# Why Restricting Sugar Can Backfire (a Q&A About Sugar & ADHD)

An episode of [Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families](https://invisiblenetwork.ai/podcast/1082244480), 8 Jun 2026, 11 min.

Audio: https://mgln.ai/e/187/traffic.omny.fm/d/clips/fa326977-3de5-4283-9b8b-af3500c58607/b69b2795-5503-4de1-ac91-af460017906e/04b8433a-2758-44d4-b934-b45c000c929e/audio.mp3?utm_source=Podcast&in_playlist=a05f1702-0c0e-4b0f-8014-af460017907c

Cutting back sugar can help some ADHD kids feel calmer, happier, and more regulated… but how do you do it without accidentally creating food anxiety or body image struggles? In this episode, Justin and Kylie respond to a parent navigating the difficult balance between supporting an ADHD child’s wellbeing while protecting her relationship with food and her body. They unpack why the conversation should never be about weight, how parents can shift the focus toward wellbeing instead, and the powerful mindset change that helps children build healthier habits without shame or fear. KEY POINTS: • Why reducing sugar should never be framed around weight • The wellbeing-focused approach that changes everything • How ADHD kids can learn to notice how food affects their bodies • Why family culture matters more than strict food rules • The danger of becoming too “fanatical” about healthy eating • How small awareness moments create long-term change • The connection between sleep, movement, nutrition, screens, and behaviour QUOTE OF THE EPISODE: “It’s not about weight. It’s not even about behaviour. It’s about wellbeing and how we want to feel.” RESOURCES: • Misconnection by Justin Coulson • Submit your tricky questions here • Episode #957 Diet Free Families, with Dietician Meg McClintock \[Podcast\] ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: • Talk about energy, mood, focus, and wellbeing instead of weight • Make healthy changes as a whole family, not just for one child • Help children notice how different foods make them feel • Avoid perfectionism or overly strict food rules • Prioritise sleep, movement, nutritious food, and reduced screen time • Focus on progress and awareness, not instant transformation See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

## Transcript

[0:06] Speaker 1: Every Tuesday on the Happy Families Podcast, we answer your
[0:08] Speaker 1: tricky question. She can send tricky questions to us by
[0:10] Speaker 1: a Happy families dot com dot you. There's a simple,
[0:13] Speaker 1: super simple super system. It's easy to use than it
[0:16] Speaker 1: is to say, by the sounds of things, a super
[0:18] Speaker 1: simple system at happy families dot com dot you where
[0:21] Speaker 1: you can scroll down, click the record button and start talking.
[0:23] Speaker 1: Tell us what's on your mind. We love answering questions
[0:25] Speaker 1: about pretty much anything at all, and today we've got
[0:29] Speaker 1: another one of your tricky questions. Well answer that next. Hello,
[0:36] Speaker 1: Welcome to the Happy Families podcast, where you get real
[0:38] Speaker 1: parenting solutions every single day. This is Australia's most downloaded
[0:41] Speaker 1: parenting podcast where Justin and Kylie Coulson the parents of
[0:45] Speaker 1: six kids, grandparents to one grand baby. We've been through week.
[0:48] Speaker 1: We're currently going through the teen years with our fifth child.
[0:51] Speaker 1: She's sixteen, got a twelve year old, we've got a twelvey.
[0:55] Speaker 1: We have years of experience and our granddaughter is reminding
[0:57] Speaker 1: us what it's like to have a titlerr again because
[0:58] Speaker 1: she's two and a half. Kylie, somebody has sent us
[1:02] Speaker 1: a voice note with a question. Here it comes let's
[1:05] Speaker 1: check this out.
[1:07] Speaker 2: Hi, my name is Sam. I'm just inquiring as to
[1:11] Speaker 2: how you ensure with an ADHD child when reducing sugar
[1:17] Speaker 2: intake that you're also not setting the child up for
[1:21] Speaker 2: I suppose unhealthy anxiety regarding weight, especially in a girl.
[1:27] Speaker 2: I listened to your podcast this morning regarding ensuring children
[1:32] Speaker 2: have positive outlooks regarding their weight. But I also am
[1:37] Speaker 2: mindful when reducing her sugar intake, as it helps her
[1:41] Speaker 2: behavior to not create anxiety or more surrounding that.
[1:47] Speaker 1: Okay, so I'm going to jump in first, Kylie. I
[1:48] Speaker 1: know you've got a whole bunch of stuff that you
[1:49] Speaker 1: scribbled down as we were listening there. I just want
[1:52] Speaker 1: to highlight the desire to be hot. And I'm using
[1:55] Speaker 1: the word intentionally because when I did my book Misconnection,
[1:58] Speaker 1: while your teenage daughter hates you expect the world to talk,
[2:01] Speaker 1: that was precisely the language that everybody was using when
[2:03] Speaker 1: they were talking to me about body image issues. It's
[2:06] Speaker 1: primarily a female thing. Over the last few years, there's
[2:08] Speaker 1: been a slight shift. Boys are now more worried about
[2:11] Speaker 1: it than girls in terms of this looks maxing movement.
[2:14] Speaker 1: But basically this is an ongoing challenge neudiversity or not.
[2:21] Speaker 1: The World Health Organization conducted a survey of more than
[2:24] Speaker 1: two hundred thousand people nearly a quarter million people in
[2:27] Speaker 1: forty two countries, and in every single country surveyed, girls
[2:31] Speaker 1: at age fifteen were more likely than boys to report
[2:36] Speaker 1: that they were fat. Get this, Even though the girls
[2:38] Speaker 1: were saying that they were the ones that were carrying
[2:40] Speaker 1: too much weight, the boys were actually more likely to
[2:43] Speaker 1: be overweight. In other words, gender gender predicts who's going
[2:48] Speaker 1: to feel fat much better than it predicts who's going
[2:50] Speaker 1: to be carrying that additional weight. So Sam's question is
[2:56] Speaker 1: really a question I think about body image. It's a
[2:58] Speaker 1: question about physical health, and it's a question that Vexa's
[3:02] Speaker 1: parents of daughters in ways that we just we don't
[3:07] Speaker 1: encounter it to the same level and in the same
[3:09] Speaker 1: way with boys.
[3:10] Speaker 3: Sam's asking a few questions here. She wants to be
[3:13] Speaker 3: able to utilize the limitation of sugar intake to help
[3:19] Speaker 3: modify behavior, but she's also concerned that in doing so
[3:24] Speaker 3: she creates a body image issue. For me, there's actually
[3:28] Speaker 3: a really simple response to that. When we have these
[3:32] Speaker 3: conversations with our children, this is not about behavior modification.
[3:37] Speaker 3: This is not about a weight issue. This is about
[3:40] Speaker 3: a well being issue.
[3:41] Speaker 1: Yeah, I was thinking that as well. I wrote down
[3:45] Speaker 1: three things, four things, four things like this might be
[3:47] Speaker 1: the shortest podcast that I've ever done, because this is
[3:49] Speaker 1: kind of all I've got. Focus on physical activity, not wait,
[3:52] Speaker 1: focus on nutritious food, not weight, focus on minimizing screens
[3:56] Speaker 1: not wait, focus on getting enough sleep, making sure that
[3:59] Speaker 1: sleeps healthy.
[4:00] Speaker 3: And it's a holistic change. It's not about one.
[4:02] Speaker 1: Child, it's the whole family.
[4:04] Speaker 3: Like in our home, we have recognized that we actually
[4:08] Speaker 3: feel better as individuals when we limit our sugar intake.
[4:13] Speaker 3: It's not about For some of us it is a
[4:15] Speaker 3: weight loss journey, but that's not what the focus is.
[4:17] Speaker 3: The focus is how do I want to feel? I
[4:19] Speaker 3: want to feel vibrant, I want to feel vital, I
[4:21] Speaker 3: want to feel strong. And if I want those things,
[4:25] Speaker 3: then it's being aware of how different foods or different
[4:30] Speaker 3: activities impact those feelings.
[4:33] Speaker 1: Yeah, how do we feel? It's as simple as saying,
[4:35] Speaker 1: let's actually stay off process stuff this week and just
[4:37] Speaker 1: do an experiment, and then at the end of the
[4:39] Speaker 1: week we're going to go and have a little bit
[4:40] Speaker 1: of a party and We'll buy a whole lot of
[4:41] Speaker 1: process food and need a whole lot of junkie stuff.
[4:43] Speaker 1: We'll have some donuts and lives of hot chips and
[4:46] Speaker 1: whatever else. And at the end of it, you say,
[4:48] Speaker 1: had that feel like as it was going in, had
[4:49] Speaker 1: it feel amazing? How it feel five minutes later, an
[4:52] Speaker 1: hour later that night. And as the kids start to
[4:55] Speaker 1: have that recognition, then you start to have conversations about
[4:59] Speaker 1: how you want to to construct your family's health, habits, lifestyle,
[5:04] Speaker 1: diet free decisions.
[5:06] Speaker 3: So I don't know if we're oversimplifying this for you, Sam,
[5:08] Speaker 3: but to me, that just seems like the logical response
[5:13] Speaker 3: moving forward. It's not about weight, it's not actually even
[5:16] Speaker 3: about behavior. It's about well being and how I want
[5:19] Speaker 3: to feel. And when we're dealing with children, they just
[5:23] Speaker 3: listen to their brain, no matter what it says, and
[5:25] Speaker 3: their brain tells them that they want the stuff in
[5:27] Speaker 3: the bright colored, glossy papers in the packets, and we
[5:32] Speaker 3: just need to help them recognize the difference between what
[5:36] Speaker 3: it feels like to eat well and what it feels
[5:39] Speaker 3: like to not eat well and help them through that process,
[5:44] Speaker 3: because regardless of whether they have that Aha moment, depending
[5:47] Speaker 3: on what age they are, they're still going to want
[5:49] Speaker 3: to go back, but the idea is that we kind
[5:52] Speaker 3: of continue to bring them back to the idea that
[5:55] Speaker 3: as a family, we're working towards this, this is how
[5:58] Speaker 3: we want to.
[5:58] Speaker 1: Feel after the break. To build on that. It's really
[6:01] Speaker 1: important that we touch a little bit deeper on what
[6:04] Speaker 1: you're discussing. And one more key thing that every family
[6:07] Speaker 1: needs to know when it comes to making these kinds
[6:10] Speaker 1: of lifestyle and health choices. If that's the part you
[6:13] Speaker 1: decide to go down and stay with us, this is
[6:23] Speaker 1: the Happy Famili's podcast, Kylie. I want to really lift
[6:26] Speaker 1: off what you've just highlighted. We've discovered in our family,
[6:30] Speaker 1: in our own lives. Forget the kids, just you and
[6:32] Speaker 1: I with our own decisions. These things are not one
[6:35] Speaker 1: and done like you do. Not say we're going to
[6:38] Speaker 1: be healthy and make the commitment and then everything's perfect
[6:40] Speaker 1: from that point forward. You will revisit this again and
[6:44] Speaker 1: again and again and again before you really start to
[6:49] Speaker 1: get traction like this is a it's an uphill climb.
[6:52] Speaker 1: The second thing that I wanted to add is that
[6:55] Speaker 1: we can become really fanatical as parents about it. We
[6:58] Speaker 1: can get it in our head that our child can't sugar,
[7:00] Speaker 1: or we're done with process stuff, or we're going to
[7:02] Speaker 1: make sure that there are no more screens, and like,
[7:05] Speaker 1: we get really hardcore about it, and that fanaticism actually
[7:08] Speaker 1: creates a whole lot of resistance. It creates a whole
[7:10] Speaker 1: lot of tension, a whole lot of fights, and sometimes
[7:12] Speaker 1: we set the standard impossibly high for ourselves and for
[7:15] Speaker 1: our children. There's no flexibility. I remember I was in
[7:19] Speaker 1: the Channel Line studios one time having a chat with
[7:21] Speaker 1: David Campbell. I think he's vegan, at least vegetarian. I'm
[7:24] Speaker 1: pretty sure hes vegan, though, and I asked him what
[7:28] Speaker 1: his kid's diet is like, and the words he used
[7:32] Speaker 1: literally were I'm not a fanatic about this. So the
[7:36] Speaker 1: kids are allowed to go to parties, eat sugary stuff,
[7:39] Speaker 1: have party pies, whatever they want. This is a decision
[7:42] Speaker 1: that I've made for me, but I'm not making the
[7:43] Speaker 1: decision for the whole family. And I'm just hoping that
[7:46] Speaker 1: my children will see my good example and choose over
[7:48] Speaker 1: time to interrogate, think through, investigate the food and other
[7:54] Speaker 1: health choices that they're making.
[7:56] Speaker 3: We've been working on this with our kids for the
[7:58] Speaker 3: last nearly six months now.
[8:00] Speaker 1: And like hardcore for the last six months. I was
[8:02] Speaker 1: going to say the last sixteen years, yea, but yes,
[8:05] Speaker 1: properly hardcore for the last six months.
[8:08] Speaker 3: And our youngest is by far the one who's most
[8:11] Speaker 3: challenged by this.
[8:12] Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it probably fits that profile that Sam's highlighted
[8:16] Speaker 1: with her daughter as well.
[8:17] Speaker 3: Yeah, and she loves Natella. That's her number one spread
[8:22] Speaker 3: of choice. But I won't have it in the house.
[8:25] Speaker 3: But every now and again she'll ask if she can
[8:27] Speaker 3: make some crapes, and can I get her a jar
[8:30] Speaker 3: of Natella? So I buy the smallest jar I can.
[8:33] Speaker 3: And the other day when she decided that that's what
[8:37] Speaker 3: she wanted to do, she woke up the next morning
[8:39] Speaker 3: and she said, Mom, I don't think I want to
[8:41] Speaker 3: tell her anymore. And I said, what do you mean,
[8:44] Speaker 3: And she said, well, I made myself some crepes and
[8:46] Speaker 3: I had some and she said, I just didn't feel great,
[8:49] Speaker 3: and I was on the toilet for a little bit
[8:50] Speaker 3: last night, and she said, I just think my body's
[8:53] Speaker 3: kind of telling me that this isn't good for me.
[8:57] Speaker 1: I didn't know this story. You haven't shared that with.
[8:59] Speaker 3: Me, so what's the AHA moments, But it's how many.
[9:01] Speaker 1: Years it's been four or five years.
[9:03] Speaker 3: No, no, no, no, I'm going to let you know
[9:05] Speaker 3: that just because we've had an our Har moment does
[9:07] Speaker 3: not mean by any stretch that we have won the battle,
[9:12] Speaker 3: because that jar of Natella disappeared very quickly, and I
[9:16] Speaker 3: mean in spite of these in spite of that insight.
[9:19] Speaker 3: And so that's what I'm kind of suggesting for some
[9:22] Speaker 3: of us. We have to have our Har moments, often
[9:24] Speaker 3: right in the same area before it finally sinks. But
[9:28] Speaker 3: that was a really important AHA moment that she's had,
[9:31] Speaker 3: and as a result, what it's teaching me is that
[9:34] Speaker 3: even though she's still craving the thing that is not
[9:38] Speaker 3: making her feel good, she's actually starting to eat with
[9:42] Speaker 3: more consciousness. She's actually starting to become aware of how
[9:46] Speaker 3: she feels in her body when she's eating certain foods.
[9:50] Speaker 1: Okay, I mean that's not resonating with what I've been
[9:53] Speaker 1: seeing in the last couple of days in the kitchen,
[9:54] Speaker 1: but you're having more of these conversations with her than me,
[9:57] Speaker 1: and that's really refreshing to hear. So Sam, there is hope,
[9:59] Speaker 1: but it is incremental Oh my goodness. It takes a
[10:03] Speaker 1: long time, and just when you think you're making progress,
[10:05] Speaker 1: you discover that the progress is not everything that you
[10:08] Speaker 1: hope that it would be. Consistency, hope, conversations, insights, getting
[10:16] Speaker 1: the kids to actually endorse the decisions rather than you
[10:18] Speaker 1: being the unilateral arbiter who just says, here's how it's
[10:22] Speaker 1: going to be. Those the ideas that we've highlighted, plus
[10:25] Speaker 1: those three pillars of health, getting enough sleep, getting enough nutrition,
[10:30] Speaker 1: and getting enough movement, and minimizing those screens. Good luck.
[10:33] Speaker 1: Thanks for the question. If you've got a tricky question,
[10:34] Speaker 1: hit us up podcasts at happy families dot com dot
[10:37] Speaker 1: you. You can send us your voice notes, or go to
[10:39] Speaker 1: happy families dot com dot U scroll down to it
[10:41] Speaker 1: the bit where it says record and start talking. Let
[10:43] Speaker 1: us know who you are, where you're from, and what's
[10:46] Speaker 1: on your mind. The Happy Families podcast is produced by
[10:49] Speaker 1: Justin Roulin from Bridge Media. Mimhammonds provides our admin and
[10:52] Speaker 1: other support, and if you'd like more info to make
[10:54] Speaker 1: your family happier, we'd love for you to visit us
[10:57] Speaker 1: at happy families dot com dot AU or check out
[11:00] Speaker 1: our social pages. M hmm

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