# Prank 14 Oct 2026

An episode of [Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1481843603), 14 Oct 2026, 17 min.

Audio: https://traffic.omny.fm/d/clips/5dcefa8e-00a9-4595-8ce1-a4ab0080f142/00ea3494-e70f-4ca4-a74d-aca601166ed5/c2947917-4ecd-4aca-a360-b4e300921091/audio.mp3?utm_source=Podcast&in_playlist=33f66b34-8f1c-4663-a572-aca601179799

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

## Transcript

[0:00] Speaker 1: KFM Mornings with Darren, Sherlyn, Sims and you. It's Coldplay
[0:05] Speaker 1: with BTS, my universe here on KFM Mornings. We're going
[0:09] Speaker 1: to take a quick break and then we are pranking
[0:12] Speaker 1: somebody in the UK.
[0:14] Speaker 2: Stop.
[0:14] Speaker 1: Stop what you're doing. Here is another world famous prank
[0:19] Speaker 1: call from Darren Wackhead Simpson. Exclusive to KFM Mornings. OK,
[0:25] Speaker 1: so before we get into the set up, the nuts
[0:27] Speaker 1: and bolts of the story. I'm going to just show
[0:30] Speaker 1: you what a small world we actually live in. The
[0:35] Speaker 1: world is truly just one big village, right? So this
[0:40] Speaker 1: guy pops me an email from Nigeria wanting me to
[0:43] Speaker 1: prank his best friend who works in the UK as
[0:50] Speaker 1: a nurse. Okay, so this is the end of the
[0:53] Speaker 1: call with me and the guy in Nigeria. We're going
[0:56] Speaker 1: to play the ending before we play the beginning, all right?
[1:03] Speaker 1: Did you get him? I got him good, man. I
[1:06] Speaker 1: got him good.
[1:07] Speaker 3: I've told him about you. I've said things like that.
[1:13] Speaker 3: We never catch him.
[1:15] Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I got him good.
[1:16] Speaker 3: Man, you are the best in the world. Honestly, I
[1:18] Speaker 3: always listen to you. Oh, man.
[1:26] Speaker 1: So tell me, Andre.
[1:28] Speaker 3: He tried the exam three times and it's the final time.
[1:31] Speaker 3: So he thought he was going to fail.
[1:33] Speaker 1: No. So tell me, how did you discover me?
[1:40] Speaker 3: On TikTok.
[1:42] Speaker 1: Oh, so you found me on TikTok?
[1:44] Speaker 3: Brilliant. I don't know how many I've listened to. Every
[1:50] Speaker 3: night I listen to you.
[1:52] Speaker 1: Sure. That's crazy, man.
[1:55] Speaker 3: It's so good to hear your voice. It's so good
[1:57] Speaker 3: to speak to you. Honestly, you are the best in
[2:00] Speaker 3: the world.
[2:00] Speaker 1: Thank you. It's so good to hear that there's people
[2:02] Speaker 1: all over the world listening. Oh, yes.
[2:07] Speaker 3: I'm going to send it to all our friends. I mean,
[2:09] Speaker 3: some of our friends are in America, so I'm going
[2:11] Speaker 3: to send it to them.
[2:12] Speaker 1: Cool, Andre. Take care, man.
[2:15] Speaker 3: Thank you, Ake.
[2:16] Speaker 1: Thank you. Thank you.
[2:17] Speaker 3: You keep up doing your great work.
[2:20] Speaker 1: Thank you very much. And you keep saving lives, man.
[2:26] Speaker 1: So he's a nurse in Nigeria Alright So this is
[2:29] Speaker 1: what happened He says My mate Alex Ayanbeku He has
[2:33] Speaker 1: just written an exam In At the University of London
[2:39] Speaker 1: Oh sounds serious It's very serious He's done the V300
[2:44] Speaker 1: Independent Nurse Prescribing course So I did a bit of
[2:49] Speaker 1: research On this course Alright So he's already a nurse
[2:52] Speaker 1: And then he's this is levels above, you know, and
[2:58] Speaker 1: it's quite a tough course. And he, so basically what
[3:02] Speaker 1: this is, is it's for all already qualified registered nurses, midwives, um,
[3:09] Speaker 1: to prescribe independently or supplementarily within the UK. So this
[3:16] Speaker 1: course does pharmacology, therapeutics, clinical skills, governance and laws, special populations.
[3:21] Speaker 1: The exams are hectic. Apparently, The final exam, you've got
[3:27] Speaker 1: to get minimum 80% overall mark for the mathematical equations
[3:33] Speaker 1: of this is 5 grams of this, 6 grams of that.
[3:36] Speaker 1: You need to get 100% on the mathematical equation. 100%,
[3:41] Speaker 1: no room for error. And it makes sense because the
[3:44] Speaker 1: work is that serious. There are lives at stake.
[3:47] Speaker 4: Absolutely.
[3:47] Speaker 2: Absolutely.
[3:49] Speaker 1: So if they prescribe you 22 milligrams of paracetamol when
[3:52] Speaker 1: you should only have 18, it's a life or death situation,
[3:55] Speaker 1: if you know what I mean, in a different world.
[3:56] Speaker 1: That's why I have respect for pharmacists as well. I mean,
[3:59] Speaker 1: it's precision work. So this is a hectic course and
[4:04] Speaker 1: he's written it and he's come back and he's passed.
[4:09] Speaker 1: Well done. Yes, so he's passed. Now, the other thing
[4:12] Speaker 1: I need to tell you is that we are going
[4:13] Speaker 1: to have a medical discussion here. I've gone and looked
[4:16] Speaker 1: at past papers of this specific exam, okay?
[4:20] Speaker 4: Sure.
[4:20] Speaker 1: And I'm coming in left field with an angle, and
[4:23] Speaker 1: obviously I'm coming in left field with an idea. But,
[4:27] Speaker 1: you must remember, this is medicine. So you had to
[4:32] Speaker 1: prep for this prank a little bit. I had to, yeah.
[4:34] Speaker 1: So I don't even know what I'm talking about. But
[4:37] Speaker 1: this is... Medicine, this is like standing with a doctor.
[4:41] Speaker 1: You know, the doctor, you can talk about anything. Okay?
[4:45] Speaker 1: This is life or death. So we're going to have
[4:48] Speaker 1: a doctor-patient level of conversation here.
[4:52] Speaker 4: All right.
[4:52] Speaker 1: Are you ready for this?
[4:53] Speaker 2: Okay.
[4:54] Speaker 1: Never. Okay, Derek Shepard, let's go. Yeah, here it is.
[4:59] Speaker 3: Hello.
[5:02] Speaker 1: Hello, is this Alex? Yeah. Alex Ayanbeku.
[5:08] Speaker 3: Who is speaking?
[5:09] Speaker 1: My name is Conrad. I'm calling you from the University
[5:12] Speaker 1: of London. You did the V300 nurse prescribing course. Yes, yes. Okay,
[5:19] Speaker 1: and you are aware that you did pass? Yes. Sorry,
[5:23] Speaker 1: you sound a little bit shocked at this phone call.
[5:27] Speaker 4: Ah, because it's your international number, so that's why I'm
[5:31] Speaker 4: just worried with calling internationally.
[5:35] Speaker 1: So the international standards for universities and university courses and structures,
[5:41] Speaker 1: that's where I'm calling you from.
[5:43] Speaker 4: Ah, okay.
[5:44] Speaker 1: All right. We are an oversight committee that handles marking
[5:49] Speaker 1: and checks that there's no corruption in marking and giving
[5:55] Speaker 1: out degrees when they aren't deserved. Do you understand? Okay,
[5:59] Speaker 1: I understand. May I call you Alex or would you prefer...
[6:04] Speaker 1: Nurse Ayan Beku.
[6:07] Speaker 2: Alex is fine.
[6:08] Speaker 1: Alex, okay, Alex. So Alex, let me just explain why
[6:11] Speaker 1: I'm calling quickly. There are concerns from the global body
[6:14] Speaker 1: saying that this exam was way too easy. So we
[6:17] Speaker 1: need to test you as a standardized person that took
[6:21] Speaker 1: the test. And if you do fail the test, then
[6:25] Speaker 1: I'm afraid the whole class is going to fail. So
[6:27] Speaker 1: there's a lot riding on this. We're going to ask
[6:29] Speaker 1: you three questions and you need to get three out
[6:32] Speaker 1: of three. This will be an effective measure to see
[6:35] Speaker 1: whether or not this test was at the global standard
[6:38] Speaker 1: of nursing practice.
[6:42] Speaker 4: Okay.
[6:43] Speaker 1: Okay, so this is a multiple choice question. With drug interactions,
[6:47] Speaker 1: patient taking warfarin asks whether they can take ibuprofen for
[6:54] Speaker 1: back pain. What is the main concern that you would
[6:57] Speaker 1: have as a nurse? Okay.
[7:01] Speaker 4: Warfarin is anticoagulant and ibuprofen is antiplatelet. Both of them
[7:09] Speaker 4: can increase the risk of bleeding.
[7:12] Speaker 2: For the patient. Yes.
[7:14] Speaker 4: I think I have more susceptible to bleeding. The ibuprofen
[7:19] Speaker 4: increased the risk of gastric ulceration, testic ulceration.
[7:26] Speaker 1: The answer I was looking for was increased risk of bleeding.
[7:29] Speaker 1: So you were spot on there. Well done. You do
[7:31] Speaker 1: know your stuff. What is the difference between pharmacokinetics and pharmacodynamics?
[7:42] Speaker 4: Kinetic is what, dynamic is what the body does to
[7:46] Speaker 4: the drug and kinetic is what the drug does to
[7:48] Speaker 4: the body.
[7:49] Speaker 1: Okay, congratulations. You've got two out of two, but you
[7:52] Speaker 1: need three out of three. So you have to get
[7:55] Speaker 1: this next question correct for you and the whole class
[7:59] Speaker 1: to pass the V300 exam. Okay. Final question here. A
[8:06] Speaker 1: man's penis has turned orange.
[8:10] Speaker 4: A man's penis has turned orange.
[8:12] Speaker 1: Yes. How would you get to the bottom of the problem?
[8:17] Speaker 1: What would you ask the patient?
[8:22] Speaker 2: Okay.
[8:29] Speaker 4: I don't know.
[8:31] Speaker 1: Think hard. The class is going to fail because of
[8:33] Speaker 1: you here. Please, please.
[8:36] Speaker 4: See, I don't want the whole class to fail because
[8:39] Speaker 4: of me.
[8:40] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[8:43] Speaker 1: Okay.
[8:45] Speaker 4: Let me think deeply about it. If a patient.
[8:54] Speaker 4: What can I suggest? I don't know what to say.
[9:04] Speaker 1: The whole class is riding on you here, Nurse Alex.
[9:09] Speaker 2: I can ask them if they've asked.
[9:14] Speaker 1: Don't you remember learning this?
[9:18] Speaker 4: Okay. As I say, if you have the... I would
[9:22] Speaker 4: say to hit.
[9:25] Speaker 3: Okay.
[9:25] Speaker 1: So.
[9:43] Speaker 4: I'm not sure. Has the patient taken it?
[9:49] Speaker 1: I think.
[9:52] Speaker 4: A feeling of what is most likely to be that
[9:57] Speaker 4: the patient does. I will have to try to rule
[10:00] Speaker 4: out any STDs going on in there. Have a proper
[10:06] Speaker 4: wash and not getting infection in there, which can make
[10:10] Speaker 4: it cause discoloration on it.
[10:13] Speaker 1: Okay. Because the correct answer is you need to tell
[10:18] Speaker 1: your patient Not to watch Pornhub and eat cheese curls
[10:22] Speaker 1: at the same time.
[10:26] Speaker 3: Oh.
[10:26] Speaker 2: Not to watch porn and eat cheese curls at the
[10:30] Speaker 2: same time.
[10:33] Speaker 1: You got to think of the most obvious first, you know,
[10:36] Speaker 1: before you go into the medical stuff.
[10:41] Speaker 4: Ah.
[10:43] Speaker 1: The whole class is going to fail because of this.
[10:46] Speaker 1: Because it means that the questions, the standardized questioning was
[10:50] Speaker 1: way too easy.
[10:55] Speaker 4: Are you able to give me another question? See if
[10:57] Speaker 4: I can go through with that. Please, please, if you
[11:00] Speaker 4: can give me another question, let's see, because I must
[11:03] Speaker 4: tell you the truth. I didn't just think about the
[11:05] Speaker 4: response to that last question like that. I wasn't thinking
[11:10] Speaker 4: that it's just going to be something as simple as
[11:13] Speaker 4: what the patient is doing that's making the pain easier.
[11:17] Speaker 4: go like that and I was thinking watching porn on
[11:20] Speaker 4: a mini cheese balls will be a restaurant that you
[11:25] Speaker 4: will be looking for you.
[11:27] Speaker 1: See these are the critical skills of a nurse.
[11:31] Speaker 4: I'm really sorry see if you can give me another
[11:34] Speaker 4: question please I'm begging.
[11:36] Speaker 1: You okay how long have you been a nurse.
[11:39] Speaker 4: I qualified in 1999 and I've been a nurse in
[11:41] Speaker 4: the UK since 2005.
[11:47] Speaker 1: And where are you from originally?
[11:50] Speaker 2: Nigeria.
[11:51] Speaker 1: Patient walks in and his penis is blue. He says,
[11:55] Speaker 1: I need some medication. What do you say?
[11:57] Speaker 2: If his penis is blue, I will ask you what
[12:06] Speaker 2: you were doing before.
[12:07] Speaker 4: And I will ask you if you're watching anything, watching
[12:12] Speaker 4: movies or porn when you're doing that. And if it's
[12:16] Speaker 4: what you're eating, probably blueberry or something that can be
[12:24] Speaker 4: of blue color that can make the discoloration come from
[12:28] Speaker 4: your penis. And if you can confirm that, then I
[12:31] Speaker 4: would probably say not to teach yourself if you are
[12:36] Speaker 4: eating anything like that, but wash your hands before you
[12:38] Speaker 4: do things like that. And probably to not... Do you
[12:44] Speaker 4: know Andre Darumola?
[12:46] Speaker 2: Yes. Where's he from?
[12:47] Speaker 4: He's from Nigeria. I'm calling you from South Africa. Okay.
[12:49] Speaker 1: Okay. Your Nigerian friend called me, my name is Waked Simpson,
[13:13] Speaker 1: in South Africa on a radio station to prank you
[13:17] Speaker 1: about your V300 nursing test.
[13:22] Speaker 2: Okay.
[13:24] Speaker 4: You just kill him because I'm going to kill him.
[13:30] Speaker 4: I'm going to kill him.
[13:31] Speaker 1: Okay. So you went through all of.
[13:39] Speaker 2: What sort of prank is this?
[13:40] Speaker 1: What?
[13:41] Speaker 2: My hand is... My palm is sweaty. I'm just thinking,
[13:57] Speaker 2: why would the whole class fail?
[13:59] Speaker 1: What?
[14:00] Speaker 2: Nobody ever told me... What? What? I'm going to kill him.
[14:11] Speaker 2: You're going to hear about his death soon. I'm calling
[14:13] Speaker 2: him on the other phone.
[14:14] Speaker 3: You want it?
[14:15] Speaker 1: Okay.
[14:16] Speaker 2: We should probably hear you now. Speak.
[14:18] Speaker 1: He will hear you. Speak.
[14:21] Speaker 3: Just speak.
[14:21] Speaker 2: Say something.
[14:22] Speaker 1: Is that Andre? Andre, it's Wacky at Simpson.
[14:25] Speaker 3: Andre, can you hear that?
[14:26] Speaker 4: That's Wacky at Simpson.
[14:28] Speaker 2: Oh! Oh!
[14:29] Speaker 4: Oh!
[14:30] Speaker 1: Oh!
[14:41] Speaker 2: You can hear him laughing.
[14:42] Speaker 3: Can you hear him laughing?
[14:44] Speaker 1: I can hear him. I won't fall.
[14:47] Speaker 2: For this again.
[14:50] Speaker 1: Wow.
[14:50] Speaker 3: Too good.
[14:51] Speaker 1: Too good.
[14:51] Speaker 3: Did you enjoy that?
[15:04] Speaker 2: What did I learn?
[15:06] Speaker 1: I said, press pause. Doctors need to be detectives before
[15:12] Speaker 1: they are medical professionals. It's David Guetta with Stickman and
[15:19] Speaker 1: Run Run River on KFM Mornings. I can't wait to
[15:24] Speaker 1: hear these messages.
[15:26] Speaker 4: Darren, Darren, Darren, no man.
[15:29] Speaker 1: Even Kai having a oh, oh, oh.
[15:33] Speaker 4: Ah, the regulation, bro.
[15:41] Speaker 1: What kind of prank is that with this? I'm not
[15:46] Speaker 1: going to fall for this again. Oh, loveness, Alex.
[15:52] Speaker 4: This was excellent.
[15:53] Speaker 1: And Andre's laugh just tops it off. Man, this was
[15:56] Speaker 1: such a good prank this morning. And you know, all
[16:06] Speaker 1: he wanted was his mate to be on TikTok. That's
[16:08] Speaker 1: all he wanted. To go viral on TikTok. Well, make
[16:12] Speaker 1: it go viral. You know, it's crazy though. When I
[16:14] Speaker 1: look at these streaming numbers and you see, you actually
[16:18] Speaker 1: get a geolocation of where the actual code or whatever
[16:22] Speaker 1: is coming from. You know, every day, every day somebody
[16:25] Speaker 1: listens from the Vatican City. Vatican City in the middle
[16:28] Speaker 1: of Rome. Somebody's there listening. Every day you see a
[16:32] Speaker 1: stream come from there. Every day. I don't know who
[16:33] Speaker 1: that person is. Yeah.
[16:35] Speaker 3: But also, some people enjoy the prank like they would
[16:38] Speaker 3: enjoy their favorite TV show.
[16:39] Speaker 2: Like, every day.
[16:41] Speaker 1: Like, it's a comfort. You know, where some of us
[16:43] Speaker 1: are listening every now and then, every week, whatever. So,
[16:46] Speaker 1: it's every day. Like, you're watching Grey's Anatomy. I have
[16:49] Speaker 1: to go to bed, but first let me just see
[16:51] Speaker 1: Wacky's prank.
[16:53] Speaker 2: Okay.
[16:54] Speaker 1: Now we go nighty-boo-boo. And sometimes... The frotter, the better.
[17:00] Speaker 1: And let me guess, those are the ones who get
[17:03] Speaker 1: shared as well. Yeah, it's crazy. It's crazy.

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