# Can Men Really Handle Rejection? | Ep. 116

An episode of [Menisms](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1608929536), 19 Feb 2026, 55 min.

Audio: https://anchor.fm/s/81693d28/podcast/play/115704850/https%3A%2F%2Fd3ctxlq1ktw2nl.cloudfront.net%2Fstaging%2F2026-1-18%2Fa33a0d7c-fa15-ab2d-7ced-47adbda3d3d1.mp3

Subscribe to our YouTube channel and watch the video pod on Thursdays here 👉 https://youtube.com/@MenismsPodcast Feel free to drop us a comment. Got questions, feedback or want to share your experiences? 👉 https://forms.gle/5WkUNhx1fzPbubpy7 Follow the guys: Isyomar: https://www.instagram.com/isyomar/ Murewa: https://x.com/olumurewa?t=OYgAtjTrJQLWUWG5YmyvLA&s=09

## Transcript

[0:00] Don't believe that the worst that you can say is no.
[0:01] Oh yeah. So much worse.
[0:03] I said no fun against you. Yeah.
[0:04] Oh my God, you. What's up guys?
[0:18] So recently we saw on Tech Talkers young lady called
[0:21] Mirabelle. She shared a story of how she
[0:24] was raped in her own home. And you know, subsequently we've
[0:29] also seen reports of Lagos based model friends and her friend
[0:35] also being assaulted. We've also seen a story of a
[0:38] woman talking about or alleging that her husband assaulted their
[0:44] four year old daughter. Guys, what's going on?
[0:48] All these stories are becoming a little too common.
[0:51] Rape and sexual assaults are not misunderstandings.
[0:54] They are not mistakes, they are violence.
[0:57] They are crimes, and they are cowardice.
[1:00] As men, we cannot stay silent and neutral.
[1:02] If you remain neutral, you are part of the problem.
[1:05] Silence protects predators. Accountability protects people.
[1:09] Being a man is not about dominance and control.
[1:12] It's about responsibility. It's about character.
[1:16] It's about creating a safe space for women and children.
[1:19] We pray that justice is served and we commit to building a
[1:22] community where this harm is no longer tolerated.
[1:26] No excuses, no enabling, no silence.
[1:33] What's up, guys? Welcome back to another episode
[1:35] of your favorite podcast, Medicines.
[1:38] My name is Murray. Welcome, Claire and.
[1:40] I'm Mr. Mark. I want to.
[1:41] And this is another week of medicines.
[1:42] So guys, before we get right in, vows day just went by.
[1:47] I hope you had a partner to enjoy with to be honest.
[1:49] Even if you didn't, I hope you had a good day.
[1:52] But how did you enjoy first? Of all I was going to ask you,
[1:54] how was FaceTime, you know? So guys, if next video you see
[1:59] this time, if you only see me presenting, I'm telling you now
[2:03] something has happened to him. Just know I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
[2:08] I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 10, No 10 now 10.
[2:12] Well, but to be fair, to be fair, that was the reality.
[2:15] It was actually pretty. It's not.
[2:17] It's not the first I've experienced.
[2:19] What people do on vows there now.
[2:22] Love showing, love sharing, love making love How?
[2:29] Okay, fair enough, fair enough. I can't even argue that one.
[2:33] My vows they do you get, but was actually actually I didn't There
[2:36] was no. There's no real plan per SE.
[2:40] Whatever, right? As industrial, it's just.
[2:42] But did you have like companionship?
[2:43] Did you like show someone it was?
[2:44] Cozy. I was cozy.
[2:45] OK, it's enough. It's enough for the we're.
[2:47] Gonna take cozy as cozy cozy. Cozy.
[2:50] I was just very cozy. Cool.
[2:53] Yeah, I mean my days plans are not anything.
[2:55] I mean, I couldn't do anything elaborate, of course, but 10
[3:00] again, guys, just remember 10. But yeah, I was still able to
[3:05] like, you know, OK, So what we actually plan to do, Yeah, I'm
[3:08] going to go all romantic on you people because fuck you guys.
[3:10] So what we actually did was we we had planned to each other
[3:14] that we're going to actually get gifts for each other regardless
[3:16] of whether we're going to see each other or not.
[3:18] And just like, you know, be on FaceTime, share whatever the
[3:21] gifts are and then like how special it is and stuff like
[3:24] that. And do like this.
[3:26] We call it AI call it a cyber dinner.
[3:28] You know, she gets food that I get food here.
[3:30] We just eat and chill. Just.
[3:32] You know, Oh yeah, I didn't expect anything more than that.
[3:35] Oh yeah, no, to be honest, and I'm somebody.
[3:36] Who FaceTime dinner vibes especially for you long distance
[3:40] people? Yeah.
[3:41] But I mean, at the same time, I would also still chip in that I
[3:45] think we're really, really missing the plots on Valentine's
[3:49] Day because I saw so many things, so many, so many
[3:52] stories, so many, so much competition.
[3:54] And I'm just like, come on, guys.
[3:56] So there's only something, there's only one video.
[3:59] So these vows seem kind of dry, 'cause, you know, normally
[4:02] there's always a pressure on. Yeah, actually you're right.
[4:04] But I see economy the. People really kill this?
[4:06] Yeah. But me, I saw one video that
[4:08] really killed me. Or some guy, I don't know if it
[4:11] was planned or whatever, but he shot the Internet shout out,
[4:13] yeah, some guy in some estates. There's there is a proposal, no
[4:17] OK, was there someone proposal one too?
[4:18] It was some guy in the estate. He came, He was standing at the
[4:22] gate with his flowers and stuff. So what that guy just came out
[4:24] for the balcony? Shouted.
[4:25] She came late track already next.
[4:33] Oh. My.
[4:34] God, I don't think it was real. Fake or novel, you better be
[4:40] fake or whoever is involved man. Damn, that's that's.
[4:43] Why? But honestly, I mean people they
[4:46] miss so see you know everybody or your girl title because about
[4:49] the especially you know the real boyfriend.
[4:51] And that's why I said that I feel like we're missing the
[4:53] plot. Like we'll see in the end, you
[4:57] guys should just spend Vowsley how you like.
[4:59] You know, I would always say that when a very consumerist
[5:03] world, everybody's just trying to feed into the almost bad
[5:06] days. I must buy that.
[5:07] Everybody feels like Val's day needs to be the day that's you
[5:09] show your partner how much you love.
[5:10] Them. Oh no.
[5:11] Everyday real relationships. So every other day is a deal of
[5:14] gifting anyway, any day I feel like it, like, you know what,
[5:16] it's been a while. I mean, just but hey, you know,
[5:19] don't ever fall into the pressures.
[5:20] What I would always say to my guys, you know, there's just no
[5:23] need for you to, you know, especially because it's the,
[5:26] it's the beginning of the year, right?
[5:29] And it's always very known concepts that this year is
[5:32] starting. Your finances are still just,
[5:34] you know, getting their solid ground.
[5:36] There's no need to not go and trick yourself just by month 2,
[5:39] you know, again, but be intentional as possible within
[5:42] your budget. Nobody's everybody.
[5:44] Wants to some some some babes said that if you're dating for
[5:48] four months, she she she doesn't have to get the guy anything.
[5:55] Nobody. Does the guy have to get her
[5:56] anything? Bro in the same breath I'm like.
[5:59] She's crazy, She's crazy. You know the person.
[6:03] She's crazy. You said it who before they come
[6:09] out of source, But hey, hey, you know, it's and this, this, this
[6:13] is exactly what I was talking about as well.
[6:15] You know, it's, there's just a lot of, there's a lot of
[6:17] pressure that will come stand your ground.
[6:21] If all you can do is 50K20K10K, do whatever you can do.
[6:25] Yep, Yep. Right.
[6:25] If the person you're doing it for does not appreciate you take
[6:27] your L and you move on. In fact, Speaking of that, we're
[6:30] going to get into that kind of topic today because, well, until
[6:34] then, before we even get into this topic, we have a bunch of
[6:38] things you want to do. But the first thing is, as
[6:42] usual, like you said, guys, this is not a political podcast,
[6:44] right? But we still are going to need
[6:46] to call a lot of things out. Guys, please just have a quick
[6:50] look at how your country, our country chooses or has budgeted
[6:55] for the 2027 elections. Just just have a look at this,
[7:02] OK? You've seen that literally no
[7:04] other comments. Just let that sink in that this
[7:06] is where the proposed tax that they're asking you to pay will
[7:11] keep going to and. That's his personal pocket.
[7:13] I just want to say shout out to Addisua from our eyes, because
[7:16] in case you guys don't know, Herman, you need to lock in
[7:19] because she's giving every single term they can hurry the
[7:22] inside the insurance and out where all your single taxola is
[7:25] being spent, what is being spent on what the money allocated is
[7:27] being used for. So I'll just advise every single
[7:30] person so that you know, just thinking how this money didn't
[7:33] know where it is going. Just even if just get down
[7:36] knowledge, it will help. I don't know where we need to
[7:38] help, but just at least know because it feels like a lot of a
[7:42] lot of us don't know and we're just freestyling this, this,
[7:45] this like freestyling is too much.
[7:47] I think now we need to get to the point where I beg move.
[7:49] Just lock in small because man, no fun.
[7:55] Again, troops have landed. Have boots.
[7:57] Around I saw that. That's what I'm going to say
[7:59] about that one, but boots are on ground.
[8:01] As I saw that earlier, you know, honestly, if someone asks me
[8:06] today where Nigeria is going in the next two to three years, I
[8:10] don't have a straight answer. Yeah, I don't have a straight
[8:12] answer. But again, guys, we're not a
[8:14] posical podcast, right? So, but we will call things out,
[8:16] things that we don't believe should be, you know, the normal
[8:19] because again, they're not normal.
[8:21] So we're going to call it out. But it.
[8:24] Was the Lagos Marathon. Yeah, the Lagos Marathon was so
[8:28] I wasn't there personally, but of course I followed through
[8:30] with all. Of them see let's make it back
[8:32] more on the next one. Is it the same year?
[8:34] No. I think it's once a year.
[8:37] OK, thank God I know I said that anymore.
[8:42] I don't know if I'm ready to do that this year.
[8:45] I have no words. I can't.
[8:46] No word. Because I've seen so many people
[8:48] have now gotten up. I like it.
[8:50] It's really good, man. You all fit, fun, do a healthy
[8:52] lifestyle. Yeah, man.
[8:53] But. But on that same hand, please is
[8:56] one thing to to like do you see the guy that got run over by the
[8:59] ambulance? Oh no, I didn't see that.
[9:02] Brah, imagine you wake up in the morning, yours your ready feet
[9:06] farm so you want to run over by. The.
[9:08] Ambulance, ambulance. The thing is that at the end of
[9:09] the day when I saw the video, the ambulance driver is can't be
[9:12] to blame Bros. I don't wait for the guy.
[9:16] He fell at the wrongest place. The guy who did?
[9:19] Yeah, the person I fell in front of the ambulance.
[9:21] Ambulance was actually just there on that.
[9:25] No rule for ground. Don't climb.
[9:28] I don't know if he back like but he said first leg on 1st climb
[9:31] on fully brah. In his defense, all he got to do
[9:35] is just get up and get in. It's inappropriate to laugh,
[9:42] guys. Somebody got injured.
[9:44] Yeah, man, Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
[9:46] Hope you get well soon man. It's not something serious or.
[9:48] Life threatening but actually situational awareness?
[9:51] Yes. No, come on.
[9:52] No, no, that was a mistake. Is tumbled.
[9:53] It was too close when he fell there climbing, but you just get
[9:56] up, you get in the car. So but what?
[9:58] Did he actually do like the ambulance?
[10:00] I don't know. Did we just stop there?
[10:01] I'm just saying, OK, defense, you know?
[10:04] Because really, I mean, there's one thing.
[10:05] To help really jam you for nothing for for boss ambulance
[10:09] we have a better survival rates. Like you said.
[10:12] So yeah, depending on let them do that.
[10:14] But what I did see about the the marathon though, is that
[10:18] apparently just like previously, organization, organization
[10:23] problems. Is that?
[10:24] People how we just get things right in this country.
[10:26] People who are who are not going to die.
[10:28] It's not the marathon I did to kill them.
[10:31] Is the medal solution. Get medal I don't like.
[10:34] Can we just get something right? I saw one of my guys on his IG
[10:36] posts. Bro had finished his wrong 10K
[10:40] meters everything everything with his looking all those
[10:42] wickedest. Glasses.
[10:43] Yeah, yeah, the running glasses, yes.
[10:45] Water glasses were everything and he tried to get his medal.
[10:48] He lost his shoes. He lost his glasses.
[10:51] He has wrong. Thank you.
[10:51] He didn't go back home with shoes.
[10:54] Oh my. God on glasses and not him not
[10:55] going back home with shoes so that they don't break his leg.
[10:57] He had to, it's like. And this is honestly, no, it's
[11:01] not really a government thing. This is just come on Nigerians.
[11:03] The Nigerian thing, like Nigerians, you're gonna come.
[11:06] On man, like, come on, we don't get you.
[11:08] There's no, there's no. It's a medal.
[11:10] You. You know, do you know what that
[11:12] stuff reminded me of? Very well.
[11:13] Do you remember that? That cake something?
[11:17] I don't know what event was that?
[11:21] Yeah, everybody brings cakes. The.
[11:22] Cakes. It was one of the most
[11:24] embarrassing things I've ever witnessed.
[11:26] There's no. Difference between that and the
[11:27] medal? Because no difference.
[11:29] I saw that kid video in so many everywhere.
[11:31] So everybody's on. Just come take his school taste
[11:35] here. I didn't.
[11:39] I didn't know where to categorize what I was looking at
[11:43] people were fighting for. I don't bro.
[11:46] I mean fighting for kick. That is, if you you if you
[11:51] mistakenly brought kick that oh, I'm here.
[11:56] To before you. So it's the same.
[11:59] It's it's not organization thing.
[12:01] I don't know what. Nigerians, Nigerians, we as
[12:03] Nigerians have a lot of work to do, man.
[12:04] Like we keep blaming our government.
[12:06] We have a lot of work to do, and I think there just needs to be
[12:09] something we haven't quite figured out what's wrong.
[12:11] With the grassroots, I don't know, you need to fix something.
[12:13] Let's do something. Let's try.
[12:15] Yeah. Anyways, guys, it's it's we need
[12:18] to just do better as Nigerians. I think that's all we can see.
[12:21] Well, moving on to other things we have a game to play this week
[12:27] and apparently this one is a riddles game.
[12:32] Got a big You want to embarrass me and my family?
[12:34] I. Mean, just call me the Riddler.
[12:36] I mean, all right, you're good. So this first one, so there are
[12:43] two riddles they've given us and the first one says I have keys
[12:47] but open, no locks. I have space but no room.
[12:52] You can enter but you can't go out.
[12:54] What am I? He shocked.
[12:57] You happy? I'm holding my lips because I
[13:01] don't almost talk nonsense now, OK?
[13:06] You have keys, Let me let me go one more time.
[13:07] So it says I have keys but open no locks.
[13:11] Alicia. I have I'm.
[13:12] Dead country. Country I have.
[13:14] Space, but no room. You can enter, but you can't go
[13:20] outside. Now joke already called me.
[13:34] I made a mistake, I made a mistake.
[13:42] I'm sorry I don't have keys, but I have no room.
[13:47] But I don't put anything speech. Space but no room.
[13:51] But you can enter, but you can't leave.
[13:53] Can enter but you can't leave. I have no idea what this is.
[13:57] I tap out. So I'm it it sounds to me like
[13:59] it's something, it seems like either a treasure chest, the
[14:02] box. It's something that you can
[14:05] wait. You just no, I'm just just like
[14:08] you. I'm in the wind as well.
[14:09] They've only given us. OK, OK.
[14:14] OK. You know what?
[14:16] Actually, let's know in the audience.
[14:18] Let's see if you guys can guess what exactly.
[14:20] Tell us a comment section. Let's see if you guys can guess
[14:22] what this is. But today I'll move to the next
[14:24] one. Next one is the more of me you
[14:27] have, the less you see what are my?
[14:31] Onions, the more of me you have, as you did slide onions, the
[14:42] less you see. Oh my God.
[14:55] OK, you know, let me, let me, the more of me say it again, the
[14:58] more of me you have. The the more of me, the more of
[15:00] me you have, the less you see what am I?
[15:03] I'm horrible at riddles. Anyway, the more of me you have,
[15:05] the less you see. Nobody, Shakespeare don't.
[15:08] Worry. No, no, it's a hot dog.
[15:10] The more you're having it, the less you're going to see it.
[15:13] It's going to be gone. All right, You know what?
[15:18] I'll reveal this. Answer now, serious joker.
[15:20] I'll give the answer next time. You guys give me the answer on
[15:22] this one too. Yeah, let's know what you're
[15:24] going on. I don't waste time here.
[15:25] So anyways, guys, even talking about this entire situation, the
[15:30] discussion we're having today is actually about rejection.
[15:33] So what we're going to talk about today actually is how do
[15:38] you feel about being rejected? So there's several ways.
[15:41] There's several ways that men get rejected, and I think we're
[15:44] trying to talk today about just the different ways, how we take
[15:46] it, what kind of reactions we have, you know, what's our
[15:49] remedy to the kind of rejections we have.
[15:51] So I think we can start off with the very common one, which is
[15:54] like rejection from women, you know?
[15:56] I think almost I, I let not speak for guys in general, I
[16:00] feel like we have been trained for rejection to an extent right
[16:07] from the right from the start, right from the start because as
[16:10] guys, I'm talking as guys like do you know how many I want to
[16:14] go to prom or date? Or do you know how many nose
[16:17] how? Many nose.
[16:19] No, no, no. And and what kills me is is
[16:25] don't believe that the worst that you can say is no.
[16:27] Oh, yeah, So much worse. I say it's often against you.
[16:30] Yeah. Oh, my God.
[16:30] Oh, my God. Let's.
[16:35] Pause. Let's pause.
[16:37] Have you? Have you?
[16:37] Have you had an I'll moment? They don't burn anybody who they
[16:40] want. You how I'm not saying I've seen
[16:44] some things I mean I've not had personally and you movements.
[16:48] I've had a so I look you. Know, I think.
[16:53] But you know you is far, I think in.
[16:54] High school, yeah. So like you just said, maybe
[16:59] mine was not like direct you, but it was definitely.
[17:03] Like a. Yeah, like, oh, is this the one?
[17:05] Like, and that was like high school tech, you know?
[17:07] You know what you know. What like is this the present?
[17:09] You know, you're really right because there's a lot of
[17:11] character development that comes from the amount of no's that you
[17:13] get, especially the ones that are unprecedented.
[17:15] Like there's some no's that you're even like.
[17:20] But but you say you like me back.
[17:21] OK, For example, I I remember there was this person I like
[17:24] back in high school then. And even people in the class
[17:29] could see that She also like like everybody can see it's
[17:32] that. But then, you know, when you're
[17:34] guys, you know, you know, you're not even just the guys, but
[17:37] everybody around you just pressures you to ask out, ask
[17:39] out, ask out. And then that was sort of
[17:42] supposed to be the next stage after you kind of like each
[17:44] other. And so, you know, I muscled up
[17:47] the courage and then I asked her out.
[17:53] The no was let me just see, for lack of a better expression,
[17:59] public because every you don't get it.
[18:04] You know what's today in 2 minutes the next house is like,
[18:06] Oh, I heard that that's. What I'm saying that time you
[18:08] couldn't you couldn't get in no, a rejection that time and nobody
[18:10] would know. Everybody would know about it.
[18:12] This guy been trying to come out with these.
[18:15] Babe, she's she's the arm. She's back there when they
[18:19] reject you. I've forgotten it.
[18:20] Yeah, one, now there's. Another one Allah.
[18:23] Allah, there was a loud. In a loud that's remember those
[18:27] you're the they'll come out of one.
[18:29] And, and, and, you know, at this point you have to battle between
[18:35] being a guy because they tell you what you want to cry.
[18:39] Do you know that? Somebody told me you'd know one
[18:41] time and the person followed up with, OK, there's another.
[18:46] I've said no, do you want to cry?
[18:48] So there was this one time that I, I got a note from someone and
[18:51] she followed up with, So now that I've said no, you're going
[18:54] to cry. Now that that triggers some
[18:59] confusion in my, in my reaction, because rather than cry, I
[19:03] became angry. I actually wanted to like, I'm
[19:04] like. Don't want to disrespect.
[19:06] I'm like, there's no more noise, you know, send me again is now.
[19:08] Is now like. Add insults to injury you get.
[19:12] And so I think at that point I was like, I just walked away.
[19:15] And I was very happy with that decision, by the way, because my
[19:18] silence was more painful to her than whatever reaction she was
[19:22] hoping to get. But deep inside me, I was
[19:24] broken. I was hurt.
[19:25] I was like, hey, you don't reach like that's now.
[19:28] There's no, if you don't, you don't like me back to the point
[19:31] of one day, you can just say, oh, sorry, no, I'm not
[19:33] interested. It doesn't cost that much.
[19:35] But I think that I think like you mentioned, rejection has
[19:38] really is something that as you as you grow as a guy, they just.
[19:41] Yeah, the ability you. The ability, especially when it
[19:43] comes to the female part or yeah, some people might not
[19:46] experience that aspect like like you said, there are.
[19:48] Different. There are different ways to be
[19:49] rejected. Or just became slightly on the
[19:51] when girls reject you, like right now, should I call it
[19:56] immune? It's like, no, I, no, no, no,
[20:00] where we live now, we don't, we do like except for those who are
[20:03] like. Or whatever, one person, every
[20:07] other guy now, like probably let us say me that I'm single.
[20:08] If I got attracted to somebody and I speak to this person, the
[20:13] person does not respond. D1D2D3.
[20:15] You move on, whoop, you move on. Talk to whoever I feel is newly
[20:19] attractive now, which is as easy so it's not before we tell them
[20:23] no. Oh my God, that weak.
[20:25] You're sad, you're thinking you're, you're reasoning one or
[20:27] two these words. Things.
[20:29] Man, now it's like, no, I, I cool, what's next?
[20:33] You get then another aspect of new again is when you get new
[20:37] from work, when you're trying to when you get rejection from a
[20:41] job, from a career path, from from something that you want to
[20:44] use to make money, because that's another thing you see
[20:47] down new now that's new. That can easily put you in
[20:51] depression easily if you don't take time because imagine you're
[20:55] working and grinding to all this whole aspect because it means
[20:58] OK, speak. I'm going too far safe.
[21:01] No, we're going too far. I'm talking about last week now
[21:04] actually. Actually, in fact, now that
[21:07] we're on that, how how would you say you took it?
[21:09] Because. Oh no, Now like I told you that
[21:11] time now, now I'm better at like rejection.
[21:15] I'm not news. Yeah, even let's not even say if
[21:18] you even this part of like in this acting.
[21:21] Yeah. If I go to if I go to show my
[21:23] face on the first screen. No, I've had news.
[21:26] Especially as an actor, you go collect new audition, you go
[21:28] collect news. So I've had so many I've my
[21:31] minds have have, I mean, I'm gonna call it immune, but I've
[21:35] built my mind frame to it now whereby when I hear no, it's
[21:38] like, aye, cool, moving on. What's next you get?
[21:41] Because let's be frank, if it was too good to affect me as it
[21:44] would have, let me just say like when I first started or like
[21:47] earlier, earlier in my years or whatever.
[21:50] Right now you think I'll be calmly just me and you'll be
[21:52] having this conversation. I know for the next two weeks
[21:54] I'll be sucking and still worrying and still wallowing and
[21:56] still thinking, oh, my God, I would have had this.
[21:58] It should have been this. It should have been.
[22:01] But like, now you get know you, you go to all the best.
[22:04] Move forward, OK. Take your one or two hours,
[22:08] maybe get pissed off. You must be you're human being.
[22:11] You must react. As far as I'm concerned, you
[22:13] react to whatever, to rejection. Everybody reacts just like that.
[22:16] Yeah. Now we're going to.
[22:17] We wanted to enter university. Whack Jam.
[22:23] Who do? All of you.
[22:24] If you're watching me now, you know, like a few of us.
[22:30] Only a few of you are smart enough to enter.
[22:44] Let's be frank. You know, you know this thing,
[22:49] you know this thing you're talking about.
[22:50] Now, this is the, I think one of my biggest rejections that that
[22:55] really broke me. But so, OK, so first of all,
[22:59] I've never had any rejection where I had to cry about it, but
[23:04] I've had rejections where I tried to do what is next or more
[23:09] now what my brain just couldn't shut down.
[23:11] So this was, I think it was in 20/20/13 as I apply for my
[23:17] master's degree. Applies to a couple of schools,
[23:20] got a lot of rejections on some schools.
[23:23] That's the person you just test it because you're like, OK, fair
[23:25] enough, right I. Just said master's now just let
[23:28] me just say this some new things.
[23:30] SO111 school had already given me, in fact, 2 schools are
[23:35] giving me admission, right. And out of the two schools, one
[23:41] of the schools sending the So they send you like a cast
[23:45] number, the number you're meant to use to apply for the visa and
[23:47] everything. They were sending their number
[23:49] too late. So if at the point where they
[23:52] were going to send their number, by the time I put my application
[23:54] for the visa and everything school but the other school was
[23:58] sending it at the right time. They had in fact, they had sent
[24:01] their time ago. So, so I was just like, you know
[24:03] what, I'm just going to go to the school and just apply.
[24:06] Just get this message over with and done.
[24:10] Yeah, and everything is set. I've ever started economic
[24:13] school around sorting out accommodation, you know, all the
[24:15] little things I need to start doing before school really
[24:17] resumes. Everything was in place.
[24:20] It was just for me to get my visa, book my tickets and go for
[24:25] my master's. OK.
[24:28] And this was in the UK, by the way, after US had rejected me
[24:31] several times from several schools.
[24:34] And so I, it was not time to pick up my visa, went to the
[24:38] visa office, picked up the document that they give to you.
[24:41] Now for anyone who's ever like applied for visas, you would
[24:46] also, you would know that pressure of opening that folder
[24:51] because your passport is sealed in there.
[24:53] So they don't tell you whether it's been granted.
[24:55] It's not like the US one that right there and then they would
[24:57] reject you. So you know right there and then
[24:59] that they're not giving it to you.
[25:00] For the UK one, they would let him marinate.
[25:03] They give you the, the, the, the, the, the glimpse of hope.
[25:08] Because just tell you, Oh yeah, here's your process.
[25:10] You don't know whether it's approved or not.
[25:13] Just for me to open up the documents.
[25:15] And all I just saw was there's a little letter that they will add
[25:20] to your passport to say, unfortunately, I just said I was
[25:23] like, now in the moment where I open the documents, I hadn't
[25:31] felt the rejection. When I go back home, I sat down
[25:34] and I read the letter again. You know, and you know, in this
[25:37] stage of your, in this stage of your application, anytime you
[25:41] open your computer, tab, tab, tab, tab, tab, different
[25:45] application form different, you know, there are just so many
[25:46] things open because, bro, there's just a lot of shit going
[25:49] on. My parents just asked me to
[25:53] offer. They rejected me.
[25:55] I didn't get the visa. They're like, oh, wow.
[26:00] Meanwhile, this was the pathway I had already.
[26:03] I was working. I was working at a job.
[26:06] I resigned because I was like, yeah, I'm giving my masters,
[26:10] giving them like enough notice. You know, I'll still pop in
[26:12] every now and then even. But I told them I'm already
[26:14] going off, told all my peers that, yeah, you know, there's no
[26:19] need to even for me to start this.
[26:20] I'm leaving the country. I don't give.
[26:22] A goodbye. I had already packed up,
[26:25] everything was set good to go and I was also supposed to be
[26:28] going for masters with so my peers.
[26:33] So we already even started arranging like accommodation
[26:35] together. You get like, you know, when you
[26:37] get there, let me know what are the everything was dawning on me
[26:42] at the same time. And I think it's not even just
[26:46] the media rejection, it's the questions that remind you of the
[26:49] rejection that are more painful because they're like, so how far
[26:52] was going on with your masters? Now you're not going anymore.
[26:56] Now see, Speaking of what you just said, that's another
[26:58] rejection that is bad. You have visa application
[27:01] rejection. I have visa rejection.
[27:03] But it's extremely bad. It's extremely.
[27:06] Bad. That's how I'm going to get to
[27:07] Yankee bro you. So I haven't got what do you
[27:10] call it? Invitation from the embassy.
[27:12] You know, invitation. I don't know who it is we can't
[27:21] get. We're just different of that
[27:23] stuff. Oh my God, man, she was just
[27:28] burning. Just on a very straight face.
[27:31] No, we tried to laugh at any of my cracks.
[27:34] Oh boy, in a hat somewhere. Maybe the exit 1 looks like you.
[27:39] Just give my reject. I felt that one.
[27:45] You know what I was meant to be, you know, say I was just going
[27:48] to go for just one trip. I just want someone just said
[27:50] guy go from home for this part. Room.
[27:52] Yeah, I must be one of those, one of those trips.
[27:54] One of those trips for the books.
[27:55] Yeah, that after that, I don't need to be there.
[27:57] There's no need to be there. Just just for that moment, bro.
[28:00] Damn. So that rejection to down the
[28:02] Pino. You know this I had I had a
[28:04] visual rejection recently. If I before we had private talk
[28:07] about that, I think because no of these rejections, we haven't
[28:10] spoken about how we really reacted to it.
[28:12] I'll say that for that rejection I got for my master's, I
[28:15] definitely, I was locked off for like a week and a half.
[28:17] I didn't want to speak to anybody.
[28:18] Do you want to hear from anybody?
[28:20] I didn't want like I wasn't interested in.
[28:22] And you see, I think it's more, it's a very ironic thing to say.
[28:30] I think it's more difficult to go through rejection when you
[28:36] have a partner, like when you have somebody you're in love
[28:38] with, because you still have to talk to your partner.
[28:42] Yeah, I don't want to. And you're not allowed to be in
[28:45] that mood too long because now you're affecting their own mood.
[28:50] But while I was going through this, I was single.
[28:52] So I expressed the peace of being as as vexed as long as
[28:58] possible. And I think by the time I came
[29:01] out of that, I was just able to now say, OK, OK, it's done.
[29:05] It's done. How do I move on now in all of
[29:08] this, there's no room for tears don't form.
[29:11] I don't know how to explain it, but tears don't form from
[29:13] rejection like this. It's more anger.
[29:15] It's more there's just there's this built of frustration.
[29:17] Pain is not like. Tears.
[29:19] It's not necessarily a cherry thing.
[29:21] Tears No, don't get. From rejection.
[29:23] Yeah, yeah, it doesn't even. Form from something painful that
[29:25] happened, emotional things. You see rejection now.
[29:28] I don't think that would make me cry.
[29:30] At all. In fact, to me, I will be.
[29:32] If I feel like I want to cry, I'll be angrier.
[29:35] Yeah. Because I'm like.
[29:35] What was more of a Vex type thing?
[29:37] Man not solving any problem. And you're right, man, I think
[29:39] before I used to get really, really angry you get, because
[29:42] why the fuck isn't on me? Why the fuck are you telling me
[29:44] no? Like why in shorts?
[29:45] Why the fuck in? General, you won't be thinking
[29:46] that everybody else already has Ibiza.
[29:48] Like no, no, everything is in general.
[29:50] Like when you get rejected in general.
[29:52] Why me at a temple? So I was just I was just start
[29:54] fuming. Well, you know, like you said,
[29:57] now, when you keep on getting it, getting it, getting,
[29:58] getting, getting, then realize that you want to vex every
[30:00] single time. Yeah, you will.
[30:02] You will. Because especially, especially
[30:05] when I started first like the first, my first two years of
[30:08] doing auditions, when I said, OK, you know what, let me like
[30:12] the first two years of doing auditions.
[30:15] You know what? Actually talk more about that.
[30:16] Talk more about that because I feel like the kind of rejections
[30:19] you get. The thing is that when I look
[30:20] back at it, I'll say I, I, I should, I blame myself.
[30:23] I'll put my, put some blame on myself onto the aspect tab.
[30:26] I still don't rape myself. I don't, I'm, I'll still say
[30:28] till now I'm not, I'm not good at auditions.
[30:32] Like when I say auditions, like when they set up like a room,
[30:35] then they say. You have to keep on the sport
[30:36] on. The sport that moment boom.
[30:39] Tell me to give this character yeah, I can never give you my
[30:42] best in that moment. I'm sorry that's just me.
[30:44] I don't know of any other people people the thespians shout out
[30:47] to y'all but me. I can never give you my best at
[30:49] that moment. That's why right now and I like
[30:51] when they say oh, setting the tip of your this thing.
[30:54] I don't set camera. I don't adjust no key.
[30:56] Take one, take two, take three watch and back.
[30:59] OK, I've done this now then I'm not sending the best of which I
[31:03] think this is my ability. Then it's not left for you to
[31:05] judge on that now. And now if you tell me no, I'm
[31:07] sorry I couldn't give you more. But when I come for like
[31:10] auditions and then and there is what I'm getting injected.
[31:12] Thank you. We'll see you again.
[31:13] Ah, man, it pisses me off so much because it's like why, why,
[31:17] why, why, why like I know I can't do better than this or
[31:20] something like that or like you even allow me like I've done
[31:24] this thing. So I I after those first two
[31:28] years bro. You know, this thing you're
[31:30] saying is a very interesting take on how men take reject
[31:34] because for one, as a guy, you're, you're really, really
[31:38] judged by the capabilities, like you are judged by the things you
[31:41] can do because to them to to society, that is how you are
[31:45] contributing. So that's why you always see
[31:47] that guys are always trying to have something they're doing.
[31:50] You just you, you find a guy who's just not doing anything.
[31:53] Like how Like you're not just doing anything.
[31:56] Then it's not a question of how well are you doing that thing
[31:59] you say you can do? That's not the second part.
[32:01] So when you get rejected, your body feels like they've told it
[32:04] to. Your feels that thing you think.
[32:05] You can do it. You're shit at it.
[32:07] Bro, I won't lie to you man. That's the same way I was
[32:09] feeling man, because I'll just come.
[32:13] Once I get into that thing, my nerves start getting the best of
[32:15] me and I have it in my you know how many things I went for?
[32:17] Isn't I did all that shit like 4 life went there.
[32:23] We did trust me, we did on this ground we did all these peas.
[32:28] So like after like 2 years, I did originally two years where I
[32:31] didn't get any any freaking like I didn't get anything I could
[32:34] say at the end of the day me said if I see myself that time I
[32:37] would go select myself because I know that was not.
[32:40] Then I realized that oh bro this thing is not your fault.
[32:42] When I do tips and I said anything I will get better
[32:45] feedback and stuff. The first rule I finally got was
[32:48] just a wolf self. It wasn't even based on I see
[32:50] you know what I was meant to be some it wasn't based on like
[32:53] merry past. It was just right place right
[32:55] time. I made the right move.
[32:57] Boom. The lady thought I was someone
[32:59] that her husband sent to come and talk to her.
[33:01] I was not. I just saw up with the person
[33:04] that went to meet her because her friend already told her oh
[33:06] one of my guys coming through check him out.
[33:09] That's her friend. That's the person I knew.
[33:10] Husband told her oh one of my people is coming through, check
[33:12] him out. But me now I'm the person I went
[33:13] to speak and I'm me open mouth. That's how I got that role.
[33:16] Everything. That's how my whole this thing,
[33:18] that's where it kicked off like fully.
[33:20] But I did that one after I doing that one, I shoot you know, for
[33:22] like a year or almost 2 years, I didn't do any other thing again.
[33:24] I was not, I was just that's when I went to get a camera and
[33:27] I was like, you know what, Since nobody wants to put me on this
[33:29] thing, I gotta buy my camera and put myself.
[33:31] That's why I started doing my whole content and you know, I
[33:32] started putting my camera, landing video graph and
[33:35] everything. So at the same time it was true
[33:36] because of rejection you get like no, no, no, no, no.
[33:39] OK, you know what, fuck this, what are these people do?
[33:43] It's not the same camera up arrow.
[33:44] I'm getting my cameras learnt how to do the whole parrow, the
[33:46] drone and now we need to do all again.
[33:48] I can't be then Fast forward later is now now that I'm now
[33:51] doing the acting thing properly. So rejection too helps in the I
[33:55] would say it helps, but like it's it's like you said, beauty,
[33:57] character and stuff. So that time I used to be very,
[33:59] very vexed, like I've like well, like what the fuck, Why, why,
[34:02] why not? Why not do that?
[34:04] Well, I think when it happened over time, over time, I lost
[34:07] some some feedbacks from some people that you know me say
[34:11] apply to some emojis. These are good.
[34:14] Proceed to give me some advice and stuff.
[34:15] So and I'll learn to come because I have a very hot temper
[34:18] and I'll learn to just breathe, calm down.
[34:22] And even this last one said that I said I got it would have
[34:25] almost still been work because before excluding my person, I
[34:29] was in there called me and said you this is about to go down.
[34:32] This is what they're saying. No, right.
[34:34] So let me just tell you before they call you and tell you.
[34:36] So it's not like a shock. So that already absorbed,
[34:39] already absorbed that whole blue, I was in the right frame
[34:43] of mind. I already knew that's what they
[34:45] were calling me for. So it wasn't like, because
[34:46] imagine if I didn't know if you didn't give.
[34:48] Me that you've been making plans already.
[34:49] If imagine if you didn't give me that update, then they're just
[34:51] calling me. I'm not really and now tell me
[34:53] that I feel sorry for the for the person for I saw man, yes
[34:56] man reflex. I feel just like what the fuck
[34:58] do you mean? I don't know where I would go.
[34:59] He just gave me. I say more.
[35:00] I'm not telling you. So that.
[35:02] Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that helped, too.
[35:04] So rejection, man, no matter how much you see it.
[35:06] You when you let me tell you no. That's the thing about people
[35:09] again. We don't, we seem to know people
[35:12] don't. People don't.
[35:14] How do you want to put this down?
[35:15] People don't like hearing the word no, you know.
[35:18] That's fact. That's.
[35:19] Like a lot of the times, like, because we're so used to, we
[35:22] think everything is just like when someone says no, it's like,
[35:25] like, what do you mean? Like, no, My God, no.
[35:27] I mean, I mean, I wanna lie to you these days.
[35:30] I take it upon myself. I do it on purpose.
[35:32] Like, no, maybe the slightest thing.
[35:34] I'll just tell you no. You need to get used to no,
[35:37] because we, we have that badminton, I swear.
[35:39] No, you absolutely tell me no. You can do something like this
[35:41] if you hear me. If you use 1K get me this thing.
[35:44] No, I can't actually. Sorry.
[35:46] But you know, I know. You laugh it off.
[35:48] I'm like, no, I'm. Serious.
[35:49] I'm not going to. *** no. Like I'm saying no, like we
[35:54] don't, we don't miss a bad thing to wear.
[35:57] I'll ask my guy this. Like this thing like no, no, no,
[36:01] no. He's just, you know, I mean,
[36:05] you're absolutely right because I give an example now, if I ask
[36:07] somebody, do you like my shirts? You know, unconsciously my I'm
[36:12] expecting like, Oh yeah, it's nice.
[36:14] But the person tells me not really, I'll feel it in the
[36:20] depths of me. Now, it might not be that much.
[36:22] That is fantastic, right? But like you just said, human
[36:25] beings have this programming where something that something
[36:29] that seems objectively like a yes.
[36:33] When you just ask for reconfirmation, you expect that
[36:35] yes to resonate. Then when the person that says
[36:37] actually no, it throws you off balance, it throws you to a
[36:41] place. Where?
[36:41] Let me, let me get a seat. No.
[36:42] Like no. No, like I'm like, you're not
[36:45] you're. Not having a sip of this it's.
[36:49] Not like we need to understand that there's actually an answer
[36:51] called no. No, you.
[36:53] Take no, you take no. It's actually a very interesting
[36:55] take because you know, if if we actually were so OK, that's
[37:00] right. That's the the rejections I've
[37:01] had to face. I've actually faced some very
[37:05] weird rejections and I feel like there's certain there are levels
[37:08] to the the way rejection is even being presented to you.
[37:11] You have the rejection that you can see too, that the reason
[37:14] they rejected this because you are not qualified.
[37:17] Like you've seen it and you're like, ah, and it hurts you
[37:20] because you know that if they give you like chance to, I'll
[37:25] correct a few things and I guess I can come back stronger.
[37:27] Like give me a second. I just didn't know this is what
[37:29] you guys were looking for. And there's the one where you've
[37:33] overdone. That's the one.
[37:35] I actually, that's what I can't wrap it around.
[37:36] And they're like, yeah, we like your stuff, but I feel like it's
[37:40] we can't, we can't, we can't afford it.
[37:45] But I didn't tell you I came here for bigger.
[37:48] I mean, I know what your pay was good.
[37:50] The potential pay is. And I'm here for the job like
[37:53] just, I'm putting my best of all so that I can be the best.
[37:56] Candidates. Not sure you're too much.
[37:58] We don't think we can afford them, right?
[38:01] That one throws me in a limbo because I might, I might.
[38:04] I mean, it's like a compliment, like a back at the.
[38:07] Compliment. It's like, hey man, yeah, you're
[38:09] too good. Yeah, you're too good.
[38:10] It's a good man. So I'm here like thank you, this
[38:14] is a thank you moment. Is this like a because now
[38:19] you've told me I overqualified for the for the job or for the
[38:23] whatever you want me to do and so.
[38:25] That's why I'm rejected. So, like, should I do myself?
[38:30] Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't even know what I should
[38:32] be angry. I don't know what I there's
[38:34] just, there's so much going on in that moment.
[38:36] And so yeah, there's and I think this is where it's peculiar for
[38:41] guys. We have nowhere to channel that.
[38:44] Even if you say you want to talk to your guy about it, the best
[38:46] your guy can say is I'm or just let you know what he's did.
[38:50] We don't really. Express that much?
[38:51] Like and because you don't have a bunch of choice, I.
[38:53] Think all of us in this country. We need to actually you need to
[38:55] have like mouth, but. You took it out my mouth.
[38:57] I was literally about, I want to use what therapy?
[38:59] I want to say everybody should see shrink.
[39:01] We need to have like there's so many unresolved things that so
[39:05] many unresolved. People are just leaving with so
[39:07] many bottled up stuff that. So many things, so many things.
[39:12] You know those, you know what I you know what I started doing, I
[39:16] talked to my youngest brother, he lost, you know, you know, you
[39:18] know what I did. I started doing this because I
[39:21] got also understand that rejection actually changes your
[39:25] trajectory. Like, you know how we say
[39:27] rejection is character building, but some people actually,
[39:29] because they get rejected a lot, become angrier They they
[39:33] actually, or like, you know who were able to control your anger?
[39:36] Yeah, because some people actually lose control of their
[39:38] anger. They will get lost in the
[39:39] source. So I call my brother sometimes
[39:41] and I just say, alpha, I was going, what's going on with the
[39:42] girls in your life? You know why I do this?
[39:44] I do this because I want to keep it in check that he's not
[39:47] feeling like less of a human being because some bees are
[39:48] rejecting him because that happens to many.
[39:50] You see, you can be thriving in and unfortunately, this is how
[39:54] life works. Life won't give you everything.
[39:56] You can be defined as Gabby or not.
[39:57] You can be the toilet Gabby. You don't have sports skills.
[39:59] You can't be the most sports. You know, life will just have
[40:01] something. You can't have it all right.
[40:02] Chris Brown. So unfortunately, and now with
[40:09] the with the express I have had with life, I feel like I don't
[40:13] know how to watch him fall into some of those traps that I
[40:16] didn't really get like any full guidance on because I see how
[40:19] you can excel at school. But because a babe in school
[40:23] says she doesn't want you you. Feel now start.
[40:26] Feeling what your grades going low, what you see and.
[40:29] That's been there. Been there, not just been there,
[40:32] done that. So, so and I started doing this.
[40:37] I started like, you know, in the little way I can just start
[40:41] hearing my brothers out, you know, so you can just tell me,
[40:43] tell me so that I can tell you that.
[40:45] I tried to die with them too. You know what it's see, it
[40:48] happens. In fact, you know, somebody was
[40:51] saying this recently, somebody was saying, I can't remember who
[40:52] was telling me this. And it's also some people see on
[40:54] social media, they say that start getting your suggestion by
[40:57] just applying for places you even need just even even if it's
[41:01] king now work, just apply for king now work when I tell you no
[41:04] king now work. So they can tell you you're not
[41:07] qualified for this. You know, and I think this, this
[41:12] whole conversation actually tells us that we as men need to
[41:15] talk to each other more. There's a lot of talking
[41:18] together that we don't because every time we talk is always
[41:19] motivation Guy, that was the next move.
[41:21] It's not every time was the next move.
[41:23] Have we addressed the previous one, that previous one that I
[41:26] told, you know, how do you feel about it?
[41:28] Do you still feel like, you know, you're not you're not
[41:30] you're not enough for the role? Do you still feel like, you
[41:32] know, you could have done better or have you moved on?
[41:34] Have you understood that hey, maybe those guys are crazy?
[41:37] Not even be that they don't have some.
[41:39] Personally, concerning that one, I've moved on because I've
[41:41] spoken to different people. And they told you those guys are
[41:44] crazy, you know, you know what I kept so, so recently I got
[41:49] rejected from a Turkish visa. And it's been a while that I've
[41:54] been shocked by visa rejection, right?
[41:56] Especially when you don't think about the amount of money you
[41:58] put in. Now, this visa rejection, this
[42:02] visa application was for work. I had a project then that I was
[42:06] meant to go to Turkey to look physically at.
[42:09] The materials were meant to purchase.
[42:10] They were doing some fabrication.
[42:11] We needed to because I was the one that did design.
[42:14] I needed to make sure they were getting everything to the T
[42:16] wasn't just yeah, you don't video call me if I can get over
[42:18] there physically, let me get there.
[42:20] Let me get physically. I was being backed up by a
[42:22] company. They were all the documented
[42:24] they could possibly need. Everything was there and, you
[42:29] know, they kept saying that, oh, this is going to take this long.
[42:32] This is going to. I said just run the process.
[42:34] Just want me to come back later after spending so much money.
[42:38] I'm sorry, but we've rejected you and the words You don't give
[42:42] me a reason why you don't give me a reason why.
[42:44] You're just letting me know that I'm just, I was just ineligible
[42:47] for the, for the, for the. Yeah, I just, I'm being granted
[42:51] the RBV. Visa.
[42:52] I feel like in general, man, if I'm if I come, I pay.
[42:55] I say give me visa. Are you tell me no, Give me no.
[42:58] You see that discussion you get? But you know, but it's been a
[43:05] while that I've had to, I'm bringing this up because it's
[43:08] been long. So, you know, there's some
[43:09] rejections that you face. And I think this one you just
[43:12] experienced recently is one of those ones where you might have
[43:15] been getting like small, small rejections that you're not like,
[43:17] I don't know, I'm used to. Then this one, this one came as
[43:22] a wait. This kind of rejection can still
[43:24] happen in my life. Is it knowing everywhere go
[43:26] first? Blur everywhere.
[43:27] Go first. Blur and I think that's where
[43:30] that won't prove it because again, I think think about it
[43:31] from the aspect of you've spoken to the guys on the other side
[43:35] letting them know look, hey, I'll be there by this date, make
[43:38] sure everything is set out ready for me to have a review because
[43:39] I need to approve everything before I leave.
[43:41] I only have one week to get everything done.
[43:43] Every everything was in place. It was just for me to get that
[43:47] visa and go Now it was more painful because like what do you
[43:53] mean you're rejecting me for work I'm going to do.
[43:56] You've asked me for proof of you.
[43:57] I'm not going to. Play.
[43:59] I'm going to go and spend money which can buy goods like what
[44:03] does. You so that stopped me from
[44:05] making the money that I wanted to make to that see, see, see
[44:09] you see there's there's rejection that is just tied to
[44:11] your emotions and there's rejection that is tied to your
[44:14] life plans. That's the plans.
[44:16] That's the bag, man. And then you see that and I
[44:18] think, of course, we at this stage now, those are mostly the
[44:22] rejections we deal with. You guys telling me, no, I'm
[44:28] thinking about my life now and something has just happened that
[44:31] is waking me up again. Because you see all that
[44:33] training throughout the years that you think you've solidified
[44:36] your grounding, bro. There's some rejections like
[44:39] you'll just wake you up again and they'll test you.
[44:43] So those old hobbies want to come back and you're like, just
[44:45] calm down. Just calm down.
[44:46] No, no, I was tested now don't pass me this.
[44:49] Come to the next one. It's actually crazy.
[44:51] It's actually crazy. And I think I think one of my
[44:56] one of my most notable rejections was a contract that I
[45:01] wanted to do and they had called me in now here this, so here why
[45:06] they rejected me. They had called me in, asked me
[45:11] for like a previous portfolio, asked me for previous projects.
[45:15] You even asked me about what I think I can deliver based on
[45:17] this new project, right? Give me some details.
[45:19] Everything like bro, everybody in the room was bedazzled.
[45:22] There's no, you know, when I watched them, you know when I'm
[45:24] just in the stage of life where I'm like, look, I'm not I'm not
[45:27] questioning whether I'm good at this shit or not.
[45:28] Like I know I. AM.
[45:30] It's just whether I fit into the role you guys want for.
[45:33] I've been going to pay me or not, are you?
[45:35] Going to pay me good money. Exactly.
[45:36] I'm not doing all this work for. Working hard brew.
[45:39] I've worked hard already, too many years now working smart.
[45:42] Do you know? Do you know what the?
[45:43] Do you know what the in fact, they they didn't, they didn't
[45:46] even tell it to my face. All they just told me was we'll
[45:49] get back to you. And then later I said,
[45:51] unfortunately, we'll be going, we'll be going with someone
[45:53] else. Now.
[45:54] Now, this seemed like a normal rejection, right?
[45:57] Because it's not the first time you put in time, effort, they
[45:59] reject it. It happens.
[46:00] I don't know. Let me tell you where you're
[46:03] paying me the most. So I had an inside person that
[46:05] once in a while I was just like, you know, OK.
[46:07] So I mean, what happened? Everybody seemed like they were
[46:09] happy with it. So I got more.
[46:11] You too sharp for the barrel they say this one, this one this
[46:14] one, this one go if you run rocket with.
[46:17] You, that's exactly what you know, you know, they told.
[46:19] Me because they said, man, this guy's to look when this guy's
[46:21] spoken. To the bro that's bro see, see,
[46:23] you know what they told me? They told me I think it's the
[46:28] country we live, but and they told me that it's on that you're
[46:31] always dressed in sharp like this and you know me, I rock
[46:34] suits. I really love it.
[46:35] So this only I always just sharp like that.
[46:36] You sure you'll be able to do the projects?
[46:38] What the fuck? You know, you know, you know
[46:42] what? You know why that Well, that's
[46:44] my most notable rejection because I couldn't go back to
[46:47] them to see what the fuck are you talking about because they
[46:51] didn't come to me to say directly.
[46:54] I couldn't even channel it through the person because the
[46:56] person knows that I'm the person will share my sentiment in the
[46:59] she doesn't understand what the hell they're talking about.
[47:02] I had no way to put it. I was, I was beyond frustrated
[47:09] and I could see myself going back into shooting in again.
[47:11] And I said, no, I don't know, bro.
[47:13] And you know, that my shortening phase is even if another person
[47:15] did call me for work, I just had to come in.
[47:17] But I'm not because at that point I just feel like everybody
[47:19] wants to waste my time. But I see how that also kills me
[47:22] from, you know, getting some opportunities that will come
[47:24] once in, in, in my lifetime. But that particular rejection,
[47:28] I'll still say that till today, I struggle with it because I, I
[47:32] would think just that I was lucky that I knew to myself that
[47:35] back then. Oh I already I knew my worth.
[47:38] If I didn't know my word that thing would have broken me
[47:40] completely because I also thinking should I not?
[47:42] Should I not just nice to meetings anymore so that they
[47:44] won't think that I'm I said no that's everywhere.
[47:48] The next break I had I showed up just up.
[47:50] I haven't dyed myself, I want to do it.
[47:56] Gets to that point where like, you know what man, I know I
[47:58] started this stuff at this point is if you want to you want it If
[48:01] you pick me, I'll go I'll get his mouth for you I'll kill it
[48:04] for you if you don't pick me, you don't pick me let.
[48:06] Me, let me tell you what now sweetened me that now give me
[48:10] the colours that are an inside person, the other person they
[48:12] went with. So this other person is also on
[48:14] the team right Halfway through the said, I mean, well should I
[48:19] have gone with you? The clients are complaining.
[48:21] They're saying this other guy would have done better than this
[48:23] person they went to pick. I'll give you another look now
[48:28] just. Look, I say, yeah, I mean, I
[48:30] mean, you think I'm upset. I know that you people are not
[48:33] serious. Like, if you guys are serious
[48:34] about your work, you would know who to really pick, you know?
[48:36] And I'm just not going to allow myself be thrown off by stuff
[48:41] like that, you know? So in all of this, we're trying
[48:43] seriously is that we've, we've experienced like rejection in so
[48:46] many ways, but it's never the end of the world.
[48:48] Because trust me, there are some days it feels like it's.
[48:50] Oh my God, I just remembered something.
[48:52] Yeah. See this rejection, it's not
[48:54] like as deep as your work rejection.
[48:55] I just remember this was. Do you remember back then this
[48:58] was I was still in second. Do you remember when this is
[49:01] family rejection? Now my mom's seen.
[49:02] Mommy, this was you, so I was doing.
[49:04] Family rejection is tough. Remember back then when what's
[49:07] his Beyoncé and Jay-Z came this day concert?
[49:10] Yeah, of course this was, This was.
[49:14] Can't remember the year 20 exactly. 2013 that first entry.
[49:17] Beyoncé and Jay-Z came this day. Concert bro had a friend whose
[49:21] mom used to work in NTA. 2000 and.
[49:23] NTA she gave everybody press pass.
[49:27] That is backstage. That is why we didn't know that
[49:29] is. Backstage I get bro, you're not.
[49:32] Gonna go for this concert, My mom said I can't go.
[49:37] I can still hear the pain. Oh shit bro.
[49:43] Not a big right. There's no that face.
[49:47] We could not did that. How much Yon luko?
[49:50] Nothing that's the of all this from she to enter our Voltron
[49:52] moves just back by lock up. Other times they knew say why so
[49:56] I was rude yesterday. Oh my God, mommy is Beyoncé's
[50:05] Jay-Z. Oh God, you know you can punish
[50:09] me tomorrow. Punish me tomorrow, grab me for
[50:11] the rest of the month. But this particular today, zero,
[50:19] you know. So today I want you somewhere.
[50:21] Here. See, that's why.
[50:22] That's why I was going to say that.
[50:25] I've seen brick and leers in our DPS.
[50:27] Your love is wicked. Bro well you saw wickedness, it
[50:31] just wasn't the. Because the truth is this, you
[50:38] see that kind of rejection. Actually, I think that's the
[50:40] most painful because see. The reaction I used to pay now
[50:43] year was, yeah, that. Yeah, wait, you see, everybody's
[50:48] going out to play. You see, Mommy can I, they say.
[50:51] No, I think we share this in one of the previous episodes.
[50:56] And the worst part is you see the Monday after the Monday
[50:58] after. Everybody's talking about it,
[51:00] bro. You cannot contribute to
[51:02] conversation. You are lost in the source.
[51:05] There's nothing more painful. You know why?
[51:07] And this is what I'm seeing. That is the most painful, at
[51:09] least for the job. You can still vex.
[51:11] And seeing that those people decrease, Does it not even
[51:14] matter? Chris, do you really want to say
[51:17] that? Yeah.
[51:17] Mommy. Chris.
[51:18] No. Even if you want to go to your
[51:21] brother's or your sister's to complain about anything, they
[51:24] are also in the same fact. They look at you and say it's
[51:26] good now. Me too.
[51:27] Mommy told me no yesterday. So there's no way for you to put
[51:29] it. There's there's no way to put
[51:31] it. You're going to hold on to it
[51:32] for years to come. You know, some people even hold
[51:35] it to the actual generally like you.
[51:36] You. I will show you that.
[51:38] You know what? Tell me you must collect.
[51:42] You may have some. Have some penny for my young.
[51:44] Oh my goodness, I have some penny for them.
[51:47] You know, I've always said that when I have children, I'm going
[51:49] to just for this, just for the, just for the sake of it.
[51:52] You know. Just where are you going?
[51:55] OK, that party, I'll be like, no, you know, come, come.
[51:58] Then then just for the sake of it too, one person needs to
[52:01] collect 1 factory reset slab. Yes, just give me one.
[52:08] Now you come back to normal to default Windows XP.
[52:14] Hey, you come back to default mode.
[52:15] So me now I'm only adding to give them default moods.
[52:25] I think, I think and I think a lot of the audience will be able
[52:27] to relate to this, that parental rejection.
[52:31] Next level. You see those ones, you see
[52:33] those ones where almost parents are very brazen.
[52:38] You see the ones where party right now in that party, let's
[52:43] say the kids want to go to like a different persons house
[52:46] afterwards. So that I said okay, the parents
[52:48] are going to be here now in front of all the other parents.
[52:51] The can I go to everybody saying yes, yes.
[52:57] No, sorry, he can't come. The worst part is even when
[53:04] maybe your dad is even trying to let him go and he almost no, no,
[53:07] no, he goes out. He goes out every day.
[53:10] He goes out every day. This particular is not going to
[53:12] I go. You have not gone out in one
[53:13] year. You see, You see how that
[53:18] rejection follows you now? Nobody's trying to come to your
[53:21] house. Nobody's even trying to invite
[53:23] you because there are no your mom going to allow you.
[53:25] Is your mom going to allow you? You're fighting for your life
[53:28] because where do I put this frustration?
[53:31] Where where you hold it for years and you're like, OK, no
[53:35] problem, my children, you must fight because there's no way.
[53:37] It's crazy. And you know, I think obviously
[53:39] it's fun times, but a lot of times the parents need to know
[53:42] that those things they hold us or they hold us.
[53:44] You know, sometimes it even effects how you navigate your
[53:48] social life because now that you have the freedom where somebody
[53:50] doesn't say no to you, you go All in all the parties you'll.
[53:55] Go. I love with a lot of people now.
[53:56] Lots of people. But I start thinking I just want
[53:58] to let him lose. Just small.
[54:00] Even even that university life that you go for, that's the
[54:02] first time we've really experienced.
[54:04] Nobody's saying no to you. So you mean I can just?
[54:07] You mean I can just ask permission What's.
[54:10] And unfortunately some people don't know how to contribute.
[54:12] Yeah. Well, yeah, it's it's it's a
[54:14] it's a real thing. And guys, let us know what you
[54:17] guys have experienced based on rejection.
[54:19] I think, I think it's something that everybody has definitely
[54:21] faced. How do you guys handle your
[54:23] rejections? You know, how are you guys able
[54:24] to navigate being told no? Does it make you feel less?
[54:28] Does it make you feel like striving for more?
[54:31] You know, that's that's that's all you guys think.
[54:33] And yeah, I think this was an amazing episode.
[54:35] As usual. We've run out of time again.
[54:40] You guys in the back of house should give us more time.
[54:42] Audience wants more time, right guys?
[54:44] But anyways, before we go, remember guys, always subscribe
[54:48] to our podcast on YouTube, all our audio platforms, Spotify,
[54:53] Apple, follow us on Instagram, follow us on TikTok, send us
[54:57] emails of your dilemmas. Let's see what you guys are
[55:00] going through. Let's, you know, give our own
[55:02] take on whatever it is. We care.
[55:03] We're no experts. Again, we're just sharing
[55:05] experiences and letting you guys know how we've lived our own
[55:08] lives. But until next time guys, my
[55:11] name is Morale Conclare. And I miss you all, K12.
[55:15] And this is.

Shows are listed from Apple Podcasts' charts and directory, and Podcast Index where it is used. Every show and episode belongs to its publisher and plays from the publisher's own feed; this site hosts none of them.