# Prank 28 September 2026

An episode of [Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1481843603), 28 Sep 2026, 7:24.

Audio: https://traffic.omny.fm/d/clips/5dcefa8e-00a9-4595-8ce1-a4ab0080f142/00ea3494-e70f-4ca4-a74d-aca601166ed5/bcc3b906-dbf6-4e12-8c8a-b4d4004ccbaf/audio.mp3?utm_source=Podcast&in_playlist=33f66b34-8f1c-4663-a572-aca601179799

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

## Transcript

[0:01] Speaker 1: Here is another Senseless Survey from Darren Wackhead Simpson on
[0:06] Speaker 1: KFM Mornings.
[0:07] Speaker 2: KFM Mornings.
[0:09] Speaker 1: Okay, listen, we've loaded up with some great prizes on
[0:12] Speaker 1: the Senseless Survey. How's this? You know, we always say
[0:15] Speaker 1: that in this world moving towards AI, the one job
[0:21] Speaker 1: is not going to be able to replace. It's being
[0:24] Speaker 1: a tradesman.
[0:26] Speaker 2: Working with your hands.
[0:27] Speaker 1: Plumbing, electrical, all these sorts of things. On this wheel,
[0:31] Speaker 1: we've got a full scholarship on offer for either plumbing
[0:34] Speaker 1: or electrical worth over 80,000 Rand.
[0:38] Speaker 2: Sure, sign me up. Did you just say full scholarship?
[0:41] Speaker 1: A full scholarship from New Gen Trade Schools. And the
[0:46] Speaker 1: intake's in October this year, January, April, July, and also
[0:53] Speaker 1: for next year. So it doesn't have to be right now.
[0:56] Speaker 1: But if you're thinking of a change of career and
[0:58] Speaker 1: you win, this has to go to somebody that wants this.
[1:01] Speaker 2: You need to be passionate because this could change someone's life.
[1:05] Speaker 1: That's right, yeah. If you've got a matriculant that is
[1:09] Speaker 1: now not sure what they want to do, perhaps this
[1:11] Speaker 1: is what they want to do. How's that for a
[1:15] Speaker 1: lack of scholarship?
[1:16] Speaker 2: Sure.
[1:17] Speaker 1: We've also got 100 liters of diesel. Amazing.
[1:19] Speaker 2: Amazing.
[1:20] Speaker 1: From Deepom Stasi. Thank you, Deepom Stasi.
[1:23] Speaker 2: They always come through for us, eh? Wheel of Joy,
[1:26] Speaker 2: goodness me, we're giving them education, fuel. It's like, what's next?
[1:29] Speaker 2: And remember, Deepom Stasi, they deliver to your door.
[1:34] Speaker 1: 100 litres. I don't know what the storage legalities are,
[1:37] Speaker 1: but did you see some people in Java were storing
[1:39] Speaker 1: diesel in their pool? No.
[1:42] Speaker 2: AI, Darren. Preparing for the worst of it.
[1:46] Speaker 1: In their pool. No.
[1:47] Speaker 2: No.
[1:48] Speaker 1: What are you talking about AI? This is... This is also...
[1:52] Speaker 1: South Africa. South Africa.
[1:54] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[1:54] Speaker 1: Where people have tigers as pets. Oh. Like a fully
[1:59] Speaker 1: grown tiger that you never knew and broke free. And
[2:03] Speaker 1: that's the only reason why we know.
[2:04] Speaker 2: It's giving apocalypse, eh?
[2:06] Speaker 1: South Africa, you never... When you see a story in
[2:09] Speaker 1: South Africa, you never need to go, is that AI?
[2:11] Speaker 1: Because I can guarantee you more likely it's not AI. Mm-hmm. Fair.
[2:19] Speaker 1: It's a true story. Okay, so we've got a whole
[2:22] Speaker 1: bunch of really, really great prizes to the sort of
[2:26] Speaker 1: lash extensions.
[2:28] Speaker 2: Dining experiences, ice cream for a week.
[2:31] Speaker 1: Tickets. Tickets, Alice, okay? You've just got to guess how
[2:34] Speaker 1: many questions I will ask on the senseless survey. So, Sherlyn,
[2:38] Speaker 1: let me start with you. How many questions? 13.
[2:40] Speaker 2: 13.
[2:40] Speaker 1: Sibs?
[2:40] Speaker 2: Ooh, 11. 11, okay. And Rami is not here today.
[2:48] Speaker 1: Producer Brad, how many?
[2:49] Speaker 2: I'll say 10.
[2:50] Speaker 1: 10. Okay. You're all wrong.
[2:52] Speaker 2: Ain't I?
[2:53] Speaker 1: I'll say.
[2:54] Speaker 2: Oh, no plumbing or electrical studies for us. No diesel.
[2:57] Speaker 2: Going to have to hire the people who know what
[2:59] Speaker 2: they're doing. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Okay.
[3:01] Speaker 1: This is where I ask a bunch of random questions.
[3:06] Speaker 1: These are ones that are extracted from the Madelunga Commission,
[3:09] Speaker 1: as you know. Mm-hmm. I steal my questions from the
[3:13] Speaker 1: Madelunga Commission.
[3:14] Speaker 2: And you'll never run out of material. I mean, there's
[3:15] Speaker 2: just so much. There's so much to take from.
[3:17] Speaker 1: Because at the Madelunga Commission, if you've noticed, you never
[3:20] Speaker 1: get a straight answer. So I'm searching for straight answers.
[3:25] Speaker 2: Okay. Okay.
[3:29] Speaker 1: Doing the nation's work. That's all I'm saying. You can
[3:32] Speaker 1: get straight answers because there's no lawyers. Yeah, true that. Yeah.
[3:37] Speaker 2: And if you're wondering when the Midlander Commission will end,
[3:39] Speaker 2: they're saying January 2027. So we've still got a while
[3:45] Speaker 2: to go. As for Senseless Survey, the end does not exist.
[3:50] Speaker 1: Yes. So January 2027, if that's what they say, there
[3:55] Speaker 1: will be an extension. Don't you worry.
[3:58] Speaker 2: Another very South African story.
[4:00] Speaker 1: Because every person that goes up on that stand, they
[4:04] Speaker 1: sort of... implicate another 15 people that they never heard about.
[4:08] Speaker 2: It's a whole new chapter now.
[4:10] Speaker 1: They're like, oh, okay, we've got to follow this lead,
[4:12] Speaker 1: that lead, that lead, that lead. And then at the end,
[4:16] Speaker 1: is anyone going to be prosecuted or is it just
[4:18] Speaker 1: to air? No, Brad, it's just a TV show. Season two.
[4:23] Speaker 1: It's just a TV show. We know how these things work.
[4:25] Speaker 2: You're asking for too much. What do you want? Accountability?
[4:27] Speaker 1: No, it's just like we can tell everything that's happened,
[4:30] Speaker 1: but like then what?
[4:32] Speaker 2: No, I'm with you. If no one has to be accountable,
[4:34] Speaker 2: then what's the point?
[4:35] Speaker 1: No, it's just a TV show. It's like Adels. It's
[4:38] Speaker 1: not about singing. It's about how good it looks on TV. Okay,
[4:44] Speaker 1: so here is this week's senseless survey. Good morning. Good morning, sir.
[4:50] Speaker 1: I'm agent 31962. I'm calling you from the senseless bureau.
[4:54] Speaker 1: I see about 30 seconds of your time to ask
[4:56] Speaker 1: you a couple of questions for your country.
[4:57] Speaker 2: Okay, no problem.
[5:01] Speaker 1: So are threesomes only for sex or can you join
[5:05] Speaker 1: in in a couple's argument as well?
[5:07] Speaker 2: No, no, no.
[5:11] Speaker 1: Do you think a piñata is a great way to
[5:13] Speaker 1: teach kids that if you continually beat something with a stick... Eventually,
[5:19] Speaker 1: you'll get what you want. No, no, no, no, no. So, sir,
[5:27] Speaker 1: if 30s is the new 20s, is 9pm the new 12pm?
[5:31] Speaker 2: I don't know.
[5:35] Speaker 1: After your funeral, would you like someone to take your
[5:37] Speaker 1: phone and WhatsApp everyone, thanks for coming? Yeah. If you
[5:44] Speaker 1: think Gen Z do silly things, might I just remind
[5:48] Speaker 1: you that in 2010, we were planking. No, never did.
[5:55] Speaker 1: Please describe how milk tastes. It tastes like milk. Can
[6:01] Speaker 1: you just elaborate? Yeah, milk is creamy and rich and tastier. Creamy,
[6:10] Speaker 1: rich and tastier. What if fetishes... Or inherited. Like from
[6:15] Speaker 1: your mom or dad.
[6:16] Speaker 2: Put it down, sir. Put it down. I'm entertained, but
[6:30] Speaker 2: you're sick. Hang up. I love how he was thoroughly entertained.
[6:37] Speaker 2: But that's not nice to think about.
[6:41] Speaker 1: It isn't, eh? Especially if you're... Is it hereditary?
[6:45] Speaker 2: Yeah. You're like, mom, is it you? Daddy, is it you?
[6:48] Speaker 2: This foot fetish, where did I get it from?
[6:53] Speaker 1: Did you like that?
[6:56] Speaker 2: No, it's gross, man.
[6:57] Speaker 1: Why are you guys taking it there now?
[6:59] Speaker 2: Darren, Darren, Darren. Remember when you started senseless with like
[7:04] Speaker 2: warm-up questions? I feel as though now we just... We
[7:07] Speaker 2: go straight into it.
[7:09] Speaker 1: No, it gets progressively darker the longer it goes on.
[7:13] Speaker 2: Yeah, sometimes you're like, how many put-down questions can I
[7:15] Speaker 2: cram into one of them?
[7:17] Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what it's all about. So there we go.
[7:21] Speaker 1: We got some answers. All right.

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