# In Loving You, I Learned to Love Myself

An episode of [Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1237931798), 3 Nov 2025, 48 min.

Audio: https://www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/pdst.fm/e/pscrb.fm/rss/p/mgln.ai/e/257/traffic.megaphone.fm/VMP8226441027.mp3?updated=1762139609

She unknowingly changed the course of his life, and he's loved her ever since. It's been decades, and even though he now dates men, he wonders how to live with these feelings of what he calls unrequited love. How do you hold a candle of gratitude for someone who will never know how much they meant to you? Esther Callings are a one time, 45-60 minute interventional phone call with Esther. They are edited for time, clarity, and anonymity. If you have a question you would like to talk through with Esther, send a voice memo to producer@estherperel.com. Also, please join me on Entre Nous, my new home on Substack for anyone who wants to live, love, and work with more connection and imagination. I invite you to sign up and become a free or paid member at estherperel.substack.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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