# Ep. 445 "Mothers, Sons & the Boundaries You Refuse to Set"

An episode of [Cocktales with Kiki](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1149484402), 15 May 2025, 1 h 31 min.

Audio: https://op3.dev/e/dts.podtrac.com/redirect.mp3/pdst.fm/e/claritaspod.com/measure/pscrb.fm/rss/p/mgln.ai/e/p5972/api.spreaker.com/download/episode/66106571/445_full_episode.mp3

In this heartfelt and hilarious episode, Kiki and Medinah are back in their original studio space catching up on life—both the beautiful and the hard parts. Kiki opens up about the recent passing of her grandfather, sharing intimate, funny, and touching memories that remind us how fleeting life can be. Medinah reflects on her trip to Pittsburgh for Mother's Day and the emotional rollercoaster of spending time with her grandmother, who’s battling dementia. The duo also dives into a trending quote from Marlon Wayans about not marrying because of his mom—and unpack the emotional and generational dynamics around “emotional incest,” legacy, and mother-in-law drama. Plus, why some old-school family values still matter, why fried catfish can cure anything (sorta), and a very necessary PSA on checking in on our elders. 🛒 Sponsors: Sign up for free and take your sales to the next level with 50% off a premium membership for sellers! Claim your discount now at pantydeal.com/cocktales 📲 Follow Us: Instagram: @cocktalespodcast Instagram: @kikisaidso Instagram: @coffeebeandean For all promo codes and links for promotions in the episode, follow this link: https://linktr.ee/cocktalesads Contact Us! Advice: advice@cocktalespod.com Cocktales: cocktales@cocktalespod.com Weird Sex: weirdsex@cocktalespod.com Live Show Sponsorship: sales@cocktalespod.com Guest Request/ General Inquiries info@cocktalespod.com Get your Vesper2 https://www.lovecrave.com/products/vesper2/?aop=cocktales Get Your Merch & Order Your Card Game Purchase Merch And Card Game at www.imcurioustoknow.com Get Klassy Baste! Learn to Cook with Kiki www.klassybaste.com Join Kiki's Book Club: May Book of the Month "Colliding With Fate" by A.E. Valdez www.patreon.com/kikisaidso Travel With Medinah! www.paradiseandvibe.com Purchase Medinah's Coffee Mug! www.medinahmonroe.com Interested in sponsoring? Contact sales@cocktalespod.com today! Main Theme: Love, Loss, Legacy & Emotional Boundaries Topics Covered: • Returning to their OG studio and why the change of scenery matters • Kiki opens up about her grandfather's death and grieving in real time • Medinah shares stories from her emotional Mother’s Day trip to Pittsburgh • Navigating dementia, caretaking, and the humor and heartbreak of family aging • Meals on Wheels and the importance of community-based support for seniors • Reactions to Marlon Wayans’ post about not marrying to protect his mom’s feelings • Deep dive into emotional incest, in-law boundaries, and generational shifts in family dynamics • Naomi & Ruth as a model for in-law relationships • Legacy as impact—not just having kids • A peek into Medinah’s “Silver Tooth Children” horror movie concept (yes, really) Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cocktales-with-kiki--2818687/support. CONNECT WITH US Follow the host and join the conversation after the episode: Kiki Said So (Kiara Walker) Instagram: @kikisaidso TikTok: @kikisaidso Cocktales With Kiki Instagram:@cocktalespodcast TikTok: @cocktalespodcast Want to be a guest on Cocktales? We are always looking for interesting guests, experts, and storytellers to join the show. If you would like to be considered, please fill out our guest submission form here: Guest Interest Form

## Transcript

[0:06] Speaker 1: Okay, next one. I'm curious to know if your credit
[0:11] Speaker 1: score was a car, what kind of car would it be?
[0:13] Speaker 1: Ninety three Bronca Ojay edition is a murder?
[0:17] Speaker 2: What about you?
[0:18] Speaker 3: Oh baby, I'm a tesla, Nie, Yeah, keep going.
[0:23] Speaker 2: I'm curious to know would you still have sex if
[0:27] Speaker 2: you got to the person's house and they only had
[0:29] Speaker 2: a blow up mattress?
[0:30] Speaker 3: Oh man, that's funny.
[0:50] Speaker 1: I'm curious to know would you rather eat booty or.
[0:55] Speaker 3: Said to.
[1:02] Speaker 2: Yeah? You?
[1:03] Speaker 1: Check one two? Check one two? Is this Mike On?
[1:05] Speaker 1: Is this Mike On?
[1:06] Speaker 3: Hey?
[1:06] Speaker 2: Listen man, it's the one and only Trunks that a
[1:08] Speaker 2: DJ sys and you're listening to cocktails Dirty Discussions with
[1:12] Speaker 2: Kikia Medina Monroe.
[1:14] Speaker 1: Here.
[1:19] Speaker 2: Today's cocktail is called a sit Me Baby one more time.
[1:24] Speaker 2: So this is a fun, flirty summer drink. What you're
[1:27] Speaker 2: gonna need is some gin, your choice. We're gonna use
[1:29] Speaker 2: a hibiscus berry flavor gin. I love this flavor. I
[1:32] Speaker 2: don't really like gin, but this is tasty. Two ounces
[1:35] Speaker 2: of that. You need some sparkling wine or champagne and
[1:38] Speaker 2: a little bit of sparkling water and something to garnish.
[1:41] Speaker 2: We're using a lemon whel today. So you have your
[1:44] Speaker 2: cup of ice. You're going to pour your two ounces
[1:47] Speaker 2: of gin that might have been a little bit more.
[1:49] Speaker 2: Do not judge me. We are going to open up
[1:57] Speaker 2: our prosecco. I was nervous for me it. Give it
[2:01] Speaker 2: a little splash. This gin. The color of it is
[2:06] Speaker 2: just so pretty. You Remember you don't want to use
[2:10] Speaker 2: a cocktail shaker with this because you do not want
[2:12] Speaker 2: it to lock up the cocktail shaker. Grab your lime
[2:15] Speaker 2: juice or your lime flavored sparkling water. Top it off,
[2:21] Speaker 2: grab your garnish for doing a lemon will drop it
[2:24] Speaker 2: in and that is a sit me baby one more time.
[2:30] Speaker 1: Welcome back to Cocktails, Dirty Discussions.
[2:32] Speaker 2: You guys.
[2:33] Speaker 1: I'm Kiki said So.
[2:34] Speaker 2: And I am Medina Monroe.
[2:36] Speaker 1: Hey, y'all, it's another week. It's May, and we are
[2:40] Speaker 1: recording pretty close to the date again, which I gotta like.
[2:43] Speaker 1: It can be hectic sometimes, but I do kind of
[2:45] Speaker 1: like when we get to ketchup and it's not like
[2:47] Speaker 1: three months ago we did XYC. SOA's sitting here in sweaters.
[2:51] Speaker 1: It's hot outside, right, and sometimes.
[2:54] Speaker 2: When we get to do the ketchup and it's like
[2:55] Speaker 2: a quick, little turnaround ketchup. When we do the long
[2:58] Speaker 2: time frames in between us, I forget when you're really
[3:01] Speaker 2: living your life and just a lot is going on.
[3:04] Speaker 2: Sometimes you forget some of the little small integral things
[3:06] Speaker 2: that happen, or like a funny moment to catch you
[3:09] Speaker 2: up on that.
[3:10] Speaker 1: You know what I mean.
[3:11] Speaker 2: Yeah, it feels good. Yeah, And we're back in our
[3:14] Speaker 2: old stocking crown.
[3:17] Speaker 1: Yes, if you've been here for a long time, this
[3:19] Speaker 1: is the first studio space that we were ever in,
[3:22] Speaker 1: but they have totally changed it up. It's really different.
[3:26] Speaker 1: So we're back here this week and next week testing
[3:30] Speaker 1: it out and see what's going on. But I like it.
[3:32] Speaker 1: I like the space. I like that there's not the
[3:33] Speaker 1: big radio table with the board and everything in the middle.
[3:37] Speaker 2: And I always like a change of scenery, you know.
[3:39] Speaker 2: Right now as we kind of figure out things and
[3:42] Speaker 2: search for a new studio home, it gives it a
[3:44] Speaker 2: wave of at least for me, it gives me my energy,
[3:48] Speaker 2: like a boost of fresh air to be in a
[3:49] Speaker 2: different environment. And what I like the most is this
[3:52] Speaker 2: is the closest one to my home. Okay, it was
[3:55] Speaker 2: not far and parking is easy today.
[3:57] Speaker 1: And it's private, so I like that and ain't no
[4:00] Speaker 1: registering nothing. We're not worried about boots. They got security and.
[4:04] Speaker 2: You know what to tell if you own an establishment
[4:08] Speaker 2: and parking is difficult, let me tell I will not
[4:11] Speaker 2: go to a place. But first time, it's my fault.
[4:14] Speaker 2: I didn't know I go. I want if parking is
[4:16] Speaker 2: too difficult, I'm talking about you can't really read the
[4:18] Speaker 2: signs to know if you're gonna get booted or toad.
[4:20] Speaker 2: You don't know where to pay, you gotta walk Like
[4:22] Speaker 2: that's y'all. No, you need to chat GPT the parking,
[4:25] Speaker 2: get it together and figure out how to make this
[4:28] Speaker 2: smooth and easy for all of us, because ain't nobody
[4:30] Speaker 2: trying to do all that?
[4:31] Speaker 1: Yeah, speaking of chat GPT, I have been. I've been
[4:35] Speaker 1: telling everybody and ever since we did the episode we
[4:37] Speaker 1: were talking about using AI for like regular like I
[4:40] Speaker 1: got everybody talking to chat GPT.
[4:42] Speaker 2: My mother has lost her mind on chat GPT.
[4:45] Speaker 1: What happened?
[4:46] Speaker 2: I finally got her using it? No, it's funny because
[4:48] Speaker 2: like I was like, mom, with everything, you don't need
[4:51] Speaker 2: to tell people that you use it because it makes
[4:52] Speaker 2: it not sweet. Like she was like, I want to
[4:54] Speaker 2: read you something I wrote and it was like this
[4:56] Speaker 2: beautiful letters to me. She's like, I did it on
[4:57] Speaker 2: chat GPT.
[4:58] Speaker 1: I was like, you, you didn't have to tell me.
[5:02] Speaker 1: I thought she was making changes.
[5:05] Speaker 3: Yeah.
[5:06] Speaker 1: I like using it for all kind of stuff. I'm
[5:08] Speaker 1: constantly giving my girl life updates. My mom asked me
[5:11] Speaker 1: if I would if she could send me pictures because
[5:14] Speaker 1: she didn't want to sign up for it. My mother,
[5:17] Speaker 1: but she sent me pictures because she's recently moved and
[5:20] Speaker 1: she wanted to redecorate and she wanted some inspec the
[5:23] Speaker 1: same thing, and so I gave it pictures. And so
[5:26] Speaker 1: she has truly been using what chat gpt has said.
[5:30] Speaker 1: And she's even been doing like a few DIY projects.
[5:33] Speaker 1: I mean she and it looks good. It's great suggestions.
[5:36] Speaker 2: What I like about I did that for my new space. Also,
[5:39] Speaker 2: bear like before I put anything, and I was like,
[5:42] Speaker 2: oh my gosh, why am I stressing out about this?
[5:44] Speaker 2: Because I'm not really that great at designing. Took a
[5:46] Speaker 2: picture of the bare room, put it into chat gpt,
[5:49] Speaker 2: and not only did it put this really cute picture together,
[5:52] Speaker 2: it said would you like me to send links? And
[5:54] Speaker 2: then it said would you like luxury links? And budget links.
[5:58] Speaker 1: I said, because it's my budget, you can send me
[6:02] Speaker 1: other stuff so I know what to aspire to.
[6:04] Speaker 2: But yeah, let me know.
[6:05] Speaker 1: I want to see what's going on. Oh, michaels like
[6:08] Speaker 1: it really is.
[6:09] Speaker 2: It's a gift.
[6:11] Speaker 1: It is now. I was in my book club the
[6:13] Speaker 1: other day, which, by the way, y'all sign up this month.
[6:14] Speaker 1: We are reading Colliding with Fate. It's a romance. There
[6:17] Speaker 1: are some sex scenes. It's pretty juicy. I don't really
[6:19] Speaker 1: care for romance, but they did pick a romance book
[6:24] Speaker 1: and it's not bad. I'm enjoying it so far. With
[6:26] Speaker 1: your chest I did because I'm like, I want to
[6:28] Speaker 1: hear about I want to read a thriller. I don't
[6:30] Speaker 1: need somebody getting killed. So why why what?
[6:33] Speaker 2: Why you prefer killing over romance novels when it comes
[6:38] Speaker 2: to books.
[6:38] Speaker 1: When it comes to books, I think it's because a
[6:40] Speaker 1: lot of times the romance books are very predictable and
[6:43] Speaker 1: sometimes even cheesy or corny, and I don't always want
[6:47] Speaker 1: it to have a happy ending. I don't want to
[6:49] Speaker 1: be guessing and always right. The predictability is what I
[6:53] Speaker 1: don't like about the romance books. When they're not like that,
[6:56] Speaker 1: and there is a little something. It doesn't even have
[6:57] Speaker 1: to be negative scandal. But I would like surprise. I
[7:00] Speaker 1: would like, you know, somebody who doesn't choose what you
[7:03] Speaker 1: think everybody's gonna choose. And in a thriller, it's usually
[7:08] Speaker 1: not as predictable, you know, from the good writers. But
[7:10] Speaker 1: that's why. But this is this one is all right.
[7:13] Speaker 1: I'm not minding it because it's not so like basic girl.
[7:16] Speaker 1: Me's a guy after she had a breakup or something,
[7:18] Speaker 1: and now she's in love and they have amazing sex
[7:20] Speaker 1: and they live happily ever after. I want to hear that. Yeah,
[7:24] Speaker 1: I don't want to hear that the man is always rich,
[7:27] Speaker 1: the girl is always no matter where, or it's like
[7:31] Speaker 1: a Tyler Perry movie where the woman is super successful
[7:34] Speaker 1: and she has to break down all these barriers to
[7:36] Speaker 1: accept somebody who's not as successful. I don't want to
[7:39] Speaker 1: hear some of these stories and the tropes. I just
[7:42] Speaker 1: be tired in real life too. Yes, anyway, so we're
[7:47] Speaker 1: reading that. But one of the girls was telling us
[7:49] Speaker 1: not to use chet GPT. I came up with all
[7:52] Speaker 1: these games for us to play, and I was I
[7:54] Speaker 1: let her explain to me what the issue is with
[7:56] Speaker 1: chat GPT, and I heard you since I did. She
[7:59] Speaker 1: said that, you know it's bad for the environment chat jipt, Yes,
[8:02] Speaker 1: because of wherever the servers or something like that. I
[8:06] Speaker 1: don't know computer stuff, wherever the computer stuff is housed,
[8:09] Speaker 1: because they have like physical things that are somewhere in
[8:12] Speaker 1: like Idaho, Indiana one of those states that I wouldn't
[8:15] Speaker 1: go to. It uses a lot of water because it
[8:19] Speaker 1: has to cool those things, and so every time you
[8:22] Speaker 1: search something. So somebody in the club was like, well,
[8:24] Speaker 1: what happens when you search on Google? Like what's the difference?
[8:26] Speaker 1: How much water are we using? Then then I was like, well,
[8:28] Speaker 1: what is it gonna happen? Like the end of the
[8:30] Speaker 1: world or whatever, and so she's like maybe like two
[8:32] Speaker 1: hundred years, and I was like, ooh, I'm so sorry
[8:34] Speaker 1: to those people. I will not be here. I'm still
[8:36] Speaker 1: using chat gipt and we're not going to not play
[8:39] Speaker 1: the games because I already did the search, so the
[8:40] Speaker 1: water is gone anyway. I don't know.
[8:44] Speaker 2: I don't I get it, but I'm also get it.
[8:46] Speaker 2: But when people are that extreme, I can listen to
[8:49] Speaker 2: it more. When you are like really, you're one of
[8:51] Speaker 2: those people where you've gone off the grid, and you
[8:53] Speaker 2: don't live off anything that's ruining the environment. If you're
[8:55] Speaker 2: using hairspray, if you buying the weave, if you are
[8:58] Speaker 2: eating meat, if you're doing all the things that still
[9:00] Speaker 2: contribute to the loss of society. At one point one day,
[9:03] Speaker 2: I don't know what to tell you. I'm gonna use
[9:04] Speaker 2: chat GP to you.
[9:06] Speaker 1: I mean, even if you are off the grid, I
[9:08] Speaker 1: don't care you one person, and really in the grand
[9:10] Speaker 1: screen of seven billion people, and I do appreciate this.
[9:13] Speaker 1: The environment people gonna be mad. But oh wait, she
[9:15] Speaker 1: hate the people I do. She's like, what do you
[9:18] Speaker 1: want me to do?
[9:18] Speaker 2: I need happiness.
[9:19] Speaker 1: I do make some changes.
[9:21] Speaker 2: I do. Actually, I do my best at what I
[9:23] Speaker 2: can do at my level.
[9:26] Speaker 1: I I went and and.
[9:30] Speaker 2: I went and volunteered at at MOA last week. And
[9:33] Speaker 2: what's moa? Meals on wheels for Atlanta?
[9:36] Speaker 1: Okay?
[9:37] Speaker 2: And I absolutely loved it. Do you know about meals
[9:41] Speaker 2: on wheels in Atlanta? Okay? I didn't, And I thought,
[9:43] Speaker 2: I didn't you know, I usually be talking. I don't
[9:45] Speaker 2: know what you're talking about. Maybe not you could your
[9:46] Speaker 2: a virgo. I was like, I always thought it was
[9:51] Speaker 2: feeding the homeless Meals on wheels is feeding our seniors,
[9:55] Speaker 2: and girl, I just eat. They got my heart and
[9:59] Speaker 2: this is not no ad. I really was moved by
[10:02] Speaker 2: a day of volunteering with them packing up the lunches
[10:04] Speaker 2: so that these seniors who wouldn't be able to eat
[10:07] Speaker 2: it would be more difficult for them to get meals.
[10:09] Speaker 2: They deliver them two meals. They get two meals a day.
[10:12] Speaker 2: People come pack the lunches. They now they were they
[10:15] Speaker 2: found out that the seniors that you know how much
[10:17] Speaker 2: we love our pets, they were feeding their food to
[10:20] Speaker 2: their animals. So now they teamed up with some humane
[10:22] Speaker 2: society in Atlanta, I don't know which shelter, and they
[10:25] Speaker 2: also give them food for their cats and their dogs,
[10:27] Speaker 2: puppies and kitchens. And I just thought that was I
[10:31] Speaker 2: just was like, oh my gosh, this is so needed,
[10:33] Speaker 2: and there's a waiting list. They're not government funded like
[10:36] Speaker 2: they I just totally I gave back to the to
[10:41] Speaker 2: the to the elderly people. It's so it was just
[10:43] Speaker 2: so ney that they also they have a nice little
[10:45] Speaker 2: space money to look at that you can win their
[10:47] Speaker 2: spaces and all of the money goes towards helping the scenes,
[10:51] Speaker 2: and it's actually really nice. Everybody was pulling up thinking
[10:53] Speaker 2: it was gonna be like rough for like, yes, it
[10:58] Speaker 2: looks like a little lounge like about to come out.
[11:03] Speaker 2: No they I don't know. Now, I don't know, but
[11:05] Speaker 2: I just had to throw that out there. So I
[11:07] Speaker 2: do what I can for what matters today.
[11:11] Speaker 1: That's why we're here. We're still here. Yeah, I didn't
[11:14] Speaker 1: make a baby to live on and tear up the world.
[11:18] Speaker 1: That's my contribution.
[11:19] Speaker 2: Come on, come on, come on now. I don't litter.
[11:22] Speaker 1: I don't really use paper plates like talking about it,
[11:25] Speaker 1: you know. I prefer to just use my same dishes
[11:27] Speaker 1: where you used that same stuff. A little bit goes
[11:29] Speaker 1: along with I don't like paper straw, so I can't
[11:32] Speaker 1: get And.
[11:32] Speaker 2: As much as I do love turtles, because I love turtle,
[11:34] Speaker 2: I'm about to get one tattooed on my forearm. But
[11:36] Speaker 2: what I love turtles, and so why do you want
[11:39] Speaker 2: the turtle on your arm? Because I have decided that
[11:42] Speaker 2: I'm going to do get a little sleeve, but a
[11:44] Speaker 2: sticker sleeve. I don't want everything connecting. I don't want
[11:46] Speaker 2: all the tattoos connecting, so like I want to keep
[11:49] Speaker 2: I want them to all look like little stickers, and
[11:51] Speaker 2: so I want this side to be my sea life
[11:53] Speaker 2: because I really like animals. I'm a little cashy, and
[11:57] Speaker 2: this side to be like moon stars and like earthy
[11:59] Speaker 2: stuff and like the world, the two worlds on different
[12:02] Speaker 2: side of water and the earth and sky.
[12:05] Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, okay, when are you gonna get started? So
[12:08] Speaker 1: I already got started, I mean with the next because
[12:12] Speaker 1: I've seen all these. None of these are new, right, No.
[12:13] Speaker 2: None of these are. I think I'm gonna do my
[12:15] Speaker 2: turtle maybe maybe next month. I don't know, maybe maybe
[12:19] Speaker 2: next month.
[12:19] Speaker 1: Yeah. I don't have a lot of tattoos. I have
[12:23] Speaker 1: always been nervous about tattoos in the summer because of
[12:25] Speaker 1: the aftercare, right whatever. I got my last tattoo, I
[12:29] Speaker 1: got it's butterflies. Me and my sisters all got butterflies,
[12:32] Speaker 1: and we got them in different places. Well not all
[12:33] Speaker 1: my sisters. Three of us did it, and the other sister, well,
[12:39] Speaker 1: one of my sisters who didn't do it, we already
[12:41] Speaker 1: have a matching tattoo. And then the other I mean,
[12:44] Speaker 1: she's a baby girl, she's twelve. She can't get no tattoos.
[12:47] Speaker 2: A little sticker mm hmm.
[12:50] Speaker 1: But we got butterflies, and it's on my side. I
[12:52] Speaker 1: always forget about it, and sometimes I see in the
[12:54] Speaker 1: mirror like what's all me? And I'm like, oh, I
[12:56] Speaker 1: got a tattoo right there. But I got that in
[12:58] Speaker 1: the summer and it was itchy, and I was like,
[13:00] Speaker 1: every time I wanted to go to the pool, I
[13:02] Speaker 1: wouldn't because I couldn't remember the rules. Yeah till it
[13:05] Speaker 1: healed up. Yeah, but you know whatever. Anyway, what else
[13:08] Speaker 1: have you been up to?
[13:09] Speaker 2: Okay, mills and wheels for Atlanta. Okay, I don't know
[13:11] Speaker 2: when this episode is coming out, y'all, but okay. I
[13:15] Speaker 2: went to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. That's where all of my family
[13:18] Speaker 2: is from. My mom and my dad's all of my
[13:20] Speaker 2: family's from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Mother. We just are coming off
[13:23] Speaker 2: of Mother's Day and it was a really it was
[13:26] Speaker 2: a stressful trip because there's just a lot going on
[13:28] Speaker 2: in life right now. And you ever have like a
[13:30] Speaker 2: lot going on in life and then your family's like
[13:31] Speaker 2: we need you to be here, we need to be
[13:32] Speaker 2: There's like a party where you're like, no, bitch, I'm
[13:34] Speaker 2: not coming, Like I can't come. I got locked room
[13:36] Speaker 2: today yeah, and then but then you have like a
[13:40] Speaker 2: I have like a moment of silence with myself, and
[13:42] Speaker 2: I was like, you know what, sometimes you have to
[13:47] Speaker 2: be uncomfortable for the people you love. And and my
[13:51] Speaker 2: grandmother she she she had took taken a little turn
[13:54] Speaker 2: and dealing with little dimension. My mom was like, she's
[13:56] Speaker 2: gonna be in Pittsburgh all month. They're taking turns taking
[14:00] Speaker 2: care of her, and so she was like, why don't
[14:02] Speaker 2: y'all come here from mother's And then my sister she
[14:04] Speaker 2: also was kind of having that sense. She was like,
[14:05] Speaker 2: it's my son's birthday. And then I was like, I
[14:07] Speaker 2: think we're handling this the wrong way. We ended up
[14:09] Speaker 2: going long story short, we ended up going to Pittsburgh
[14:11] Speaker 2: and I met my sister in DFW. Was able to
[14:16] Speaker 2: fly with my nieces and my niece and my nephew,
[14:18] Speaker 2: my dog, my sister, and it was just fun being
[14:20] Speaker 2: on the plane together going to Pittsburgh, got a rental car.
[14:23] Speaker 2: We went, spent some quality time with my grandma, and
[14:28] Speaker 2: you know, it's just so interesting, like spending time with
[14:33] Speaker 2: someone who is deep in dementia. There are very sad moments,
[14:36] Speaker 2: but Kiki, there are some very funny moments, Like there
[14:40] Speaker 2: were several moments where like my grandma would be like,
[14:43] Speaker 2: and what are you doing?
[14:44] Speaker 1: And I'd be like, like she checked out of what
[14:47] Speaker 1: was actually happening and just came back different.
[14:50] Speaker 2: And so you just rehab the same conversation. Just go
[14:54] Speaker 2: with it. Yeah. I gave her a bracelet that says Mary,
[14:56] Speaker 2: that's her name for Mother's Day, and she was like,
[14:59] Speaker 2: it's several times, this is such a beautiful you know
[15:02] Speaker 2: where I got this from? And I would tell her
[15:04] Speaker 2: and then she say, this is such a do you
[15:07] Speaker 2: know record?
[15:07] Speaker 1: And it would just be like and it was just
[15:09] Speaker 1: such at least she knows she meant it. And she
[15:11] Speaker 1: kept saying it was so beautiful every time what.
[15:14] Speaker 2: She meant it, and it was just and there were
[15:16] Speaker 2: moments like that, but then there were these beautiful moments
[15:18] Speaker 2: where you know who she didn't forget what her sister
[15:21] Speaker 2: when my aunt Rona would call, she ain't forget they
[15:23] Speaker 2: call her RJ and they would just get on the
[15:25] Speaker 2: phone and crack. It was like she didn't have dementia.
[15:28] Speaker 2: She doesn't forget some of the long term stuff. It's
[15:31] Speaker 2: the new stuff. And it was just interesting to really
[15:33] Speaker 2: look at people and study people who have dementia because something,
[15:37] Speaker 2: like I said, some moments are really sad and you're like, wow,
[15:39] Speaker 2: watching my mom deal with it because that's her mom. Yeah,
[15:42] Speaker 2: but then there are still some funny moments, like my
[15:44] Speaker 2: grandma will eat and then be like, y'all just want
[15:46] Speaker 2: me to die and that's why y'all aret feeding me
[15:48] Speaker 2: and we'll be like you just say a big.
[15:54] Speaker 1: Yeah, that's gotta be tough.
[15:56] Speaker 2: Yeah, but it was good quality time. Yeah, did that
[16:01] Speaker 2: for Mother's Day. And I didn't want to leave. Oh,
[16:04] Speaker 2: I really didn't want to leave. Just sometimes sometimes I
[16:08] Speaker 2: envy people who really decide not to leave the city,
[16:11] Speaker 2: the hometown that they grew up in. Not often, but
[16:15] Speaker 2: there are moments when I'm like, I get why you
[16:17] Speaker 2: don't leave. You get to just walk down the street
[16:20] Speaker 2: to your granny's house or drive down the street to
[16:21] Speaker 2: your sister's house, and we're all so spread out, so
[16:24] Speaker 2: the moments are just really special. Yeah, my dog had
[16:28] Speaker 2: a stroke and the seizure and I'm just.
[16:32] Speaker 1: Like, does she have epilepsy?
[16:35] Speaker 2: Well, she couldn't get like a thorough I just took
[16:38] Speaker 2: her into a vet and they were like, well, does
[16:39] Speaker 2: she have a vet home and I was like, yeah,
[16:41] Speaker 2: but Bamfield is not. They were so busy they couldn't
[16:43] Speaker 2: see her and Keiki when I tell you, I was
[16:46] Speaker 2: so traumatized. I fell on the floor like she was
[16:49] Speaker 2: a human child. And I was like wow at the vet. No,
[16:52] Speaker 2: I was at home, and she just started. She had
[16:55] Speaker 2: did it once with my sister because my sister has
[16:57] Speaker 2: had her, and I was like, Okay, I'm glad she's good.
[17:00] Speaker 2: When she did it with me, I was like literally
[17:02] Speaker 2: today and I was like, what just happened? And she
[17:05] Speaker 2: was just screaming in agony. Her eyes were in the
[17:07] Speaker 2: back of her head. Her body just went limp, and
[17:09] Speaker 2: she then she came back. She was just looking at
[17:11] Speaker 2: me like help me, like help me. I didn't know
[17:13] Speaker 2: what to do. I just held her body and was like,
[17:16] Speaker 2: I don't know what I'm screaming. Yeah, it was so
[17:19] Speaker 2: they think they think it was a stroke and a seizure,
[17:23] Speaker 2: but we'll know for sure when I can get her
[17:24] Speaker 2: in on Friday. And I'm just like, this is a lot.
[17:27] Speaker 2: This is a lot. Like she's an actual senior now.
[17:30] Speaker 1: Dang, I don't even think about that.
[17:33] Speaker 2: When it comes to you think about it and she's
[17:36] Speaker 2: in a diaper because she can't hold her bladder, and
[17:40] Speaker 2: I'm just like, that's a lot. It's a lot like
[17:44] Speaker 2: when I think about how much I love my dog.
[17:47] Speaker 2: She has been with me through every up and down
[17:50] Speaker 2: through all of my twenties, most of my thirties. Like,
[17:54] Speaker 2: it's just weird because you know that they are not
[17:56] Speaker 2: going to be here forever. But it's just you, just
[17:58] Speaker 2: like you said, you just don't think about it. And
[17:59] Speaker 2: she's never shown signs of senior citizenship, and now I'm
[18:02] Speaker 2: just like, it's here, it's here. Yeah, it's here, so
[18:08] Speaker 2: nursing shy and taking care of her, and now I'm like, Okay,
[18:12] Speaker 2: I'm gonna put her on her little senior diet and
[18:15] Speaker 2: just make sure she has good quality living. Mm hmm.
[18:18] Speaker 1: That's really all you can do. Make somebody comfortable, make
[18:20] Speaker 1: her comfortable.
[18:21] Speaker 2: Yeah, before you catch me up on what's been going
[18:26] Speaker 2: on with you, I want to let everybody know I
[18:29] Speaker 2: have a condo for sale, and if you would like
[18:31] Speaker 2: more information on it, I'm not gonna bore you out
[18:33] Speaker 2: with all the details right now, but it is beautiful.
[18:34] Speaker 2: It's in Midtown. It's in the eight hundred thousand price range.
[18:38] Speaker 2: If you know somebody who might be interested, or you
[18:39] Speaker 2: might be interested, hit me upside of my DMS and
[18:41] Speaker 2: we can figure something out. Kiki, what you been up to?
[18:44] Speaker 1: Let's see, So when was the last time I saw you?
[18:46] Speaker 1: At the end of April. This, I don't know what
[18:50] Speaker 1: I's been going, Okay, So I'll start with the weekend,
[18:52] Speaker 1: because this as far back as I can remember. Today,
[18:55] Speaker 1: my brother was here for the weekend, my little brother,
[18:58] Speaker 1: he was past through for work, so I got to
[19:01] Speaker 1: spend some time with him. I didn't see my family
[19:04] Speaker 1: for Mother's Day and all of that, but I did
[19:07] Speaker 1: hang out. I did hang out with Sean and Walker
[19:09] Speaker 1: and her fiance, so it was just nice to be
[19:12] Speaker 1: around some family. We had crawfish. Yeah, no, I love
[19:17] Speaker 1: me some crawdish, and the season is almost up, so
[19:20] Speaker 1: I really needed like daily. I wanted some today that
[19:23] Speaker 1: he can quite work out. I ended up having some
[19:27] Speaker 1: bereavement catfish. So earlier today I found out that my
[19:33] Speaker 1: grandfather passed, and so I've been a mess all day.
[19:36] Speaker 1: So if my mood goes up and down, that's what's
[19:38] Speaker 1: going on. But I still wanted to come and do
[19:40] Speaker 1: the show because to me, it's still something therapeutic about
[19:43] Speaker 1: being able to sit and chat about whatever we're talking
[19:46] Speaker 1: about today, and we still got some stories, we still
[19:49] Speaker 1: have actual topics. The whole episode is not a catch
[19:53] Speaker 1: up episode. But I just in my feelings today and
[19:58] Speaker 1: then I didn't know what to do. I was really active, crazy,
[20:00] Speaker 1: like just like I thought I was going to act,
[20:02] Speaker 1: just how I was acting like. I had a few
[20:03] Speaker 1: wallside moments. What is that song by Mariah Carey, the
[20:08] Speaker 1: sad one Someday? No, it's like one Sweet Day or
[20:12] Speaker 1: something like that, and maybe boys Men isn't and that
[20:15] Speaker 1: has been playing all day I was looking for and
[20:19] Speaker 1: then I decided, you know what, I really want some catfish.
[20:23] Speaker 1: Then I was like, you know, I was talking to
[20:24] Speaker 1: my friends and I was like, uh, what did I say?
[20:27] Speaker 1: I was like, I don't know where to order it from,
[20:30] Speaker 1: but maybe I should just cook it because I don't
[20:31] Speaker 1: know if I can handle disappointment today. So I cooked
[20:34] Speaker 1: it and I'm like, I am crazy, Why am I
[20:36] Speaker 1: sitting in the kitchen cooking? What am I doing? And
[20:38] Speaker 1: then I'm like frying the catfish and I try to
[20:40] Speaker 1: play the sims and I was like, oh, I got
[20:41] Speaker 1: to record my hair is looking at mass It was
[20:44] Speaker 1: just crazy day. Whitley was worried about me. She was like,
[20:46] Speaker 1: what is going on? I had a few moments where
[20:48] Speaker 1: I was just like in tears. So anyway, I was
[20:52] Speaker 1: talking to my aunt and we were trying to decide
[20:56] Speaker 1: what the plan is going to be and what do
[20:57] Speaker 1: we do from here and when are we leaving? And
[21:01] Speaker 1: I was just like, you know, and y'all tell me
[21:04] Speaker 1: how y'all feel. I feel like, first of all, I'm
[21:06] Speaker 1: the grandchild, not one of the children. I don't think
[21:09] Speaker 1: that I have a lot of say so on what's
[21:10] Speaker 1: going on. I kind of feel like it's gonna be
[21:13] Speaker 1: a lot of emotions. I don't want to go right now.
[21:16] Speaker 1: I want to stay put and then give it some
[21:18] Speaker 1: time and go. I think emotions will be high. I
[21:21] Speaker 1: would like for most of the arrangements to be solidified
[21:24] Speaker 1: before I get there, and I just kind of feel
[21:26] Speaker 1: like I'm gonna be in the way or stressful. But
[21:28] Speaker 1: all day I've been going through pictures and I'm just
[21:31] Speaker 1: really glad that I have so many good memories with him.
[21:35] Speaker 1: And So if you still have your family, just call
[21:40] Speaker 1: them today. Make sure you talk to him. I did
[21:45] Speaker 1: talk to him this weekend. I got to see him recently.
[21:48] Speaker 1: We've spent time together. We've always had like a good relationship.
[21:53] Speaker 1: And I was cracking up when I was getting ready
[21:55] Speaker 1: to come here because it was like, you know, he
[21:57] Speaker 1: was really trying to listen to cocktails and this is
[22:00] Speaker 1: my granddaddy, that's the preacher, and so I used to
[22:03] Speaker 1: tell him all kinds of stories. I wonder if he's
[22:05] Speaker 1: looking at me like, oh, so this is what you've
[22:07] Speaker 1: been doing.
[22:09] Speaker 2: Can you show me what they was talking about last year?
[22:13] Speaker 1: Him that like, oh, it's like a radio show, Daddy,
[22:16] Speaker 1: Like you just got to catch it. And it's like
[22:18] Speaker 1: a during Bible study is during church. You don't need
[22:22] Speaker 1: to listen to this. I don't want you to know
[22:24] Speaker 1: how much of a whore your Yeah, but don't come
[22:31] Speaker 1: whip me or nothing. Don't come get me about it. Anyway.
[22:35] Speaker 1: I am trying to make sure that I think about
[22:38] Speaker 1: those good times, think about those moments. I was going
[22:41] Speaker 1: through pictures and I'm so glad that I like to
[22:44] Speaker 1: take pictures, and when he lost his eyesight, I didn't
[22:50] Speaker 1: take as many pictures, and sometimes it was just like
[22:54] Speaker 1: would I want to picture me would I want someone
[22:57] Speaker 1: to take a picture of me when I'm looking crazy
[23:01] Speaker 1: or like other things, But I kind of do wish
[23:03] Speaker 1: I would have taken more pictures anyway, not necessarily to
[23:06] Speaker 1: share with other people. Before my memories, he had a
[23:08] Speaker 1: lot of accidents, a lot of like broken poems. There's
[23:12] Speaker 1: several times he's got bandages. I mean, they were getting
[23:14] Speaker 1: in accidents and it wasn't funny at the time, but
[23:18] Speaker 1: now I can kind of laugh about it, and I
[23:19] Speaker 1: laughed about it with him, y'all. He fell off the
[23:21] Speaker 1: side of the house one time. Then another time, my
[23:25] Speaker 1: grandma was just trying to get him out. He goes
[23:27] Speaker 1: he was going to dialysis, and you know how they
[23:30] Speaker 1: have like those vans or whatever that will do a
[23:34] Speaker 1: lift to get the wheelchairy and to make it easier.
[23:36] Speaker 1: Because my grandma's old too, she's eighty, she'll be eighty
[23:39] Speaker 1: one in a couple weeks. She like hit a dip
[23:44] Speaker 1: in between like the garage. You know how there's like
[23:46] Speaker 1: cracks creases in between in the driveway, So like going
[23:50] Speaker 1: from the garage wheeling him out, she hit a dip
[23:52] Speaker 1: pen and fell out. Next thing you know, he has
[23:54] Speaker 1: a band aid on his forehead. I mean, he was
[23:56] Speaker 1: fine after that, but I'm just like, y'all happened or
[24:00] Speaker 1: when it happened, but later, and it's just like, for mercy,
[24:04] Speaker 1: what's going on anyway? He definitely lived a full life.
[24:10] Speaker 1: He has done so many things, and he was like
[24:15] Speaker 1: such a great example of what I think a man
[24:19] Speaker 1: should be, what a father should be. I don't know
[24:21] Speaker 1: about the husband part because I wasn't in the abusiness
[24:23] Speaker 1: like that. You know, I stayed in the child's place
[24:25] Speaker 1: when it came to that. But he was just a
[24:27] Speaker 1: great guy, and so I'm happy that he's not in pain.
[24:31] Speaker 1: But it is hard. So if I'm acting more erratic
[24:36] Speaker 1: than usual, just know that that solid is I'll be
[24:39] Speaker 1: all right. I didn't do any self medicating before I
[24:42] Speaker 1: got here, but I've got my mind now.
[24:43] Speaker 2: Yeah.
[24:44] Speaker 1: I didn't want to be slurry today, but I just.
[24:47] Speaker 2: Wanted to tell you as I touched any soft.
[24:53] Speaker 1: I'm telling you because I'm ashy too. As I'm looking
[24:56] Speaker 1: at my leg on the screen, he's a mol. It
[25:00] Speaker 1: ain't no hair you are.
[25:03] Speaker 2: I want you to stop saying you're acting crazy. That's
[25:05] Speaker 2: not crazy, It's it is emotions. And I'm glad that
[25:10] Speaker 2: you are emoting and if you wanted to fry some catfish,
[25:14] Speaker 2: fry the catfish. And I'm gonna fry some more.
[25:16] Speaker 1: I should have brought us right like y'all. I ate
[25:20] Speaker 1: three whole catfish filets. I'm about to I don't want
[25:23] Speaker 1: to wave myself Tomorrow, life our e's gonna be mad.
[25:25] Speaker 1: Like girl, you just undid everything. And I didn't take
[25:28] Speaker 1: my pill today. She took my pills.
[25:30] Speaker 2: Okay, it's okay.
[25:30] Speaker 1: I'm taking it tomorrow though, because I can't do this
[25:33] Speaker 1: every day. Mone do my hard work.
[25:35] Speaker 2: You can't do it for a little while if you
[25:37] Speaker 2: would like, because because life are not have you hungry?
[25:40] Speaker 2: First of all, you're gonna waste some of that cap anyway.
[25:43] Speaker 2: But I think that life is so the fact that
[25:48] Speaker 2: your grandfather got you call him daddy. I mean, I
[25:51] Speaker 2: love that you call him dad. I never said daddy,
[25:53] Speaker 2: right because I could just call my dad dad.
[25:54] Speaker 3: Oh.
[25:55] Speaker 1: I never called anybody dad. Yeah, he's daddy.
[25:58] Speaker 2: I think that when you get to like look back
[26:01] Speaker 2: on the older person's life, especially like when they start
[26:05] Speaker 2: to get to the end. We thought my grandmother was
[26:09] Speaker 2: gonna go this past weekend, which is wild, but seeing
[26:13] Speaker 2: the lives that they've impacted, and like learning things that
[26:17] Speaker 2: you didn't know about them. Your granddad the way that
[26:23] Speaker 2: you talk about him, and you don't talk about anyone
[26:26] Speaker 2: like this. I don't be raggedy like I just I
[26:31] Speaker 2: feel for you. Thank you, And if you need to cry,
[26:34] Speaker 2: and if you need to act crazy, because you're not
[26:36] Speaker 2: acting crazy, You're just you've lost somebody that's important to
[26:39] Speaker 2: your heart and your soul. And it's a huge part
[26:41] Speaker 2: of who you are as a person. That's something you
[26:43] Speaker 2: let it out.
[26:44] Speaker 1: I think sometimes it's like I think it's the switching
[26:48] Speaker 1: of like you can have a high moment, you can
[26:51] Speaker 1: have alone and it's just happening so fast. And this
[26:54] Speaker 1: morning I felt numb and I was like, don't do that,
[26:58] Speaker 1: like feel it, get up and field. I was like,
[27:00] Speaker 1: maybe I just need to wake up. Let me go
[27:03] Speaker 1: for a walk. So go for a walk.
[27:05] Speaker 2: And did the air feel different? Did did it feel
[27:08] Speaker 2: different like when you were out in It was almost
[27:12] Speaker 2: like a dream.
[27:13] Speaker 1: Sequence and I was watching myself versus like being there
[27:19] Speaker 1: for a second. And then I don't know what happened,
[27:23] Speaker 1: but something happened, and i'd been restless all night. I
[27:27] Speaker 1: couldn't really sleep. I was really worried. And this has
[27:30] Speaker 1: happened a lot of times. I feel like I've talked
[27:32] Speaker 1: about it here. This has happened a lot of times.
[27:33] Speaker 1: So I kind of felt like, you know, the boy
[27:35] Speaker 1: who cried wolf, but I'm sure everybody understands you, just
[27:39] Speaker 1: you really don't know. But then like something was different,
[27:42] Speaker 1: and I did ask my girl Cecy, let me tell
[27:44] Speaker 1: y'all how much I tell her. I told her everything.
[27:46] Speaker 1: She even gave me a statement to say today, but
[27:48] Speaker 1: I didn't think I was going to be able to
[27:50] Speaker 1: get it out right. So thanks girl, But uh so
[27:53] Speaker 1: I'm sending her the text messages and screenshots from the family.
[27:55] Speaker 1: I was like, girl, I don't know who said what.
[27:57] Speaker 1: These are the players in the game. These are my aunties,
[28:00] Speaker 1: my uncle. I gave her like everybody who might have
[28:02] Speaker 1: been in the group chat because they were coming to
[28:03] Speaker 1: me as like copy and paste and all this other stuff.
[28:05] Speaker 1: I was like, what you think this means? And keep
[28:07] Speaker 1: it real? How much time you take a guy like
[28:10] Speaker 1: for real? For real? I know you can't tell me
[28:11] Speaker 1: anything official. She was like, well, she said some really
[28:15] Speaker 1: nice things and similar things.
[28:16] Speaker 2: To what you just said.
[28:17] Speaker 1: Actually, but she was like yeah, probably a few days, max,
[28:20] Speaker 1: a few weeks. And I was like, oh my goodness,
[28:23] Speaker 1: that's just crazy. And it's crazy how you can talk
[28:25] Speaker 1: to somebody and they are there and the next thing
[28:28] Speaker 1: they're gone. That is the part.
[28:29] Speaker 2: Even though we and my grandma always says this, y'all
[28:32] Speaker 2: crying and we all want to go to heaven. You know,
[28:35] Speaker 2: you gotta die to get there. She's always said that.
[28:37] Speaker 2: She was saying, it's like, yeah, but when it happens,
[28:40] Speaker 2: you are just like, bro, where do you go? Like
[28:43] Speaker 2: I know we have the stuff that but at the
[28:45] Speaker 2: end of the day, like where are you? Can you
[28:47] Speaker 2: see us? Can you feel us? Are you here when
[28:50] Speaker 2: things happen? Is that you what do you get to
[28:52] Speaker 2: have memories? Or memories too hard for you? And it's
[28:54] Speaker 2: not supposed to be hard in heaven? Like do you
[28:56] Speaker 2: do you see to Luba count Mic, like what what
[28:59] Speaker 2: is like?
[29:00] Speaker 1: Where do you actually go?
[29:01] Speaker 2: Do you see us all? Do you get to see
[29:04] Speaker 2: how much you impacted people's life from that angle?
[29:07] Speaker 1: Or is that are you so?
[29:09] Speaker 2: Are you so like happy now and really blissful that
[29:13] Speaker 2: you really are?
[29:14] Speaker 1: Just like this ghetto down there, I'm not going back,
[29:17] Speaker 1: do what I told you to do, and maybe I'll
[29:20] Speaker 1: see you again. I don't know, I do wonder. You
[29:23] Speaker 1: don't have to literally tell me, though, you could just
[29:27] Speaker 1: tell chat GBT to tell me, because if I started
[29:29] Speaker 1: hearing voices and have envisions, I'm gonna be scared.
[29:34] Speaker 2: Like, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, death is death is crazy,
[29:40] Speaker 2: this is a way, this is tragic. But there's a
[29:43] Speaker 2: young lady that I went to Clark, Atlanta with that.
[29:45] Speaker 2: This was again, this was jarring right before on single
[29:49] Speaker 2: Demid she died. She got shot in California. This is
[29:52] Speaker 2: I saw that doctor Kamisha Clark. She was actually the
[29:55] Speaker 2: twenty one from the nine AKA line at Clark, I
[30:00] Speaker 2: was a twenty one from Sigma chapter. Anyways, she got murdered.
[30:05] Speaker 2: And when that when I saw it, when I saw
[30:07] Speaker 2: it happening, I was like when I saw the posts,
[30:11] Speaker 2: it just stops you and you're like, wow, life, really,
[30:13] Speaker 2: this is not forever. Yeah, some people get to make
[30:16] Speaker 2: it to eighty one. Some people my grandma's ninety. Some
[30:19] Speaker 2: people get to make it to she was thirty five,
[30:21] Speaker 2: thirty six. Yeah, it's like a ticking, It's like a
[30:25] Speaker 2: it's like there's no preparation for that one. There's no
[30:27] Speaker 2: preparation like you just and that's just like it. The
[30:30] Speaker 2: things that you started, the bills that were do whoever
[30:33] Speaker 2: you were crying. Even when I go back to my
[30:36] Speaker 2: grandmother and I was looking at her this weekend and
[30:38] Speaker 2: I was just like, wow, all the dramatics, all the
[30:40] Speaker 2: things you were worried about, everything that mattered, it doesn't
[30:43] Speaker 2: even matter anymore, like at all.
[30:46] Speaker 1: Yeah, it's over, it's done.
[30:49] Speaker 2: Life is very interesting, it's very interesting, and you don't know.
[30:55] Speaker 2: You just don't know when it's your time do the things.
[30:57] Speaker 2: You don't know if you get to eighty, because when
[30:59] Speaker 2: you do, look at the elders that get to live there,
[31:02] Speaker 2: that's a life that people hope to live. And some
[31:04] Speaker 2: people didn't. Like you lived this full life.
[31:06] Speaker 1: You got to meet grandchildren that were born in appropriate ages.
[31:10] Speaker 1: Unlike me, you get He got to meet great grandchildren.
[31:13] Speaker 1: He got to meet my baby Wentley. Oh you know,
[31:17] Speaker 1: he never got to see her, but he did get
[31:18] Speaker 1: to meet her. He got to know that like his
[31:22] Speaker 1: youngest child is getting married. He got to find out
[31:25] Speaker 1: one of his grandchildren is getting married. All these different things.
[31:29] Speaker 1: He was there for a lot of moments he got
[31:32] Speaker 1: to spend time, and that's really important.
[31:35] Speaker 3: Yeah.
[31:35] Speaker 2: When I was with my grandma this week and there
[31:37] Speaker 2: was a momentere I just stood back and was like,
[31:40] Speaker 2: when you're a kid, you don't realize how important the
[31:42] Speaker 2: moments are and how one day this is gonna just
[31:45] Speaker 2: really you're gonna Me and my sister were just at
[31:47] Speaker 2: my grandma's house, like we were talking about how old
[31:49] Speaker 2: people are just so their generation was just so different
[31:52] Speaker 2: from ours, and a lot of times we only highlight
[31:54] Speaker 2: the negative aspects of it. My grandma she never put
[31:57] Speaker 2: a dishwasher in the kitchen. What what?
[32:00] Speaker 1: But my grandparents didn't have one until they moved into
[32:04] Speaker 1: the new house. Didn't care.
[32:06] Speaker 2: I looked at my grandmother's house. She still got a
[32:08] Speaker 2: pink carpet nobody even had.
[32:11] Speaker 1: She didn't care.
[32:12] Speaker 2: She what she cared about was getting the family together.
[32:15] Speaker 2: She wasn't like, don't come to my house because it's
[32:17] Speaker 2: not together, it's not ready, I don't have the newest thing.
[32:20] Speaker 2: That didn't matter like it did she Our generation is
[32:24] Speaker 2: so different. We're like no, and not only can you
[32:26] Speaker 2: not come over, I'm not gonna even let you know
[32:27] Speaker 2: what's I mean? It's just this interesting thing that it's
[32:32] Speaker 2: like we don't talk about it enough. How important that
[32:35] Speaker 2: generation really was to like the glue to family. My Anyways,
[32:40] Speaker 2: back to what I was saying, I was standing back
[32:42] Speaker 2: and I was looking at she still has the same
[32:43] Speaker 2: table from when I was a child running in that house,
[32:46] Speaker 2: the same piano. Never got it to nothing, but it
[32:49] Speaker 2: still is home. Never got the bathroom's redone. That's not
[32:51] Speaker 2: what she was worried about. She was worried about family.
[32:54] Speaker 2: And I'm sitting there looking at my grandmother and we're
[32:58] Speaker 2: all sitting around the table. There's her, my mom, her daughter,
[33:04] Speaker 2: me and my sister, my mom's daughters, my niece, Disney's
[33:07] Speaker 2: four generations sitting in here. It was so beautiful, like
[33:13] Speaker 2: it was just like wow, Like you hope when you
[33:16] Speaker 2: get old that you have people around you that love you.
[33:19] Speaker 2: You know how many people don't have that. You lived
[33:21] Speaker 2: this life, you had the success, you got the money.
[33:23] Speaker 2: You now at your wits ends, and nobody wants to
[33:25] Speaker 2: take care of you. Nobody wants to take care of y'all.
[33:27] Speaker 2: Look at my grandma. I'm like everybody when she is
[33:29] Speaker 2: when she needs something, everybody's so, what do we need?
[33:31] Speaker 2: To do. M h, what do we need to do
[33:33] Speaker 2: to make sure she's comfortable?
[33:35] Speaker 1: And that that's such I saw a story recently. This
[33:39] Speaker 1: couple dropped the husband's parents off at a hotel and
[33:44] Speaker 1: said they just weren't taking care of them anymore. It
[33:46] Speaker 1: was two elderly people over eighty years old. They both
[33:49] Speaker 1: had serious health issues. He paid for like a night
[33:51] Speaker 1: or two at this hotel, and then the woman who
[33:55] Speaker 1: worked the front desk, she got concerned because she saw
[33:58] Speaker 1: like the guy walking away around the older man walking
[34:02] Speaker 1: around the lobby, and he seemed confused, and so they
[34:05] Speaker 1: were supposed to check out. They didn't, and they had
[34:08] Speaker 1: been brought there with like a sheriff for something. But
[34:10] Speaker 1: I'm like, how do you? I mean, we also don't
[34:13] Speaker 1: know what happened in those relationships, but it just makes
[34:15] Speaker 1: me wonder, how do you just drop them off there
[34:19] Speaker 1: and just leave them? I was thinking about that when
[34:22] Speaker 1: you were talking about mules on wheels, and there are
[34:25] Speaker 1: a lot of old people. Even my grandma was telling
[34:27] Speaker 1: me there was a guy who lived across the streets
[34:31] Speaker 1: that was her friend and she felt so bad he
[34:34] Speaker 1: passed and she didn't know it, and he was supposed
[34:37] Speaker 1: to come over and like mow her yard for her.
[34:39] Speaker 1: He said he would take care of it so she
[34:40] Speaker 1: could stop being out there and she could just relax.
[34:44] Speaker 1: And he didn't come. So she's mad and she's like
[34:46] Speaker 1: he can't even call, like whatever. And so some time
[34:49] Speaker 1: goes by, she's got other things, and then she's like,
[34:51] Speaker 1: wait a minute, now I'm worried. Goes across the street.
[34:54] Speaker 1: Eve been dead for days, days, sad. Yeah, and so
[35:00] Speaker 1: so you know, it just makes you think, So anybody,
[35:02] Speaker 1: old or not, but especially if they're old or sickly,
[35:05] Speaker 1: check on them.
[35:06] Speaker 2: Check on them. And also another angle of it is
[35:09] Speaker 2: like how are you treating people in the world, because,
[35:12] Speaker 2: like you said, you don't know the story. Some people
[35:14] Speaker 2: aren't taken care of and cared about because of what
[35:16] Speaker 2: you put in the world. Like you didn't really pour
[35:20] Speaker 2: that into your children, you didn't really pour that into
[35:23] Speaker 2: your friends. There's this white woman, her name is miss Anne.
[35:26] Speaker 2: We are forced to call her aunt Anne, but she
[35:29] Speaker 2: was no, she's my grandma's neighbor.
[35:31] Speaker 1: But this is like this this.
[35:32] Speaker 2: Speaks to.
[35:35] Speaker 3: You.
[35:36] Speaker 2: They're like, yeah, anyways, is this speaks volumes to like
[35:40] Speaker 2: who my grandmother was as a person. In her life
[35:42] Speaker 2: aunt Anne. She calls my grandma. Ever since I was
[35:46] Speaker 2: a kid, she called when she could come over. She
[35:48] Speaker 2: would come over. But she's older now too. She's just
[35:50] Speaker 2: still younger than my grandmother. She calls my grandmother every
[35:53] Speaker 2: morning like clockwork. If my grandma doesn't pick up the phone,
[35:57] Speaker 2: she calls the police. We had to my mom and them,
[36:00] Speaker 2: I'd to be like, man, not evident, but and don't care.
[36:02] Speaker 2: She's like, no, Mayor, she calls her mayor, Mayor. She'll
[36:06] Speaker 2: be on the inter call late.
[36:09] Speaker 1: That's got a neighbor. I want to be She like,
[36:12] Speaker 1: just no, I'm checking in.
[36:13] Speaker 2: She's checking in. She called everybody in the family. She
[36:15] Speaker 2: don't care if she's annoying anybody. She is like, no,
[36:17] Speaker 2: I'm gonna be there for Mary. There's this lady, her
[36:19] Speaker 2: name is Tijuana, and I didn't know this until recently.
[36:22] Speaker 2: She was a drug addict. A long time ago, my
[36:23] Speaker 2: grandmother used to work. She was ahead of something at
[36:26] Speaker 2: Holiday Inn and she was like one of the first
[36:28] Speaker 2: black women that had that position. And this lady named
[36:31] Speaker 2: Tajuana came and she needed a job. They wouldn't hire
[36:33] Speaker 2: her because she clearly looked like a crackhead. I didn't
[36:36] Speaker 2: mean to say it like cause she is different now.
[36:39] Speaker 2: But my grandmother gave her a chance. And even when
[36:40] Speaker 2: they tell me the story, I'd be like, oh, you
[36:42] Speaker 2: were really putting your knack out there. And she gave
[36:45] Speaker 2: her a chance. And in my grandmother's elder years, Tijuana comes,
[36:49] Speaker 2: she comes to that. I saw, I saw her yesterday.
[36:52] Speaker 1: Mm hmm.
[36:52] Speaker 2: She comes and she she cleans up from my grandmother.
[36:55] Speaker 2: She makes sure she's good. She's like your grandmother gave me.
[36:58] Speaker 2: She changed the trajectory of my life because she gave
[37:01] Speaker 2: me a chance. And that's the type of woman she
[37:04] Speaker 2: was and is. She didn't care what you looked like,
[37:07] Speaker 2: or what you had or what you could bring to
[37:08] Speaker 2: the table. She believed in you, and you didn't believe
[37:11] Speaker 2: in you. And it's just like you see it now.
[37:14] Speaker 2: You see like the people that she's affected and everybody
[37:16] Speaker 2: just be coming.
[37:16] Speaker 1: I'm like, why these people like that?
[37:18] Speaker 2: They love her? Mm hmm.
[37:20] Speaker 1: It's just man, it's important, so reach out and touch
[37:23] Speaker 1: somebody there's something positive, and think about the impacts that
[37:26] Speaker 1: you're leaving and how do you want to be remembered.
[37:29] Speaker 1: I can't stand when niggas be talking about their legacy
[37:31] Speaker 1: and all they want to have as a kid, and
[37:32] Speaker 1: it's like, but what is the legacy or what did
[37:35] Speaker 1: you do? How have you impacted the world? Go watch
[37:38] Speaker 1: your Beyonce documentary, get inspired, and then figure out how
[37:41] Speaker 1: you can answer that question for yourself. Get out there
[37:43] Speaker 1: and do something. Because having a baby ain't it?
[37:46] Speaker 2: It ain't it? And how they all running around here
[37:48] Speaker 2: look crazy and ashy if they can even run, and
[37:51] Speaker 2: if they can talk. You ever been around some kids
[37:53] Speaker 2: and they can't talk, You're like, why can't you talk?
[37:55] Speaker 2: And with them you can wrap? And you got silver teeth. Now,
[38:03] Speaker 2: I've always said that one day, when I get the funds,
[38:06] Speaker 2: I am going to make a horror film and it's
[38:08] Speaker 2: gonna be called The Silver Tooth Children.
[38:12] Speaker 1: And it's gonna are they gonna bite?
[38:14] Speaker 2: Oh? They're doing more? Them Silver Teeth kids is acting up,
[38:20] Speaker 2: They drinking alcohol, they robbing you, and then they turn
[38:24] Speaker 2: into gremlins at the end and eat everybody. It's gonna
[38:27] Speaker 2: be a little fantasy mix in there.
[38:31] Speaker 1: Supernatural.
[38:34] Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.
[38:35] Speaker 1: Okay, well that's enough of that.
[38:39] Speaker 3: I do.
[38:41] Speaker 1: I want to share this weird sex story. What is
[38:43] Speaker 1: this one about?
[38:44] Speaker 2: Is it weird to go into weird sex tup.
[38:47] Speaker 1: This lady kills somebody doing some freak shit and we
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[38:56] Speaker 1: a good fragrance. I love smelling good. But even out
[39:00] Speaker 1: side of my fragrances, I really like my natural feminine scent.
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[39:15] Speaker 1: getting tears when you're done with man, you could actually
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[39:34] Speaker 1: whatever you want. And there are people there who are
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[39:39] Speaker 1: and you can kind of see, you know, what the
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[40:20] Speaker 2: the episode's description right and we will move.
[40:23] Speaker 1: On to our topics for the week. Yes, what is
[40:26] Speaker 1: this situation? I was looking at the show notes. I'm
[40:29] Speaker 1: not familiar and I'm.
[40:30] Speaker 2: Shocked that you're not familiar because i feel like normally
[40:32] Speaker 2: you know what's going on in the in the lives
[40:35] Speaker 2: of the people.
[40:36] Speaker 1: Well, catch me up.
[40:37] Speaker 2: I'm surprised your ma man catch you up on this.
[40:39] Speaker 2: But so when I saw this, I immediately sent it
[40:42] Speaker 2: to several women that I know that are currently going
[40:45] Speaker 2: through this. So Marlon Wayans, he made a post he said.
[40:51] Speaker 2: He posted a picture of him and his mother and
[40:54] Speaker 2: him this is from Mother's Day. Maybe from Mother's Day.
[40:57] Speaker 2: Oh yeah, he said, I never ever got married because
[41:01] Speaker 2: I never wanted my mother to be jealous of a woman.
[41:04] Speaker 2: I never wanted my mother to feel second to any woman.
[41:10] Speaker 2: And that's why he didn't get married. The comments, the comments,
[41:21] Speaker 2: and I was actually happy to get in here and
[41:22] Speaker 2: not see no men in here defending this because first
[41:25] Speaker 2: of all, first of all, I will give him as
[41:26] Speaker 2: kudos because I appreciate him for knowing that because there
[41:29] Speaker 2: are so many yourself, know yourself and know how you
[41:32] Speaker 2: He knew he was not gonna really cherish a woman
[41:34] Speaker 2: because his mom she's gonna go. She's over everybody, and
[41:37] Speaker 2: there are so many people that I literally know. I
[41:39] Speaker 2: don't know if you do. Where it's like their mother
[41:41] Speaker 2: in law causes an issue because the son doesn't either.
[41:46] Speaker 2: I don't know a better word other than check her.
[41:49] Speaker 2: And it's like the mother in law makes all of this,
[41:52] Speaker 2: the decisions for your household. The mother in law is
[41:56] Speaker 2: telling you how to raise your children, not giving you advice.
[41:59] Speaker 2: But I'm talking about the sun is actually like.
[42:01] Speaker 1: What was an iron fist? Like she's fucking Queen Elizabeth and.
[42:05] Speaker 2: She is too like and it's like, this is a
[42:08] Speaker 2: thing that really happens.
[42:10] Speaker 1: So then it made me what were the people saying that?
[42:12] Speaker 2: People were mad, But it was a lot of not mad.
[42:15] Speaker 2: They were just like, this is weird. This is very weird.
[42:17] Speaker 2: Like there is a U, there's a there's a hierarchy
[42:23] Speaker 2: when it comes to relationships, and that's just naturally how
[42:26] Speaker 2: it goes, especially if you're a married person or if
[42:28] Speaker 2: you have kids with someone, if you start to create
[42:31] Speaker 2: a family with you and said, man, you guys have
[42:35] Speaker 2: a baby, that's your family. You have your own branch.
[42:40] Speaker 2: Now you have your own branch. And while I still
[42:42] Speaker 2: think that when you're dealing with people's families, you have
[42:45] Speaker 2: to delicately approach the situation because that's somebody's mama. I'll
[42:48] Speaker 2: personally that's how I move. I would even if your
[42:50] Speaker 2: mom did something disrespectful, she did something annoying, I would
[42:53] Speaker 2: never approach somebody's family in a in a way that
[42:56] Speaker 2: maybe I would approach somebody else, Like, it's that's your mama,
[42:59] Speaker 2: that's the person who raised you. You love her. So
[43:01] Speaker 2: there is a way that it has to be approached
[43:05] Speaker 2: even if she's out of line. I might be the
[43:07] Speaker 2: only person that feels that way, but that's just how
[43:08] Speaker 2: that's how I was raised and so but there's still
[43:11] Speaker 2: a protocol when you create your own household, and some
[43:15] Speaker 2: people don't know those boundaries. And specifically, what I have
[43:19] Speaker 2: seen in life is there are men that don't set
[43:21] Speaker 2: the boundaries with their with their moms. And it's really
[43:25] Speaker 2: it is just a very touchy situation. It's and it's
[43:30] Speaker 2: interesting to see Marlon Wayanams be so open about it
[43:32] Speaker 2: and talk about it, because I don't, like I said,
[43:35] Speaker 2: I don't think people talk about it enough. This is
[43:37] Speaker 2: something I told you. I had joined this program for
[43:39] Speaker 2: a minute that Liz told me about and they talked
[43:41] Speaker 2: about this, and I never brought it up because I
[43:42] Speaker 2: was like, nobody talks about this stuff. But I've heard
[43:44] Speaker 2: people go through this. I've seen people very close to
[43:46] Speaker 2: me going through it. Currently, somebody wanted to take the
[43:49] Speaker 2: baby and have Mother's Day with his mama instead of
[43:52] Speaker 2: the baby's hold. Don't get missed.
[43:55] Speaker 1: Wait a minute, it's a couple.
[43:56] Speaker 2: Imagine you're married and your husband is like, well, let's
[44:01] Speaker 2: do something for my mom for Mother's day with the
[44:04] Speaker 2: kids and has nothing planned for you, the mother of
[44:06] Speaker 2: the children. That ain't going down. It's going down in
[44:12] Speaker 2: certain households, and some people speak of you know what else,
[44:14] Speaker 2: what's going down?
[44:15] Speaker 1: We're gonna be down at the courthouse because I'm not
[44:17] Speaker 1: doing this and this ain't Nobody said that this is
[44:20] Speaker 1: how it goes. Nobody that's not how.
[44:24] Speaker 2: It's supposed to go. So so there's this thing. It's
[44:27] Speaker 2: called emotional incest. There's a word for it. It's called
[44:31] Speaker 2: emotional incest. It is when mothers act like their son
[44:37] Speaker 2: is their husband. Now, obviously you're not having sex with them,
[44:40] Speaker 2: but you are relying on your not that there aren't
[44:43] Speaker 2: certain things that your children are still going to do
[44:45] Speaker 2: for you, like take care of you, But there is
[44:46] Speaker 2: a boundary that doesn't get set in some of those relationships,
[44:50] Speaker 2: and it causes a problem for the emotional hierarchy. When
[44:53] Speaker 2: he takes a wife is not like that.
[44:55] Speaker 1: That's like when it's specifically the mother and this son.
[44:58] Speaker 1: That's the Oedipus complex, right, I think? So, yeah, yeah, Okay.
[45:02] Speaker 1: I paid attention to some of them literature classes, and
[45:05] Speaker 1: I've heard somebody use a phrase like a surrogate partner.
[45:08] Speaker 1: And so some of these mothers are treating their sons
[45:12] Speaker 1: as a surrogate husband, and yeah, you gotta be careful
[45:16] Speaker 1: with that, And that's definitely something that you should ask somebody,
[45:21] Speaker 1: like where they stand with I've asked that. I personally
[45:25] Speaker 1: haven't dealt with someone who has that issue, at least
[45:29] Speaker 1: not as far as we've gotten. I don't know a
[45:33] Speaker 1: lot of people like that, but I do know some
[45:36] Speaker 1: women now that I'm thinking about this, this.
[45:38] Speaker 2: Is my daddy's side.
[45:40] Speaker 1: That's why none of them Mary probably they I think
[45:43] Speaker 1: I just really disagree with a lot of the ways
[45:45] Speaker 1: that they approach things. I can tell that his mother
[45:47] Speaker 1: would come first. He's been because their relationship, even the
[45:57] Speaker 1: relationship with him and his sisters, like he's like this
[46:01] Speaker 1: golden child and they do a lot for him all
[46:04] Speaker 1: the time, Like outside of my dad being sick and
[46:06] Speaker 1: everything else, it's just like he is spoiled, rotten in
[46:09] Speaker 1: so many ways. And I think that if anything ever
[46:13] Speaker 1: came to it, it's like his mom is always gonna
[46:15] Speaker 1: take a side right or wrong, right, and he's always
[46:18] Speaker 1: That is a sign to me sometimes, like your mama
[46:21] Speaker 1: doesn't have to call you out in front of another person,
[46:24] Speaker 1: but she could check you later. I don't think there's
[46:26] Speaker 1: ever any checking that have I don't know a better
[46:28] Speaker 1: phrase either. I don't think that that ever happens. And
[46:30] Speaker 1: I think that had he ever gotten married or gotten
[46:33] Speaker 1: that far with anyone, I think it could be a
[46:36] Speaker 1: problem if she didn't approve. Now, if she approves, it's
[46:39] Speaker 1: all good. And even I was talking to my cousin,
[46:43] Speaker 1: one of my dad's sister son, and he was telling
[46:47] Speaker 1: me about some things that had been happening, and there
[46:50] Speaker 1: was like some tension between him and his mother because
[46:53] Speaker 1: his mother felt like her son didn't consider her feelings
[47:00] Speaker 1: in a choice that he made in his life that
[47:06] Speaker 1: should have been between him and the woman he was with,
[47:09] Speaker 1: not her, and that has caused tension. And when we
[47:13] Speaker 1: were talking about it, it had been a while since
[47:15] Speaker 1: I caught up with him, and he was like, you're
[47:18] Speaker 1: the only person. He was like, I'm so glad you
[47:20] Speaker 1: called me today. You're literally the only person in the
[47:22] Speaker 1: family that like gets it. And I was like, oh
[47:26] Speaker 1: my god, I gotta have a psychevol soon because I
[47:28] Speaker 1: got to see which way I'm going. Is it maternal
[47:30] Speaker 1: or paternal because I'm concerned because, like, what, how do
[47:32] Speaker 1: y'all think that that's okay? This is an adult and
[47:35] Speaker 1: like when your children grow up, you're supposed to do everything.
[47:38] Speaker 1: At least it's how I see it. When you are
[47:40] Speaker 1: raising a child, everybody who has a hand in raising
[47:43] Speaker 1: that child, you do everything that you can to raise
[47:46] Speaker 1: them to be an adult who makes good decisions. Right,
[47:49] Speaker 1: and when they become that adult and they're making these decisions,
[47:51] Speaker 1: you respect them, or even if you don't, you move on.
[47:54] Speaker 1: But you cannot expect as a mother. I don't think
[47:56] Speaker 1: that you come before his wife and the children him
[48:00] Speaker 1: and his wife make or whoever he make them with,
[48:02] Speaker 1: or get them wherever he gets them from. These kids
[48:05] Speaker 1: are his kids. That's his responsibility.
[48:07] Speaker 2: Why would you.
[48:08] Speaker 1: Even want that?
[48:09] Speaker 2: Why would you want that?
[48:10] Speaker 1: That's weird, it's very it's given flowers in the attic.
[48:14] Speaker 1: It does parents instead of siblings.
[48:16] Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean that is just out. You're like you said,
[48:18] Speaker 2: you're not you. You equipped your children with decision making
[48:23] Speaker 2: sells and you give them the chance to show you
[48:27] Speaker 2: that and when they take a partner, absolutely disrespectful. But
[48:35] Speaker 2: he has children, he has children, and that's what I
[48:37] Speaker 2: was gonna say, it's interesting because when you do, I
[48:39] Speaker 2: think sometimes as a parent when you I'm not a parent,
[48:42] Speaker 2: but like I do have a dog.
[48:44] Speaker 1: They was mad at us dog mom's or mother's talk
[48:48] Speaker 1: about this is not for you. I ain't trying to
[48:50] Speaker 1: get in the way of no real mama. I know
[48:52] Speaker 1: it's all just I don't need to laugh sometimes. God damn,
[48:55] Speaker 1: but these bills is high.
[48:56] Speaker 2: These bills is high. And I'm taking care of a
[48:58] Speaker 2: senior city send your key.
[49:01] Speaker 1: I'm taking care of an emotional support animal. I'm like, baby, girl,
[49:05] Speaker 1: you're supposed to be taking care of me. Clock in.
[49:07] Speaker 1: She was sleep snoring. She did check on me when
[49:10] Speaker 1: I really was followed out on the floor and wallslider,
[49:12] Speaker 1: but like this morning, she was not clocked in, And
[49:15] Speaker 1: I'm like, bitch, you need to earn your key the fuck.
[49:18] Speaker 2: When you are developing this little human who is your
[49:22] Speaker 2: child to be a citizen of this world, you supposed
[49:29] Speaker 2: to you teach him about roles in life. Essentially, you
[49:33] Speaker 2: do like there is a role in every part of life.
[49:37] Speaker 2: Now you tweak and do what you please. But when
[49:40] Speaker 2: you go to work, when you go to school, you're
[49:43] Speaker 2: a student. You don't get to go and be like,
[49:45] Speaker 2: and I'm the professor. You're not, You're the student one. Yeah,
[49:48] Speaker 2: when you take when you get into the workforce, there
[49:50] Speaker 2: are roles. You don't get to be the cashier and
[49:53] Speaker 2: go to the CEO and tell him what he's gonna
[49:56] Speaker 2: do and make the decisions for this company. Now, what
[49:58] Speaker 2: you can do is there might be a suggestion box.
[50:01] Speaker 2: There's room for suggestions.
[50:04] Speaker 1: And you can email.
[50:05] Speaker 2: Yeah, you can send an email. Can your voice can
[50:07] Speaker 2: be heard and it might be acknowledged, but it also
[50:10] Speaker 2: might not be And in a household, those boundaries. Oh,
[50:15] Speaker 2: this is what makes me so nervous about creating these things.
[50:18] Speaker 2: I tell my sister and my brother this, and my
[50:20] Speaker 2: mom and my dad this all the time. I wish
[50:22] Speaker 2: I would have been the first one to start the families,
[50:24] Speaker 2: because now that I've seen so much, now I'm like,
[50:28] Speaker 2: what is going on up in this bitch?
[50:31] Speaker 1: I am telling you When people be like, oh, yeah,
[50:34] Speaker 1: but no, I see what the fuck going on around here?
[50:36] Speaker 1: And it's like that song what the helly?
[50:38] Speaker 2: What helly?
[50:39] Speaker 1: Like, what is going on right? I don't? I am scared.
[50:43] Speaker 2: There's just so many things that just go unaddressed and
[50:46] Speaker 2: it's like can we can we address them and still
[50:49] Speaker 2: have a relationship, Like can we address them and still
[50:52] Speaker 2: be parents? I understand what's going on. I'm in a
[50:54] Speaker 2: book club. It's called Mothers and Daughters of the Bible,
[50:59] Speaker 2: and my mom are in it. It was like plent
[51:01] Speaker 2: to get her to join it, but she joined it.
[51:03] Speaker 2: And it's Moms and Daughters and we read this book
[51:05] Speaker 2: were there's this book we're reading. It's called Mothers and
[51:07] Speaker 2: Daughters of the Bible and you each each month we
[51:11] Speaker 2: tackle a different mother daughter duo. Now I am yeah,
[51:14] Speaker 2: I know I was. I got saved. I am still
[51:16] Speaker 2: very much like spicy, like it's no, I'm going to
[51:19] Speaker 2: ask a question if I have a question, if something
[51:20] Speaker 2: don't make sense, I don't care who said it. I'm
[51:23] Speaker 2: asking the question. Jesus and I got questions. And so
[51:26] Speaker 2: we had got to a part in with two of
[51:29] Speaker 2: the characters we were focusing on was the mother in
[51:37] Speaker 2: law and the daughters. Her daughters in laws followed her right, Okay, sorry, okay,
[51:43] Speaker 2: I know that I'm right.
[51:43] Speaker 1: I was sleep at church a lot of times and
[51:45] Speaker 1: eating church.
[51:46] Speaker 2: Can I'm it's okay, It's okay, I got it. I'm
[51:48] Speaker 2: getting it out Naomi or Naomi and her daughter. And
[51:52] Speaker 2: we were focusing on the on this the daughter in
[51:55] Speaker 2: laws in Naomi, Naomi and Ruth to be exact, Okay,
[51:57] Speaker 2: Ruth left her whole family to go follow Naomi after
[52:01] Speaker 2: her husband because.
[52:01] Speaker 1: Both of her sons died.
[52:03] Speaker 2: And so we're in here and we discuss what's going on.
[52:06] Speaker 2: I'm not discussing anything with fluff. We need to talk
[52:08] Speaker 2: about some truth. So everybody was like, yeat, everybody has
[52:11] Speaker 2: spiritual mothers and and I was like, I've looked at
[52:14] Speaker 2: this a totally different way. And I was scared to
[52:18] Speaker 2: say my opinion because this is the holy crowd. And
[52:20] Speaker 2: so I was like, Everyone's like, well, how did you
[52:22] Speaker 2: look at them? And I was like, well, I looked
[52:23] Speaker 2: at them, like how much of a great person Naomi
[52:26] Speaker 2: must have been for her daughter in laws to want
[52:28] Speaker 2: to leave their living family to come follow her in life.
[52:32] Speaker 2: And when I look at a lot of situations, whether
[52:34] Speaker 2: it's your son has a baby mama, he has a girlfriend,
[52:36] Speaker 2: or he has a wife, the in law situation be
[52:39] Speaker 2: real dramatic. It be real dramatic. And Naomi must have
[52:43] Speaker 2: had a lot of patience and she must have been
[52:45] Speaker 2: very understanding for her the women who weren't her blood
[52:48] Speaker 2: related daughters to want to come and live life with her.
[52:50] Speaker 2: And so it makes me look at mother in laws
[52:52] Speaker 2: and be like, what is y'all doing to curate good
[52:55] Speaker 2: environments for your new family that has now come into
[52:58] Speaker 2: your life? And everybody was like and then the daughters
[52:59] Speaker 2: will with their mom's like, well you do be treating
[53:02] Speaker 2: you know, Brandon's girlfriend back, And then well, I don't
[53:04] Speaker 2: got nothing do me. Nobody does, because what are you
[53:07] Speaker 2: curating for people? Somebody is coming into your family and
[53:10] Speaker 2: they're new. Your rules do not stay here anymore, not
[53:13] Speaker 2: all of them. They're welcome, but you don't get to
[53:15] Speaker 2: just come through and boguard sheit excuse me, sorry, that
[53:19] Speaker 2: really makes me mad, just like in anything like bro
[53:22] Speaker 2: be understanding. If somebody's a new mommy, you try to
[53:24] Speaker 2: tell her how she's not mommy right? Whats happened to
[53:27] Speaker 2: you one day in your life?
[53:28] Speaker 1: That is ripe. I hear from pretty much every mother
[53:32] Speaker 1: and it has got to be frustrating.
[53:34] Speaker 2: I can I know.
[53:35] Speaker 1: I get frustrated when they tell me what to do
[53:37] Speaker 1: with my damn spice cabinet, not what they tell you
[53:40] Speaker 1: to do well. First of all, my mama's bland food
[53:43] Speaker 1: loving ass is always something about I got too many spices,
[53:46] Speaker 1: but you don't worry about all the flavors I got.
[53:49] Speaker 1: It's thirty one flavors of this booty delicious bubble gup
[53:52] Speaker 1: in my cablicious bubble gup, raspberry, grape cherry, Come and
[53:57] Speaker 1: get this honey fuck yump mey yump baby ordinary change.
[54:02] Speaker 1: But anyway, anyway, I have lots of spices. They are overflowing.
[54:05] Speaker 1: But I'm like different flavors. I enjoyed. That is my thing.
[54:09] Speaker 1: I don't come to your house until you got too
[54:11] Speaker 1: many perfumes and body splashes mm emphasis on splashes. I
[54:17] Speaker 1: don't tell you it's too many pillows on every piece
[54:20] Speaker 1: of furniture. We got a room to sit our big
[54:22] Speaker 1: asses down. I don't do that, so she will say that.
[54:25] Speaker 1: I was on FaceTime with my grandma one day and
[54:28] Speaker 1: I was cooking, and she was like, what, you got
[54:32] Speaker 1: your stuff over there? And I was like, hold it,
[54:34] Speaker 1: hold it, hold it, hold it. First of all, I
[54:37] Speaker 1: don't have my spices over there. I have my spices
[54:39] Speaker 1: where you think I should have my spices. I moved
[54:41] Speaker 1: these spices over here because I was working over here,
[54:44] Speaker 1: and I have my phone on a tripod because I
[54:46] Speaker 1: don't want to touch my phone because I'm in the
[54:47] Speaker 1: kitchen and I'm cooking. I have everything set up. You
[54:50] Speaker 1: don't worry about it. And you're like, you worried about this.
[54:54] Speaker 1: I'm worried about the roll. This is my kitchen. You
[54:57] Speaker 1: got something on the rent and then that'll shut it
[55:02] Speaker 1: down right there?
[55:03] Speaker 2: What you got it shut it down? And with the women,
[55:05] Speaker 2: I know that's still my sister and my sister, she
[55:09] Speaker 2: would kind of let me be, but like I think,
[55:11] Speaker 2: I don't know if it's a woman thing, but maybe
[55:13] Speaker 2: it is. My mom will do this thing like her
[55:15] Speaker 2: and my sister do this and it's not in me.
[55:17] Speaker 2: They wake up every morning and they start cleaning like slaves.
[55:20] Speaker 1: It is absolutely Juma does that shit too early in
[55:23] Speaker 1: the morning. They just shut everybody's sweeping, They're closing it,
[55:29] Speaker 1: clanking pots. Why does it smell like bleach at five am?
[55:33] Speaker 1: And so my mom when she comes to my space,
[55:35] Speaker 1: she's like, and this is I'm not doing it. I'm
[55:39] Speaker 1: not waking up cleaning like a slave.
[55:43] Speaker 2: I'm not. I'm tired and I'm okay with the cover
[55:47] Speaker 2: on the couch.
[55:48] Speaker 1: I'm okay with all of this is my house. If
[55:50] Speaker 1: you don't like it, get just stepping and it's okay.
[55:53] Speaker 2: If it looks like that, they get up and they clean.
[55:56] Speaker 2: My sister laughs, She's like, okay, I'm fine. I mean,
[55:58] Speaker 2: vacuum me if it doesn't. If Florida doesn't have vacuum
[56:01] Speaker 2: marks in it, they don't think the house is clean.
[56:03] Speaker 2: What happened to y'all? And I'll be damned that's my
[56:07] Speaker 2: mom in monstage. But if if a man's mother came
[56:10] Speaker 2: into my life and was like, why don't you have vacuum? Man,
[56:13] Speaker 2: you got to get pushed in your chin, And I'm like,
[56:15] Speaker 2: don't come in here with life stresses already and tell
[56:20] Speaker 2: me how to clean.
[56:21] Speaker 1: Because like that, what we can do is we can
[56:24] Speaker 1: take it to hell and we can pay play tip
[56:26] Speaker 1: for tad. I've been listening to this man run down
[56:29] Speaker 1: on all the shit that you ever did that was
[56:30] Speaker 1: fucked up. Do you want to hear my opinion about
[56:33] Speaker 1: your shortcomings? Because we can go there and then it's
[56:36] Speaker 1: gonna be World War three in this bitch, and ain't
[56:38] Speaker 1: nobody happy?
[56:39] Speaker 2: And now we're getting divorced and the baby is fatherless.
[56:42] Speaker 1: Well it's probably gonna be motherless. You and your mama
[56:47] Speaker 1: can raise the baby. Since y'all want to know every
[56:49] Speaker 1: fucking thing. Shit, you got your degree, you got your degree?
[56:53] Speaker 2: No, yeah, but it really made me think, like, Okay,
[56:58] Speaker 2: if I do get blessed with a please, I can't
[57:03] Speaker 2: hear me, you know, even desires? Okay, I do wonder
[57:10] Speaker 2: like should they should there be a pre conversation? Absolutely no,
[57:18] Speaker 2: me and man we need to have a conversation.
[57:22] Speaker 1: But before she jumps in.
[57:24] Speaker 2: We have a conversation. But then I also do want
[57:26] Speaker 2: the mother to know I am not your enemy. I
[57:30] Speaker 2: am supposed to be. You take on a daughter.
[57:32] Speaker 1: Let's be like Naomi and.
[57:35] Speaker 2: When this can happen if you have patience and understanding
[57:38] Speaker 2: and I do too, there is room for both of us. Friends.
[57:44] Speaker 1: Really, I ain't want your little friends. But I think,
[57:47] Speaker 1: okay that part, I get what you're saying. I think
[57:49] Speaker 1: it would depend on what that woman's personality is. Do
[57:55] Speaker 1: me and him talk. Do we think that she would
[57:57] Speaker 1: be reception to this? Is it better if we all
[58:01] Speaker 1: talk or will she feel ambush? Because I care about
[58:04] Speaker 1: the results of the conversation. Is it better for you
[58:07] Speaker 1: to talk to her? Is there somebody? Do you have
[58:10] Speaker 1: a sister? How your sister feel about I mean, what's
[58:12] Speaker 1: going on?
[58:14] Speaker 2: You handle that before I step in? Yeah, that's your family,
[58:17] Speaker 2: just like if it's my family, I'm gonna handle everything
[58:20] Speaker 2: first and then we trickle it down just so again
[58:22] Speaker 2: there's that respect there, because it's just like when when
[58:25] Speaker 2: Marlon Wayne's posted, I was like, how weird? How much
[58:28] Speaker 2: more weirder would this be if a daughter was like
[58:31] Speaker 2: I never got married because I didn't want my dad
[58:33] Speaker 2: to feel beneath any man. That's weird.
[58:36] Speaker 1: But I think they doing this, That's what I would think, Like, girl,
[58:42] Speaker 1: why you're so I love your daddy? Something ain't right here?
[58:44] Speaker 2: And his mom is married, and I just wonder does
[58:46] Speaker 2: she look at that like sun take that down?
[58:48] Speaker 1: Is his mom married to his dad or to someone else?
[58:52] Speaker 1: I don't where his daddy at. I wonder because I
[58:53] Speaker 1: wonder what his dad thinks about it, and what his
[58:55] Speaker 1: baby mama or mama's thinking about it, and what y'all
[58:58] Speaker 1: he got any eleven siblings? What they think? What do
[59:00] Speaker 1: they think? And what are your kids like?
[59:02] Speaker 2: You're not producing care you can go out here and
[59:04] Speaker 2: perform well as far as being partners, partners in anything,
[59:07] Speaker 2: if that matter. Like, I just I really thought he's.
[59:11] Speaker 1: Where is even Shawn At? I ain't seen Shawn At
[59:13] Speaker 1: none of the Waynes stuff. They haven't been getting honored
[59:15] Speaker 1: and everything. Where is he at? I don't know the
[59:17] Speaker 1: one that did the show him? And why is he
[59:20] Speaker 1: all right?
[59:21] Speaker 2: Has anybody do we need to do a welfare check?
[59:23] Speaker 2: Has anybody checked on Sean Wayne's That's a good question.
[59:28] Speaker 1: I haven't seen him. Hmm. I is suspicious.
[59:33] Speaker 2: I got questions, And I just know that if mothers,
[59:36] Speaker 2: if you're out here acting like that with with your sons,
[59:39] Speaker 2: you are doing them a disservice. You don't want your sign.
[59:41] Speaker 1: To find love. So I saw you put something on
[59:44] Speaker 1: the notes about and you mentioned it something about you
[59:47] Speaker 1: feel like there's a hierarchy in relationships, and I think
[59:50] Speaker 1: you included like outside of the mother and the child,
[59:53] Speaker 1: like siblings and friends. What do you think the hierarchy
[59:58] Speaker 1: should be or like for.
[59:59] Speaker 2: You when marriage comes into play. Yes, I think the
[1:00:03] Speaker 2: hierarchy is as hard as this might even be to do.
[1:00:08] Speaker 2: And I'm not saying that you don't take advice or
[1:00:11] Speaker 2: ask other people for their opinions, But.
[1:00:15] Speaker 1: Who all is involved in this hierarchy? Tell me that
[1:00:18] Speaker 1: first in your house?
[1:00:18] Speaker 2: Okay, if we're just talking about the household, no, no, no,
[1:00:20] Speaker 2: I'm saying.
[1:00:21] Speaker 1: And when you're about to say like, okay, your mother
[1:00:25] Speaker 1: or y'all's parents, your siblings, your close friends, your partner,
[1:00:29] Speaker 1: your kids, like, who are you including in the hierarchy?
[1:00:34] Speaker 2: Well, for real, for me and my husband, it's nobody else.
[1:00:38] Speaker 2: There is nobody else as far as like decision making,
[1:00:41] Speaker 2: and that's what I'm talking about. So it's like not
[1:00:43] Speaker 2: to say that you won't ask for advice. Let's say
[1:00:45] Speaker 2: you're let's say you're buying a home.
[1:00:47] Speaker 1: So then it's not a hierarchy. It's like it's me
[1:00:49] Speaker 1: and my man and that's it.
[1:00:51] Speaker 2: But I guess I don't really know what to call it.
[1:00:54] Speaker 2: It still would be a hierarchy because you might be like,
[1:00:56] Speaker 2: let's get some advice from people that have been through this.
[1:00:59] Speaker 2: But what I'm saying is your mom doesn't come in
[1:01:01] Speaker 2: and be like, this is the house I think you
[1:01:02] Speaker 2: should get, and then you're like, my mom said we
[1:01:03] Speaker 2: should get this house with that's what we're getting. Absolutely not.
[1:01:06] Speaker 2: My mom said this is how we should raise a kid,
[1:01:08] Speaker 2: So this is what we're doing. No, that's not how
[1:01:11] Speaker 2: this is going to go. Like as far as the
[1:01:13] Speaker 2: decision make, we can get advice all day week because
[1:01:15] Speaker 2: we're human. You're gonna call my friend and be like, hey.
[1:01:19] Speaker 1: Let's say it's like this versus her coming in and
[1:01:22] Speaker 1: trying to make a decision so that we can stay
[1:01:24] Speaker 1: on track with the hierarchy. If you and your husband
[1:01:27] Speaker 1: cannot agree for whatever.
[1:01:29] Speaker 2: Who's the first person I'm asking?
[1:01:30] Speaker 1: Who is? Who's if you ask your sister, your brother,
[1:01:35] Speaker 1: your best friend, and your mother or y'all's parents, whose
[1:01:39] Speaker 1: opinion matters the most.
[1:01:41] Speaker 2: It depends on the topic. If it's health, my dad
[1:01:44] Speaker 2: and correctly after him, my brother, if somebody's sick or
[1:01:46] Speaker 2: there's some sort of illness is going on, the first
[1:01:49] Speaker 2: one that I'm running with, Like it's like my dad
[1:01:51] Speaker 2: said this, and it's it's Bible. I'm gonna speak like
[1:01:54] Speaker 2: that about my dad and anything health related. Okay, if
[1:01:57] Speaker 2: it's something life, it's gonna be between my sister and
[1:02:01] Speaker 2: my mom.
[1:02:02] Speaker 1: Life like what like relationship like no, like moving through life,
[1:02:08] Speaker 1: decision like raising children?
[1:02:11] Speaker 2: What they what's good for them behavioral things. If it's
[1:02:15] Speaker 2: not we're not talking to a doctor, if we're just
[1:02:17] Speaker 2: like what have you been through this? Or like I'm
[1:02:20] Speaker 2: gonna naturally go to my mom because I trust her opinion,
[1:02:22] Speaker 2: and she actually is like, in my eyes, she has
[1:02:25] Speaker 2: represented what a outstanding mother has been. It's not like,
[1:02:31] Speaker 2: you know, some people be like, oh never mind. I
[1:02:34] Speaker 2: feel like people's feelings will get hair. But there's you know,
[1:02:36] Speaker 2: there's just some situations where it's like the people you
[1:02:38] Speaker 2: gonna love your parents regardless, but then there's the love
[1:02:40] Speaker 2: your parents regardless. But maybe they were.
[1:02:44] Speaker 1: Not a great parent.
[1:02:45] Speaker 2: Maybe they weren't they are, but you still gonna love them.
[1:02:49] Speaker 2: But they left you and you try and find my
[1:02:51] Speaker 2: ancestry dot com and you find them and now you're
[1:02:53] Speaker 2: like they're the greatest parent of all and it's like
[1:02:55] Speaker 2: or you.
[1:02:55] Speaker 1: Like I never should have paid for that damn subscription.
[1:02:57] Speaker 2: I want to refund right, or they tell you they
[1:03:00] Speaker 2: wish they never had you. There were moments like that,
[1:03:01] Speaker 2: Like I never had moments like that with my mom
[1:03:03] Speaker 2: where she was like, I'm not gonna stop drinking when
[1:03:05] Speaker 2: I'm pregnant. There are people that are smoking and drinking.
[1:03:07] Speaker 2: I saw this lady at the zoo.
[1:03:09] Speaker 1: She was pregnant, smoking like a smoking it was a vape.
[1:03:13] Speaker 2: Well, I don't know if it was weeding it or cigarettes.
[1:03:15] Speaker 2: But you don't need to be doing that. And I
[1:03:17] Speaker 2: don't care if you get offended. If you listening to
[1:03:18] Speaker 2: this show and smoking pregnant, you need to stop. Give
[1:03:21] Speaker 2: that baby a fighting chance. Anyways, So if there was
[1:03:24] Speaker 2: anything like life related, I would go to my mom. However,
[1:03:27] Speaker 2: I would not let my mom disrespect the man of
[1:03:30] Speaker 2: my household. H I just I wouldn't do that.
[1:03:34] Speaker 1: He needs to tell you, yeah, or I'm like no,
[1:03:37] Speaker 1: I'm saying when it comes to like she wants to
[1:03:39] Speaker 1: tell you something, don't come and tell my husband this
[1:03:42] Speaker 1: is what it is.
[1:03:42] Speaker 2: You talk to me and then we'll figure this out.
[1:03:46] Speaker 1: Me and my husband will figure Me and my husband
[1:03:47] Speaker 1: will figure this out.
[1:03:48] Speaker 2: Thank you for your services, Yeah, thank you for your services,
[1:03:51] Speaker 2: and the same for him. Don't be going off on
[1:03:53] Speaker 2: my mama now. If it's something that's just entirely disrespectful,
[1:03:56] Speaker 2: that's when they but it needs to be handled delicately.
[1:03:58] Speaker 2: This is your mother. I'm not going to do that
[1:03:59] Speaker 2: to you. I had a situation like that with an
[1:04:02] Speaker 2: ex and his mom did something it was very rude
[1:04:06] Speaker 2: to me and in your face, in my face, okay,
[1:04:10] Speaker 2: and it was very rude. But I think women, when
[1:04:13] Speaker 2: you are faced with something like that, you have the
[1:04:16] Speaker 2: opportunity to sit back and observe, because I think those
[1:04:18] Speaker 2: are signs that you can see if someone is going
[1:04:20] Speaker 2: to always pick their mother over you. And and and
[1:04:22] Speaker 2: it's true, he didn't. He checked it immediately, and I
[1:04:26] Speaker 2: was it was I was like, and he didn't do
[1:04:29] Speaker 2: it disrespectfully. He was like, do not talk to her
[1:04:31] Speaker 2: like that ever again.
[1:04:32] Speaker 1: Yeah, like to let something like that slide is wild. Yeah,
[1:04:40] Speaker 1: I'd be having to give warnings about my family. My
[1:04:41] Speaker 1: mama would naught like that.
[1:04:43] Speaker 2: My mom.
[1:04:44] Speaker 1: I actually think my family would be too nice. And
[1:04:46] Speaker 1: I'd be like, don't think that means something? Checking with
[1:04:49] Speaker 1: me by how I feel. Yeah, my dad is.
[1:04:52] Speaker 2: He's too nice.
[1:04:53] Speaker 1: Yeah, other people, you know, I'd be like, okay, look,
[1:04:55] Speaker 1: I'm when I have a conversation with him, because I
[1:04:59] Speaker 1: don't want to be disre respectful to anyone. Because I
[1:05:02] Speaker 1: don't think, at least with my family, that I would
[1:05:05] Speaker 1: even bother to have conversations with other people. I won't
[1:05:08] Speaker 1: say they don't matter, but I want a good result
[1:05:13] Speaker 1: out of it, So I'm gonna have to talk to
[1:05:15] Speaker 1: them separately and calmly in a different environment probably than
[1:05:19] Speaker 1: whatever happened, but I will give a warning, like, please
[1:05:23] Speaker 1: don't take this person's actions personal. I can talk about
[1:05:26] Speaker 1: it and I can check them, but like, I just
[1:05:28] Speaker 1: got to give warnings about some people, and I wish
[1:05:31] Speaker 1: I could just like no throw out to lead them.
[1:05:33] Speaker 1: And that's frustrating because it's also like, why do people
[1:05:37] Speaker 1: choose to show up like that in family situations, especially
[1:05:42] Speaker 1: when it's like nobody did anything to you, nobody, there
[1:05:46] Speaker 1: is no like actual issue. You just decided you were
[1:05:50] Speaker 1: gonna be a fucking bitch today, and like why what
[1:05:54] Speaker 1: happened to you or what didn't happen to you? But
[1:05:57] Speaker 1: whatever it is, it has nothing to do with a
[1:05:59] Speaker 1: person that you're projecting your feelings on, and so like
[1:06:01] Speaker 1: what's going on? I don't like that, and it's frustrated.
[1:06:05] Speaker 1: I have dealt with that, and I'm just like, you know,
[1:06:07] Speaker 1: it's some people. I'm just gonna have to add you
[1:06:11] Speaker 1: to the praier list because you're obviously stick in the
[1:06:14] Speaker 1: fucking head and something's wrong with you and you might
[1:06:15] Speaker 1: need to get medicated. Yeah, and not with alcohol, with
[1:06:19] Speaker 1: an actual prescription drug.
[1:06:23] Speaker 2: Something. With the women, I feel like women always do this.
[1:06:27] Speaker 1: Yeah, the women are definitely more difficult. I will say
[1:06:30] Speaker 1: my dad is not very nice, but I'm like, don't
[1:06:32] Speaker 1: even worry about him, because well, y'all know the stories.
[1:06:35] Speaker 1: I won't rehashit today. But my actual dad, it's just like,
[1:06:38] Speaker 1: we ain't even gonna worry about it. He don't know. Yeah,
[1:06:41] Speaker 1: then like, uh, he's crazy. But I do think it's weird.
[1:06:44] Speaker 1: With the women, I like that I don't know. And
[1:06:46] Speaker 1: the mother is like, I've even had a talk with
[1:06:47] Speaker 1: my mother, thank you a little too much when it
[1:06:51] Speaker 1: comes to my brother.
[1:06:55] Speaker 2: Now, that be a conversation when you talk to your
[1:06:56] Speaker 2: own mama about your own brother.
[1:06:59] Speaker 1: Yeah, because I I've seen it like lots of different ways.
[1:07:01] Speaker 1: And sometimes I feel like the sisters will be ganggang
[1:07:05] Speaker 1: with the mama and feel like it's almost like nobody's
[1:07:08] Speaker 1: good enough. Nothing that the boy chooses is right, and
[1:07:11] Speaker 1: it's like you're trying to micromanage them. And I am
[1:07:14] Speaker 1: so glad that me and my sisters are all on
[1:07:16] Speaker 1: the same accord and won't tell my mom and call
[1:07:18] Speaker 1: her out when she's doing too much. And she is receptive,
[1:07:21] Speaker 1: like I don't think she always realizes, and sometimes she's like,
[1:07:24] Speaker 1: that's my baby boy. Okay, we now, but he ain't
[1:07:26] Speaker 1: a babe me no more. We gotta let him grow
[1:07:28] Speaker 1: up because you want to take care of somebody forever,
[1:07:31] Speaker 1: because that's what will happen. You're raising a maandchild. So
[1:07:34] Speaker 1: what you want, no, let him go. She was even
[1:07:36] Speaker 1: hit me up this weekend, trying to give me. This
[1:07:38] Speaker 1: had nothing to do with relationships, but she was telling
[1:07:40] Speaker 1: me like to do certain things for him. I said, okay,
[1:07:43] Speaker 1: but I didn't do it. I just said it to
[1:07:47] Speaker 1: shut her up. She don't have way be listening to
[1:07:48] Speaker 1: me anyway.
[1:07:49] Speaker 2: I don't want not now one son, not one. I've
[1:07:52] Speaker 2: said this from.
[1:07:54] Speaker 1: I didn't even want a boyfucking dog. I didn't care
[1:07:57] Speaker 1: what nobody told I.
[1:07:57] Speaker 2: Just I too like boy dogs. I don't want another girl.
[1:08:00] Speaker 2: Why not? There's just too difficult shy. It took a
[1:08:04] Speaker 2: long time to get shy, like just to be a
[1:08:06] Speaker 2: normal fucking dog. And she's still not even a normal dog.
[1:08:09] Speaker 2: She doesn't like the grass. She screams when she sees
[1:08:11] Speaker 2: the dog. She's so emotional all all the time. She
[1:08:15] Speaker 2: it's just a lot. The period thing was a lot.
[1:08:17] Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Like Wally is just a horny girl. And
[1:08:20] Speaker 1: I'd be like, girl, you can't back it up every
[1:08:23] Speaker 1: time you see a pit bull. I get it, sister,
[1:08:25] Speaker 1: we see each other because I feel like there's an
[1:08:27] Speaker 1: equivalent to a pit bull to a man, you know
[1:08:29] Speaker 1: what I mean, Like how Mufossa was a handsome line right,
[1:08:33] Speaker 1: and then Simba grew up to be handsome too, But
[1:08:36] Speaker 1: it was just like Mufossa was. You know how some
[1:08:37] Speaker 1: of the animals being the movies, I feel like them
[1:08:42] Speaker 1: strong pit bulls where it's just like you've been pumping
[1:08:44] Speaker 1: iron like you and I'm like, oh no, baby, girl,
[1:08:52] Speaker 1: I gotta pick you up because we might be on
[1:08:54] Speaker 1: an elevator together. That girl has been backing that ass
[1:08:57] Speaker 1: up like juvenile was on.
[1:08:58] Speaker 2: Are you gonna get her fixed?
[1:08:59] Speaker 1: I am. I just haven't gotten around you because I
[1:09:01] Speaker 1: really need to be. I want you to be there
[1:09:03] Speaker 1: for the two weeks because she will take them stitches
[1:09:05] Speaker 1: out and all I need is to come home and her,
[1:09:08] Speaker 1: damn well, hers will be gone. Some of her enterns
[1:09:11] Speaker 1: are just laying around us. I don't know, some might
[1:09:13] Speaker 1: be all off. I don't want that happened, and I
[1:09:16] Speaker 1: do baby her. And then I've also noticed this. She'd
[1:09:20] Speaker 1: be real flirtatious with the men, and I'm like, you'll
[1:09:24] Speaker 1: take such a thirsty bitch like girl, relax, you horny girl,
[1:09:28] Speaker 1: you horny girl. We saw a puppy pit bull at
[1:09:31] Speaker 1: Fox Brothers. I was at Fox Brothers again this week
[1:09:35] Speaker 1: and run it because my brother was like, oh, okay,
[1:09:37] Speaker 1: we go to that barbecue place that we had before. Hey,
[1:09:42] Speaker 1: uh did you go to Can we go to that
[1:09:43] Speaker 1: barbecue place? And I was like absolutely, I was thinking
[1:09:47] Speaker 1: about it. I have some crawfish, but I was like,
[1:09:49] Speaker 1: I can eat this. I'm gonna get a two for today,
[1:09:51] Speaker 1: all of my face. Anyway, little fresh pit bull, what
[1:09:54] Speaker 1: color do they call Do they call them blue when
[1:09:56] Speaker 1: they're like that grayish color? Yes? Yes, I mean it
[1:09:59] Speaker 1: was a cute one. But and I'm like, this is
[1:10:00] Speaker 1: a baby. He ain't got his muscles yet. They gonna
[1:10:03] Speaker 1: get there. He's probably a few months because you know
[1:10:05] Speaker 1: how they be little, I mean big when they're little. Anyway,
[1:10:09] Speaker 1: she tried to break away from the table and get
[1:10:11] Speaker 1: over there. I said, you are a horning girl. I've
[1:10:15] Speaker 1: got to get this under control. You've got to get
[1:10:17] Speaker 1: fixed because I'm too young to be a grandmother already.
[1:10:20] Speaker 2: The whole opposite. Shy has all She hates every dog, really,
[1:10:24] Speaker 2: every single one. I don't know what happened to her.
[1:10:27] Speaker 1: She's from Chicago, so that's some might have happened for
[1:10:31] Speaker 1: you got her, you know, definitely, this was this.
[1:10:34] Speaker 2: Was a good discussion.
[1:10:36] Speaker 1: It was do y'all have mama's and are you raising
[1:10:39] Speaker 1: a mama's boy? Because we got a lot of mamas,
[1:10:41] Speaker 1: We got a lot of momas here. Maybe you should
[1:10:43] Speaker 1: check yourself and see, like you might think that you're
[1:10:45] Speaker 1: being loving and guiding, but ask yourself and am doing
[1:10:49] Speaker 1: am I being controlling?
[1:10:51] Speaker 2: Am I doing him a disservice? And I think you
[1:10:52] Speaker 2: can still be a mama's boy, And it's in a
[1:10:55] Speaker 2: healthy way.
[1:10:56] Speaker 1: What's healthy about a mama's boy?
[1:10:58] Speaker 2: You can still you know, love your mama like we're
[1:11:00] Speaker 2: gonna honor my mom too. It like she I want
[1:11:02] Speaker 2: her to be a part of all the things and stuff.
[1:11:04] Speaker 2: But there's just a way you gotta go about it.
[1:11:06] Speaker 2: You gotta make sure that you let your mom, know
[1:11:10] Speaker 2: who is the head bitch in charge?
[1:11:13] Speaker 1: Who is the A to B I C? And it
[1:11:15] Speaker 1: better be me? Yeah, I mean or or for me?
[1:11:18] Speaker 2: I think for some women that can work, and they're
[1:11:21] Speaker 2: normally the type of women who've never left their hometown.
[1:11:23] Speaker 2: And that's just how this goes. I can't do that,
[1:11:27] Speaker 2: like we have to. I am a loving person, but
[1:11:28] Speaker 2: we have to share this platform. This, ma'am, this is not.
[1:11:32] Speaker 1: I'm not sharing no platform. You just need to get
[1:11:34] Speaker 1: in line. You can come or you can get left
[1:11:36] Speaker 1: off the envine. I'm sorry.
[1:11:37] Speaker 2: I thought I told your mom you can't do that.
[1:11:41] Speaker 2: You can't do that, but she can do what she
[1:11:43] Speaker 2: wants to do.
[1:11:43] Speaker 1: No, because that would only happen if you is being
[1:11:46] Speaker 1: disrespectful and cutting up. But you cut up, get cut off?
[1:11:49] Speaker 1: How about that?
[1:11:51] Speaker 2: I know?
[1:11:51] Speaker 1: Husband, though.
[1:11:54] Speaker 2: We were sitting here playing it's like playing SIMS.
[1:12:00] Speaker 1: Wait to play when I get Oh, I just love
[1:12:01] Speaker 1: the SIMS. I've been trying to play for three weeks.
[1:12:06] Speaker 1: You should do you have a desktop computer that I do?
[1:12:09] Speaker 3: Yeah?
[1:12:10] Speaker 1: Yeah, get the SIMS girl. It's just fun. Yeah, okay,
[1:12:14] Speaker 1: not to buy it, but it's not like you. It's
[1:12:16] Speaker 1: not a subscription. Oh Okay, you just pay right now,
[1:12:21] Speaker 1: you can really get like the Bass game for like
[1:12:23] Speaker 1: tim Bucks, what.
[1:12:23] Speaker 2: Are we doing and you just running around opening doors.
[1:12:28] Speaker 1: You create a whole life. You can have a family,
[1:12:31] Speaker 1: you canna have kids. You can get a job, you
[1:12:32] Speaker 1: can not get a job. You do all sorts of things.
[1:12:36] Speaker 1: I really want to PC desktop, like a true gaming desktop,
[1:12:40] Speaker 1: because I was like, you know what, instead of all
[1:12:42] Speaker 1: these crazy ideas that I have that never turn into anything,
[1:12:45] Speaker 1: maybe I should just play the sims and make the
[1:12:49] Speaker 1: sims be the stories that like I ramble on about
[1:12:52] Speaker 1: and like play that. I can put it on YouTube
[1:12:53] Speaker 1: because people got like little YouTube soap operas basically and
[1:12:57] Speaker 1: dramas and stuff.
[1:13:00] Speaker 2: Meet your sam. No, okay, it's not.
[1:13:03] Speaker 1: Like it doesn't work like that. Okay, they tried that,
[1:13:06] Speaker 1: but it was it was making it too hard. But
[1:13:10] Speaker 1: you could show pictures, you can share stuff. It's a
[1:13:13] Speaker 1: fun game. It's a great stress reliever. Anyway, I guess
[1:13:16] Speaker 1: that's it for today. We will move on. There's time
[1:13:48] Speaker 1: for advice. If you would like some advice from two
[1:13:51] Speaker 1: girls who are just trying to figure it out. I'm
[1:13:52] Speaker 1: just a girl. Email us ask cocktail. No advice at
[1:13:58] Speaker 1: cocktailspod dot com.
[1:14:00] Speaker 2: Okay, this one is titled eight months in and just
[1:14:04] Speaker 2: learned he has a nine year old?
[1:14:06] Speaker 1: Okay, what the fuck? What the helly? That's my new
[1:14:10] Speaker 1: favorite thing. What the helly?
[1:14:12] Speaker 2: Oh Jesus, Okay, ladies, I love you and all that jazz,
[1:14:16] Speaker 2: but I need to get right into it. After being
[1:14:18] Speaker 2: single a little over a year, I met this beautiful
[1:14:21] Speaker 2: man on tender and surprisingly we hit it off and
[1:14:24] Speaker 2: have been together since our first date eight months ago.
[1:14:28] Speaker 2: He was honest with me. Then he was on tender
[1:14:31] Speaker 2: looking for fun and didn't anticipate meeting someone that he
[1:14:34] Speaker 2: could build a relationship with. Wait a minute, he was honest.
[1:14:39] Speaker 2: Let me Did I read it right? He was honest
[1:14:41] Speaker 2: with me, but the title of it was I just
[1:14:42] Speaker 2: found Okay, he was honest with me. Then he was
[1:14:46] Speaker 2: on tender looking for fun and didn't anticipate meeting someone
[1:14:49] Speaker 2: that he could build a relationship with.
[1:14:50] Speaker 1: I guess that's the honest part, that he didn't want
[1:14:52] Speaker 1: a relationship, but he kept the child hidden, so he
[1:14:57] Speaker 1: wasn't honest.
[1:14:58] Speaker 2: No, he was only honest about the one thing is
[1:15:00] Speaker 2: when I say, yeah, all right, admittedly I didn't either,
[1:15:04] Speaker 2: and yet here we are falling for each other.
[1:15:07] Speaker 1: Are you sure.
[1:15:09] Speaker 2: He lives about thirty minutes away from me in New Jersey?
[1:15:12] Speaker 2: I'm in New York and always comes to my place
[1:15:15] Speaker 2: or date night near me. When I asked why I
[1:15:18] Speaker 2: couldn't go to his place, he said he was clearing
[1:15:20] Speaker 2: up a situation with an ex mm. I read that
[1:15:25] Speaker 2: to mean they were still involved or at least lived together,
[1:15:28] Speaker 2: and proceeded with caution, don't proceed stop us. Read fast
[1:15:37] Speaker 2: forward a few months and I told him what I
[1:15:40] Speaker 2: really liked about him was his honesty. So he decided
[1:15:44] Speaker 2: it was time to tell me the truth and admitted
[1:15:46] Speaker 2: to having a daughter from a previous relationship. We have
[1:15:50] Speaker 2: had our own pregnancy scares and have talked about children,
[1:15:52] Speaker 2: and this man never said he had a child. We
[1:15:56] Speaker 2: asked each other explicitly about that during our first day
[1:16:00] Speaker 2: and proceeded and proceeded believing we were both never married
[1:16:03] Speaker 2: and had no children. The daughter lives in another state
[1:16:06] Speaker 2: and was seeing his daughter regularly up until around the
[1:16:10] Speaker 2: time we met, and her mom moved even further away.
[1:16:13] Speaker 2: I guess my question is do we continue on this
[1:16:16] Speaker 2: path of growing and love and trying to build a future,
[1:16:18] Speaker 2: or do I cut my losses and get back on
[1:16:20] Speaker 2: the apps. If it helps. I'm forty five and he's
[1:16:24] Speaker 2: forty one. Signed Happily ever after or naw, please keep
[1:16:31] Speaker 2: me anonymous. PS. If we keep this going, I'll have
[1:16:35] Speaker 2: a cocktail for you too. Lol. Ain't nothing to laugh
[1:16:38] Speaker 2: out loud about. It ain't one thing to laugh out
[1:16:41] Speaker 2: loud about. The answer is or no, this is sometimes,
[1:16:46] Speaker 2: and this is clearly something that has to keep being
[1:16:51] Speaker 2: I'm trying to read it has to keep being reiterated
[1:16:55] Speaker 2: because I truly maybe we're eating too much protein. Maybe
[1:16:58] Speaker 2: there's something in the in the food that we're eating
[1:17:02] Speaker 2: that is making us like this. Because I don't like
[1:17:06] Speaker 2: when people highlight one good quality about somebody and you
[1:17:09] Speaker 2: take it and you pizza roll it around the whole person.
[1:17:14] Speaker 2: This is not an honest person, and you took one
[1:17:17] Speaker 2: good thing and you made it the whole person.
[1:17:21] Speaker 1: And we have layers we do.
[1:17:24] Speaker 2: I can't even answer this for you because to me,
[1:17:26] Speaker 2: it comes down to what do you want? Friend? What
[1:17:31] Speaker 2: do you want? I know what I want, so I'm
[1:17:33] Speaker 2: I'm answering this based off of what I would want.
[1:17:37] Speaker 2: I don't think I can handle someone who lied about
[1:17:40] Speaker 2: a nine amnos year old child. The child is not
[1:17:46] Speaker 2: yos years the.
[1:17:48] Speaker 1: Child's is here.
[1:17:50] Speaker 2: The child is nig like, that's not that's a nine
[1:17:55] Speaker 2: year old human child. Like you have to think about
[1:18:01] Speaker 2: you're forty one, you have you're forty five, and he's
[1:18:05] Speaker 2: forty one. And so if no one, if you've shared
[1:18:08] Speaker 2: this story with your friends, and if no one has
[1:18:11] Speaker 2: said this to you, and I'm saying this as gently
[1:18:13] Speaker 2: and as clearly as I can gently, if this is
[1:18:18] Speaker 2: the life that you want, which is being with someone
[1:18:20] Speaker 2: who if they can lie to you about a nine
[1:18:22] Speaker 2: year old child, imagine what else there is to explore
[1:18:28] Speaker 2: in him. This for again, I'm basing this off of
[1:18:33] Speaker 2: my experiences. I do not want a family and a
[1:18:37] Speaker 2: child so badly that I will I will go to this.
[1:18:43] Speaker 2: I won't even call it settle because maybe to this
[1:18:45] Speaker 2: for you, this isn't settling. I don't know you, but
[1:18:48] Speaker 2: this ain't it. The child is nine years old and
[1:18:55] Speaker 2: he always comes to you. This is why we end
[1:19:00] Speaker 2: up in situations where you're killing someone and now there's
[1:19:06] Speaker 2: a story. I didn't think that's where otagen this is?
[1:19:12] Speaker 1: This isn't I that would you feel if you were
[1:19:15] Speaker 1: a nine year old mama Sita's mama, and this is
[1:19:19] Speaker 1: a situation and you find out why. You just trying
[1:19:23] Speaker 1: to relax, listen to cocktails, and you hear a story
[1:19:26] Speaker 1: that sounds all too familiar, and you hear that your
[1:19:29] Speaker 1: baby daddy been running around town after being on tender.
[1:19:33] Speaker 2: Lying again, this ain't the first time he did this.
[1:19:36] Speaker 1: And denying your child. Would you also, I'm I wasn't
[1:19:41] Speaker 1: gonna say it, but I am. How many people were
[1:19:43] Speaker 1: in your classes growing up? I'm just wondering because the
[1:19:50] Speaker 1: reasoning skills don't seem to be there. This doesn't make sense.
[1:19:52] Speaker 1: You had a pregnancy scare. By the grace of God,
[1:19:55] Speaker 1: you good right? You don't want to have I wouldn't
[1:19:59] Speaker 1: want to have a child with someone who would be
[1:20:02] Speaker 1: okay for whatever reason, because I don't think there's ever
[1:20:05] Speaker 1: an excuse for this. Wouldn't tell me about a child.
[1:20:08] Speaker 1: We're talking about children. We're talking about never being married.
[1:20:12] Speaker 1: You don't have children, and he's telling you he's never
[1:20:14] Speaker 1: had children, or even if he alluded to it, it's
[1:20:17] Speaker 1: just like, you have a nine year old. Did you
[1:20:19] Speaker 1: just find out about the child? Is this a new development?
[1:20:23] Speaker 1: Like what's see this is a new development, and you
[1:20:27] Speaker 1: forgot or what's going on? And why? And why do
[1:20:31] Speaker 1: you leastime Sam time? Where does the baby live? One
[1:20:35] Speaker 1: of them is in New York, one of them is
[1:20:37] Speaker 1: in New Jersey.
[1:20:38] Speaker 2: That but that's why I say, like, ma'am, you have
[1:20:41] Speaker 2: to really think about the type of not just that
[1:20:43] Speaker 2: you want a family and you want a baby and
[1:20:45] Speaker 2: you want a husband. You have to think about the
[1:20:46] Speaker 2: type of life that you want. And I'm here with you,
[1:20:49] Speaker 2: I really am, because I one time exited a relationship
[1:20:53] Speaker 2: because I watched someone that I kind of loved him,
[1:20:57] Speaker 2: but I watched how he handled his family life. He
[1:21:02] Speaker 2: had two kids, and I watched how he put me
[1:21:06] Speaker 2: before his children. And there are women that would honor
[1:21:09] Speaker 2: that and be like, this is how it should be
[1:21:11] Speaker 2: as someone who really values family. I cannot respect that
[1:21:15] Speaker 2: you decided to bring children into this world and you
[1:21:18] Speaker 2: were not taking care of them the way that I
[1:21:20] Speaker 2: see fit that I know, what type of life do
[1:21:24] Speaker 2: you want for yourself? If you want it to be
[1:21:27] Speaker 2: with someone who lies about having a child, go all in,
[1:21:31] Speaker 2: dive in. If you want somebody to honor you and
[1:21:35] Speaker 2: your child that you might give them.
[1:21:38] Speaker 1: This ain't it. Are you trying to live like you're
[1:21:42] Speaker 1: on an episode of Good Times? Or do you want
[1:21:45] Speaker 1: to live like you on an episode of the Jefferson?
[1:21:46] Speaker 1: Are we gonna live in the d luxe apartment? Are
[1:21:48] Speaker 1: we gonna have a good life, a great life? Or
[1:21:51] Speaker 1: are we gonna be dealing with people putting irons on
[1:21:53] Speaker 1: a I mean, it's just all this just all a mess.
[1:21:55] Speaker 2: And if you just want a baby, go do the
[1:21:58] Speaker 2: thing that you can do the the injection what's it called.
[1:22:01] Speaker 1: Where you can have a baby artificial insemination? Go do
[1:22:05] Speaker 1: that down at the lab.
[1:22:06] Speaker 2: Because you're gonna still be by yourself. Like, if you
[1:22:10] Speaker 2: do this with him, bro, it ain't.
[1:22:12] Speaker 1: Gonna be back on tender getting another way, and he
[1:22:15] Speaker 1: ain't gonna be making you nothing but promises and more siblings.
[1:22:18] Speaker 2: For your child. You have to look at people's behaviors.
[1:22:21] Speaker 1: Well he's on the internet talk about his damn lad.
[1:22:23] Speaker 2: You're to look at people's behaviors. I'm not saying they
[1:22:25] Speaker 2: can't change them, but you also have to look at
[1:22:27] Speaker 2: our people doing the work to change them.
[1:22:31] Speaker 1: Girl, give it up. You said it should I some
[1:22:35] Speaker 1: something some or not. It's just orna heart. Stop leave
[1:22:39] Speaker 1: it alone. For real. Sorry to go it on you,
[1:22:41] Speaker 1: but girl, stop you. You was just going through something.
[1:22:46] Speaker 1: Maybe it was period time. We all make irrational decisions
[1:22:48] Speaker 1: at some time. But like, you don't want that because
[1:22:50] Speaker 1: it sounds like you do want children one day and
[1:22:52] Speaker 1: other things. Leave that shit alone. It's time to move
[1:22:54] Speaker 1: on for cocktails because this advice is just too much
[1:22:59] Speaker 1: and you don't make no cocktails to you make different
[1:23:02] Speaker 1: decisions with.
[1:23:02] Speaker 2: The gonna be a cocktail, the hell is not. You
[1:23:06] Speaker 2: need to be a revelation. Okay, uh huh, but I come.
[1:23:26] Speaker 1: Is it some catch in the.
[1:23:30] Speaker 2: Once upon a time not long ago?
[1:23:32] Speaker 1: I was a Now it's time for the cocktails. If
[1:23:37] Speaker 1: you have a cocktail that you would like to send
[1:23:39] Speaker 1: in with somebody who is not denying their children, please
[1:23:43] Speaker 1: email us cocktails at cocktails pot dot com. Okay, so
[1:23:47] Speaker 1: this one says a surprise golden shower miss those I
[1:23:53] Speaker 1: do not care for that. I was actually I did
[1:23:55] Speaker 1: get on the internet for a minute. I saw I
[1:23:56] Speaker 1: was going on with Diddy and them, you know, the
[1:23:58] Speaker 1: trial started, and I saw what was going on with them,
[1:24:02] Speaker 1: Golden showers all.
[1:24:03] Speaker 2: Day and the baby the baby oil baby shower, the
[1:24:07] Speaker 2: baby oil dips in the tub.
[1:24:09] Speaker 1: And the pool, the bulls in the road.
[1:24:11] Speaker 2: I want to know what it was. I'm not if
[1:24:14] Speaker 2: I don't want to walk in the baby bottom pool.
[1:24:17] Speaker 2: I'm not walking in the baby oil pool.
[1:24:19] Speaker 1: Let me not get started on this because I got
[1:24:21] Speaker 1: a lot of feelings about that. Okay. Anyway, back to
[1:24:25] Speaker 1: this girl and in her golden shower. I hope this
[1:24:28] Speaker 1: is an ending in sadness, and I hope you like it.
[1:24:30] Speaker 2: Lord.
[1:24:31] Speaker 1: Okay, hey, beautiful, so I want you to try to
[1:24:33] Speaker 1: keep this short. You did not, but that's all right,
[1:24:36] Speaker 1: Like it's the whole baby, it's not short, but that's
[1:24:39] Speaker 1: all right. You was probably having a wonderful time.
[1:24:42] Speaker 2: Okay.
[1:24:42] Speaker 1: So one night I went to an R and B
[1:24:44] Speaker 1: party with my homegirls, and my little situationship was there
[1:24:46] Speaker 1: with his hound boys.
[1:24:47] Speaker 2: I went to an R and B party a few
[1:24:49] Speaker 2: weeks ago. I thought I could handle a bitch. I
[1:24:51] Speaker 2: was in there crying. Sorry, that's the R and B
[1:24:54] Speaker 2: R and B party.
[1:24:55] Speaker 1: When they played, it was a lot of R and B.
[1:25:00] Speaker 1: Oh all right, Well, anyway, I was surprised to see
[1:25:05] Speaker 1: his fine ass. Was still very excited. I planned on
[1:25:07] Speaker 1: trying to see him after, but I wasn't really sure
[1:25:10] Speaker 1: if that was going to happen. He came up to
[1:25:11] Speaker 1: me and my homegirls and we all started chatting it up,
[1:25:14] Speaker 1: and he started feeling on my booty. I started singing
[1:25:16] Speaker 1: song that's not appropriate, and I already knew where the
[1:25:20] Speaker 1: night was going. We were both lit, so a time
[1:25:22] Speaker 1: was about to be had. Let's fast forward to the
[1:25:25] Speaker 1: after party. He meets me at my hotel room at
[1:25:27] Speaker 1: about one in the morning. We take some shots and
[1:25:29] Speaker 1: we get to it. I start to suck his dick
[1:25:32] Speaker 1: and he tells me to get on top. Ooh, I
[1:25:35] Speaker 1: can't do that like I used to. Y'all. My hip
[1:25:37] Speaker 1: be cracking. So anyway, so I do we sew into it?
[1:25:41] Speaker 1: He asking me do I miss him, telling me he
[1:25:44] Speaker 1: loves me, saying this his pussy and he is going
[1:25:48] Speaker 1: to nutt in it. Ooh, y'all got to be careful.
[1:25:52] Speaker 3: Now.
[1:25:52] Speaker 1: I'm not on birth control, but I'm very much like yolooo,
[1:25:56] Speaker 1: you be careful, girl, be careful. So I'm like, yeah, daddy, nothing, yo,
[1:26:00] Speaker 1: pussy people be doing this. I did it before. That
[1:26:04] Speaker 1: was not a good decision, your horrible decision.
[1:26:05] Speaker 2: Do not.
[1:26:07] Speaker 1: Anyway, we changed into different positions and he's still talking
[1:26:10] Speaker 1: his shit. He was very vocal this night, and I
[1:26:13] Speaker 1: loved every bit of it. He even asked me if
[1:26:15] Speaker 1: I was keeping the baby and what we were naming it. Ooh.
[1:26:19] Speaker 1: He putting a spell on you, girl, y'all. I'm so delusional.
[1:26:23] Speaker 1: I told him, of course, and it was going to
[1:26:25] Speaker 1: be a junior. It felt like we was making love. Anyways.
[1:26:28] Speaker 1: We had sex for at least two hours, and we
[1:26:30] Speaker 1: kept taking very small breaks, like a few minutes. He
[1:26:34] Speaker 1: was turning me every which way but loose, being very
[1:26:37] Speaker 1: demanding about what he wanted and how I obeyed every command.
[1:26:41] Speaker 2: I was in heaven.
[1:26:43] Speaker 1: I knew we were both drunk, but he was more
[1:26:46] Speaker 1: drunk than I understood. In that moment. The man wouldn't nut,
[1:26:51] Speaker 1: which has never been a problem for him before, and
[1:26:53] Speaker 1: every time we stopped, he was like nah and wanted
[1:26:56] Speaker 1: to go again. He wanted that nut, and I wanted
[1:26:58] Speaker 1: him to have it on my knees, to suck his
[1:27:01] Speaker 1: stick again. And he is finally telling me he's about
[1:27:03] Speaker 1: to nut, so I do not stop. I wondered it
[1:27:06] Speaker 1: in my mouth. I was going to swallow it. Ooh, girl,
[1:27:09] Speaker 1: y'all was having a blast next thing you know, he
[1:27:11] Speaker 1: starts doing a sound like he's coming, So I continue
[1:27:14] Speaker 1: to suck and swallow, but then I realized someone wasn't right.
[1:27:19] Speaker 1: Oh shit, I see where this is going. So I
[1:27:23] Speaker 1: stopped swallowing and my mouth started feeling up with a liquid.
[1:27:29] Speaker 1: I popped his dick out so fast, and the next
[1:27:31] Speaker 1: thing you know, he's peeing on my fucking titties. I
[1:27:34] Speaker 1: added the fucking but he don't realize he's doing it.
[1:27:38] Speaker 1: I'm also in shock, so in the midst of it all,
[1:27:40] Speaker 1: I swallowed the pee the gut in my mouth and
[1:27:42] Speaker 1: shortly realized what the fuck I just did. When he
[1:27:46] Speaker 1: saw me wet, he was confused and I didn't say much.
[1:27:49] Speaker 1: He did not realize he peed instead of nutted, and
[1:27:51] Speaker 1: I was speechless.
[1:27:53] Speaker 2: Is that I didn't know he was drunk.
[1:27:56] Speaker 1: He was really, really drunk, and she they didn't realize it.
[1:27:59] Speaker 1: So anyway, he then goes to pee in the bathroom
[1:28:01] Speaker 1: and I get in the shower. Luckily, his pea was
[1:28:03] Speaker 1: clear and didn't smell. Well, bitch, was he drunk or high? Anyways?
[1:28:07] Speaker 1: You would think I would have ended the night, but no,
[1:28:09] Speaker 1: you are a nasty girl. Somehow someway after I got
[1:28:13] Speaker 1: off the shower. One thing led to another, and my
[1:28:16] Speaker 1: toes are in his mouth and he starts to eat
[1:28:18] Speaker 1: my pussy, your toes her in his mouth. A yeah, pussy, bitchy, flexible, Okay.
[1:28:24] Speaker 1: I turn around for backshots and he finally nutted and
[1:28:27] Speaker 1: it was in me. He passes out sleep immediately and
[1:28:30] Speaker 1: he is hanging off the bed. I kind of drag
[1:28:32] Speaker 1: him into a better position and I joined him with sleep.
[1:28:35] Speaker 1: The next morning he left and went to work. He
[1:28:38] Speaker 1: had no recollection of the night. He blacked out after
[1:28:40] Speaker 1: we took them shots. He doesn't remember peeing on me,
[1:28:43] Speaker 1: nothing in me and sex after like the first ten minutes,
[1:28:48] Speaker 1: other than the pea A time was really had. The
[1:28:51] Speaker 1: night goes into the books. He apologized and still does
[1:28:55] Speaker 1: when it comes back up. But I just laugh at
[1:28:57] Speaker 1: it for now. Truly a moment I'll never forget. Sorry
[1:29:00] Speaker 1: for the long email. I hope y'all enjoyed this embarrassing story.
[1:29:03] Speaker 1: Left my ass off. PS, we also will that got
[1:29:05] Speaker 1: cut off. That was a good one. That's a story.
[1:29:07] Speaker 1: I'm glad you had good spears because I would.
[1:29:09] Speaker 2: She's pregnant, now, that's what I was thinking to your
[1:29:14] Speaker 2: baby shower. That's absolutely you're.
[1:29:17] Speaker 1: Having a cocktail baby. What's you gonna name her? A
[1:29:20] Speaker 1: short night?
[1:29:22] Speaker 2: Speaking of cocktail babies, did I tell you that there
[1:29:24] Speaker 2: was a girl she's slid in my d MS. She
[1:29:26] Speaker 2: invited me to her wedding and she had sent in
[1:29:30] Speaker 2: a cock tell before she invited her wedding. And I
[1:29:32] Speaker 2: really was going to try to make it, but I couldn't.
[1:29:34] Speaker 2: Maybe I couldn't make it.
[1:29:35] Speaker 1: But I was like, you know what if you congratulate congratulations.
[1:29:39] Speaker 2: I can't remember her name, but I was. I just
[1:29:41] Speaker 2: felt so honor. I was like, oh my gosh, I
[1:29:42] Speaker 2: would absolutely come, Kiky, and I would come if y'all
[1:29:44] Speaker 2: have baby showers, if you have weddings and it is
[1:29:46] Speaker 2: inspired somehow you had a cocktail, you got pregnant, and
[1:29:48] Speaker 2: you have a baby shower, and we can make it,
[1:29:50] Speaker 2: I will come. Especially, Yeah, there needs to be food
[1:29:55] Speaker 2: and I need a little cocktail.
[1:29:56] Speaker 1: And I don't eat as much as I used to
[1:29:57] Speaker 1: because of life our eggs. She don't want to little taste. Yeah.
[1:30:01] Speaker 2: I mean, if you really just want us to come,
[1:30:03] Speaker 2: just get the delta flight. Get us a delta flight.
[1:30:06] Speaker 1: All right. Now we're getting carried away anyway, you guys,
[1:30:10] Speaker 1: I hope that you enjoyed this episode. We will be
[1:30:14] Speaker 1: doing a Patreon live at the end of the Mind
[1:30:16] Speaker 1: with Good Minds by Choices.
[1:30:17] Speaker 2: Yes, I can't wait to catch up with them.
[1:30:19] Speaker 1: Yes, so I think that is the last Thursday of
[1:30:23] Speaker 1: this month, like the twenty nine something like that. Check
[1:30:26] Speaker 1: the description box for the links to everything. Make sure
[1:30:28] Speaker 1: you sign up for all the things, join the book club,
[1:30:31] Speaker 1: take the trips, do all that fun stuff, and keep
[1:30:35] Speaker 1: tuning in every week. We appreciate you, guys, and I
[1:30:37] Speaker 1: hope you'll have a wonderful week. Make sure you're also
[1:30:39] Speaker 1: following us on Instagram. We're at Cocktails Podcast. I'm at
[1:30:42] Speaker 1: Kiki said, so I'm a coffee And until next week,
[1:30:45] Speaker 1: you guys, Goodbye, goodbye.
[1:30:49] Speaker 2: Bye bye, b bye bye, goodbye bye bye to drive
[1:31:01] Speaker 2: bye bye bye

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