# Love, Faith & Finding Purpose in the Waiting (Guest: Kittie Rose)

An episode of [Dear Future Wifey](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1506095537), 13 Aug 2025, 1 h 27 min.

Audio: https://prfx.byspotify.com/e/traffic.omny.fm/d/clips/78a347aa-3282-4ac5-837c-a72300032082/293692a5-5b4e-44f3-89a3-b172011fe37c/df443829-a77d-4293-9d92-b3380056be86/audio.mp3?utm_source=Podcast&in_playlist=ae4e871a-36ca-4d76-83c3-b172011fe393

Kittie’s story is raw, inspiring, and a reminder that waiting well is never wasted. #DearFutureWifey #KittieRose #ChristianDating #PurposefulLove #FaithAndRelationships #godstiming 📸 CONNECT WITH OUR GUEST https://www.instagram.com/kittiejrose https://www.instagram.com/ DEAR FUTURE WIFEY LIVE x TOM JOYNER FOUNDATION FANTASTIC VOYAGE 2025 https://fantasticvoyage.blackamericaweb.com/ PROMO CODE: WIFEY WANNA SEE BEHIND-THE-SCENES FOOTAGE? JOIN MY PATREON https://www.Patreon.com/laterrasrwhitfield SIGN UP FOR THE MAILING LIST https://bit.ly/LRWconnection PURCHASE "YOU (Dear Future Wifey)" Theme Song http://itunes.apple.com/album/id/1729993404 👑 SUPPORT OUR CAUSE Donate to Kingdom Royale: Empowering foster kids to become royalty: https://www.KingdomRoyale.com 👕 MERCH https://www.DearFutureWifey.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

## Transcript

[0:00] Speaker 1: You've been advocating for marriage. Sometimes it comes off extremely harsh.
[0:04] Speaker 2: What is that about.
[0:05] Speaker 3: I don't like when people play about marriage because essentially
[0:07] Speaker 3: you're planning about God, and I have an issue with that.
[0:09] Speaker 3: We are a living picture of Christ's relationship with the church.
[0:13] Speaker 3: People need to be able to find God in our marriage,
[0:15] Speaker 3: and so that's the reason why.
[0:17] Speaker 1: I speak the way that I do well to their
[0:18] Speaker 1: future wife podcast Kitty Rose is in the building.
[0:21] Speaker 3: Come on now, yeah, Glory to God. I love a
[0:25] Speaker 3: believer my whole life. I've been heavy in the church. However,
[0:28] Speaker 3: there was a time where I was out there in
[0:29] Speaker 3: that world having a little bit too much fun.
[0:31] Speaker 2: What was spoken over your life?
[0:32] Speaker 3: When I was younger, I forgot what the woman's name was,
[0:35] Speaker 3: but she said I was going to be a singer.
[0:36] Speaker 3: They wanted me the same gospel, and I'm like, they
[0:38] Speaker 3: seemed too hard going viral.
[0:41] Speaker 2: Yet yes I have.
[0:42] Speaker 4: So let me be like when I say.
[0:43] Speaker 3: That I've been practicing nursing for over a decade. My
[0:46] Speaker 3: aunt Chandra told my mom I keep seeing her on
[0:48] Speaker 3: the stage. God said that he allowed her to do nursing,
[0:50] Speaker 3: but that's not her calling. I was like, oh, good,
[0:52] Speaker 3: I'm gonna be singing, No, I'm going to be speaking
[0:55] Speaker 3: over marriages.
[0:56] Speaker 4: I just didn't feel qualified.
[0:57] Speaker 2: Can we shout your husband out here?
[0:59] Speaker 4: You know, I'm glad you said that.
[1:01] Speaker 3: I'm married, I'm love, I'm nurtured, I'm protected, I am
[1:04] Speaker 3: provided for in real life.
[1:05] Speaker 1: Some people like, oh, are you this relationship person? Why
[1:08] Speaker 1: don't you ever do interviews with your husband?
[1:10] Speaker 3: I just don't want to expose my marriage. Everybody goud
[1:12] Speaker 3: still working on that part of me. I would go
[1:13] Speaker 3: back and forward with you behind my marriage.
[1:15] Speaker 2: How did y'all meet?
[1:15] Speaker 3: We've been knowing each other's we were thirteen, never dated.
[1:17] Speaker 3: We've always been really fond of each other. He would
[1:20] Speaker 3: call me at random times while I was in the
[1:22] Speaker 3: midst of a problem. My tire is flat, my break
[1:25] Speaker 3: life just went out, and it sat him saying, do
[1:27] Speaker 3: you have somebody to help you? It was always sending
[1:28] Speaker 3: your location. He will always make sure that he looked
[1:31] Speaker 3: out for me. I made a video and I had
[1:33] Speaker 3: posted and he's in the comments and he's like, I
[1:35] Speaker 3: have all of those qualities, and I was like, oh.
[1:39] Speaker 2: Is that what you did?
[1:40] Speaker 1: How does someone not make the idol I desire marriage?
[1:44] Speaker 1: I'm about to hit forty years old.
[1:46] Speaker 3: That's how you know right there you were fighting against
[1:48] Speaker 3: an imaginary clock. That's a key indication that that has
[1:51] Speaker 3: become an idol.
[1:51] Speaker 1: I want you to speak to single women who have
[1:54] Speaker 1: grown weary in their well doing.
[1:56] Speaker 4: Hey, single Babies.
[1:59] Speaker 2: The Future Wife podcast has global impact.
[2:02] Speaker 3: From Texas, I have been on this journey of healing
[2:05] Speaker 3: and self discovery, and this podcast has been a vital
[2:09] Speaker 3: part of my process.
[2:11] Speaker 1: God's establishing through you a legacy, a display of freedom,
[2:16] Speaker 1: founding authentic spirituality California.
[2:19] Speaker 4: I learned so much as a single man through your podcast,
[2:23] Speaker 4: and continue to learn so much as now a married
[2:26] Speaker 4: man Nigeria. This is just therapy for me.
[2:29] Speaker 1: You know, I've been healed, I've been strengthen in my
[2:32] Speaker 1: convictions on the STI to do Single hoopta.
[2:35] Speaker 3: Amsterdam way that you've shown us how it is possible
[2:39] Speaker 3: for a.
[2:40] Speaker 4: Man to be as intentional as you are.
[2:44] Speaker 2: New Jersey.
[2:45] Speaker 4: I appreciate your vulnerability.
[2:47] Speaker 3: I appreciate just being able to see that there is
[2:49] Speaker 3: life after divorce.
[2:50] Speaker 2: To New York.
[2:52] Speaker 3: I am a single woman, so these episodes really give
[2:55] Speaker 3: me hope and courage that God does have a husband
[2:57] Speaker 3: for me.
[2:58] Speaker 2: Discover unco and Recover Love.
[3:01] Speaker 1: I'm Laterra Sar Whitfield and this is season ten of
[3:04] Speaker 1: the Dear Future Wifie podcasts. Welcome to the Dear Future
[3:07] Speaker 1: Wifie podcast. I'm your host, Latera Sar Wifield. Listen, are
[3:10] Speaker 1: you still shacking up with us? If you're still shacking
[3:12] Speaker 1: up with us, come on, can we get a commitment?
[3:14] Speaker 1: Hit that subscription button and subscribe. Make sure you're chewing
[3:17] Speaker 1: your notification bell so you'll be notified about upcoming episodes.
[3:21] Speaker 2: And as I.
[3:22] Speaker 1: Expressed last week, the patriarch is in full force, so
[3:26] Speaker 1: make sure you head over click the link of the
[3:28] Speaker 1: description sign up for the Patreon. Also click the link
[3:31] Speaker 1: and the description and sign up for the melon list.
[3:34] Speaker 1: We have some excited things coming down the pipeline.
[3:38] Speaker 2: You know what.
[3:39] Speaker 1: A lot of y'all been asking me to interview this
[3:41] Speaker 1: particular person. I've been watching her go viral for the
[3:44] Speaker 1: last few years, and I love the way she thinks.
[3:47] Speaker 1: I love her hertpost and everything that she says. She
[3:50] Speaker 1: tries to push people to the feet of God, and
[3:53] Speaker 1: so I love people who champion their faith. And so,
[3:57] Speaker 1: without further ado, welcome to Dear Future wife podcast. My
[4:00] Speaker 1: homie Kitty Rose is in the building.
[4:03] Speaker 4: You're gonna have me crying over here.
[4:05] Speaker 2: You're gonna cry because we.
[4:06] Speaker 3: Started off in prayers. Then I had something good come
[4:09] Speaker 3: on now.
[4:09] Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, Glory to God. I love it.
[4:11] Speaker 2: Listen. So let me ask you this, how long have
[4:13] Speaker 2: you been a believer?
[4:14] Speaker 4: My whole life? My whole life. I was raised in
[4:17] Speaker 4: the church. I was raised really church church for real, Yeah,
[4:21] Speaker 4: Solomon McGee.
[4:22] Speaker 3: We come from a bloodline, now sold all right, we
[4:25] Speaker 3: come from a blood line, and I've been heavy in
[4:27] Speaker 3: the church. However, there was a time where I'm not
[4:29] Speaker 3: gonna say I separate because I never separated from God.
[4:32] Speaker 3: I was just sinning. Yeah, it was af there in
[4:34] Speaker 3: that world, having a little bit too much fun.
[4:35] Speaker 2: A little bit too much.
[4:36] Speaker 3: I had a whole bunch of consequences that came with it. Yeah,
[4:39] Speaker 3: And it was honestly, it was last year. Actually it
[4:42] Speaker 3: was at the end of last year. Now, granted God
[4:44] Speaker 3: has been tugging on me. I mean he has been tugging,
[4:49] Speaker 3: but I wanted to still live the life that I
[4:50] Speaker 3: wanted to live. And last year, after we had a
[4:53] Speaker 3: Christmas party literally the next day, which was actually the
[4:55] Speaker 3: day before you and I were on the show together. Yeah,
[4:58] Speaker 3: that conviction the next on the fifteenth was horrible. It
[5:02] Speaker 3: was a wild as because I was over there taking
[5:05] Speaker 3: shots back to back, and the next day. God was
[5:08] Speaker 3: on me heavy that morning, and the taste for alcohol
[5:13] Speaker 3: was gone, The desire to curse was gone, even to
[5:16] Speaker 3: listen to second music. All of that, like my appetite
[5:19] Speaker 3: for a lot of things were gone. And so when
[5:20] Speaker 3: you saw me on stage that time, that was the
[5:23] Speaker 3: moment where I did. I felt as though I gave
[5:26] Speaker 3: a complete yes, But I didn't find that later on
[5:28] Speaker 3: that I didn't give before yes, I gave somewhat of yes.
[5:30] Speaker 3: But there was still a part of me that was like,
[5:33] Speaker 3: keep my foot over here.
[5:35] Speaker 4: Just a little bit.
[5:35] Speaker 2: I'm keep some little cuss words in my arsenal them. Yeah,
[5:38] Speaker 2: drink little.
[5:39] Speaker 3: God was on me, and I'm glad that he was.
[5:41] Speaker 3: That was my last time that I had a chance
[5:43] Speaker 3: to turn up, and it.
[5:44] Speaker 1: Would tell me he snatched the taste of that in
[5:47] Speaker 1: twenty four hours.
[5:48] Speaker 4: He took everything away from me.
[5:50] Speaker 1: So was it something that you had a conversation with
[5:53] Speaker 1: God about? Was it something that happened that night or
[5:56] Speaker 1: evening that you regretted that you said never again.
[5:58] Speaker 3: Actually it was probably let me see, a couple of
[6:02] Speaker 3: years ago. It was a couple of years ago I
[6:04] Speaker 3: went through something really, really, really traumatic, and I remember
[6:07] Speaker 3: I was crying out to God, and I know the
[6:09] Speaker 3: conversation that he and I had and what God was
[6:11] Speaker 3: telling me to do. But it was really hard for
[6:14] Speaker 3: me to do what God was asking me to do
[6:16] Speaker 3: because it was gonna cost too much of what I
[6:18] Speaker 3: wanted to do with my life. And so I kept
[6:20] Speaker 3: on going and I kept on going, but I'm telling you,
[6:22] Speaker 3: every time it was like God was tugging on me
[6:24] Speaker 3: and I would I would be obedient to like some things,
[6:27] Speaker 3: and some things I wasn't obedient too, until it was
[6:30] Speaker 3: just that moment where God was like, all right, either
[6:32] Speaker 3: you gonna give me your yes or not, and this
[6:35] Speaker 3: is the last offer for you.
[6:37] Speaker 4: And so that was scary because I know how God is.
[6:39] Speaker 4: I'm a dreamer.
[6:40] Speaker 2: He said, it's your last offer.
[6:42] Speaker 3: Yeah, that's my last offer. And I know what that
[6:43] Speaker 3: meant because I had a dream when I was younger.
[6:47] Speaker 3: I had a dream when I was younger. I talked
[6:48] Speaker 3: to my mom and my cousin Ronda about this and
[6:51] Speaker 3: I told him, I said, I remember that I was
[6:52] Speaker 3: at the foot of God and I saw so many
[6:55] Speaker 3: people getting pulled. I saw people standing up in front
[6:57] Speaker 3: of God, but you could not see him his magnitude,
[7:00] Speaker 3: He was so great, so big, and you couldn't hear
[7:03] Speaker 3: what they were saying, but you can feel the presence
[7:05] Speaker 3: in the room, and you can feel when people were
[7:07] Speaker 3: being pulled away from him. And at that time, in
[7:10] Speaker 3: a dream, he told me it was not my time yet.
[7:13] Speaker 3: And I knew from that moment that if I keep
[7:15] Speaker 3: on living the life that I live, I ain't gonna
[7:17] Speaker 3: make it to him. And my mom kept telling me
[7:19] Speaker 3: to stop playing, and I still was playing, and I
[7:23] Speaker 3: learned some valuable lessons while playing. I did, but I
[7:29] Speaker 3: was trained, right. I was trained, so I knew exactly
[7:32] Speaker 3: where to go back to Kolchic has always been in
[7:34] Speaker 3: my heart. But you know, of course, when you get older,
[7:38] Speaker 3: I guess over time, I started going into different churches
[7:41] Speaker 3: and stuff and just kind of like wanting to see
[7:43] Speaker 3: exactly where I wanted to land. And then, of course,
[7:46] Speaker 3: because I'm a seer and I'm a dreamer, and so
[7:48] Speaker 3: I see things as well. And there was one church
[7:50] Speaker 3: that I went to it's a popular church. I'm not
[7:52] Speaker 3: going to say the name. The last service that I
[7:54] Speaker 3: had went to, I saw spirits just roaming inside of
[7:58] Speaker 3: the church, and it caused me to kind of freak
[8:00] Speaker 3: out in a church. And my cousin was with me.
[8:02] Speaker 3: My cousin and my ex best friend. They were all women.
[8:04] Speaker 3: They were like, are you okay? And I'm like, we
[8:06] Speaker 3: got to go. And I was seeing just like distorted faces,
[8:08] Speaker 3: thestorted figures and all of that.
[8:10] Speaker 4: And it took me a minute to go back to
[8:11] Speaker 4: church after that took me a minute.
[8:15] Speaker 2: That's interesting.
[8:16] Speaker 1: The day I gave my life to Christ, well, the
[8:18] Speaker 1: next day, it was December the twenty second of nineteen
[8:21] Speaker 1: ninety six, and I was in Lakeside Club and I
[8:26] Speaker 1: saw the same thing over people's heads. And I was
[8:28] Speaker 1: sitting there, and I was there and I was like,
[8:31] Speaker 1: I was hanging out with my homeboy's birthday and I
[8:35] Speaker 1: started looking around and I just started seeing spirits over
[8:38] Speaker 1: people's heads. And then I would hear the music or
[8:40] Speaker 1: whatever Luke Skywalker was, you know, pumping through the speakers,
[8:44] Speaker 1: and I'm hearing the music and everything started going in
[8:47] Speaker 1: slow motion. I just started seeing spirits over people's heads.
[8:49] Speaker 1: And I said, oh, I can't. I don't want to
[8:51] Speaker 1: go to club mom. And I left the next day
[8:53] Speaker 1: and gave my life to Christ. Rededicated my life to Christ.
[8:56] Speaker 4: At eighteen, I like rededicate.
[8:58] Speaker 3: You know what my mom used to always telled me
[9:00] Speaker 3: since I was a little girl, She's always said, that's
[9:02] Speaker 3: a gift. When I got older, I told mom, I said,
[9:04] Speaker 3: that's a curse. I said, this ain't always a gift
[9:07] Speaker 3: because you see so much, and like some spaces you
[9:10] Speaker 3: won't even be in because you see them. And so
[9:13] Speaker 3: I've been a sea my whole life. The enemy has
[9:15] Speaker 3: been attacked me my whole life. It was a certain
[9:17] Speaker 3: time of each year around fall, closer to the Halloween,
[9:20] Speaker 3: closer to like the October time, and in my sleep
[9:23] Speaker 3: every night I would have nightmares. And you can see that,
[9:25] Speaker 3: I can feel the demons literally attacked me in my sleep.
[9:28] Speaker 3: And so each year was the same thing up until
[9:31] Speaker 3: I was seventeen. I was pregnant with my daughter. At
[9:33] Speaker 3: seventeen years old, I have never been attacked the way
[9:36] Speaker 3: that I was.
[9:37] Speaker 4: That night. It was a full on attack.
[9:39] Speaker 3: Her dad was seeing me being attacked in my sleep,
[9:42] Speaker 3: and I woke up screaming, and my sister came out
[9:45] Speaker 3: of the room, her husband came out a room. They
[9:47] Speaker 3: tried to grab me, but I kept seeing spirits. And
[9:49] Speaker 3: then that night my mom took me to an evangelist
[9:51] Speaker 3: and they all prayed over me. And then that was
[9:53] Speaker 3: that walk from there, and I never had any problem
[9:55] Speaker 3: since then.
[9:56] Speaker 2: He was how old seventeen?
[9:57] Speaker 3: I was seventeen at that time. Nineteen years old is
[9:59] Speaker 3: one I got saved. That's when I fully gave my
[10:01] Speaker 3: life to Christ. And then at nineteen, I'm young. I'm vulnerable, right,
[10:06] Speaker 3: I'm over here listening to Trinity five seven and stuff.
[10:09] Speaker 3: I got stuff on cassettes because I had a mission
[10:11] Speaker 3: Bishi Galant and I'm sitting in here now I'm trying
[10:14] Speaker 3: to say, wasn't it. I removed every CD anything secular
[10:19] Speaker 3: that I had. I was reading a word consistently. But
[10:22] Speaker 3: I was nineteen, and you lose a lot of friends
[10:24] Speaker 3: when you go through that walk, and so I lost
[10:27] Speaker 3: a lot of friends. People didn't want to be around me.
[10:29] Speaker 3: They told me I became too holy. It was just
[10:31] Speaker 3: such an isolating experience. And I remember my sister, she
[10:35] Speaker 3: was doing this modeling thing and she had a group
[10:37] Speaker 3: of women that they were modeling together, and she said,
[10:39] Speaker 3: I want you to join me, and I was like, Okay,
[10:41] Speaker 3: that's cool. I didn't see no problem with it until
[10:43] Speaker 3: we had to go to the club. And that's where
[10:46] Speaker 3: it got me, gotcha, because I was getting attention, the
[10:50] Speaker 3: attention that I knew for a fact, mal attention that
[10:53] Speaker 3: I was deprived of throughout the majority of my life,
[10:56] Speaker 3: specifically for my dad. But I was deprived of that,
[10:59] Speaker 3: and the enemy new that was your weakness right there,
[11:02] Speaker 3: and it got me. And when I tell you, that
[11:04] Speaker 3: was the worst I was in nursing school in nineteen
[11:06] Speaker 3: I was in nursing school and every drive to clinicals,
[11:09] Speaker 3: every drive up to the campus was the worst drive
[11:12] Speaker 3: because I would cry every day because it was so
[11:15] Speaker 3: hard for me to get back to God. It was
[11:17] Speaker 3: just so hard for me. It was hard for me
[11:19] Speaker 3: to listen to a sermon, to listen to a gospel.
[11:21] Speaker 3: Soon it was hard to get back to God.
[11:23] Speaker 1: Really, So give language to that. Why you think that was?
[11:27] Speaker 1: You had this upbringing, always was raised in church. Now
[11:30] Speaker 1: you rededicate your life to Christ at nineteen years old,
[11:33] Speaker 1: you go to the club, it pulls you back into
[11:36] Speaker 1: this wayward mentality lifestyle. But you have this conviction in
[11:40] Speaker 1: your heart that leads you to cry week before the
[11:43] Speaker 1: Lord because you feel so separated from him. What made
[11:46] Speaker 1: it so hard to just say, let me, let me
[11:49] Speaker 1: stop whatever I'm doing and just get back on the right.
[11:52] Speaker 3: Path Because I was living in my own will, and
[11:54] Speaker 3: it's a lot more enticing to live me your will
[11:56] Speaker 3: rather than God's. God's will comes with a major cost,
[12:00] Speaker 3: to the personal cost. And I wasn't ready to give
[12:03] Speaker 3: up my pride. I wasn't ready to give up the thrills.
[12:06] Speaker 3: I wasn't ready to give up none of that I
[12:08] Speaker 3: thought I was. And then also that was a really
[12:12] Speaker 3: vulnerable age. Yet you know, of course I had my
[12:14] Speaker 3: mom behind me. But when you don't have your friends
[12:17] Speaker 3: that you have for so long and it's just you
[12:20] Speaker 3: in that isolation, you get lonely in the isolation. And
[12:24] Speaker 3: I wasn't yet accustomed to being okay with being alone.
[12:28] Speaker 3: So that was my struggle.
[12:29] Speaker 2: And how long did that last? From nineteen to what age?
[12:32] Speaker 4: That lasted? Jesus over decade? Over decade. It lasted for
[12:41] Speaker 4: over decade.
[12:42] Speaker 3: And I only know that because me and my best
[12:43] Speaker 3: friend were hosting a Bible study a couple of weeks back,
[12:46] Speaker 3: and we were in Exodus and we were talking about shame,
[12:49] Speaker 3: and we weren't going to talk about it at first.
[12:51] Speaker 3: I was like, Okay, I don't know what the Lord
[12:53] Speaker 3: is telling us to do with this Bible study. We're
[12:55] Speaker 3: just gonna go on the Bible studying whatever. So that
[12:57] Speaker 3: Friday we were studying and I was like, let's She said,
[13:00] Speaker 3: let's pray, and I said, I mean, I don't know
[13:02] Speaker 3: if you need to pray, we just go ahead. And
[13:03] Speaker 3: she was like, let's pray, and I was like all right.
[13:05] Speaker 3: So we prayed and immediately the Holy Spirit registered shame
[13:09] Speaker 3: in her spirit. And then we start studying it and
[13:12] Speaker 3: the Holy Spirit just opens our eyes and we're talking
[13:15] Speaker 3: about shame. And here I am full on having to
[13:18] Speaker 3: break down in tears because I didn't realize that for
[13:21] Speaker 3: so long. The reason why it was hard for me
[13:23] Speaker 3: to go back to God is because I was operating
[13:25] Speaker 3: and living in shame. The enemy is so pervasive with
[13:29] Speaker 3: the way he speaks to you and the way he
[13:31] Speaker 3: gets in your head, and so when he makes you
[13:34] Speaker 3: feel shame, he tells you that you're wrong, that you're
[13:37] Speaker 3: too damaged that you're not good enough to go back
[13:39] Speaker 3: to God. And so for the longest I realized that
[13:42] Speaker 3: was the voice that kept playing in my head. And
[13:45] Speaker 3: every time I made a mistake, every time I sinned,
[13:48] Speaker 3: every time I did something that would grieve the spirit,
[13:50] Speaker 3: I would feel shame. And so it just kept pulling
[13:53] Speaker 3: me and pulling me. And that was such a moment
[13:56] Speaker 3: of deliverance when I had that, because I needed that,
[13:59] Speaker 3: I cried so hard. I needed that. And when we
[14:01] Speaker 3: went into Bible study, I ended up. I was in
[14:04] Speaker 3: the spirit. My best friend was just like, just go.
[14:06] Speaker 3: It sounded like it was a sermon. I was in it,
[14:08] Speaker 3: just going, and we went into a prayer. That prayer
[14:11] Speaker 3: went to going. I started talking about Exus, we were
[14:13] Speaker 3: talking about Moses, and then I just started talking to
[14:15] Speaker 3: our students and it's always like over five hundred people
[14:18] Speaker 3: and a lot of people were in there. The that's
[14:21] Speaker 3: my virtual Bible study that I have Saturday morning. Yeah,
[14:25] Speaker 3: it's over two thousand people register right.
[14:27] Speaker 4: Now like that.
[14:31] Speaker 3: Yeah, yes, And it was so many people just by
[14:36] Speaker 3: looking at the chat that was struggling with shame, and
[14:40] Speaker 3: I said, oh wow, And that's exactly how the enemy
[14:42] Speaker 3: gets us. We think that it's guilt. Guilt tells you
[14:45] Speaker 3: I did something wrong. Shame tells you I am wrong.
[14:47] Speaker 3: Guilt tells you I made a mistake. Shame says I am.
[14:50] Speaker 2: I'm gonna say it. Come on back, teach you.
[14:52] Speaker 4: Hear what I'm saying.
[14:53] Speaker 3: And so a lot of times, because we have not
[14:55] Speaker 3: addressed the guilt and it's been unprocessed, that guilt now
[14:59] Speaker 3: manifests into shame and we're operating in it, and the
[15:01] Speaker 3: devil's having a field day seeing the fact that I'm
[15:04] Speaker 3: keeping you away from going back to God. And we
[15:06] Speaker 3: know that we're dealing with shame when we say, well,
[15:08] Speaker 3: I go to God about this all the time. I
[15:09] Speaker 3: can't go back. He's not gonna forgive me. And we
[15:12] Speaker 3: forget about God's unchanging nature. And that's what I was
[15:15] Speaker 3: struggling with for so long and had no idea, And
[15:18] Speaker 3: so I would hide.
[15:20] Speaker 4: I would try.
[15:21] Speaker 3: And it's crazy to say that because God is always around,
[15:24] Speaker 3: but I would try to hide from him. You can't
[15:25] Speaker 3: hide your saying from God. He sees everything that you do.
[15:27] Speaker 3: He saw before you did it. But I would try
[15:30] Speaker 3: to hide and then go back and have repent. Lord
[15:34] Speaker 3: I'm sorry I didn't go back and do the same thing.
[15:36] Speaker 3: Half repen we're just bargaining here. That was my struggle.
[15:41] Speaker 3: So I thank God for my best friend, and I
[15:43] Speaker 3: thank God for allowing us to host the Bible studies,
[15:46] Speaker 3: because I did not realize that I was with that,
[15:49] Speaker 3: and so many people look up to me and it's like, y'all,
[15:51] Speaker 3: I'm human.
[15:52] Speaker 4: You'll be surprised.
[15:53] Speaker 3: I go through a lot of the same things, but
[15:55] Speaker 3: that was I was delivered from that shame in that study.
[15:57] Speaker 2: Hey man, I love it.
[15:59] Speaker 1: I love it so and you're saying this was still,
[16:02] Speaker 1: this is recent, and so you come back ten years ago,
[16:07] Speaker 1: a little over a decade, you come back and say, God,
[16:09] Speaker 1: I totally surrender.
[16:10] Speaker 2: What did that look like for you? How did your
[16:12] Speaker 2: life start shaping?
[16:14] Speaker 1: Because I know you said that you you've always been
[16:17] Speaker 1: a seer, So what did you feel like God called
[16:20] Speaker 1: you or maybe your mom told you you're going to
[16:23] Speaker 1: be an evangelist? So what was spoken over your life? Prophetically?
[16:26] Speaker 3: When I was younger, Prophetically, I forgot what the woman's
[16:29] Speaker 3: name was. We were going to Compassionate and Pleasant Grove
[16:33] Speaker 3: and she told my mom.
[16:35] Speaker 4: She told my mom. I had a gift.
[16:36] Speaker 3: But she said I was going to be a singer,
[16:37] Speaker 3: and I've always been singing my whole life. That trained
[16:40] Speaker 3: for opera, so I'm thinking, okay, but they wanted me
[16:43] Speaker 3: the same gospel and I'm like, they sing too hard.
[16:46] Speaker 4: That's what I used to say. I'm like, they seen
[16:49] Speaker 4: to her.
[16:50] Speaker 2: Have you seen what's been going viral? Yeah? Yes I have.
[16:53] Speaker 3: So let me be like when I say that, I
[16:55] Speaker 3: was like, but you know what I was.
[16:58] Speaker 4: I was in the Sunshine Band when I was younger.
[17:00] Speaker 3: I used to have me sing a lead, but I
[17:03] Speaker 3: didn't want to sing gospel. I was like, I could
[17:05] Speaker 3: sing opera and still sing like gospel opera. Like, no,
[17:08] Speaker 3: you can't do that, girl, But I thought that's what
[17:10] Speaker 3: it was going to be.
[17:11] Speaker 2: Could have could have your own job.
[17:13] Speaker 3: But I ain't take that serious because I was still
[17:14] Speaker 3: living my own wheel, right. I still was doing a
[17:16] Speaker 3: whole bunch of things. And I'll get to that in
[17:18] Speaker 3: a little bit, But that's what was spoken over my life.
[17:22] Speaker 3: It's not until a few years back, I want to say,
[17:25] Speaker 3: it was after twenty twenty one, and I was minded,
[17:28] Speaker 3: mind you, I've been practicing nursing for over a decades,
[17:30] Speaker 3: so I was a nurse, and my aunt Sandra told
[17:33] Speaker 3: my mom, she said, I keep seeing her on the
[17:35] Speaker 3: stage and she told my mom she said, God said
[17:39] Speaker 3: that he allowed her to do nursing, but that's not
[17:41] Speaker 3: her calling. And so I was like, oh good, I'm
[17:43] Speaker 3: gonna be singing.
[17:45] Speaker 4: And here I am.
[17:45] Speaker 3: I'm thinking I'm gonna be singing. No, I'm going to
[17:48] Speaker 3: be speaking over marriages. That's my ministry. God revealed that
[17:52] Speaker 3: a long time ago that marriage and counsel was my ministry.
[17:54] Speaker 2: How long goes it?
[17:55] Speaker 4: A couple years ago? Four years ago to be exact?
[17:58] Speaker 1: When you did that, how that you respond that you
[18:01] Speaker 1: automatically start doing it, making videos about it?
[18:03] Speaker 3: Absolutely not counseling. Yes, not marriage. I didn't feel like
[18:09] Speaker 3: I was qualified.
[18:10] Speaker 4: To speak on it.
[18:10] Speaker 2: Were you married at that time?
[18:11] Speaker 3: I only been married at that time. I was not
[18:13] Speaker 3: married that this is my second marriage that i'm in.
[18:15] Speaker 1: So and so you weren't married at that time. And
[18:18] Speaker 1: God said, I'm going to use you for marriage. You
[18:20] Speaker 1: like i've been divorced, choose somebody else.
[18:24] Speaker 3: Yeah, that's exactly what That's exactly what it was. And
[18:27] Speaker 3: I just didn't feel qualified. And so many people, I
[18:31] Speaker 3: guess because he incorporated what he would teach me and
[18:34] Speaker 3: what I would learn in counseling, and then it just
[18:37] Speaker 3: all came together.
[18:38] Speaker 4: And then people tell me, you give a different perspective.
[18:41] Speaker 4: You speak so well.
[18:41] Speaker 3: I can understand things when you break it down, and
[18:44] Speaker 3: I'm like, that ain't nothing but God. But I've been
[18:45] Speaker 3: speaking my whole life. I've always been okay with.
[18:47] Speaker 1: Talking well because you lived it. So that's the thing
[18:50] Speaker 1: about it. A lot of times people try to disqualify
[18:53] Speaker 1: people from things that God has already qualified them for.
[18:55] Speaker 2: Yes, I've been divorced.
[18:56] Speaker 1: I was married for almost ten years, been going on
[19:00] Speaker 1: ten years in December, and people will be like, how
[19:04] Speaker 1: you're gonna have a platform. I ain't gonna say people,
[19:06] Speaker 1: I'm say a small percentage you'll get people like how
[19:08] Speaker 1: you gonna have a platform talking about relationships when you
[19:11] Speaker 1: cheated on your ex wife?
[19:12] Speaker 2: And I'm like, the only way y'all.
[19:14] Speaker 1: Know that is I told y'all of course through my transparency.
[19:17] Speaker 1: I said, people overcome by the word of my testimony.
[19:19] Speaker 1: So that's why I'm giving y'all that so y'all can
[19:21] Speaker 1: know that. So that the person that has mismanaged their
[19:25] Speaker 1: spouse in the past that they're not disqualified from love.
[19:28] Speaker 1: And God would use people like you and me to
[19:32] Speaker 1: be able to say, here's my scars, this is what
[19:34] Speaker 1: it is, that's what I did.
[19:35] Speaker 2: I ain't perfect.
[19:35] Speaker 1: I made mistakes, and this is how you heal from it,
[19:38] Speaker 1: and this is how you grow from it and let
[19:39] Speaker 1: me help you not make the same mistakes.
[19:42] Speaker 3: And I'm grateful for God and his reminder because God
[19:46] Speaker 3: does not call the qualified, but he qualifies those that
[19:49] Speaker 3: he's called. And I've had to learn that because I
[19:53] Speaker 3: sometimes I look at myself, I'm like, this is supernatural,
[19:55] Speaker 3: because I don't know how I just came up with that, y'all.
[19:57] Speaker 3: The Lord is working through me right now. I don't
[19:59] Speaker 3: know so, and I'm grateful. I really am grateful for that.
[20:03] Speaker 3: I didn't feel like I was qualified, but I realized,
[20:06] Speaker 3: especially because a lot of people reassure me with that.
[20:09] Speaker 3: A lot of people come to me, especially married couples.
[20:11] Speaker 3: They're like, you know, you helped me here, And I'm like, oh,
[20:14] Speaker 3: that's a good feeling, is Lord?
[20:16] Speaker 2: It is? Yeah?
[20:17] Speaker 1: Can we can we shout your husband out? He's sitting
[20:19] Speaker 1: right here. Yeah you know what I'm saying, Yeah, you know, Yeah,
[20:22] Speaker 1: she married for real, y'all.
[20:24] Speaker 3: I'm glad you said that because people just think I'm
[20:27] Speaker 3: just sat here.
[20:27] Speaker 4: Just no, she ain't married for real.
[20:29] Speaker 3: No, I'm married, I'm love, I'm nurtured, I'm protected, I
[20:33] Speaker 3: am provided for in real life.
[20:34] Speaker 2: Oh you a better talk that thing.
[20:36] Speaker 3: I'm happy talked in real life in real life. Yeah,
[20:39] Speaker 3: I just don't want to expose my marriageip everybody.
[20:40] Speaker 1: Let me ask you just real quick, because some people
[20:42] Speaker 1: be like, oh, you this relationship person, why don't you
[20:44] Speaker 1: ever do interviews with your husband?
[20:46] Speaker 2: What do you say about that?
[20:47] Speaker 4: Absolutely not. This is not his lane, explained, We don't.
[20:50] Speaker 3: We My husband is not one who wants to be
[20:52] Speaker 3: talking to people and stuff and all that.
[20:54] Speaker 4: He's not you.
[20:55] Speaker 3: You lucky if you get three words out of him,
[20:57] Speaker 3: that's just not what he does. He uses his hands,
[20:59] Speaker 3: he's us other things outside of this, And so this
[21:02] Speaker 3: is my field, this is my space.
[21:04] Speaker 4: God didn't call him to this. God called me to this.
[21:06] Speaker 3: So we're gonna leave this for me unless God changing
[21:09] Speaker 3: something up, and then, you know, just to add to that,
[21:12] Speaker 3: I really just prefer to keep me, my marriage and
[21:16] Speaker 3: my husband where we are.
[21:19] Speaker 4: I don't want.
[21:20] Speaker 3: People to feel like cause people feel like I was
[21:21] Speaker 3: talking to my best friend about to say, people feel
[21:23] Speaker 3: like just because they're having an opinion that they have
[21:25] Speaker 3: a right to play God. And so people start giving
[21:28] Speaker 3: all of these opinions, Well this should have been this way,
[21:31] Speaker 3: and I don't have time for that. Plus I you know,
[21:34] Speaker 3: God still working on that part of me. I would
[21:35] Speaker 3: go back and forward with you behind my marriage. Just
[21:37] Speaker 3: go ahead and mind your business. Now, I'm serious telling that.
[21:41] Speaker 1: Does you have to tell you like getting chilled? These
[21:44] Speaker 1: people don't matter like that all the time. So how
[21:47] Speaker 1: is this temperament?
[21:48] Speaker 3: He's actually really cool, temperate compared to be. My husband's like,
[21:51] Speaker 3: don't worry about those people, because you have to understand,
[21:53] Speaker 3: like when you keep hearing opinions about yourself and you
[21:56] Speaker 3: keep hearing these stink pieces and stuff, it will get
[21:58] Speaker 3: to you. And he's like, don't don't let they get you.
[22:00] Speaker 3: Stop going to comment, stop worrying about that. You do
[22:02] Speaker 3: what you're supposed to be doing, and let's just keep
[22:04] Speaker 3: this bob, just keep it rolling. And so I take
[22:07] Speaker 3: take in and where my husband says, how.
[22:09] Speaker 2: Do you handle not letting that affect your marriage?
[22:11] Speaker 1: Because you'll have people like especially on reality shows. They're
[22:14] Speaker 1: going to reality shows and I don't know the condition
[22:17] Speaker 1: of their relationship, but they don't be divorced.
[22:18] Speaker 2: They'd be actually married. And then the people in.
[22:21] Speaker 1: The comments start saying stuff, I don't know what happens
[22:23] Speaker 1: behind the scenes, but by the next season they divorce.
[22:26] Speaker 1: And so how do you not allow that to infiltrate
[22:30] Speaker 1: your marriage and be able to use your skill set
[22:32] Speaker 1: as a counselor use your submission to your husband who's
[22:35] Speaker 1: wisdom and be like, baby, don't worry about that.
[22:38] Speaker 4: How do you balance I'm going to be honest with you.
[22:40] Speaker 3: A lot of this took me to go into deep
[22:41] Speaker 3: pray and talk to God about this, because at one
[22:44] Speaker 3: point with me counseling couples, the things that I would
[22:46] Speaker 3: hear would be just so disheartening, so sad. It's just
[22:52] Speaker 3: I would hear so many things, and I will see
[22:54] Speaker 3: the impact and that would sit on me and I
[22:57] Speaker 3: would take it home and then there would be this
[22:59] Speaker 3: distance or me being quiet because I'm now thinking could
[23:03] Speaker 3: you possibly do this to me? But We've had to
[23:06] Speaker 3: have conversations about that. He's like, baby, that's not me.
[23:09] Speaker 3: That's not going to happen. But what I started doing. However,
[23:12] Speaker 3: is when I talk to God about it is I
[23:14] Speaker 3: have to sit and release what's not mine. If it's
[23:16] Speaker 3: something that's out of my control, even if it's my
[23:19] Speaker 3: clients and my couples I work with, surrender that to God.
[23:22] Speaker 5: To God.
[23:22] Speaker 3: Remember to separate that it's not you, that's their situation. Yes,
[23:26] Speaker 3: I've called you to counsel them, but this is not
[23:29] Speaker 3: your situation and you can't allow that to go home
[23:31] Speaker 3: with you because.
[23:32] Speaker 4: It will, it will.
[23:33] Speaker 2: How long did it take? How long to be married?
[23:35] Speaker 4: I've been married for three years now.
[23:37] Speaker 2: Three years?
[23:37] Speaker 1: How long did you get to the place where you
[23:39] Speaker 1: was like, I can't carry this stuff home into my marriage.
[23:42] Speaker 2: What year was that where you had that breakthrough?
[23:44] Speaker 3: I want to say that was probably beout a year ago.
[23:46] Speaker 3: That was probably about a year ago. Yeah, it was
[23:48] Speaker 3: probably about a year ago because I heard a really
[23:52] Speaker 3: horrible story and it really set on me. And I
[23:56] Speaker 3: think that one sat on me for probably about a week. Yeah,
[23:59] Speaker 3: it really sat o session. Yeah, you hear some really
[24:01] Speaker 3: horrible things sometimes, and so when you see people go
[24:04] Speaker 3: through the emotions and then you see people get angry
[24:08] Speaker 3: at each other in the sessions and stuff, you and
[24:10] Speaker 3: I'm trying to help counsel them.
[24:11] Speaker 4: I work through that. It can sit on you.
[24:14] Speaker 2: See.
[24:14] Speaker 1: That's the reason why I couldn't do therapy like that,
[24:17] Speaker 1: be a counselor, because I'm very much an impath.
[24:19] Speaker 2: I'm gonna carry your stuff.
[24:20] Speaker 1: I'm just I'm an intercessor by nature, and so I
[24:23] Speaker 1: feel that stuff and I'd just be.
[24:25] Speaker 2: Like, You'd be like, what is wrong with you? Terairs
[24:27] Speaker 2: they was doing.
[24:28] Speaker 1: I mean, I used to do prison ministry and I
[24:31] Speaker 1: used to work with the kids at George Beto not
[24:33] Speaker 1: George Beto, but George Beto is the other prison thing,
[24:38] Speaker 1: but whatever is off of thirty. I used to go
[24:40] Speaker 1: into juvenile TENSI cent and work with the boys every
[24:43] Speaker 1: Sunday and go have Bible study with them. And I
[24:45] Speaker 1: remember the first time I walked in there. This was
[24:47] Speaker 1: years ago. Man I walked in there and I started
[24:49] Speaker 1: hearing their stories and stuff that they did. Man I
[24:52] Speaker 1: walked out. I took the stairs, not the elevator, so
[24:54] Speaker 1: I could sit in the stairwell and cry. I was like,
[24:57] Speaker 1: I want to take them all home with me. I
[24:59] Speaker 1: want to go help them all. And they told me this,
[25:01] Speaker 1: They said, the kids that you see in here. If
[25:04] Speaker 1: you were to see him on the street, you can't
[25:05] Speaker 1: speak to him. You can't say I remember you in
[25:07] Speaker 1: this he said, even if they can't come up to
[25:09] Speaker 1: you and say, hey, I remember I met you, you know,
[25:13] Speaker 1: in Julie and begin talk to you, be like I
[25:16] Speaker 1: don't remember you. I said, what I got to actually
[25:19] Speaker 1: this own them act like I don't know. Said, yes,
[25:22] Speaker 1: you cannot act like you know them outside that, I said,
[25:25] Speaker 1: I still necessary where I was crying because this one
[25:28] Speaker 1: boy told me this. I had reached them in that
[25:30] Speaker 1: one conversation. He said, Man, he said, when I get
[25:33] Speaker 1: out of here, can I can you mentor me? And
[25:36] Speaker 1: I said I can't. And he was like, I ain't
[25:40] Speaker 1: gonna do nothing but end up back in here anyway,
[25:42] Speaker 1: because I ain't nobody helping me.
[25:44] Speaker 2: Oh, I was gone, Lord is gone.
[25:47] Speaker 1: And the way he got in there is because his
[25:50] Speaker 1: mom was getting beat up by her boyfriend and he
[25:53] Speaker 1: jumped in and beat the beat the dude up, and
[25:56] Speaker 1: she called the police on him.
[25:57] Speaker 2: He got locked up.
[25:59] Speaker 1: So he told me, he's like, he's like, man, if
[26:00] Speaker 1: I get back out there, I say, I ain't got nobody.
[26:02] Speaker 1: That's a good influence. He said, I'm gonna end up
[26:05] Speaker 1: right back in here now when that's there. Well, who
[26:07] Speaker 1: God help I was you know what.
[26:09] Speaker 3: You're saying something about intercession. I didn't realize how those
[26:12] Speaker 3: go hand in hand. Yeah, because I'm an innecessor yep,
[26:15] Speaker 3: So I didn't realize how that goes hand in hand.
[26:17] Speaker 3: And now I'm thinking about it's like, huh.
[26:20] Speaker 1: Because you have to carry it in order to intercede.
[26:22] Speaker 1: You gotta first become one with their problem or issue.
[26:24] Speaker 1: You carry it, and then you have to release it.
[26:27] Speaker 1: But if you can't carry it and you don't feel it,
[26:29] Speaker 1: then you just be like God help them, and it's
[26:31] Speaker 1: more external. But when you're able to hear people stuff
[26:34] Speaker 1: and you feel the weight of it, that's how you're
[26:36] Speaker 1: able to prophetically break through through people.
[26:39] Speaker 2: Because you say I can carry it.
[26:40] Speaker 1: It's operating in the spirit of how Jesus Christ he
[26:43] Speaker 1: bore our sins.
[26:44] Speaker 2: He took it, and then he carried it and then
[26:46] Speaker 2: he released it.
[26:47] Speaker 1: And so what God does is he uses people like
[26:50] Speaker 1: you and me to be able to say, all right,
[26:52] Speaker 1: you can hear somebody's situation and not be so detached
[26:55] Speaker 1: from it.
[26:55] Speaker 2: You can carry that, bad boy. But the struggle is
[26:58] Speaker 2: to be able to.
[26:58] Speaker 1: Release it, because my problem was I'll carry it and
[27:01] Speaker 1: then I'll try to fix it.
[27:02] Speaker 3: You know what's crazy is if someone's talking to me
[27:05] Speaker 3: right now, better situation they're going through. I don't think
[27:07] Speaker 3: it has the same impact as if when God wakes
[27:09] Speaker 3: me up in the middle of the night and put
[27:11] Speaker 3: someone on my spirit and then I have to go
[27:13] Speaker 3: and pray for them, because that has happened so many times,
[27:16] Speaker 3: and I've had to explain, like even in the studies,
[27:19] Speaker 3: because once I it's once I put it out there
[27:22] Speaker 3: that I'm an indecessor. Oh that just I head so
[27:25] Speaker 3: many prayer requests. I'm like, hey, hey, hey, okay, I'm
[27:28] Speaker 3: holy spirit led. But what I what I realized is
[27:31] Speaker 3: that whenever God places someone on my spirit, he'll sign
[27:34] Speaker 3: someone to me and He's waken me up, wake me
[27:36] Speaker 3: up through that throughout the night, on praying in a day,
[27:38] Speaker 3: or just anything that He's instructed me to do.
[27:40] Speaker 4: That's when it gets to me.
[27:41] Speaker 3: That is I try to explain to people interceding, any
[27:45] Speaker 3: type of intercession, is physically draining. Yes, it is physically draining,
[27:50] Speaker 3: and you may think we're just in a physical but
[27:52] Speaker 3: we're also in the spirit as well, and so I
[27:54] Speaker 3: don't think people fully understand that. When I was speaking
[27:57] Speaker 3: in tongues in the spirit, that was one of those moments.
[28:00] Speaker 3: That was probably one of the moments where I was like,
[28:01] Speaker 3: God just really opened my eyes. The Holy Spirit was
[28:04] Speaker 3: just moving. I was on fire, and he had me
[28:06] Speaker 3: going to the spirit and I was interceding. I was
[28:08] Speaker 3: spreaking in tongues. And then what I felt and what
[28:11] Speaker 3: I knew God was telling me to do was call
[28:12] Speaker 3: that to other intercessors. And my mom told me she
[28:15] Speaker 3: was praying in that same exact moment for the person
[28:17] Speaker 3: we were praying for, and that person had a breakthrough,
[28:19] Speaker 3: and I thank God for that. But that was, as
[28:22] Speaker 3: you said, it's like wow. And it's crazy because even
[28:24] Speaker 3: before that, when I kept feeling her in my spirit,
[28:27] Speaker 3: my mom we were sitting in the office and she
[28:30] Speaker 3: was telling me. She was like, are you okay? Because
[28:31] Speaker 3: I was pacing back and forth. I'm like, something's wrong.
[28:33] Speaker 3: I'm like, why do I feel grief right now? And
[28:36] Speaker 3: it was because she was about to do something that
[28:37] Speaker 3: was going to grieve the spirit, and God was like,
[28:40] Speaker 3: she is going to end up losing her salvation, And
[28:43] Speaker 3: I mean I was feeling every emotion she was going through.
[28:46] Speaker 3: I was feeling grief, and it was just it was
[28:49] Speaker 3: a long couple of days. It was a long couple
[28:51] Speaker 3: of days. It was a long couple of days. You
[28:53] Speaker 3: know it's serious when you start fasting for somebody. It
[28:56] Speaker 3: was a long couple of days.
[28:58] Speaker 1: It was let us back up, So how did you meet?
[29:02] Speaker 1: We ain't gonna talk about your first husband, not that
[29:05] Speaker 1: I don't care about. I'm just I don't care about.
[29:07] Speaker 1: So how did you meet? And I love when I
[29:09] Speaker 1: have couples on there because they always have two different
[29:12] Speaker 1: stories about how they met each other, and so you.
[29:14] Speaker 2: Get to win. He don't get the chance to defend
[29:16] Speaker 2: you know his story. So how did y'all meet?
[29:19] Speaker 4: We met in reed middle school. Yeah, readA duck.
[29:24] Speaker 3: We met were thirteen years old. Really, Yeah, We've been
[29:26] Speaker 3: knowing each other since we were thirteen. Wow, have never dated.
[29:29] Speaker 3: We've always been really fond of each other's friends, having
[29:32] Speaker 3: a good time, met his family, things like that. We
[29:34] Speaker 3: would go to like people's parties and stuff and all
[29:36] Speaker 3: that together over the years. What was happening was because
[29:41] Speaker 3: like I said, it was a friendship. He would call
[29:43] Speaker 3: me at random times while I was in the midst
[29:46] Speaker 3: of a problem, like my tire is flat, my break
[29:49] Speaker 3: life just went out, something is going on, and he
[29:51] Speaker 3: would just randomly call me and were like, hey, what
[29:53] Speaker 3: you doing.
[29:54] Speaker 4: I'm like, I have a flat right now.
[29:56] Speaker 3: And instead of him saying do you have somebody to
[29:58] Speaker 3: help you, it was always sending your location, seem me
[30:00] Speaker 3: where you are. He would go and get the tools.
[30:02] Speaker 3: He will always make sure that he looked out for me.
[30:05] Speaker 3: And we still kept it at a friendship, right, but
[30:08] Speaker 3: we knew we had feelings, but we kept at a friendship.
[30:10] Speaker 3: You know, a lot of times you don't want to
[30:12] Speaker 3: lose that friendship. And then there was some time, you know,
[30:15] Speaker 3: where he dated people and I dated people and stuff
[30:18] Speaker 3: like that. And the last guy that I was actually dating,
[30:21] Speaker 3: God made sure that I ended it with him. He
[30:24] Speaker 3: made sure, when I tell you, he showed me every
[30:27] Speaker 3: bad thing about that person.
[30:29] Speaker 4: He made sure that I did.
[30:30] Speaker 3: And it was crazy because immediately when I cut it
[30:32] Speaker 3: off with that guy, immediately then here comes my husband.
[30:36] Speaker 3: I made a video and I had posted and he's
[30:38] Speaker 3: in the comments and he's like, I have all of
[30:40] Speaker 3: those qualities. And I was like, oh, is that what
[30:45] Speaker 3: you did?
[30:46] Speaker 4: Yeah?
[30:49] Speaker 3: And so I was like, but mind you, I haven't
[30:52] Speaker 3: spoken to him in a while, and I was like lose.
[30:54] Speaker 3: And then we were texting and he's like, hey, you
[30:56] Speaker 3: want to hang out?
[30:57] Speaker 2: In the comments?
[30:58] Speaker 3: Yeah, he was like I have all those all these
[31:01] Speaker 3: green flags, and I was like, lo even still in
[31:03] Speaker 3: my mind we're friends, and so he was like, hey,
[31:06] Speaker 3: you want to hang out. We never hung out the
[31:07] Speaker 3: way that we did that weekend. It was a very
[31:10] Speaker 3: intimate hangout, like we were just going to like different
[31:12] Speaker 3: stores and furniture places and going out to eat, and
[31:14] Speaker 3: then we ended up having a dance off in a
[31:16] Speaker 3: parking lot.
[31:17] Speaker 4: He spin me around.
[31:18] Speaker 3: We were acting like children, just having a good time.
[31:22] Speaker 3: And then of course there was some time because I
[31:24] Speaker 3: think he got a little scared. I think he was like,
[31:26] Speaker 3: hold on, I'm this is deep feelings, and I know
[31:28] Speaker 3: your past used to play off in your past, and
[31:30] Speaker 3: he was like.
[31:31] Speaker 4: You know, I don't really know. I wasn't a savage,
[31:35] Speaker 4: you know, you thought he was going to take.
[31:38] Speaker 3: And then just yeah, And so I told him. I
[31:41] Speaker 3: was like, all right, I don't have time for this.
[31:42] Speaker 3: And my best friend had came to Dallas, and I
[31:45] Speaker 3: was like and he had hit me up. I said no,
[31:47] Speaker 3: because you you doing that same thing that ghosts and thinking.
[31:49] Speaker 3: He was like, I'm sorry. I just he was like,
[31:52] Speaker 3: we've just been going through it. Can we hang out?
[31:53] Speaker 4: I said no.
[31:54] Speaker 3: I said, I'm about to go to at home to
[31:56] Speaker 3: find these pictures. And then the next day he calls
[31:59] Speaker 3: me and he's like, hey, what you doing. I said,
[32:01] Speaker 3: I'm at sam trying to find me an office share
[32:03] Speaker 3: and he was like, okay. He pulls up to my
[32:05] Speaker 3: office because he had the location to my office. He
[32:07] Speaker 3: pulls up, he comes, I'm in the car. Me and
[32:09] Speaker 3: my best friend are still in the car. He goes,
[32:11] Speaker 3: opens up the trunk, gets the chair out. He takes
[32:13] Speaker 3: it up to my office, breaks out his tools and
[32:16] Speaker 3: he was a no, he ain't reading no instructions. He
[32:18] Speaker 3: just puting the chair together. He puts it together and
[32:20] Speaker 3: I tell my best friend. She over there sitting on
[32:22] Speaker 3: my couch in the office.
[32:23] Speaker 4: I said, h. I said, I love it.
[32:26] Speaker 2: Man.
[32:26] Speaker 4: I can use his hands. I said okay, h. And
[32:30] Speaker 4: he was like, he said, I want to go to
[32:32] Speaker 4: saw Grass. You want to come?
[32:33] Speaker 3: I said, if you don't send me the location when
[32:36] Speaker 3: you go to Sawgrass. I'm not coming. I said, I'm
[32:38] Speaker 3: not going to play with you this time. He got
[32:40] Speaker 3: the sawgrass and send me the location immediately, and I
[32:43] Speaker 3: showed it to my best friend. She said, hmm, he
[32:44] Speaker 3: did right. And then we've just been hitting it off
[32:47] Speaker 3: ever since. And then I had a photo shoot. And
[32:50] Speaker 3: at that photo shoot, I had on a pink dress
[32:51] Speaker 3: and I was taking a shoot. I was looking outside
[32:53] Speaker 3: of the window and he said it was that moment
[32:56] Speaker 3: and he said, right there, he said, that's my wife.
[32:58] Speaker 3: And he told me after that, he said, when you
[33:00] Speaker 3: looking at the window, I said, that's my wife.
[33:02] Speaker 1: So how much time had from the day that y'all
[33:04] Speaker 1: started giving y'allself a chance romantically? How long was that
[33:08] Speaker 1: to the moment he said that's my wife.
[33:11] Speaker 3: I don't even think that was a month. Really, I'm serious.
[33:14] Speaker 3: I don't think that was a month. I don't think
[33:16] Speaker 3: that it was. When you know, you know when you know.
[33:19] Speaker 3: And I knew for a fact because I know how
[33:22] Speaker 3: God is with me. I knew for a fact, and
[33:24] Speaker 3: based off the conversations that I had with God as well,
[33:26] Speaker 3: I knew for a fact that was my husband. And
[33:28] Speaker 3: that's the reason why God has always made sure we
[33:31] Speaker 3: stayed in each other's life. That's the reason why. And
[33:34] Speaker 3: like I said, he reminded me so much of my grandfather,
[33:36] Speaker 3: and my grandfather's my heart. He reminded me so much
[33:39] Speaker 3: of my grandfather. It was just always I'm gonna take
[33:42] Speaker 3: care of you. You don't worry about nothing.
[33:44] Speaker 4: I have it.
[33:44] Speaker 3: It was never a moment of do you need were you?
[33:47] Speaker 3: It just was always He's taken care of it. And
[33:50] Speaker 3: so I was like, oh, yeah, I knew it.
[33:52] Speaker 1: So the moment where he was being funny acting and
[33:55] Speaker 1: was ghosting you, had you started getting your emotions caught
[33:58] Speaker 1: up and didn't tell him so watch you, so watch you?
[34:02] Speaker 2: So why did it bother you so much?
[34:03] Speaker 4: Because that's my friend?
[34:05] Speaker 3: That was my friend, And like, I feel like we
[34:07] Speaker 3: were cool enough to be able to have that conversation
[34:10] Speaker 3: and it's like, don't start getting quiet. And I just
[34:14] Speaker 3: the way that that day was, well, I guess you
[34:17] Speaker 3: could say, yeah, I get the weight that day was. Yeah,
[34:19] Speaker 3: you're right, the way that day was it was something different.
[34:22] Speaker 3: We've never experienced that, and I guess I just saw
[34:25] Speaker 3: him differently then, So.
[34:25] Speaker 2: Yeah, you're right.
[34:26] Speaker 1: So when he pulled back at that moment, he was like,
[34:28] Speaker 1: now listen because that that probably was a trauma part
[34:32] Speaker 1: for your trigger. It's like saying, now you're trying to
[34:34] Speaker 1: abandon me, that I deal with this little abandonment issue
[34:37] Speaker 1: that I may have dealt with with my father. And
[34:39] Speaker 1: so now here we are in this moment, you don't
[34:41] Speaker 1: abandon me and took me over here.
[34:43] Speaker 4: Didn't go all the way back to my dad. He
[34:45] Speaker 4: didn't go that far.
[34:46] Speaker 3: But it was just you know, you live through life
[34:48] Speaker 3: and you know exactly what you don't want it what
[34:50] Speaker 3: you're not going to tolerate. And that was big for me.
[34:52] Speaker 3: I am big on communication. You concept to just talk
[34:54] Speaker 3: to me about it. You can say, hey, I'm going
[34:56] Speaker 3: through something. I'll talk to you later, all right.
[34:58] Speaker 4: Cool.
[34:58] Speaker 1: Because he had gone back to friend ship at that moment, platonic.
[35:01] Speaker 1: Oh yeah, so where y'all got to. He could have
[35:04] Speaker 1: just said, okay, I only see you as a friend
[35:06] Speaker 1: and you've been okay with it.
[35:07] Speaker 3: I still would have been his friend. Yeah, that's how
[35:09] Speaker 3: much respect I have on I said it would have
[35:11] Speaker 3: been his friend.
[35:12] Speaker 2: That's how much respect I have for him.
[35:14] Speaker 4: I have a lot of respect for him. I always have.
[35:16] Speaker 2: Why is that important.
[35:18] Speaker 4: Oh, respect is significant to me. I want to say
[35:22] Speaker 4: that respect for me.
[35:25] Speaker 3: Is important because I feel as though when you respect
[35:28] Speaker 3: the person, you honor that person as well. Yes, and
[35:31] Speaker 3: when you honor that person, you delight in that person.
[35:33] Speaker 3: And specifically for my spouse, I respect him, I honor him,
[35:36] Speaker 3: and I delight in my spouse.
[35:38] Speaker 1: Hold on, now, I ain't never heard nobody say I
[35:40] Speaker 1: delight in my spouse. The Bible it says it. Oh yeah,
[35:43] Speaker 1: that's a good word.
[35:44] Speaker 4: It tells you, It tells you.
[35:45] Speaker 3: So I think that's another thing that we're missing now
[35:49] Speaker 3: in marriage as well. Is delighting in your spouse and
[35:51] Speaker 3: delighting in your marriage. Make it fun, have fun. Remember
[35:54] Speaker 3: that it's so much more than circumstances and fluctuating emotions.
[35:58] Speaker 3: This is a person that you have. Use your anchor.
[36:01] Speaker 3: Always remember what your anchor. Your vows are, your ancher.
[36:03] Speaker 3: And you took these vows upon God. You stood below God,
[36:06] Speaker 3: and you say, all right, Lord, this is what we're doing.
[36:09] Speaker 3: You gave us a yes, and this is what we're doing.
[36:11] Speaker 3: And over time, things start to fade. The passion starts
[36:15] Speaker 3: to fade, the fire starts to fade. But whenever you
[36:17] Speaker 3: find a way to get back to the pure joy
[36:20] Speaker 3: of knowing that I'm serving you, the pure joy of
[36:23] Speaker 3: knowing that this marriage is not just about me and you.
[36:26] Speaker 3: We will glorifying God in this marriage. The pure joy
[36:29] Speaker 3: of knowing that we're doing this together and people are
[36:31] Speaker 3: bearing witness to our union. That's how it's easier to
[36:34] Speaker 3: delight when you do that. It's easier to do that
[36:36] Speaker 3: when you can just get back to where your anchor is.
[36:38] Speaker 3: And so that for me is important.
[36:40] Speaker 1: But this was in friendship. You said you had all
[36:42] Speaker 1: these things respect on that line.
[36:44] Speaker 3: I had all all of those things, Yes, in a friendship.
[36:46] Speaker 3: When God revealed that that was my husband, here we go.
[36:50] Speaker 3: Now we have more. But I also was able to
[36:53] Speaker 3: delight in my friendship. If I was able to delight
[36:55] Speaker 3: in my friendship with him, sure enough, I was gonna
[36:57] Speaker 3: be able to delight in my marriage.
[36:58] Speaker 2: Absolutely.
[37:00] Speaker 1: So that month of him telling you that that didn't
[37:01] Speaker 1: scare you. No, you just it was confirming to you.
[37:04] Speaker 3: It's scared me because I had talked to God about it.
[37:07] Speaker 3: I'm gonna talk to God. I'm not a person who
[37:09] Speaker 3: was gonna say I'm gonna do what I want to do.
[37:10] Speaker 3: And then talk God. I did that in the past.
[37:13] Speaker 3: That's a problem. We use God as a last resource,
[37:16] Speaker 3: and so we're not gonna do that. Let me talk
[37:18] Speaker 3: to you about it, because I can't make this mistake
[37:20] Speaker 3: over again. So let me have this conversation. And that
[37:23] Speaker 3: was a conversation I had, And when God revealed it,
[37:25] Speaker 3: I said, okay, my hands are So that.
[37:27] Speaker 2: Came before the photo shoot, that conversation with God.
[37:30] Speaker 4: No, they came immediately after the photoshoot.
[37:32] Speaker 1: So when he said that to you, did you talk
[37:35] Speaker 1: to God? And God said.
[37:36] Speaker 4: Yes, I had to talk to God about it.
[37:38] Speaker 2: Did you did you relate that back to him quickly?
[37:40] Speaker 2: Did you do that?
[37:41] Speaker 3: I'm just kind of because I know him and God
[37:43] Speaker 3: got their own conversations.
[37:44] Speaker 1: M h.
[37:45] Speaker 3: I just watched to see how he was going to move.
[37:49] Speaker 3: But I had already had that coming now. Of course,
[37:50] Speaker 3: later on we had that conversation. But exactly after that, No,
[37:54] Speaker 3: I took some time.
[37:56] Speaker 2: How long did it take you to tell him? I
[37:58] Speaker 2: know God told him this thing.
[38:01] Speaker 3: It didn't take me long at all. Everything kind of
[38:03] Speaker 3: happened rapidly. Everything happened within a six months spiel.
[38:07] Speaker 2: So six months I got married in six months.
[38:08] Speaker 3: Everything happened within a six months Spiel a little over
[38:14] Speaker 3: six months. But as far as like, as far as
[38:16] Speaker 3: like relationship and stuff and all that, that was within
[38:18] Speaker 3: the six months, and you were and you.
[38:20] Speaker 1: Were, no past triggers popped up, no whatever, y'all, y'all
[38:25] Speaker 1: were just good, y'all. Was just this is what I'm
[38:29] Speaker 1: marrying my best friend.
[38:31] Speaker 4: It was no past trigger.
[38:31] Speaker 3: It needs to be in past triggers when you when
[38:33] Speaker 3: you really surrender something to God. For me specifically, I
[38:37] Speaker 3: speak to myself when you fully surrender something to God.
[38:40] Speaker 3: Of course, you may have moments where it comes back up.
[38:42] Speaker 3: When you keep daily surrendering this to God, eventually he'll
[38:45] Speaker 3: take it away. And because I had done so much
[38:48] Speaker 3: work on myself, there was not many triggers that would
[38:51] Speaker 3: start to show up because I can't allow those things
[38:53] Speaker 3: to have agency over me. These are experiences that I've
[38:56] Speaker 3: had before. I had a lot of woundedness and a
[38:58] Speaker 3: lot of voice that I was trying to feel, and
[39:00] Speaker 3: I wasn't in that place anymore. So it wasn't a
[39:03] Speaker 3: need for me to be loved or anything like that.
[39:05] Speaker 3: It's okay however it goes. But my trust was in God.
[39:08] Speaker 3: Specifically in that moment and everything after that, and even
[39:12] Speaker 3: before that, my trust was in God. So when God
[39:14] Speaker 3: told me to let the other guy alone, leave him alone,
[39:17] Speaker 3: he is not for you.
[39:18] Speaker 4: I was obedient to that. Now he har you no
[39:21] Speaker 4: with that person.
[39:22] Speaker 3: He said no, because God really revealed everything.
[39:26] Speaker 2: And I have to ask all the reason why he
[39:28] Speaker 2: wasn't trying to find no closures.
[39:30] Speaker 3: I saw everything. I saw everything. Mind you, like I said,
[39:33] Speaker 3: I see. So when I tell you God revealed this
[39:35] Speaker 3: is not just physical revelations. It's a spiritual revelation as well.
[39:38] Speaker 3: And it's like, Okay, I got it.
[39:40] Speaker 4: Bye.
[39:41] Speaker 3: And then right when I said goodbye to that person,
[39:43] Speaker 3: I'm telling you it happened to meet it.
[39:46] Speaker 4: I said, Oh, look at that, it was great. Yes,
[39:50] Speaker 4: thank God.
[39:51] Speaker 1: So when you look back at that, why do you
[39:53] Speaker 1: think it was so important for you to meet your
[39:56] Speaker 1: husband when you did?
[39:58] Speaker 4: Why do I think that it was so important for
[39:59] Speaker 4: me to meet him when I did?
[40:02] Speaker 1: Because think about it, you could have win and start
[40:03] Speaker 1: serving purpose doing the stuff that you're doing now. Then
[40:06] Speaker 1: beat him on the road meet him later. But God,
[40:09] Speaker 1: when you look at look back hindsight being twenty twenty,
[40:11] Speaker 1: you met him right after closing the door on the
[40:15] Speaker 1: other guy, and then he comes into your life. What
[40:17] Speaker 1: was going on in your life tied to purpose? You
[40:20] Speaker 1: were were you're in school doing therapy or what with
[40:23] Speaker 1: what we're doing at the time.
[40:25] Speaker 3: I was actually counseling about then, So you were counseling. Yeah,
[40:27] Speaker 3: I was counseling at that point. I really feel like
[40:32] Speaker 3: in order for me to be able, in order for
[40:35] Speaker 3: me to be able to really live out the purpose
[40:38] Speaker 3: that God had for me, I needed my husband with me.
[40:41] Speaker 3: I did you notice he's always with me? Yeah, like
[40:44] Speaker 3: he really is. He's that support that I needed. But
[40:48] Speaker 3: also people needed to be able to witness a God's
[40:52] Speaker 3: centered marriage and that is important. So if I'm gonna
[40:54] Speaker 3: go out here ministering, especially in marriage ministering, people need
[40:58] Speaker 3: to be able to see exactly what it means to
[41:00] Speaker 3: keep God at the center of your marriage.
[41:02] Speaker 4: What does that look like in conflict?
[41:04] Speaker 3: What does that look like when things start to fade,
[41:06] Speaker 3: What does that look like when things start to change?
[41:08] Speaker 3: They need to be able to see that. But also
[41:10] Speaker 3: I needed to be nurtured as well on this walk,
[41:13] Speaker 3: because when you are doing ministry, it can take so
[41:16] Speaker 3: much out of you. And so to be able to
[41:18] Speaker 3: have that support who can nurture you and nurture your
[41:21] Speaker 3: spirit as well is a good thing. So I feel
[41:23] Speaker 3: like God orchestrated, I know, God orchestrated everything the way
[41:26] Speaker 3: that it needed to be orchestrated, because it just it
[41:29] Speaker 3: really just helped and the impact was so much greater
[41:31] Speaker 3: as well.
[41:33] Speaker 2: Six months.
[41:34] Speaker 3: Yeah, it was pretty fast. It was pretty fast, but
[41:37] Speaker 3: we knew, so I wasn't really worried about it.
[41:39] Speaker 1: But also helped y'all know each other since middle school.
[41:41] Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I mean it's like, yeah, you marry and
[41:44] Speaker 1: your best friend, And that's what I say with people,
[41:46] Speaker 1: if you build a solid friendship. Studies show that if
[41:49] Speaker 1: you built from a solid friendship, your marriage is gonna last.
[41:52] Speaker 1: I mean, that's where you really get to to death Dew.
[41:54] Speaker 2: We part.
[41:54] Speaker 1: It's because y'all really, just like you said, when the
[41:58] Speaker 1: communication got a little if he during that little season,
[42:01] Speaker 1: you was like, now, come on, we better than that.
[42:03] Speaker 1: We can talk about it. If you're not feeling me
[42:05] Speaker 1: like that, no more.
[42:06] Speaker 2: Let's talk about it.
[42:07] Speaker 1: If you're a little nervous about this, let's talk about
[42:09] Speaker 1: if you got your heart involved, you're scary, which happens
[42:11] Speaker 1: with a lot of men. When men really feel like
[42:14] Speaker 1: that's the one, they'd be like, if this girl can
[42:17] Speaker 1: hurt me, she can hurt me real bad. I'm telling
[42:20] Speaker 1: you in my life, I'm telling you it will make
[42:23] Speaker 1: you sit there and be like, if I put myself
[42:25] Speaker 1: out there and it's not mutual, man, I done messed
[42:29] Speaker 1: up because I really want this person.
[42:30] Speaker 3: But you know what, I do believe that that set
[42:32] Speaker 3: the tone for our marriage as well, because I was
[42:34] Speaker 3: so big on communication and he told me that before
[42:37] Speaker 3: he feels safe enough to be able to talk to
[42:39] Speaker 3: me about certain things. I'm big on us communicating, and
[42:42] Speaker 3: it's going to be respectful. I want to be able
[42:44] Speaker 3: to hear you. I don't want you to feel like
[42:45] Speaker 3: I'm the only voice in this marriage. You have a
[42:47] Speaker 3: voice too, And I feel like that definitely set the
[42:50] Speaker 3: tone because whenever we speak to each other, we pay
[42:51] Speaker 3: attention to our tone or attitudes, how we approaching things
[42:54] Speaker 3: like that, so we're able to really talk talk through things.
[42:57] Speaker 3: We don't have conflict like that because we talk through it.
[43:00] Speaker 3: So I feel like a lot of those things, just
[43:01] Speaker 3: like how things played out when I look at it,
[43:03] Speaker 3: that was god like piecing everything together, like, oh, you,
[43:06] Speaker 3: I gotta wrap back that. I've taken care of that already.
[43:08] Speaker 3: I really do believe. So I believe God put us
[43:11] Speaker 3: together for a reason.
[43:12] Speaker 1: What did he say to you when he saw God
[43:14] Speaker 1: taking you to another level, saying that now you're finna
[43:17] Speaker 1: start touring, You're about to do all this stuff. Your
[43:19] Speaker 1: voice is about to be amplified on stages. What was
[43:22] Speaker 1: that conversation like?
[43:24] Speaker 4: It was just full support. That's really just what it was.
[43:27] Speaker 2: Like.
[43:27] Speaker 3: He is very supportive. It was just full support. Whatever
[43:30] Speaker 3: you need from me, I'm here. That was all that
[43:33] Speaker 3: it is. It's just always been full of support. He
[43:35] Speaker 3: was always he was just always with me. He had
[43:37] Speaker 3: already seen me online, you know, getting attraction. But of
[43:40] Speaker 3: course when the tour came, by that time I think
[43:43] Speaker 3: I had Yeah, I went to Dayton and I did
[43:45] Speaker 3: the studio and then after that they asked me to
[43:47] Speaker 3: come on tour. Yeah, but then I got pregnant, so
[43:50] Speaker 3: I couldn't go on that tour and has a way
[43:52] Speaker 3: to the next tour. But he has that wrong with that,
[43:57] Speaker 3: But it was it was full support. I thank God
[44:00] Speaker 3: for this specifically though, is I come from marriages and
[44:03] Speaker 3: he come from marriages too. His grandparents were married for
[44:05] Speaker 3: a very long time, very very very long time. His
[44:09] Speaker 3: grandfather passed and his grandmother recently just passed. But he
[44:13] Speaker 3: came from being able to k He was able to
[44:16] Speaker 3: see a very healthy marriage and a fruitful marriage too.
[44:21] Speaker 3: And then my side of the family is full of marriages,
[44:24] Speaker 3: so we were able to bring that together as well.
[44:27] Speaker 3: I've always known marriage my whole life. That's why I
[44:28] Speaker 3: advocate for marriage so much, because I've seen it. I
[44:31] Speaker 3: was a little girl who was nosy, and so when
[44:33] Speaker 3: I was not supposed to be.
[44:34] Speaker 2: In a room with her doorsations.
[44:36] Speaker 4: Exactly, I was speaking around the corner. I was nosy.
[44:38] Speaker 3: I was always in somebody else's business, and so I
[44:41] Speaker 3: would hear certain conversations, certain conversations I probably should have
[44:44] Speaker 3: never heard. But it also helped me see how people
[44:47] Speaker 3: came back together. And so I was able to witness that, Yeah,
[44:49] Speaker 3: they get mad at each other, but their marriage and
[44:52] Speaker 3: they honored their marriage. But it's not even honored their marriage.
[44:54] Speaker 3: Because I come from a background Kojic background specifically, and
[44:58] Speaker 3: we were rooted in the word, I was able to
[45:00] Speaker 3: see God bring and restore marriages, and so that's what
[45:03] Speaker 3: I learned.
[45:04] Speaker 4: I learned.
[45:04] Speaker 3: Of course, my family has always taught me that God
[45:06] Speaker 3: is the creator of marriage. So if God is the
[45:08] Speaker 3: creative marriage, he can restore marriage as well. He can
[45:11] Speaker 3: give grace in the mess, and he can give power
[45:13] Speaker 3: for a miracle. And so I've always learned that from
[45:16] Speaker 3: my family, So I carried that and so whenever I
[45:19] Speaker 3: even in my marriage and when I'm working with people
[45:21] Speaker 3: in their marriages or even just speaking to married couples,
[45:23] Speaker 3: it's like God can restore, but you have to put
[45:25] Speaker 3: full trust in him.
[45:26] Speaker 4: You have to be able to trust God.
[45:29] Speaker 3: But a lot of people struggle with trusting God that
[45:31] Speaker 3: part because you can't see what.
[45:32] Speaker 4: He's gonna do.
[45:34] Speaker 1: So you've been advocating for marriage, and your voice is amplified,
[45:39] Speaker 1: very loud, and sometimes it comes off extremely harsh. And
[45:43] Speaker 1: you said that you always pray and say God help me,
[45:46] Speaker 1: you know, tone me down. So I ain't just you know,
[45:49] Speaker 1: like this, what is that about? Why do you feel
[45:53] Speaker 1: like you go so hard when you hear people say
[45:58] Speaker 1: ignorant people to be ignorant comments that they say that
[46:02] Speaker 1: that comes against the sanctity of.
[46:04] Speaker 3: Marriage because marriage is a covenant and it irritates me.
[46:07] Speaker 3: And what happens in society now is people are escapists,
[46:11] Speaker 3: and when you have an escape plan in a marriage,
[46:13] Speaker 3: that means that you have one foot outside of the covenant,
[46:15] Speaker 3: and that is not how it's supposed to be. That
[46:17] Speaker 3: irritates me because people really do. People have distorted marriage
[46:22] Speaker 3: so much, and if it's frustrating to me, this is
[46:24] Speaker 3: a covenant that we're not going to just minimize marriage
[46:27] Speaker 3: and distort it to just simply being a contract. People
[46:30] Speaker 3: look at marriage like, Okay, I can gain something from
[46:33] Speaker 3: another person. I can get either some type of status
[46:36] Speaker 3: or finances, or because I can't handle my love for spirit,
[46:39] Speaker 3: let me just get marriage so that way I can
[46:41] Speaker 3: keep having sex with this person. And that's just not
[46:43] Speaker 3: what marriage is. And I hear so many people being
[46:47] Speaker 3: very selfish about marriage. It's about me what I want
[46:50] Speaker 3: is like, that's not what it is. We are using
[46:52] Speaker 3: marriage to advance the Kingdom of God and to glorify God.
[46:56] Speaker 4: Marriage is a covenant.
[46:57] Speaker 3: This is a binding agreement and you stood before God,
[47:00] Speaker 3: and so it's frustrating to me. I don't like when
[47:03] Speaker 3: people play about marriage because essentially you're planning about God
[47:06] Speaker 3: and I have an issue with that. I don't play
[47:08] Speaker 3: about God, and I don't want to see nobody else
[47:10] Speaker 3: play well God, this is God's creation, just like where
[47:13] Speaker 3: God's creation, Marriage is God's creation, and he knew what
[47:16] Speaker 3: he was doing when he created marriage. So let's take
[47:20] Speaker 3: it serious and let's keep it sacred. For one, that's
[47:23] Speaker 3: another thing. But I think also to add to that
[47:26] Speaker 3: point is that there's a lot of marriages that really
[47:29] Speaker 3: are not God's centered. They're not people marriage just philus
[47:34] Speaker 3: for reasons, just because they wanted to right. And that's
[47:37] Speaker 3: another issue that I have when it comes to marriage.
[47:42] Speaker 3: Let's sanctify marriage. Let's get marriage back to the sacred
[47:46] Speaker 3: space that it is. Let's do that. And so that's
[47:49] Speaker 3: the reason why I speak the way that I do.
[47:51] Speaker 3: I want marriage to be holy. God brought two imperfect,
[47:54] Speaker 3: flawed people together to make something holy. And the moment
[47:58] Speaker 3: that a person sees a flow, all they want to
[48:00] Speaker 3: run away from it. But that's not what God called
[48:02] Speaker 3: when it comes to marriage. He wants us to be
[48:04] Speaker 3: set apart, set apart from the world, set apart.
[48:07] Speaker 4: For other marriages.
[48:08] Speaker 3: People need to be able to find God in our marriage.
[48:11] Speaker 3: They need to be able to see God. We are
[48:13] Speaker 3: a living picture of Christ's relationship with the Church. So
[48:17] Speaker 3: therefore people need to be able to see it. And
[48:20] Speaker 3: so for me, from my standpoint, that's the reason why
[48:22] Speaker 3: I sanctify my marriage. You will hear me going in
[48:25] Speaker 3: the closet, Jehovah Mekadeshkian. I need you to sanctify my
[48:28] Speaker 3: marriage right now, because Lord said, I'm the Lord that sanctifies,
[48:32] Speaker 3: and so if we want to be set apart, holy
[48:34] Speaker 3: is the state. Holy is the state of being set apart.
[48:37] Speaker 3: For Christ, sanctification is the process of making things holy.
[48:40] Speaker 3: So I'm really big on calling everybody to sanctify your
[48:43] Speaker 3: marriage so you can be set apart, so we can
[48:45] Speaker 3: be utilized to fulfill God's purpose and his will as
[48:49] Speaker 3: we are designed to do. So that's why I'm big
[48:52] Speaker 3: on marriage the way that I am. I don't play
[48:53] Speaker 3: about it, but I was raised that way and I
[48:56] Speaker 3: need people to get back to what it is. How
[48:59] Speaker 3: selfish is it? How selfish? How selfish is it as
[49:04] Speaker 3: people to say that we want to live according to
[49:06] Speaker 3: our will when we have a God who has been
[49:09] Speaker 3: unchanging in his nature. That's why you heard me constantly
[49:12] Speaker 3: humming God's unchanging hand that has just been in my
[49:15] Speaker 3: spirit for two weeks now. God's nature, his character is unchanging,
[49:19] Speaker 3: his promises are unchanging. And that's our model right there
[49:23] Speaker 3: for marriage. If God will continue to love you despite
[49:26] Speaker 3: what you do to him, if God will continue to
[49:29] Speaker 3: forgive you despite the sin that you have committed, why
[49:33] Speaker 3: is it that we cannot take that model and be
[49:36] Speaker 3: unchanging in our marriage as well. But the moment we
[49:38] Speaker 3: don't feel happy, because people use marriage for personal fulfillment,
[49:41] Speaker 3: the moment we don't feel happy, we want to run.
[49:44] Speaker 3: The moment that things change, we want to run. Oh oh,
[49:46] Speaker 3: you're making less money than you did before. You want
[49:49] Speaker 3: to run. But our model says that our nature should
[49:52] Speaker 3: be unchanging. And for a minute, if love is not
[49:55] Speaker 3: there for you, then go to God about it and
[49:57] Speaker 3: tell God today I don't feel loving God, but I
[50:00] Speaker 3: know that you are love and I need you to
[50:02] Speaker 3: bring this love in me. And so what we do,
[50:05] Speaker 3: what we tip to do in marriages, is that we
[50:07] Speaker 3: fall out of love and our feelings change and stuff,
[50:10] Speaker 3: and then we try to manufacture these emotions when we
[50:12] Speaker 3: don't have to. If you take it to God, he
[50:14] Speaker 3: can help you gain that back. But people have gotten
[50:17] Speaker 3: a way from going to God. Whenever they're going through
[50:20] Speaker 3: things in their marriage, they go to social media. They
[50:23] Speaker 3: go on social media Instagram, tiktoks. You listen to people
[50:25] Speaker 3: who are bitter, You are listening to people who have
[50:28] Speaker 3: unforgiveness in their heart instead of taking that to God.
[50:31] Speaker 3: Stop using God as the last tool. Go to him first.
[50:34] Speaker 3: If you are struggling with forgiveness, you need to go
[50:36] Speaker 3: to God first. Why are you going to other people
[50:38] Speaker 3: who are telling you should not forgive that person. When
[50:41] Speaker 3: God commands us to forgive, you are supposed to forgive.
[50:45] Speaker 3: It's stuff like that that really works me up. And
[50:49] Speaker 3: in today's society, people are so unforgiving and it hurts
[50:52] Speaker 3: my heart, it really does, especially when it comes to
[50:55] Speaker 3: your spouse. You under threefold with you, your spouse and
[50:58] Speaker 3: God the sinner. And God has commanded you to forgive
[51:02] Speaker 3: because when you don't forgive, you nurture sin in your
[51:04] Speaker 3: heart and God is not pleased with that. And trust me,
[51:09] Speaker 3: God is not going to reward you for that sin
[51:11] Speaker 3: that you're protecting. And that's the reason why people be
[51:13] Speaker 3: resentful and bitter and angry and have hate towards the
[51:18] Speaker 3: spouse because that unforgiveness is sitting in their heart. And
[51:20] Speaker 3: this is the society that we live and people who
[51:22] Speaker 3: are unforgiving, and we bringing that nonsense into marriage. Let's
[51:26] Speaker 3: keep marriage what it is and stop treating it for
[51:28] Speaker 3: what it is that you want. Let's keep marriage of
[51:30] Speaker 3: what it is. It's sacred, it's separate from everybody else
[51:33] Speaker 3: for a reason. Let's get back to what marriage is.
[51:37] Speaker 3: Let's get back to using our marriage to be able
[51:39] Speaker 3: to help the community, to serve others, to serve the people,
[51:43] Speaker 3: to serve who God has called us. Let's use marriage
[51:46] Speaker 3: for that reason again. But people have not been doing that,
[51:50] Speaker 3: and it hurts my heart while we treating marriage like
[51:53] Speaker 3: it's everything else in this world. It's the reason why
[51:56] Speaker 3: God called man a woman together. He knew what he
[51:58] Speaker 3: was doing. We didn't know what he was doing. He
[52:00] Speaker 3: knew what he was doing. So that's I'm just really
[52:03] Speaker 3: big on marriage.
[52:04] Speaker 4: I love marriage. That's my ministry for reason.
[52:07] Speaker 2: I just let you cook. I want you to cook.
[52:11] Speaker 3: That's my ministry for a reason. And I just want
[52:14] Speaker 3: people to get back to God. That's my biggest thing.
[52:18] Speaker 3: I want you to get back to God. And that's
[52:20] Speaker 3: why I love my marriage. Because my marriage when people
[52:23] Speaker 3: see it, my friends and everybody around they look up
[52:25] Speaker 3: to our marriage. When people see it, they say, you
[52:27] Speaker 3: know what I do want that? Yeah, because the world
[52:29] Speaker 3: tells you not to go for it, your pain tells
[52:31] Speaker 3: you not to go for it. The world is talking
[52:33] Speaker 3: to you. But God, if God has called you to
[52:35] Speaker 3: be married, He's going to make sure that it happens.
[52:37] Speaker 3: But you have to trust that God can restore whatever God,
[52:40] Speaker 3: whatever God creates, he's going to make sure that he
[52:43] Speaker 3: works through it, and he's going to take care of
[52:44] Speaker 3: it and he's going to complete it. You just trust
[52:47] Speaker 3: him in the process. I've watched people get divorced. I've
[52:52] Speaker 3: seen so many divorces. I've watched people leave marriages. Like
[52:57] Speaker 3: I've watched people who already had an escape plan. It
[52:59] Speaker 3: was a clip that I saw that really annoyed me
[53:02] Speaker 3: about an escape plan. You know, either you got another person,
[53:05] Speaker 3: or you saving some money, or it's just the mindset
[53:08] Speaker 3: that you want to escaping. Like I said, that means
[53:09] Speaker 3: that you have one foot out side of the covenant.
[53:11] Speaker 3: And so why are we treating covenant like that? Why
[53:15] Speaker 3: are you Because that in another way, it's you telling God.
[53:17] Speaker 3: I don't trust you, So why are we treating it
[53:20] Speaker 3: that way? When you came into a marriage, the plan
[53:23] Speaker 3: was not to escape. The plan was to make sure
[53:24] Speaker 3: that you're honoring God. So why are we getting away
[53:27] Speaker 3: from that? What is it that you are so desperate
[53:29] Speaker 3: to have in your life to where you can't fulfill
[53:32] Speaker 3: the will of God? That's pride. That's all that it is,
[53:35] Speaker 3: is people's pride. And people can't get that under control.
[53:40] Speaker 3: They can't get that pride under control, and that's why
[53:42] Speaker 3: we can't really have healthy marriages like we should have, because,
[53:47] Speaker 3: for one, people are not using the appropriate models that
[53:49] Speaker 3: they're supposed to be used. Yep, that's the biggest issue
[53:52] Speaker 3: that I have, and I you know, I anybody who
[53:55] Speaker 3: is married, who is in a season right now. My
[54:00] Speaker 3: biggest thing is to remember that God is greater than
[54:02] Speaker 3: whatever season it is that you are in. But in
[54:05] Speaker 3: order for you to trust God, that means that you
[54:06] Speaker 3: have to relinquish control as well. You have to trust
[54:09] Speaker 3: something that you don't see, and you have to fully
[54:11] Speaker 3: surrender control to God. But people cannot fully surrender control
[54:14] Speaker 3: to God. It's hard for him to do so because
[54:16] Speaker 3: now I can't control it. How I want it to
[54:18] Speaker 3: look so.
[54:19] Speaker 1: We're going to stay there. And then, so how can
[54:21] Speaker 1: they surrender? What does surrender? Fully surrendering over to God.
[54:25] Speaker 1: Say that you have a let's create a scenario a wife.
[54:29] Speaker 1: I'm going to say a husband, because it's too low fruit.
[54:33] Speaker 1: If I say a wife found out a husband's cheating,
[54:36] Speaker 1: a husband finds out his wife is cheating on her,
[54:39] Speaker 1: the Bible gives you grounds to get a divorce. But
[54:41] Speaker 1: y'a also says that, hey, if you want to stay
[54:43] Speaker 1: in that marriage, you want to honor it, I can
[54:45] Speaker 1: heal that as well.
[54:46] Speaker 2: What does it look like to surrender to.
[54:48] Speaker 3: Fully petition in prayer? That's the first thing, to fully
[54:52] Speaker 3: petition in prayer. God is so good that he gives
[54:55] Speaker 3: us his character and his nature and specific and we
[55:00] Speaker 3: can petition it in the spirit. So if you need healing,
[55:03] Speaker 3: you call on a God who heals. You go into
[55:06] Speaker 3: your prayer. You caught on a God who heals. And
[55:08] Speaker 3: if your spouse for some reason doesn't want to pray
[55:10] Speaker 3: for you, you can create holiness in your marriage. Again
[55:13] Speaker 3: you give it to God. That's going to be a
[55:15] Speaker 3: every day, daily surrendering. I'm angry today, I'm mad today.
[55:20] Speaker 3: I'm hurt today. But Lord, I know you can provide. Lord,
[55:23] Speaker 3: I know you are a healer. Lord, I know that
[55:25] Speaker 3: you can sustain this marriage. Lord, I know that you
[55:27] Speaker 3: can restore this. But that's a daily sacrifice that has
[55:30] Speaker 3: to be given. But also in the midst of that
[55:33] Speaker 3: as well, you got to layer your spiritual disciplines as well.
[55:35] Speaker 3: It's not just prayer, fast as well. Fast for your marriage.
[55:39] Speaker 3: The Lord told me before. It was a whole bunch
[55:42] Speaker 3: of scenanigans that happened this year. The Lord told me.
[55:44] Speaker 3: I believe it was January twelfth, and he told me
[55:46] Speaker 3: to anoint my marriage. My marriage was attacked. A couple
[55:48] Speaker 3: of weeks after that, God woke me up and sold
[55:51] Speaker 3: me to anoint my marriage. I went in my prayer closet,
[55:53] Speaker 3: I turned my coundles on, I turned that big light off.
[55:55] Speaker 3: I went over there, I got my oil, I prayed
[55:57] Speaker 3: over my ol, I blessed myself and I went into prayer,
[56:01] Speaker 3: and then I put the oil on my ring. And
[56:02] Speaker 3: when my husband's sleep, I put the oil on his ring.
[56:04] Speaker 3: And I went back into that prayer closet and I
[56:06] Speaker 3: was praying, and I was warning in the spirit because
[56:08] Speaker 3: he was showing me something was coming, something big was
[56:11] Speaker 3: about to come and attack your marriage. Because my marriage
[56:14] Speaker 3: is going to be a great example for other marriages.
[56:17] Speaker 3: And so I had to go into that clause. And
[56:19] Speaker 3: this is not a one time thing. I have to
[56:21] Speaker 3: continue to anoint my marriage.
[56:23] Speaker 4: That means that.
[56:24] Speaker 3: So for a person who was going through that in
[56:25] Speaker 3: that moment, learn how to anoint your marriage.
[56:28] Speaker 4: Get so close to God, pray.
[56:30] Speaker 3: So much, meditate on your words so much that His
[56:33] Speaker 3: voice becomes something that's just instant. You can hear it
[56:36] Speaker 3: before you hear your own voice. You want to be
[56:38] Speaker 3: a direct communication with God. Larry your disciplines because when God,
[56:42] Speaker 3: if you are going through something, God has to go
[56:44] Speaker 3: through all of these displance prayer and you just basically
[56:47] Speaker 3: have to go through consecration before He can commission you
[56:49] Speaker 3: out to where you're supposed to go to. So if
[56:51] Speaker 3: I'm about to do some restoring, cleansing and strengthening, I
[56:54] Speaker 3: need your yes as well. God is sovereign, he don't
[56:58] Speaker 3: need your permission for his authority. That's not what we're saying.
[57:01] Speaker 3: But he also doesn't need your resistance as well. If
[57:04] Speaker 3: you want God to restore your marriage, that means that
[57:06] Speaker 3: you need to give him your Yes, I'm hurting right now, Lord,
[57:10] Speaker 3: I am upset, But Jehovah Raphi, I know that you
[57:13] Speaker 3: are the God who heals right now, So God, I
[57:16] Speaker 3: am calling out to your name right now. I am hurt,
[57:19] Speaker 3: I am distressed, I am in agony, but I know
[57:22] Speaker 3: that my emotions are not bigger than your restoration, Father God.
[57:25] Speaker 3: So that is what I mean. Go in there in
[57:27] Speaker 3: war behind your marriage. Stop worrying about what other people say,
[57:30] Speaker 3: because half those people ain't never ward behind their marriage.
[57:33] Speaker 3: But this is something greater than you. This is God's
[57:35] Speaker 3: will right now. It's the sin that caused that person
[57:38] Speaker 3: to do what they did. It's the lustful spirit. And
[57:41] Speaker 3: once a person gets caught onto that lustful spirit, that
[57:44] Speaker 3: lustful spirit is never satisfied. I got a little bit
[57:47] Speaker 3: of this, but ooh, you got a taste it, and
[57:49] Speaker 3: let get Let's give you something else. So you got
[57:51] Speaker 3: to pray that spirit away as well. Okay, so maybe
[57:54] Speaker 3: you can't pray. Maybe the world got you, but that's
[57:56] Speaker 3: all right because God got me. I'm still over here,
[57:59] Speaker 3: so I'm gonna stealer. Make sure that I keep myself
[58:01] Speaker 3: set apart from sin, and I'm going to do what
[58:04] Speaker 3: God has called and commanded me to do. And I'm
[58:06] Speaker 3: going to pray that, in God's timing, by his nature,
[58:10] Speaker 3: by his will, that you will come back how He
[58:12] Speaker 3: needs you to come back, not just simply for me,
[58:15] Speaker 3: for the sake of what we have done for God,
[58:17] Speaker 3: for the sake of what God has called us to do.
[58:20] Speaker 2: I want you to speak to single women.
[58:23] Speaker 1: I get so many dms since I announced that I'm
[58:26] Speaker 1: getting married. It's inspired a lot of people. They've been like, Wow,
[58:30] Speaker 1: this is for us. We're going to create a hashtag
[58:32] Speaker 1: that says this is for all of us. But everybody
[58:34] Speaker 1: kept saying this engagement, this wedding is for all of us.
[58:39] Speaker 1: But there's also a segment of single women who have
[58:42] Speaker 1: grown weary and they're well doing. They've been seeking God
[58:45] Speaker 1: fast and volunteering at the church. They've taken courses, they've
[58:49] Speaker 1: gone to Woman Evolved, They've been every time there's a
[58:54] Speaker 1: moment to go fellowship with other women to lift up
[58:58] Speaker 1: the name of the Most High. They get high in
[59:01] Speaker 1: that moment and they come back to their homes with
[59:05] Speaker 1: no man in sight, and they desire that do you
[59:07] Speaker 1: have a word in your heart to encourage those women
[59:09] Speaker 1: and look at that camera and talk to you those.
[59:11] Speaker 4: Queens, Hey, single babies.
[59:14] Speaker 3: It is if you're called to be a wife, because
[59:17] Speaker 3: not everyone's called to be a wife, Not everyone's called
[59:19] Speaker 3: to be a husband. If you're called to be one,
[59:21] Speaker 3: you'll know because God. To keep it in your heart.
[59:23] Speaker 3: Make sure that the desire that you have is not
[59:25] Speaker 3: becoming an idol. Make sure that you keep God at
[59:28] Speaker 3: the center of everything that you're doing. That whatever it
[59:30] Speaker 3: is that you're doing, you're doing it for the glory
[59:31] Speaker 3: of God, and you are doing it for the sake
[59:33] Speaker 3: of God, not for the sake of being married. Whoever
[59:36] Speaker 3: God has for you, they will find their way to you.
[59:39] Speaker 3: But He is going to take you through a season
[59:41] Speaker 3: of preparation. You're going to have to be pruned and refined.
[59:45] Speaker 3: But you have to be patient. I know it's uncomfortable,
[59:47] Speaker 3: I know it is a lonely road. But keep God,
[59:51] Speaker 3: keep Jesus at the center. You will find love. God
[59:54] Speaker 3: is love. You will find love there. If you feel
[59:57] Speaker 3: like I'm lonely, take that to God. Keep taking that
[59:59] Speaker 3: to God. He would give you the comfort in that season.
[1:00:02] Speaker 3: If you feel like you need refuge, you feel like
[1:00:04] Speaker 3: it's not safe for you to be alone. Seek refuge
[1:00:06] Speaker 3: on the god swaying. He is going to be there.
[1:00:08] Speaker 3: But whatever it is that you are going through, whatever desire,
[1:00:10] Speaker 3: you have, submit that to God. So if your desire
[1:00:14] Speaker 3: aligns with His will, it would be so in his timing.
[1:00:17] Speaker 3: But you have to trust God in the process. H
[1:00:23] Speaker 3: I want married people to win. I want marriage to win,
[1:00:26] Speaker 3: but I want God to win above all. Yeah, but
[1:00:28] Speaker 3: I want marriage. I want marriage to be what it
[1:00:32] Speaker 3: is supposed to be. And I don't want people to
[1:00:34] Speaker 3: distort marriage anymore because I know the things that people
[1:00:38] Speaker 3: do grieve the spirit, And I've said that a number
[1:00:40] Speaker 3: of times.
[1:00:41] Speaker 1: How do you balance you know, you said, don't make
[1:00:44] Speaker 1: marriage an idol? How does someone not making the idol?
[1:00:48] Speaker 1: Or how do they distinguish whether or not they are
[1:00:50] Speaker 1: making the idol? They say, I wake up, I think
[1:00:51] Speaker 1: about it. I desire marriage. I'm about to hit forty
[1:00:56] Speaker 1: years old. I've been desired marriage. How do I know
[1:00:58] Speaker 1: that I'm not making that right?
[1:01:00] Speaker 4: That's how you know? Right there?
[1:01:01] Speaker 3: Are you fighting against a clock? You are fighting against
[1:01:03] Speaker 3: an imaginary clock. When it starts to become emotionally distressing
[1:01:07] Speaker 3: or it feels like it's becoming a pressure or you're
[1:01:10] Speaker 3: fighting against a clock that less you know, that's a
[1:01:12] Speaker 3: key indication that has become an idol.
[1:01:15] Speaker 1: But think about you go to a gynocologists you want
[1:01:17] Speaker 1: to have kids. They want to have kids the right
[1:01:19] Speaker 1: way and covenant. The gynocologists are saying, hey, list, you're
[1:01:22] Speaker 1: thirty five years old. You're about to have a geriatric childbirth,
[1:01:26] Speaker 1: So do you really want to have kids? Go find somebody,
[1:01:28] Speaker 1: get these kids together. And you're doing everything right. You're
[1:01:32] Speaker 1: getting older and older and older, and now you're afraid
[1:01:35] Speaker 1: that you're going to be perimental pouzzle and then you
[1:01:39] Speaker 1: give up the opportunity to have a kid.
[1:01:40] Speaker 3: You can be doing everything right, but if it doesn't
[1:01:42] Speaker 3: align with God's will, it's not going to happen. You
[1:01:44] Speaker 3: can be doing everything right according to your will, like
[1:01:47] Speaker 3: I was saying earlier, you're doing everything right according to
[1:01:49] Speaker 3: your well, But what if God didn't even call you
[1:01:51] Speaker 3: to have kids, like that's your desire, But.
[1:01:54] Speaker 1: Then they have to gree the thought of not having
[1:01:56] Speaker 1: that Once that and the only way they're gonna know
[1:01:58] Speaker 1: that most of the time is after that time I
[1:02:00] Speaker 1: just transpired.
[1:02:00] Speaker 3: I'd rather you grieve the thought than doing something by
[1:02:04] Speaker 3: your own will and having to live the consequences of
[1:02:07] Speaker 3: that of not obeying God. I would much rather you
[1:02:10] Speaker 3: go through that process of grieving the thought of it.
[1:02:13] Speaker 3: I know it's uncomfortable because society tells us as women,
[1:02:15] Speaker 3: we're supposed to have kids, we're supposed to marry and
[1:02:17] Speaker 3: things like that. But you keep taking that to God.
[1:02:20] Speaker 3: Pray fast, consecrate, meditate on a word, Allow God to
[1:02:25] Speaker 3: give you that answer. Pray that God gives you the answer.
[1:02:28] Speaker 3: If He chooses to reveal it to you, you're going
[1:02:31] Speaker 3: to have to obey and accept it because we don't
[1:02:34] Speaker 3: know what's going to happen a minute from now, yep,
[1:02:36] Speaker 3: two months from now. But God knows what our life
[1:02:38] Speaker 3: is going to be, and he knows what he's protecting
[1:02:41] Speaker 3: us from. But he also knows what our calling iss
[1:02:43] Speaker 3: as well. So sometimes it's uncomfortable, but you have to
[1:02:46] Speaker 3: just accept it for what God has for you, and
[1:02:50] Speaker 3: you know, just ta.
[1:02:52] Speaker 4: Keep taking it to God.
[1:02:53] Speaker 3: I mean sometimes it's some moments where you just got
[1:02:54] Speaker 3: to cry and say Lord, why mean?
[1:02:56] Speaker 2: But you know it, just go through the process.
[1:03:00] Speaker 3: Yeah, and you know, I hope that whatever it is
[1:03:03] Speaker 3: that God has for everybody, that it passes through like
[1:03:06] Speaker 3: it's supposed to. And I really pray that everyone eventually
[1:03:10] Speaker 3: gives God. Yes, you will be surprised when you give God. Yes,
[1:03:13] Speaker 3: what happens when you do?
[1:03:15] Speaker 2: What is that song you kept humming? You want to
[1:03:17] Speaker 2: sing it?
[1:03:17] Speaker 4: Unchanging hand?
[1:03:18] Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm not sing on spot down now, don't sing it. Then,
[1:03:29] Speaker 5: don't sing it, but let let the song come out
[1:03:31] Speaker 5: of your heart. See beautiful, I didn't know you could
[1:03:35] Speaker 5: sing so well.
[1:03:36] Speaker 3: It's God, so changing hand. He's kept it on my
[1:03:38] Speaker 3: spirit for a while. He's kept it on my spirit.
[1:03:40] Speaker 2: For what can you put on the spirit of the people?
[1:03:42] Speaker 2: Can you sing it?
[1:03:42] Speaker 4: Why are you trying to make me sing so.
[1:03:44] Speaker 2: Because you sounded great, I did not know that you
[1:03:46] Speaker 2: can sing.
[1:03:47] Speaker 4: I get nervous on spot.
[1:03:49] Speaker 2: We are looking at you. Everybody turned it back, everybody,
[1:03:53] Speaker 2: everybody took it around.
[1:03:54] Speaker 3: Now I'm not gonna do it. I'm just I just
[1:03:56] Speaker 3: getting nervous on spot. You're gonna throw me off.
[1:03:58] Speaker 1: No, it was so cool. I was like, I was
[1:04:00] Speaker 1: listening to you home and I said I didn't know
[1:04:01] Speaker 1: you can say He was like, yeah, I can.
[1:04:03] Speaker 5: Yeah.
[1:04:03] Speaker 3: I listened to a lot of old school music. God's
[1:04:05] Speaker 3: on Changing Hand is just a great song that says
[1:04:08] Speaker 3: to hold onto God's hand, God's on changing Hand, And
[1:04:10] Speaker 3: I really do I believe that if people do that,
[1:04:15] Speaker 3: there'll be a lot more content for where their life is.
[1:04:19] Speaker 3: If you now, sometimes when you hold onto God's hand,
[1:04:21] Speaker 3: he be moving, it get a little rough, but you
[1:04:23] Speaker 3: keep onto his hand because one thing God is going
[1:04:25] Speaker 3: to do is I always fulfill his promises. And he
[1:04:27] Speaker 3: showed us he's always fulfilled his promises. So if God
[1:04:29] Speaker 3: says it's going to be, it's going to be. Trusting
[1:04:32] Speaker 3: God is a different conversation. But when you hold onto
[1:04:35] Speaker 3: his hand, you're gonna have some faith. You gotta have
[1:04:38] Speaker 3: faith that God's gonna do it.
[1:04:40] Speaker 2: How long?
[1:04:41] Speaker 3: For two weeks, two weeks, two weeks it's been. It
[1:04:43] Speaker 3: was just playing over in the middle of the night,
[1:04:45] Speaker 3: and it just kept happening. It just kept happening. It
[1:04:47] Speaker 3: just kept happening, and I started to kind of realize
[1:04:50] Speaker 3: why it was not just for me. It was people
[1:04:52] Speaker 3: that I was speaking to over the past couple of
[1:04:54] Speaker 3: works in the past two weeks of just knowing that whatever
[1:04:57] Speaker 3: God said he's going to do, he's going to do
[1:04:59] Speaker 3: his nature.
[1:05:00] Speaker 4: It's not going to change.
[1:05:00] Speaker 3: So regardless you may do certain things, you may do
[1:05:03] Speaker 3: things that grieve the spirit. God is still going to
[1:05:05] Speaker 3: be God at the end of the day, and he
[1:05:06] Speaker 3: has redemptive love, just as he has redemptive anger. So
[1:05:09] Speaker 3: even if you anger God, you'll be redeemed. But you
[1:05:13] Speaker 3: have to stay right there at God's feet.
[1:05:15] Speaker 2: Can you know how you snapped?
[1:05:17] Speaker 1: How much you snapped when I just mentioned about marriage,
[1:05:19] Speaker 1: and how sorry? Did I again? You went in for
[1:05:24] Speaker 1: about ten minutes. Oh yeah, you snapping And I loved
[1:05:29] Speaker 1: it because that's when you're operating in your passion. It's
[1:05:32] Speaker 1: like and when I tell you you carried so much
[1:05:35] Speaker 1: weight in that and so much wisdom because the reality is, yes.
[1:05:40] Speaker 2: We do use marriage very haphazardly. You know what I'm saying.
[1:05:43] Speaker 1: We treat marriage a lot of times people are treating
[1:05:45] Speaker 1: marriage like their dating life, you know what I'm saying,
[1:05:47] Speaker 1: to be like I broke up with them in the marriage,
[1:05:49] Speaker 1: like I don't want to be with them. No mo,
[1:05:51] Speaker 1: he may be mad you like you married. You just
[1:05:53] Speaker 1: can't just break up, you know what I'm saying. But
[1:05:55] Speaker 1: it's the same level of it. I interviewed jess Lynn
[1:06:00] Speaker 1: told her, and she calls it stick to itness. She said,
[1:06:03] Speaker 1: why don't people have stick to itness anymore? That they
[1:06:06] Speaker 1: go through it? Argument don't want to be married? No more,
[1:06:08] Speaker 1: they go through a problem, they don't want to be married.
[1:06:10] Speaker 1: The lights get cut off, electricity a bill to get paid.
[1:06:13] Speaker 2: I can't. I ain't gonna be married to nobody with
[1:06:15] Speaker 2: a lights getting caught and leave.
[1:06:16] Speaker 1: You be like, why take vows for richer, for poor,
[1:06:19] Speaker 1: for better or for worse through sickness and and hell,
[1:06:21] Speaker 1: why do you take those extreme vowels if you can't
[1:06:24] Speaker 1: even handle any part of that?
[1:06:26] Speaker 2: You know, And it's it's interesting.
[1:06:27] Speaker 3: People just don't have God at the center. A threefold
[1:06:30] Speaker 3: court is harder to break. The word tells us that
[1:06:33] Speaker 3: it's harder to break when God is at that center,
[1:06:35] Speaker 3: he will keep it together. When you start to feel
[1:06:37] Speaker 3: like you are coming off, it's getting rocket stuff like that.
[1:06:40] Speaker 3: As long as God is into center, in the center,
[1:06:42] Speaker 3: you treat it as such, it's not going to break.
[1:06:45] Speaker 3: That is it's the people who don't keep God at
[1:06:47] Speaker 3: the center. They keep God on standby.
[1:06:52] Speaker 2: I can talk to.
[1:06:52] Speaker 1: You all day, I know. Let me just say this
[1:06:54] Speaker 1: to you, what do you have on your heart. Anything
[1:06:56] Speaker 1: else you want to say before I let you go?
[1:06:57] Speaker 1: You got any projects we can support about to bring you?
[1:07:00] Speaker 1: Are you going to bring life back into your podcast?
[1:07:02] Speaker 1: You're gonna bring your podcast.
[1:07:03] Speaker 4: They're gonna bring life back into my podcasts. I am.
[1:07:06] Speaker 4: You know what everyone wants me to cook?
[1:07:08] Speaker 3: You know, the last time I did a video where
[1:07:10] Speaker 3: I was cooking and I was talking about I don't
[1:07:11] Speaker 3: know if it was Ruth or Essa.
[1:07:12] Speaker 4: I can't remember who it was, but.
[1:07:14] Speaker 3: They like, we like when you cook because there's a
[1:07:15] Speaker 3: lot of women who have not been trained on how
[1:07:18] Speaker 3: to be a wife. And so it's like they look
[1:07:20] Speaker 3: at me and they're like, you have it all together,
[1:07:21] Speaker 3: and it's like, hey, y'all are only saying what was
[1:07:24] Speaker 3: poured in to me. But I do have that. I
[1:07:27] Speaker 3: am going to be working back on my podcast. I'm
[1:07:28] Speaker 3: going to get back to what people have been asking
[1:07:30] Speaker 3: me to do. But my biggest thing right now is
[1:07:31] Speaker 3: for anyone who is listening right now. I know that
[1:07:34] Speaker 3: life can seem like it is crazy, and life can
[1:07:37] Speaker 3: feel unstable, but God can stabilize the unstable, and you
[1:07:40] Speaker 3: have to remember that as long as you find your
[1:07:43] Speaker 3: way back to God.
[1:07:44] Speaker 4: It's hard right now in this season.
[1:07:46] Speaker 3: It's hard in the world that we live in because
[1:07:47] Speaker 3: you have so many people who are telling you God's
[1:07:49] Speaker 3: not real and why would God allow this? But remember
[1:07:52] Speaker 3: that we serve a God that is a God of love.
[1:07:54] Speaker 3: Remember that we serve a redemptive God. We serve a
[1:07:57] Speaker 3: transformative God. And God can restore with whatever it is,
[1:08:00] Speaker 3: and he can meet every need that you have so long.
[1:08:02] Speaker 4: As it aligns with His will.
[1:08:04] Speaker 3: And I can tell you as somebody who has lived
[1:08:05] Speaker 3: in the world and has done so many things to
[1:08:08] Speaker 3: grieve the spirit, it is a better life to live
[1:08:11] Speaker 3: when you are living and serving God because He will
[1:08:14] Speaker 3: preserve you so long as you serve him. So that's
[1:08:16] Speaker 3: that's my word for whoever is on the other side.
[1:08:19] Speaker 2: Want you stop now because you.
[1:08:20] Speaker 1: Were setting them up for the Center's prayer, So go
[1:08:21] Speaker 1: ahead and just take them on that. I was setting
[1:08:23] Speaker 1: him up aware you were about to bring him to Christ.
[1:08:25] Speaker 1: Go ahead and go ahead, go ahead and take them
[1:08:27] Speaker 1: through the Center's prayer and we're gonna.
[1:08:29] Speaker 2: Pray for him.
[1:08:30] Speaker 1: That's what you sending them all up in that we're
[1:08:33] Speaker 1: off the call, So go ahead and go ahead and
[1:08:35] Speaker 1: bring them to this gonna.
[1:08:36] Speaker 4: Get We're gonna close our prayers all right.
[1:08:40] Speaker 3: This is for everyone who is sitting and watching this
[1:08:44] Speaker 3: on the screen right now, for those who are weary
[1:08:46] Speaker 3: in our spirit, for those who feel lost, for those
[1:08:49] Speaker 3: who are confused, for those who are doubtful. Father God,
[1:08:52] Speaker 3: I thank you for bringing us together today in this moment,
[1:08:54] Speaker 3: Father God, Father God, I thank you for utilizing our
[1:08:57] Speaker 3: voices to be able to heal the hearts of those
[1:09:00] Speaker 3: who are listening. We thank you God for your transformation.
[1:09:03] Speaker 3: We thank you for your steadfast and his Father God,
[1:09:05] Speaker 3: we thank you for always being there with us.
[1:09:08] Speaker 4: God.
[1:09:08] Speaker 3: We thank you for giving us the healing that is necessary.
[1:09:11] Speaker 3: Father God, we thank you for finding us in a
[1:09:14] Speaker 3: weary moments, Father God. For those who are anxious right now,
[1:09:16] Speaker 3: Father God, I speak of covering over their life, Father God.
[1:09:19] Speaker 3: For those who are emotionally distressed, Father God, for those
[1:09:21] Speaker 3: who feel like they are losing the battle. Father God,
[1:09:24] Speaker 3: are calling you Jehovah Nissi because you are a covering
[1:09:27] Speaker 3: Father God, you are a victory and we are victorious
[1:09:30] Speaker 3: so long as we are with you, Father God, I
[1:09:32] Speaker 3: ask you to cover those who are hurting right now,
[1:09:34] Speaker 3: Father God, remember that remind them, Father God, that you
[1:09:38] Speaker 3: are the healer above all healers. Father God, remind them
[1:09:41] Speaker 3: that they can be able to find you, Father God.
[1:09:43] Speaker 3: For those who are weeping right now, Father God, I
[1:09:46] Speaker 3: pray for a healing power, Father God, I pray for
[1:09:49] Speaker 3: a movement in their life right now, Father God, a
[1:09:51] Speaker 3: supernatural healing, Father God. Whatever is coming against them, Father God,
[1:09:55] Speaker 3: I cast it out right now, Father God, whatever the
[1:09:58] Speaker 3: enemy is doing right now, I ask that you and
[1:10:01] Speaker 3: camp your angels around the believers right now, Father God,
[1:10:04] Speaker 3: that you remind them that you are their shepherd, Father God,
[1:10:08] Speaker 3: and you have ordered their step. Father God. When they
[1:10:10] Speaker 3: feel lost, Father God, remind them that you are there.
[1:10:13] Speaker 3: Right now, Father God, we exalt your name, Father God,
[1:10:16] Speaker 3: because you are a God of your promises. Father God,
[1:10:19] Speaker 3: you are the God of Abraham. Father God, you are
[1:10:22] Speaker 3: the God of Isaac. Father God, you are the God
[1:10:24] Speaker 3: of Jacob. Father God, Father God, you are the God
[1:10:26] Speaker 3: who has helped us in all moments of need, Father God,
[1:10:30] Speaker 3: those who have been helped captive. Father God, you are
[1:10:33] Speaker 3: the God of refuse. You are the God who have
[1:10:35] Speaker 3: rescued and delivered. Right now, Father God, in this moment,
[1:10:38] Speaker 3: right now, Father God, there is someone in their marriage
[1:10:41] Speaker 3: right now who is struggling.
[1:10:42] Speaker 4: They are ready to walk away.
[1:10:44] Speaker 3: Father God, remind them that their marriage is to serve
[1:10:47] Speaker 3: those who are under Christ. Father God, that their marriages
[1:10:50] Speaker 3: us to glorify you, because you are worthy of praise.
[1:10:54] Speaker 3: You are worthy of being glorified right now, Father God,
[1:10:57] Speaker 3: and we ask that you stand with us in these
[1:10:59] Speaker 3: weeping gours.
[1:11:00] Speaker 4: Father God, and.
[1:11:00] Speaker 3: We thank you for the grace that covers us at night,
[1:11:03] Speaker 3: Father God, and the mercy that meets us in the morning.
[1:11:06] Speaker 3: Father God, you are the God of promises, You are
[1:11:09] Speaker 3: the God of healing. And we will forever praise and
[1:11:11] Speaker 3: worship you.
[1:11:12] Speaker 4: Father God. We will forever exalt your name.
[1:11:14] Speaker 3: In this moment right now, I raise your name, Hi,
[1:11:18] Speaker 3: for you are our banner right now, for anyone who
[1:11:20] Speaker 3: is in distress, for anyone who is struggling financial burdens.
[1:11:23] Speaker 3: Right now, Father God, remind them that they are conquerors
[1:11:27] Speaker 3: in the spirit. Father God, remind them to continue to
[1:11:30] Speaker 3: search for your heart. That there is authority in your name.
[1:11:33] Speaker 3: Father God. I thank you for our counsel. I thank
[1:11:35] Speaker 3: you for the advocacy. I thank you for the Holy Spirit.
[1:11:38] Speaker 3: I thank you for Jesus who died on Cavary. We
[1:11:40] Speaker 3: thank you for the stripes to heal. We thank you
[1:11:42] Speaker 3: for the blood that has replenished and the blood that
[1:11:45] Speaker 3: has cleansed and restored us. And we praise and we
[1:11:47] Speaker 3: magnify your name and a mighty master's name. We pray, Amen.
[1:11:51] Speaker 2: Man, Amen, Amen.
[1:11:54] Speaker 5: I like that.
[1:11:56] Speaker 4: Yeah, I got a cool dawn. Oh boy, Oh I
[1:12:00] Speaker 4: need some water. Jesus, God is.
[1:12:03] Speaker 1: Good, Yes he is. And that's what this is about.
[1:12:08] Speaker 1: I didn't know what I was going to talk to
[1:12:09] Speaker 1: you about. I just know I had a fellow believe
[1:12:12] Speaker 1: and I said, I'm gonna let God do what God do,
[1:12:15] Speaker 1: and I know how to submit and surrender to the
[1:12:17] Speaker 1: flow of the Holy Spirit. And this is what God
[1:12:19] Speaker 1: wanted people to hear. I know y'all heard a lot
[1:12:24] Speaker 1: of information in this episode, a lot of value. I
[1:12:29] Speaker 1: touch and agree with her that if you're going through
[1:12:32] Speaker 1: marital issues, that that thing is not bigger than our God,
[1:12:36] Speaker 1: that if you submit surrender that thing. I remember I
[1:12:38] Speaker 1: did a podcast and I did the podcast and I
[1:12:42] Speaker 1: was at Jamal Brian Church.
[1:12:44] Speaker 2: I was at New Birth and we're doing the.
[1:12:47] Speaker 1: Live podcast there and this couple came and they said
[1:12:51] Speaker 1: you're your podcast saved our marriage and I brought him
[1:12:55] Speaker 1: on the podcast and they talked about how they were
[1:12:58] Speaker 1: on the verge of divorce.
[1:12:59] Speaker 2: They was like, this is done.
[1:13:01] Speaker 1: And then somebody sent them an episode is the episode
[1:13:04] Speaker 1: I did with David Burst.
[1:13:05] Speaker 2: They saw the episode.
[1:13:06] Speaker 1: And they were like, the husband's like, all right, let
[1:13:09] Speaker 1: me get my act together. And God used that episode
[1:13:11] Speaker 1: to light the fire for them to start bringing reconciliation
[1:13:16] Speaker 1: to their marriage. And So what you're saying right now
[1:13:19] Speaker 1: is a couple that's watching this podcast, It's going to
[1:13:21] Speaker 1: be someone that is watching this podcast that their brothers,
[1:13:25] Speaker 1: sister is going through the same thing, their friend, their coworker.
[1:13:28] Speaker 1: They're gonna say, just watch this episode and they're gonna
[1:13:31] Speaker 1: hear the voice of God through the words that you spoke.
[1:13:34] Speaker 2: And they're gonna say, I'm gonna hold on a little longer.
[1:13:37] Speaker 2: I'm gonna go in.
[1:13:38] Speaker 1: My prayer closet, I'm gonna begin to pray. I'm gonna
[1:13:40] Speaker 1: take this annoy and oil and I'm gonna put it
[1:13:42] Speaker 1: on my wedding ring and I'm gonna go touch my
[1:13:45] Speaker 1: spouse and put.
[1:13:46] Speaker 2: It on there on their wedding ring.
[1:13:48] Speaker 1: And I'm gonna begin to pray, and then to see
[1:13:49] Speaker 1: that everything that the devil is trying to come against
[1:13:53] Speaker 1: my marriage, that God is going to break it in
[1:13:55] Speaker 1: the spirit ram until I see it in the natural realm.
[1:13:57] Speaker 1: They're gonna begin to pray, God open up doors old
[1:14:00] Speaker 1: man can shut, and shut doors that no man can open.
[1:14:02] Speaker 1: They're gonna pray that no weapon formed against their marriage
[1:14:04] Speaker 1: shall prosper, and every tongue that rises up against them
[1:14:07] Speaker 1: shall be condemned. They're gonna be able to intercede. They're
[1:14:09] Speaker 1: gonna get the language in order to war against the
[1:14:12] Speaker 1: spirit because what happens is is that it starts in
[1:14:14] Speaker 1: the spirit ram. And so often we take what happens
[1:14:18] Speaker 1: in the spirit realm unbeknownst to us, not knowing it's
[1:14:20] Speaker 1: taking place, and then we're warring against each other where
[1:14:23] Speaker 1: the Bible says we wrestle out against flesh and blood,
[1:14:25] Speaker 1: but against principalities and high places. And so now we
[1:14:27] Speaker 1: got to start seeing through our spiritual eyes where we're
[1:14:29] Speaker 1: able to see. Hold on, hold on, I see my
[1:14:31] Speaker 1: spouse acting like this or whatever. God, I know what
[1:14:34] Speaker 1: you told me when you when you told me to
[1:14:35] Speaker 1: marry that person. I know what vows we to. I
[1:14:38] Speaker 1: know how beautiful it was on our wedding day. I
[1:14:40] Speaker 1: know how we overcame this, and I know how we
[1:14:42] Speaker 1: overcame that. If you did it before, you'll do it again.
[1:14:44] Speaker 1: And so God, I know what the enemy is trying
[1:14:47] Speaker 1: to do right now. He's coming against my legacy, he's
[1:14:49] Speaker 1: coming against my familial structure, and we're going to come
[1:14:52] Speaker 1: against that.
[1:14:52] Speaker 2: Spirit in the name of Jesus.
[1:14:53] Speaker 1: And then you watch that restoration take place, so you'll
[1:14:56] Speaker 1: have a testimony, and so they're going to hear that
[1:14:58] Speaker 1: language from this episode, and you're gonna get testimonies with
[1:15:01] Speaker 1: people going to slide to your d MS and be like,
[1:15:03] Speaker 1: thank you, we needed to hear that. Thank you that
[1:15:06] Speaker 1: helped me single woman. Thank you that that gave me
[1:15:10] Speaker 1: a reference to be able to say, you know what,
[1:15:13] Speaker 1: I'm not going to idolize marriage. I'm going to stay
[1:15:17] Speaker 1: submitted to guy's will over my life and I'm not
[1:15:19] Speaker 1: going to be racing against the clock. Thank you for
[1:15:22] Speaker 1: giving me language to this. How can people keep up
[1:15:25] Speaker 1: with you?
[1:15:25] Speaker 2: Follow you? What call to action can we do?
[1:15:29] Speaker 4: They can follow me at Kitty J.
[1:15:31] Speaker 3: Rose on every single platform k I T T I
[1:15:34] Speaker 3: E j R O s E on every single platform.
[1:15:37] Speaker 2: Can they do you have any slots for coaching?
[1:15:40] Speaker 4: You do that counseling and coaching, not right now.
[1:15:43] Speaker 2: I don't.
[1:15:44] Speaker 4: My clients don't want to leave me.
[1:15:47] Speaker 2: Right now.
[1:15:48] Speaker 4: Thought we wrestle with that. They don't want to leave I.
[1:15:51] Speaker 3: Love them though, I love every single one of them.
[1:15:55] Speaker 3: It's going to be real light. We may got some Septembers,
[1:15:57] Speaker 3: a few in September.
[1:15:59] Speaker 1: Maybe well hopefully if you really need if you really
[1:16:02] Speaker 1: need it, go find out, go slide in the DM
[1:16:04] Speaker 1: and see if you can get in it so you
[1:16:07] Speaker 1: can get healed. I'm really big about healing and restoration,
[1:16:11] Speaker 1: and so hopefull you got some slots available. If not,
[1:16:14] Speaker 1: then start creating a cohort of people that you take
[1:16:16] Speaker 1: them through this whole group thing where you take about
[1:16:19] Speaker 1: twenty people through a four week or an eight week
[1:16:23] Speaker 1: intensive therapy thing or whatever.
[1:16:25] Speaker 2: So just just do something, and I.
[1:16:27] Speaker 4: Want the people to join my Bible studies too.
[1:16:30] Speaker 3: We have seen tremendous work and deliverance in the Bible Studies.
[1:16:36] Speaker 3: We've been able to help people in the community, and
[1:16:39] Speaker 3: we've been able to see people first time Bible study.
[1:16:42] Speaker 3: We've seen people who never purchased a physical Bible before
[1:16:45] Speaker 3: that's good, purchase their physical bibe.
[1:16:47] Speaker 4: We've purchased Bibles for people.
[1:16:48] Speaker 3: We've purchased numbers of Bibles for people and sent them
[1:16:50] Speaker 3: on Amazon to people because I'm like, hey, I need
[1:16:53] Speaker 3: you to have the physical word. I need you to
[1:16:55] Speaker 3: have the physical word because we're going to be studying.
[1:16:57] Speaker 3: Y'all not going to just listen to me. We're gonna study.
[1:16:59] Speaker 2: I like that.
[1:17:00] Speaker 3: We're gonna break down every word, Greek, Hebrew. We're gonna
[1:17:03] Speaker 3: go through every single thing. We're gonna dissect every single scripture,
[1:17:07] Speaker 3: parallel supporting scriptures.
[1:17:09] Speaker 4: We go deep in ourselves this.
[1:17:12] Speaker 3: I just started doing Bible study again a couple months ago,
[1:17:15] Speaker 3: maybe two three months.
[1:17:17] Speaker 2: Maybe what made you do that?
[1:17:19] Speaker 5: God?
[1:17:21] Speaker 3: You think I woke up one day and said I
[1:17:22] Speaker 3: want to wake up on Saturday at six am in
[1:17:24] Speaker 3: the morning. Am every Saturday. And you'll be surprised. West Coast,
[1:17:28] Speaker 3: We'll be having people in Africa, London just and they
[1:17:31] Speaker 3: we start off with worship, We pray, we go on worship.
[1:17:35] Speaker 3: Sometimes the prayer goes long because when I'm when I'm
[1:17:38] Speaker 3: in war, prayer, it just it becomes something we've been
[1:17:40] Speaker 3: there for forty five minutes prayer. But we pray, we worship,
[1:17:43] Speaker 3: and then we get into the Word and then we
[1:17:45] Speaker 3: pray and we end it. It's not a regular Bible study,
[1:17:48] Speaker 3: but I love it because it's a lot of first time.
[1:17:51] Speaker 3: It's who return and they keep returning.
[1:17:53] Speaker 2: Six am Central Standard times.
[1:17:56] Speaker 4: Zoom and it's on zoom.
[1:17:58] Speaker 1: Spacifics down in the time. I'm seven Eastern time in Africa,
[1:18:02] Speaker 1: know what time it is.
[1:18:03] Speaker 3: When they do, they have a time to early and
[1:18:04] Speaker 3: it's good for people to wake up with the start
[1:18:06] Speaker 3: off for God and it start off in the Word
[1:18:08] Speaker 3: because it sets the tone for the day. Yes, so yeah,
[1:18:11] Speaker 3: they should join join my Bible studies.
[1:18:13] Speaker 4: Come on in.
[1:18:13] Speaker 3: I'm gonna get on YouTube and start doing more of
[1:18:15] Speaker 3: that because people love when I talk about the world
[1:18:17] Speaker 3: of God. So I said, let me do so, y'all.
[1:18:20] Speaker 3: I'm sorry, I've been a little busy. I'm so sorry,
[1:18:22] Speaker 3: but you know I'm here now.
[1:18:25] Speaker 2: Man, shout out to you King.
[1:18:28] Speaker 1: I love what what people don't understand is that when
[1:18:30] Speaker 1: you see a woman operating this, it's because her arms
[1:18:34] Speaker 1: are being lifted up by a man behind the scenes.
[1:18:37] Speaker 1: When you see a man operate in his brilliance in
[1:18:39] Speaker 1: his glory as a woman behind them, especially if they're married,
[1:18:42] Speaker 1: you see them lifting them up and holding them up.
[1:18:44] Speaker 1: And so the Bible says that the man will get
[1:18:46] Speaker 1: his glory through his wife.
[1:18:48] Speaker 2: And so if.
[1:18:48] Speaker 1: Y'all love kitty, that's because you got somebody behind that
[1:18:53] Speaker 1: that is helping her shine like that.
[1:18:55] Speaker 2: And so I love that.
[1:18:57] Speaker 1: So you're not a man that has to be in
[1:18:59] Speaker 1: the forefront, but you are in the forefront because you've
[1:19:02] Speaker 1: been seen by your wife. I try to slick them too,
[1:19:05] Speaker 1: I said, you ain't suposted over these poste anything. He said,
[1:19:07] Speaker 1: you tried to trick me. I said, you'll see this
[1:19:09] Speaker 1: over there.
[1:19:10] Speaker 4: But I do think I thank God for my husband.
[1:19:13] Speaker 4: I really do.
[1:19:14] Speaker 3: I thank God for my husband, and I thank God
[1:19:16] Speaker 3: for the marriage that God has created for us. And
[1:19:19] Speaker 3: I really thank God for giving me one more chance.
[1:19:22] Speaker 3: I really do thank God for giv me one more
[1:19:23] Speaker 3: chance because I'm not playing about this chance yeah right now.
[1:19:26] Speaker 4: So I thank God for that.
[1:19:27] Speaker 3: And we were doing amazing things in our marriage, and
[1:19:30] Speaker 3: we're seeing our children just be brilliant, and it's because
[1:19:34] Speaker 3: of what we have. And we're also seeing our community,
[1:19:37] Speaker 3: our parents and bringing our family together, and it's just
[1:19:39] Speaker 3: been a really amazing experience.
[1:19:41] Speaker 4: Have we been able to minister to the other people.
[1:19:43] Speaker 1: That's what I said. I said, God, you give me
[1:19:45] Speaker 1: one more chance at love. I'm gonna honor you on
[1:19:47] Speaker 1: levels that. Man, let me tell you something. I love
[1:19:48] Speaker 1: this for you, I said, Man, let me tell you something.
[1:19:50] Speaker 1: I'm happy.
[1:19:51] Speaker 4: I love this.
[1:19:51] Speaker 1: When I said, I am so happy because I've been praying,
[1:19:54] Speaker 1: I've been seeking, I've been healing. I've been laying on
[1:19:56] Speaker 1: my face crying before God. I've been speaking to my
[1:19:59] Speaker 1: heavenly language all these years, saying God, I understood what
[1:20:02] Speaker 1: the devil did. He ain't gonna win again. I said, oh,
[1:20:05] Speaker 1: he ain't gonna win again. And I said, I'm gonna
[1:20:07] Speaker 1: show you by the way I court this woman, how
[1:20:10] Speaker 1: I honor this woman, how I cover this woman. It's
[1:20:12] Speaker 1: a lot of things that you said in this episode
[1:20:14] Speaker 1: that's very similar to our journey. And so when she
[1:20:18] Speaker 1: comes on the Yellow Couch, we talk about it. We're like,
[1:20:21] Speaker 1: that's exactly what Kitty. She said. It's just she's gonna
[1:20:26] Speaker 1: love watching this because yeah, man, the guy who advised man,
[1:20:31] Speaker 1: it's awesome, say listen, thank y'all so much. Y'all give
[1:20:34] Speaker 1: it up for my girl, Kitty Rose.
[1:20:37] Speaker 2: Man.
[1:20:37] Speaker 1: Listen, make sure you go follow her on social media,
[1:20:40] Speaker 1: sign up for a Bible study.
[1:20:42] Speaker 2: So, without further ado, give it up for Kitty Rose.
[1:20:45] Speaker 2: Y'all stay tuned to the end for a letter to
[1:20:51] Speaker 2: my future wife.
[1:20:52] Speaker 4: Write in these love letters.
[1:20:59] Speaker 1: Ladarim thrust it suddenly into child protective services in twenty fifteen.
[1:21:05] Speaker 2: My nephew, black a boy.
[1:21:08] Speaker 1: The likelihood have been adopted outside of kinship.
[1:21:11] Speaker 2: Slim to none.
[1:21:12] Speaker 1: Ourmione sixteen years old, black a boy with five years
[1:21:18] Speaker 1: in the false care system before I even knew his name.
[1:21:21] Speaker 1: The likelihood have ever been adopted?
[1:21:24] Speaker 2: Yep, you guessed it. Slim to none.
[1:21:28] Speaker 1: While the Darien and Ourmiani were trying to survive and
[1:21:30] Speaker 1: barely thrive in an overpopulated and underfunded false care system,
[1:21:34] Speaker 1: I was living my own life, doing well professionally, having
[1:21:38] Speaker 1: been a single father with a daughter who at that
[1:21:40] Speaker 1: point was doing well in college. It was my time
[1:21:42] Speaker 1: to live my life right wrong. I felt unsettled, tireless, agitated.
[1:21:50] Speaker 1: There are just two many of our black children stuck
[1:21:54] Speaker 1: in ambiguity and in the limbo of the Falseter Care system.
[1:21:58] Speaker 1: In twenty seventeen, I legally adopted my nephew Ladarian.
[1:22:01] Speaker 2: Fast forward to twenty nineteen.
[1:22:03] Speaker 1: I had no ties to this other young king, but
[1:22:05] Speaker 1: I felt God instructed me to adopt them also on
[1:22:08] Speaker 1: il Babe. Starting over with parenting should have been enough. Right,
[1:22:12] Speaker 1: Working with various foster care and adoption agencies to help
[1:22:14] Speaker 1: bring awareness to the countless young Black kings and the
[1:22:18] Speaker 1: foster care system should have decreased my agitation.
[1:22:21] Speaker 2: Right.
[1:22:22] Speaker 1: Joining the board of directors of Advantage Adoption and organization
[1:22:25] Speaker 1: that helps find permanent adoptive homes for children in Falter
[1:22:28] Speaker 1: care should have led to some type of resolve.
[1:22:31] Speaker 2: Right.
[1:22:31] Speaker 1: No, not at all. None of it felt like I
[1:22:35] Speaker 1: had done enough. I now realized that every one of
[1:22:40] Speaker 1: those experiences was land the fundamental foundation for my life's mission.
[1:22:45] Speaker 1: Kingdom Royal. Kingdom Royal would be a luxury, state of
[1:22:49] Speaker 1: the art home for foster boys. Our first location will
[1:22:53] Speaker 1: be in the Dallas Fort Worth Metroplex. We will utilize
[1:22:55] Speaker 1: the whole person approach that instills identity, empowers them to
[1:22:59] Speaker 1: add for themselves, and enlightens them regarding new perspectives and
[1:23:04] Speaker 1: limitless options that they thought were impossible. Though, the young
[1:23:09] Speaker 1: Kings will attend the local public schools that are in
[1:23:11] Speaker 1: proximity to King of Royale. Our at home curriculum will
[1:23:15] Speaker 1: broaden their worldview through participating in the arts, attending various
[1:23:19] Speaker 1: cultural events, learning about and engaging in multifaceted discussions about
[1:23:24] Speaker 1: current events and even relevant historical contexts, Introducing them to
[1:23:28] Speaker 1: gardening and landscaping, and even caring for our animals on
[1:23:32] Speaker 1: our form and on site stables. We just launched our
[1:23:36] Speaker 1: startup capital campaign with the goal of raising two point
[1:23:39] Speaker 1: eight million dollars.
[1:23:39] Speaker 2: Now why two point eight million dollars? Well.
[1:23:42] Speaker 1: In twenty seventeen, I created a web series in which
[1:23:44] Speaker 1: I performed random acts of kindness for targeting the homeless community.
[1:23:48] Speaker 1: One of the most notable successes was that one of
[1:23:51] Speaker 1: the videos went viral, garnering twenty eight million views. However,
[1:23:56] Speaker 1: one of my biggest regrets is that I didn't raise
[1:23:59] Speaker 1: a single dollar to help in implementing a more sustainable
[1:24:02] Speaker 1: plan for the homeless community. So, throughout the years, with
[1:24:06] Speaker 1: much remorse, I reflect that I'm not maximizing that moment.
[1:24:10] Speaker 1: I knew if at that time just ten percent of
[1:24:13] Speaker 1: the viewers donated one dollar, we would have raised at
[1:24:16] Speaker 1: least two point eight million dollars that could have really
[1:24:19] Speaker 1: established long term support for the homeless community, or at
[1:24:23] Speaker 1: least started a long term initiative to do so. This
[1:24:27] Speaker 1: is my do over, This is our new beginning. Together,
[1:24:31] Speaker 1: we can attack this at the route by specifically helping
[1:24:35] Speaker 1: our homeless Black boys who are already disproportionately represented in
[1:24:40] Speaker 1: the American fossil care system.
[1:24:42] Speaker 2: I'm a Terra Sarwiodfield.
[1:24:43] Speaker 1: I've been nominated for three regional Emmys documenting my work
[1:24:47] Speaker 1: with the homeless as well as my personal adoption journey.
[1:24:50] Speaker 1: Despite those accolades, the greatest award for me is truly
[1:24:55] Speaker 1: providing the infrastructure for a transformed lifeanmoyal dot com for
[1:25:01] Speaker 1: more details, Crown of King and make a donation today.
[1:25:12] Speaker 2: Man, did y'all enjoy the episode as much as I did?
[1:25:15] Speaker 1: Man? When I say Kitty cooked, so we're gonna say
[1:25:18] Speaker 1: Kitty cooked because she showed it cooking this episode. Well,
[1:25:22] Speaker 1: here's my favorite part of the podcast where I speak
[1:25:25] Speaker 1: to my future wife and I know a lot of y'all.
[1:25:27] Speaker 1: When I say these letters now knowing that I'm getting engaged, y'all,
[1:25:31] Speaker 1: say these letters hit differently now, and I would agree
[1:25:34] Speaker 1: they really do. Dear future wife, here, from the moment
[1:25:38] Speaker 1: I slipped that ring on your finger, I vowed to
[1:25:41] Speaker 1: guard what God has entrusted to us as it were
[1:25:44] Speaker 1: the last flame in a cold world trying to snuff
[1:25:46] Speaker 1: it out. Our love will not be left unprotected in
[1:25:50] Speaker 1: the open fields where predators wrong. I will build walls
[1:25:53] Speaker 1: around it, not to shut the world out, but to
[1:25:56] Speaker 1: keep the sanctity in the sanctity of marriage isn't je
[1:26:00] Speaker 1: and the vows we recite, but in the way we
[1:26:02] Speaker 1: live them when no one is watching. It's in how
[1:26:04] Speaker 1: I choose you daily, even when my flesh wants to
[1:26:07] Speaker 1: choose self. It's how we protect our covenant from the
[1:26:11] Speaker 1: whispers of the enemy, the temptations of the culture, and
[1:26:15] Speaker 1: the erosion that comes from neglect. We will treat our
[1:26:19] Speaker 1: union like a sacred temple. No idol, no ambition, no offense,
[1:26:22] Speaker 1: will take residency where only God belongs. I will pray
[1:26:26] Speaker 1: over you when you're weary, cover you when you're exposed,
[1:26:29] Speaker 1: and speak life when the world speaks death. We'll show
[1:26:33] Speaker 1: the world that marriage is not outdated, its divine. And
[1:26:36] Speaker 1: when storms come because they will will stand together, back
[1:26:40] Speaker 1: to back, knowing the wind is no match for the
[1:26:44] Speaker 1: one who joined us, your future hobby. I hope you
[1:26:49] Speaker 1: enjoy this episode of the Dear Future WIFEI podcast. Remember
[1:26:52] Speaker 1: be live, live, intentionally and transparently, and don't stop loving.
[1:26:58] Speaker 2: Make sure to subscribe to our Dear Future That Your
[1:27:00] Speaker 2: Wife You YouTube channel.
[1:27:01] Speaker 1: We're available on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, and Stitcher.
[1:27:05] Speaker 2: We welcome your support. Simply share our podcast with your
[1:27:07] Speaker 2: friends and family.

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