y'all then. I knew. I told him when
[31:30] Speaker 3: I first met him, I said, I hated you, nigga,
[31:31] Speaker 3: when I first met you.
[31:33] Speaker 4: Honestly, during that time, during that time, like, I didn't
[31:36] Speaker 4: even talk to him. I didn't start talking to him
[31:39] Speaker 4: again until I moved back into the house.
[31:42] Speaker 6: For real.
[31:43] Speaker 7: The first time we really started talking, for real, for real,
[31:46] Speaker 7: we obviously were siblings, and When you have siblings or
[31:49] Speaker 7: you have family in general, things go through shit, like
[31:53] Speaker 7: you're saying.
[31:53] Speaker 2: It's just moments where you guys aren't on the same level. Yeah,
[31:57] Speaker 2: on the same page.
[31:59] Speaker 7: And she moved back into the house after living somewhere
[32:03] Speaker 7: else for a second. And I was living at the
[32:05] Speaker 7: house at the time. And I think I was 21.
[32:07] Speaker 2: Maybe I was 20.
[32:09] Speaker 4: Yeah, I think so.
[32:11] Speaker 2: I just started smoking weed again.
[32:12] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[32:13] Speaker 2: And so we sat outside, smoked a joint, and it
[32:15] Speaker 2: was like.
[32:15] Speaker 6: Thought you was cool.
[32:16] Speaker 3: Nah, you kinda cool, man.
[32:17] Speaker 6: Yeah, I know.
[32:19] Speaker 4: No, the truth is like, you know, like for instance,
[32:22] Speaker 4: Tyler is, what do they call it, straight edge. So
[32:27] Speaker 4: he doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't do anything. And Travis
[32:30] Speaker 4: was on that same type of time at the time.
[32:33] Speaker 4: But I think, you know, life and tour... He got
[32:36] Speaker 4: home and was like, I'ma hit this kush. He was like,
[32:39] Speaker 4: I don't care what my big homie doing. He don't
[32:42] Speaker 4: have to do this. I'ma hit this kush. You can
[32:44] Speaker 4: do what you do, big fella. And honestly, yeah, I
[32:48] Speaker 4: moved back home around that time when he had started smoking.
[32:51] Speaker 4: I had been smoking.
[32:52] Speaker 6: I was the first one to get you to smoke.
[32:53] Speaker 4: So we started smoking together. Yeah, no, my first time
[32:55] Speaker 4: smoking was within an hour. It was on 420. We
[32:57] Speaker 4: were in high school. And he had got some weed
[33:00] Speaker 4: from some girl at school. And we went, we smoked
[33:04] Speaker 4: it in our favorite backyard. I got so faded. We
[33:08] Speaker 4: all got so faded. We all got so faded.
[33:11] Speaker 3: It was crazy.
[33:12] Speaker 4: But yeah, by then I was like, you know, I
[33:15] Speaker 4: was smoking. Honestly, I was smoking to self-medicate for my depression.
[33:19] Speaker 4: I wasn't on medication at the time. Now I'm medicated.
[33:22] Speaker 4: I've been medicated now for like five years.
[33:25] Speaker 3: That's why I started smoking. My anxiety started just getting crazy.
[33:28] Speaker 3: But part of me feels like sometimes when I do smoke,
[33:30] Speaker 3: this shit is helping my anxiety get stronger.
[33:32] Speaker 6: I'm like, this is not helping me, nigga. This shit
[33:34] Speaker 6: is ending shit.
[33:36] Speaker 5: Anyone know something, though? I just figured something out, right? Bro,
[33:40] Speaker 5: I found out today that.
[33:43] Speaker 1: When you feel.
[33:47] Speaker 5: Like you tweaking a little bit out the weed, it's
[33:49] Speaker 5: just really highlighting something drastic.
[33:55] Speaker 1: Just going on within you.
[33:57] Speaker 5: Like, it's kind of hard to explain, but it's like,
[33:59] Speaker 5: when I realized, I was like, man, I feel a
[34:01] Speaker 5: little unsettled.
[34:02] Speaker 1: And I had nothing to, like, truly lean on, but, like,
[34:05] Speaker 1: just my breath.
[34:07] Speaker 5: And I think, like, once I started to just breathe
[34:10] Speaker 5: a certain way, it, like, put me in control over
[34:14] Speaker 5: the high. I don't know if that makes sense, but
[34:16] Speaker 5: I think, like, what was dope out of it was, like,
[34:19] Speaker 5: some people, some people smoke, but, like, I said I
[34:21] Speaker 5: was tweaking, I was tripping, I was tripping. Or I
[34:24] Speaker 5: think my perception of it is changing. I think when
[34:28] Speaker 5: I smoke, it more so show how my body is
[34:32] Speaker 5: trying to fight against being relaxed.
[34:34] Speaker 1: More so than just like, relax, girl.
[34:38] Speaker 6: You know what I'm saying?
[34:41] Speaker 5: I think my body be like, uh-uh, what the fuck
[34:43] Speaker 5: going on?
[34:44] Speaker 3: Nah, we can't slow down. My body fight that.
[34:48] Speaker 1: And I think the tree... Tries to slow you.
[34:52] Speaker 5: And I think like we just be so fight or
[34:54] Speaker 5: flight that it don't feel right.
[34:56] Speaker 1: And we just be like, hell no.
[35:00] Speaker 2: It can't be true, you know.
[35:01] Speaker 3: Yeah.
[35:02] Speaker 4: No, it's that ebb and flow. They say you just
[35:04] Speaker 4: got to go with it, bro. Like you got to surrender.
[35:07] Speaker 4: That's what I think that's what that is. It's like
[35:09] Speaker 4: surrendering to like what's actually going on instead of trying
[35:13] Speaker 4: to fight it.
[35:13] Speaker 2: The advice you gave me was fucked up. You said,
[35:17] Speaker 2: if you get too high, just keep smoking.
[35:19] Speaker 6: You'll figure it out.
[35:20] Speaker 2: You'll figure it.
[35:21] Speaker 6: And I was like, all right.
[35:22] Speaker 4: I say this.
[35:23] Speaker 3: You was high for sure. You was high for sure.
[35:27] Speaker 4: Nah, he be giving me, he be tossing me one-liners
[35:30] Speaker 4: I don't even remember saying.
[35:31] Speaker 1: When I get too high, I pray.
[35:33] Speaker 6: When you get too high, you pray?
[35:35] Speaker 1: I pray.
[35:36] Speaker 4: Oh, word.
[35:36] Speaker 6: That's probably the best thing. That's probably the best thing
[35:39] Speaker 6: to do.
[35:39] Speaker 1: I'm going to be 100, like, brother power of prayer, real.
[35:43] Speaker 5: Whenever I get too high, if I feel like I'm
[35:45] Speaker 5: too over, I go straight to praying and I just
[35:48] Speaker 5: be like, Heavenly Father, you know, I apologize.
[35:54] Speaker 3: I ain't been that high yet, jumping to prayer.
[35:57] Speaker 6: I believe in myself.
[35:58] Speaker 3: I definitely will breathe, like you said.
[36:00] Speaker 5: I think it shows you in real, because of how
[36:04] Speaker 5: heightened you is, it shows in real time how, like
[36:07] Speaker 5: if you really, intentionally create the space for it.
[36:10] Speaker 1: When you, when you have, I swear on everything, it worked.
[36:13] Speaker 1: So smoke with Jesus.
[36:14] Speaker 3: I got you. You gotta bring, you gotta bring God everywhere, bro.
[36:19] Speaker 6: You gotta bring him everywhere.
[36:21] Speaker 4: That's, that's a fever.
[36:22] Speaker 2: I'm telling you.
[36:24] Speaker 5: I think, I think I got baptized when I was
[36:27] Speaker 5: little too, though, right? When I was, yeah, I got
[36:29] Speaker 5: baptized when I was little, but.
[36:31] Speaker 3: So you got re-baptized recently?
[36:32] Speaker 1: Yeah, I got re-baptized.
[36:33] Speaker 3: What made you want to do that? Brother?
[36:36] Speaker 5: Man, I went through a, uh, a strong period of
[36:40] Speaker 5: my life, like, trying to find me.
[36:44] Speaker 1: And I think.
[36:47] Speaker 5: Literally being judged since I was 16, really 14, on
[36:52] Speaker 5: a microscope to a lot of people, I think it
[36:56] Speaker 5: unconsciously took an effect on me to where it's like
[36:59] Speaker 5: I tried to start to fit into all of the
[37:02] Speaker 5: boxes people wanted to put me in. Like, really got
[37:07] Speaker 5: caught up judgment and started to look in the mirror
[37:13] Speaker 5: and just see something about me where I felt like
[37:16] Speaker 5: maybe I'm not good enough or maybe.
[37:18] Speaker 1: I need to change this or change that.
[37:22] Speaker 5: God permitted all of the attacks, permitted all of the confusion.
[37:27] Speaker 5: He permitted every single attack on my mind, every thought.
[37:31] Speaker 1: He permitted it.
[37:34] Speaker 5: He knew that I was going to keep seeking and
[37:36] Speaker 5: keep fighting and I came full circle. with accepting Jesus
[37:41] Speaker 5: Christ into my life because I found true peace in
[37:46] Speaker 5: knowing I didn't have to be perfect. Like someone has.
[37:48] Speaker 1: Literally already walked that for me.
[37:52] Speaker 5: And I remember like I was wrestling with the Jesus peace,
[37:56] Speaker 5: not the one on your neck.
[37:57] Speaker 6: But like Jesus peace.
[37:58] Speaker 5: Like I was wrestling with that for a time. And
[38:04] Speaker 5: I didn't understand the importance of Christ. I didn't understand
[38:09] Speaker 5: why you couldn't just go straight to the Father or God.
[38:13] Speaker 1: I didn't understand the mediator portion of it.
[38:17] Speaker 7: I know what you're saying, the.
[38:20] Speaker 2: Messenger, I guess.
[38:20] Speaker 1: The messenger, yeah. Vessel. Him as a vessel.
[38:25] Speaker 5: I didn't understand it, but as I kept seeking, kept learning,
[38:29] Speaker 5: I'm always like, I just want to find truth so
[38:32] Speaker 5: I can go to sleep.
[38:32] Speaker 1: And know that I'm good. Yeah, yeah. And wake up
[38:35] Speaker 1: and know I'm good. Man, I just kept seeking, bro. Yeah.
[38:39] Speaker 1: And Christ.
[38:40] Speaker 5: I swear, his power and his name, when I called
[38:43] Speaker 5: out to his name, it literally like, like something like
[38:48] Speaker 5: shed it in me and died on the spot. And
[38:51] Speaker 5: it's like, it was, the feeling was so overwhelming that.
[38:58] Speaker 1: I thought I was going to die.
[39:00] Speaker 5: Like, like I genuinely, I genuinely like was frustrated. was
[39:08] Speaker 5: feeling like I was transitioning. Was it ego death? Literally.
[39:14] Speaker 1: I kid you not. I swear to God.
[39:17] Speaker 5: I was sitting on the balcony and I kept just
[39:21] Speaker 5: calling out to Jesus. I kept calling and calling and calling.
[39:25] Speaker 5: And the spirit overtook me and I literally started to
[39:31] Speaker 5: just feel my body, just feel his presence. And I
[39:35] Speaker 5: just felt my body just kept leaning. And I just
[39:38] Speaker 5: kept leaning and I just kept slouching.
[39:40] Speaker 1: And I was like, in my mind, I was like,
[39:42] Speaker 1: what is happening? And then I heard his voice. He said,
[39:45] Speaker 1: just let it happen. Just let it happen. Surrender.
[39:48] Speaker 3: Like, just relax. Right?
[39:50] Speaker 1: With the tree.
[39:51] Speaker 3: Just relax.
[39:53] Speaker 1: Just trust.
[39:54] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[39:54] Speaker 6: I'm with you.
[39:55] Speaker 3: Trust the process.
[39:56] Speaker 4: Trust the universe.
[39:56] Speaker 6: You're not about to die like that.
[39:58] Speaker 3: That's what I really wanted to make sure.
[39:59] Speaker 6: I'm like.
[40:00] Speaker 4: You ain't going to die. That's not good.
[40:03] Speaker 6: You needed me to get here just so I could.
[40:06] Speaker 3: So I could be good when I come back.
[40:07] Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, that's no fun. I done said to.
[40:10] Speaker 3: Christ, nah.
[40:11] Speaker 6: I said, damn. Wait a little longer.
[40:15] Speaker 1: No, but like.
[40:17] Speaker 5: It happened, but since that day, he restored me in
[40:26] Speaker 5: a manner I can't complain. The restoration wasn't nothing exoteric.
[40:31] Speaker 5: It was more so within. Every single thing within me
[40:35] Speaker 5: just started to feel better. I tell people, I said,
[40:38] Speaker 5: I was baptized before I got baptized.
[40:41] Speaker 1: He restored me.
[40:45] Speaker 5: Still restoring, but like the starter kit of my restoration
[40:50] Speaker 5: is appreciated.
[40:50] Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying?
[40:52] Speaker 4: That's beautiful.
[40:53] Speaker 2: Yeah, it is.
[40:55] Speaker 3: Damn, that was great.
[40:58] Speaker 2: Y'all ready to go home?
[40:59] Speaker 3: Two times I've been like, man, that was crazy.
[41:02] Speaker 6: I get it, I get it.
[41:03] Speaker 4: Remind me of this one time. I smoked DMT.
[41:07] Speaker 1: Okay.
[41:08] Speaker 3: How was that? You would touch God.
[41:12] Speaker 6: For sure.
[41:13] Speaker 4: Similar vibes.
[41:14] Speaker 2: I've been scared of that.
[41:15] Speaker 7: I think like for me, ayahuasca has been something I
[41:17] Speaker 7: looked at as far as like getting an ego death
[41:20] Speaker 7: out of. But I think that's like something you kind
[41:22] Speaker 7: of find within yourself rather than going to seek it.
[41:24] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[41:25] Speaker 7: I think that'll, I personally think that'll happen when I
[41:28] Speaker 7: have children. I think when I realize that something is
[41:31] Speaker 7: more important than me, not saying that I'm the most
[41:33] Speaker 7: important thing in the universe, but like, When my care
[41:36] Speaker 7: for myself is beyond just for me, I think that's
[41:40] Speaker 7: when I realize, like, damn.
[41:41] Speaker 5: I think, too, though, like, that word balance, bro, like,
[41:45] Speaker 5: I feel like it's good ego, too. Like, I feel
[41:47] Speaker 5: like you got good ego and you got good pride.
[41:51] Speaker 1: Like, for real, for real, like, I feel like it's okay.
[41:55] Speaker 5: Like, the main thing is just, like, I was in
[41:59] Speaker 5: search of a perfect version of me or, like, a
[42:01] Speaker 5: fix the whole.
[42:03] Speaker 1: Time, like, No, I was made how I was made
[42:06] Speaker 1: for a reason.
[42:08] Speaker 5: And I stopped trying to critique and just started to
[42:11] Speaker 5: just accept. I'm like, all right, bro, you ain't the
[42:15] Speaker 5: best in this area.
[42:17] Speaker 1: Just stop trying.
[42:19] Speaker 7: Just figure out how to live.
[42:21] Speaker 5: In something and just, I don't know, just allow it
[42:25] Speaker 5: to be instead of fight it.
[42:28] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[42:30] Speaker 1: But I love my ego, like on God, like because.
[42:34] Speaker 4: No, it's funny because I have an album called Ego Death,
[42:36] Speaker 4: but like I've never experienced it.
[42:38] Speaker 1: Sometimes I need it.
[42:40] Speaker 4: And I don't think, and I agree with you. I
[42:42] Speaker 4: think the ego is a necessary tool because it reminds,
[42:46] Speaker 4: it's the thing that reminds us our worth. The issue
[42:49] Speaker 4: is when it gets inflated, it'll tell you you're worth
[42:51] Speaker 4: more than you are. Because you're never worth more than
[42:54] Speaker 4: the next human being. You know, but an inflated ego
[42:58] Speaker 4: will make you think you are. I think a lot
[43:01] Speaker 4: of people need ego death. Some people have inflated egos,
[43:04] Speaker 4: but um.
[43:05] Speaker 2: That make me sound like I got an inflated ego.
[43:07] Speaker 3: Hey, she pointed at you twice.
[43:08] Speaker 4: No, no.
[43:10] Speaker 3: Some people do.
[43:10] Speaker 4: We're not talking about him.
[43:11] Speaker 3: We can talk at home.
[43:12] Speaker 4: I'm not talking about him. I promise, I promise.
[43:15] Speaker 3: No, no.
[43:16] Speaker 4: No, I feel like. Or you, I'm not talking about
[43:18] Speaker 4: anybody here. I'm just, yeah, I'm a firm believer that
[43:22] Speaker 4: like the ego is a helpful tool. It'll make sure
[43:25] Speaker 4: you don't get taken advantage of out here.
[43:27] Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess that's the weird thing.
[43:29] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[43:30] Speaker 1: Just to balance it.
[43:30] Speaker 5: Facts.
[43:31] Speaker 4: And pride, too. You know? There's pride.
[43:35] Speaker 3: Pride for having pride.
[43:36] Speaker 4: Right. There's pride that goes past the point of being helpful.
[43:40] Speaker 5: And that word accountability you said was just like what
[43:44] Speaker 5: made y'all connect the most on tour. And just like
[43:47] Speaker 5: in general in life with having her around was just
[43:49] Speaker 5: like someone holding you accountable, man.
[43:54] Speaker 4: Family's good for that.
[43:54] Speaker 1: Yeah, it's great for that.
[43:55] Speaker 2: I can't hide.
[43:56] Speaker 3: I can't hide. You know what I mean?
[43:59] Speaker 2: It's hard to hide from family.
[44:00] Speaker 7: Like, you can do all these things, say all these things, but, like,
[44:03] Speaker 7: your family.
[44:04] Speaker 2: Really knows you.
[44:05] Speaker 7: My sister and me lived in the house together for
[44:07] Speaker 7: a month.
[44:08] Speaker 4: We shared a bathroom.
[44:09] Speaker 3: Yeah, like, it's different.
[44:10] Speaker 7: Like, we know each other through and through, and so
[44:12] Speaker 7: for that, it's like, there is no room for me
[44:15] Speaker 7: to act like somebody else or do some other shit
[44:16] Speaker 7: that would be outlandish or just not in my character
[44:18] Speaker 7: in front of her.
[44:19] Speaker 2: She would just be like, what are you doing? Like,
[44:21] Speaker 2: it's just a simple question.
[44:22] Speaker 4: I'd probably ask if you were okay, but yeah.
[44:25] Speaker 2: Yeah, you would ask me very like, are you okay?
[44:28] Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm fine, whatever. Why?
[44:30] Speaker 3: So my family knows me, but I feel like also
[44:32] Speaker 3: I moved here at 19. So you don't know me
[44:35] Speaker 3: either as an adult. I know a different version of you.
[44:37] Speaker 3: My siblings, I didn't live with them, and then I'm
[44:39] Speaker 3: the baby. So they were all out of the house
[44:41] Speaker 3: before me.
[44:41] Speaker 2: You're the baby, and you're also the most successful person.
[44:44] Speaker 5: Yes. That is true. It's a version of like.
[44:48] Speaker 3: Well, my wife knows me the most, in my opinion,
[44:50] Speaker 3: just because from there, they all left the house two, four,
[44:54] Speaker 3: six years before I did. So by the time my
[44:57] Speaker 3: sister was left, I was 12. So you don't really
[44:59] Speaker 3: know me as an adult, so to speak.
[45:01] Speaker 1: You know what I mean?
[45:02] Speaker 3: But yeah, I do agree. It's tougher when you have
[45:06] Speaker 3: that side of it, because I feel like you don't
[45:07] Speaker 3: get to have as much of a relationship as through
[45:10] Speaker 3: the phones. or it's through you trying to take some
[45:13] Speaker 3: trips here and there or flying everybody out here, but
[45:15] Speaker 3: then you only get so many days together and you
[45:17] Speaker 3: feel like, you know, I do try to accept accountability
[45:21] Speaker 3: from those, my siblings and stuff, but I feel like
[45:25] Speaker 3: I probably know people here a little more. Like some
[45:28] Speaker 3: of my friends and like my, you know what I mean? Like,
[45:30] Speaker 3: I don't say mentors, but like big homies as we
[45:32] Speaker 3: were speaking of, you feel like I still met a
[45:34] Speaker 3: lot of those individuals out here, but I feel like
[45:36] Speaker 3: they know me a little more. But, you know, it's
[45:39] Speaker 3: tough because I feel like my brother's, see me in
[45:42] Speaker 3: a way, you know, therapy will tell you that your
[45:44] Speaker 3: siblings or people a lot of times can only see
[45:46] Speaker 3: you in the last moment they had dominion over you
[45:48] Speaker 3: or they were bigger than you. And I'm the baby,
[45:51] Speaker 3: so I think I never am able to lose that.
[45:55] Speaker 3: You're the baby. Like, what the fuck do you know?
[45:57] Speaker 6: I could do everything in the world.
[45:58] Speaker 3: I could have every business, take care of your lives
[46:01] Speaker 3: in this way. They still look at you and be like, thank.
[46:03] Speaker 4: You, baby.
[46:06] Speaker 3: You're like, damn, that's crazy.
[46:07] Speaker 4: That's deep. Do you have siblings?
[46:10] Speaker 1: Oh, I got two brothers and one sister.
[46:13] Speaker 2: What are your age, what are your differences?
[46:14] Speaker 1: I'm the youngest.
[46:15] Speaker 3: You're the youngest.
[46:16] Speaker 7: So you get, we're three youngest and.
[46:18] Speaker 3: Because we get to watch their mistakes. Yeah, but she didn't.
[46:21] Speaker 2: Make no fucking mistakes, bro.
[46:22] Speaker 1: I made a lot of mistakes, though. Yeah.
[46:24] Speaker 2: You didn't make many mistakes.
[46:26] Speaker 1: Yeah, my brother was learning.
[46:27] Speaker 4: I didn't like being spoken to.
[46:31] Speaker 1: At all?
[46:32] Speaker 4: At all. I mean, I did whatever I had to
[46:34] Speaker 4: do to, like, make sure adults did not talk to me.
[46:37] Speaker 2: Shh.
[46:38] Speaker 4: So I got good grades, I didn't talk back to nobody.
[46:42] Speaker 4: You got it?
[46:42] Speaker 2: She used to talk back to kids at school for
[46:45] Speaker 2: fucking her sleep.
[46:46] Speaker 4: Yeah, okay. I was a big class sleeper. But I
[46:50] Speaker 4: also got good grades and I also wasn't about that like,
[46:54] Speaker 4: you over here doing the most. Like, shut up or
[46:57] Speaker 4: go home. That was my thing. So yeah, it was
[47:01] Speaker 4: a time, it was a year in high school where
[47:03] Speaker 4: I was cussing kids out in class for like being loud.
[47:09] Speaker 3: What was he like in high school?
[47:11] Speaker 4: Terrible.
[47:12] Speaker 3: Oh, what?
[47:13] Speaker 6: That's what he kind of said.
[47:15] Speaker 3: He brags about it too. He's like, yeah, I did
[47:16] Speaker 3: what I wanted to do and nothing happened. And I'm like, nigga,
[47:19] Speaker 3: what is this?
[47:20] Speaker 6: Yeah.
[47:21] Speaker 4: No, honestly, nothing happened until he got an adult and
[47:24] Speaker 4: got knocked the fuck out.
[47:25] Speaker 6: Oh, he didn't tell this story.
[47:27] Speaker 3: Never. He told me he'd be knocking niggas out left
[47:32] Speaker 3: and right. Nah, I didn't get punched in the mouth.
[47:35] Speaker 2: I got punched in the mouth as an adult, and
[47:37] Speaker 2: it changed my whole perspective on life.
[47:38] Speaker 4: It changed his life.
[47:38] Speaker 3: That does for everybody.
[47:39] Speaker 6: Because he was.
[47:41] Speaker 4: A kid with mad big homies. Nobody could mess with him.
[47:45] Speaker 7: He got away with everything. And I'd have like five
[47:49] Speaker 7: niggas ready to fight for me.
[47:56] Speaker 4: But no, funny thing is like we were pretty much
[48:01] Speaker 4: chill unless we went to school together. We're two years apart, right?
[48:04] Speaker 4: So we'd overlap sometimes where we end up at the
[48:07] Speaker 4: same school. And mom pointed it out to me once.
[48:10] Speaker 4: She was like, y'all fight more when y'all are going
[48:12] Speaker 4: to the same school.
[48:13] Speaker 3: That's valid.
[48:14] Speaker 4: Because we'd see each other all goddamn day.
[48:16] Speaker 6: Yeah.
[48:17] Speaker 4: Picked up, same car riding home. And I done seen
[48:20] Speaker 4: the bullshit he was.
[48:20] Speaker 6: Doing at school.
[48:22] Speaker 4: You don't know. I had to like, I had to
[48:24] Speaker 4: throw a basketball at a nigga head today. Brandon Weiss.
[48:26] Speaker 4: Because he was finna get his ass whooped.
[48:28] Speaker 2: Brandon Weiss.
[48:29] Speaker 6: And it was his fault.
[48:30] Speaker 4: He would have deserved it.
[48:31] Speaker 6: But I couldn't let it happen.
[48:33] Speaker 2: And me and him got into it and he chased
[48:35] Speaker 2: me around.
[48:35] Speaker 7: I was like, yeah, she came to my rescue.
[48:39] Speaker 2: Low brother energy for sure.
[48:41] Speaker 7: Yeah.
[48:41] Speaker 2: But we also, do we fight much physically?
[48:44] Speaker 3: Yeah.
[48:44] Speaker 4: Um, like a few times, but again, it was probably
[48:48] Speaker 4: like we were going to the same school. We were
[48:51] Speaker 4: seeing too much of each other.
[48:52] Speaker 3: And you was way cooler. You hooped and stuff too, right?
[48:55] Speaker 4: Yeah, we both did.
[48:55] Speaker 3: Oh, you hooped there too? No, I know you played basketball.
[48:59] Speaker 2: Y'all know he's fucking with me right now.
[49:02] Speaker 4: To your point.
[49:02] Speaker 2: He's trying me right now.
[49:04] Speaker 4: To his point.
[49:05] Speaker 2: He's not being nice.
[49:05] Speaker 4: To his point, I took basketball more seriously.
[49:08] Speaker 6: When we were kids. That's what he said.
[49:09] Speaker 2: Oh, no, no.
[49:10] Speaker 3: I did.
[49:10] Speaker 7: Okay, you know when you're a kid and you're hooping
[49:13] Speaker 7: like your homies are hooping.
[49:14] Speaker 2: Y'all play basketball. Y'all love basketball. Sid took it a
[49:16] Speaker 2: step further. Sid had like a personal coach. She went
[49:19] Speaker 2: to go learn how to shoot more and learn. Like,
[49:21] Speaker 2: she did drills.
[49:22] Speaker 6: I was just like, I'm trying to hoop, bro.
[49:24] Speaker 2: I'm just nasty.
[49:24] Speaker 4: No, I did both. Like, honestly, by the time I
[49:27] Speaker 4: got to high school and I realized people, like, cared
[49:30] Speaker 4: so much, I was like, oh.
[49:34] Speaker 3: But you cared somewhat to go get a coach. Like,
[49:36] Speaker 3: everybody doesn't.
[49:37] Speaker 4: He lived on it. like a block away from, I
[49:39] Speaker 4: walked to his house.
[49:40] Speaker 2: This is true.
[49:41] Speaker 4: It was easy.
[49:42] Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's still like, even Bron talked about like
[49:44] Speaker 3: he didn't have a real workout or workout until he
[49:47] Speaker 3: made it to the league damn near. Right. To at
[49:49] Speaker 3: least have the presence of mind as a youngin to
[49:51] Speaker 3: be like, I'm going to get a coach to put
[49:53] Speaker 3: in this effort to be better at something. It's not
[49:55] Speaker 3: something people always have until maybe later on in their life.
[49:57] Speaker 3: They realize there's certain work that needs to go into
[50:00] Speaker 3: things and stuff like that. I was really good like
[50:02] Speaker 3: you at basketball, but I wasn't necessarily working hard at all.
[50:07] Speaker 3: I had all natural ability. It was really good.
[50:09] Speaker 2: I was doing the bare minimum.
[50:10] Speaker 3: Yeah, me too. And only when my coach was watching.
[50:13] Speaker 3: If I watched the other niggas stay after practice, I'd
[50:15] Speaker 3: have to stay after practice just pretending and shit.
[50:17] Speaker 6: See, that wasn't me.
[50:19] Speaker 4: Look, I got to high school. I did tryouts. Ninth grade,
[50:23] Speaker 4: I did tryouts. I made the JV team or whatever.
[50:25] Speaker 4: Our coaches were just... They were terrible and they were ass.
[50:31] Speaker 4: So not only did they get fired, I quit the team.
[50:34] Speaker 4: I made it through conditioning just so nobody could call
[50:36] Speaker 4: me a bitch. And then I showed up to game one,
[50:40] Speaker 4: no uniform and was like, I think I'm done.
[50:46] Speaker 3: I love showing up still.
[50:47] Speaker 4: Yeah, I had to show up.
[50:49] Speaker 3: In a suit.
[50:50] Speaker 6: I showed up in jeans.
[50:51] Speaker 4: So I think I'm good. He was like, all right.
[50:56] Speaker 4: Didn't even look at me, this old nigga walked with
[50:59] Speaker 4: a lamp. Didn't even look at me, right?
[51:01] Speaker 6: All good.
[51:01] Speaker 4: I kept playing basketball at school during lunch, nutrition or whatever,
[51:05] Speaker 4: because I still like, I got to a point where
[51:08] Speaker 4: I really didn't care that much about the seriousness of it.
[51:11] Speaker 4: It was just something to do. And I didn't have
[51:13] Speaker 4: friends like that in school. So my friends were the
[51:16] Speaker 4: kids that played basketball. And lo and behold, like next year, Like,
[51:24] Speaker 4: I'm playing basketball at lunch and nutrition or whatever. The
[51:26] Speaker 4: boys coach comes up to me and is like, are
[51:28] Speaker 4: you doing tryouts this year for the girls team? I
[51:31] Speaker 4: was like, nah, nigga. Them coaches are ass. He was like, well,
[51:36] Speaker 4: they got fired. I was like, of course they did.
[51:39] Speaker 4: He was like, I'm coaching the girls team this year
[51:41] Speaker 4: if you want to come back. I was like, hell yeah,
[51:43] Speaker 4: I'll pull up. So I pulled up for, like, some practices.
[51:46] Speaker 4: And then I switched schools and went to a music academy.
[51:50] Speaker 4: You play basketball in high school?
[51:55] Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. That sounds similar to my story.
[51:57] Speaker 5: It's like getting stripped out of sports and then getting
[52:01] Speaker 5: positioned to make music.
[52:02] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[52:03] Speaker 2: Was your first goal making the NBA or was your,
[52:06] Speaker 2: like as a kid were you like?
[52:07] Speaker 5: I was football and basketball so I used to play
[52:10] Speaker 5: running back but I took more liking towards basketball. Love
[52:14] Speaker 5: Kobe and love Kobe. That was like my guy so.
[52:18] Speaker 3: You a Grizzlies fan?
[52:20] Speaker 1: I'm actually a Laker. I'm a Kobe fan, for real.
[52:23] Speaker 4: Nice.
[52:24] Speaker 3: I was a Laker.
[52:24] Speaker 1: I ain't got no team. You ain't got no team? Nah,
[52:28] Speaker 1: I just enjoy the sport.
[52:29] Speaker 3: That's the same thing I'd be trying to tell them.
[52:31] Speaker 3: It gets too intense when you start doing the team
[52:34] Speaker 3: shit too much.
[52:34] Speaker 1: I love players.
[52:35] Speaker 4: If you from L.A., though.
[52:37] Speaker 6: It's different.
[52:38] Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying.
[52:39] Speaker 4: If you're from L.A., especially like.
[52:40] Speaker 3: I grew up in Chicago during the Jordan era, y'all.
[52:42] Speaker 3: What do you mean?
[52:43] Speaker 2: Your dad didn't like Michael Jordan.
[52:44] Speaker 3: Chill, brother. So you don't get it?
[52:48] Speaker 6: You should understand.
[52:50] Speaker 1: No, okay, well, y'all... Why your dad didn't like Michael Jordan?
[52:54] Speaker 6: My dad was.
[52:55] Speaker 3: I come from an aggressively pro-black home. My dad felt
[52:58] Speaker 3: like the Bulls organization used to pick like mediocre white
[53:00] Speaker 3: guys over like like decent black players, so he made
[53:04] Speaker 3: us all root for the Knicks, because it was an
[53:05] Speaker 3: all black team. It was an all black team, so nigga,
[53:08] Speaker 3: we just grew up.
[53:08] Speaker 2: Being like, the Knicks!
[53:10] Speaker 3: I cried when Patrick, you and Mr. Lane up in Chicago.
[53:12] Speaker 3: I was like, why am I going to, I grew up,
[53:15] Speaker 3: I ain't gonna lie, I grew up and hated that
[53:16] Speaker 3: nigga for it, because I was like, I could have
[53:17] Speaker 3: been celebrating a whole bunch as a kid. We lived
[53:20] Speaker 3: on the west side, by the United Center. I could
[53:22] Speaker 3: have been like, cheering with everybody else outside, shooting guns.
[53:24] Speaker 2: Wearing Jordans.
[53:25] Speaker 3: I mean, I would piss.
[53:26] Speaker 6: The fuck off.
[53:27] Speaker 2: In some Adidas shit.
[53:29] Speaker 6: Yeah, piss.
[53:29] Speaker 1: He wasn't like... Jack Bushler.
[53:32] Speaker 3: He drew the line at. What was it?
[53:35] Speaker 1: The governor? Which one?
[53:39] Speaker 5: They had this thing where they wanted Michael to vote
[53:43] Speaker 5: a mayor.
[53:44] Speaker 1: Vote a mayor in.
[53:45] Speaker 2: Oh, they want him to be political. Yeah.
[53:47] Speaker 3: Oh, which one was that? Was it for Harold Washington?
[53:50] Speaker 3: I can't remember.
[53:51] Speaker 2: They wanted him to be political and he was like,
[53:52] Speaker 2: I ain't with all that shit.
[53:53] Speaker 5: Yeah, I was like, I thought that's why your dad
[53:56] Speaker 5: did it.
[53:57] Speaker 2: No, no.
[53:58] Speaker 6: It wasn't that?
[53:59] Speaker 3: I think he was just hating on Mike.
[54:00] Speaker 1: But they were probably nailing the coffin for sure.
[54:02] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[54:02] Speaker 4: Growing up during the Kobe era, and playing basketball in L.A.
[54:12] Speaker 4: was crazy.
[54:14] Speaker 1: Kobe.
[54:15] Speaker 3: I rooted for Kobe in them. I was a big
[54:16] Speaker 3: Shaq fan. I followed him wherever he went. I loved
[54:20] Speaker 3: Kobe until Shaq told me not to like Kobe no more.
[54:24] Speaker 3: I stopped like, tell me how my ass tastes. Got it, James.
[54:29] Speaker 1: Yeah.
[54:30] Speaker 2: Sid, your album came out July 17th?
[54:32] Speaker 1: Yes.
[54:32] Speaker 3: Yes.
[54:35] Speaker 2: I remember that. I don't remember motherfuckers birthday. I remember
[54:37] Speaker 2: that for some reason.
[54:39] Speaker 3: Congratulations.
[54:40] Speaker 7: First and foremost, I'm very proud of you. My favorite
[54:43] Speaker 7: song is Jasmine 17.
[54:45] Speaker 4: Wow.
[54:45] Speaker 1: Yeah.
[54:46] Speaker 4: That's surprising.
[54:46] Speaker 2: Really love that song.
[54:50] Speaker 7: Does it feel different putting out music now versus when
[54:52] Speaker 7: you first put out music? I'm going to go to
[54:53] Speaker 7: you on that too, but yeah, is what is the
[54:56] Speaker 7: biggest difference between now and then? Is it just getting
[54:59] Speaker 7: over the hump of putting out your first shit or
[55:00] Speaker 7: is it like, expectations are different now for what you
[55:05] Speaker 7: want and how you want your music to be received?
[55:07] Speaker 5: Yeah.
[55:08] Speaker 4: Oh, um, I'd say like now I feel like I just,
[55:15] Speaker 4: before I was feeling, I felt like I was putting
[55:17] Speaker 4: out music, um, half, halfway for like a means to
[55:22] Speaker 4: an end. Like I want to buy a house. So
[55:26] Speaker 4: now that I have a house, I'm chilling. I put
[55:30] Speaker 4: the album out and I looked around and I was like, Yeah,
[55:33] Speaker 4: if my life didn't change after this album dropped, that's fine.
[55:37] Speaker 4: I really like my life right now.
[55:40] Speaker 2: You found peace in your success. Yeah.
[55:43] Speaker 4: Thank you. Yeah, exactly. Real gratitude. Yeah. And it feels
[55:48] Speaker 4: like abundance. You know, when they say, like, abundance, abundance.
[55:53] Speaker 4: You know, it's like when you feel like, okay, like,
[55:56] Speaker 4: I put it out.
[55:58] Speaker 1: Great.
[55:58] Speaker 5: Then it's also about, like, just keep working and then
[56:01] Speaker 5: keep trusting it, too. Sometimes I think we, I always
[56:05] Speaker 5: look at like releasing songs and like albums.
[56:08] Speaker 1: It's like making it to the NBA.
[56:10] Speaker 5: Like you can't be the first round draft pick and
[56:13] Speaker 5: then just be like, all right, I'm done. Like it's
[56:17] Speaker 5: really a, it's really a journey to work a song nowadays.
[56:21] Speaker 1: And it takes a lot of time.
[56:25] Speaker 5: If it's something that you're trying to experiment with for sure.
[56:29] Speaker 5: But if it's I've been away from my like core
[56:32] Speaker 5: fan base a little bit because I had to make sure.
[56:36] Speaker 1: Like I was like the Lord is pleased with me.
[56:41] Speaker 5: Like if I'm releasing certain music that's not in reflection
[56:46] Speaker 5: of like the word, I think it was kind of
[56:51] Speaker 5: like causing a cognitive like dissonance in my mind where
[56:55] Speaker 5: I just felt guilty or something.
[56:57] Speaker 1: And I think, like, that's, like, where he's been breaking
[57:00] Speaker 1: me out.
[57:00] Speaker 5: He was, like, pretty much what I receive is that, like,
[57:04] Speaker 5: you know, that's not something that's, like, you know, art
[57:08] Speaker 5: isn't to be judged.
[57:11] Speaker 1: Like, art is only to be made. You know, God
[57:14] Speaker 1: created darkness.
[57:16] Speaker 5: I was, like, running from, like, the dark aspect of
[57:19] Speaker 5: me instead of, like, just creating it and putting it
[57:23] Speaker 5: out with.
[57:23] Speaker 1: No, like, No guilt behind it.
[57:26] Speaker 5: Like, hey, bro, like, you know, I killed y'all in
[57:28] Speaker 5: the booth.
[57:29] Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying?
[57:30] Speaker 5: Like, I killed you in the booth so I could
[57:33] Speaker 5: stay free here. But what do you do with it?
[57:36] Speaker 1: You just trash it or you.
[57:37] Speaker 3: Put it out?
[57:37] Speaker 5: Nah, I'm going to put it out. They're going to
[57:40] Speaker 5: judge you for this. They're going to say, oh, he's
[57:42] Speaker 5: just woo, woo, woo.
[57:43] Speaker 1: He's supposed to be this. Nah, I think I'm pleased.
[57:46] Speaker 1: When I'm receiving, I'm pleased. Like, he's pleased with me.
[57:49] Speaker 5: So, you know, I think that's been like the toughest
[57:52] Speaker 5: thing of like released and then and now. But now
[57:55] Speaker 5: I'm breaking out of that mindset where I'm like, you know, man,
[57:59] Speaker 5: look here, bro. Whatever y'all feel about it, feel it.
[58:02] Speaker 3: Yeah.
[58:02] Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying? But, you know, this don't
[58:06] Speaker 1: define me. Yeah. But this is my art.
[58:09] Speaker 3: Has that changed your creative process? Like, in trying to
[58:12] Speaker 3: make sure that, I guess, the music that you're putting
[58:15] Speaker 3: out or creating is pleasing God in that way?
[58:19] Speaker 5: Yeah.
[58:19] Speaker 1: I think it made me a lot more intentional. And, um.
[58:24] Speaker 5: I think it's always shown me, I think it's also
[58:27] Speaker 5: been showing me that.
[58:32] Speaker 1: He's showing me.
[58:33] Speaker 5: Like, back then it was like Michael, but now he's
[58:41] Speaker 5: showing me that we're.
[58:44] Speaker 1: In a different generation.
[58:46] Speaker 5: It's like a different covenant to where it's like what
[58:49] Speaker 5: some kids see as a superhero is are different from
[58:54] Speaker 5: the superheroes back then. So it's like, they want someone
[58:59] Speaker 5: that looks more cooler to receive a message from. So
[59:03] Speaker 5: it's like, what I realized was that like, you know,
[59:08] Speaker 5: me being NLE Choppa isn't a demonic thing I think
[59:12] Speaker 5: me being NLE Choppa is like a.
[59:18] Speaker 1: It's like the bait it's like.
[59:19] Speaker 5: The real people ran to Bryson and I think once
[59:24] Speaker 5: I started looking at how he placed me and positioned
[59:28] Speaker 5: me I start to realize like, oh.
[59:31] Speaker 1: I'm okay. I'm fine with doing this. You know what
[59:34] Speaker 1: I'm saying?
[59:35] Speaker 5: Now, still living it is different, but if I'm artistically
[59:39] Speaker 5: in a space creating something.
[59:41] Speaker 2: That I feel like, I don't like that. Like, you
[59:44] Speaker 2: sure about this?
[59:46] Speaker 5: Like, being that uncomfortable creating, I'm back being that uncomfortable
[59:50] Speaker 5: to where it's like- It makes the best art.
[59:53] Speaker 1: I'm judging myself, and I'm like, fuck it.
[59:56] Speaker 4: I think that's how you learn yourself or learn to
[1:00:00] Speaker 4: accept yourself. Something I realized with this release too, because
[1:00:06] Speaker 4: I'm also, you know, I'm in my thirties. I started
[1:00:12] Speaker 4: dropping music when I was 19, I guess. And it's
[1:00:20] Speaker 4: taken a long time to, I feel like we talk
[1:00:24] Speaker 4: about finding ourselves, right? And we've all experienced that process
[1:00:29] Speaker 4: of trying to find who we are, figure out who
[1:00:33] Speaker 4: we are. And then I got to a point where
[1:00:36] Speaker 4: I was like, oh, I always knew who I was.
[1:00:39] Speaker 4: I thought I was looking for it. I was just
[1:00:42] Speaker 4: trying to accept it. And it's a never ending process.
[1:00:49] Speaker 4: You know, I think we all feel like sometimes like
[1:00:51] Speaker 4: we feel like, okay, I made it. Woo, done with that.
[1:00:54] Speaker 6: Next.
[1:00:54] Speaker 4: Saturn return is over.
[1:00:56] Speaker 6: You know what I mean?
[1:00:57] Speaker 4: And it's like, yeah, enjoy that. You know, like just
[1:01:00] Speaker 4: enjoy it. That's what presence is about. It's just like
[1:01:04] Speaker 4: you're basking in this. Go, yeah, keep basking in this. Everything.
[1:01:10] Speaker 1: Stay consistent.
[1:01:11] Speaker 4: Ebb and flow. Yeah, everything is ebb and flow. But, yeah,
[1:01:16] Speaker 4: just trying to. trying to stay positive, trying to keep
[1:01:21] Speaker 4: your head above water.
[1:01:22] Speaker 3: I appreciate both of y'all vulnerabilities.
[1:01:23] Speaker 2: Yeah, that was amazing.
[1:01:26] Speaker 3: Sure, I think that's like important to make it hard.
[1:01:28] Speaker 2: It's so vulnerable.
[1:01:32] Speaker 3: That's a great thing. I mean, I think that that's
[1:01:34] Speaker 3: very important. Number one, especially amongst us as black people,
[1:01:38] Speaker 3: we're not always told to be vulnerable, that we should
[1:01:41] Speaker 3: be or that we can't. To be able to use
[1:01:43] Speaker 3: it within your art, obviously, it amplifies. I always, whenever
[1:01:47] Speaker 3: I listen to shit, I get like, not jealous, but like,
[1:01:50] Speaker 3: I listen to some shit and be like, man, this
[1:01:52] Speaker 3: person's killing it because they being more vulnerable than the
[1:01:54] Speaker 3: next nigga. Like having a pure conversation that way. So
[1:01:58] Speaker 3: I appreciate both of you.
[1:02:00] Speaker 5: I just want to say something real fast. This is
[1:02:04] Speaker 5: just something I recently discovered within my life.
[1:02:08] Speaker 1: And it's just kind of been like, it's really helping
[1:02:11] Speaker 1: me a lot. Because I think I became desensitized.
[1:02:21] Speaker 5: I've seen the most traumatic stuff on every scale, I
[1:02:25] Speaker 5: feel like. And I think a version of me started
[1:02:28] Speaker 5: to become numb to it. And instead of like feeling
[1:02:35] Speaker 5: those emotions, it literally, I don't know how I did it,
[1:02:40] Speaker 5: but I created a block. to where it's like, I
[1:02:43] Speaker 5: just don't really feel. And I was just like, just going.
[1:02:48] Speaker 5: And I think it became like, to the point to
[1:02:50] Speaker 5: where God highlighted that in my life.
[1:02:55] Speaker 1: And he said, you're human.
[1:02:59] Speaker 5: Like, you trained your mind.
[1:03:01] Speaker 1: To not be human. Like, be gentle, be soft, give
[1:03:05] Speaker 1: yourself grace.
[1:03:06] Speaker 5: And I kid you not, I've been like carving out
[1:03:09] Speaker 5: time to where whenever I'm feeling stuff, instead of me
[1:03:13] Speaker 5: just running from it or just trying to act like
[1:03:17] Speaker 5: it ain't there and just numb it, bro, I set
[1:03:22] Speaker 5: up time to just cry.
[1:03:23] Speaker 3: Yes.
[1:03:24] Speaker 4: I learned how to do that in therapy.
[1:03:27] Speaker 1: I sit in the shower.
[1:03:29] Speaker 3: You're a huge fan of this guy. This guy's great, man.
[1:03:33] Speaker 1: Bro, I sat in the shower.
[1:03:35] Speaker 4: No, especially as a man.
[1:03:37] Speaker 1: I got in the shower at 10.
[1:03:40] Speaker 5: And I got in the shower at 10 and I
[1:03:45] Speaker 5: was in prayer and he kind of like was guiding
[1:03:48] Speaker 5: me and talking me through how to channel it. And
[1:03:52] Speaker 5: I literally had to like create the space for myself
[1:03:55] Speaker 5: and tell myself that it was okay to cry.
[1:03:57] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[1:03:58] Speaker 1: Like, and like a flashback happened.
[1:04:01] Speaker 5: Like, as soon as I told myself it was okay
[1:04:04] Speaker 5: to cry, I just heard all the times where when
[1:04:06] Speaker 5: I cried, I heard.
[1:04:08] Speaker 3: Like, Stop crying.
[1:04:09] Speaker 6: Stop crying.
[1:04:13] Speaker 4: It's funny, boys got it the worst growing up. But
[1:04:17] Speaker 4: we all did to a point. And something I learned
[1:04:20] Speaker 4: in therapy going through my last breakup was like, I
[1:04:23] Speaker 4: remember asking her, is it a matter of time? Is
[1:04:27] Speaker 4: it just a matter of time before I start to
[1:04:29] Speaker 4: feel better or do I need to do some work?
[1:04:31] Speaker 4: And she was like, honestly, you got to cry.
[1:04:33] Speaker 3: Yes.
[1:04:33] Speaker 4: She was like, a lot of people go through things
[1:04:37] Speaker 4: and they don't grieve. And 10 years later, something happened
[1:04:41] Speaker 4: that triggers them and they just fall apart.
[1:04:44] Speaker 6: And you're wondering what happened.
[1:04:44] Speaker 4: I count the tears, too.
[1:04:45] Speaker 1: Like, I count them.
[1:04:46] Speaker 5: Like, if I get two, three, four, and I pray
[1:04:49] Speaker 5: on them, I'm like, what do these numbers mean?
[1:04:51] Speaker 4: No, I count the minutes. Because I have clinical depression.
[1:04:54] Speaker 4: There have been times where I've been crying and I
[1:04:56] Speaker 4: don't know why, you know? That's where my depression stemmed from,
[1:05:01] Speaker 4: it was a serotonin issue, so I wasn't sad for
[1:05:04] Speaker 4: any reason. It was just my base level was lower
[1:05:09] Speaker 4: than normal. So even when I was happy, I'd be
[1:05:13] Speaker 4: at a regular person's content, you know? Which is why
[1:05:18] Speaker 4: as a kid, I was never able to feel like
[1:05:20] Speaker 4: truly excited or enthusiastic. My mom used to be like,
[1:05:23] Speaker 4: you are so unenthusiastic. Like, I'd be like, I'm crying inside,
[1:05:28] Speaker 4: you know what I'm saying? But my therapist one day, like, yeah,
[1:05:32] Speaker 4: in therapy, she was like, are you trying to hold
[1:05:34] Speaker 4: back tears? I was like, yeah, cause you know, this
[1:05:37] Speaker 4: shit is $ 250 an hour.
[1:05:39] Speaker 6: She was like, I'm tired.
[1:05:43] Speaker 4: She was like, you think you're going to be crying
[1:05:44] Speaker 4: all day? I was like, yes. Like, I don't think
[1:05:47] Speaker 4: it'll stop. She was like, I'll time it for you.
[1:05:51] Speaker 4: 10 minutes. 10 minutes. I had no tears left at
[1:05:56] Speaker 4: that moment. And I was like, oh.
[1:05:57] Speaker 1: That was so good.
[1:06:00] Speaker 4: Yeah. She was like, you don't feel like, it don't
[1:06:02] Speaker 4: feel kind of good to cry. I was like, I
[1:06:04] Speaker 4: guess I never really let it feel good.
[1:06:08] Speaker 3: Or you just, you have the correlation or you associate
[1:06:11] Speaker 3: it so much with the negativity.
[1:06:12] Speaker 4: Yeah.
[1:06:13] Speaker 3: That you're like, yeah, because I agree. I feel the
[1:06:15] Speaker 3: same way. It's a lot of times also these things
[1:06:17] Speaker 3: are tied to, you know, our parents are the best
[1:06:19] Speaker 3: they could.
[1:06:19] Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
[1:06:20] Speaker 3: Our parents don't have access.
[1:06:21] Speaker 4: They were told the same thing.
[1:06:23] Speaker 6: Yeah.
[1:06:23] Speaker 3: And you're dealing with kids who get thrown in classrooms
[1:06:26] Speaker 3: based on these different things instead of like teachers knowing
[1:06:29] Speaker 3: how to handle these things.
[1:06:31] Speaker 1: Yeah.
[1:06:31] Speaker 3: For me, I grew up probably not crying, too, but
[1:06:33] Speaker 3: in my therapy, I let her cry as well. Yeah.
[1:06:36] Speaker 4: Shout out to therapy. Shout out to crying, bro. Honestly, no.
[1:06:40] Speaker 4: I think especially as a man, I think it's really important.
[1:06:48] Speaker 2: It is.
[1:06:49] Speaker 3: And you connect with all this shit young, man, so
[1:06:51] Speaker 3: that's even more important and special.
[1:06:54] Speaker 7: Connected to yourself and to just the world, I think,
[1:06:58] Speaker 7: is amazing and important.
[1:06:59] Speaker 1: It's my job.
[1:07:00] Speaker 3: That's the life of my job. Just know you didn't cry,
[1:07:01] Speaker 3: so you could cry a lot.
[1:07:03] Speaker 6: For that.
[1:07:05] Speaker 3: You're going back to your serious view, baby.
[1:07:07] Speaker 7: I want to thank both you guys for being so
[1:07:10] Speaker 7: vulnerable and also being so present with us.
[1:07:13] Speaker 2: I feel like this is, like, a bit emotional.
[1:07:15] Speaker 7: I feel like I'm, like, we usually are, like, I mean,
[1:07:16] Speaker 7: we're laughing a bunch, but, like, I always say to
[1:07:20] Speaker 7: a lot of our guests, this perspective is so unique,
[1:07:22] Speaker 7: and it's the only thing that we all have as
[1:07:24] Speaker 7: human that is unique to us.
[1:07:25] Speaker 2: So your sharing perspective is so important to me.
[1:07:27] Speaker 4: Yeah, man.
[1:07:28] Speaker 2: To Steelo, to the rest of the people here, both
[1:07:30] Speaker 2: of you guys, so I just wanna say thank you.
[1:07:32] Speaker 1: And I think it's super important. But you don't look
[1:07:35] Speaker 1: no 32.
[1:07:36] Speaker 2: Thank you, my boy, listen!
[1:07:39] Speaker 3: I've been trying to tell, niggas, man.
[1:07:40] Speaker 4: I could pull off maybe like 22, 23.
[1:07:42] Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, man?
[1:07:44] Speaker 3: I thought you was gonna diss you after that.
[1:07:50] Speaker 2: Y'all gonna catch me a new high school musical, man.
[1:07:52] Speaker 4: Half of them were 32.
[1:07:55] Speaker 3: Yeah, for sure. Old school Disney style.
[1:07:59] Speaker 7: Thank you guys for watching The Shop.
[1:08:01] Speaker 2: We'll be here next Monday.
[1:08:02] Speaker 3: Yes, sir.
[1:08:03] Speaker 6: That was a good episode.
[1:08:05] Speaker 3: That was great.
[1:08:06] Speaker 1: I ain't even gonna lie.
[1:08:07] Speaker 3: Great time, though.

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